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Posted 17 years agoI'm on my way goin nowhere-headin downhill-lost all my principals-cant believe I'm movin still-I'm zonin in on nothin-runnin on E-thats why i call myself my own worst N.EME-I done lost it all- and it aint worth recovering-cuz this addiction I have is like a hunger-it wont stop grumbling-I'd try to quit but it aint worth it in the end-cuz life took too many and i got none to lend.
My home boy is a producer and he asked me when was i going to throw down somethin so this is wat i came up with in 20 mins lol. Need to match a beat and stuff to it but its gonna be fresh!!
My home boy is a producer and he asked me when was i going to throw down somethin so this is wat i came up with in 20 mins lol. Need to match a beat and stuff to it but its gonna be fresh!!
I want Money Lots && Lots of Money
Posted 17 years agoSo scratch cancelling my account. I have way too many subs to post! But anyway, I need a job! Like now! Selling my art isn't cuttin it.
I need to find a way to make 60 bucks in 3 days. Talk about pressure! so if you got any ideas throw em at me.
I need to find a way to make 60 bucks in 3 days. Talk about pressure! so if you got any ideas throw em at me.
Lead Poison
Posted 17 years agoI am resigning from the fandom. I am taking down my art. I am cancelling my account within the next few days.
The human mind is simple. Its easy to put together how a person acts, thinks and reacts to certain events.
Tensile strength is the stress at which a material breaks or permanently deforms. Apply this force to the human mind.. better yet, the will one has to maintain thier stabillity. Some find it hard to look at an object and find this point when it appears to be completely solid to the naked eye. One who thinks outside the box, can and will, find this point. That is more dangerous than any weapon will EVER, be.
This tencile strength, when applied to will power, can be easily manipulated by an ouside force.
Yield strength is the stress at which material strain changes from elastic deformation to plastic deformation, causing it to deform permanently. In this case the cause of change, a simple item that will eventually destroy ones will power. Let me remind you, the will power I speak of is directed toward the ability to refrain from being manipulated.
Now once this Yield strength has been applied, the will to stay in an original form will go from straight, to bent in a U shape and will eventually become perminently damaged or break all together. Right now, that U has proved to be stable enough to resist being overwhelmed and ultimately breaking in half. The next task is to calculate how long it will take before the pressure is too much. It is already hard to tell what its original form was.
The one who thinks outside the box can clearly see that this object was never strong from the jump.
Lets add a pair of pliers to this equation as an outside force. One can bend the U to appear to be as close to its original state as possible, but it will never be the same again. This persons will can never be as strong as it once was and matter of fact, it is weaker than it was before the pliers were used. Now, when that same force is applied again, the pliers will be used again creating an even great weakness. As the cycle continues, this persons will becomes dependant on the outside force acting upon it. But how long will the point at which it is bending stay strong enough before it gives away and breaks? Or what if this outside force is taken away?
If the outside force is taken away, there will no longer be anything to keep the illusion that this persons will is strong. Then the ones who cannot look outside the box, see it for what it really is. Weak. But only until you take this force away, will anyone see it from a different disposition.
The ball is in motion and will continue to be in motion till brought to an abrupt stop. That is the point of which the pliers will be taken away and you all will see this person for who he really is. Then you will get the vindication you've always wanted. This person chose the wrong person to try intimidation tactics with pliers and in the WRONG place.
Welcome to phsycological physics. Class is dismissed.
The human mind is simple. Its easy to put together how a person acts, thinks and reacts to certain events.
Tensile strength is the stress at which a material breaks or permanently deforms. Apply this force to the human mind.. better yet, the will one has to maintain thier stabillity. Some find it hard to look at an object and find this point when it appears to be completely solid to the naked eye. One who thinks outside the box, can and will, find this point. That is more dangerous than any weapon will EVER, be.
This tencile strength, when applied to will power, can be easily manipulated by an ouside force.
Yield strength is the stress at which material strain changes from elastic deformation to plastic deformation, causing it to deform permanently. In this case the cause of change, a simple item that will eventually destroy ones will power. Let me remind you, the will power I speak of is directed toward the ability to refrain from being manipulated.
Now once this Yield strength has been applied, the will to stay in an original form will go from straight, to bent in a U shape and will eventually become perminently damaged or break all together. Right now, that U has proved to be stable enough to resist being overwhelmed and ultimately breaking in half. The next task is to calculate how long it will take before the pressure is too much. It is already hard to tell what its original form was.
The one who thinks outside the box can clearly see that this object was never strong from the jump.
