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When they ask how life is going
Posted a week agoThirty
Posted a year agoHit one of those milestone birthdays on Saturday. Yay. It's also the Year of the Dragon again, which means Morpho was introduced 12 years ago. Feels really weird, especially considering the last four years or so seemed like they just vanished in the blink of an eye. I don't really feel any different. Had a fun day out celebrating with friends though, so it was great way to ring it in. Hopefully it's a good precedent for things to come.
Another year over, a new one just begun
Posted a year agoThree years since my last journal entry here... jeez. I ditched my Twitter page back in 2020 and nuked it entirely in January of 2021, so I didn't record a ton of goings-on in that time. Here's a brief overview of how things have gone:
2021: We got a cat, a fat orange boy named Wiskey. I took up film photography and enjoyed it a lot. Went to Florida with the family and
wackycamper and had a great time. I started making better money at work and felt pretty good about life in general until about September, when we found out we had to move again after being at that apartment for only a year. Our speculation is, being peak Covid housing crisis here, they wanted to hike the rent way up, but could only legally raise it by a certain percentage, so they just refused to extend our lease instead. They also tried to screw us out of our deposit, but they weren't aware of the other tenant protection laws they were violating, so we got it back in full, and they were very very salty. We moved to a house much farther south of town, pretty much the only thing available in our price range in the time we had to look. As soon as our stuff was moved in, I took some time off to visit my family. My Subaru died around 600 miles into the trip, which is exactly what I needed on a trip to try to destress. I got lucky and found someone to tow it, relatively cheaply, the last 200 something miles to my parents' place, where I left it behind. I drove back in a Cadillac I bought from my Dad, which I didn't really want, but car is car, I guess. We got another cat just after Christmas, a tuxedo boy named Thug, a sweet boy who thinks he's a tough guy and likes to pick fights he has no chance of winning.
2022: Ended January with a case of Covid. Felt like a really bad cold for about two days, then got better of the course of the rest of the week. I bought a project car in April, a 1992 Dodge Stealth R/T. I tried working on that, but the weather was often uncooperative, and we had snowfall until June. Never got it running right, and eventually it stopped running. Life was otherwise fairly uneventful until Summer, when I went in with Wacky and some other friends and bought a local distillery from the owner, who we'd been friends with for years and felt it was time to move onto a new chapter in life. We've been chipping away at all the legal garbage related to opening it ever since. I started to feel increasingly isolated at the new house because of how far away it was from... everything. I lost a lot of my motivation to take photos because there just wasn't much to photograph that I hadn't already done dozens of times before. We also had a nearly nonexistent internet connection because there were simply no services out there, even a cell signal, which didn't help. I sold the Cadillac and bought a Honda Element, which I adore. I took that on a road trip to visit my parents in October, full of anxiety on both the trip down and back up because of the last trip I took, terrified I was going to have car problems again, but it performed without a hitch, and I had a much more relaxing time with my family and was able to enjoy myself. We finally got Starlink in October. A lot more expensive and still not ideal, but much more reliable overall. I ended up getting into VR gaming and bought a Quest 2.
2023: I swear this year flew by faster than any other before. I feel like I didn't get up to a whole lot aside from working. I kinda didn't, really. Over 2023 I posted up all the art I got that I could track down, which was fun to go through and enjoy again. I bought a few nicer film cameras in hopes of getting back into photography, but I never kept up on it. Developing film myself used to be fun, but it became far too tiring of a process, and paying to have someone else do it wasn't very economical, and it all had to be shipped to someone because there were no local options, so I kinda just stopped. In May I got a Valve Index. I spent a lot of time in VR games. By the end of summer, we got pretty close to getting the distillery in operation, and I took up an interest in watches. Not always a cheap hobby, but practical in that I can wear a watch anywhere and it's always useful. In October, my family came up to visit for the first time in five years. We went to Glacier National Park and a few other places in the area and had a great time, and I got some beautiful photos. But not long after that visit, the company I'd been working for ran out of money and shut down. Everyone was laid off at first, but they restructured and brought people back on. I was fortunate enough to be one of them, though not at first. Then just weeks after getting my job back, we got the call that we would, once again, have to move. We had more time this time, and more options, but we moved into a much smaller place, back into an apartment. I had to do a lot of downsizing and got rid of probably half the things I owned just to not feel suffocated. I sold the project car at a heavy loss just to have it gone. We have stable internet again though, and we're right near any store we might need to shop at, so it's not all bad. We ended up moving during the holidays and were officially out of the old house a few days ago. It's going to take me a very long time to shake the feeling of never being secure in where I'm living.
My one desire for 2024 is just... a really nice boring year. I'm tired of life-altering events, and tired of the once-in-a-lifetime things that happen all the time now. I've stopped making plans for the most part because nothing is predictable any more. I'm trying to stay positive and remain thankful for the good things in my life, but the lack of stability is really starting to wear on me.
That's about it. Happy 2024, hopefully.
2021: We got a cat, a fat orange boy named Wiskey. I took up film photography and enjoyed it a lot. Went to Florida with the family and
wackycamper and had a great time. I started making better money at work and felt pretty good about life in general until about September, when we found out we had to move again after being at that apartment for only a year. Our speculation is, being peak Covid housing crisis here, they wanted to hike the rent way up, but could only legally raise it by a certain percentage, so they just refused to extend our lease instead. They also tried to screw us out of our deposit, but they weren't aware of the other tenant protection laws they were violating, so we got it back in full, and they were very very salty. We moved to a house much farther south of town, pretty much the only thing available in our price range in the time we had to look. As soon as our stuff was moved in, I took some time off to visit my family. My Subaru died around 600 miles into the trip, which is exactly what I needed on a trip to try to destress. I got lucky and found someone to tow it, relatively cheaply, the last 200 something miles to my parents' place, where I left it behind. I drove back in a Cadillac I bought from my Dad, which I didn't really want, but car is car, I guess. We got another cat just after Christmas, a tuxedo boy named Thug, a sweet boy who thinks he's a tough guy and likes to pick fights he has no chance of winning. 2022: Ended January with a case of Covid. Felt like a really bad cold for about two days, then got better of the course of the rest of the week. I bought a project car in April, a 1992 Dodge Stealth R/T. I tried working on that, but the weather was often uncooperative, and we had snowfall until June. Never got it running right, and eventually it stopped running. Life was otherwise fairly uneventful until Summer, when I went in with Wacky and some other friends and bought a local distillery from the owner, who we'd been friends with for years and felt it was time to move onto a new chapter in life. We've been chipping away at all the legal garbage related to opening it ever since. I started to feel increasingly isolated at the new house because of how far away it was from... everything. I lost a lot of my motivation to take photos because there just wasn't much to photograph that I hadn't already done dozens of times before. We also had a nearly nonexistent internet connection because there were simply no services out there, even a cell signal, which didn't help. I sold the Cadillac and bought a Honda Element, which I adore. I took that on a road trip to visit my parents in October, full of anxiety on both the trip down and back up because of the last trip I took, terrified I was going to have car problems again, but it performed without a hitch, and I had a much more relaxing time with my family and was able to enjoy myself. We finally got Starlink in October. A lot more expensive and still not ideal, but much more reliable overall. I ended up getting into VR gaming and bought a Quest 2.
