So I'm switching to a new account here on FA because this one is just...well honestly it's because I hate the name but also I feel like I'm sort of moving on to a new era of myself. More details in the journal on that account.

If you want to still keep up to date and stuff and in touch on FA, then +watch me over at http://www.furaffinity.net/user/MAVADOFOX/ ^_^

I'm derping it up lately and waiting for classes to start so going to throw another journal out there.

Considering starting a new fuzzy project with the left over fuzz I have left over. Either I am thinking of making a giant freaking body sized tail pillow kinda thing or a super long one. I'm not sure which to do so let me know your opinion and I'll go by what everyone else thinks.

Aside from work and school killing my spirit and energy, I have been having a great time going out with Tomtom. ^_^ After spending the whole time I was down in Atlanta with him for Dragoncon, I feel like we're getting to know each other a lot better. I'm so glad the way things are going and how things seem to be unfolding lately.

I'm still battling some charges from during DragonCon that set me back over 100 dollars, but it should be fixed by tomorrow hopefully.

I received my poi necklace in the mail over the weekend and I love it. Sadly it came with a scratch across the pendant but I am not sure if I want to send it back and wait all that time for them to send out another. They're limited to only 100 total to sell and surprisingly, mine is only the 6th that they sold...pretty weird. They're fabulous and amazingly tribal. I love it.

Overall, things are going fantastic. It's wonderful how love can smooth over all the little things that get in the way in life. ^_^

Boredom makes foxies think. With the filters kicked up many many notches at my college, I'm forced to fiddle with things I would overlook almost every day. One thing I'm noticing is that the CD I ordered a bit ago, Sound Virus by Nick Wood, actually has a few more gems in there along with the original tracks that I bought it for. I suppose it just takes the right attitude and environment to see/hear some thing. This is helping in my quest of finding music to inspire me to spin in new ways I originally would not. With the discovery of a funky western four on the floor track and other slow, serene tracks and even an inspiring and cheerful african style chant, I think when I get home this evening I am going to enjoy spinning again.

I'm beginning to realize how much school and work are going to be cutting into my social life I had this summer and it makes me terribly saddened. With even more desire to spend time with those close to me, my apathy for school work is soaring to new heights. Hopefully I can overcome this and continue to work to bring my GPA up over these months to come.

Even through all of these semesters of money thrown at education, my other dreams continue to hide behind these expected goals set by others that I am to achieve first.

Kissed any one of your Facebook friends? --- No
Been arrested? --- No
Kissed someone you didn't like? --- Yes
Slept in until 5 PM? --- Yes
Fallen asleep at work/school? --- Yes
Ran a red light? --- Yes
Been suspended from school? --- Yes
Experienced love at first sight? --- No
Totalled your car in an accident? --- No
Been fired from a job? --- No
Fired somebody? --- No
Sang karaoke? --- No
Pointed a gun at someone? --- Yes
Done something you told yourself you wouldn't? --- Yes
Laughed until something you were drinking came out your nose? --- Yes
Caught a snowflake on your tongue? --- Yes
Kissed in the rain? --- No
Had a close brush with death (your own)? --- No
Seen someone die? --- No
Played spin-the-bottle? --- No
Sang in the shower? --- Yes
Smoked a cigar? --- No
Sat on a rooftop? --- Yes
Taken pictures of yourself naked? --- No
Been pushed into a pool with all your clothes? --- No
Skipped school? --- Yes
Eaten a bug? --- Yes
Sleepwalked? --- No
Walked a moonlit beach? --- No
Ridden a motorcycle? --- Yes
Dumped someone? --- No
Forgotten your anniversary? --- No
Lied to avoid a ticket? --- No
Ridden on a helicopter? --- No
Shaved your head? --- Yes
Blacked out from drinking? --- No
Played a prank on someone? --- Yes
Hit a home run? --- No
Felt like killing someone? --- Yes
Cross-dressed? --- Yes
Been falling-down drunk? --- No
Made your girlfriend/boyfriend cry? --- No
Eaten snake? --- No
Marched/Protested? --- No
Had Mexican jumping beans for pets? --- No
Puked on amusement ride? --- No
Seriously & intentionally boycotted something? --- Yes
Been in a band? --- No
Knitted? --- No
Been on TV? --- No
Shot a gun? --- Yes
Skinny-dipped? --- No
Caused someone to need stitches? --- No
Ridden a surfboard? --- No
Drank straight from a liquor bottle? --- No
Had surgery? --- No
Streaked? --- No
Taken by ambulance to hospital? --- No
Passed out when not drinking? --- Yes
Peed on a bush? --- Yes
Donated Blood? --- No
Grabbed electric fence? --- Yes
Eaten alligator meat? --- No
Eaten cheesecake? --- Yes
Eaten kids' Halloween candy? --- Yes
Killed an animal when not hunting? --- No
Peed your pants in public? --- No
Written graffiti? --- No
Still love someone you shouldn't? --- No
Think about the future? --- Yes
Been in handcuffs? --- Yes
Believe in love? --- Yes
Sleep on a certain side of the bed? --- Yes

