Got a new computer and started to go through all of my web browsers and such. I forgot that Furaffinity existed. So I decided to log into it for the first time and damn, I had a lot of stuff to go through. It was a blast from the past things that I used to. I do want to get more art, but that's when I can afford it since it's been a thing about money for years. But I'm sure that I'm not the only one.

So simple update: Still married. xD I'm glad too because we were in a rough patch sometime ago when I was in the hospital for a month. But when I came home, we decided that we were going to make it work. Two years later and we're still working hard and giving each other a boost on days that we feel down.

I still work with seniors. It's a job that I do enjoy, but I like working with people with disabilities a lot more. It gives me more energy and I enjoy giving them a fulfilling life that they deserve.

Turned 30. It's been a landmark because I didn't think I would live past 25 but here I am! Going to turn 31 this year. I feel odd aging a bit. There are somethings that I'm not able to do anymore, but there are things I can still do (Can you believe how flexible I still am? Been stretching for weeks now and damn, it feels good). I'm going to continue to do low impact exercises so that it's easier on my dang knees.

Let's see, anything else? Not much really. Just going through life like everyone else.
Hopefully your life is good ya'll. <3

Rotated jobs like a hamster wheel. Kinda irritating. I'm hoping that this one fits.
Um, poor as fuck. Not poverty but enough to stress you out that you throw up a lot due to the stress.
Been thinking about removing my uterus. My periods have been a pain for about a year. The last few months I bled so much that I constantly felt exhausted. Got an IUD and hoping that it'll help. I'll see what my options are when I take it out (5 years).

Been married for about two years. Hell, people weren't kidding about marriage testing your relationship.
My husband and I had some disagreements but after them, we sort it out.
I really did a great choice. <3

If I could change one thing in my life, it would be that I wished I could've convinced my mom to let me work at an early age. I don't know if would make a difference with how I see money, but it would've been nice to see how that would work out.

I'm done complaining.

Yay, been off and on FA and mostly MIA through some of my social media sites. A lot happened since the last journal update. Too many deaths in the family. Been trying to keep myself sane between working two jobs.

I'm planning on moving to a new home next month. At least I'm hoping. It's a new start that I crave right now. It would be great for both my husband and I. He's been going through so much that I want to give him a new start. Give him a great life that he deserves. And that's the plan. I'm working my ass off to make it happen, but it will be totally worth it in the end. <3

I've been having a difficult few months. To the point that I didn't feel like functioning as a human being. Since then, I've been trying to look for a therapist for myself that's the right fit and would help me through these issues.

I feel like after my first breakdown, my mind has been trying to catch up with me as I age. I turned 27 this year, but I still feel like I'm in my early twenties trying to figure out what I wanna do in life. I know what I want to do, I want to have a stable job, a nice house with my husband and our animals, and just have a place to feel comfortable and to be me without any judgements.

Living with MIL has been a trial. With the first year with her boyfriend passing, we've been essentially her support since then, but after close to three years, I feel like it's some for us to move on. And it would be better for her if we did move on so she could actually focus on something else and do something in her life instead of dwelling on the past. There's that and she's made some poor decisions that we have no control of. And it's getting to the point where my husband is actively frustrated with this. He never tells me until he pops, but I can see it in his eyes and the way he moves when we're in the house. He's tired of being an emotional support and I want to be his rock this time around.

I'm working seven days a week. I have to. I don't want to, but saving up money is my goal right now. I want to get out of this house for both of our sanity and to be able to actually function as an adult instead of being under scrutiny every day over some dumb things and essentially being a maid for the whole household.

You'd think people that were 40+ years old would know how to clean dishes, right? But that's not the case. I've blabbed this on to everyone, but that's how tiring it is. Coming home every afternoon to see the sink full of the dishes. You either decide if you want to clean or have to clean because there isn't any utensils to use. There are days where I don't even bother because, I work. I don't want to clean dishes that aren't even mine. But it's fucking frustrating when you want to cook a great meal for your husband, but you can't do that because everything you want to use is either missing or in the sink.

Towels and stuff that I bought or have been given to by my mother has been ruined with bleach and such. Not even a simple, 'Sorry, that was an accident'. Most of the time, it's , "I don't even know why you're getting upset over a towel". Well, because I would never do this to your things. I respect you. It seems like she has zero respect for me and for my husband.

She lost house and car keys. All she could muster was, 'Oops'. And was essentially talking down to my husband about how he shouldn't be this upset because she lost his keys. He has every right to. Especially when she was moving his car to let her "live in fuck buddy" move his truck in his spot where her fuck buddy had bought a boat instead of using his money to spay his dogs because they are out of control. Ripping the fence apart, destroying furniture, etc. Instead of giving him the resources and shit to get this done, she lets him get away with it.

If it was our dog doing this, she would give us hell over it.

Just tired, man.
So I'm working my ass off to get out of this place.
I want to keep my sanity.
I just hope my mental health won't fuck me up this time around.

