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A DIAGNOSIS!!!
Posted 10 years agoAfter every expensive test under the sun, I have a diagnosis: "thunderclap headaches"
There are two kinds, those that happen right before you die because of bleeding on the brain, and those that are spaced out over long periods due to a neurological condition or latent symptom of a brain injury.
Back in college I experienced a week of headaches that swept on so quickly I passed out from pain where I stood. I had an MRI, EEG, sleep study... all sorts of tests, to no end. Same this time, with all diagnostic meds for migraines given as well. As the exact 1-5 minute onset of level 9-10 pain that petered of after a week or two happened both times, several years apart, and no headaches happen of any severity ever... that along with perfect tests and X-ray confirmation of at least four skulls fractures from childhood, and multiple grey areas of dead tissue from brain trauma confirm the diagnosis.
There is no treatment, there are drugs to mildly mitigate pain. All of those meds are anti-inflammatory in nature, and as an anemic stand the small risk of making me bleed out. So, I have a confirmed diagnosis that I lived with multiple skull fractures as a child yet CPS returned me to my parents. My mother's severe abuse has caused latent neurological issues, and those issues can sweep on at any time for the remainder of my life, faster than I can pull over a car. I will have to spend up to two weeks wracked with pain, unable to minimize it, screaming and seeing stars and existing in a ball of agony, as just took place this past week and a half, and before in college. This my the reality for the rest of my life: untreatable agony without any warning whatsoever, coming on within seconds and stealing weeks away from me, all caused by heavy child abuse.
Fuck you, Kimberly Ann Sawyer, and the wildly abetting Erik James Sawyer. I still hold out hope that your children are taken away for their safety, and I look forward to dancing on your graves. I say this without irony, but with absolute seriousness, as I will hold a party the day each of you passes on to hell.
Anyone who wants to chastise or wax theological over the last part, stow it. Anyone who wants information, here is the Mayo Clinic link: http://www.mayoclinic.org/…/…/b.....n/con-20025335
There are two kinds, those that happen right before you die because of bleeding on the brain, and those that are spaced out over long periods due to a neurological condition or latent symptom of a brain injury.
Back in college I experienced a week of headaches that swept on so quickly I passed out from pain where I stood. I had an MRI, EEG, sleep study... all sorts of tests, to no end. Same this time, with all diagnostic meds for migraines given as well. As the exact 1-5 minute onset of level 9-10 pain that petered of after a week or two happened both times, several years apart, and no headaches happen of any severity ever... that along with perfect tests and X-ray confirmation of at least four skulls fractures from childhood, and multiple grey areas of dead tissue from brain trauma confirm the diagnosis.
There is no treatment, there are drugs to mildly mitigate pain. All of those meds are anti-inflammatory in nature, and as an anemic stand the small risk of making me bleed out. So, I have a confirmed diagnosis that I lived with multiple skull fractures as a child yet CPS returned me to my parents. My mother's severe abuse has caused latent neurological issues, and those issues can sweep on at any time for the remainder of my life, faster than I can pull over a car. I will have to spend up to two weeks wracked with pain, unable to minimize it, screaming and seeing stars and existing in a ball of agony, as just took place this past week and a half, and before in college. This my the reality for the rest of my life: untreatable agony without any warning whatsoever, coming on within seconds and stealing weeks away from me, all caused by heavy child abuse.
Fuck you, Kimberly Ann Sawyer, and the wildly abetting Erik James Sawyer. I still hold out hope that your children are taken away for their safety, and I look forward to dancing on your graves. I say this without irony, but with absolute seriousness, as I will hold a party the day each of you passes on to hell.
Anyone who wants to chastise or wax theological over the last part, stow it. Anyone who wants information, here is the Mayo Clinic link: http://www.mayoclinic.org/…/…/b.....n/con-20025335
Pain meds suck! And art update...
Posted 10 years agoAnyone looking for art updates... I'm quite high. Notably high. I don't like these stupid meds and when I try to stop taking them the headache returns so rapidly I keep checking for blood coming out my ears. I am doing art, but it's slightly fuzzy and colors are overly interesting right now, plus my lines seem to be... inventive.
Doing digital stuff currently since I can ctrl-Z and fix these unique failures, and zoom in so focusing isn't so hard.
Doing digital stuff currently since I can ctrl-Z and fix these unique failures, and zoom in so focusing isn't so hard.
Illness Update
Posted 10 years agoUPDATE: I'm on pain meds so I can try to work. Tried the diagnostic meds for migraines and they did nothing, so my doctor is pretty sure that isn't it.
I requested testing for all felines related diseases, even uncommon ones, that show normal CTs but can present with these symptoms in synchronicity. He was happy to oblige. Since we continue to get negative results, I'm being referred to a neurologist. It might be all in my head, which would be simultaneously a relief and further worry.
I requested testing for all felines related diseases, even uncommon ones, that show normal CTs but can present with these symptoms in synchronicity. He was happy to oblige. Since we continue to get negative results, I'm being referred to a neurologist. It might be all in my head, which would be simultaneously a relief and further worry.
Emergency Room
Posted 10 years agoI got my Master to post about this on Facebook, but he didn't post on here.
We rushed to the ER last night. I have no clue, I have had increasingly painful abdominal pain and headaches so bad I see stars. These have been alleviated by heavy ibuprofen, how I made FangCon happen for a single day. It's reached a 9 on the pain scale today, and my 10 is a two-man lead pipe beating. It's excruciating. I'm on 1800 ibuprofen and it has brought it to a 7.
