I am buying a new PC and I want to make some new music afterwards, this is a hope since things have been pretty brutal lately I might lose the place I am living in soon. Let's just hope it does not get that bad, but yeah I failed the last few years of making anything. My mindset and effort has been so low due to a lot of issues that are hard to talk about, I just want anyone who still even cares to hear from me I am gonna try some new stuff hopefully soon. Or not depending what my future looks like.

All I can say is yes I have been gone for a good long time, thing went from really bad to worse than bad. I have been dealing with not only substance abuse but also extreme chronic depression, hard to do anything when you either want to drink yourself to death or sleep for more than you are awake. I have been belittled by a lot of people for this mindset telling me I am either faking it, or I am not trying hard enough to stop being lazy and useless.

I don't like to think people would talk to me like this but this has been a 8 year thing that never stopped since then including close family and people I loved, I am trying to get my mental health back and start reinventing my own Sona as the Pathfinder Minotaur that was a brutal warlord. He has his main Minotaur form that is 7'9, but his Half fiend/Minotaur form is much bigger not forgetting his Balor/Minotaur form. Gonna have a new more sinister/occult version of him that he was meant to be but I forget it when I originally got art for him.

I don't know when I am going to start making more music or my reinvented version of him, but I will try my best this year. My best is all I can try at this point right? I hope so.

From my last post where I had a breakdown but I am aware no one noticed lol, I am just gonna say yes I am working on some stuff now if I can continue to keep myself towards it.
And no I have not been well in fact I might not even have a place to live in the next year if this gets worse, I have improved heavily with my mixing and mastering to the point where a good amount of critic friends of mine demand I release this stuff.

But the thing is I am not happy until I have a damn EP to do so, and some other random stuff I made and never released but I am just saying in case someone actually cares and I don't doubt you for not caring so it is all good. What happens will happen and that is just how life is.

I will admit I was under the influence when I wrote that last journal, probably not a good idea and it has been something I have been getting better at my drinking and all.
I just had a day that was more pressure than normal and I had a moment of weakness, let my extreme emotions get the better of me when it was at it's worse with no filter.

I do apologize to anyone who read that, but it is true it has been hard for me to get things finished within the last year or two. It just has been slow but not dead completely, I do have physical limitations and some other problems that effects my concentration. And their are people out there with it worse, so that is why I am reposting this in my right mind to say that I am working on it and bettering my life for anyone who cares or not.

Be well you all <3

It was a actual mod from steam with the badge that is basically a yes he is legit but he was not, Though the way some people responded to me when I told them I got my account under control is not helpful actually they were dicks about it.

Been actually working on a ep once I started getting better at mixing and mastering.
Way too long for a upload but the shit is gonna come at least early next year. A lot of crap is in my way and I am gonna bulldozer the fucks.

I hope you all have a wonderful new year this 2020, and for things to go well for you. ^^

Things come up and it makes it hard to deal with, still looking to get a EP out and then a actually full length CD if that gets some positive feedback when I put it all out there...everywhere.

I Gonna place everything where it needs to be for copyright reasons and the way I found out to put it onto spotify and itunes.

All I can say is I improved this year in mixing and mastering let alone experience in making music, though I have much more to learn I am still happy that I stuck with what I have been doing even though I have not too much to show for it. I soon will and I hope others can enjoy it, otherwise I have no desire to make music lol.

Been having down times as well as active working on a possible demo album of the kind of work I make now.
Sooner than later it will be coming out since a lot of it is complete already.

I plan on releasing like 4-5 tracks this month and onward.

It has been a while but some songs I really appreciate is something like this.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xpH4pxps8MY

It is neurofunk, and I am really a big fan of this shit. XD

Cold Spots

A dark IDM track with a Atmospheric feel with a smooth kick and snare.
Ever changing Experimental like usual.