It takes being stuck on campus waiting for a class for me to remember to do these damn journals I suppose. The network on this campus seems to be a lot more strict than I remember. It is blocking sites now with reporting reasons such as them being "Hobby/Interest, Music, Reference Site..." At what point will they stop so I can waste my time more inefficiently? Furry pronz remain fine apparently while Pandora is taboo.

Either way, time for some news:

I've been seeing someone rather interesting lately. ^_^ Been out a few times now and had a great date. Despite being exhausted I enjoyed it very much. *wags* Very eager to hang out with him again soon. It's odd when Sunday-Tuesday feels like a whole week of not seeing someone.

I still am being super lazy about the fursuit, although recently I've been thinking of getting my damn tail to work on it and have it done and not super duper derpy hopefully by FWA2011. I'd love to be able to frolic around in suit this coming year and spin some poi in it.

Along the lines of poi, I've not really learned much new stuff as far as that goes. Been trying to incorporate pendulums and more gradual stalls into some of my impromptu spinning, but sadly I'm failing at splitting my brain to make each do what they're supposed to most of the time. Out of nowhere we got some local furs that like poi, and I'm super excited about it because now I can has a spinning buddy! Now I just have to figure out how to teach spinning....erf.

Overall, things have been turning towards the bright side, not to say I was in a dark spot, but it's just getting more bright....brighter? I don't care. Erf. I'm just happy about really everything that has been coming up recently and enjoying all the socializing and love from all of my furry homies.

Whoops, there I go again trying to maintain some sort of journal like function and forgetting about it. That is usually the reason I feel apathetic about trying to keep regularity in journals.

Either way, things are going alright. Still struggling my way through at work to put up with the customers while I earn slightly less than nothing. With our newest store manager things are going in a good direction. We're actually making progress on the things we were behind on!

The fursuit is definitely on hold as I have given up on trying to make things. I'm currently saving up money the best I can although my car just decided it's going to ask me for all that I have saved. Perhaps if I can find enough motivation and desire I will scrimp and save enough to get a head done, and hopefully that will give me the drive to do the rest of it since that is what mostly is intimidating me.

My spinning is also at a standstill. Currently I just feel completely uninspired. There are new moves and patterns for me to learn, but I just feel that all I do is just pattern after pattern after pattern... sort of like I've lost any style that I had. I recently bought Sound Virus by Nick Wood hoping some of the tracks would get me in the mood to spin, but no dice. Perhaps when I finally do the fire I will get some sort of groove back.

And last on my mind is the theme for this week on FA. Fat bunnies.... I don't get it. Is there some sort of joke behind it? A history or story that makes it relevant? I doubt it has anything to do with the season currently... I just find it a bit odd to be honest. The whole fascination with obesity has baffled me for a while. When I see ladies riding the motor scooters in walmart and the fat on their elbows makes what resembles a shwa, I frown and also kind of throw up a little bit in my mouth. Perhaps it is I that lacks the....whatever you may call it to find this theme interesting. All I know is that it is kind of disgusting to think about too much if I mull on it.

