Just sayin'. Playing lots of FF14 on Steam and CoD on Battle.Net.

-Shrug-

Oh, and I play VRChat now.

Holy crap it's been eternity since I posted anything here on FA. Probably because I've been spending far more time over on DeviantArt and especially FIMFiction.net these days working on blogs and stories!

If you're interested to see what's been up with me these days, pop by here to read my latest blog entry about my New Years Resolution and Christmas-y goodness!

http://www.fimfiction.net/blog/2678.....istmas-results

Hey guys! Been a while since I posted stuff here, right?

Welp, that's kinda cuz I haven't been tuning into FA all that much, let alone posting stuff here. Those blogs I've been posting have been going over to DeviantArt and FimFiction, and I haven't been adding them here on FA. Figured it was high time I wrote a new post and submitted my stories.

Speaking of which, anyone remember A Tale of Two Nations? Welp, that's scrap now. I've been working on a rewrite of it, and boy have I been trying to make a good story out of it with this new version. I've been updating and posting the story over on FimFiction and DeviantArt, so if you wanna check them out, they're at these two links, respectively:

http://www.fimfiction.net/story/296.....ice-of-loyalty
http://m1sf0rtune.deviantart.com/gallery/40582044

This new version of the story is called "The Price of Loyalty." It's gotten seriously ambitious since I started it six months ago, and hopefully it might turn into a special fanfic one day, assuming it all goes well. That's the dream anyway.

Be sure to give it a read if you get the chance! I sure could use the support. Like it? Love it? Give it some love over on DA and FimFiction! Could use them watchers and thumbs-up, and be sure to recommend it to your friends if you really enjoyed it.

Thanks for reading this blog guys. Hope to post another one sometime later.

For now, Ciao!

-M.

Hey folks, random journal to just post some thoughts I've been having recently. But I think I wanna get the big one outta the way first.

I'm gonna start writing.

Shocker! I know! I can't believe it myself. Now for those of you who know me whatsoever, you know I suffer with a disease that shatters writing careers or keeps them from even beginning, and it's been my Arch Nemesis for years; Writer's Block.

For years I've never had the inspiration to write a proper story, let alone one that would resonate well, because I'd constantly knock myself over the head thinking it'll suck or it's not good enough. It's why I plan, but never put anything down. But what changed I bet you're wondering? Simple; I got into roleplaying.

As I mentioned in my last update, I'm running a *very* large guild for which I'm the Guild Master, on Star Wars The Old Republic, and it's a roleplay guild that deals with political matters among other such drama. But I feel whatever writing potential I had was finally tapped into for the first time in years once I got the ball rolling in there, and now I feel more capable than ever to finally put some words down on paper, or in this case, text on a word document.

With my newly found confidence, I really want to get to work on something, and at first I figured I'd get back to my long forgotten Natural Selection Project, but I don't think I'm ready to pick that back up yet. Instead I had the idea of doing fanfictions. Being a fan of many things, I figured it's a good place to start, especially if I want to work on some short stories. I have one already in mind...and I'm not sure I wanna start with it... cuz it's My Little Pony.

Quite a drastic difference compared to my dark-in-tone story I wanna make in Natural Selection. Even more so, I'd want to make it a legitimate romance story that isn't a clopfic, but I know it's gonna be stupid nonetheless. I've had a few other ideas cropped up that I wanted to try, so hopefully I can make something soon.

On the same note, I want to try to get back into learning how to use some SDK's and Mod tools for some of my games, so I can try making my own story-driven mods, considering that's the kind of work I'd like to do in the future.

Apart from that, I don't really have much I wanna add, but there's one thing I would really like to do. In inspiration from my Star Wars RP, I'd like to post my background story I wrote a short while ago, and maybe that can keep me inspired to work on something. Heaven forbid it actually is the best work I've ever made, and that's not saying much.

ANYWAY!

I just wanted to get that outta my system and force my creative cogs to start turning and get to writing, and I hope you guys will have some patience with me so I can try to perfect my craft. After all I have neglected it for a long time. Just hope it won't be *too* bad.

That's all for now, M1SF0RTUNE out!

Hey folks, been a while since I wrote anything, and I feel like writing something today on my latest gaming exploits! Yeah yeah I know none of you care about that sorta thing but hey, I gotta write my thoughts somewhere! x3

Anywho, on to my latest update in the game-verse. I've been going through quite a bit of stuff since the whole business with RAGE, MW3, AC:R, and Batman Arkham City, and some of it wasn't good. I got 6 games from then during a trade, and it was those 4 plus Bastion and a DLC for Deus Ex: Human Revolution called "The Missing Link." Now, due to some crazy and stupid mishap, the games were removed from my Steam account, and I lost all of my pre-order bonuses I got from all of those (MW3 came with CoD4, AC:R had an exclusive character, and RAGE had some useful items I can't bring myself to play without). I did eventually get the games back, and then some thanks to the Christmas sale and a helpful friend. The games I got during that were those 6 plus the Humble Indie Bundle 4, Dungeons of Dredmor, Skyrim, Sonic Generations, Orcs Must Die, Limbo, FEAR 3, Star Wars - The Old Republic, Bulletstorm, Morrowind (GotY Edition), Unreal Tournament '99 (Game of the Year Edition), Bulletstorm, Dungeon Defenders, The Binding of Isaac, Hard Reset, Warhammer 40,000k Space Marine, Nuclear Dawn, Red Faction: Armageddon, Prince of Persia: The Forgotten Sands, All characters for Killing Floor, Tomb Raider Anniversary, Assassin's Creed II Deluxe, FEAR 1 Complete collection, Homefront, Sanctum Collection, Aaaah for the Awesome, a bunch of DLC for Assassin's Creed Revelations, Dungeon Defenders, and Homefront, Syndicate (most recent) and finally the big one: Mass Effect 3. But that's just all of my PC purchases since my last update.