Oh! While at the ER I had a respiratory reaction to latex.
Anyway, all three CT scans were perfect, blood perfect, urine fine. Good and awful news, because I still have no explanation for the excruciating pain.
At the general practitioner I've been having a shitload of testing done, to figure out why my body has been acting bizarrely for a year and a half, recent pain not included:
• Hormonal testing came back fine
• Blood pressure is literally perfect
• Common blood screening came back normal
• My pee is perfect
• My ongoing weight loss isn't a factor and my current weight isn't an issue whatsoever
• All three pelvic ultrasounds (abdominal side, abdominal side, and internal) came back showing a "uncommonly healthy uterus"
• Biopsy of the tiny internal nodule came back normal
I don't have PCOS, a thyroid issue, ectopic pregnancy, or any of the other initial assumptions. This is great news, and awful news. What is wrong with me??? We are on to parasite and neurological testing, and I get the exciting task of "shopping" the appropriate practitioners for such.
Fact of the day: People with anemia should avoid Ibuprofen, because it has the chance of making you bleed out. (Not what happened, but something I NEVER knew and learned tonight.)
We rushed to the ER last night. I have no clue, I have had increasingly painful abdominal pain and headaches so bad I see stars. These have been alleviated by heavy ibuprofen, how I made FangCon happen for a single day. It's reached a 9 on the pain scale today, and my 10 is a two-man lead pipe beating. It's excruciating. I'm on 1800 ibuprofen and it has brought it to a 7.
Oh! While at the ER I had a respiratory reaction to latex.
Anyway, all three CT scans were perfect, blood perfect, urine fine. Good and awful news, because I still have no explanation for the excruciating pain.
At the general practitioner I've been having a shitload of testing done, to figure out why my body has been acting bizarrely for a year and a half, recent pain not included:
• Hormonal testing came back fine
• Blood pressure is literally perfect
• Common blood screening came back normal
• My pee is perfect
• My ongoing weight loss isn't a factor and my current weight isn't an issue whatsoever
• All three pelvic ultrasounds (abdominal side, abdominal side, and internal) came back showing a "uncommonly healthy uterus"
• Biopsy of the tiny internal nodule came back normal
I don't have PCOS, a thyroid issue, ectopic pregnancy, or any of the other initial assumptions. This is great news, and awful news. What is wrong with me??? We are on to parasite and neurological testing, and I get the exciting task of "shopping" the appropriate practitioners for such.
Fact of the day: People with anemia should avoid Ibuprofen, because it has the chance of making you bleed out. (Not what happened, but something I NEVER knew and learned tonight.)
Tattoo Streaming Live!
Posted 10 years agoTonight, right now, I am getting a massively geeky tattoo HUGE on my arm...
Barsoom, the word for the planet Mars from the 1912 scifi series by the famous Edgar Rice Burroughs, is going on my arm. It will be fully colored, with geographically accurate Mars features, markers for the series cities, and entirely accurate longitude and latitude lines.
Wanna watch LIVE TATTOOING?!
The link is: https://www.periscope.tv/w/aPrLzDFl.....gMVqzNh9i2gDtJ
Also being streamed on the Periscope app (which is free) under the title: Barsoom/Mars Tattoo
Barsoom, the word for the planet Mars from the 1912 scifi series by the famous Edgar Rice Burroughs, is going on my arm. It will be fully colored, with geographically accurate Mars features, markers for the series cities, and entirely accurate longitude and latitude lines.
Wanna watch LIVE TATTOOING?!
The link is: https://www.periscope.tv/w/aPrLzDFl.....gMVqzNh9i2gDtJ
Also being streamed on the Periscope app (which is free) under the title: Barsoom/Mars Tattoo
OMG ONCE IN A LIFETIME STREAM!
Posted 10 years agoANNOUNCEMENT: Tomorrow at 6:30 artist Jerry Bean will be streaming my latest tattoo live! Would you be interested in watching???
It will be a giant planet of Barsoom (Mars) capping off my galaxy and scifi ship themed left sleeve. It will take 1-2 hours, and we would LOVE for you to watch!
If we get any interest, we will stream my right sleeve cap... the Death Star! I'm so fucking excited!!!
It will be a giant planet of Barsoom (Mars) capping off my galaxy and scifi ship themed left sleeve. It will take 1-2 hours, and we would LOVE for you to watch!
If we get any interest, we will stream my right sleeve cap... the Death Star! I'm so fucking excited!!!
LIVING HELL
Posted 10 years agoThe past two weeks have been an abysmal compilation of stressors reaching back through the summer. I've been on track, uploading backlogged images like crazy, as most of you have noticed. Well, the past few weeks put that on hardcore hold. What has happened?
- Daughter's biological father pops up for the first time in her life, wanting a relationship with her... and decides he and his father will stay at our house.
- My son's grades come in, half failing. I can't ever know what is the Asperger's, and what is just laziness, but this stress is never-ending.
- My allergy season is here, and I can't afford my allergy meds because his Asperger's treatments are so fucking expensive. I'm sneezing non-stop.
- Three ringworm kittens are found and have to be kept in super quarantine, as they are a health risk to all pets, fosters, and humans. I'm the only one in the agency with the space and facilities to care for them during their two-month treatment, so I have no choice.
- My son uses my computer with his friends and the fucking thing gets a rootkit virus. Wiped again... FML
- An infant kitten (less than a week old) was brought to me, seemingly very healthy. He is, except the raging infection behind his eyelids that has rendered him blind before ever getting a chance to see.