Well the trip was neat. Saw some neat cosplay folk and realized that furries truely aren't the bottom of the totem pole online. The dances were pretty bad....it seems anime people can't really dj either. Something about just playing stupid pop trendy songs and using windows media player as a backdrop makes me enjoy not going to those things regularly. Thank you Foxglove for having me over and showing me around your town.

I'm a little sad, I'll no longer be a teenager in about a week. Looks like I have to get back to being mature soon.

Other than that, the con inspired me to work on my fursuit a bit more. Since the head is so intimidating to me I'm going to do the body instead I guess. Maybe when I find a new job I'll just commission a head....I really don't want to do it.

Also, be sure to check out the video we made on Saturday night of AZ: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=AUrnX3vU4Dc&playnext_from=TL&videos=j1ja8vuDs7I&feature=sub

Currently, I'm still having the best day in like ever it seems for me, despite a 9 hour shift at work stocking all day and doing the truck.

Turns out that good someone I had on my horizon showed some similar feelings of affection towards me. I'm so eager to visit him next week! *explodes into fluff*

Aside from that, I passed all my classes I didn't drop, and now out for summer. *wags* Only way I could be happier is if it was next week already.

On a recent episode of 30 Rock on NBC, they decided to show how awful a character's choices of men is just awful and finished off the list by introducing another character. I think the actual lines from the show represent how well the media is at attacking us:
Male - "Now may I tell you something? I'm a plushy."
Female - "Is that a fraternity?"
Male - "Kind of. It means I belong to a group of like-minded people who dress up in mascot costumes and have orgies in hotel rooms and state parks. Our term for intercourse is yiffing."

Pardon me while I rage elsewhere.

Forgot about trying to keep these things regular.

Either way, semester is almost over, which is good, I suppose. This semester was almost as bad as my first. Pretty much nuking my calc quizzes so I'm probably going to squeek by with a C if I'm lucky on my final. As for the english class, the teacher expects so much from me because I set the bar high apparently on our first writing assignment....I dug my own grave. I can't muster that much motivation and effort this late in the year!

As for other things. I've got my eye set on a few things lately. Just waiting around for time to pass so I can afford to get my pair of fire poi and the safety doo-dads I need so I don't risk dieing when I light up. Aside from material things, I also kinda got my eye set on someone, but that's going to take some time to chase that notion.

The fursuit is on pause right now while I procrastinate and do everything else I possibly can until that is all that is left. Using my lost needle as a reason to put it off instead.

Overall, in a grey period currently. It could go either way from here but I can feel it being a little biased. We'll see, just got to give it some time and then maybe I can be definite about something and smite my boring bleh-ness.

Ok, so I'm nearing the end of packing. Got my hygienic artillery ready so I won't stink up the hotel like some furries...ahem. Aside from that got my clothes ready and stuff and finally finished getting my glowsticks, poi, and string ready. I swear, if I drop the bag they're in, it will blind someone with the glowyness. Pretty much all that is left is finding the camera, which I think my sister has, getting a map to the hotel, and then finding my roomies. Tails are already in the car, along with mah badge and collar and stuff so thats fine. I'm trying to go through my head to see if i'm forgetting anything....

Anyways I still need to find a reason to tell my parents I'm going to be gone for the next 4 nights....I'm sure they won't notice honestly until like saturday.

Holy crap! First con starts tomorrow! WEEE!

I have so much to pack still. Need to figure out all the panels and events I wanna attend there and stuffs too. I'm so freaking excited, even in this psuedo voodoo economics with the female Ben Stein. Must.....hold back......woo's of excitement!!!!!.....

