This is it, we are finally within the last week with less than 7 days left to submit your OCs. Big thanks to everyone who has already participated this year. I'm really looking forward to this years final result.

https://www.furaffinity.net/journal/10725192/
https://www.furaffinity.net/journal/10725192/
https://www.furaffinity.net/journal/10725192/
https://www.furaffinity.net/journal/10725192/

We're officially half way through November, which is insane because it feels like it JUST started. But don't forget to sign up your swinger characters for this years free Christmas orgy if you haven't already. It only cums once a year!

https://www.furaffinity.net/journal/10725192/
https://www.furaffinity.net/journal/10725192/
https://www.furaffinity.net/journal/10725192/

First of all I'd like to say thank you all for the well wishes. It really does mean a lot to me when people take the time to type up some words of encouragement and show genuine care for my well being.

I had a long chat with my roommate and then a long chat with mom. The entire day was comprised of me doing what I do best which was overthinking everything and filling my head with self-doubt. I was then really torn on whether I should stay or go as there's both pros and cons to both living situations. This is also a very bad time for me to move right now as the holidays are right around the corner, and there's a lot of house guest planning at my parents house. So for the time being, I've decide to give my roommates one more chance and hope that they can air out their dirty laundry in a less toxic manner then just doing what my parents would do when I was a teenager, and blow up at each other while I barricade myself in my room. I intend to stay the rest of the year at the very least and then decide on how I'm finally feeling by then.

But seriously... if this shit happens even ONE more time, I am GONE. All projects are back on track for the most part, although I'm still pretty raw.

Not a thing I should be sharing, but my mom had to talk me out of committing suicide after having a nervous breakdown a few days ago. She did a pretty good job of convincing me that life is worth living for some reason, so I calmed down and all was well for a few days. But then over the weekend, surprise surprise... my roommates started fighting again about their marriage problems. I stayed out of it this time as nobody was screaming for help this time around, but this night has been the final nail in the coffin for me. I've been trying to make things work since the cheating incident. I've been putting on my best bullshit smile and pretending everything is okay. I've been drinking and getting high almost every day now just to try to silence the bad thoughts and constant pit in my stomach from being sad 24/7. This is something my boss even took notice of and told me that I need to stop having so many drinks right before my night shifts because it's effecting my work. Kinda hard to resist when you drink for free at the brewery you work at. But yeah, I'm done.

It's funny. Society makes such a big fucking deal about moving out of your parents and being out on your own. Like, as soon as you move out, that's when you stop being a loser and your real life starts. But all I've learned from this is that the people I loved and looked up to as friends are just shitty people who are only in it for their best interests alone. Also I'm still a loser. Maybe if I had someone to actually love, their would be some sort of hope. But because I'm still not willing to trick someone into falling in love with me... I just don't have the physical nor mental capacity to make this work. The only difference between living with my friends and my parents at this point is that my friends are slobs and don't clean up after themselves. So the house is always a mess and my feet absorb dog hair and kitty litter like a damn sponge. I cannot keep living like this.

When I wake up tomorrow (if I even fucking sleep tonight) I'm going full AWOL and just throwing everything into trash bags. I'll figure the rest of my shit out later. I always do. For the time being, I'm back on Emergency Hiatus and all projects are on pause. Which really sucks for me because I wanted to get that damn comic finished in time. Although I only have like 3 people who even acknowledge my existence on this site, so I'm not even sure why I give myself these imaginary deadlines to begin with.

I just want this shit year to be over already....

It's that time of year again ladies and gents! Time for yet another fun fuckfest! Okay, so here's how it works for those that don't know. Every year (almost) I draw a FREE orgy picture for Christmas that can potentially have one of your characters take part in the action. All ya gotta do is provide me a Name, Sexual Orientation, and a Ref sheet. That's it! So your comment should look like this:

Wolf FartFuckerTurd
Bi
http://www.furaffinity.net/view/18869428/

You can submit as many characters as you like, but know that I will only choose ONE if any at all. Just a few hopefully easy to follow rules.

RULE #1:
NO BITCHING!! What do I mean by bitching? I mean don't get pissy if I don't pick your character. Please no, "AHHH, I DIDN'T GET PICKED!" comments either. I can't stand that shit and someone ALWAYS breaks this rule. If anyone breaks this rule, I will BLOCK you!

RULE #2:
No choosing partners. I will match your character up best based on their sexual orientation.

RULE #3:
No winged characters or characters with multiple limbs. Wings are just all around bad for orgies. If you submit a character with wings, that doesn't mean they won't have a chance, it just means I will be drawing them without them if I choose them.


And that's it! You have until December 5th to submit. I will post occasional reminders until then for anyone who might miss the journal because lets be honest... we all just kinda skim through the journals. That, and FA is a god damn ghost town at this point. Where the fuck is everybody? Did you all DIE!?

