Just had that thing again where someone opens Slots for commissions and it was in the middle in the night (seen from my timezone) and when i get up everything is up because the other people in the right timezone got all the slots. I just can't sit there all night pressing F5. Or beeing at work and bidding on a YCH that needs to be paid directly after winning the slot, hey i have construction sites that are sometimes deep into a industrial complex and can't look at my phone hoping have access and using paypal from there.

So i hope AI Image Generators will get to a point where i can just upload a picture of my 'sona and tell it "make a picture of me riding my toy quad" and it just works. I don't have any pity for artists, especially for arrogant ones. Once i wanted a inflatable toy design made and that one told me no i dont make designs for publics runs anymore. Suddenly from the same guy a toy came up made my Horseplay. Aha, soso, i don't do designs for other but my special friends blabla. Next time just tell me that how it is. But you wont dso that any longer soon when that AI thing starts off (Also i can use the chinese manufacturers for a design). When AI gets better i dont need you anymore. Go, away.

They all cry for regulating the AI technology only after they see their jobs go down the drain. The same for musical artists. I just got a Fursona themed Italo Disco Song made for free by a machine, the same song would probably cost 300,- made by a person. And i just don't feel any empathy because when productionline (blue collar jobs) went down the drain the same people told the now jobless "haha, you better went to uni and college and learned a good job" and now where the studied jobs can go down the drain, or the jobs that need talent, suddenly they want regulation, but nobody cared when it was from the lower class people the jobs because of automation. I feel malicious joy for these so nice and proud studied people learning what it is when you get replaced by a machine.

this is something I have for years now since I was a teen. Little kids will get all kinds of attention shoved but their ass but its never me. Like, when I'm outside withy kettcar. When i irde it im just that weirdest when a kid has a toy like this people tell how a good race car driver he will be when he grows up. Nobody says I'm a good race car driver I'm just the one parents approach because they want to borrow my toys for their fucking kids. And when I say no sometimes they get angry because the child will be crying the rest of the day, but nobody would give me the toys of their kids for me to play.

Its the same with all my huge adult kids toys. Sometimes when I'm in a good mood I let one borrow my pool toy. Then their parents pull them around and tell them how a good dragon rider they are. Nobody of them tells that to me, even after I lend them my toy nor somebody would pull me. I get really sad about it and when I tell people about it im the weirdo again. When I want to be the best dragon rider and someone tells me how good I am riding my dragon people tell me to go to therapy. But I dont want to have that wish removed I wanna live that out. Its like it would be such a hustle people would be like that to me. But no, these toys belong to me but the good dragon rider or tiger tamer isn't me. Sometimes on events they even get a little certificate that says how a good kettcar race driver they are but i can't even participate because these events are for kids only, even when I bring my own kart.

Im so sad right now, its like im just worthless and my only use is to give my toys to other people to entertain their kids while getting kicked my ass.

I removed omst of my inflatable videos from Youtube. First, they been all turned to 18+ only, even when only riding in the pool or inflating. And also they kept turning up together with popping videos, and i'm sick of that trash. I removed all of them and going to put them onto my upcomming website www.aufblastiere.online (aufblastiere is the german term for inflatable animals). Also Youtube is adding ads on videos i own but i dont get the money for it because im no partner. Webspace and traffic is that kind of cheap nowadays that i can put all these on my own sites and keep the revenue for myself when there should be any. Youtube had it time when it was expensive to put videos online.

So i've had this uncanny dream the other night. Beside there where alot of weird events like having snow in summer in that dream there was something special where my subconscious self was playing with my deepst wishes and desires and makes me sad and afraid until now.

I had a teddy bear that went to be alive. Like a regular teddy bear that gained self awareness and started to be friends with me. For a very short period in my dream i had all i wished for. A funy, fluffy, friend that plays and romps along with me. Weird things where happening like there was a sequenze where Jimy Hendrix, Michael Jackson and the guy with the moustache from queen where dancing in a disco hall with that disco ball hanging from the ceiling. There where sequences wher ei was with that bear in the woods running arround and all. But after that dancing hall sequence it got all dark. Suddenly the colorful wood we where playing in turned into a half-dark and empty industrial hall. It was like the power of something was turning down. In that huge hall i was sitting on the ground with that teddy bear in front of me. But he changed. His fur was hanging from his face revealing that he was in fact an animatronic toy. The eyes where dark, greyish, and staring in my direction and now not moving anymore and the friendly glow was gone. He wasnt talking anymore and his jaws where just closed. Not even the fur was loose also the withe plastic that was his head made made of was peeling from the housing. There was still some noise comming from him, i looked onto his back and i could see alot of mechanical parts, motors and plastic gears still moving and grinding. I was shocked. Not only shocked i was hardly desillusioned. This was where i started to wake up and while lying in the bed it took a long time to understand that i was not dreaming anymore. But i was afraid still. In panic i was checking where my tigger plush was and was relived he was still there and still how i knew him. And my others also where there.