2023: I swear this year flew by faster than any other before. I feel like I didn't get up to a whole lot aside from working. I kinda didn't, really. Over 2023 I posted up all the art I got that I could track down, which was fun to go through and enjoy again. I bought a few nicer film cameras in hopes of getting back into photography, but I never kept up on it. Developing film myself used to be fun, but it became far too tiring of a process, and paying to have someone else do it wasn't very economical, and it all had to be shipped to someone because there were no local options, so I kinda just stopped. In May I got a Valve Index. I spent a lot of time in VR games. By the end of summer, we got pretty close to getting the distillery in operation, and I took up an interest in watches. Not always a cheap hobby, but practical in that I can wear a watch anywhere and it's always useful. In October, my family came up to visit for the first time in five years. We went to Glacier National Park and a few other places in the area and had a great time, and I got some beautiful photos. But not long after that visit, the company I'd been working for ran out of money and shut down. Everyone was laid off at first, but they restructured and brought people back on. I was fortunate enough to be one of them, though not at first. Then just weeks after getting my job back, we got the call that we would, once again, have to move. We had more time this time, and more options, but we moved into a much smaller place, back into an apartment. I had to do a lot of downsizing and got rid of probably half the things I owned just to not feel suffocated. I sold the project car at a heavy loss just to have it gone. We have stable internet again though, and we're right near any store we might need to shop at, so it's not all bad. We ended up moving during the holidays and were officially out of the old house a few days ago. It's going to take me a very long time to shake the feeling of never being secure in where I'm living.
My one desire for 2024 is just... a really nice boring year. I'm tired of life-altering events, and tired of the once-in-a-lifetime things that happen all the time now. I've stopped making plans for the most part because nothing is predictable any more. I'm trying to stay positive and remain thankful for the good things in my life, but the lack of stability is really starting to wear on me.
That's about it. Happy 2024, hopefully.
I survived 2020
Posted 4 years agoIt's going on two years since I posted anything here, damn. What has gone on since then?
Was out of work between my last journal and July 2019, when I started work at a local tech company. Been there ever since through some rough patches, moving up from being a lab jockey to getting promoted to electrical design work a few months ago.
Attended BLFC 2019 and spent a few weeks with family in Reno. Bought a cheap Subaru in August but held onto my Crown Victoria. In September that year I spent a week in Hawaii with my family for my dad's 60th birthday. Took lots of nice photos, but they've mostly gone missing. Super bummed about that, hope to find them still. 100% sure I backed them all up, but I don't know where they went.
2020 happened and ruined my plans for... everything, mostly, as it did for many people. Had a Covid scare in August, tested negative and showed no symptoms, but still had to stay home for two weeks. I quit all forms of nicotine shortly after to try to maintain my lung and heart health. I learned how to fly drones and got real serious about Rubik's cube speedsolving. Essentially got booted from our old apartment due to new ownership and moved to a new one in October. Way nicer though, and closer to work, so net positive. We live right behind a brewery now, which is pretty cool. I also sold off my Tesla stock and eliminated all my debts, so I'm a free man once again, which is nice.
No real plans for 2021, to be honest. I'm going in with no expectations. The main thing I really want to do is get my anxiety problems under control, because even though I mentally feel fine most of the time, my body is stuck in permanent fight-or-flight mode. Feels horrible and causes other physical issues. I can fall asleep and stay asleep fine, but I have to take a dose of my anti-anxiety beforehand to keep my heart from pretending I'm running a marathon and making me wake up exhausted.
I have a big art backlog I need to gather up and post. Gonna try to do that today/tomorrow. I haven't been motivated to do much here because I don't interact with the furry community much as a whole any more. I quit using Twitter back in June because it became too toxic, and frankly hadn't been much fun for a long time. (Don't think anyone even noticed, though.) I don't really commission any art as a result, because I'm kinda afraid to approach anyone now.
So that's where I'm at. Happy New Year, hopefully this one's better.
Was out of work between my last journal and July 2019, when I started work at a local tech company. Been there ever since through some rough patches, moving up from being a lab jockey to getting promoted to electrical design work a few months ago.
Attended BLFC 2019 and spent a few weeks with family in Reno. Bought a cheap Subaru in August but held onto my Crown Victoria. In September that year I spent a week in Hawaii with my family for my dad's 60th birthday. Took lots of nice photos, but they've mostly gone missing. Super bummed about that, hope to find them still. 100% sure I backed them all up, but I don't know where they went.
2020 happened and ruined my plans for... everything, mostly, as it did for many people. Had a Covid scare in August, tested negative and showed no symptoms, but still had to stay home for two weeks. I quit all forms of nicotine shortly after to try to maintain my lung and heart health. I learned how to fly drones and got real serious about Rubik's cube speedsolving. Essentially got booted from our old apartment due to new ownership and moved to a new one in October. Way nicer though, and closer to work, so net positive. We live right behind a brewery now, which is pretty cool. I also sold off my Tesla stock and eliminated all my debts, so I'm a free man once again, which is nice.
No real plans for 2021, to be honest. I'm going in with no expectations. The main thing I really want to do is get my anxiety problems under control, because even though I mentally feel fine most of the time, my body is stuck in permanent fight-or-flight mode. Feels horrible and causes other physical issues. I can fall asleep and stay asleep fine, but I have to take a dose of my anti-anxiety beforehand to keep my heart from pretending I'm running a marathon and making me wake up exhausted.
I have a big art backlog I need to gather up and post. Gonna try to do that today/tomorrow. I haven't been motivated to do much here because I don't interact with the furry community much as a whole any more. I quit using Twitter back in June because it became too toxic, and frankly hadn't been much fun for a long time. (Don't think anyone even noticed, though.) I don't really commission any art as a result, because I'm kinda afraid to approach anyone now.
So that's where I'm at. Happy New Year, hopefully this one's better.
WHY
Posted 6 years agoUgh.
So after my last journal, I had a reasonably good holiday season. Got a new laptop and a new carry gun!
Once again though, like all my previous jobs, things have deteriorated to the point that I have no choice but to leave. Why do I have such bad luck with employers? I'm a hard worker and I always try to maintain a good attitude and get things done the right way, but eventually it all breaks down.
I guess I'll use the downtime to tackle some personal goals...
Also, I'm on Telegram pretty much all the time, so if any of y'all wanna hit me up there, send me a PM and I'll give you my deets.
So after my last journal, I had a reasonably good holiday season. Got a new laptop and a new carry gun!
Once again though, like all my previous jobs, things have deteriorated to the point that I have no choice but to leave. Why do I have such bad luck with employers? I'm a hard worker and I always try to maintain a good attitude and get things done the right way, but eventually it all breaks down.
I guess I'll use the downtime to tackle some personal goals...
Also, I'm on Telegram pretty much all the time, so if any of y'all wanna hit me up there, send me a PM and I'll give you my deets.
AAAAAAAH
Posted 7 years agoDang, I've been in Montana for 11 months now. I've been pretty quiet on here because I've been either busy or depressed and just kinda fell out of the habit of checking in here.