(-takes a deep breath- Whew! That took a while!)

I was also feeling very compelled to pick up a few things for the Xbox 360, and it was more a trip back in time than a peek into the future of gaming, and that came in the form of the Silent Hill and Devil May Cry HD Collections. I've been curious about the games for a long time and I wanted to give them a spin, and I couldn't think of a much better way to do so than with those collections. They may not be the most optimal versions of the game to play, but hey, at least I have the games!

To go on record, every game I listed above are very good, and made me quite happy, but I haven't gotten to play all of them. The games I've played extensively were Star Wars - The Old Republic, and Mass Effect 3. SWTOR has been eating up quite a lot of my time and I'm happy it is, it's my favorite MMO I've ever played after all. As for Mass Effect 3, save for the massively disappointing ending, I absolutely love the game. My trips to Silent Hill and the universe of Devil May Cry have also been interesting treats, and I'll have to return soon to finish them up! I also hope to get to all of the other games I haven't played yet (which is about 60% of the list), and finish the rest (RAGE, AC:R and I need to play some more Skyrim), maybe even go back and play some more MW3 and Battlefield 3 for the hell of it. But I cannot pry myself from SWTOR it seems. I really wanna see all of the class stories and such!

Anyway, I don't wanna dive into big details but I just felt like posting this out of boredom and talkin' game stuff :B But that's all I wanna report, maybe for lols I'll start posting my adventures in Mass Effect or Star Wars (I'm in a Roleplay server actually, running my own guild too!). Other than that, not much to tell. Ooh yeah, I got me an iPod Touch, at long last! ^^ Now I can play Infinity Blade, Angry Birds and all that other silly-fun nonsense :3

Hope you enjoyed this random babbling about video games,

Technically this is more or less of a 3rd game-related update, but hey, I wanted to write a journal about game-related things going on in my life so here we go!

Last entry where I discussed what recent video games I got were about my latest entries then, Quake 4, and Brink, where I got a couple bitchin' items on TF2, as well as got ready for Deus Ex: Human Revolution, which turned out to be a mighty good game, one of my favorites, and also came with epic TF2 items. A lot's happened since then namely revolving around TF2 in the later months. But since my last entry, I picked up the Humble Indie Bundle 2 and 3 for me and a couple r/l friends of mine, and some other buddies hooked me up with a few random small things, such as DLC for Brink, another one sent Red Orchestra 2 my way, and the buddy that sent me the Brink DLC sent over From Dust a short while later. Another very good friend I've known online for a while then got he and I set up with Dead Island, a game I like very much, though to enjoy it to the fullest, it's best to play with a dedicated group of 3 other people, and play together, otherwise you'll suffer the Borderlands problems where if you're not all lined up on the same quests, you'll have to play catch-up, or if you're behind on the main quest, you don't get any credit for later quests. It's a small problem to an otherwise fun and satisfying game, and I hope to find some dedicated friends to play through it with. The Dead Island friend also sent me a copy of Section 8: Prejudice since he got a 4-pack. I really need to play it, I have heard some good things about it. >.> A short while later, the Need for Speed franchise goes on sale, including a game I've wanted to play for a long time: Need for Speed Hot Pursuit. My r/l buddy, same guy who hooked me up with From Dust and the Brink DLC, sent me Need for Speed Undercover. That was the latest game I figured I'd get for a while, until a thought struck me. Steam got updated with a new trade system to allow people to trade items for games, and I had a few particularly valuable items.

Story time kids!

In TF2, there's a massive trading community, and there's hats in the game that literally are priced $100+ because they're rare and very awesome-looking, and people pay big money to express themselves in their favorite video game. I happened to have a rare hat that I earned 2 years ago called the "Hat of Undeniable Wealth and Respect", which basically is a pirate hat with a treasure chest on it, and the treasure chest is guarded by a big octopus that sits on top of the whole hat =P This hat was only given to 500-ish people in the entire game of TF2 because in order to obtain it, you had to partake in a Treasure Hunt, that involved buying a bunch of games and doing an achievement in each game, as well as do some simple Steam-related achievements. There were 28 in all, but 7 Steam-related achievements, so there were 21 game-related ones. Thing is, I already had a little over half the games in that list, so I went through a lot of trouble and burned some of my cash to get the remaining games.