Lets add a pair of pliers to this equation as an outside force. One can bend the U to appear to be as close to its original state as possible, but it will never be the same again. This persons will can never be as strong as it once was and matter of fact, it is weaker than it was before the pliers were used. Now, when that same force is applied again, the pliers will be used again creating an even great weakness. As the cycle continues, this persons will becomes dependant on the outside force acting upon it. But how long will the point at which it is bending stay strong enough before it gives away and breaks? Or what if this outside force is taken away?
If the outside force is taken away, there will no longer be anything to keep the illusion that this persons will is strong. Then the ones who cannot look outside the box, see it for what it really is. Weak. But only until you take this force away, will anyone see it from a different disposition.
The ball is in motion and will continue to be in motion till brought to an abrupt stop. That is the point of which the pliers will be taken away and you all will see this person for who he really is. Then you will get the vindication you've always wanted. This person chose the wrong person to try intimidation tactics with pliers and in the WRONG place.
Welcome to phsycological physics. Class is dismissed.
Cross Roads
Posted 17 years agoThis continues from "Killing Me Softly":
I've come to grips with things. Its time to choose a different path to walk. The one i was goin down was going to take me straight to bein co-dependant on a loser. I decided not to love him and that i deserve better. So I've got some new friends, hardly ever at home, I'm paintin and drawin again and i have new submissions I'm hopin to get posted up here. Its all downhill from here! I've got hope! lol. Wish me luck!
I've come to grips with things. Its time to choose a different path to walk. The one i was goin down was going to take me straight to bein co-dependant on a loser. I decided not to love him and that i deserve better. So I've got some new friends, hardly ever at home, I'm paintin and drawin again and i have new submissions I'm hopin to get posted up here. Its all downhill from here! I've got hope! lol. Wish me luck!
Killing Me Softly
Posted 17 years agoWhy does it seem like when something is finally gettin good someone has to pull the rug from under you? Well life has come to a screaming bloody hault. Serously. The one I thought was my One nd Only has a one nd only love of his own, Cocaine. I cant find a good job, I have no inspiration to draw or even play video games.... *Gasp!* I dnt even have any WIP's I can work on. well i do but i dnt want to. This is about the time i wish i were back in school. I am completely lost. I made a few new friends but they all have ties to my druggie x. My juggalo homeboy is out of town all week and only comes around on the weekend too. Lost, lost, lost, lost! I feel like i have no purpose anymore. Im empty. Oh well, lets hope they are right and time will heal wounds. *sigh*.... Must Have Hope...
Updatez
Posted 17 years agoSo the new pics i posted aren't of the greatest quality but i said I would get some stuff posted some way or another! I'm bout to break 100 profile views! Woot! Not a very big accomplishment but it is to me. ::curls up in corner:: ...leave me alone!!!! anyway hope u like it. Finished products are soon to come.
Blah blah blah
Posted 17 years agoSo, i bought a video cam. today... Gotta have some form of entertainment if u kno what i mean... Stop it u perv! Lol anyway, i have a bunch of work to put up. I might just break down and do it the ol fashon way and take a pic of them. It sux but you gotta deal. There will b work posted soon so do not fear!
Lets Brodcast This!!
Posted 17 years agoSo after all the drama has started to come to a stop, it started up again. I'm not sorry for what i have done. Getting an F.A. account may be the end of the world to her but it doesn't matter to me. She feels betrayed?!? If anyone should it would be dad. well maybe not betrayed but let down. If you say you are going to do something dont let your selfish-ness ruin a good time for someone you consider "blood". I hate having to deal with my dad when he is all upset about her. He has a new girl and he seems happier than hell and when both of us were at home with him and his new interest, he seemed like he had the whole world in his hands. Then once again, a party or her friends were more important than spending time with her familly. I hate having to listen to my dad thinking out loud asking if it was something he did or trying to answer his own questions of why is she like that? Why cant she just come back and brighten his world up again? Its bad enough the rest of our familly is broken and never seem to have the time to come together for anything anymore. Someone has to be in the hospital for everyone to be in one place at one time. Thats good but sad... So I can say.. me dad and grandma are the only galloways that talk like back in the day. i wish it could be different but if someone doesnt wanna be a part of something you cant force them to.
I talk to people. I am a social person. you can not expect me to not talk to someone because it will ruin a relationship. All the people in my life are jealous of eachother. I cant text one person because someone doesn't like them and they blackmail me with being dis-owned. I love everyone that I have in my life right now. they are the closest friends i have ever had, have it be familly, friends or something more. And another thing, if you aren't around to see what is going on keep your attitude to yourself and keep your mouth shut. i am happy. It would be cool if you were around cuz i miss you alot but you're not. That applies to two people.