Here's some previous years examples:

2022: https://www.furaffinity.net/view/50358112/
2021: https://www.furaffinity.net/view/45230707/
2020: https://www.furaffinity.net/view/39843778/
2019: https://www.furaffinity.net/view/34354956/
2017: http://www.furaffinity.net/view/25856019/
2016: http://www.furaffinity.net/view/22094238/
2015: http://www.furaffinity.net/view/18603102/
2014: http://www.furaffinity.net/view/15309925/

Happy painting!

Hard to believe it's only 12 days until Halloween. I can't believe how fast this terrible year has gone by. Like, it was awful for me but at least it's almost over. I kind of don't want to reveal this just in case I don't finish it in time, but I have a big BIG Halloween project that I've been slowly working on for over 4 years now. So fingers crossed that I get it finished in time. Until then, I still have a load of Halloween ideas I wanna draw, but I know I won't have time for, and after Halloween I'll get post-Halloween blues and probably not want to draw them. Like, there's nothing stopping me from drawing Halloween pictures all year long... but if I drew them year round, then I wouldn't get as excited to draw them come next Halloween and then they'll just be another chore in my life. So here's a few ideas I want to at least attempt before then. I won't get to them all, but I'm curious to know what others would want to see.

-Muffet and Rougemorg. I make an effort to draw them every Halloween, Already drew Rougemorg so now I still need to draw Muffet.
-Marceline, specifically her alter ego "The Star" from Fionna and Cake.
-Toriel. Also a staple for Halloween from me for some reason. Probably dressed as a witch again.
-Kim Pine mini comic. This one will be more demanding, but I really want to draw a short comic of Wolf and Kim Pine at a coffee shop then walking around a Fall forest. The usual sexual shenanigans occur. This one is more Fall themed then Halloween, so I guess I could still do this one in November if nothing else.
-Mouse Ashley from Resident Evil 4, aka "Mousley." I didn't strike the Mousley meme while it was hot because I HATE jumping on bandwagons for clout. Now that the iron has cooled and the meme is pretty much dead, this was a thing I actually really liked.
-Little Nightmares. Like, an aged up version of Six raping someone because she's completely evil.
-Splatoween. Splatoon 3 is finally doing it this year and has already revealed Shiver, Frye, and Big Man's Halloween variants. I really wanna draw them.
-Lilith from Darkstalkers. I have yet to even draw her once, I think it's time.
-Halloween Cherrie. I don't think I've drawn poor Cherrie even once this year, so I'm completely ashamed of myself.
-Eliza in a sexy Halloween costume.
-More gore rape. Not sure if it's even a thing anyone else enjoys, but this is the only time of the year I draw it so I'd like to fill the quota.
-More Gothsanne. But I've already drawn like 5 or 6 of them this year already. Maybe goth out some other Disney characters?
-Halloween Yumiko (Wolf's Mom) yet again taking advantage of him.
-Various monsters. Already drew a Silent Hill nurse, but more things in that ballpark of being disturbing but sexy.
-Heather Mason. Speaking of Silent Hill, I'd really like to try drawing her again as she's my favorite character from the series.
-Creepy Susie from the Oblongs. Although I never found the Oblongs art style to be sexually attractive at all, I've seen plenty of other artists draw her very sexy. So something along those lines.
-The Orange Hat Pirate. Character based off a dream I had that I posted a long journal on: https://www.furaffinity.net/journal/10713895/ Again, if I do, I better do it soon because I know my brain will throw this character in the trash. But I'm SO terrible at translating my character ideas to paper. (I'd also like to add that "The Orange Hat Pirate" sounds like a fucking baby's story book character, so I'm kinda embarrassed that was the best my brain could come up with.)

That's all I can think of off the top of my head. I WILL be doing at least a couple from this list. Let me know which ideas you like best!

This journal is about an extremely vivid dream I had last night that I have no idea where the fuck it came from within the catacombs of my brain. I was especially tired last night probably thanks to my blood sugar being through the roof and crashed out at 9pm. For context, I am NOT an early to bed early to rise person. I am a stay up until 1am-3am to be up at 7am to angrily go to work person. But there's some days where I just need to catchup on some rest and this was one of those nights. So here goes.

Also know that I rarely remember my dreams and that they're usually really stupid. I'm usually exploring an abandoned house or being attacked by zombies in my dreams. This particular dream started with  Dragonofdarkness13 and I hanging out as we've done for several decades now. He wanted to show me a movie he had on his laptop called "The Curse of the Orange Hat Pirate." My dream self says, "cool, lets watch it." And the movie begins. Now I'm not sure what it's like for other people who have dreams about watching movies or tv shows because I've only ever been myself. But the way it work in my head is that I'm transported into the film, not as a character, but as the camera or viewing audience. So I had no involvement in this story whatsoever. So at this point I'm trying to guess what this movie is going to be about. Well, it's clearly going to be about pirates. One that clearly wears an orange hat. I suppose orange is a fairly uncommon color for a pirate to wear. So I guess they'll stand out. But no!

