Well, shit. Its finally over. That one job hanging over my head, taunting me, taking away my free time and money, keeping me from putting time into my art- is FINALLY over. Over the next couple days/ weeks, I'm going to be clearing my unfinished commissions, and starting to get back to a regular schedule again. So much to illustrate! I'm taking this weekend to clean up a bit, and just enjoy not being under this tremendous pressure anymore. So tired…

Well, we're in the process of packing up our shit, preparing for what is now a pretty much inevitable eviction notice. Sis has come down from up North to help get things done, and occasionally, things get- misplaced. So imagine my surprise when I came home from work this evening, to find a nice, big, 3 pound specimen of fucking Tobernite sitting on my desk.

For those not in the know, Tobernite is a Uranium ore, and this particular specimen is, well, more than a little "hot". I found it removed from its safe little display cabinet, from behind glass, and placed carefully upon my desk, little green crystals gleaming menacingly. This stuff isn't dangerous- as long as you don't… I don't know… set it in the middle of my work area!!! My counter is GONE, so I wont be sweeping my room for radioactive crumbs anytime soon. I'll just throw away all the papers and stuff on my desk, I guess. The half life of Uranium is around 4 billion years, so its safe to say if there are any loose bits, I'll be able to find them later…

Well, I've finally gone ahead and set up my system again- I usually listen in here while facing away from it in here- there isn't enough room to set everything up the way I want it, but its- well- better than the computer speakers by a LONG shot. My day job has its advantages- one of which is the ability to BUILD any of our components that I want for myself. Right now, the system playing Midnight Oil behind me has about- lets see- $40,000 worth of equipment in it. One amplifier, one preamp, turntable, and my little Totem Forests. The Apogee Divas are offline until I rebuild them one day, and they cost about $30K if you want a new pair. Right now, my fursuit is hanging from them.

Gotta buy some more soundtracks on vinyl. The Land Before Time sounds great right now, even though there is a little bump in the record at the beginning. I have to be careful: The cartridge I'm using is an Ortofon Cadenza Bronze- its a "medium price" cartridge- it only costs $2,000!!! But man, it sure does sound good. I have it on loan currently, I have to take care not to break it. Ugh… It just completely lost its shit in a bad spot on the record. Someone played this on a bad machine in its past, and now its fucked. Oh well. Back to the Ebay to try and find an unopened copy. :(

The title says it all!

Oh. My. God.

About a week or so ago, I woke up with a little twinge in my neck. Over the next few days, it has progressed into this… I can barely lift my arms to type this. The doctor friends think anything from ruptured disc in my neck or a degenerative disease called Spondylitis (?) Apparently thats where my immune system gleefullly goes about attacking my connective tissues, slowly turning them into bone. I've had a stiff neck before- but this is one of those times that makes you wonder if things are going to get any better.

More than likely its the usual: One muscle gets pissed off, and wreaks havoc on the others around it. Wouldn't be the first time.

Needless to say, this has slowed my art activities down, as the one thing I REALLY can't do is sit at my workstation for hours on end.

I passed a kidney stone a few weeks ago… This is about 10 times worse. I blacked out for a moment when I casually reached for my toothbrush last night. I slept while standing in the corner, because I'm unable to lay down right now, because laying down for any length of time intensifies the effects of whatever-this-is.

Eventually the pain moves out of my neck, and down into my arms and hands, across my chest and into my lower back. It feels like tennis elbow, but it spreads everywhere. My regular doctor wont give me anything for it- calls it "chronic pain", and says I need to "stop doing that". Thanks a lot, asshole. Good luck collecting that $85.

And to think it all started with a little too much stretch one morning… My neck sucks.

I'm away from the studio for a few days, so I probably wont get anything up until next weekend. I'm in Las Vegas for the CES, and though I have my small tablet and laptop, I don't know when I'll get a chance to finish the rough I brought with me- maybe tonight. Its already been a long fucking week, and its just Monday… :(

But I've missed drawing the last couple days, so I'll probably put something up tonight.

I wish I could crank these out faster, but I'm afraid as long as I make everything in color, its going to take a little while to push these through. There is a LOT of story to tell here, and I know everyone is getting impatient (after 3 days!) for Ober and Matilda to make up. As much as I love drawing happy otters/ kangaroos/ etc., know that there will be some times in the story when bad things happen! Just like in real life, my characters sometimes have deep flaws. Matilda is a young mother- and one who has recently lost her little 3 year old joey. She has- issues. Despite her cute little smile, just like anyone who's hurting, she can be really mean when the moment takes her. As our hero has just found out.

