I’m very sad right now because I heard the news from my mom today to say to me and she didn’t told me until now and I didn’t really know about this either but mom found out my cat tuna had disappeared in the forest without a trace since February 26 and was never seen again, my mom told me he was extremely sick for a extremely long time and he wasn’t getting any better at all and he ran into the woods as the result. my mom kept looking and looking for him but they could not find him. My mom told me he’s presumed dead. I really want to find him and I want to see him a love again and I want to find him and I want the others to find him too help and I really want to take him to the veterinarian and have him be happy and healthy and playful again. I also want this to be on the lost and found page and he was last seen at my moms house. The reward is $100 if anyone finds him :(

Today I have found out from my grandmother today and she told me that her brother (my uncle) has sadly past away from a disease that infected his brain and nerves. :( I tried to talk to grandma numerous times and she was in town near where I am but she didn’t answer her phone until she told me this. I’m very sad and I never got to meet him and I really wished that I got to meet him more. :( it makes my wanna cry. I will dearly miss him :(.......

Happy New Year’s Eve and happy new year today, I hope you guys had a wonderful year and holidays yesterday and looking forward to our new year this year, it’s gonna be exciting and a happy and fun adventure ahead this year with new things and such. :)

Merry Christmas and happy holidays, I hope you guys have a wonderful time opening Christmas presents and having fun at Christmas parties and other Christmas celebrations, hope you guys have a good day today. :)

It’s chrit Eve today, I hope you all have a wonderful Christmas holiday and spirits this year too with parties and presents to open and other fun activities for Christmas. Merry Christmas too :)

Happy thanksgiving, I hope you guys are having a wonderful time with your friends and family of love ones and having a nice big dinner with turkey, ham, stuffing, sweet potatoes, mashed potatoes, salad, and other stuff, I hope you guys have a wonderful time on thanksgiving :)

I have been feeling really sad about Veterans Day because it is the 100 year anniversary of the ending of World War I, I have been thinking about it for a while too and it was one of those times where one tiny incident and it became a total world conflict and didn’t solve anything and it was one of those times nothing was solved at all and made matters worse and sadly there are no more soldiers from a World War I still with us anymore but all of them are peacefully in heaven searching for peace in another world and they will be with us there forever, always remember this and have a nice Veterans Day and honor our soldiers but not just ours, but both sides as well.

Happy Halloween :) I hope you all have a fun and scary time for Halloween and scaring others to trick or treat some candy :) spooky time is here :)

Sings *Happy birthday to me, happy birthday to me, happy birthday dear me, happy birthday to me.* yay today is my birthday and I hope you all wish me a very happy birthday to meeeeeeee today :) it’s a very wonderful time for me too and I feel happy and young too. :) I also would like some kisses and hugs too and give me presents and food and a birthday party and other things to. :)

I have lately been feeling very stressed out and scared about myself lately, I have been feeling heart ache and pains and chest pains and I have been crying a lot right now because I want to be able to live young forever and never die and I am feeling extremely scared about what will happen to humans in the future because it keep reading and it causing me extreme scared and anxiety about they will become extinct someday and earth will be engulfed by the sun when the sun dies and the universe as well. I don’t want humans go extinct at all, I want them to live forever and reach out to the universe and beyond the edge of the universe and I want to be able to live young forever and I feeling extremely scared of dying and I don’t know what will happen after I die or so and I don’t want these events in the future happen after I die, :( I really need a hug please and I want somebody create a medicine that will make people live young forever and not die with a happy life :( I need a hug please:( *cry cry cry cry cry*

Also I’m having my birthday tomorrow *sings happy birthday to me, happy birthday to me, happy birthday dear meeee, happy birthday to me*

I have very sad news today, I have been going through a lot and I have been very sad, upset, and angry lately and feel like I’m becoming a different person lately, I have been quiet lately because one of my old Doberman dogs who was 12 years old was put down and died today, she had a tumor inside her, she was getting weaker and weaker each time, every time she ate, she was becoming more and more of a skeleton and she was becoming unable to walk at all anymore, and I’m feeling really..... really... re... sad right now that she has died *sobs sobs sobs* I knew her all my life and now she is gone forever. I feel scared too, I really need soft comfort right now and makes me feel scared of death *cry cry cry cry cry cry cry cry cry cry cry cry cry cry cry cry cry cry cry cry cry cry cry cry cry cry cry cry cry cry cry cry cry cry cry cry cry cry cry cry cry cry cry cry* somebody please hug me cry *tears coming down as I sobs and cry with a puddle of tears with broken heart*

Happy New Years, I hope you guys had a wonderful year and wonderful holidays and wonderful Christmas. :)

Merry Christmas. I hope you guys have a wonderful time over the holidays with happy presents and more fun stuff to do for Christmas.

Have great news. I have finally found my wallet that I had lost yesterday, I finally remembered where it was I’m so happy again :)

I’m having a very bad day because t my wallet multiple times and found it but this one is very serious. I was onn a carriage ride in another town last night for fun. I had my wallet with me and I had taken my wallet with debit card credit card and a lot of $20 with me and I put it in the hous when I got home from that ride. Now all the sudden my wallet with debit credit and cash are now disappeared without a trace-, I looked everywhere and multiple people looked everywhere but nothing came up at all and we had to called it off. t’s gone forever . I’m actually extremely crying right now. now *cry cry cry cry cry cry cry cry cry*

Happy Halloween friends, I’m excited for it and also I hope your looking forward for Halloween parties with yummy food and candies, trick or treating and maybe be have fun being scared by others with costumes for Halloween and maybe watch horror films to be scared and have fun for Halloween, happy Halloween.