As it turns out, this dream was a crossover between Full Metal Alchemist and Sonic the Hedgehog. Brain... are you feeling alright? I haven't thought about FMA in almost a decade now. I never even finished Brotherhood because of how fucking boring it was. The only 2 characters my brain pulled in was Ed and Al though, probably because they were the only 2 characters I could remember the names of. As for the Sonic team. There was sadly no Rouge the Bat or Amy Rose. Just the main 3, Sonic, Tails, and Knuckles. The dream was spotty and of course made no sense so what possible reason Ed and Al would team up with Sonic and his friends was beyond me. Not only that, but they'd probably assume that they were horrible homunculus creatures. Logic aside, both parties were both looking for the lost treasure of the Orange Hat Pirate, a fearsome blood-thirsty pirate that was even more feared than Blackbeard. The treasure was probably haunted by his ghost or something. I assume Ed and Al were trying to find the Sorcerer's Stone or what the fuck ever. But I have no idea why Sonic and friends would want it since Sonic doesn't give a shit about anything except chili dogs. Anyway... after joining forces, the group is immediately attacked by robot pirates. Not ghost pirates, not zombie pirates, not pirate pirates, but ROBOT pirates. Okay. Sonic team takes the out the same way they would in the games whereas Ed and Al do... something. I forget if they did anything really. I assume at some point Ed clapped his hands with lightning and then pulled some shit out of the ground. Then yammered on for 25 minutes explaining to the audience that this isn't magic, it's ALCHEMY and it makes perfect sense because it's all about equivalent exchange or some shit. I really didn't like FMA... why is my brain doing this?

After the robot pirates battle, the group follow the trail of dead robots to a deserted Island in the shape of a skull. How original, Brain.... Also not sure how they got there without a boat, but we kinda just cut to this part. And the Island coincidentally looks just like a Sonic platforming stage. So now it's up to Sonic team to make it to the top. I distinctly remember the movie being from Sonic's perspective during this point as if I were just playing the games normally. I also remember a fourth wall breaking joke where Tails falls off a ledge and was screaming for help while drowning. Sonic's pace doesn't let up as Knuckle's shouts, "Shouldn't we go back to help him!?" To which Sonic responds, "Don't worry, Knuckles! Whenever Tails and I get separated, he magically appears right next to me!" To which Tails then blinks into existence right next to him.

When the group finally makes it to the top of the skull mountain, we see a silhouette dawning a big black elaborate pirate hat with a spikey orange trim with an orange skull and crossbones on it. It's very hard to describe this hat btw. It kind of looked like a traditional pirate hat, but it had these long tapestries on the sides and back and it was covered in orange spikes like shark teeth. Also! The fucking hat isn't even ORANGE! It was black with an orange trim! First robots, now you can't even get the color right, Brain!? The silhouette reveals himself to be none other then Dr. Robotnik (or Dr. Eggman if you're a smartass)in a pirate costume. He's also looking for the treasure. He found the hat, so the treasures gotta be nearby. Also, there is no reason for him to be dressed as a pirate either, I guess he just did it because pirates were the theme. Also he was the one who built the robot pirates which does seem like a thing he'd do. But it seems like had he not done that, then the group wouldn't have found him in the first place. For a genius, he really isn't very smart. Robotnik then summons a giant robot like he does at the end of every game. Sonic turns into Super Sonic er some shit. Ed pulls more crap out of the ground. The Robot is destroyed and Robotnik is blasted off Team Rocket style.

The group never finds the treasure and they all come to the conclusion that it's just a legend. They all shake hands and go on their merry ways into the sunset and the movie comes to an end.... OR DOES IT!? The camera then slowly pans down underneath the skull island at the bottom of the sea. There, we see a massive treasure with one sinister looking pirate chest that has been smashed open by one of the cogs of Robotnik's giant robot. The chest glows an eerie orange glow. We then cut to a familiar black and orange hat sinking to the bottom, at which point a dark figure's arm grabs it and places it on top of it's head. The figures back is turned to the camera. So this is the big reveal where we see the ghost of the Orange Hat pirate for the first time thinking it's going to be this big buff zombie dude with an incredible beard. But no! The figure turns around and surprise! It was a busty anime woman wearing an elaborate Kimono type pirate garb with a bandolier full of flintlock pistols. Her eyes glowing bright orange as she says directly to the camera, "MY NAME IS (inset name here... I do not remember the name she spoke. Something long and Japanese) AND I AM THE ORANGE HAT PIRATE! (like... just in case the audience is that fucking stupid) AND NOW THAT I'M FREE, I SHALL RULE THIS PATHETIC WORLD WITH AN IRON FIST!! She then swims away from the camera cackling maniacally as the screen fades to black and the credits role.