Therefore, I had me a Hat of Undeniable Wealth and Respect, and I proudly wore that hat for over a year. Then one day, I decided to see how much people would offer me for it. I got some lousy offers, then a guy came to me asking about it, and he let me set up a deal that I practically couldn't refuse. In that deal I got Call of Duty Modern Warfare 3, RAGE, Bastion some DLC for Magicka (the Gamer Robes) and DLC for Fallout: New Vegas (Lonesome Road, Gunrunner's Arsenal and Courier's Stash). I also got the Genuine Skyirm helmet, the Genuine Companion Cube badge, and 2 unusual hats on TF2. Over time, I traded the TF2 Unusual hats around, and I had a Frenchman's Beret for my Spy I was quite satisfied with, but my urge to get more games was irresistable. Eventually, I decided to cash the hats out and I got Battlefield 3: Limited Edition, which I've been playing quite a lot of (to date, I am rank 26), I also got Deus Ex: The Missing Link, a standalone DLC that's a squeeze-in chapter near the end of the game, I got The Elder Scrolls V: Skyrim for a close friend of mine (who in return sent me Dungeons of Dredmor. I'll be sure to play that, I promise!), then sold my other Unusual for Batman: Arkham City, and Assassin's Creed: Revelations.

Fable III also went on sale sometime around this sale period, and the r/l friend of mine that got me set up with the Brink DLC, Need for Speed Undercover, From Dust and a few other things also got me hooked up with Fable III and a Dog Breed DLC that was also on sale with it. Thanks again bro!

So today, I got to try RAGE and Battlefield 3 extensively, I haven't finished The Missing Link, and I'm biding my time with it or unable to play it for some reason, same story with Dead Island and RAGE. As for all the DLC I got for New Vegas, I'm gonna see about getting myself to play through the game and enjoy all the good that it has, since I seem to be missing a lot of it. The main cause of reluctance though I assume is lack of commitment, for all I know, and the same issue carries over with Fable III. Curse RPG's and their time requirements! Bastion, thankfully, I finished, and I gotta say it was an absolutely incredible game. Bastion is a fine example of a game that says Indie games are not small mini-games that don't deserve a lot of attention, because Bastion is possibly one of the industry's greats.

Finally, Modern Warfare 3 comes out in 2 days and I'm extremely excited to play it, and Skyrim a few days later (if my other r/l friend will pay me back the debt he owes me!), then finally Batman: Arkham City and Assassin's Creed will be released the following Tuesday. I gotta say I'm in for a lot more fun these next couple weeks, and even if Modern Warfare 3 might not exceed expectations, as mine are kinda low, I hope it'll at least have a better campaign than Battlefield 3 does and maybe a better co-op. The Multiplayer front however I'm doubtful. Skyrim will be interesting, but idk if I can be able to commit to it, since I have 4-6 other RPG's I need to finish as well, and then Batman I can't wait to play after the song and praise I've heard about it. AC:R on the other hand will be a wild card, because unfortunately AC is suffering a bit of franchise fatigue and idk if I'll ultimately enjoy the latest entry.

That all said, that's my latest gaming report. For those of you who like reading my reviews, I'll be posting them as soon as I can for Dead Island, RAGE, and the other handfull of games I've gotten these last few months, and I'll work on them for the upcoming games (and other 200 games I missed!). That's all for now folks, I hope you enjoyed this fun-filled entry of what's new in my gaming life \o/

-M.

Welp, as the name implies, not much to say here xD In terms of progress anyway. Thankfully, I'm writing this in a good mood despiiiite some things not going "according to plan" here and there. As for why I'm in a good mood, who knows. Anywho, here's what's new:

In the Good News department...

Assuming it is good news but it's holding me over. I picked up a few new games, and I'm replaying some older ones, games I should finish by hell or high water. In the brand-spanking new side o' things, I got Brink, Deus Ex Human Revolution, Quake 4, and lots of cool stuff on TF2, plus a few small bits of DLC for Brink and other random tidbits. I know a lotta people think Brink sucks and they have every right to call out the flaws of the game, but personally I love all the pro's it has to offer and it's been a great game to me. Quake 4, I never played the full game before, and I've meant to for a long time. Now, what posessed me to get these two games even though I'm piss poor? Welp, Brink, a game I've wanted for so long, went on discount for $25 during the big Steam QuakeCon sale. I could NOT miss that opportunity! Not to mention there was bitchin' hat for the sniper in TF2.

Quake 4 on the other hand was a game I wanted to play for a long while, and was never able to get my hands on, and finally it fell into my lap when it got added to Steam at long last, and even came with a kick-ass order deal, a replica of the Quake 1 rocket launcher in TF2. Okay, this is sounding like I got 'em for the hats and extras, but I didn't! I grew up with the Quake games since I was 5, and I freaking love the original, and incidentally the Original, the name of the replica rocket launcher, which so happens to be at the bottom middle of the screen just like and Quake, and even has the classic animations and sound effects =D It was a moment to completely geek out about.

I finished Quake 4, it was a fun fun game in my opinion, and Brink I still play, and I hope they'll do lots of balancing and tweaks, not to mention add more content to make it an even better game (opinion is obviously variable =P). Now Deus Ex: Human Revolution on the other hand is a very eye-opening game for me.

Storytime kids!

Once upon a time...

=P

Anywho, I never played the first Deus Ex, in fact I hardly played it. Why? Welp...over the years I hated that Liberty Island level and how restricted the game felt at the start, and also the graphics got to me. It was revolutionary once upon a time but now it's just an eye-sore. But yknow what, with the awesomness that is Human Revolution, I've been thinking of going back and actually finishing that damn game come hell or high water. I took care of one problem with it and that was to get rid of the awful graphics that made my eyes wanna bleed! I upgraded the game with all sorts of graphics mods I could fine. It was a trick to get goin, but now the game looks better than it ever did.