I don't really want to go into specifics of what has happened the last 6 months since I've been on here since it took 6 months to get me back to where I am now, but the biggest news is that I'm engaged. <3

It was a talk that my fiance and I had for months and during the 6 months of recent events and such, we decided to get hitched. <3 When? I don't fucking know, lol
I don't have enough money for a wedding, atm and plans that I had prior to these events had been thrown out of the window due to the events that transpired.
So we're gonna be engaged forever, but it's okay, I'm honestly fine with that. I was looking at wedding plans and holy shit. Overwhelming. Gonna ask some friends on how they got their wedding together. Or could say fuck it and do a hella sweet backyard wedding.

Any who, I'm alive. I'm okay. Hoping to remain that way. <3

Porn's never disappointed me, lol
I wanna get more NSFW images of Luxi and perhaps Sasha.

Maybe soooooon ~ :3

Things can happen so quickly that you are unable to turn back time. With what happened in Orlando, Florida over the last weekend, it's a constant reminder to remember to tell the ones you love that you love them with all of your heart. Make it known to them whether it be through hugs, kisses, texts, whatever. Let them know that you love them.

Soon! I'll be moving out of my apartment!

As odd as this sounds, I'm going to be moving in with my boyfriend and his mother. We need to start saving up for another place and where we're currently living, it's not possible.

There's that, but I'm in much need for a mental vacation. My job tends to be too much emotionally when you're dealing with people with both mental health and substance abuse. And with the most recent events at my work, I've been pining for a vacation. I'm going to talk to my psychiatrist to see if that's possible to make that for the future. It's a huge maybe since I want to have money saved up for my car, vacation to New Orleans, new place (possibly looking into a house, but that may be a no go. DD': ) and I do have a bit of debt that I need to settle. It's not too much, but the fact I know it's there is what annoys me.

Another thing I'm hoping is to obtain more art of my characters. That's going to be most likely when I know what I have left after putting money aside, paying bills, and settling debts. It's worth saving up for too if I have to. That's what I did with my current batch of arts!

But yeah, I have about 2 months left here, packing up my stuffs, and moving them to the house.

Oh yes, I picked up drawing again. I realized that it was really cathartic, especially when I'm drawing for myself and no one else. I'm practicing basic things like eyes, mouths, etc. I figured that it would be a good place to start if I plan to draw my fursona and adopts in the future. ;3

Enough of my ramblings, thank you for reading. <3
Have a good day!

...have no money for it.

I've been having the con itch for a while, but I can't really satisfy it until maybe after August. ;w;

I move out in July and I need about a month to recover some costs and such.
It sucks, but oh wellll.

Maybe in the future when I have the year of living at my MIL's house.
x3;

Not much. xD

I'm still working. I have an additional day of work due to finacial reasons so I don't get to go play as often. :c
But that's okay. I get to move out of this stupid apartment in July and go live with my boyfriend's mom (AND PAY LOWER RENT OMGYESH)

Still have odd medical issues. Decided to go back to my old medical office because Kaiser apparently hates me.

Still seeing my therapist if my work schedule isn't too weird.
I'm trying to open up to her, but it's hard when someone asks you about your sex life (My libido is weird. :c)

UMMMMMM.
Maybe going back to school if that's an option, we'll see. <3

Going on vacation next week to Nevada! I'm pretty stoked about that because I've needed one with my boyfriend for a while. It's going to be our first one together before we save up for our big New Orleans trip in 2017 (After Mardi gras, lol)

Not much else. :3 Still trying to commission people if money is possible! Answering notes is still bad but over the last...month work has been something else (It's funny when the police knows you by your voice by now, lmao)

But I'm alive and still sexy. <3

**OH YEAH FORGOT TO MENTION. I've been playing the shit out of Fire Emblem Birthright. Like, 60 hours already put into it. And that's just from playing it at work when it's not chaotic, lol I love this game. And at least I have more husband options in this one then Awakening. I wanted to make a harem honestly because I couldn't choose. x3 <3

Just a few days ago, my boyfriend and I had our first anniversary. And it was amazing. To be honest, it was just overwhelming because I was paranoid the whole entire way through we would never make it to the first, but we did and he has pretty much made me feel like we are going to be together for a long time. <3 He has been my rock throughout the whole entire year when I was dealing with my depression and financial situation. He never gave up on me and gave me hope. I'm glad that I have met him because my friends absolutely love him and feel that he is the greatest thing to ever come into my life. His friends are amazing too not only treating me like I am apart of this big family, but also telling me that I have been the best thing to come into his life after a messy break up that left him unable to become open with me the first few months. But after that, he let me into his life and I let him into mine. In a way, we're kinda living together, but almost not (I am planning to move out of my house at least before October with one of my friends near his place). And it relaxes me to be there because it is teaching me how to truly function like an adult instead of being coped up in my room all day and being depressed.

He has changed my life truly for the better. <3

http://www.furaffinity.net/journal/3516762/

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