- Three packages I thought had been delivered like a month ago arrive here, having gone to Mexico of all fucking places. There is no way anyone on earth has as many issues as I do with the USPS.
- A horrible litter refuses the litterbox and I am now on constant cleanup after them. It's awful, and they won't be old enough to fix for another month.
- A kitten literally dies from starvation right after I get her... in my arms. There is nothing more heartbreaking.
- I've gone three weeks with barely being able to sit and touch a pen, and there is a con in less than two weeks. I'm terrified.
- I have to get my license in less than a week, and I've never driven. I'm even more terrified.
So... I'm going to upload some art of myself while I sit here at an adoption center praying kind people will take a few of the thirteen kittens I have that are old enough and healthy enough to be adopted. If you are waiting for art, please hush. I know you are waiting, and I am not a machine. I am a person, and this person wants to comfort herself in a horrible time with art she loves.
Thank you everyone. I'm going to post pictures now and then possibly bash my head into the sales rack of dog crates. Fuck you, headache...
- Daughter's biological father pops up for the first time in her life, wanting a relationship with her... and decides he and his father will stay at our house.
- My son's grades come in, half failing. I can't ever know what is the Asperger's, and what is just laziness, but this stress is never-ending.
- My allergy season is here, and I can't afford my allergy meds because his Asperger's treatments are so fucking expensive. I'm sneezing non-stop.
- Three ringworm kittens are found and have to be kept in super quarantine, as they are a health risk to all pets, fosters, and humans. I'm the only one in the agency with the space and facilities to care for them during their two-month treatment, so I have no choice.
- My son uses my computer with his friends and the fucking thing gets a rootkit virus. Wiped again... FML
- An infant kitten (less than a week old) was brought to me, seemingly very healthy. He is, except the raging infection behind his eyelids that has rendered him blind before ever getting a chance to see.
- Three packages I thought had been delivered like a month ago arrive here, having gone to Mexico of all fucking places. There is no way anyone on earth has as many issues as I do with the USPS.
- A horrible litter refuses the litterbox and I am now on constant cleanup after them. It's awful, and they won't be old enough to fix for another month.
- A kitten literally dies from starvation right after I get her... in my arms. There is nothing more heartbreaking.
- I've gone three weeks with barely being able to sit and touch a pen, and there is a con in less than two weeks. I'm terrified.
- I have to get my license in less than a week, and I've never driven. I'm even more terrified.
So... I'm going to upload some art of myself while I sit here at an adoption center praying kind people will take a few of the thirteen kittens I have that are old enough and healthy enough to be adopted. If you are waiting for art, please hush. I know you are waiting, and I am not a machine. I am a person, and this person wants to comfort herself in a horrible time with art she loves.
Thank you everyone. I'm going to post pictures now and then possibly bash my head into the sales rack of dog crates. Fuck you, headache...
I need help figuring it out!
Posted 10 years agoI have begun an art addiction, and I just got my first couple YCHs with others, so I feel like I should make a list of art that I need of myself. (If you don't know my sona, thisis me.)
Please comment any suggestions to add, any of these you'd like to go in on with me (our characters and split cost), or any you think you would be good at doing artistically and want me to commission you:
Lesbian porn (unlimited pieces wanted)
Bukakke (nearly done)
Being beaten (unlimited pieces wanted)
Being furniture
Slave auction block
Sprawled in a tee and nothing else on a couch, eating potato chips
Hiding in pillow fort
Plushie
Car sex
Me as an angel dragon
Concert stage roadie sex
Goo/living latex
Nasty bar bathroom sex
Balloon animal (carnival style)
Acid trip/geometric coloration
In the mirror selfie
Feral/kitten play with cat toys
In window seat reading
Me as a pony
Burlsque/Moulin Rouge style
Me in "taur" form
Artistic nude in nature wrapped in snake
Magazine cover
Magazine fold out porny-mag style
Double penetration
Too small (perhaps a dragon partner?)
Pregnant me on pole
Pregnant me during sex
Feral/kitten playing in box
Pregnant partner during sex
Lolita NOT lolicon (working on, with Ayoka)
Sex w/alien or monster partner
Blowup doll self
Sex w/ futanari partner
Crawling on leash w/ dom
Gore (ritual sacrifice I think)
Dirty in rain, crying alone
Peekaboo in feral/cub form
Being taken by force
Cutaway style cum fill (like in hentai)
Cuddles in the snow
Regular/submissive sex (unlimited pieces wanted)
A "moods" chart by OK
Please help me with this! Comment ANY helpful suggestions!
Please comment any suggestions to add, any of these you'd like to go in on with me (our characters and split cost), or any you think you would be good at doing artistically and want me to commission you:
Lesbian porn (unlimited pieces wanted)
Bukakke (nearly done)
Being beaten (unlimited pieces wanted)
Being furniture
Slave auction block
Sprawled in a tee and nothing else on a couch, eating potato chips
Hiding in pillow fort
Plushie
Car sex
Me as an angel dragon
Concert stage roadie sex
Goo/living latex
Nasty bar bathroom sex
Balloon animal (carnival style)
Acid trip/geometric coloration
In the mirror selfie
Feral/kitten play with cat toys
In window seat reading
Me as a pony
Burlsque/Moulin Rouge style
Me in "taur" form
Artistic nude in nature wrapped in snake
Magazine cover
Magazine fold out porny-mag style
Double penetration
Too small (perhaps a dragon partner?)