This took place the night from the 5th to the 6st of August, so it just happened. And since then i'm figuring why i dream this.

The details of the defect teddy bear must come from me interest in the vintage 80s toy "Teddy Ruxpin", that toy
was a story telling bear that could move his jaws and eyes while telling stories recorded onto tape using a tape player in his back. The tapes had the audio recorded and control tones to control the jaw and eye movement. Like a tiny Disney Audio-Animatronic for Homeuse (The inentor was in fact a former disney employee).

But why does my brain produce with, why does it let me have fun first and suddenly let me down and be really sad and afraid. It was like someone decided to let myself go and let me live in a colorful but faked and wrong toon world for a short moment and then give me the shock of seeing the truth behind that short moment of happyness.

It also plays with my interest in how disney attractions work but at the same time i dont want to know it to not destroy the magic. Here this happened.

Now when i was writing this down we had the night from the 06st to the 8st and i dont want to go to bed. I'm still recovering from that dream and i'm sad about that bear. I had some nice moments and suddenly i'm that kind of sad.

So i try to eat out alone for some time but i'm at this point really sad and frustrated. You call and ask and suddenly when you tel them youre alone all the tables are reserved. And that is just not fair. I don't care if a familiy of four brings more money so they give away the free table to a family ant not to me. But i also want to eat out. But i learned that when i really get a tablet i'm not even worth getting a candle on the table. Plus all the people arround me stare because i'm on my own. I'm really sad about all that but the most that i'm not worth getting a candle lit up.
People getting out with girlfriend/boyfriend get flowers and decorations set and i get my meal and thats it. And since corona its even more complicated because they have less tables because of distancing. And when you get a table for one you are in some corner at the restrooms or the kitchen. I can live with alot if shit but when its about food and eating i can't stand sick jokes or shit happening. I cry about that alot. Most because of the candle, i feel like i'm just not worth the effort...

I'm upset.

I preordered Flausi the cute Reindeer and the website said they expected shipping to europe mid oct and other regions november. I shure i read that somewhere. And now the americans get flausi first even when horseplay a german company is.

Fuck that shit. One day i will have a custom that everybody wants and then there is only one toy and thats mine.

I hope they bring treble as next toy.
I hope they bring treble as next toy.
I hope they bring treble as next toy.
I hope they bring treble as next toy.
I hope they bring treble as next toy.
I hope they bring treble as next toy.
I hope they bring treble as next toy.
I hope they bring treble as next toy.
I hope they bring treble as next toy.
I hope they bring treble as next toy.

Also me:

When is speckles beeing shipped.
When is speckles beeing shipped.
When is speckles beeing shipped.
When is speckles beeing shipped.
When is speckles beeing shipped.
When is speckles beeing shipped.
When is speckles beeing shipped.

I have ordered and also paid for speckles, first i was unimpressed but then i have seen more pcitures of him and now i get one. I think he will be ready after april next year so i have something to look forward to after i come home from florida vacation that happens from 03.04 to 20.04.19 (european date notation)

After i have seen this: https://twitter.com/Rezumaruu/statu.....32534162399232 i want him even more, this boiuncyness is beyond awesome. Wanna ride and bounce him NOW.

Speckles is still on sale until mid september you can get one here: https://docs.google.com/forms/d/e/1.....urREA/viewform

Hongyi has this summer promotion with free shipping and i took the chance because the arcanine was also cheaper than usual that i got the order out now. It is going to need two to three weeks this means i can ride him this season.

Only have to sell other things so that the credit card isn't getting bad mood about me.

Currently im raging trying to get the contacts from my fucking android phone to a fucking iphone 4s. Both of these shit things are fuck shit, why i cant export all the numbers as CSV and import them as CSV or better use this fucking itunes fuck shit to fuck with the numbers and the shit. In the early years of mobile computing when i had a Palm III PDA i just put the thing in the cradle hit the button and it synced with outlook. Now i have to upload all my shit into the cloud even when the other phone is sitting beside it. A Palm could also easily sent contacts by infrared, but nooo this isnt modern hooooooooooooo!!! Lets invent a pimp shit like bluetoth that i fave to couple and dont forget to put magic sand on it and blow it with magic smoke. Then download an APP. BOA EY I HATE THIS SHIT. Now, it doesnt get easier with modern technology. BUT HEYYYY, you can use it to play a fucking game. WHEN I WANT TO PLAY A GAME I GET A GAMENBOY. I want to call someone.

And all this only because my company said its just better if i have whatsapp so we can write informations about appointments with our customers and shit.

Dont get me wrong i like electronics nut not this modern shit thats so modern it makes the normal things hard.

I want to play with something that doesnt has an cpu in it now...

The last few days i really cuddle my tigger plushie more than usual and i really feel that he is not "like a friend" but he IS a real friend to me.

