just kidding


I'm staying with Pros for 2 weeks, soooo I'm distracted and probably won't have the chance to really draw anything. We're too busy being hot and awesome and super fantastic together.

Our mice, not so much. Tila is being a fucking bully and wheel hog this time. -_-

But I'll be around on IMs and such, sorta. And comments.

made me do this


1. Respond with something random about you.
2. Tell you which color you remind me of.
3. Tell you my first memory of you.
4. Tell you what animal you remind me of.
5. Ask you something I've always wondered about you.
6. Tell you my favorite thing about you.
7. Tell you my least favorite thing about you.
8. Challenge you to post this on your journal.



NO MOAR COMMENTS NOW D:
NO MOAR COMMENTS NOW D:
NO MOAR COMMENTS NOW D:
NO MOAR COMMENTS NOW D:
NO MOAR COMMENTS NOW D:
NO MOAR COMMENTS NOW D:

WE'RE CUTE








YES
LOL

So says

Draw your trainer or Pokemon now.

Well, I've been looking around and I'm not sure really where to go to download a reliable copy of it. There's only a single torrent for it on piratebay, and since the last two horrid viruses I went through, I'm kind of hesitant to try downloading most things I'm not sure of.


So help me out in getting it?

lothie.lethal


I haven't used it in a very long time
blah


btw, if you add me and your username isn't the same as on here... I'd reeeeeally appreciate if you put in the little "add this person message" thing who you are. kthnx.

Katie is on her way over to take me down to the funeral home now



yup.

because 9001 is over 9000.
blah blah blah

screenshot it, get a picture.
only taking the first person to post a working link to the screen shot HERE

in this journal
yup


I also suggest you click THIS

It's still kind of boring and mostly frustrating for me since I still can't totally grasp the controls etc. Plus I have next to no friends on here, save for and


I'm currently dancing in some place called Club Yana?

I'm bored ._.

Well the funeral is this Saturday and I'm a mess.
I'm just freaking out over all the details
What should I wear, I have to give a month-late birthday present to his grandmother because I told him I'd get her that rose, I have to give a copy of a memorial piece to his mother that she emailed me asking for [though why I have to print it out is beyond me, I posted it online for her and anyone else on FB to use].

And by the looks of it, I still have to go to my cousin's birthday party immediately afterwards, something I didn't even want to attend before all this happened. I'm extremely antisocial when I'm upset, so going to someone else's house full of family members and my cousin's friends is the total opposite of what I want.

I'm kind of hoping maybe I can linger somewhere with someone I know from the funeral afterwards and just get a ride home from them, anything really to avoid my family, because I know if my cousin finds out what's happening in my life she'll try to comfort me and start promising me more shit that she won't do. [She let's me down a lot].



I'm so nervous about talking to John's family, and I really hope I'm not the odd one out with my friends there, considering they'll all probably have their significant others with them. =/


I dunno, I just sort of needed to vent here I guess.

Alright, thank you everyone for your helpful comments and suggestions.

Thanks to and I'm up and running normally again, and working on fixing some better antivirus software.

okay, thankfully pointed out rkill.exe to me once again. I'd forgotten about using it the last time this happened.

I'm now currently running Malwarebytes full scan [about 1/3 done so far]. I still have about another hour to go, but at least now it's running when I boot up normally, and thanks to rkill I have no popups harassing me every 3 seconds.

Once the scanner is finished I'll post another journal about the results [successful or unsuccessful], I just wanted to put this up as a group message to you all [since I received so many helpful comments] so you wouldn't have to harass anymore because of a lack of a response from myself.


No malwares are found yet, but let's hope for the best?

it's called Antispyware Soft
I went to a website dedicated to killing it, followed the steps and haven't had any luck
My antiviruses [Malwarebyte and Spybot - Search & Destroy] picked up and supposedly killed it, but anytime I booted up regularly it was still there.

It's vicious and disables next to everything.

I've been stuck in safemode all day, running my scanners and deleting infections but it's always the same.

Now the scanners don't turn up anything, and now the virus is booting up [just now] in safe mode randomly?



I'm going insane with all this stress.

Someone please help me.



I'm not sure when I'll be online next, if it's popping up in Safemode now, but please leave comments here, and if I don't respond to ANYONE in the journal, forward the information to who can contact me offline.

If I can, I'll try to repay those who help me out successfully.

A friend of mine just died today and I'm sort of having a bit of a hard time dealing with it

So I'm just asking if you excuse my horribly done vent art for a while, or lack of art

I don't really know what to do

http://helloquizzy.okcupid.com/test.....enneagram-test


1 - The Perfectionist
"I do everything the right way"


Perfectionists are realistic, conscientious, and principled.
They strive to live up to their high ideals.