WackyCamper and I moved into a new place in March. A little more expensive, but much nicer. It took me until April to finally land a job up here, so I had to get by on savings and credit cards. Pretty rough after my car's transmission died a few months before moving up here and I had to drop over $2000 getting it rebuilt. The job is good, though, it's a decent gig working at a gun warehouse. Get to handle a lot of really awesome stuff. Unfortunately, it was about the same time that my problems with depression and anxiety flared up to its worst in years, and I felt like trash basically the entire summer. Thankfully I've been able to get it back under control thanks to a wonderful doctor here and some new medication. I feel better than I have in... years, honestly. I have energy again, I can do things, and my anxiety is nearly nonexistent... most of the time.
I also got much more into photography after getting myself a Nikon D5500 from a pawn shop in town. It's become a passion as much as music has been, and something that I still managed to find some happiness in even during my major depressive period earlier in the year. My gun warehouse job also gives me an opportunity to practice photography doing product shots.
I've also been hard at work with a few friends at starting up our own company, which hopefully will be taking off soon. Exciting times ahead!
WackyCamper and I moved into a new place in March. A little more expensive, but much nicer. It took me until April to finally land a job up here, so I had to get by on savings and credit cards. Pretty rough after my car's transmission died a few months before moving up here and I had to drop over $2000 getting it rebuilt. The job is good, though, it's a decent gig working at a gun warehouse. Get to handle a lot of really awesome stuff. Unfortunately, it was about the same time that my problems with depression and anxiety flared up to its worst in years, and I felt like trash basically the entire summer. Thankfully I've been able to get it back under control thanks to a wonderful doctor here and some new medication. I feel better than I have in... years, honestly. I have energy again, I can do things, and my anxiety is nearly nonexistent... most of the time.I also got much more into photography after getting myself a Nikon D5500 from a pawn shop in town. It's become a passion as much as music has been, and something that I still managed to find some happiness in even during my major depressive period earlier in the year. My gun warehouse job also gives me an opportunity to practice photography doing product shots.
I've also been hard at work with a few friends at starting up our own company, which hopefully will be taking off soon. Exciting times ahead!
Officially a Montana fur!
Posted 8 years agoSaturday I packed up my car and drove 14 hours from Reno to Missoula. I spent a good chunk of the summer here with wackycamper and had an absolute blast, thanks in no small part to the outstanding fur community here. The night I arrived a bunch of them were there to greet me, and last night even more of them had a get-together at a local pub to welcome me ;.=.; I've never had anyone go out of their way for me like that before, and it really cemented to me just how special these guys are <3
I'm looking forward to spending time with them and making a future for myself here!
wackycamper and had an absolute blast, thanks in no small part to the outstanding fur community here. The night I arrived a bunch of them were there to greet me, and last night even more of them had a get-together at a local pub to welcome me ;.=.; I've never had anyone go out of their way for me like that before, and it really cemented to me just how special these guys are <3I'm looking forward to spending time with them and making a future for myself here!
Great, now what?
Posted 8 years agoSince my last journal things at work have deteriorated to the point of being unsalvageable.
After speaking to HR about my desire to move departments, I've been written up (for things I didn't do) and barred from doing EMT work. Manager refused to answer my emails, even with HR copied on them. Tried to communicate these issues and prove I'm being singled out and harassed. Then in my next meeting with HR, they told me they saw nothing retaliatory about these actions, and I was accused, right after, of timecard fraud. For three discrepancies, going back to December, that can be attributed to technical issues. So I said "fuck this place" and put in my two weeks' notice on Thursday.
So I'm about to be jobless, but it's better than taking abuse from my manager. But I certainly didn't anticipate having to completely jump ship, and had/have no plans in place for future employment. So... fuck.
On the upside, I got a Switch not long after my last journal. So I got that going for me, which is nice.
After speaking to HR about my desire to move departments, I've been written up (for things I didn't do) and barred from doing EMT work. Manager refused to answer my emails, even with HR copied on them. Tried to communicate these issues and prove I'm being singled out and harassed. Then in my next meeting with HR, they told me they saw nothing retaliatory about these actions, and I was accused, right after, of timecard fraud. For three discrepancies, going back to December, that can be attributed to technical issues. So I said "fuck this place" and put in my two weeks' notice on Thursday.
So I'm about to be jobless, but it's better than taking abuse from my manager. But I certainly didn't anticipate having to completely jump ship, and had/have no plans in place for future employment. So... fuck.
On the upside, I got a Switch not long after my last journal. So I got that going for me, which is nice.
Leaving
Posted 8 years agoI'm officially ditching the Security department at work as soon as I'm able.
On Friday we had an emergency situation, and our manager's handling of it endangered our lives. Sent an email to HR that night asking for info on switching departments, because I no longer feel my safety or well-being is a top concern.
Put in an application to go into Maintenance and will be talking to the HR girl on Monday.
On Friday we had an emergency situation, and our manager's handling of it endangered our lives. Sent an email to HR that night asking for info on switching departments, because I no longer feel my safety or well-being is a top concern.
Put in an application to go into Maintenance and will be talking to the HR girl on Monday.
Sometimes things change.
Posted 8 years agoSo it's been a minute since the last journal.
MFF was a lot of fun. Hung out with a lot of cool peeps. Travel plans got fucked up at the end though, due to weather, so I ended up staying in Chi-town an extra night. A strange place to wander alone with your thoughts...
December was kind of a stressful month. Christmas was good though.
New Year's Eve I got myself a new TV. 40" 4K Samsung Smart TV. Makes everything look gorgeous.
January: FC! Hot damn that was a fun time. Hung out with the best con squad yet and spent the majority of the con lit as fuck. I had an absolute blast!
One day at Scheels, when I headed in to buy new self-defense rounds for my 1911, I found a Springfield Armory 1911 in the used guns... for $400. Bought it. One can never have too many 1911s. >.=.> About a week later, I spotted a FN Hi-Power at a gun show for $525. Brand-new. Grabbed it. My first 9mm, and holy God, it's become my favorite handgun to shoot, and my new carry piece.
Last weekend I traded in my PS4 and got myself a PS4 Pro. Worth it. Gaming in 4K is outstanding.
On Friday, my grandpa, now 87 years old, gave me an early birthday gift: the target pistol he bought brand-new in high school. When he was on the school's shooting team, back in 1946, he bought a Hi-Standard H-D Military, and he's had it ever since. It's now mine. It's such a beautiful gun -- I'm working to get it back to full operating condition, which won't take much except for some new screws. I'm gonna hold onto this thing forever.
At the beginning of February, the Security department finally got a new manager. After being without one for over four months (our old manager resigned out of nowhere the day I left for my Montana trip, and I didn't find out until I got back to Reno), everyone was relieved. Trouble is, he's horrible. He hasn't bothered to get to know anyone -- he doesn't know our names, nor does he know that I work for HIM and not as contract security -- or the way we work together, or what each of us has contributed. The fuckstick has seen fit to gut everything we've worked on the last year, created new policies that don't make sense, and is generally making everyone miserable with his Trump executive order-style of doing shit. Despite how large this facility is supposed to be, he thinks we have too many people on our team, and I now fear for my job security. I never even worried about that in the months we didn't even have a manager.