I have a lot of plushies but tigger is more and more enclosed in my soul. What i enjoy most about him is that he is an antro. He can sit with me and i can put my arms arround his shoulder like i would with a real person. shure i like my other plushies also, no one is unloved of them. But tigger give me this special fuzzy feeling in my heart.

Do you think i can really be friends with my plushies? Do you call your plushies friends?

I'm at the point where i want to throw this all out. I have many inflatables that need repair but everytime i try to cleanly add a pvc strip i fuck up the whole thing. If i apply to much glue i glue everything plus the strip comes also off again, if i use less glue i still end with flueing my fingers for days but the still does leak + looks shitty and leaves me angry.

My custom toys get repairs at IW.de, i dont want to fuck them up, too. But i also have a custom (the aaron dragon) with its design errors (ears) i could dunk the whole dragon in glue and they would still leak somewhere.

I'm going to sell my non-customs because im pissed of all this.

Recently i tried to remove warning labels using nail polish remover. The testpart looked good, but the part i wanted to remove them completly failed. Now i have a huge black spot on the toy. NICE, im so happy about it...

When i get money from somewhere like a small lottery win im going to get customs of the non-customs i like and have peace.

The only thing im really looking for is my bouncing horse i have made for me by a chinese bouncy castle manufacturer.

Now excuse me i have to peel of the glue from my fingers somehow...

I dont know wh, but im sitting in my bed now and feeling really sad and lonely, also im crying right now.

When some people can watch MLP i can watch paw patrol. I got digital tv and can watch channels like nick jr and disney dx now. And they show these kind of children show in the middle of the night.

I have allready seen fanart but never seen the cartoon. I like the charackter design, but the storys is brainfucked. I have just seen a episode where they have to save the rubberducky of the chicken of the towns mayor.

Yes, i know, it was made for pre-school children but this doesnt mean that the story has to be dump. Old Cartoons like care bears had better storylines.

I also watch this in german localization, so the songs and so on are all in german and it sounds dump.

But it could be llsomethinh to like anyway. I llike chase and marshall

what ji dont like is this stupid touchscreen kayboard

As some of you know, i went to florida wirh  nightwalker, we hat a lot of fun going to disney and so on. Since friday afternoon he is back at home and i'm aline again. Tonight i cant sleep and im crying right now because i miss him really. When he was here he covered me under my blanket and he slept wirh me in the same bed. Always in the night i was shure there is someone with me. I could hear his snoring. Now there is nothing, im all allone now.

When he was with me i didnt had all these negative thoughts i have when im alone, now it all comes back.

Its going to be morning, i can hear the birds and i still had no sleep.

I real,y miss him...

Maybe someone who is reading my journal can do the following or at least know somebody.

I want to be the kid on the art of the packaging of an inflatable ride on toy. I will provide pictures of me with my toys in the water, then someone should ad the Intex the Wet Set Logos or the puffy paws Logo. Age recommendations (of course not 3 years and older but 16 or 18 and older), warnings, decorations. You know just the colorful packaging like a toy you see in the store, but with me on it.

Please write me someone how much it would be, if you would charge me something at all.

The same thing i want with my ride-on toy quad (You can see a picture in my submission), you find the original artwork on the net, i can also provide it.

thanks

a very very kindlyperson, mandewo, loaned me his huge puffy paws olf. I ever wanted a ride on this huge canine friend, now i can have him for play (and some other things, you know what) till the end of january. So he will be with me on my birthday!! yippie!!

And he is really cute, and huge and cool! He feels like magic, is bouncy and feels bigger than my draggy. It's funny that he wags his tal while riding! Can't wait for my own, one day i will have my own for shure.

This morning i noticed a Ad on InflateThemAll that Puffy has a Poll on his side for wich Toy gets a re-run, so please go to

=== http://www.puffypa.ws/site/poll/whi.....re-orders.html ===

and VOTE, i've voted for the Wolf, but i like the Husky, too. I hope both will get are-run.

by the way: YIPPIEEE YEAHHHHHHHHHHHH

I have now the most of my Inflatable Collection on Show-Case at

http://www.mytinywiki.com/index.php.....nflatable_Toys

The Pictures are all made by myself, no Pics from ebay Auctions and Online Shops (Minues the Toys in my Wishlist) to Show there real Size (And Coolness). Also i have some other things in my WIKI that could be interessting.

Shure, i also have them on InflateThemAll.com, but thats no Photos from MY Toys ;)

If you don't know the Video via InflateThemAll, this is the link of a Video i've recorded
a Week ago on the evening i got them:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mMzVRlpyaLU

He is a Amazing Toy, i dodn't Inflated him Hard as i love it more Soft and i won't damage him but still want to have a Nice ride. He is the best Toy i ever had. Somedays before i discovered a nice old Soundtrack by Limahl for the Never Ending Story, there is a Musicvideo with the Box riding Fuchur. Now i found me listen to that Song, riding my Dragon and imaging Flying with him. I cryed a little because i was so happy. Oh yeah it's the best in the World having Strong Imaginations like a Kid.