Pregnant me on pole
Pregnant me during sex
Feral/kitten playing in box
Pregnant partner during sex
Lolita NOT lolicon (working on, with Ayoka)
Sex w/alien or monster partner
Blowup doll self
Sex w/ futanari partner
Crawling on leash w/ dom
Gore (ritual sacrifice I think)
Dirty in rain, crying alone
Peekaboo in feral/cub form
Being taken by force
Cutaway style cum fill (like in hentai)
Cuddles in the snow
Regular/submissive sex (unlimited pieces wanted)
A "moods" chart by OK
Please help me with this! Comment ANY helpful suggestions!
SO EXCITED!
Posted 10 years agoI made the realization that I could turn a hand drawn badge into something MORE than just a picture of a cut out thing.
Some will have a solid BG, others gradient, and those that it works for might have a mini-scene. I am doing this retroactively to ALL badges, and doing it to all that will be posted.
This will be a permanent policy, though for now I am just playing around with it, and in the future I might make options available.
Some will have a solid BG, others gradient, and those that it works for might have a mini-scene. I am doing this retroactively to ALL badges, and doing it to all that will be posted.
This will be a permanent policy, though for now I am just playing around with it, and in the future I might make options available.
What does this do for you? Any interest?
Posted 10 years agohttp://www.furaffinity.net/view/17781432/
*If this gains any real interest, I will begin posting them. This is a test, I'm curious if the stories in my mind when I sketch out my fantasies would appeal to anyone else.*
This art actually has a mini story, a very personal one that was inspired by my very real life Master, and led to the creation of Lyshastra:
"The nameless girl was torn from her slave mother the day she was old enough to perform all services one could wish. Shoved into a large cage in a room with dozens of other slaves of different ages and genders, they were stripped, hosed down and oiled up for a sexual gleam.
__________
She was terrified but maintained composure at the auction, save for a solitary tear. Nude and freezing, she was gruffly pawed over and inspected by faceless individuals, goose bumps crawling across her oiled skin.
Sound muffled in her swimming ears, she heard things being called out quickly, then slowly, then occasionally. She knew what an auction was, and she wept internally knowing if she fetched a low sum it said something awful about her worth, if she fetched a high sum it boded horribly for her future. Wealthy owners were the cruelest, they could always buy a replacement.
Her bidding was going on longer than anyone else's, and her terror intensified. She tried to console herself with the thought that the higher sum she brought her soon-to-be-previous owner, the more she would bring him repute and the kinder he might be to her mother and sire.
Tears welling up, she forgot the rest of the world until she was barked at and knocked to the ground. Completely confused, she didn't understand she was meant to stand, or where to go. They needed to move to the next slave, so they drug her by her hair into a tiny frigid cage. It was then kicked shut and drug to a loading bay somewhere far from the bidding room.
Looking around her, she saw cages stacked in piles, denoting multiple purchases. The slaves touched fingers through the bars, silently comforting each other's terror. She was all alone and tried to be strong, as they looked on from their cages and pitied her.
What seemed like ages later, she was jarred into reality by the bang of her cage being opened. She was bound at the wrists, had a leash clapped to her pierced nipples, and walked to a beautiful vehicle. Misunderstanding, she went for the door. The man walking her backhanded her to the gravel and cursed her insolence. She was lifted and thrown into the trunk.
____________
The lull of engine and bumps of road had stopped. She was lifted from the car by a collared manservant and set to the ground on her feet. Another man in a collar opened the door of the beautiful car and she for the first time laid eyes on her new Master.
He dismissed the two men to their other duties, grabbed her nipple lead, and stared into her eyes critically. His seasoned face housed amber eyes boasting smile lines, under a brow that knew much forrowing. What sort of face was this? What was the person behind it?
He led her up a stunning stair into a magnificent foyer, sharp yanks to the lead when she was even a half step behind. His long stride was leading to bloodied nipples.
__________
Shutting the heavy doors behind them, he turned to her with a stern face. He unclipped her lead and tossed it aside. She backed away ever so slightly, to his annoyance.
He loosed her wrists and gripped one harshly, bringing more pain than even she was used to. With a fearsome look, he forcefully threw her arm towards the corner so hard that the rest of her was helpless to follow.
She curled into the corner, terrified more than ever in her life, sexually wet with reaction to his strength and the dominance he exuded. As she comforted herself, she heard the clink of a buckle behind her. What was going to happen? Her mother had warned her, but she had never been with a man.
What was going to happen to her? What was this new life going to be??"
*If this gains any real interest, I will begin posting them. This is a test, I'm curious if the stories in my mind when I sketch out my fantasies would appeal to anyone else.*
This art actually has a mini story, a very personal one that was inspired by my very real life Master, and led to the creation of Lyshastra:
"The nameless girl was torn from her slave mother the day she was old enough to perform all services one could wish. Shoved into a large cage in a room with dozens of other slaves of different ages and genders, they were stripped, hosed down and oiled up for a sexual gleam.
__________
She was terrified but maintained composure at the auction, save for a solitary tear. Nude and freezing, she was gruffly pawed over and inspected by faceless individuals, goose bumps crawling across her oiled skin.
Sound muffled in her swimming ears, she heard things being called out quickly, then slowly, then occasionally. She knew what an auction was, and she wept internally knowing if she fetched a low sum it said something awful about her worth, if she fetched a high sum it boded horribly for her future. Wealthy owners were the cruelest, they could always buy a replacement.