I am having a very bad terrible night right nowbecause I was texting to a friend who I know for a very long time and he loves me as a brother no matter what, we usually talk for a long time. But then tonight I was talking to him. My dad was giving me a funny look and he started to get mad at me because I was talking to him and he started making me feel very upset and uncomfortable and My dad thinks he’s a men’s stranger who wants to hurt me or do bad stuff with me. I tried to tell him but he was still mad. I got very defensive defensive, and then after that. I was texting him like normal. Then my dad was then like, “tell him goodnight, you don’t seem to care about me tonight” I tried to explain but then he shut me down with a “goodnight have a good time talking to you friend”. But he said it in a mean and disrespectful. After that I ran up and tried to tell my friend what happened and I started crying a lot and told him what happened. I am crying a lot right now, I have a puddle of tears right now and me and my heart feels very sad, broken, crying, unsafe. Somebody please hug me and comfort me please. I will have very sad and terrible dreams tonight. *cries, cries, cries, cries, cries, cries, cries, cries, cries, cries, cries, cries, cries, cries, cries, cries, cries, cries, cries, cries, cries, cries, cries, cries, cries, cries, cries, cries, cries, cries, cries,

Happy birthday to me, happy birthday to me, happy birthday dear me, happy birthday to me *sings* yay I had a very fun birthday Hawaii trip for my birthday and my actual birthday was October 2 yummy food and fun in the ocean with turtles and fish *sings with happiness *

I am having a very bad trip in Hawaii right now because my new house in Hawaii looks like a awful disaster and never got done and I did something completely stupid at a dinner restaurant and I have been a very depressed person lately and thinks that I have no more life. I also have thoughts of doing drugs and killing myself and I have been very sad in the inside and always angry in the inside and screaming to myself that I should hurt myself with no more love and care. There even days that I want to be killed off or starve to death like as if I was in the holocaust. I need to seek out help please and I need help please. I feel very lost in life and don't even know what to even do with it.

*cries* *cries* *cries* *cries* *cries* *cries* *cries* *cries* *cries* *cries* *cries* *cries* please hug me *cries* *cries* I would also want get well pokemon artwork please to cheer me up *hugs*

I am having a very bad trip in Hawaii right now because my new house in Hawaii looks like a awful disaster and never got done and I did something completely stupid at a dinner restaurant and I have been a very depressed person lately and thinks that I have no more life. I also have thoughts of doing drugs and killing myself and I have been very sad in the inside and always angry in the inside and screaming to myself that I should hurt myself with no more love and care. I need to seek out help please.

*cries* *cries* *cries* *cries* *cries* *cries* *cries* *cries* *cries* *cries* *cries* *cries*

I am very happy that I have finally graduated from high school back in June 9 this year. I forgot to post this journal since then but I am very happy that I am doing this now :) it was a very big accomplishment and now I get to choose my own path.

I am really sad today and still sad for weeks now because one of my beloved uncles has passed away recently and I am really crying right now and I really loved him and wished I got to see him more. It makes me feel very scared of death and I really want a hug *cry* *cry* *cry* *cry* *cry* *cry* *cry* *cry*

I Am having a very bad day today because I was giving a a presentation for school called a defense of learning which a thing on what have you learned as a learner as you completed the assignment and it is a very hard presentation and I have to have a 9 I order to pass and the maximum of 12. I typed of my presentation as best I can and then whe. I was presenting. My teacher stopped me at the middle at my presentation that I did not meet all the requirements that for my presentation. But I tried my very hardest to do it and now I have to think about my learning super hard which is so impossible to do. And then after the teacher stopped me that I didn't have all the requirements, I absolutely failed the presentation and no one else graded me. When I went home I absolutely screamed out the F word so many times I started slamming doors so hard and absolutely throwing my school stuff so hard at my dogs that they started limping and blood was dripping and it left blood marks on the floor and I screamed at the dogs so loud and hard that it made them scared for a very long time. I also wrote stuff on my arms that are very nasty, very painful, and very tragic like I should absolutely break my arm and so much that I never heals and get a fractured broken skull, and also killing myself. I even also said on my arm that I should start doing smoking like weed, vapor, dope, marijuana, and cigarettes. I also felt very sad that I wrote all these stuff on my arms and physically hurting my own pets until blood was coming out and it is making me cry and I shouldn't of done this and I am very sorry and this is the worst day of my life. :(....

I am having the worst day of my life today because my finals are coming up soon in a few weeks and aa lot of my projects are due in a few days and I feel very lost and my stress level is super high and it actually got so high that I smashed my phone into pieces and smashed my favorite headphones into pieces and I feel very sad and I also wanted to say I was going to break my arm and hurt myself very badly and called myself stupid and cannot help control my stress level and I need a lot of help. I feel very sorry that I did it and my heart feels very broken. *cries* *cries* *cries* *cries* *cries* *cries* *cries* *cries* *cries* *cries* *cries* *cries* *cries* *cries* *cries* *cries* *cries* *cries* *cries* *cries* *cries* *cries*

Happy birthday to me, happy birthday to me, happy birthday dear lugia, happy birthday to me. :)