My stress level is high and I've become addicted to cigarettes... unhealthy, yes, but they calm my anxiety effectively. I'm just keeping my fingers crossed that the new boss either gets fired or I can come up with a suitable backup plan before any cuts are made.
All I can do is try.
MFF was a lot of fun. Hung out with a lot of cool peeps. Travel plans got fucked up at the end though, due to weather, so I ended up staying in Chi-town an extra night. A strange place to wander alone with your thoughts...
December was kind of a stressful month. Christmas was good though.
New Year's Eve I got myself a new TV. 40" 4K Samsung Smart TV. Makes everything look gorgeous.
January: FC! Hot damn that was a fun time. Hung out with the best con squad yet and spent the majority of the con lit as fuck. I had an absolute blast!
One day at Scheels, when I headed in to buy new self-defense rounds for my 1911, I found a Springfield Armory 1911 in the used guns... for $400. Bought it. One can never have too many 1911s. >.=.> About a week later, I spotted a FN Hi-Power at a gun show for $525. Brand-new. Grabbed it. My first 9mm, and holy God, it's become my favorite handgun to shoot, and my new carry piece.
Last weekend I traded in my PS4 and got myself a PS4 Pro. Worth it. Gaming in 4K is outstanding.
On Friday, my grandpa, now 87 years old, gave me an early birthday gift: the target pistol he bought brand-new in high school. When he was on the school's shooting team, back in 1946, he bought a Hi-Standard H-D Military, and he's had it ever since. It's now mine. It's such a beautiful gun -- I'm working to get it back to full operating condition, which won't take much except for some new screws. I'm gonna hold onto this thing forever.
At the beginning of February, the Security department finally got a new manager. After being without one for over four months (our old manager resigned out of nowhere the day I left for my Montana trip, and I didn't find out until I got back to Reno), everyone was relieved. Trouble is, he's horrible. He hasn't bothered to get to know anyone -- he doesn't know our names, nor does he know that I work for HIM and not as contract security -- or the way we work together, or what each of us has contributed. The fuckstick has seen fit to gut everything we've worked on the last year, created new policies that don't make sense, and is generally making everyone miserable with his Trump executive order-style of doing shit. Despite how large this facility is supposed to be, he thinks we have too many people on our team, and I now fear for my job security. I never even worried about that in the months we didn't even have a manager.
My stress level is high and I've become addicted to cigarettes... unhealthy, yes, but they calm my anxiety effectively. I'm just keeping my fingers crossed that the new boss either gets fired or I can come up with a suitable backup plan before any cuts are made.
All I can do is try.
COMRADE, IT HAS BEEN TOO LONG
Posted 9 years agoLast journal was in June? Fffff.
Well, wasn't up to much in July except wrestling with an electronics project. After putting too much money and effort into it, and three units, I finally emerged victorious and have a flawlessly functioning Pioneer VP-1000 LaserDisc player. The second-ever consumer LaserDisc player! Because I'm a nerd and I love old tech.
August I bought a new guitar! Ibanez Sage acoustic-electric. It's definitely reignited my interest in playing. It sounds so beautiful~
September: I got a mothafuckin' raise! An extra $2.50/hr base rate plus another $3k in company stock. Hot damn!
October, I spent two weeks staying with wackycamper at his place in Montana! Gorgeous place. Had lots of fun, shot lots of guns, and drank lots of beer. 'MERICA! I'd love to go back and hope to do so soon :3
I also got my first real gun: a 1911! Works wonderfully. Keep it by my side because we live in crazy times.
This month, I built an AR-15 and bought a fuckton of ammo in anticipation of the Presidential election. Had things gone the other way, people would be panic-buying everything and the prices would go way up, so I wanted to beat the rush. That said, guns are a super fun hobby, so I'm really glad I got into them! So that, and I made travel plans for...
MFF!
Yep, imma be at MFF! Looking forward to seeing internet friends again and meeting others for the first time. Hit me up if you're gonna be there and wanna hang!
I have literally traveled more in this year alone than I ever have before in my life. It's wonderful!
Well, wasn't up to much in July except wrestling with an electronics project. After putting too much money and effort into it, and three units, I finally emerged victorious and have a flawlessly functioning Pioneer VP-1000 LaserDisc player. The second-ever consumer LaserDisc player! Because I'm a nerd and I love old tech.
August I bought a new guitar! Ibanez Sage acoustic-electric. It's definitely reignited my interest in playing. It sounds so beautiful~
September: I got a mothafuckin' raise! An extra $2.50/hr base rate plus another $3k in company stock. Hot damn!
October, I spent two weeks staying with
wackycamper at his place in Montana! Gorgeous place. Had lots of fun, shot lots of guns, and drank lots of beer. 'MERICA! I'd love to go back and hope to do so soon :3I also got my first real gun: a 1911! Works wonderfully. Keep it by my side because we live in crazy times.
This month, I built an AR-15 and bought a fuckton of ammo in anticipation of the Presidential election. Had things gone the other way, people would be panic-buying everything and the prices would go way up, so I wanted to beat the rush. That said, guns are a super fun hobby, so I'm really glad I got into them! So that, and I made travel plans for...
MFF!
Yep, imma be at MFF! Looking forward to seeing internet friends again and meeting others for the first time. Hit me up if you're gonna be there and wanna hang!
I have literally traveled more in this year alone than I ever have before in my life. It's wonderful!
Still alive, kinda.
Posted 9 years agoHave you ever gotten writer's block just trying to post a journal? That's what's happening to me now.
I don't even know what I want to say other than I'm still around. I just haven't touched FA much for a while. Haven't wanted to. I even have new art, but I honestly felt like shit for a long time after BLFC this year, which I kept mostly to myself, so in addition to leaving a few Telegram groups, I lost any motivation I had to bother with FA. I have a Furry Network page, but I haven't done anything with it for the same reason. The only site I'm actually active on is Twitter.
In all honesty, I've been feeling pretty lonely lately. Makes total sense for me to withdraw and limit my avenues of communication in such a case, right? But I'm finding that in general, the more people I try to connect with online, the more frustrated I get that I can't see them in person. I hate having so many friends I can't hang out with, and I think that makes me feel more isolated than just not talking to anyone. Then I think of the people I might be neglecting and feel like a bad person for doing so. THEN I think of how many people could just as easily reach out to me, but don't, and... I feel worthless, because obviously I'm not worth their time to do so. I guess I'm just not that interesting. But then... how many of them might be experiencing what I am? It's easiest to just withdraw and distract myself with things like work and pointless hobbies.
I don't know why I feel compelled to spill my guts on FA instead of talking to someone. Maybe it's because it's easier to just offload this *somewhere* and not have to worry about burdening anyone specific with it.
Welp, back to the shadows I go...
I don't even know what I want to say other than I'm still around. I just haven't touched FA much for a while. Haven't wanted to. I even have new art, but I honestly felt like shit for a long time after BLFC this year, which I kept mostly to myself, so in addition to leaving a few Telegram groups, I lost any motivation I had to bother with FA. I have a Furry Network page, but I haven't done anything with it for the same reason. The only site I'm actually active on is Twitter.