Her bidding was going on longer than anyone else's, and her terror intensified. She tried to console herself with the thought that the higher sum she brought her soon-to-be-previous owner, the more she would bring him repute and the kinder he might be to her mother and sire.
Tears welling up, she forgot the rest of the world until she was barked at and knocked to the ground. Completely confused, she didn't understand she was meant to stand, or where to go. They needed to move to the next slave, so they drug her by her hair into a tiny frigid cage. It was then kicked shut and drug to a loading bay somewhere far from the bidding room.
Looking around her, she saw cages stacked in piles, denoting multiple purchases. The slaves touched fingers through the bars, silently comforting each other's terror. She was all alone and tried to be strong, as they looked on from their cages and pitied her.
What seemed like ages later, she was jarred into reality by the bang of her cage being opened. She was bound at the wrists, had a leash clapped to her pierced nipples, and walked to a beautiful vehicle. Misunderstanding, she went for the door. The man walking her backhanded her to the gravel and cursed her insolence. She was lifted and thrown into the trunk.
____________
The lull of engine and bumps of road had stopped. She was lifted from the car by a collared manservant and set to the ground on her feet. Another man in a collar opened the door of the beautiful car and she for the first time laid eyes on her new Master.
He dismissed the two men to their other duties, grabbed her nipple lead, and stared into her eyes critically. His seasoned face housed amber eyes boasting smile lines, under a brow that knew much forrowing. What sort of face was this? What was the person behind it?
He led her up a stunning stair into a magnificent foyer, sharp yanks to the lead when she was even a half step behind. His long stride was leading to bloodied nipples.
__________
Shutting the heavy doors behind them, he turned to her with a stern face. He unclipped her lead and tossed it aside. She backed away ever so slightly, to his annoyance.
He loosed her wrists and gripped one harshly, bringing more pain than even she was used to. With a fearsome look, he forcefully threw her arm towards the corner so hard that the rest of her was helpless to follow.
She curled into the corner, terrified more than ever in her life, sexually wet with reaction to his strength and the dominance he exuded. As she comforted herself, she heard the clink of a buckle behind her. What was going to happen? Her mother had warned her, but she had never been with a man.
What was going to happen to her? What was this new life going to be??"
BEWARE ART SPAM COMING
Posted 10 years agoLike is said yesterday, I am finally in a better mood after having a total breakdown from stress. I spent all day yesterday organizing from my 3TB of shit to go through, pulling out a ton of art and a bunch of recent stuff. I posted a few things of my own sona for taking breaks, to make myself happy.
I'M SORRY ABOUT THE ART SPAM! I'm posting all the shit I've been needing to post for MONTHS, from AC and later. I'm trying to do them chronologically, so bear with me.
I'M SORRY ABOUT THE ART SPAM! I'm posting all the shit I've been needing to post for MONTHS, from AC and later. I'm trying to do them chronologically, so bear with me.
This is happier than I have felt in AGES!
Posted 10 years agoDid I reach a depressive overwhelmed breaking point, snap on a "art should be free" post, and go on an art-buying bender?
No... but if I did it would explain the absolute calm I feel right now. But I totally didn't. *innocent face*
(Side note, buying things CAN make you happy. Don't ever let anyone tell you otherwise, except your wallet. And she is a bitch.)
I still have like 300 images if not more to upload of my art, everything on my page is fairly old. Thinking about this fact isn't making me panic anymore though. And I have like 70 images to upload of Lysh. Some are super simple little badges made by a fan of my sona, but all of them make me smile.
The positive feedback on my posts as I've been putting them up is amazing you guys. That has been what sustains this happy high. I love you.
No... but if I did it would explain the absolute calm I feel right now. But I totally didn't. *innocent face*
(Side note, buying things CAN make you happy. Don't ever let anyone tell you otherwise, except your wallet. And she is a bitch.)
I still have like 300 images if not more to upload of my art, everything on my page is fairly old. Thinking about this fact isn't making me panic anymore though. And I have like 70 images to upload of Lysh. Some are super simple little badges made by a fan of my sona, but all of them make me smile.
The positive feedback on my posts as I've been putting them up is amazing you guys. That has been what sustains this happy high. I love you.
*frustrated crying*
Posted 10 years ago*angry tears*
I will pay someone to come over and work for me posting art on FB, FA, Weasyl, IB, DA, Twitter, Imgur, and Tumblr for me. I HATE tagging. I HATE upload pauses. I HATE thinking up descriptions. And I now have an external drive from my old busted machine that needs to be waded through, sorted, cropped, organized by time stamp, PSed for color accuracy, and the commissioners' links tracked down for posting.
I swear to god, I'd be your art slave, sex slave, whatever the hell you wanted from me. I FUCKING HATE THIS.
I will pay someone to come over and work for me posting art on FB, FA, Weasyl, IB, DA, Twitter, Imgur, and Tumblr for me. I HATE tagging. I HATE upload pauses. I HATE thinking up descriptions. And I now have an external drive from my old busted machine that needs to be waded through, sorted, cropped, organized by time stamp, PSed for color accuracy, and the commissioners' links tracked down for posting.
I swear to god, I'd be your art slave, sex slave, whatever the hell you wanted from me. I FUCKING HATE THIS.
Digital Commission Announcement
Posted 10 years agoDigital commissioners!! I have an announcement!