150-BPM

Soundcloud link: https://soundcloud.com/kyle-liebau/cold-spots

Bandcamp link: https://kyleliebau.bandcamp.com/track/cold-spots

Soundcloud link: https://soundcloud.com/kyle-liebau/no-more-time

Bandcamp link: https://kyleliebau.bandcamp.com/track/no-more-time

Falling Deep Away

Soundcloud link: https://soundcloud.com/kyle-liebau/.....ling-deep-away

Bandcamp link: https://kyleliebau.bandcamp.com/tra.....ling-deep-away

Soundcloud Link: https://soundcloud.com/kyle-liebau/all-in-veins

Bandcamp link: https://kyleliebau.bandcamp.com/track/all-in-veins

Soundcloud: https://soundcloud.com/kyle-liebau/downside

Bandcamp: https://kyleliebau.bandcamp.com/track/downside

Also here on my FA :http://www.furaffinity.net/view/27675425/

Soundcloud: https://soundcloud.com/kyle-liebau/night-sirens

Bandcamp: https://kyleliebau.bandcamp.com/track/night-sirens

A groan of tedium escapes me,
Startling the fearful.
Is this a test? It has to be,
Otherwise I can't go on.
Draining patience, drain vitality.
This paranoid, paralyzed vampire act's a little old.

But I'm still right here
Giving blood, keeping faith,
And I'm still right here.

But I'm still right here
Giving blood, keeping faith,
And I'm still right here.

Wait it out.
Gonna wait it out.
Be patient (wait it out).

If there were no rewards to reap,
No loving embrace to see me through,
This tedious path I've chosen here,
I certainly would've walked away by now.
Gonna wait it out.

If there were no desire to heal
The damaged and broken met along
This tedious path I've chosen here
I certainly would've walked away by now.

And I still may, I still may be patient, be patient, be patient.

I must keep reminding myself of this.
I must keep reminding myself of this.
I must keep reminding myself of this.
I must keep reminding myself of this.

And if there were no rewards to reap,
No loving embrace to see me through
This tedious path I've chosen here,
I certainly would've walked away by now.
And I still may.
And I still may.
And I still may.

And I am gonna wait it out.
Gonna wait it out.
Gonna wait it out.
Gonna wait it out.

Tool - The Patient

If there were no rewards to reap
No loving embrace to see me through
This tedious path I've chosen here
I certainly would've walked away by now

I'm gonna wait it out

New track by me

here on FA: http://www.furaffinity.net/view/26347119/

Soundcloud: https://soundcloud.com/kyle-liebau/highwire

Bandcamp: https://kyleliebau.bandcamp.com/track/highwire

Gonna upload a new track soon, but this song is just so beautiful I have to share it after remembering it!

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=nJMW7jKCw8I

By Inventions which is a collab between Eluvium and Explosion in the sky

Feed my will to feel this moment urging me to cross the line.
Reaching out to embrace the random.
Reaching out to embrace whatever may come.

I embrace my desire to
I embrace my desire to feel the rhythm, to feel connected
Enough to step aside and weep like a widow
To feel inspired, to fathom the power,
To witness the beauty, to bathe in the fountain,
To swing on the spiral, to swing on the spiral,

To swing on the spiral of our divinity and still be a human.

Soundcloud Link: https://soundcloud.com/kyle-liebau/dread-in-time

Bandcamp Link: https://kyleliebau.bandcamp.com/tra...../dread-in-time

more to come when I am on the path to feeling better

I have not uploaded really anything for the longest time and that being due to me figuring out I had a pretty bad allergy towards gluten, I am finally recovering now but I would like to show some music a friend of mine makes while I am still working on improving my music.


https://soundcloud.com/null-sector/tracks he pretty much makes mostly Synthwave and Cyberpunk but I think his tracks are pretty great, so go ahead and check them out if you would like.

Soundcloud link: https://soundcloud.com/kyle-liebau/.....acing-currents
Bandcamp link: https://kyleliebau.bandcamp.com/tra.....acing-currents
Youtube link: https://youtu.be/UGJ_K9x4kv4

Soundcloud: https://soundcloud.com/kyle-liebau/break-or-intact

Bandcamp: https://kyleliebau.bandcamp.com/tra.....reak-or-intact

Youtube Video: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=JgPF3HNau_g


Also on Twitter: https://twitter.com/Distortchi