Alot of cruel words were said and spread with these two. But one thinks its ok to just come back into my life after saying all this and expect me to want to take thier last name again. The other one has been a complete stranger that i dont know from a can of pain anymore and plays cool with their problems with me cuz all they know how to do is run from thier issues. I can trust a word of what they tell me because after being told lies for so long its hard to believe anything now. I wish I could delete people from my memory and life but i cant so i have to deal. Well dealer calls, lay your cards down and show me what you got.
Then there is the people who believed the bull who can find something to shove up dark holes. The things i have heard that are slathered across my name are unbelievable. I copy peoples art?! C'mon now! thats just hating on me. Callin me every name under the sun because he cant keep that dime pinned between his knees? Hes a horrible person because he quote/unquote raised a hand to you when you are just trying to make a scapegoat to cover your butt? I guess it does make people feel better to talk trash. Thats crazy but it is life. I cant even trust my Juggalo homeboys.
Oh well the ranting is over. I guess. Me having this account is kinda use-less cuz now i cant post my art. I will keep it just in case I can get my hands on a scanner. But its going to be a while before i get new art posted. Sorry. -.-'
I talk to people. I am a social person. you can not expect me to not talk to someone because it will ruin a relationship. All the people in my life are jealous of eachother. I cant text one person because someone doesn't like them and they blackmail me with being dis-owned. I love everyone that I have in my life right now. they are the closest friends i have ever had, have it be familly, friends or something more. And another thing, if you aren't around to see what is going on keep your attitude to yourself and keep your mouth shut. i am happy. It would be cool if you were around cuz i miss you alot but you're not. That applies to two people.
Alot of cruel words were said and spread with these two. But one thinks its ok to just come back into my life after saying all this and expect me to want to take thier last name again. The other one has been a complete stranger that i dont know from a can of pain anymore and plays cool with their problems with me cuz all they know how to do is run from thier issues. I can trust a word of what they tell me because after being told lies for so long its hard to believe anything now. I wish I could delete people from my memory and life but i cant so i have to deal. Well dealer calls, lay your cards down and show me what you got.
Then there is the people who believed the bull who can find something to shove up dark holes. The things i have heard that are slathered across my name are unbelievable. I copy peoples art?! C'mon now! thats just hating on me. Callin me every name under the sun because he cant keep that dime pinned between his knees? Hes a horrible person because he quote/unquote raised a hand to you when you are just trying to make a scapegoat to cover your butt? I guess it does make people feel better to talk trash. Thats crazy but it is life. I cant even trust my Juggalo homeboys.
Oh well the ranting is over. I guess. Me having this account is kinda use-less cuz now i cant post my art. I will keep it just in case I can get my hands on a scanner. But its going to be a while before i get new art posted. Sorry. -.-'
The Snowball Effect
Posted 17 years agoConfusion walks my thoughts;
Dispair holding its hand.
The shadow of lament,
appears after every ray of blithe.
One can only grasp the consept of Pain,
when the full story is known.
To the rest..
Its a joke.
I stare in to oblivion wielding a heavy heart.
My understanding of my actions is no longer clear.
So in return, I match confusion with anger.
My anger is blind and
turns all forms of admiration into crisp snow flakes.
I find myself lost without consciousness of values.
The steel is cold
as is the snowballing effect i find myself in.
Deep, Dark & Depressing. I know. I'M NOT EMO!!!!!
Dispair holding its hand.
The shadow of lament,
appears after every ray of blithe.
One can only grasp the consept of Pain,
when the full story is known.
To the rest..
Its a joke.
I stare in to oblivion wielding a heavy heart.
My understanding of my actions is no longer clear.
So in return, I match confusion with anger.
My anger is blind and
turns all forms of admiration into crisp snow flakes.
I find myself lost without consciousness of values.
The steel is cold
as is the snowballing effect i find myself in.
Deep, Dark & Depressing. I know. I'M NOT EMO!!!!!