The dream then cut back to and I as dream Me says, "That was awesome!" to which he says, "Yeah, that movie came out almost 20 years ago and it never got a sequel. It never even made it to America." (which is weird because it was in English) I remember my dream self being really bummed after that and asking to send Me a screenshot of the Orange Hat Pirate so I could draw her. The dream was then abruptly ended by my alarm going off. This was one of the most insane dreams I've ever head, not only because I remember it... but my brain was somehow able to write an entire movie with a 3 act structure and fucking twist at the end. Yet for some reason it takes me months to draw ONE comic page in real life! Brain! What the fuck is wrong with me! Who do I think I am!?

I really REALLY want to draw the Orange Hat Pirate... but I know if I try that I will fail miserably. This dream awoke emotions in me. Like, the same feelings I get when I watch Balto or the Iron Giant. Like I've seen this movie 1000 times as a kid but watching it as an dult gives me this weird nostalgic feeling that I wanted so much more out of it. If I do attempt it I better do it soon because I know my brain will just cram that shit into the garbage bin along with all of my school knowledge and names of people I just can't remember.

Long Life update. Please skip if you don't care. I also should NOT be talking about this... but I just don't care about protecting him anymore.

So this was supposed to be one of the best weeks of my life. I was looking so forward to it. My friends and I were going to Disneyland on Monday (10/2) and a Coheed and Cambria concert on Saturday (yesterday). I just recovered from the cyst and helping my parents move and it felt like things were finally getting back to normal. But then my roommate decided that it was a GREAT idea to cheat on his wife! The weekend before Disneyland AND 3 concerts! (I was only going to one). On top of that, it was a WEEK after his fucking anniversary! He lied to both of us and made up some shit about going to a "Health Fair." But in reality, he was on a hot date that apparently went very well! His wife was visiting her parents, ya see. So if he just wasn't stupid enough to get caught he probably wouldn't have even felt bad. I've known this guy since I was a little kid and we've been best friends for over 20 years now. He's been with his girl for 17 years. What the fuck!? Was he kidnapped by aliens and replaced with a shitty clone?

The very next morning, his wife came home and woke us both up by screaming bloody murder. Like chills up my spine levels of crying where I felt so horrible and needed to leave. I gave them some space for the entire day. I assumed most of it was them just fighting. The day after that, my morning ritual of coffee drinking was interrupted by a scuffle I heard by the backdoor followed by his wife screaming for help. As I ran to the back, he had her in an armlock, and I screamed, "What the fuck is going on!?" She yells, "You need to call 911!" I take out my phone and say, "What should I do!? I don't know what to do in this situation!" His response was, "YOU CAN STAY OUT OF IT!" Like... bro... you have your fucking wife in an armlock... do you really expect me to just walk away and go back to my room? I fucking LIVE here now! So we start screaming back n forth at each other. He's throwing insults like, "Have you been with a woman for 17 years!?" and "You're just jealous of the attention I get from women." Which is some of the most childish, high school bullshit. So I try to call 911. But for some insane reason... my phone was NOT working and I couldn't get through. In panicked desperation I tried calling my mom and my boss. No luck. In the time it took to do all this, he eventually released her and took off in his truck.

I had a long talk with his wife after that. She was completely destroyed. Her parents came down to comfort her and also to have a... I guess intervention for her husband. When he eventually came home, I gave them some space and started ripping everything off of my walls because I seriously thought I was gonna need to bail. After their long discussion, he talked to me and said that he's very sorry and that he needs help and that he's sick in the head. And yes, he has been going through some bad shit right now.... But was cheating and lying really the fucking solution? He eventually calmed me down and the 3 of us went drinking that same night. Believe it or not, he also talked us into going to Disneyland the next day. This is how he's going to act. Let's just pretend everything is okay and nothing bad happened.

Disneyland:
What a fucking mistake. Last time I was at Disneyland was right before Pandemic. So now not only is Disneyland associated with the world going to shit, but it's also now associated with my best friends shitty marriage falling apart. What a treat for me. The park was packed, so while waiting in line, I shit you not, they were making phone calls to setup couples therapy. You could cut the tension with a fucking knife. We grabbed lunch and while he was in the restroom, she asked me what my favorite ride was so far. I know what she's doing. My response was, "Look, I'm not having fun. I'm so fucking mad at him for what he did to you. He hurt me too. And I seriously want to move out, so I'm gonna start packing tomorrow." She then begs me not to go because she said that she doesn't want the friendship to end and to please give it a month for me to cool down. Also she doesn't know what he's capable of anymore, so she feels like if his only friend bails, then he might kill himself. I say okay. I'll stay at least another month. I promise.