In all honesty, I've been feeling pretty lonely lately. Makes total sense for me to withdraw and limit my avenues of communication in such a case, right? But I'm finding that in general, the more people I try to connect with online, the more frustrated I get that I can't see them in person. I hate having so many friends I can't hang out with, and I think that makes me feel more isolated than just not talking to anyone. Then I think of the people I might be neglecting and feel like a bad person for doing so. THEN I think of how many people could just as easily reach out to me, but don't, and... I feel worthless, because obviously I'm not worth their time to do so. I guess I'm just not that interesting. But then... how many of them might be experiencing what I am? It's easiest to just withdraw and distract myself with things like work and pointless hobbies.
I don't know why I feel compelled to spill my guts on FA instead of talking to someone. Maybe it's because it's easier to just offload this *somewhere* and not have to worry about burdening anyone specific with it.
Welp, back to the shadows I go...
BLFC 2016
Posted 9 years agoBLFC has outdone itself again, as it has every year. Best con theme, best dedication to a theme, best swag, and an awesome venue. Had an awesome time hanging out with wackycamper and company, as well as other friends, invested $20 in blackjack and won $326 overall, bought some awesome Hyena Agenda gear, and got an adorable new badge. Ran into one of my coworkers o.=.o 
squeedgemonster remembered me from my drunken state at FC and hugged me :3
Downside was this was definitely the most difficult time I've ever had hanging out with anyone at a con. Except for the above dude and a handful of others, coordination was nearly impossible. Spent most of Saturday night in the casino. Sunday night I got roped into babysitting an angry drunk dude I'd never met before and got ditched. Took drunk dude's room key to his friend in another room -- ended up being a room party no one bothered to tell me about. I felt like garbage, so I fucked off and played blackjack until 4:00 AM. I was basically over trying to socialize Monday morning, so I cashed out my chips, checked out of the hotel, and left the con without talking to almost anyone except my roommates.
Overall experience: 6/10.
wackycamper and company, as well as other friends, invested $20 in blackjack and won $326 overall, bought some awesome Hyena Agenda gear, and got an adorable new badge. Ran into one of my coworkers o.=.o 
squeedgemonster remembered me from my drunken state at FC and hugged me :3Downside was this was definitely the most difficult time I've ever had hanging out with anyone at a con. Except for the above dude and a handful of others, coordination was nearly impossible. Spent most of Saturday night in the casino. Sunday night I got roped into babysitting an angry drunk dude I'd never met before and got ditched. Took drunk dude's room key to his friend in another room -- ended up being a room party no one bothered to tell me about. I felt like garbage, so I fucked off and played blackjack until 4:00 AM. I was basically over trying to socialize Monday morning, so I cashed out my chips, checked out of the hotel, and left the con without talking to almost anyone except my roommates.
Overall experience: 6/10.
BLFC IS HERE AGAIN
Posted 9 years agoI AM HYPED UP FOR THIS SHIT, SO HAVE ONE OF THESE Q&A THINGS
Where are you staying?
GSR!
What day are you getting there?
Wednesday to hang with my roomies~
How are you traveling?
EL CARRO LOCO
Who will you rooming with?
:3
What is the best way to find you?
Twitter, yo! MorphotheDragon
Are there any panels you might be attend?
No idea yet XD
Will you be suiting?
Don't own one sooooo probably not :v
Do you do free art?
Not much of an artist, but maybe? XD
Do you do trades?
Won't say never!
Do you do badges?
I make ID badges at work, but that's probably not what you're looking for.
Will you be selling?
Nope
What is your gender?
Male
How old are you?
22
How tall are you?
Like 6' or so
What do you look like?
Mmm... glasses, medium build, tattoos on my forearms, two white claw piercings in my left ear. I'll also be rockin' badges so that's probably an easier way to check!
Relationship status?
Single
Can I talk to you?
Yus! Please do :3
Can I visit your room?
Depends on how the roomies feel!
Can I buy you drinks?
Yeah, sure :p
Can I hug you?
Yes~
Will you be going to parties?
Most likely!
If I see you, how should I get your attention?
By name works fine!
Can I come with you for food/fun/etc?
Yus! I wanna hang out with folks as much as I can ^.=.^
Can I look in your sketchbook?
Yeah, if I bring it
Can I draw in your sketchbook?
Sure!
Can I take your picture?
If you want!
What's your goal(s) for the con this year?
Hang out with as many friends as possible! Also not get totally plastered like I did at FC.
Where are you staying?
GSR!
What day are you getting there?
Wednesday to hang with my roomies~
How are you traveling?
EL CARRO LOCO
Who will you rooming with?
:3What is the best way to find you?
Twitter, yo! MorphotheDragon
Are there any panels you might be attend?
No idea yet XD
Will you be suiting?
Don't own one sooooo probably not :v
Do you do free art?
Not much of an artist, but maybe? XD
Do you do trades?
Won't say never!
Do you do badges?
I make ID badges at work, but that's probably not what you're looking for.
Will you be selling?
Nope
What is your gender?
Male
How old are you?
22
How tall are you?
Like 6' or so
What do you look like?
Mmm... glasses, medium build, tattoos on my forearms, two white claw piercings in my left ear. I'll also be rockin' badges so that's probably an easier way to check!
Relationship status?
Single
Can I talk to you?
Yus! Please do :3
Can I visit your room?
Depends on how the roomies feel!
Can I buy you drinks?
Yeah, sure :p
Can I hug you?
Yes~
Will you be going to parties?
Most likely!
If I see you, how should I get your attention?
By name works fine!
Can I come with you for food/fun/etc?
Yus! I wanna hang out with folks as much as I can ^.=.^
Can I look in your sketchbook?
Yeah, if I bring it
Can I draw in your sketchbook?
Sure!
Can I take your picture?
If you want!
What's your goal(s) for the con this year?
Hang out with as many friends as possible! Also not get totally plastered like I did at FC.
Under the needle again
Posted 9 years agoGot me a new tattoo about two weeks ago. Biohazard symbol on my chest. Hurt like a bitch.
I also bought a new bass and got a new phone.
I also bought a new bass and got a new phone.
22
Posted 9 years agoTurned 22 on Wednesday. Got a cool little .22lr semi-auto pistol from my parents and my sister gave me a bunch of Fallout-themed stuff. Bought myself a Sega Master System. yay
I saw Starfucker again on Valentine's Day. Kickass show and I got to hug the frontman <3
Also, been working at my new job for a certain electric car company almost a month now. I'm enjoying it. Unlike my past jobs, I feel like I actually belong there. Having job stability is nice too.
I saw Starfucker again on Valentine's Day. Kickass show and I got to hug the frontman <3
Also, been working at my new job for a certain electric car company almost a month now. I'm enjoying it. Unlike my past jobs, I feel like I actually belong there. Having job stability is nice too.
FC 2016 recap + new job!