There is a lot more to tell with these two. I can't tell the whole story inside the confines of happy interaction, and sometimes the catalyst for character development is an event that upsets the relationship between two characters. As far as upsets go, this is a minor one. But it was necessary. I needed Matilda to "owe" Ober something. Now, he gets to become more than an otter who is going through all of Matilda's left over diapers. If you think THIS part is sad, I hope you can hold on for the next part of the story! That one starts where this one ends, and there is no easy way to get through it… There are going to be some really gutwrenching moments coming up. The story of Matilda's joey is not a happy or pleasant one! But its a great one, I think. I can't wait to draw it. I wont spoil it, its just going to be too awesome. Just hang in there and we'll get there… One ass beating at a time.

Well, with this last posting, its back to business for Ober and Matilda. I'm going to pick it up right where I last left it- with Ober in Mattie's pouch, and the games are afoot. We are just about finished with the apartment- its time for the evening to end, and another adventure to get underway…

For a long time, I was pretty happy. I didn't take a lot of time to make friends, and I never had a lot of time to hang out, anyways. Truth be told, I hated most of the insipid bastards I met in school, and the thought of having to spend any of my free time with others like that made me physically ill. I wasn't pretty enough, or possessed of the level of vapid self worship that creates "popularity" in the amounts necessary to attract social butterflies.

But it didn't matter, because I had a select few friends, whom I spent the entirety of my free time with. We weren't necessarily interested in the same things, but we enjoyed each other's company, as I've been told is the common way of things out there in the cold world. I have people I know, people whom I call friends today, but so far, none at the level that myself and that small group (we're talking like 3, here) enjoyed for about 21 years.

I had a best friend for 21 years. Then, one day, he was simply gone. There were a few small gulfs that emerged during our "time", but they were relatively short lived. I was there when he was married, his best man. I was there when his father died. I rushed to his house to take the gun from him when he called me and told me he was thinking of "ending it all" one night. Whenever the phone would ring, and he was on it, I would immediately give him my attention. No matter what.

Very long story short, one day he just decided he didn't want to talk anymore. From the best I can ascertain, his feeling is that since making friends is easy for him, that they are a relatively disposable resource, and he didn't see any continuing benefit to "keeping" me. So, no explanation, no goodbye, just doesn't answer the phone anymore when he sees my number come up, and that's that.

When my father died last year, he reached a palsied hand of friendship to me, and told me that he "wanted to start over". That lasted about 2 months, during which I was able to get ahold of him on the phone exactly twice. I helped his (separated) wife secure their divorce during that time, making sure I got him into the office to get the papers signed and filed. We went out to lunch once as a group, with his new girlfriend, who made quite the impression on me with her apparently vindictive and judgmental ways. Frankly, she gave me the impression she's a bitch. Sorry… Super Bitch.

After that, he answered one of the 26 calls I made over a period of 4 months- he never returned any messages. Then, I finally gave up on calling. He once made the excuse that he was "super busy- all the time", but apparently that doesn't keep him from ferrying another of our friends around, who also now suddenly no longer talks to me.

My problem is, I can't seem to let those "salad days" fade away. I want desperately to revive something that ought not be revived. I keep telling myself that the person I knew and loved like a brother is gone, replaced by some grim doppleganger, a shade. The man I called "brother" is gone, because he could only exist where he was being supported by his parents, and their business. He didn't know anything else, and when his dad died, and his mum and her new hubby destroyed the business with one bad decision after another, it killed him. So my best friend is gone. All that is left is a memory, because the face he showed me every day was apparently just the well crafted mask of a USER.

Which brings me to the Now: What am I doing wrong? I just can't seem to hold anyone's interest as a friend, and it bothers me terribly. I know that I pretty much come off like Jack Bauer when people meet me, but is that so bad? He's a nice guy… He and I just have… unique skills. I'll admit I'm a little intense on the outside, but I'm actually really soft on the inside, and now, it turns out I've become a Brony, too. I wonder if Kieffer watches MLP… Hmm. I should ask him. We could hang out, and trade Winter Wrap Up remixes.

The best part about the pony t shirts is watching people react to a (glistening, bear-like, as my boss recently referred to me) man wearing a Twilight Sparkle shirt. I look like a smaller Butterbean, just not quite that heavy. But I AM huggable- promise!

Sigh… So lonely.

Well… things have been kind of… bad, lately. Between my housing concerns, and the lack of a satisfactory digital front end, my art output had been pretty much non-existent. Much apologies to my current commissioners, who will, rest assured, be receiving a little something extra from me in light of their patience.