So yeah, I'm gonna play the original for damn sure, and also I beat Deus Ex. It's a great game, with a lot of variety and it brings back a lot of Dues Ex hallmarks, the main one being choosing how you wanna tackle your missions. It's a lot of fun and any gamer out there who likes RPG's and shooters should definitely pick it up.

Also, the other game I'm gonna finish is Fallout New Vegas. I hated how the game played compared to Fallout 3 at first, but for christ's sake I'm gonna play it, cuz I've heard a lot more good about it than I've noticed bad about it. I just need to get past that nagging irritation involving starting with nothing after I went through so much damn progress and collected everything in Fallout 3 >.> At least I got a cool Genuine Pip-Boy on TF2 for havin the game xD (And btw, awesome Deus Ex items in TF2 that I got thanks to my early pre-order. The Machina is a BEAST!)

Final bit I can very briefly cover in this section is that I've been making some friends, and things are taking an up-spin for once.

Now for the obligatory bad news...

Still no job. I worked my bum off to get considerations at GameStop, I'll just have to wait and see next month. I've also been putting in other apps but I haven't even gotten so much as a phone call. Also like I said I'm broke (thanks to those infernal games Brink and Quake 4. Damn you good games!), and not making any income whatsoever so bah. :|

Looooooooooooots of technical issues with this computer. I fear the worst that it's reaching the end of its' lifespan already :<

Finally there's just a bit of drama here and there but for once in my life I'm actually handling it fairly well =P

So yup! That's all folks :D

Maybe things will continue to incline...if I'm lucky, which I usually never am, lol. Til' next time, over and out.

-M.

Yknow, I completely lost track why I'm writing these, but I guess I'll just update the world on what's going on in my life.

The Good:

...Well, I got my friend's computer fixed so he's happy, and I'm getting back into TF2.

I got this month's Game Informer, talks about some new game from the guys who made Bioshock 2.

I'm still testing The Old Republic beta and...I got invited to test the Battlefield 3 Alpha.

That's it.

The Bad:

My computer got hit by a nasty virus, most of my documents got wiped and I had to do repairs to the operating system but thanks to what little knowledge of computers I had I averted an even bigger disaster. As I write this I'm trying to get some other things fixed so...that's progress on that I guess.

Still haven't gotten any interviews or job offers, so unfortunately I'm still not working. Also still undecided on a career path and college path, especially considering I'm trying really hard to come out of a depression phase... [See Last Journal Entry]

Parents are causing a lot of grief, and one of my r/l friends is starting to become a bit of a major burden. I'd rather not dig into the details on that one.

Poor. Dirt poor, can't afford anything, let alone food or gas to go around and apply for places.

Dad quit his job at Comcast, so we lost our Cable, and I don't know if he's gonna be able to get another job to keep paying for the bills soon.

Friends on Steam are not exactly talking to me these days and I have nobody to talk to, so I've been lonely, as usual.

I guess the last one I can put here is I've seriously considered abandoning my book project...I lost my co-writer, who apparantly now says the entire thing is garbage, and I actually agree. It's just some stupid cliche crap that's unoriginal and...well...stupid. I can't summon the creativity nor the willpower to rewrite his parts, let alone write anything. Guess it's just some stupid pipe dream better left buried.

The In-Between:

As for stuff not necessarily good or bad is...well...just some small updates on what I've been doing. I've been getting into modding some of my games, I found an interesting server on TF2 to start playing on, I got my internet sorta working again as well as my Xbox Live that was broken for a while, so I can play online on that again.

I may start doing Let's Plays. As for why, I guess it's just doing something with something I'm good at, though to be honest I think I sound terrible so I don't know if I'll ever actually do it. Just something I'm considering.

Last thing I guess I can say that I've been up to is just watching Let's Plays, aimlessly playing a few games and...doing next to nothing nearly 24/7.

So...yeah, life's a wreck. Still depressed, still fighting with this computer and a job with little to no will to do anything whatsoever, and...I just don't wanna do anything, other than play my games til I drop over dead. Not like I have anything better do with my life anyway, since all I've done is fuck everything up so far.

I can't help but think the force that's controlling my life has a really stupid and sick sense of humor. Thanks for the Battlefield 3 invitation right after I got a computer-crippling virus there DICE.

That's all I have to report for now folks...so tune in, assuming you're even reading these journals and listening to me rant about how much I hate myself and my life.

Welp, I'm writing this cuz I hate my life again. Why? Welp, somebody who used to be my best friend hates me over a stupid arguement he won't get the hell over and is being a spineless pussy about the whole issue, then on a couple other notes I'm still a resident in heartbreak hotel after a personal matter, oh and let's not forget I am completely fucking up what few friendships I have left! \o/

One of my best r/l friends Tyler and I also got into a fight, and I suspect he has hostile feelings towards me now. Yippee. And he's also probably gonna go to Prison. To add more shit on this little misery pile, another good buddy of mine, long story short, that I had somewhat of a close relationship then some up and down encounters with removed me, and I'm pretty sure that we hate each other. Maybe I just hate him now or idk what.

In other news, I'm still having difficulty getting a job. Most of my applications apparantly have gotten turned down completely flat, and I haven't heard from any of my other ones. I'm almost flat broke, my mom irl is giving me a hell of a hard time, and here's the kicker ladies and gents:

I dunno what I wanna do with my life, and as of today, I officially don't care! Hoo! \o/ Shit's falling apart and no matter what I try to do to fix it, nobody wants to listen to my inane or depressing ranting, nobody gives a rats ass whether I'm lonely 24/7 or not, and my closest friends can't remember diddly squat any of the good times we had and don't really care about them, they just wanna throw me out in front of a fucking car and get on with their lives like they took out the trash.