Posted 9 years agoSooooo, I almost ended up not going to FC at all this year. x.=.x Didn't have a place to stay for a while, and my plans for getting there kinda... vanished from under me. However, some super sweet friends offered to let me stay with them, and while I was planning on driving myself down, Pretzelz offered to take me and my passenger with him <3
Thursday: After driving down with Pretzelz, Riley, and another local named Shane, I found out our room hadn't been booked for that night. Uhhhh. Ended up staying with Shane and his roommates for the night, so it worked out. Met up with my roomies, grabbed some Subway. Got a phone call out of nowhere -- I got a job interview set up with Tesla! o.=.o
Friday: Woke up and got breakfast with Pretzelz, and ran into a friend I haven't talked to in ages while waiting in line! Met up with another friend I met on Twitter ages ago. Met
mallikeet! :D Tracked down Kingaroo, hung out with him and his roommates, went to dinner. Got ridiculously good pizza at a bar nearby. Visited the party floor!
Saturday: Got breakfast with Holo and Zain! Visited the Dealer's Den and met Pepper Coyote and Fox Amoore! Talked to them both a bit, bought CDs from both. They signed them too! Ate part of a gigantic burrito and hit up the party floor again. Saw Pepper and Fox perform that night -- hilarious! Awesome show.
Sunday: Got a donut and chilled with Zain for a while, then got pizza with Kingaroo and his crew. Met
foxosexual! :D Hung out with him for a while and picked up some badges I commissioned! Got an early start on drinking and totally overdid it. I ended up WICKED SICK YO. Shoutout to the guys who looked after me during that difficult period in which I felt my life was about to end and I had no control over like, anything. At least I had the foresight to not puke on my badges. Before I reached that point I felt confident enough to tell squeedgemonster how much I love her art; later on I ended up giving her a hug despite being plastered. Rehydrated a bit and grabbed my guitar, headed to the convention center still tipsy, told Pepper Coyote he was "a good guy" and that "I like you." Jammed out with Kingaroo and BS'd with other fine folks until 5:30 AM. Trudged back to the room, bought a Dr Pepper on the way so I could drink something that wouldn't make me sick, went to sleep.
Monday: Got two hours of sleep after getting back to the room, but no hangover -- got the feeling like shit part out of the way earlier, I guess. Vodka can fuck directly off. Drunk me looked out for sober me and bought food during the evening, which I ate part of. Packed up all my shit, stuck it in the car, got food with Pretzelz and Shane. Packed up the car and got a few more hugs in. Ran into Squeedge again in the Marriott lobby and got to give her another hug :3 Chilled with Lane for a while and then drove back to Reno.
Yesterday I went to my job interview at Tesla's new Gigafactory. Guess I rocked it because I got offered the job (security officer) that night. This means another trip to California in a few weeks!
Today has been a recovery day before I fly up to Washington on Saturday to visit a few friends~ You know who you are :3
Thursday: After driving down with Pretzelz, Riley, and another local named Shane, I found out our room hadn't been booked for that night. Uhhhh. Ended up staying with Shane and his roommates for the night, so it worked out. Met up with my roomies, grabbed some Subway. Got a phone call out of nowhere -- I got a job interview set up with Tesla! o.=.o
Friday: Woke up and got breakfast with Pretzelz, and ran into a friend I haven't talked to in ages while waiting in line! Met up with another friend I met on Twitter ages ago. Met
mallikeet! :D Tracked down Kingaroo, hung out with him and his roommates, went to dinner. Got ridiculously good pizza at a bar nearby. Visited the party floor!Saturday: Got breakfast with Holo and Zain! Visited the Dealer's Den and met Pepper Coyote and Fox Amoore! Talked to them both a bit, bought CDs from both. They signed them too! Ate part of a gigantic burrito and hit up the party floor again. Saw Pepper and Fox perform that night -- hilarious! Awesome show.
Sunday: Got a donut and chilled with Zain for a while, then got pizza with Kingaroo and his crew. Met
foxosexual! :D Hung out with him for a while and picked up some badges I commissioned! Got an early start on drinking and totally overdid it. I ended up WICKED SICK YO. Shoutout to the guys who looked after me during that difficult period in which I felt my life was about to end and I had no control over like, anything. At least I had the foresight to not puke on my badges. Before I reached that point I felt confident enough to tell squeedgemonster how much I love her art; later on I ended up giving her a hug despite being plastered. Rehydrated a bit and grabbed my guitar, headed to the convention center still tipsy, told Pepper Coyote he was "a good guy" and that "I like you." Jammed out with Kingaroo and BS'd with other fine folks until 5:30 AM. Trudged back to the room, bought a Dr Pepper on the way so I could drink something that wouldn't make me sick, went to sleep.Monday: Got two hours of sleep after getting back to the room, but no hangover -- got the feeling like shit part out of the way earlier, I guess. Vodka can fuck directly off. Drunk me looked out for sober me and bought food during the evening, which I ate part of. Packed up all my shit, stuck it in the car, got food with Pretzelz and Shane. Packed up the car and got a few more hugs in. Ran into Squeedge again in the Marriott lobby and got to give her another hug :3 Chilled with Lane for a while and then drove back to Reno.
Yesterday I went to my job interview at Tesla's new Gigafactory. Guess I rocked it because I got offered the job (security officer) that night. This means another trip to California in a few weeks!
Today has been a recovery day before I fly up to Washington on Saturday to visit a few friends~ You know who you are :3
FC THING
Posted 9 years agoMy first non-BLFC furcon! I have no idea what to expect but I think it'll be fun~
Hotel: NO IDEA. Friends have offered to let me sleep on their floor so wherever they are <3
Arrival/Departure: Thursday/Monday!
Means of transportation: Driving down with Pretzelz and Riley!
Who do you hang out with? ERRYBODY. Though I'll definitely be bugging Prezelz,
kingaroo, 
holodrom, and 
belledraco :3
Gender: Male
Relationship Status: 404
How old are you? 21
How tall are you? Around 6'
Are you an Artist? AREN'T WE ALL IN A WAY? For real though, I draw very rarely. I also play guitar.
Do you have an artist table? NEIN
Do you take commissions? Look, if you offer me enough money, I'll do whatever kind of project you want.
Do you do trades? I won't say never.
Are you a Fursuiter? Nooooo :c I was hoping to have one by now! ;.=.;
Attending parties? Most likely. No idea what's available yet though.
Do you drink? Sure. Not too heavily.
Can I buy you a drink? Sure :D
Can I bring you food? OH YES PLEASE. <3
Do you smoke? I'll enjoy a cancer stick now and then.
Are you attending any panels? Don't knooooow, I'll have to see!
Stage or public performance? Plan on checking out PepperCoyote's performance! Other than that, not sure :p
How do I identify myself to you? Just say "Yo,Adrian Morpho, it's me, Rocky [your name here]!"
Rules of engagement (physical contact)? I don't mind being touched. Just don't be a creeper
How can I find you? Hit me up on Twitter or Telegram! I'm very active on both. Physically I'm a 6' guy with glasses and white spiral piercings in the left ear. I also have two tattoos: a dragon on my right forearm and a radioactivity symbol on my left. I'll also be sporting this badge among others.
Can I talk to you? Absolutely :3
Can I give you lots of money? If doing so would make you happy, go for it XD
Can I give you stuff? See above.
Can I hug or snuggle with you? Hugs, yes :3 Snuggling depends on how comfortable I am with you~
Can I come to dinner with you? Sure, but I'm working on a tight budget so I probably can't pay for you.