How to Get Along with Me

• Take your share of the responsibility so I don't end up with all the work.
• Acknowledge my achievements.
• I'm hard on myself. Reassure me that I'm fine the way I am.
• Tell me that you value my advice.
• Be fair and considerate, as I am.
• Apologize if you have been unthoughtful. It will help me to forgive.
• Gently encourage me to lighten up and to laugh at myself when I get uptight, but hear my worries first.



What I Like About Being a ONE

• being self-disciplined and able to accomplish a great deal
• working hard to make the world a better place
• having high standards and ethics; not compromising myself
• being reasonable, responsible, and dedicated in everything I do
• being able to put facts together, coming to good understandings, and figuring out wise solutions
• being the best I can be and bringing out the best in other people



What's Hard About Being a ONE

• being disappointed with myself or others when my expectations are not met
• feeling burdened by too much responsibility
• thinking that what I do is never good enough
• not being appreciated for what I do for people
• being upset because others aren't trying as hard as I am
• obsessing about what I did or what I should do
• being tense, anxious, and taking things too seriously



ONEs as Children Often

• criticize themselves in anticipation of criticism from others
• refrain from doing things that they think might not come out perfect
• focus on living up to the expectations of their parents and teachers
• are very responsible; may assume the role of parent
• hold back negative emotions ("good children aren't angry")



ONEs as Parents

• teach their children responsibility and strong moral values
• are consistent and fair
• discipline firmly

My father teaches me to be an asshole, to be intolerable towards others, racist, sexist. He teaches me that you can never be happy with something that works if it's not the best. To hate, to yell, to be angry and violent.


Today we had plans to go out and take my permit test, finally. [Yeah, I'm late in the game.] I had all week to study, and he said he wanted to head out around 10-11am. Alright. Well I overslept my alarm, and on top of that slept badly. Woke up feeling like shit and see the time. It's after noon. I go downstairs and ask, "Why couldn't you have woken me up?" Because I over slept. That would have been the courteous thing to do right? Considering me waking up influences his plans as well?

No. I'm an adult. It's my responsibility to get myself out of bed on time. Now see, if I was asking him to wake me up for a job in the morning I'd understand him saying that. It'd be MY job and I would be alone in doing that. But we had plans together and I obviously don't look well. He's apparently incapable of calling my cell phone or even [heaven forbid!] walking up the stairs and knocking on my door? I wish I could have just screamed at him and stood up for myself, but I can't. If I do it'll just spiral into him screaming at me until I cry and threatening to take away my laptop [since he paid for it].

I hate how he treats me, I really wish I could get out of this house.

DO IT NOW


1. Your Name:
2. Age:
3. Single or Taken:
4. Favorite Film:
5. Favorite Song or Album:
6. Favorite Band/Artist:
7. Dirty or Clean:
8. Tattoos and/or Piercings:
9. Do we know each other outside of FA?
10. What's your philosophy on life?
11. Is the bottle half-full or half-empty?
12. Would you keep a secret from me if you thought it was in my best interest?
13. What is your favorite memory of us?
14. What is your favorite guilty pleasure?
15. Tell me one odd/interesting fact about you:
16. You can have three wishes (for yourself, so forget all the 'world peace etc' malarkey) - what are they?
17. Can we get together and make a cake?
18. Which country is your spiritual home?
19. What is your big weakness?
20. Do you think I'm a good person?
21. What was your best/favorite subject at school?
22. Describe your accent:
23. If you could change anything about me, would you?
24. What do you wear to sleep?
25. Trousers or skirts?
26. Cigarettes or alcohol?
27. If I only had one day to live, what would we do together?
28. Will you repost this so I can fill it out for you?

http://www.furaffinity.net/view/3631431

It's gotten so many views and favorites
I just don't understand
I drew it so badly :[




In other news, my laptop is fucking up with more viruses and I'm currently trying to fix that.


is almost to 3k views! Go leave nice comments and stuff.

got a twitter. Show her love.


Have questions/comments for me?
Ask/say them anonymously >>here<< to keep me busy while I currently can't draw or watch shit in Safe Mode. -_-


Good day.

I'm .... home
meh

I went through such a shit-storm of being sick while out in WV but here back at 'home' I'm just really depressed because I want to go back. Those two weeks out there and I felt so fucking at home. And now I'm back here, where my parents are bitching before I even got here, I have one[ish] friend, and a very empty bedroom.

At least my parents' bickering worked out for me this time, and I'm going to finally go get my permit next monday. Yeah, I'm really fucking slow on the whole driving thing, but I'm also not fond of driving.

I really need to work on my commissions. I've been stuck on the second half of Riri's because the lines have been frustrating me to the point of giving up, but I need the money.


I'm so tired. Seeing Proserpine on my MSN list and not just across the room while I'm on my laptop is... aggravating, depressing, etc etc etc.





I don't like this.

lol

um yea
I'm still with Proserpine [for another week?]
I'm all doped up on medicines and stuff
Disoriented etc etc
I had a pretty nasty infection yup yup

The room looks relly werid just now
ummmmmmmmmmmmmm

but I'll be okay
just no art for a while sorry?