Oh and before anyone mentions why I'm not taking medication, seeking counseling, or finding any sort of reason to self improve myself, I got 2 simple reasons: Can't afford it, and no reason to do it! I lost my best friends, my girlfriend, my job, and my credentials are going quickly down the drain, whether I control that factor or not. Oh and just a small subnote on that, I'm not doin college cuz...welp, I dunno what career to do nor do I give a damn about doing it! Waste o' time if you ask me! :3

Ladies and gentleman, I kindly invite you all to find me irl and blow my brains out :D Cuz I'm getting sick and tired of all this bullshit and no matter what I do or say to POSSBILY fix it, nobody gives a rat's ass and it doesn't make one lick of a difference. Case closed! Imma go brood now, maybe bang my head against a wall a few dozen times until I bust it open.

($50 that it'll take 2-3 times, especially if I do it really hard :P Any takers?)

My life's story, the update, ladies and gents. Hope you like it! \o/

P.S. I'm watching My Little Pony. I think it's official to put on the record that I have gone insane. ^^

Welp, I guess it might be a good idea to start some sort of Journal (series) about the hobby I love the most in the world, and that's Games, Games, Games!

For starters, to those who don't know, I have literally over 400 games in my posession, almost 350 for the PC alone. Most of my library can be viewed here: http://steamcommunity.com/id/M1SF0R...../games?tab=all Also to those who don't know, Steam is my main method of contact for all those reasons alone :P Since it's my main gaming hub, it's where I talk to most of my friends and do most of my gaming through. I'm almost always on there and when I'm not, chances are I'm not online in general =P

Anywho, as much as I'd like to talk about all my games in detail, I'll just blather about some of my more recent updates. Over the past few years I've been doing some trading here and there for some better games to spend time playing, I've gotten various freebies, and I've worked hard to earn a few of my most recent ones to date. Since the year is 2011, I'll just share how my year is kicking off game-wise.

I've started this wonderful year off with the epic Dead Space 2, and it's truly a treasure in my library. It's scary, action-packed, and to me it's loads of fun. I've replayed it about 4 times or so, and I'm trying to finish a 5th on the Hardcore difficulty (Only three saves, and when you die you have to go aaaaaaall the way back to your last save, and this is a 12-hour game we're talking about!), and I'm hoping it'll be a nominee for the Game of the Year awards, it certainly deserves it.

As the year rolled on, I got to try out several great games, including Dragon Age II, some DLC's for some of my older games, and then I picked up a few console games including GoldenEye 007 for the Wii, Resident Evil 4 and Darkside Chronicles for the same platform, and the truly surprising Monster Hunter Tri. That game absolutely blew my mind, I wish I would've started playing it eons ago! I'll have to get back to playing it sometime soon!

To cover some other important bases, I've picked up a few more games, including Crysis 2, way better than the first in my opinion, and then I picked up Assassin's Creed Brotherhood for the PC. For those who know me well, Assassin's Creed is paws down one of my favorite series ever made, and I loved Brotherhood so much, I got the 360 version, as well as the PC version later on, when it had a great dealbreaker for the pre-order special that I couldn't refuse.

I also picked up the Warcraft III Battle Chest, since I'm partially in the spirits of the Warcraft games again. Not much, but still. Although one of the grand prizes of my collection that I've recently picked up is the absolutely incredible Portal 2. Every single gamer on the planet has got to play Portal 2, it's just pure joy in a $50 package, with hilarious comedy, clever puzzles, a unique story, wonderful and unforgettable characters, it's by far the best game of the year, if not one of the best games of all time.

I've been blessed with other great smash hits just very recently, in the form of the new Mortal Kombat, and L.A. Noire, my most recent games. These two games absolutely took me away, with Mortal Kombat being a throwback to one of my only two favorite fighting series in gaming history, it's violant, it's bloody, and it's classic, just the way I love it, with a bunch of great content to boot, and kick-ass Multiplayer that'll keep me coming back for years to come.

Next up, L.A. Noire, and boy was this game a unique experience. First thing I gotta mention, I was extremely reluctant to trade 2 of my closest games, Call of Duty Black Ops (I have the PC version, but had the 360 version to play with buddies on Xbox Live and irl), and Halo: Reach (I regret trading that quite a bit...) for an awesome sale GameStop had for the game, where you trade in 2 specific games, you get $50 off. Was hard to pass up for a game I had high hopes for, and whaddya know, it payed off in spades (I still regret selling Reach though .-. Ah well, I'll get it back someday). Basically, it's a crime-solving game based in the 1940's, and it's an astounding presentation with terrific acting featuring brand new, and very impressive technology, portraying very realistic acting unlike any game before it. It has officially set a brand new standard in video game acting, as well as being a top notch game. With the very very few crime-solving games out there, they're like westerns, there's a lot of average ones, few good ones, but very very rare great ones. L.A. Noire is one of those games, for giving you some gruesome, yet interesting detective work, sprinkled with moments of fun action, and lots of intrigue. For those looking for a great new immersive experience, and also to those wanting to come as close as they can to being a real detective without actually trying to become a detective (and avoiding all the hazards there-in), L.A. Noire is an unforgettable game that's going to have me coming back to solve the cases perfectly, as well as experience the thrilling stories of said cases as well.