Can I hang out with you? Of course :3
Can I take your picture? Why would you want to? :v I guess so.
How do I know if you're not looking to socialize (angry, busy or upset)? In such an event, I'll probably withdraw somewhere quiet outside the con space. Approach gently.
Personality type? Quiet and introverted but I can speak for hours on things I love. Introverted doesn't mean antisocial, though! I love hanging out with people <3
What's your goal for the con this year? Make new friends and let loose for a few days~
Hotel: NO IDEA. Friends have offered to let me sleep on their floor so wherever they are <3
Arrival/Departure: Thursday/Monday!
Means of transportation: Driving down with Pretzelz and Riley!
Who do you hang out with? ERRYBODY. Though I'll definitely be bugging Prezelz,
kingaroo, 
holodrom, and 
belledraco :3Gender: Male
Relationship Status: 404
How old are you? 21
How tall are you? Around 6'
Are you an Artist? AREN'T WE ALL IN A WAY? For real though, I draw very rarely. I also play guitar.
Do you have an artist table? NEIN
Do you take commissions? Look, if you offer me enough money, I'll do whatever kind of project you want.
Do you do trades? I won't say never.
Are you a Fursuiter? Nooooo :c I was hoping to have one by now! ;.=.;
Attending parties? Most likely. No idea what's available yet though.
Do you drink? Sure. Not too heavily.
Can I buy you a drink? Sure :D
Can I bring you food? OH YES PLEASE. <3
Do you smoke? I'll enjoy a cancer stick now and then.
Are you attending any panels? Don't knooooow, I'll have to see!
Stage or public performance? Plan on checking out PepperCoyote's performance! Other than that, not sure :p
How do I identify myself to you? Just say "Yo,
Rules of engagement (physical contact)? I don't mind being touched. Just don't be a creeper
How can I find you? Hit me up on Twitter or Telegram! I'm very active on both. Physically I'm a 6' guy with glasses and white spiral piercings in the left ear. I also have two tattoos: a dragon on my right forearm and a radioactivity symbol on my left. I'll also be sporting this badge among others.
Can I talk to you? Absolutely :3
Can I give you lots of money? If doing so would make you happy, go for it XD
Can I give you stuff? See above.
Can I hug or snuggle with you? Hugs, yes :3 Snuggling depends on how comfortable I am with you~
Can I come to dinner with you? Sure, but I'm working on a tight budget so I probably can't pay for you.
Can I hang out with you? Of course :3
Can I take your picture? Why would you want to? :v I guess so.
How do I know if you're not looking to socialize (angry, busy or upset)? In such an event, I'll probably withdraw somewhere quiet outside the con space. Approach gently.
Personality type? Quiet and introverted but I can speak for hours on things I love. Introverted doesn't mean antisocial, though! I love hanging out with people <3
What's your goal for the con this year? Make new friends and let loose for a few days~
Fuck 2015.
Posted 9 years agoUgh. 2015 was the worst year ever.
Started out promising enough, like they all do. I thought I might actually get a shot at working on an ambulance this year. Nope. Still never moved up and still never given a reason for it. I tried getting into the fire department, but didn't make the cut. I feel okay about that because I at least know why, and it's something I can fix. I have no idea what I could have been working on on the EMT side this whole time, because I never got to test myself. My EMT cert will expire soon and since I've gotten zero real experience since I've gotten it, I'm probably just gonna give up on it. Not really worth renewing at this point.
I quit Sears in May. BLFC was awesome. I started working at the county jail after that. Thought it would be actual EMT work, but the closest I got was sticking needles in people for blood draws. Horrible place to be medical staff, too. Understaffed, overworked. Pressured to do a rush job on our work, and work through breaks. Possible OSHA violations. Not really a safe or healthy environment. The pressure and stress got so bad I came close to having a mental breakdown. After that, in October, I got diagnosed with depression and anxiety on top of my OCD. I quit a month later.
I got a new car in September. It's about the only good thing that came out of that job, and about the best thing to happen for me in general in years. I paid it off earlier this month, so it's fully mine now. I took it on a trip to California not long after I got it and saw Foo Fighters play live. I also built up a nice LaserDisc collection and bought a PS4. But because I quit the jail when I did, I didn't really have much money for the holidays. I had a nice Christmas, but I couldn't buy any decent gifts for anyone I care about, and I feel awful.
New Year's Eve I went to a party hosted by some of the local furs and the fucking local newscasters botched the countdown and completely missed it. I hope to God that's not some kind of omen. 2014 kinda sucked. 2015 said "oh, you thought that was bad? HAHA, FUCK YOU."
Now FC is coming up. I'm still really hoping to go and I even preregistered for it, but honestly, I still have no solid plans in place, and nowhere to stay while I'm there. The only way I'm guaranteed to go currently is to drive myself and then camp out in my car, so that's what I'm gonna do. I'm so tired of never leaving home. Work was basically the only thing that consistently got me out.
After January, I really can't think of anything to look forward to in 2016. I'm so full of anxiety now and my self-confidence is basically gone. If I can get a job that doesn't make me hate myself I'll consider it a successful year.
And because I do it every year...
Favorite albums:
Radiohead - "OK Computer"
Nine Inch Nails - "The Fragile"
Slipknot - "Vol. 3: The Subliminal Verses"
Coldplay - "A Rush of Blood to the Head"
Audioslave - "Audioslave"
Songs:
Moby - "Porcelain"
Audioslave - "Shadow on the Sun"
Mazzy Star - "Look on Down from the Bridge"
Nine Inch Nails - "Dead Souls" (Technically a Joy Division song but whatever)
Muse - "Starlight"
Com Truise - "She Melts"
Coldplay - "God Put A Smile Upon Your Face"
Foo Fighters - "Learn to Fly"
STRFKR - "Slow Dance"
Soundgarden - "Black Hole Sun"
Started out promising enough, like they all do. I thought I might actually get a shot at working on an ambulance this year. Nope. Still never moved up and still never given a reason for it. I tried getting into the fire department, but didn't make the cut. I feel okay about that because I at least know why, and it's something I can fix. I have no idea what I could have been working on on the EMT side this whole time, because I never got to test myself. My EMT cert will expire soon and since I've gotten zero real experience since I've gotten it, I'm probably just gonna give up on it. Not really worth renewing at this point.
I quit Sears in May. BLFC was awesome. I started working at the county jail after that. Thought it would be actual EMT work, but the closest I got was sticking needles in people for blood draws. Horrible place to be medical staff, too. Understaffed, overworked. Pressured to do a rush job on our work, and work through breaks. Possible OSHA violations. Not really a safe or healthy environment. The pressure and stress got so bad I came close to having a mental breakdown. After that, in October, I got diagnosed with depression and anxiety on top of my OCD. I quit a month later.
I got a new car in September. It's about the only good thing that came out of that job, and about the best thing to happen for me in general in years. I paid it off earlier this month, so it's fully mine now. I took it on a trip to California not long after I got it and saw Foo Fighters play live. I also built up a nice LaserDisc collection and bought a PS4. But because I quit the jail when I did, I didn't really have much money for the holidays. I had a nice Christmas, but I couldn't buy any decent gifts for anyone I care about, and I feel awful.