Having sold my beloved Ducati, I managed to divert enough funds from the sale to pay for a shiny new Wacom tablet to replace the one that I had been using before. The small one works, but its the equivalent of working in a straightjacket for me, as I am used to using my whole arm while drawing… My hands cramp up after a few minutes of drawing on the little tablet. So I ordered the (horrifically expensive!) Large Intuos. This weekend is pretty much pooched, but I will be posting some finished commissions this week, following that, I can get back to my strip, as long as I don;t get dragged through any more broken glass on the way…

I look forward to the day I'm living in my own house again, and not one that belongs to the bank. Right now, the homelessness countdown marches on. I have no idea when the sword of Damocles will fall. But right now, its looking rather… well, bad. Will I be able to hew my new home from the wilderness in time? Only time will tell.

Well, I've been to my first con now. It was a lot of fun, I just wish I could have been there more- I only had 1 full day and 2 evenings at this one. Thanks to all who threw me a wave, or who stopped to give a hug to this awkward otter in the wallaby suit. It was pretty good as a start, next year I'm planning on going to a room party or two, and I'll be a lot better prepared, I hope.

Tailbiter made the whole thing possible, by helping me make my suit, otherwise there wouldn't have been a reason in my mind to go. I have some adjustments to make, and a bit more work to finish the full suit, so I can bounce around a bit more. I was a bit self conscious because of some of the issues that we had to temporarily patch around to get Willem out there. Lots of fun, though.

I can't wait till' next year!

Man, have I ever been busy the last few weeks. Catching up after being sick so long sucks. I've FINALLY managed to crawl out from under my work backlog from my day job, and have started woking on finishing a last few commissions up. I will be at Megaplex this year- my first furry con, but I don't know whether or not I'm going to get a room at this point. I will likely be driving there and back one day.

I'm going to see about setting up and doing some colored sketches maybe? I don't know. Hopefully, after today, I'll have some more news on my attire for the show. Working hard to get him finished, I can't wait to see all the parts together. Who will I be? Well, Its a secret for now, but pics soon!

Well, here we are. I'm pretty much over my whatever it was, and am returning to work. I still cough once in a while, but that will probably go on for a while. I think I'm just going to get a little painting done, go out and get something to eat, and then curl up with my Wacom for a while tonight. I'm going to be starting over next week on my comic, the story is finally done. Its going to be a wild ride, and I hope everyone likes it. Its definitely not all cute stuff, and while one of the characters I'm going to introduce is actually a real person, I will hasten to point out that this particular chapter is a work of fiction!!!

I can't wait to get going on this again. Matilda and Ober will be returning Monday!

Well, just starting to get back on my feet again, now. Worked on my boat a bit more on Sunday, just applying the UV protectant now- Epoxy doesn't withstand sunlight well at all, so you have to cover it up with varnish or paint. Otherwise, whatever it is you have made will turn to sticky brown crap after a few weeks in the sun. Even then, its not a good idea to leave these things outside, which seems like an anachronism for a boat, I know… But just ask anyone who has made the mistake of putting that pour on gloss finish on an outdoor table- Epoxy turns to shit outside. Even in the shade.

Spent the afternoon after that working on commissions until my eyes began giving me trouble, then I went down and began tearing into the innards of a 150KW UPS system for a local TV station. I couldn't get the transformers out, which kind of pisses me off- they weighed about 800 pounds a piece, and much of that was copper. My friend and I fished all the other valuable parts out we wanted, and left the rest of the carcass and the unfortunately heavy parts to the other junk collectors. I hated to see that thing be taken apart like that, but the service life was pretty well exhausted, and the replacement was already in service when I was called in.

The inside of the data hub was… Significant. It was easy to see why the UPS was replaced. If it went down, something on the order of half a million homes would be without internet, TV, or phone until it was brought back online. Its frightening how much we all depend upon what is ultimately incredibly delicate and complex technology. Especially the fiber optic stuff. One good solar event, and we can kiss all that shit goodbye.

Scary to see how complex it was. Scary to see just how many pieces of equipment go down on a fairly regular basis, even without the urgings of our sun. The halls were literally littered with broken, or brand new, but quickly obsolete equipment. There were piles of high end TV monitors- broadcast grade stuff that I used to lust after when I was into home theater, lying out in the rain. They were pretty much fucked when I got there. But they aren't wide screen, so out they go… There were also broadcast D2 recorders, and optical disc recorders, Betamax broadcast VCRs, really high end video gear- all working, all out in the rain. The image quality from these pieces blows HDTV away, and there they were- in the scrap pile.