A few days go by and he wants me to grab a drink with him. He tells me that he wants to be more open and honest with me. He tells me all about the date and drops another bombshell on me that he wasn't expecting the date to go as well as it did and that he had ANOTHER GIRL lined up for Sunday. Wow! He goes on to tell me that he's worried because he doesn't feel as bad about it as he thought he would. So I guess there's nothing stopping him from doing it again. After all, it's not illegal to cheat on your wife! So there's no punishment! You really are a piece of shit! I cannot believe what I am hearing! He doesn't want my advice anyway, he just needs to hear himself talk.

Coheed and Cambria: (yesterday)
I really didn't wanna go... but I already paid for my ticket before the incident so I guess I'm screwed. Bought a double pack of extra strength weed gummies. had one before we left and one after dinner. On top of that got a few mixed drinks at the restaurant, and some shots and beer at the concert itself. I was fucking wasted. I'd also like to add that I don't even like Coheed and Cambria... I just wanted to spend more time with my former friends. Everything was going alright until some fuckhead started moshing. We're already packed in like sardines. Why the FUCK are you moshing!? This resulted in being crushed between a tall fatass and some dude with long hair. Would have been nice if I was sandwitched between 2 girls with a big butt and big boobs. But no of course! I get sweaty fat guy and sweaty denim vest. My face is literally in this dudes hair. After 3 minutes I lost my shit and fought through the crowd to get the fuck out. I've had nightmares like this where I'm just trapped in a sea of people. I literally couldn't breathe. Roommate texts me while I'm hiding in the restroom that they got out of the crowd too. But all I can think is how much I just want to run away into oncoming traffic. My anxiety is through the roof, I'm high as fuck, I just want to die! We left early before the crowd got out. Thank fucking christ. They didn't even play "Welcome Home!"

I have the house to myself today which is nice because I really needed some time alone. I also couldn't help but notice that his wife was kissing him like crazy, I assume she's trying to be more affectionate because another reason he said he did what he did is because she's cold and unloving. So yeah, his reward for cheating on his fucking wife is that everything's going to be just fine! No punishment! And now your wife is going to try to be a better lover! Dawwww what a happy ending!

My brain is broken. I wake up every morning now with a deep pain in my head, like someone punched me in the forehead. I also have a deep pit in my stomach all the time now. I thought I knew who he was and that he was better than this. But now I have no idea what this dude is capable of anymore. If he doesn't care about hurting his wife, then where do I even stand!? Am I a pet!? Am I only here for your fucking amusement and when you need something!? Fuck you! I don't know what to do.... This is the first time in my life where I completely have NO idea what to do. He's one of my only friends and now I don't trust him. He seems to think that because I'm not the one in the relationship that it doesn't effect me. But it DOES effect me. I fucking LIVE here! What are the mental gymnastics you're doing right now!? This is my HOME! Did you seriously think I was just gonna sidestep this shit. I'm still just so fucking mad, and upset, and I'm crying every day.

This is my favorite month. I should be working on Halloween projects, but I have had such a hard time just trying to get out of bed in the morning. I keep hoping I'll just not wake up anymore. I use to have this belief that you don't need a lot of friends. You just need some really good solid ones. But now that I've put all of my eggs in one basket for so long, and all my eggs are now broken, I NEED NEW FRIENDS. I NEVER thought I would EVER have to put on a bullshit mask around my true friends. Ya know, that bullshit sugary nice mask that most retail associates have to put on? Yeah, that's me now with him. I fucking hate the way the world works where lying and cheating is the best way to get what you want.

I'm broken.... And I don't know how to fix this.

So this is a journal about nothing, just more to add to the fire I suppose. Last night I was sleeping, as I sometimes do, and my framed commission collage that sits directly above me on my wall while I sleep came crashing down on my head. I guess a combination of gravity and cheap Elmer's school glue caused the poor thing to just give up and completely fall apart. For those of you that don't know what I'm referring to, the best picture I have of it is from my 2019 Room Tour picture in the bottom left hand corner: https://www.furaffinity.net/view/33099712/

Luckily for me, it wasn't made out of real glass, just cheap plastic. Otherwise it might have shattered all over my bed and body. I also wasn't hurt much, although anytime I'm scared awake it takes a very long time for me to get back to it. Especially knowing I need to be up in a couple hours for work. It was the middle of the night/early morning so naturally I didn't want to deal with it. So I put the pieces off to the side to deal with it after work. But when after work came, I realized that there was no reassembling it, as all the piece really were just held together with cheap tape. Probably not even any glue. Guess that's what I get for buying a cheap frame from Wal-Mart. So in a quiet rage I destroyed it....

Umm... I think I may have pissed off a gypsy or a voodoo man or something. How's everything with you?