New Year's Eve I went to a party hosted by some of the local furs and the fucking local newscasters botched the countdown and completely missed it. I hope to God that's not some kind of omen. 2014 kinda sucked. 2015 said "oh, you thought that was bad? HAHA, FUCK YOU."
Now FC is coming up. I'm still really hoping to go and I even preregistered for it, but honestly, I still have no solid plans in place, and nowhere to stay while I'm there. The only way I'm guaranteed to go currently is to drive myself and then camp out in my car, so that's what I'm gonna do. I'm so tired of never leaving home. Work was basically the only thing that consistently got me out.
After January, I really can't think of anything to look forward to in 2016. I'm so full of anxiety now and my self-confidence is basically gone. If I can get a job that doesn't make me hate myself I'll consider it a successful year.
And because I do it every year...
Favorite albums:
Radiohead - "OK Computer"
Nine Inch Nails - "The Fragile"
Slipknot - "Vol. 3: The Subliminal Verses"
Coldplay - "A Rush of Blood to the Head"
Audioslave - "Audioslave"
Songs:
Moby - "Porcelain"
Audioslave - "Shadow on the Sun"
Mazzy Star - "Look on Down from the Bridge"
Nine Inch Nails - "Dead Souls" (Technically a Joy Division song but whatever)
Muse - "Starlight"
Com Truise - "She Melts"
Coldplay - "God Put A Smile Upon Your Face"
Foo Fighters - "Learn to Fly"
STRFKR - "Slow Dance"
Soundgarden - "Black Hole Sun"
Looks like I'm going to FC.
Posted 10 years agoI quit my job.
Posted 10 years agono subject
Posted 10 years agoAbout a week after I got my Crown Vic I drove it to San Jose to see Foo Fighters with my sister and her boyfriend. Kickass show. Stayed in a cool little cabin in Santa Cruz. Stopped in San Francisco and bought some cool stuff at Amoeba Music. Car is amazing.
Got a spot for the physical fitness test for the Reno Fire Department. Didn't pass, but I'm okay with that. I did better than I thought I would and I have an idea of what to work on. Plus the guy who went after me on the "run up five flights of stairs with full turnout gear and carrying a 50 lb hose pack" test threw up, and I didn't. So I got that going for me.
I've been feeling really shitty and miserable in general for a very long time -- at least a year, maybe more. It's been a lot worse the past few months, though. I stopped playing guitar. Stopped working out. I gained weight. Wasn't having fun with my video games any more. I officially got diagnosed with depression and anxiety on top of my OCD last week. Got new meds prescribed. We'll see if they help.
Work still hasn't fixed most of its problems. Getting really tired of it. Gonna look for a new place to work. It's stressing me out way too much even if the paycheck is decent. To be honest, I'm probably gonna look for a different career path in general. Nothing has gone right with EMS. My certification is going to expire in a few months and I still have almost zero relevant experience despite my efforts. Kinda don't see a point in trying any more since I'd probably have to relearn so much anyway...
Got a spot for the physical fitness test for the Reno Fire Department. Didn't pass, but I'm okay with that. I did better than I thought I would and I have an idea of what to work on. Plus the guy who went after me on the "run up five flights of stairs with full turnout gear and carrying a 50 lb hose pack" test threw up, and I didn't. So I got that going for me.
I've been feeling really shitty and miserable in general for a very long time -- at least a year, maybe more. It's been a lot worse the past few months, though. I stopped playing guitar. Stopped working out. I gained weight. Wasn't having fun with my video games any more. I officially got diagnosed with depression and anxiety on top of my OCD last week. Got new meds prescribed. We'll see if they help.
Work still hasn't fixed most of its problems. Getting really tired of it. Gonna look for a new place to work. It's stressing me out way too much even if the paycheck is decent. To be honest, I'm probably gonna look for a different career path in general. Nothing has gone right with EMS. My certification is going to expire in a few months and I still have almost zero relevant experience despite my efforts. Kinda don't see a point in trying any more since I'd probably have to relearn so much anyway...
New ride! Plus other stuff.
Posted 10 years agoA few of you know I've been having a bit of trouble on a personal level lately. However, something very nice has happened for me, so I'm feeling a bit better:
Two days days ago I worked out a deal with a Craigslist seller and bought myself a 2006 Ford Crown Victoria Police Interceptor. It used to belong to the Nevada Highway Patrol. It's got 129k miles on it, but it runs absolutely perfectly and has very little notable wear except for a few scrapes and dings that probably happened on the job. It has character, dammit! The interior is almost flawless except for where police hardware like the back seat cage or laptop mount were installed. It still has the spotlights and push bar, however! Literally the only thing I'd change is the stock stereo, which only plays tapes.
Photos! http://imgur.com/a/disoR#0
I also applied for a real credit card yesterday and got approved instantly, so I've got that going for me too.
Last night I put in a job application with the Reno Fire Department, as well. Not sure how much of a shot I've got, but we'll see.
Two days days ago I worked out a deal with a Craigslist seller and bought myself a 2006 Ford Crown Victoria Police Interceptor. It used to belong to the Nevada Highway Patrol. It's got 129k miles on it, but it runs absolutely perfectly and has very little notable wear except for a few scrapes and dings that probably happened on the job. It has character, dammit! The interior is almost flawless except for where police hardware like the back seat cage or laptop mount were installed. It still has the spotlights and push bar, however! Literally the only thing I'd change is the stock stereo, which only plays tapes.
Photos! http://imgur.com/a/disoR#0
I also applied for a real credit card yesterday and got approved instantly, so I've got that going for me too.
Last night I put in a job application with the Reno Fire Department, as well. Not sure how much of a shot I've got, but we'll see.
I bought a PS4.
Posted 10 years agoWork has been kicking my ass so I haven't had much time for it, but... yeah. Hit me up if you want my ID. I have Project CARS, Far Cry 4, Battlefield 4, and Destiny.
WOW I AM LAZY
Posted 10 years agoI haven't done jack on FA since BLFC. Sorry. I have some photos and a piece of art to post, though! And I'm super glad I was able to get them copied to my computer -- my camera died about a week and a half after BLFC after eight years of service ;.=.; I'm on the hunt for another one now that I have a better job.
Also, I've been out of Sears for a few weeks and I could not be happier to not be returning to that lovely little slice of hell. Work at the jail has since commenced and so far has been going fairly well. Adapting to working in a jail environment has been the most tricky part -- the work itself is something I'm more than capable of handling. Not really the job I was hoping to have by now, but... it's definitely a step up.
Also, it's still raining off and on. I think someone at BLFC got drunk and accidentally did a rain dance or some shit during the rave.
Also, I've been out of Sears for a few weeks and I could not be happier to not be returning to that lovely little slice of hell. Work at the jail has since commenced and so far has been going fairly well. Adapting to working in a jail environment has been the most tricky part -- the work itself is something I'm more than capable of handling. Not really the job I was hoping to have by now, but... it's definitely a step up.
Also, it's still raining off and on. I think someone at BLFC got drunk and accidentally did a rain dance or some shit during the rave.