Farnsworth is undoubtedly rolling in his grave. NTSC was a work of genius. Digital is pretty much a fraud, designed to do one thing and one thing only: Carve up the RF spectrum into smaller bits, so the powers that be could make more money. I'm tired of watching HDTV. The quality is absolute SHIT. Downloaded music also sounds like crap compared to the original recording, and music servers seem to ruin everything put into them. You can't even find a halfway decent CD player anymore…

Oh, well. Time to go listen to some vinyl, and draw some more.

I'm pretty sure now… This is a plague of some sort. Its been more than 2 weeks now.

Wow. Its been an interesting couple of days. While I REALLY don't enjoy being sick, the number of truly freaky dreams almost makes up for it. Kind of like a freak recharge, my normalcy levels are at a historic low today. Every time this happens, I truly relish the fragility of mankind's hold on "reality" as a whole. Its been YEARS since I've seen some of the things I've dreamt the last few days.

I used to, with some regularity, find myself occupying some fanciful new body, exploring verdant forests, or apocalyptic shores. I've spent no small amount of my unconscious lifetime ensconced in these forms, living alternate lives- like 'Inception', but with fur. Since I've spent most of my time at work during my sickness, this means I've literally been stepping between these vivid fantasy worlds and my actual, hard reality… Falling asleep at my workstation, with my eyes pretty much wide open, I looked across the table at my cohort to find he had been replaced by a rather ornately armored weasel fellow… "Um… You've got really nice armour…" said I, before I could stop the words from escaping my lips.

"What?" of course, was his response, and I came to once again. "Oh, shit. Never mind." Must be nice to have your supervisor lose his grip right before your eyes. 'Course, usually I'm pretty sleep deprived, and when you throw in a nice 102 degree fever… Its a recipe for interesting conversations, that's for sure. Well, he knows I'm not crazy, anyways… Doesn't he?

Yeah, so… I really don't know what the Hell this is that I've been blessed with by one of my inconsiderate minions at the Factory. Now, pretty much EVERYONE I have any kind of contact with has whatever-this-is… Even my friggen' CATS are falling ill with it now. Ever been in a house with 20 (!) sick cats? Yeah, so, I pretty much told my favorite disease vector that if he ever gets me sick like this again, I'm going to bury him up to his neck and hang bacon from his ears- next to the gator pit.

That said, if the volumes of colorful liquids and semi solids escaping uncontrollably from my infected body are any indication, I'm going to be right as rain um… soonish. God, I would KILL to be able to cough right now. But hey, I've lost about 10 pounds, and the coughing and retching should really make for some awesome abs!

AS soon as I clear a few more commissions, I will be going back to my series. I went back and read through, and it definitely needs to be fixed. I think it kind of lost its way right about the time Ober found Matilda by the TV set. I'm going to pick it up there, and remove all the illustrations that followed that scene. Not a whole lot, mind, but enough to get the pace back on track. It just went off on a tangent right after that.

I had a really nice progression going up to that point, and Ober's diversion into thinking with his dick kind of ruined the story, in my opinion. So, we're going back to a more innocent storyline, the one I had originally envisioned, but somehow didn't get to write at the time. Trust me, it'll be a lot better. But if you want to save any of those pages, I suggest you do so NOW, because they are going to be removed pretty soon! I don't know if I'll put them in scraps or not- I'd like to just forget where this thing went…

Rest assured, though, there WILL be plenty of "joey baths" in Ober's future with Matilda! :P The comedic material is simply too abundant to ignore…

I was just wondering if there is anyone nearby… The few "normal" (if you can call ANYONE that) friends I have (or had) really aren't into furry stuff. Just looking for a few like minded friends to hang out with, meet for beers, etc. It kind of sucks not having many friends. Being a fur REALLY narrows the field…

I must say: The second installment of KFP is incredible. Dreamworks is what Disney USED to be in the animation world. I didn't see any overt political messages, I didn't find any little societal jabs to mentally dodge… All I saw was incredible storytelling, achingly beautiful animation, and characters you wish you could crawl into the screen with and snuggle. Po's character is still the lovable oaf we immediately enjoyed and empathized with in the first film, the Five and Master Shifu still suffer a bit with Po, but you can see how much they respect him now despite that. The story is breathtakingly well crafted, and the premise is SOLID.