I need new friends. I've gone too long putting all of my eggs in one basket and now I'm paying the price for it. I need to find REAL friends. Not pretend friends who only care about you when they need something. But actual genuine bonds with other human beings who care about me and in return I can care about them. Where do I start? I NEED advice on this. I need help. I'm 35 years old and I still don't know how to socialize because I have a hard time opening up to people thanks to having crippling anxiety and trust issues.

Furthermore, I'm sick and tired of being alone. So I'm going to start forcing myself into the dating scene. I've been lied to for decades now with people constantly telling me, "It's alright, you just haven't met the right girl yet. Give it time and I'm sure you'll find someone. Give yourself more credit." WRONG! It's all bullshit! If you don't force yourself to engage in love then love will never find you! It's been 35 years. Does anyone know of any dating sites or apps that aren't just a fucking scam? Better yet, is anyone single who lives in southern California/LA County. I live in the Antelope Valley. I'm bisexual, although I lean more towards women. If I were to ever be in a gay relationship, I would need to be a top. If anyone reading this is single or knows someone who is single and looking. Please message me. I'm not even trying to just find casual hookups. I'm looking for actual companions both romantically and non-romantically.

I'm also going to make a better effort to get out of the house more often to blow off some steam. Go see a movie. Get back into working out at the gym. I recently found out about an axe throwing place nearby, so throwing some axes for fun. I cannot keep living like this. I need stability and to stop hurting day after day after day. I know it's too much to ask, but there has to be some other human beings on this planet that aren't just walking traffic cones.

Update: It's been resolved.

I just got caught up on the latest episode and as of right now I love this show. It's been a really long time since I've enjoyed any shows lately because I'm a cynical manchild, so this has been a refreshing change of pace.

I very much enjoyed the original Adventure Time (not only because I really wanted to fuck Marceline) but because I thought it was legitimately a good show. It may have paved the way for more obnoxious lawl random humor shows like Teen Titans GO and the Amazing World of Gumball.... But what started as a show about a boy and his stretchy dog going on adventures and making bacon pancakes slowly evolved into a post-apocalyptic nightmare multiverse drama about love, death, and finding yourself in the world you're stuck in, making the best of it with just a dash of LGBT brownie points by the end. (Thanks for the commitment... unlike SOME shows.... *cough cough Legend of Korra cough*). It got pretty muddy and a bit anime convoluted by the end, but nothing too absurd. At least not to me anyway. Although it has been a while since I've gone back and rewatched it since the series finale. So who knows if it still holds up. I also never watched the "Adventure Time: Distant Lands" extra thing that they did either.

So when I first saw the preview for this show, I was certain it was going to be just a spinoff focusing on the non-canon Rule 63 episodes of the show which were just stories made up by Ice King. Like, more stories or whatever. That's cute, I can live with that. But no... I was super wrong. This is straight up a sequel/continuation of Adventure Time after what I assume is the 2nd to last episode (since the last episode happens hundreds of years in the future or whatever) so I was pleasantly surprised. I will say that if you didn't keep up with the show... you will sadly be lost. Plenty of easter eggs and character references from the first show. Especially since the original had alternate realities, this show goes full multiverse. What makes it especially good to me is that it's no longer held back by being a CN show for children. I feel as though CN's better shows were held back by the "G" rating of not being aloud to be more adult. Especially Steven Universe and Regular Show. Such as the sexual euphemisms in SU, or the drinking soda instead of beer to get wasted in RS. The show finally feels right with the characters actually swearing instead of using dumbass replacement curse words like, "oh my glob" or "what the dip." Characters can also bleed and be horribly murdered. And there's even a bit of lewdness shoved in there too. The very first episode has Fionna just straight up drop her pants, flashing her panties. And the episodes after she's just been wearing her bra in short shorts.

While we're on the subject, they made Fionna an adult. They could have just as easily made her a teenager since she's just Rule 63 Finn. She lives by herself in an apartment and takes on a series of odd jobs. Thank fucking christ. That way no "Minor Whinners" can chime in with, "UMMM, ACTUALLY! FIONNA IS A TEENAGER SO UHHHH YEAH, IF YOU DRAW RULE 34 OF HER, THAT'S GONNA BE A BIG PROBLEM!!!" (Make sure to read that in the most over the top nerd voice you can imagine). They also made her a little more on the thicc side which I can definitely appreciate. They also created an even hotter version of Marceline, which I didn't even think was possible, that I WILL be drawing porn of at some point.

If you haven't seen the show yet, I highly recommend it. It's 8 episodes in as of now and updates every Thursday. Just know that the show isn't so much about Fionna and Cake, but mostly it's about Simon dealing with his PTSD about no longer being the Ice King. Again, if you didn't finish the original show, you'll be pretty lost. My only complaint as of now is that it's sadly an HBO MAX (or just MAX now I guess) Original... and any original show by them is a fucking death sentence. They LOVE cancelling their own shows! So I'm worried that with how good this show is, they'll most likely cancel it by the end of the first season....