Finally, Dragon Age. Dear god I have never been playing this game as much as I ever have before in a lifetime. Thanks to the success with the Mass Effect games where you create an adventure that you take with you into the sequels, that thrill followed me into the Dragon Age games, and I got even more excited to play it after Dragon Age: Origins Ultimate Edition went on sale for $20. It's a $100 value, with the base game, the expansion pack, and every single DLC released in that $20 sale and I refused to skip it, even if I already had the game and the expansion (All of the DLC is $40+ apparantly .-.) and lord was I grateful I made this buy. The first time through, it was a frustrating as hell game, where I barely came to grips with the tactics and mechanics, but now with experience of the game under my belt, I took the game by the horns and made it my bitch =P As well as having a 10x more enjoyable experience this time around. I tried a different class, I've done different story stuff, made a different character, basically went through the game entirely different than before and now I officially love the game when before I thought of it as nothing but a chore to play. I've played Origins for a rock-solid 60-70 hours, and I haven't even 100% completed the game, despite my efforts to try. It's simply too damn big, and there's so much to see. So much so I may even spend another 70-80 hours, believe it or not, with a brand new character, making lots of other different decisions to see how they pan out, and for one big-time reason: To see how they play out in Dragon Age II. The stupid part? I haven't even gotten half-way through Dragon Age II yet and I'm already going back and making multiple characteres to upload. It's insanity! So I got DA2, even with some DLC I bought for it, and more stuff to see in Dragon Age: Origins, I got so much stuff to keep me busy it's silly, with JUST the Dragon Age games alone. Funny, considering the game is 2 years old and here I am about ready to replay it a third time, without just finishing DA2 first .-. Ah well, guess that's a sign of a great game eh? Hard game, takes getting used to, but a fun one, and DA2 is even more fun! \o/

-takes a deep breath then lets it out- Welp! That's all I have for my first Gaming Update. I'd love to discuss my pre-2011 games in more detail, but eh -shrugs- There'll be another day for that I suppose. Oh and one more thing, if anyone likes that sorta thing, here are my personal reviews for games I've covered and critiqued myself: http://www.gametrailers.com/users/M.....RTUNE/gamepad/ It's very short on reviews of all my recent games I've played but I'll catch up to them most definately. Anywho, that's all for now!

Welp, I'm 19, getting ready to turn into an old coot before long :B

So yeah xD

Here I am again...not even knowing why I'm writing these. I spent a few hours with my friend Stephen, and had a decent time, playing Halo Reach, and let me borrow some of his Star Trek movies.

Well...he's gone...and things are just too damn quiet. What's worse is that I'm listening to the song Promise from the Silent Hill 2 soundtrack as I write this, which pretty much is a song that sums up my mood right now, in terms of how it sounds and such.

I can't stop looking at the members in a Steam group I'm in, many of them containing my old friends. I wish I could stop caring or stop looking, but I can't seem to help it.

Things are too quiet. I'm starting to feel like I'm going paranoid because of it... I feel like no matter what I do or say...I could scream all I want and it'd be like shouting into the void, just begging for a response, for someone to rush to my side and make this void not be empty anymore.

But there's nobody there. I'm alone. I could scream and scream and scream at the top of my lungs and nobody would hear me. I don't know what to do, I don't know who to turn to, where to go, why I should just keep walking this treadmill like I'm on life support.

I need help...I really...really need help...but I don't know who to trust anymore, let alone know where to look for help. I'm alone again...and there's not a damn thing I can do to make that fact go away. And not even Tyler's able to come save me from my torment now.

I'm alone...alone again, ignored again...suffering again...finding more and more ways to destroy my life intentionally or unintentionally.

I want a god damn way out...

-M.

Well, my life keeps finding ways to get worse. Not only am I still losing more friends than I'm making, I heard probably the worst thing yet. My best friend, Tyler, who visits me every 2 weekends, and has been a major support for my lonliness gig...

Is in Jail.

I'm not gonna disclose what happened, but right now he's been in there for a while and will still be in there for a while, and I don't know how long it'll be or what I can do for him. I had one of the worst episodes of my life last night, thus my "Confession" journal entry... I was going to add a part 2, until I got caught up with my little cousin's 3rd Birthday and the news about my best friend, the only other life I interact with aside from Stephen, another friend of mine and Tyler's, whom I hardly get to see very much, I'm too preoccupied to write pt. 2 or edit the current Confession entry.

But just to get one thing straight, my life's getting shittier by the minute. Close friends are removing and blocking me for reasons they won't share with me, or even attempt to fix with me, my best friend is in jail, and I just keep making the stupidist decisions I could possibly make.

It won't be long before I end up in a straightjacket at this rate...or put a gun to my head and pull the trigger.

The hits just won't stop coming, and I really want them to stop.

I want all this damn bullshit to stop and life would go back to the way it was, but I guess that's like asking to be able to control the rotation of the Earth or to have the powers of God himself.

Until the next entry...

-M.

For the record, I'm not doing so well at all anymore. I just keep finding more ways to fuck up my life and I keep refusing it's my fault. So you know what? I'm just gonna come out and say it because I'm tired of lying to myself and lying to everyone.