So since my suit won't be done for a while cus i'm poor again still, I was thinking of entering furries got talent instead....but apparently I think I needed to talk to someone in charge of the event a little ago....bleh. Either way I'll still have my glowsticks and tail so I couldn't be happier!

So I'm starting to realize a trend lately in the music that I'm spinning to...it all seems to be contemporary stuff. This is giving me ideas though that perhaps I should look into taking some contemporary intro dance classes if theres any nearby.....That would be awesome in my opinion.

FWA is right around the corner....and it looks like I'm going to have to take a chunk out of my funds for it to get those GL Ultras for the con. Oh well though I guess.

So I think I should probably charge for making tails from now on. Apparently people like my tails that I've been making so I think I'm going to throw some pictures up on here sometime and get into doing that while I try to recover financially after this con. (On a side note from the tails, if anyone wants a white, offwhite, or orange tail by FWA, let me know like by this weekend and I should be able to crank it out real fast by then.)

So I've realized if I want to be able to afford really anything at FWA this year i'm going to have to not make my head. Minimum wage + part time = poor foxes. Conclusively, this means I'm going to have to postpone entering my favorite part of the con and just watch I suppose...*sad face*

Other than that, I'm working on a tail for Doodlewolfdude . I should have this done by tuesday I'm hoping if I can get motivated to do my paper for english comp real fast tomorrow.

So bleh. On an optimistic side, maybe someone will like Doodle's tail and ask me to pump out one real fast before FWA for them. That'd be neat I suppose, hehe. Who knows, maybe I could get the guts/humility to ask someone if I could enter the competition in their suit....though I highly doubt it, it seems like it would be asking a LOT.

FWA meme

Where are you staying?

Currently I'm going to be rooming with Katmandu still and possibly others if they decide to join in.

Who will you be with?

Probably just the local furs and stuffs. I'll have to check around to see if any far away buddies are coming down for the con.

Do you do trades?

I has nothing to trade.

What suits will you have?

I'm hoping like hell to have my own suit done by then....the head is so complicated.

What is your gender?

Male

How old are you?

19

Can I talk to you?

Ofcourse, unless you've been told otherwise. >.>

Can I buy you a drink?

I dun drink. I'm a good boy. ^_^

What's your poison?

Coffee? Or maybe Mtn Dew....or Drain-o.

Can I commission you?

I don't have much to offer but I'd be willing to teach some furs a little poi.

What events will you be attending?

Not entirely too sure exactly what but I'm so freaking excited for the dance competition.

Have you visited the website?[furryweekend.com]

Yes, have you?

If you were in the Rock Band tournament[http://www.furaffinity.net/view/3479850], what would your band name be?

The Game

What would you play?

I only played that game a little bit a few years ago but I had fun with the drums.

Can I hug you?

Ofcourse, unless you are a leper.

How tall are you?

5'10" ish.

Are you nice? Or do you think so (no personal references needed)?

I hope I'm nice. I try to be kind to everyone but sometimes I can get really snarky and sarcastic.

Are you friendly?

I'm a bit reserved and shy at times.

How long are you going?

I only have a room for Fri-Sun but hopefully I can find somewhere to crash for Thursday night.

Do you have an artist table?

No but I has a coffee table. <.<

Do you like parties?

Sometimes. I like smaller groups usually of people and not a big fan of drunken commotion.

If I see you, how should I get your attention?

Say my name, Mavado, squeak my tail I suppose.

It's almost here, and I'm excited! It's going to be my first con ever and I'm so excited. Sadly I missed pre-registration because I lost my wallet when I could afford to spare the money and still be able to get gas for school. I'm trying to figure out if I can go down on the thursday and register then or if I have to do it on friday.

Aside from the registration issue, I got my room sorted out and stuff. I'm going to be staying with Katmandu, not sure if anyone else is sharing the room though.

I'm so very excited for the con, but I do not think I'll have my suit ready by then unless I can get some major help making the head. I've finished the tail and halfway there with the handpaws being finished. If anyone is willing to help me out with the head I would love that so very much and compensate you if you like, I'd really love to have this ready for FWA.