"Shows cancelled!"
"But we didn't write an ending!"
"Yeah? Well tough shit! We're moving onto our all gay reboot of Dexter's Lab! That's the show everyone wants because we'll tell them it is!"

So last weekend, my Mom calls me up to tell me that she finally found a house to move into. This has been an ongoing struggle since Mother's Day when her landlord told her that she has until the end of September to find a new place because she's kicking them out. I'm not even joking... she told my Mom this on MOTHER'S DAY! So it's nice to finally get some good news for a change. Moving Day was set for Wednesday. They hired the same movers I did last year that charged $2000, but thanks to inflation... they're now charging $3000. My dad talked them down to $2700 if he moves the garage himself, which is where all the heaviest shit is at, so this makes no sense to me. So Thursday or Friday were planned to be garage moving day. Of course that's where I come in. "Can you help us move on Thursday or Friday, Ota?" Sure.... "Okay great! I'll give you a call to let you know when."

Sunday night. I'm taking a shower, as we all should often do, when I notice that my fucking ball cyst has come back again! Dude! Bro! Fucking no! You could not have picked a WORSE possible time to come back into my life! I am NOT going through this shit again! So the next day after work, I decided to take matters into my own hands. I took a scalpel annnnnd sliced the fucker open myself. Those Dr. Pimple Popper videos make it look so easy! Ya just give it a slice and out comes all of that nasty cottage cheese, right? Wrong. I got SOME of it out.... Let's say about, oh I don't know... 10%? Maybe? And after that came the pain. Keep in mind that this fucker is located directly next to my balls. I ignore it and go to pick up dinner with my roommate. Half way through dinner, I'm crying like a little girl and I go to bed. I ended up getting really sick with the chills and cold sweats and managed to sleep for 18 hours straight. Definitely called out of work on Tuesday.

By Wednesday, I was feeling much better. But also had to make up for lost time at work. So I busted my ass completing my list of chores and I only managed to miss 2, cleaning the restrooms and the office. I'll need to save those for Friday since Thursday is garage moving day. The cyst however has now doubled in size and I'm pretty sure I need to go to urgent care. On top of that... I couldn't help but notice how itchy my legs have gotten and finally gave them a good inspection to see that they were covered up and down and all around in mosquito bites. Fucking wonderful! My legs look like a god damn pizza! Where the hell did all of these come from! I already have a gaping wound between my legs! Now I have like 30 wounds below the belt! And they itch like crazy! I don't normally get swarmed by bug bites because I always thought they didn't like my blood type. But times sure have changed.

On Thursday I got up early to go to Urgent Care. The only Urgent care that will take my card is a 45 minute drive out of town. So needless to say it was gonna take a while. But hopefully I'll get done before my Mom calls me. Urgent Care went fine. They prescribed me some antibiotics yet again. But this time they're worried that a sack may have formed. If this has happened then it's just going to keep refilling over time and I'll need to have it surgically removed. Here's hoping it won't happen a third time. All things considered I made really good time and got home by 1pm. So now I was just waiting for the phone call. An hour passes. 2 hours, 4 hours, finally at 7pm when I'm out getting dinner my Mom calls and says, "What are you doing right now? What happened with helping us move!?" Uhhh... I've been waiting for your phone call all day! The only reason I didn't just show up whenever is because you said you'd call me because you told me you weren't sure if you were doing the move on Thursday or Friday.... We have now settled for me arriving at the house tomorrow.

Friday (today) Up at 8am and drive to the old house. My Dad pulls up at the same time. Dad says, "Oh I didn't think you were coming." I reply, "Yeah, mom asked me to be here-" doesn't even let me finish and interrupts, "Just start moving whatever shits left in the house!" So I do. Mom pulls up. We finish what's left and drive over to the new house. New house looks great btw. As we're unloading and moving stuff around I try breaking down pretty much everything I just typed to my Mom seeing as how we haven't had much face to face time since I moved out. She's not even listening and just keeps interrupting me for more stuff to move. I eventually just shut up completely until she asks a question I already answered. To which I reply, "You're not even listening to me." To which her response was, "Yeah, I guess I'm not." Like, I can just leave. I have no fucking horse in this race. Why are we the only 2 doing anything when there's 3 other people in the house right now sleeping past noon? I say, "Yeah, I'm gonna go." To which she then finally catches on and is like, "Wait no! I'm sorry don't go!" But she said it the way an annoyed bad friend would say it like, "GAAWWWD! I'm fuckin' sorry, okay!? What!? Stop being such a fuckin' pussy, bro! Get over it!" I then hang around for a bit while we have a long chat outside while she smokes. I think some stuff may have finally gotten through to her, but it really feels like everything I say just goes in one ear and out the other. Plus she's probably massively stressed because of the move and everything else going on. I then find out the real reason she wanted me to stay longer.... She asks, "Can I borrow $300?..." I give her $500 because I'm a chump and also a doormat. I then leave to go to work to finish the tasks I didn't complete. And I'll also be back at work tonight at midnight. My day isn't even over yet.