I wont give up any spoilers. I wont say a thing about the plot. Just go see it. I saw it in regular 2D, because I typically find 3D annoying, but I'm going back. I HAVE to see how it looks in the new darling format. If anything, just to go back there. For the first time in more than 20 years, I am actually going to go BACK to a movie to see it again. I NEED to…

God, I want to work with these people.

Well, after shitloads of money, and no small amount of trepidation, my Epson 4800 is up and running. The missing cartridge doesn't appear to have caused any cock ups with the ink delivery tubes, so I guess I'm in business. The first thing I printed was a very detailed and colorful illustration by Marymouse of a mama 'roo and her adorable joey out for a hike in the forest. The first go printed well, but there was some subtle banding, so I ran a printhead check- I saw numerous clogged nozzles in the test pattern, but much to my amazement, the printer paused printing and scanned the resulting blocks, automatically identified the bad nozzles, and performed the self cleaning on the individual elements! It did this act several times, and after it was satisfied with its own output, it printed a short report on the printer's history: This thing has only ever had ONE new set of cartridges installed in its ENTIRE LIFE!!! The linear feet of paper passed through is only 750 feet! This thing is essentially brand new!

So, after I find a reasonably smooth watercolor paper to pound through this thing, I'm going to start switching over to watercolored illustrations for pretty much all my work.

Thanks once again for all who ordered commissions from me to help me get this thing off the ground- and for those who are waiting patiently, rest assured the work is well on its way!

Now, all I need to do is get my broken Epson 10000 scanner working! :p

Well, its been a busy last couple of months, but I think I can get back on my regular schedule again. The family has headed back out of town, and though I have a lot of job related stuff to do, its the kind that leaves me sitting around between paint coats at home, so plenty of time to get on the arting computer. For those of you who are waiting for commissions (thanks!) they will be coming out this week, and I'm hoping to get the rest of the Ober Rivers current storyline up as well. The commissions take precedent over the strip though, so we'll see how much time I have for them. New stuff coming soon!

Man, the last couple weeks have been pretty epic. I just want to assure everyone who has commissioned work from me that the work is ongoing, and I will be posting stuff soon. Still trying to get the printer up and running… The refillable cartridges have arrived- now all that remains is to get the ink to fill them! Spent this last weekend out of town, taking my 3 day vacation. I hope next time I'm able to get more time off- 3 days isn't enough. Maybe later this summer… Want to pan for Gold in Georgia next… Heard its lots of fun.

I am tired of seeing people die. No, I'm not talking about the real world- we really don't have much control over that. I'm talking about the squawking, flashing box that we find ourselves sitting down in front of most every night. We are on antenna TV in my house- we can't afford cable anymore, and besides, $150 a month to pluck the few withered raisins of halfway decent shows from the steaming pile of shit that passes for programming… Well, I've better things to pay for.

It seems the only network we can receive is ABC, which, it seems, CONSTANTLY has someone kicking the bucket on every show in their weeknight lineup. Why the Hell is there so much depressing CRAP on ABC?!!! How many people do we have to see get buried on Grey's Anatomy before the writers have managed to illustrate every conceivable way of dying in a fucking hospital? I've had enough of watching my OWN family lying in bed, dying, thank you very much. I was going to get a flat screen for the new house, but I don't even think I'll bother.

I'd follow the dictum of simply looking elsewhere for my tubey entertainment, but when every other station of the 15 I used to receive has simply faded from view over the past 2 months, the options are pretty limited: ABC or public broadcasting.

I can't even get FOX, which pisses me off to no end. It used to be the strongest one, but now, it only pops on for a few seconds, and then disappears. I HATE this bullshit all or nothing HDTV. I would GLADLY "put up" with a snowy picture to be able to HEAR whats going on! But, as usual, new and improved just means shiny and plastic. Analog WAS, and IS, a THOUSAND times better than Digital. Always was, always will be. The genius minds that came up with NTSC broadcast must be turning over in their graves seeing the state of broadcast television today.

Had he invented a window to the future of his device, Farnsworth would have probably focused his attention on his fusion experiments instead.

Bah.

I'm still taking commissions, as I haven't yet picked up enough to pay for that printer food. So, if you are curious about what I might be able to do with your characters, I do 1-2 character illustrations for $25- which gets you pretty much my regular style, though I'm open to produce pretty much anything. Just send me your idea, and we can discuss.

So far we have the following commissions in process:

1.  xavie

2.  saltiestpeanut

3.  idlevalley

4.  brogatar

Xavie actually started BEFORE the call for commissions, so there were 11 spots.

There is still plenty of room for anyone else wanting an illustration, just note me if you want something!