My computer has been dying slowly and painfully for a few months. My streams have been buggy and odd because of it.
My AMAZING Owner got me a new laptop fort birthday/anniversary gift. It is ten times more powerful than my six year old computer when it was NEW.
So... I will be delaying digital commissions and streams for one week (while it gets here) so you can have the quickest output and smoothest stream as you art comes to life. I promise you will notice the difference, and I am excited to break it in!!!
My computer has been dying slowly and painfully for a few months. My streams have been buggy and odd because of it.
My AMAZING Owner got me a new laptop fort birthday/anniversary gift. It is ten times more powerful than my six year old computer when it was NEW.
So... I will be delaying digital commissions and streams for one week (while it gets here) so you can have the quickest output and smoothest stream as you art comes to life. I promise you will notice the difference, and I am excited to break it in!!!
Free badges! Sale of a lifetime!
Posted 10 years agoEmergency BOGO sale, so get two badges of ANY type and only pay for one!! Add-ons included.
ALL STYLES are buy one get one, mix and match styles and characters!
Please help!!! My prices and examples are here:
http://www.furaffinity.net/journal/6727030/
ALL STYLES are buy one get one, mix and match styles and characters!
Please help!!! My prices and examples are here:
http://www.furaffinity.net/journal/6727030/
Terms of Service
Posted 10 years agoMy thoughts on my artwork: If you are in the mood to work... work! If you want to do big sweeping color, your mood will give better output on flat color. If you are in the mood for fine detailing, use that OCD mood for the best possible output.
I've been asked why I have no official list. Well... friends don't get first priority with me. Commissions are in lump order, I do a bunch of art lines when I am in the mood, a bunch of base color when in the mood, and shading/detail on a bunch when I am in the mood. I try to rush anniversary/holiday/birthday art, so that does get special focus. NSFW is something I can't work on when my kids are home, but I STRONGLY prefer to work on when they are not.
So I have no "commission order list". I likely never will. Some people are shitty at responding to WIPs, and I'm not going to hold up all work because you were before them and aren't replying.
"Will you complete this sketch/Fill in these lines/Use this and finish it?" You mean do I complete a piece with line work brought to me? No, never. I don't trust that it wasn't stolen off the internet, and I won't risk being held responsible. Not to mention, it is stupid to say "I don't trust you to draw, now go draw" and outright rude to ask an artist to shoehorn their style into another artist's.
Respond quickly, that's the only way to ensure the quickest possible turnaround with me. I work with my mood (for better output) and my schedule. If you cannot accept this then we cannot work together. They are simple requests, and I work as fast as I can. Just don't be neglectful of your commission, or an asshole.
I expect all payment up front. Too many times burned by commissioners who couldn't follow through. If you cannot afford it up front, you can't afford art. Maybe later on, but clearly right now isn't the time for you. There are no exceptions to this. Why? Paypal is the only means of payment I accept. If an artist doesn't follow through with the promised product, Paypal will reimburse you and punish them. Nobody reimburses artists who have done all the work for half the pay because the other party didn't follow through.
Do I complete art that is brought to me? No, never. I don't trust that it wasn't stolen, and I won't risk being held responsible. Additionally, I find it nonsensical to say "I don't trust you to draw, but I trust you to draw." And it is outright rude to ask an artist to shoehorn into someone else's style. So no, absolutely not.
My policy on art lost in the mail is this: I have a high res scan of all pieces, though I prefer posting photos online to show scale. If it is lost in the mail, I will print you a new one. Additionally, I make you a new piece, so you aren't just stuck with a print, you also get an original piece.
I think I speak for most artists when I say ASK FOR EDITS! Please! Seriously, we've all gotten art that is "off". I'd rather work at small tweaks to make you happy, versus the alternatives:
1) You have to live with something that you hate, or (arguably worse) bothers you in just a tiny way you are very aware of.
2) You go bitch about us on forums and to friends/strangers about a problem we were totally unaware of because you never told us.
There are those that take asking for edits too far, and there are those who regard their art so highly they refuse to accept a change requested. Then there are the rest of us commissioners and artists.
This entire fandom exists from ideas channeled through gifted hands into reality. As an artist, I am aware of this. I believe any respectable artist is, and any worthwhile commissioner is willing to accept their vision through stylized imagery. There is a middle ground to it all, but by all means, ASK FOR EDITS!
I am delayed at times (kids, kitten fostering, husband, career), but am always highly accessible (https://www.facebook.com/SnowflakeA.....Designs?ref=hl). If you need something, just ask. If you want an update, ask. Just don't pester me, fair?
If anything goes beyond 6 months to put out, I give a full refund, plus your art in whatever stage of completion. THIS WINDOW IS AN EXTREME, most commissions are done inside a month, but there are some hyper detailed reference sheets that take incredible amounts of time, and this is the longest I could ever possibly imagine taking, between work, WIPs, and waiting for communication back for edits.
Doing art I make between 50¢-$3/hour doing art. I do it because I love it, but please don't ruin it for me by being any of these (http://www.furaffinity.net/view/16784916/).
I've been asked why I have no official list. Well... friends don't get first priority with me. Commissions are in lump order, I do a bunch of art lines when I am in the mood, a bunch of base color when in the mood, and shading/detail on a bunch when I am in the mood. I try to rush anniversary/holiday/birthday art, so that does get special focus. NSFW is something I can't work on when my kids are home, but I STRONGLY prefer to work on when they are not.