Aside from FWA that is about all the interesting stuff. I am going to be ordering some GL Ultras and 5-min glowsticks to bring to the con. For once I'll have sticks that are bright and not boring cheap-o dull ones.

Finally, I have a badge being commissioned by RaggedyHatter for FWA. Going to be my first badge ever, I'm excited for it. ^_^

My big problem is finally culled down into a little ball of resent, regret, and repelling my confidence. It's been almost a year now since it began and it's going to keep present in my life for a long time...but luckily I'm now able to act above the effects of this problem and pretend my way to normal. It began as something fantastic, amazingly joyous, grew into something awkward an uncomfortable, and then into the final stages was mind wrecking painful and emotionally debilitating. Sadly, I must force it to remain in these final stages and be happy in life for the sake of everything else. In the long run, I can dream and reminisce of the earlier times, although that is all. One day I may be able to move on up to 90% from this problem, but it's always going to be stuck within my memories and leaving that metaphorical bittersweet taste in my heart. So here is to regret, scars, and hope...cheers.

Just something simple before I write up something I've been meaning to for a while:

Currently I'm recovering from the flu I had from late the night before Valentine's Day and throughout the weekend. I'm doing better, lost a few pounds and slipped down to 98.8 which was a bit scary. Thankfully, I am just left with a cough at this time and no more migraine like I had at the meet last night, though with the many hits I received to the head did not help it go away.

The fur is now in the mail and being shipped to me to get started on my suit, although I've yet to still get an idea what I want to do for the patterns of orange on my suit. Hopefully, the bolts of fur don't tip anyone off at my house anymore than they know already. If anyone is willing to help me put together ideas for the suit I would love the help, I'm insanely indecisive.

Finally, I'll throw in that I am no longer hung up on a subject that I have been for a long time. It has gotten to the point that I have begun to see some truths through the things I have seen in it. This should generally be leading to a happier Mavado, but we'll just have to wait and see how it unfolds and if anything collapses.

.....I hate you school, stop making me write in a fucking 5 paragraph style....stupid writing nazis.

First a few good things I suppose:
I found out that Nick Woolsey, my favorite poi artist, only has about a year and a half on his ban from coming back to the U.S. Been watching a few of his other videos from street performances and they're always entertaining.
I'm fairly sure I'm going to be starting to order fur whenever I get my next paycheck from Hell. This means I'll get to start making parts for my fursuit. I think I have settled on it being an ivory/offwhite main body with pure/snow white underbelly and stuff and then on the tips of the ears and tail and other places I'm going to have little orange accents and stuff. I'm still considering implementing poi patterns into the fur but we'll see....
As far as school goes, I'm hopeful. First Calc test this semester did not seem to go awful, although I blanked on one question but nailed the bonus so I think it evened out. History is still equivalent of Voodoo Economics with Ben Stein... And my english composition teacher is still a biggot and west-texan stuck-up old hag.
For the thing I'm trying to push beyond... Essentially I'm hitting some emotional barriers still like I have been over the past....long while I guess. I'll move on, eventually, hehe. For now I'm trying to just push the feelings down into a little ball, but that ball is acting like an emotional kidney stone.
Overall, things are good. ^_^

Thought I might as well write a few of these little journal doodads and give it a shot.

Lately I've been practicing a bit harder with my poi to get a few things down that have been eluding me. Recently I've gotten a good hang on between the leg turns coming from the outside. Been being able to link it into a BTB weave which is always fun and even into meltdowns. Aside from the countless close calls I am happy to see myself progressing and being able to spin more smoothly.

To go along with my little poi progressions I have been working on my fursona a bit better. I think I have almost pinned it down as for the colors, patterns, and all those fiddly bits. Going to start looking for someone to help me make a reference sheet soon before I order up the fur to make the suit.

Off to work now at the store of ZERO respect, Dollar Tree, and heres to hoping I will remember about this journal thingy unlike all the others I've ever done.