Retaliation At Its Best
Posted 17 years agoSo I got to be destructive! YAAAAAY!! A years worth of anger that was bottled up just got released. I feel so much better. Sorry about the Apt. though. lol NOT! Anyway, heres a tip for all the guys out there that like to abuse a good relationship:
All the girl could want was a little attention
From a man who's strong and not to mention
Kiss and caressing her all night long wooooaaahh
But all that boy wants is to hit and run off
He and his friends-they sit and they laugh
Going around talking 'bout the girls they used in the past
U gotta get what's comin' to u
For all the bad, bad things u do to your
Lady, treat her like a lady
U'll make a good girl crazy
If u don't treat her like a lady
go go go goes around, comes around, go go!
HEAR IT
She stopped going to church, she don't wanna go to school
She left with anger when he took her for a fool
Even though her friends tell her to just keep cool
Didn't tell her from the start just what he had planned
Right in her face with another woman
Now she's in jail for attacking her man
U gotta get what's comin' to u
For all the bad, bad things u do to your
Lady, treat her like a lady
U'll make a good girl crazy
If u don't treat her like a lady
Lady, treat her like a lady
U'll make a good girl crazy
If u don't treat her like a lady
go go go goes around, comes around, go go!
Treat her like a lady
GO What goes around, comes around, go!
What goes around, comes around, go go!
Tell it to her straight, she can take the truth
Don't lead her on and on and leave her confused
Anyone would rather be alone than be used
Don't sit and think you'll hurt her feelings
She only wants to know just what the deal is
Next time beware of who's heart your breaking
U gotta get what's comin' to u
For all the bad, bad things u do to your
Lady, treat her like a lady
U'll make a good girl crazy
If u don't treat her like a lady
Lady, treat her like a lady
U'll make a good girl crazy
If u don't treat her like a lady
Lady, treat her like a lady
U'll make a good girl crazy (I'M IN LOVE)
If u don't treat her like a lady (WHAT GOES AROUND COMES AROUND)
Lady, treat her like UR lady (TREAT HER LIKE A LADY)
U'll make a good girl crazy
If u don't treat her like a lady
Lady, treat her like a lady
U'll make a good girl crazy
If u don't treat her like a lady
So onto Razi Island I go! ^^
All the girl could want was a little attention
From a man who's strong and not to mention
Kiss and caressing her all night long wooooaaahh
But all that boy wants is to hit and run off
He and his friends-they sit and they laugh
Going around talking 'bout the girls they used in the past
U gotta get what's comin' to u
For all the bad, bad things u do to your
Lady, treat her like a lady
U'll make a good girl crazy
If u don't treat her like a lady
go go go goes around, comes around, go go!
HEAR IT
She stopped going to church, she don't wanna go to school
She left with anger when he took her for a fool
Even though her friends tell her to just keep cool
Didn't tell her from the start just what he had planned
Right in her face with another woman
Now she's in jail for attacking her man
U gotta get what's comin' to u
For all the bad, bad things u do to your
Lady, treat her like a lady
U'll make a good girl crazy
If u don't treat her like a lady
Lady, treat her like a lady
U'll make a good girl crazy
If u don't treat her like a lady
go go go goes around, comes around, go go!
Treat her like a lady
GO What goes around, comes around, go!
What goes around, comes around, go go!
Tell it to her straight, she can take the truth
Don't lead her on and on and leave her confused
Anyone would rather be alone than be used
Don't sit and think you'll hurt her feelings
She only wants to know just what the deal is
Next time beware of who's heart your breaking
U gotta get what's comin' to u
For all the bad, bad things u do to your
Lady, treat her like a lady
U'll make a good girl crazy
If u don't treat her like a lady
Lady, treat her like a lady
U'll make a good girl crazy
If u don't treat her like a lady
Lady, treat her like a lady
U'll make a good girl crazy (I'M IN LOVE)
If u don't treat her like a lady (WHAT GOES AROUND COMES AROUND)
Lady, treat her like UR lady (TREAT HER LIKE A LADY)
U'll make a good girl crazy
If u don't treat her like a lady
Lady, treat her like a lady
U'll make a good girl crazy
If u don't treat her like a lady
So onto Razi Island I go! ^^
Are U Friend Or Foe?
Posted 17 years agoSo i bought a kitty! but.. I cant keep him. He's so cute and little and looks like a cat i once had, all gray with white on him. I named him Leon after Leon Kennedy from Resident Evil 4 *blushes* Hes so dreamy... yeah, Anyway, I bought him because me and my x were talkin about getting one for his new apartment. It was more like i brought up the idea and i bought leon for him. There was another one that was fluffy and long haired that i wanted but he wanted him so i wasn't going to argue. but its a kitten, cute is a garauntee!