So I have no "commission order list". I likely never will. Some people are shitty at responding to WIPs, and I'm not going to hold up all work because you were before them and aren't replying.
"Will you complete this sketch/Fill in these lines/Use this and finish it?" You mean do I complete a piece with line work brought to me? No, never. I don't trust that it wasn't stolen off the internet, and I won't risk being held responsible. Not to mention, it is stupid to say "I don't trust you to draw, now go draw" and outright rude to ask an artist to shoehorn their style into another artist's.
Respond quickly, that's the only way to ensure the quickest possible turnaround with me. I work with my mood (for better output) and my schedule. If you cannot accept this then we cannot work together. They are simple requests, and I work as fast as I can. Just don't be neglectful of your commission, or an asshole.
I expect all payment up front. Too many times burned by commissioners who couldn't follow through. If you cannot afford it up front, you can't afford art. Maybe later on, but clearly right now isn't the time for you. There are no exceptions to this. Why? Paypal is the only means of payment I accept. If an artist doesn't follow through with the promised product, Paypal will reimburse you and punish them. Nobody reimburses artists who have done all the work for half the pay because the other party didn't follow through.
Do I complete art that is brought to me? No, never. I don't trust that it wasn't stolen, and I won't risk being held responsible. Additionally, I find it nonsensical to say "I don't trust you to draw, but I trust you to draw." And it is outright rude to ask an artist to shoehorn into someone else's style. So no, absolutely not.
My policy on art lost in the mail is this: I have a high res scan of all pieces, though I prefer posting photos online to show scale. If it is lost in the mail, I will print you a new one. Additionally, I make you a new piece, so you aren't just stuck with a print, you also get an original piece.
I think I speak for most artists when I say ASK FOR EDITS! Please! Seriously, we've all gotten art that is "off". I'd rather work at small tweaks to make you happy, versus the alternatives:
1) You have to live with something that you hate, or (arguably worse) bothers you in just a tiny way you are very aware of.
2) You go bitch about us on forums and to friends/strangers about a problem we were totally unaware of because you never told us.
There are those that take asking for edits too far, and there are those who regard their art so highly they refuse to accept a change requested. Then there are the rest of us commissioners and artists.
This entire fandom exists from ideas channeled through gifted hands into reality. As an artist, I am aware of this. I believe any respectable artist is, and any worthwhile commissioner is willing to accept their vision through stylized imagery. There is a middle ground to it all, but by all means, ASK FOR EDITS!
I am delayed at times (kids, kitten fostering, husband, career), but am always highly accessible (https://www.facebook.com/SnowflakeA.....Designs?ref=hl). If you need something, just ask. If you want an update, ask. Just don't pester me, fair?
If anything goes beyond 6 months to put out, I give a full refund, plus your art in whatever stage of completion. THIS WINDOW IS AN EXTREME, most commissions are done inside a month, but there are some hyper detailed reference sheets that take incredible amounts of time, and this is the longest I could ever possibly imagine taking, between work, WIPs, and waiting for communication back for edits.
Doing art I make between 50¢-$3/hour doing art. I do it because I love it, but please don't ruin it for me by being any of these (http://www.furaffinity.net/view/16784916/).
Artistic Process
Posted 10 years agoSomebody asked about my artistic process on traditional art. Well...
I go through phases of wanting to sketch, so I sketch several commissions.
Then OCD mode and I do meticulous lineart for several commissions.
Then I'll want to color stuff and do everything I've lined up to that point.
So I do commissions in order, mostly. But I follow my interest, as it not only keeps me from getting burnt out on start to finish pieces over and over and over... I also just give better output.
I go through phases of wanting to sketch, so I sketch several commissions.
Then OCD mode and I do meticulous lineart for several commissions.
Then I'll want to color stuff and do everything I've lined up to that point.
So I do commissions in order, mostly. But I follow my interest, as it not only keeps me from getting burnt out on start to finish pieces over and over and over... I also just give better output.
Feeling Upbeat and Making Epic Commission Progress
Posted 10 years agoI've gotten so much done today! I'm just in an amazing mood and accomplishing all sorts of stuff.
Yesterday 11 foster kittens got the healthy all-clear and are out of their respective quarantines, I got the contract of a lifetime and an associated check at a hilarious meeting in a cigar bar, I secured an AMAZING professional client, I got to randomly go out and made it to a pet store right in time to meet the adoptees of my first bottle babies being adopted as a pair, then I got Chibese food with furry friends.
I woke up today feeling great from all that and drank while working, I've gotten SOOOOOOO much done, and I spent all day working on the couch beside my Master, who was on a Mass Effect spree. Expect a lot of posts from me over the next 48 hours, I'm on a ROLL!!!
Yesterday 11 foster kittens got the healthy all-clear and are out of their respective quarantines, I got the contract of a lifetime and an associated check at a hilarious meeting in a cigar bar, I secured an AMAZING professional client, I got to randomly go out and made it to a pet store right in time to meet the adoptees of my first bottle babies being adopted as a pair, then I got Chibese food with furry friends.
I woke up today feeling great from all that and drank while working, I've gotten SOOOOOOO much done, and I spent all day working on the couch beside my Master, who was on a Mass Effect spree. Expect a lot of posts from me over the next 48 hours, I'm on a ROLL!!!
RANT
Posted 10 years agoMy life is my artwork, my children, and the flock of hurt orphaned kittens I foster. I rarely sleep, rarely go out, and when I have down time I try to keep up with the always behind giant house.