I taught prosie how to make dolls n stuff though

um yea

I'm staying with Proserpine for a week, so I'll be sorta not around.

Busy buttsecksing

kthnxkupo

1. Who eats more?
Pros I guess, I rarely remember to eat in the first place XD

2. Who said “I love you” first?
Pros did

3. Who is the morning person?
I kind of am. Given the opportunity Pros would probably sleep all day lol

4. Who sings better?
That's debatable. I haven't heard Pros sing a LOT, but I'm not much competition to anyone.

5. Who’s older?
Prossssss is a peeeeeeedo [loljk]

6. Who’s smarter?
It totally depends on the subject.

7. Whose temper is worse?
Mine ._.

8. Who does the laundry?
Pft, Pros would.

9. Who does the dishes?.
I guess I can handle that. By hand, sure. But I have no idea how to work a dishwasher machine...

10. Who sleeps on what side of the bed?
Whatever sides we crash on after our vicious sexxings

11. Whose feet are bigger?
Pros's. I have tiny feets.

12. Whose hair is longer?
Prosie's

13. Who’s better with the computer?
Possibly me lol.

14. Do you have pets?
We have miiiiiiccceee

15. Who pays the bills?
lol

16. Who cooks dinner?
Pros. I would burn the house down otherwise

17. Who drives when you are together?
Pros because I can't drive ._.

18. Who pays when you go out to dinner?
We usually pay for ourselves XD

19. Who’s the most stubborn?
Both of us. XD It's insane

20. Who is the first one to admit when they’re wrong?
I guess it depends?

21. Whose family do you see more?
Ummm. Well when we're together usually Pros's family since we don't stay here very long during visits.

22. Who named your pet?
I DID

23. Who kissed who first?
I think ironically we both planned to do it at the same time.

24. Who asked who out?
lol

25. What did you do on your first date?
We haven't even been on a date.... unless you count Walmart. Holy fuck that's romantic.

26. Who’s more sensitive?
idk XD

27. Who’s taller?
Pros makes me short

28. Who has more friends?
lol idk. Maybe Pros since I have pretty strict standards for 'friends'. I have a fuck ton of acquaintances though.

29. Who has more siblings?
Pros has 2 brothers, I have 1.

30. Who wears the pants in the relationship?
I do. Hands down. Fer sure. Srsly.

Look up your answer on urban dictionary and add it in.

1.Your name?
Loth
Very cool person who likes to rape people
[OMFG WTF LOL it's from fucking 2005????]


2. Your age?
18
The age where an American can:
1. Legally buy pornography
2. Legally buy cigarettes
3. Legally gamble in Indian Casinos
4. Legally be concidered an adult
5. Be tried as an adult in a court of law
6. Be drafted for a war they don't believe in
... but still cannot buy alcohol.


3. One of your friends? ( I'm putting two )
Nion
John Settino; elite h4x0r; php mastah; teh s3x

Katie
A happy person who is a good listener and reliable friend. Likes to party and is always there when you need her
[These are both insanely accurate]



4. What should you be doing?
Drawing
Taking words and images in your mind and dumping them onto paper (paper that may be lucky or piteous).


5. Favorite color?
Silver
It's All Good; Everything is all good.

6. Birthplace?
Maryland
I'm from Maryland. We're not from the South, nor do we have an accent. We're also not New England, we're the Mid Atlantic. It's soda, not pop. It's a sub, not a hoagie. It's the beach not the shore and we drink water not "Wooder". It's acceptable to say "where y'all goin?" in short of "where are you going?" It's pizza not pie. It's DC not Washington. We know what bad traffic really looks like, how to use a traffic circle, and how to pump our own gas. We know what and where the Naval Academy is. It's not unusual to eat at a resturant with no shirts, no shoes, and your boat parked out front. We love crabs, corn, and beer. There is no place like it.


7. Month of your birth?
August
The idea of perfection. The 8th Month of the year in certain European and Asian cultures signifies greatness in achieving perfection, or something close to it.


8. last person you talked to?
TJ
tiny junk: a super small penis.


9. One of your nicknames?
Law
Another name for the cops

I wish I didn't hold myself back so much
And I wish the things that are so wrong with me didn't hold me back either
If I could just move in with Pros, we wouldn't get into fights like this where it goes on forever where Pros won't talk to me
But I can't yet because I can't support myself yet
Now I'm sitting here pissed off, confused, sick, scared and upset
Eating this shit that's making the nausea worse because I feel like puking and I hate always feeling like vomiting and never being able to
My texting is down because the server is fucked up
I hate these fights
I hate other people
I wish we could just live together so we could be happier finally

and it is so fucking difficult to use
the appearance-editing is laggy and/or doesn't work most of the time
And it's confusing
But I hate tutorials
I'm about to just delete the fucking thing, I've been tinkering with it for over a few hours
ugg
frustration