Go fuck yourself with a cactus, please and thank you

If you can take 45 minutes and listen to this album you if like metal and a great band http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=msM_4uznjAg

About 10-15 minutes ago I slammed and wedged my finger in my refrigerator door, now my finger is swollen and is hurting like hell. Not even a week ago I burned my hand getting a waffle out of my toaster-oven. How the hell these events happened I don't know but it sucks most incredibly.

Over the pas two months or so shit has hit the fan completely with my life.
First my girlfriend broke up with me then I get accused and charged with an offense.
Here's a poem I that thought up last night-

I breathe, but I do not truly live
I move, but I do not do anything
I tell myself I'm alive, but am I really?

Sorry about this, I needed to vent a bit

Is anyone willing to help me learn various drawing and shading styles? I want to work on art but I just don't have the skills. If your willing to help email or Skype is the fastest way to reach me

I was at the Detroit zoo earlier with my family for some kind of of Christmas light exhibit and they had barely half the zoo open. My main question is why they didn't have the arctic area open, I mean seriously, it's almost winter right? I wanted to see the damn arctic foxes.

Has anyone read Dante's A Divine Comedy?

I was at lunch earlier today with the few friends I have, one of whom I have strong feels for and while we were walking to lunch she hugged me and locked her arm in mine. During that I smiled at her, she said that she had never seen me actually smile(I haven't truly smiled in a long time), then she asked why I was smiling, I replied by saying that it was her. During lunch and after she almost completely ignored me, which of course pissed me off a bit. I can't understand it at all.

If anyone wants to talk about anything I'll listen, my email is mcfurryfur[at]Gmail.com and my Skype is listed below. I say I hate talking yet I talk ALOT

As I sit alone and cold, I wonder what I did to drive them away, what did I say? What did I do? Why do they all run away? No one wants to be around me for longer than a minute, fuck everything I don't need people. All I need is my music playlist and a few cases of Monster. Why do I think anyone gives a shit?

Halloween is the one time of the of year where I seem "normal", I hate it. I hated tonight a lot more because I'm on some new meds and I feel horrid.

With a heart bound by ache,
Though it doesn't beat it breaks,
I am cursed!
I sew my eyes shut just to sleep
No sonnet for the recently deceased
- Motionless in White

I listen to what people call "bad" music, meaning that they don't understand it. This pisses me of greatly because when try to tell them the lyrics they just ignore me and tell me that the rappers and pop artists they listen to are "inspirational" and "life saving", I just sneeze and say I'm allergic to bullshit. The bands I like have some really good songs with really good lyrics, why won't people open their damn mind before their mouth. So what if the lyrics aren't understanlbe to them, that's why they'res websites for song lyrics, maybe this helps to explain why I'm rejected by people a lot.

I have been good friends with someone for almost five years and that friendship is almost gone due to the fact that my friend won't open his mind before his mouth, he hates almost everything I enjoy. He especially hates the furry fandom because he thinks we are all sex crazed creeps. I have tried explaining to him but he won't let me utter a single word, I told him to open his mind before his mouth or get the fuck out if my way. If he keeps this up our friendship is gone, but it doesn't matter to me. I have had so many people abondon me that I don't keep many friends, I currently have only two, maybe three people that I actually trust. It seems like the world is against me right now. I don't know how much longer I can fight this one sided battle. If someone has a something going on with them and they tell me, I do my best to help. The reason why? I don't want to see anyone become depressed and so on.

Last week was my schools homecoming week, we were asked to do something different each day, they were only ten, maybe a few more, who didn't do it. I was one of them, it seems so pointless to me, why is that even a thing? Who came up with the idea? Why am I questioning this?

I find that staying organized is a major pain in the ass, that was literally true today. I was in one of my classes and I had to get up, I naturally shove my pen in my coat pocket, instead today I put it in my back pants pocket. I got done with what I needed to do and I sat back down only to have my pen jam into my ass, phrases taken literally are rarely fun as I had come to learn the hard way.

I love discovering new things and over the past few hours I've been researching animal symbolism and found out a lot about it, thus so I found out that the fox is mine and it makes sense for who I am. Learning about this has changed my thinking about things greatly, I don't know if that will affect anything or not