I do NOT take art requests. I will, on very rare occasion do a giveaway, but I don't do free art almost ever. I hate that I have to charge at all, I really do, and I price my art incredibly low!!! I make MAYBE $2/hour.
Stop begging, it is pathetic. I understand not having artistic skill, but there are free bases and builders online, bugger off and use them. Don't you DARE presume to take away my precious moments with my children or sick kittens, or insult what I work very hard to do for MAKING MONEY.
Art beggars are disrespectful. Those who try to be coy or supplicating are disrespectful not only in the above ways but also insulting my intelligence. If you beg, I will say once politely that I do not do free art. If you do so again you are blocked, no matter our relationship. There are things far more important to me than you, and even the best of people is disposable in comparison to my children and providing for them.
I do NOT take art requests. I will, on very rare occasion do a giveaway, but I don't do free art almost ever. I hate that I have to charge at all, I really do, and I price my art incredibly low!!! I make MAYBE $2/hour.
Stop begging, it is pathetic. I understand not having artistic skill, but there are free bases and builders online, bugger off and use them. Don't you DARE presume to take away my precious moments with my children or sick kittens, or insult what I work very hard to do for MAKING MONEY.
Art beggars are disrespectful. Those who try to be coy or supplicating are disrespectful not only in the above ways but also insulting my intelligence. If you beg, I will say once politely that I do not do free art. If you do so again you are blocked, no matter our relationship. There are things far more important to me than you, and even the best of people is disposable in comparison to my children and providing for them.
My First Ever Live Stream Just Started!!!
Posted 10 years agoCommission Price List
Posted 10 years agoBADGES:
Badges are all traditional, done in archival mediums on acid free, thick cardstock, and laminated in the best quality sheets. My badges, even with heavy sun exposure, should stay bright and beautiful for 60+ years. Remember, all badges are buy two, get one free, and shipping is free for ALL ORDERS, even international.
• Mini chibi - $3 or 5 for $12 (GREAT convention roommate gifts)
Example: http://www.furaffinity.net/view/16760871/
• Custard Bun Chibi - $10
Example: http://www.furaffinity.net/view/16830972/
• Anthro bust - $25
Example: http://www.furaffinity.net/view/16519906/
• Anthro full body - $30-35
Example: http://www.furaffinity.net/view/16519963/
• Feral chibi - $20
Example: https://www.furaffinity.net/view/15941760/
• Anthro chibi - $25
Example: https://www.furaffinity.net/view/16520117/
• Plush - $30
Example: https://www.furaffinity.net/view/16518904/
• Voodoo doll - $30
Example: http://www.furaffinity.net/view/17724886/
• Realistic BW - $15
Example:https://www.furaffinity.net/view/15941817/
• Door Hanger - $35
Example: http://www.furaffinity.net/view/17054320/
ADD-ONS:
• Name - free
Example: https://www.furaffinity.net/view/16450943/
• Prop +$2
Example: http://www.furaffinity.net/view/16558721/
• BG +$5
Example: https://www.furaffinity.net/view/16520237/
• Power flames +$5
Example: http://www.furaffinity.net/view/16558686/
• Frame +$3
Example: https://www.furaffinity.net/view/15941882/
• Steampunk theme discount -$5
Example: https://www.furaffinity.net/view/15941804/
• Star Wars theme discount - $5
• Doctor Who theme discount -$5
*Additional characters are dependent on the piece itself.
OTHER:My digital art is new and something of which I am incredibly proud. My images start at 2,000 x 2,000 pixels. I draw every single hair on the piece by hand, with a 1-3 pixels single point brush. I stream all digital work, and will record your art coming to life if you want. I can also arrange to stream with your personal schedule, so long as it isn't some 3am madness.
• Art scenes are based upon complexity and size and can be traditional or digital. Because of the truly unlimited design possibilities on these, prices start at $50 and go upward.
• Reference sheet packages are $175, highly detailed and incredibly flexible to include your detailed points, and comes with 3 badges in your choice of style, to kick off your collection, shipped free! Example: http://www.furaffinity.net/view/16503622/
TERMS OF SERVICE:TOS journal here.
Art Post: Bukkake Nirvana?
Posted 10 years agoThis post is related to: http://www.furaffinity.net/view/13336951/
I contacted Tartii about commissioning a similar piece, of myself surrounded by penii. She is unwilling to duplicate such a similar concept, but gave me exclusive permission to mimic it. (I will provide this proof to anyone interested.) So, I have decided to make a high res piece with 10 partners, and there are 6 slots available. If you want your penis in it, it will be $12 ($15 for cumming).
This will be done digitally. Everyone included will get another piece: penile closeup of their hand holding themselves, in whatever state of arousal they choose. Are you naughty? Comment for a slot and we will use PM for payment (PayPal).
I contacted Tartii about commissioning a similar piece, of myself surrounded by penii. She is unwilling to duplicate such a similar concept, but gave me exclusive permission to mimic it. (I will provide this proof to anyone interested.) So, I have decided to make a high res piece with 10 partners, and there are 6 slots available. If you want your penis in it, it will be $12 ($15 for cumming).
This will be done digitally. Everyone included will get another piece: penile closeup of their hand holding themselves, in whatever state of arousal they choose. Are you naughty? Comment for a slot and we will use PM for payment (PayPal).
ITCHING TO ART TRADE!!!
Posted 10 years ago I have a SERIOUS hankering to art trade, especially for badges! >.< PM me if you are interested in doing so! 1:1 item swap 