Well, i tried my hardest to make things work. But he who throws rocks in glass house is not wise. And the way he is, "sometimes I guess there aren't enough rocks" - Forrest Gump. He spread a big lie about me at work (yes we work together, not smart) so after that public trashing, i cant show my face there and actually hold my head up high.
I guess this is the time for me to continue building my bridge across to Razi island lol. How could i have been so blind? My knight in shinning armor has been sitting out infront of my house with that poor bleach white horse who probably died from mal-nutrition a long time ago. The bouque of flowers he was holding have died and withered away too. Its the thought that counts though, lol.
I just dont know anymore. I wish things could go back to the way they were back in the day when she actually came home with him and the four of us would sit and play video games and talk. Not saying i dont like where I am right now but I dont. Its not the same and I cant go back in time. I just have to move on with what i have. That always works right?
This time around I am going to make sure I dont let anyone get under my skin that much to where i dont know if they are friend or foe. Lets hope it works.. Again.
***Oh yeah and BTW, I have plenty of new pictures i would love to submit and i'm trying to get them up but I am technilogically challanged right now.
Well, i tried my hardest to make things work. But he who throws rocks in glass house is not wise. And the way he is, "sometimes I guess there aren't enough rocks" - Forrest Gump. He spread a big lie about me at work (yes we work together, not smart) so after that public trashing, i cant show my face there and actually hold my head up high.
I guess this is the time for me to continue building my bridge across to Razi island lol. How could i have been so blind? My knight in shinning armor has been sitting out infront of my house with that poor bleach white horse who probably died from mal-nutrition a long time ago. The bouque of flowers he was holding have died and withered away too. Its the thought that counts though, lol.
I just dont know anymore. I wish things could go back to the way they were back in the day when she actually came home with him and the four of us would sit and play video games and talk. Not saying i dont like where I am right now but I dont. Its not the same and I cant go back in time. I just have to move on with what i have. That always works right?
This time around I am going to make sure I dont let anyone get under my skin that much to where i dont know if they are friend or foe. Lets hope it works.. Again.
***Oh yeah and BTW, I have plenty of new pictures i would love to submit and i'm trying to get them up but I am technilogically challanged right now.
Under My Skin
Posted 17 years agoIve been lost in a sea of thoughts,
reminising on what it was like to once have my boat and oar, my happiness and self worth. Now I float with only the feeling of black, indistinguishable emptiness to be my guide. My northern star has burned out and I find myself drowning in the drinking ghord. The sea rages as chaos takes control of the elements working against me creating my storm. Its no Cast Away story, there is no island to wash up on. Its no folk song, there are no candles in the window to show safe haven. I float on aimlessly as the waves around me crash and cast over me, sucking me into the undertow without warning. No air to breathe, my lungs fill up with water plagued with disease, pollution and oil. Gasping out for that life raft to plow through the water but never does.. Opening my eyes, I can see the turmoil around me hightening to an incredible creshendo but I cant feel it. I dont hear it. Think of my life raft that will never be there agian, I'm peaceful. The only aura presenting its self is that illuminating from my inner want to live through this terreble storm. A break in the clouds, a sihlouete of light beams down. Warmth engulfs my sea. Like the touch of the heavens to a demon suffering from its pain, it stops. My thoughs stop racing; My will ceases to exhist. There I float, a survivor of the storm. Or am I? Need To Know Basis
Posted 17 years agoYou ever notice when you let info leak out to people or a person, it always runs up bites you in the butt? I've decided I'm keeping everyone on a need to know basis as in, no you dont need to know. It seems like once I have found my head lost in the clouds someone always has to grab, it suck all the hellium out and leave me to fly around aimlessly then hit the ground. Yes that was a horrible metaphor for a balloon. ^^
Anyway, if it hasn't been noticed, I'm really open for commissions. I guess after I get some more submissions posted there will be more examples of my work but I NEED MONEY!!!!! And i like to draw for people so.
Work sucks. lookin for a new job, I hate Fuddruckers! I will never come eat at this place again cept if i'm going to come in, buy something, then make a scene and get kicked out. Thats only if jerk face is working.
Anyway, if it hasn't been noticed, I'm really open for commissions. I guess after I get some more submissions posted there will be more examples of my work but I NEED MONEY!!!!! And i like to draw for people so.
Work sucks. lookin for a new job, I hate Fuddruckers! I will never come eat at this place again cept if i'm going to come in, buy something, then make a scene and get kicked out. Thats only if jerk face is working.
WOOT!
Posted 17 years agoYay!! I donno what to put for my first journal but... WOOT! YAY!!