I am an attention whore. I'm a slut. I'm an obsessed game addict. I'm a pathetic clingy fucking bastard who can't be able to move on. And I constantly feel like I can't do a damn thing about it, nor do I even want to.

Some of my closest friends I cherished playing games with and having good chats with hate me and avoid me like the plague, and I can't move on from my ex- Lee. The truth is that I miss him very much, and I would give up everything and anything to get him back but the problem is nothing I say, do, or whatever matters. He's gone, most of my friends are gone, my reputation's gone, my future's gone...everything that honestly matters to me is gone.

I constantly lust for love and attention because I feel like I never ever get it willingly anymore. But even worse is that I constantly intrude on people to vent my problems when it's not even welcome...and I know it. But I just can't fucking help a lifetime of bad habits...not to mention I don't want to. Nothing I say or do will bring any of it back...and there's nothing in the future that I want. There's no amount of money, fame, or women for that matter that can truly make me happy deep down inside again.

All that matters to me is Lee...and how much I just fucked up and how much I wanna just hurt myself, if not kill myself hundreds of times over for what I've done to him.

I don't care anymore about how pathetic I seem or if this is trying to nab pity. I'm just confessing at this point. I cheated on him, I cheated on others, I got clingy on people, and just kept doing more and more stupid stuff all because I've been so god damn lonely and want attention so much... Lee was the only one that was able to make me feel whole, and I was so ready to make hundreds of sacrifices for him...but now I can't...

-sigh- I don't know what I'm doing anymore, I don't know what to do, I don't even think I care about anything anymore. I don't have the willpower to get a job, get off my computer, write my book, or even go to college. And what's worse is I just don't want to move on because I love him too damn much. He asked me the day before he left me if he was the only one I loved and I was such a stupid fucking idiot that night, telling him that I love other things...even if that didn't necessarily mean just people. I'm a god damn fool. A whore, a fool, and a pathetic, lazy coward, and I know it.

I don't know why I'm writing this journal in here anymore. I don't care. Just a stupid journal I guess I can write my thoughts into. My only thoughts right now are of Lee, my mistakes, and how much I want to make them all go away and be with my only love again...thoughts that do nothing but hurt.

I miss Lee. I miss my old friends. I miss my old life. I miss being able to enjoy video games. I miss feeling wanted. But most of all I miss Lee.

I just want someone to put me out of my misery at this point. I can't take it anymore. This is weight I can't carry another mile, let alone thousands.

That's all for this Journal I guess...

-M.

Well, it's been a few days since my horrible depression spiral. I've made a decent comeback at least, after playing some games, chatting with some folks, among other things. But to lighten things up, I decided to write this journal about my Natural Selection project.

I haven't been working on it, due to lazyness, writer's block, among other things, but I figured I'd like to tell the world what all's been done with it so far, to see if I can build any hopeful interest x3

For those that haven't been tuning into the Natural Selection project, it's going to be a series of books me and my good friend Zombie (aka Zephyr) are writing together. The story's going to be split into 3 main chunks, the first chunk being 3 stories by the perspectives of 3 important characters in the Natural Selection universe. This part of the story is called the Natural Selection Prelude.

The three stories follow the history of characters Goliath, Zephyr, and Pandora, throughout their struggles in the wasteland. There may be a 4th story but that's yet to be decided, by one of my characters, Syre. Goliath's story is that of a personal one, where the true battle isn't on the field, it's within, where the wolf has to fight the heavy burden of his war-torn past filled with betreyal, death, and heavy depression. Zephyr's is a story of leadership, where he must lead the Feran race (the furries' name in the story) to freedom. The final story is that of Pandora, who's story is later on down the line, during the time of New Eden. Her story is that of betreyal, and uncovering the many layers of the truth from the shadows.

The Prelude covers 2 main story arcs, a war that happened between Ferans and Humans, and the Ferans' lives in the city of New Eden, built by Humans and Ferans to create a new civilization; a new start to the world. Both arcs will be told by Zephyr and Goliath, and the 2nd arc will introduce Pandora. Syre may be a 4th story, telling her perspective of the War, before we swap her for Pandora when the New Eden arc starts. I'll be posting chapters of the Prelude from Goliath and Pandora's stories, possibly starting with Goliath first until I get to New Eden, where I'll begin Pandora's tale.

This is the Prelude story of Natural Selection. The main story will be in my novel-form trilogy, simply being called Natural Selection. As for the subtitles, those will come in once we've decided how the main story will play out. Natural Selection covers the story of Ghost, who's a human survivor in the wasteland of Post-WWIII Earth, where one day a mysterious woman completely covered in rags barges into his home, and asks for his help. This triggers a huge series of events that take place after the Prelude, and tell an epic story of survival, love, action, among many other surprises.

The final chunk of the story is called Newborn, name is subject to change. Newborn takes place several years after the Natural Selection trilogy ends, and it's another trilgoy that takes place with a new main character, which I won't reveal here. The story is still a work in progress, and there won't be much news until after the Prelude and NS trilogy are completed.

Well that's it for this journal entry xP Hope you all enjoyed this topic this time around!

Also, if any of you are interested in seeing some of my friend's sketches and bio's of the characters in the Prelude story, I'll be more than happy to post them, if I get Zombie's permission of course x3 (For the record they're not entirely accurate, but they're great representations of what to expect of the characters in the NS universe).

For more info on the story feel free to Note me and ask any questions you like ^^ It's a hugely ambitious project, and I can't wait to publish it!

My life sucks.

I graduated, got a few lucky strikes with regaining old friendships, playing exclusive betas, and other menial nonsense. As much as I try to enjoy all the little things...I just can't anymore.

These last 6 months have been nothing but torture for me. I keep trying to ask myself "What's the point? Why keep trying to live? Why be happy if you *know* things are bad?" I lost the love of my life...the only person I ever truly loved with all my heart, and was ready to create a future with. There's nobody that was any more perfect than he was...and I fucked it up...

I'm living a life of regret now. Regret for everything I've ever done, from playing games, to hurting my only love. I'm somewhat being forced to find a job soon...which is not a happy task, not by a long shot.

My games aren't even doing anything to bring me peace of mind... The thing that was once my favorite hobby in the world, a source of fun, competition, good stories, and inspirations, are nothing but bleak, pointless drugs to me now, that's starting to lose their value and good taste. I've bought numerous games to try and celebrate for my graduation with, but they're not doing me any justice. I've hardly even touched them since I bought them all. It's pretty pathetic.

Everything that mattered the entire universe to me is gone. My only love, some of my closest and dearest friends, a life I had with various communities where I felt welcome, they're all but gone now. I'm alone, and trying to live with that life, while I'm trapped in misery, and no matter what I do, I can't escape.

The worst part? This is E3 week. The Electronic Entertainment Expo, where it's the biggest gaming convention in the entire world...and it was like a holiday to me. Now...I hardly care for it. I hardly care about the things I enjoy anymore. I hardly care about anything. Nothing matters anymore.

The only thing that can help me now is if someone points a gun at my head and pulls the trigger.

I can't take it anymore.

Hallo folks! Well as the title says, I've been pretty glued to Mass Effect lately thanks to #2, the best game I believe I've ever played in a long time (personal opinion anyway). Due to the game being so incredible, I've been going back to Mass Effect 1 and been replaying the crap outta the two games, and due to a spark of showing off how much of a fan I am, I started a personal Stat-Tracker. I began the Tracker at 3/26/10, and I'll be updating it periodically to show my characters' levels, their alignment (Paragon/Reneagde [Good guy and Badass/Asshole, respectively]), class, and even where they're at in their mission.

I'll be posting the stat-tracker on Steam, and maybe if some of you good folks comment me enough to start posting it as a Journal, then I'll be happy to post 'em.

As well as the location of my Stat Tracker, you'll find this being my true Steam Profile. If you wish to add me, feel free to send me an invite! Just be sure to tell me who you are when you do add me for the first time =P

http://steamcommunity.com/id/M1SF0RTUNE

You can also find my SteamID on my main FA page, as always.

That's all for now! Til then folks,

-M.

Well...let's see. This is the first Journal I've had in a while so where do I begin.

-sigh-

Welp, first thing's first. Life's kinda crappy for me at the moment. The love of my life left me just shortly after my 18th birthday, I'm failing my classes, I keep getting technical difficulties, my group I was hoping to get going completely fell apart, I got disowned by people I held very close to me, and I may not be able to graduate. Things don't seem like they want to improve in any way, shape or form, and I've fallen into some really really deep pits of depression, and I'm trying to make do with what I can.

On the upside, I've been playing my new favorite games to what seems like no end, including Aliens vs Predator, Bioshock 2, and the king of my collection Mass Effect 2. I've been gaming quite a bit here and there and I got some of my collection built up, both for my PC and some games on my Xbox 360, although it isn't saying much. I'm trying to see about getting my grades up but I'll be grounded from the internet every now and again, or that's the assumption. If I just keep working I won't lose any internet time, I hope.

Though I'll admit, stuff just isn't looking very high and mighty for me and I'm having difficulty moving along. I'm still trying at the least. Trying to make new friends, do some different things, and maybe things will improve. That's the hope anyway. Not to mention there's still my book.

ZombieZephyr, from FA and DA, and also Steam, has been helping me quite a bit with my book and he's officially my co-writer. I dunno where the hell I'd be without him around. (Thanks Zombz). So far as for progress on it, he and I are actually working on 3 different prelude stories that are optional to read, but take place before my book. I'm also trying to solidify ideas and use the Prelude bits to practice on my writing, and hopefully things will turn out good. Hell, the book is one of the main reasons I still have a reason to go on.

Anyway, I guess that's all for my progress report. Things still feel pretty crappy and I keep falling into some depression pits, but at least I'm still walking. I'm just hoping I don't fall into another pit of spikes that I was barely able to climb out of...

Til the next time,

-M.

Well, the title pretty much explains it. Yeah, I'm gonna be posting my book as it builds up progress, but only for so many chapters. After it reaches a certain point, I'm gonna stop updating it or take it off my FA, so the rest can be written spoiler-free and hopefully onto being published. But in the time it remains on my profile, I'd love any feedback I can get, but it'd be appreciated if they came in the form of notes, instead of comments. If you want to leave a general comment, then by all means go ahead. I'll keep you folks posted if I release any new chapters or tweaks to the chapters. Anyway, this is M. and thanks for reading!

Welp...first Journal. Guess I'll just say this, I've been swinging by the FA site millions and millions of times, many of my friends have an account here, and I guess the time comes where I make my own. Hope I'll make the best of it =P So enjoy folks! And hopefully tune into some of my works while you're here x3