So let's review aka the TL;DR version:

I have an infected cyst right next to my balls that's causing a lot of pain and discomfort. My legs are covered in massive mosquito bites. Even when I move out, my family feels as though I still owe them my life and despite having no horse in this race, I still take time off work and give them money because I want them to be doing well and happy. Even though by next week they'll probably just need something else. I'm tired. I'm sick. I'm lonely. I'm always in some sort of pain. And yeah. I think this is it.

This is a followup to my birthday bitchfest back in March: https://www.furaffinity.net/view/51524958/ where I cried about having a terrible experience at the park that pretends to rival itself to Disneyland. What a joke. This journal will be pretty much the same. So if you don't wanna read about a 35 year old man child ranting about a children's theme park, I suggest you click off of this and do something better with your time. Okay, here goes:

I feel like I'm between a rock and a hard place when it came to getting this annual pass. I've been to the park 6 or 7 times now and every visit has either been miserable or moderately okay at best. It's hard to have a good time when you look at the prices of everything being 3 times the price it would anywhere else. And I live in California where fast food is now $20 a person give or take. Like the normal price of things is already ridiculous, these are straight up clown prices. On top of that, I made the mistake of not paying a little extra for the Gold Pass. I have the Silver Pass which does not cover parking, which is $30 just for general. If you want the fancy parking that's right in front of Citywalk... that shit will run you about $80-$100. Just to park your fucking car! You're not even inside the park yet!

Last time the roomies and I went, we all ended up getting Covid. Mostly because the park is ALWAYS packed! No matter what day we seem to go on, it is always jam fucking packed! But also, Californians LOVE to pretend that other people do not exist! They just look in the other direction and slam right into you! If I don't see it, it doesn't exist! Let me open mouth cough right in your face! Sure I'm sick and should have stayed home, but this is our family vacation! I'm not gonna let a little Covid get me down! So yeah, the idea of going back to the park was dwindling pretty thin at this point. Not the first time going got us sick either.

But Universal is sly fox, ya see. They sent me an email declaring that September is "Annual Passholder Appreciation Month" and if you come to the park before the 15th, you will receive a free Princess Peach magnet. Oh Universal, you naughty girl. Enticing me with promises of free Princess Peach swag. How did you know it was my only weakness! Needless to say, the bait worked! I talked the roomies into going this Sunday, but they wanted to go on Friday in the hopes that the park wouldn't be as packed. NOPE! It was almost as packed as when Nintendo World first opened! Could have sworn school just started but oh fucking well! Now to Universal's credit... I was fully expecting them to not have the free magnet and just be like, "Fresh out, tough shit." But no, they actually had it! So thank you for not lying directly to my face for once, Universal darling. Here it is in all of it's glory: https://twitter.com/OTACON_XIX/stat.....51101441671193

But surely we didn't drive all the way down here just to grab a free magnet, so naturally we spent the rest of the day at the park... in 95 degree weather. I don't know if you've ever been with a gigantic group of people in 95 degree desert heat... but it feels like being inside a literal oven ALL day. Not the parks fault, but the lines on top of being in direct sunlight was just painful. We were most excited to see what kind of Halloween decorations the park would be smothered in. It's nearly fall, time to put up those Halloween and harvest decorations, right!? I mean holy shit, Disneyland changes entire rides for Halloween, so what have you got for it, Universal!?.... Nothing.... As it turns out, all of their Halloween goodies go straight to "Halloween Horror Nights" which is a special event in which you pay double the amount of park admission to experience a fraction of the park at night. But don't worry! They've got plenty of fun stuff lined up, such as a spooky house! A spooky maze! Another spooky house with dudes in costume jumping out at you. Wow! What fun! Another thing they don't tell you is that the park CLOSES EARLY for the Halloween event. Oh sorry, did you think you were gonna be staying here until the park closes!? Nope! It's 4pm! We gotta get those black lights turned on in the spook house before the sun goes down in 5 hours. Get the fuck out or pay us more money! You'd think that since it was "ANNUAL PASS HOLDERS APPRECIATION MONTH" that we'd get like a one night free pass but NOOOO!!! You haven't spent enough money! Don't worry, we'll give you 10% discount or some shit!

We were at the very least trying to find some nice Halloween merch, which yes they did have. BUT more tricks up their sleeve. All of the Halloween merch was strategically placed in the display windows> So when we walked in, that display window was literally all they had. Shot glasses, coffin shaped boards, Ouija Board stuff, drinking glasses, masks, pins, and yeah that's pretty much it. All of these things were pretty much just stuff you could get at a Spirit store. Only difference is, Universal wrote "Halloween Horror Night 2023" on it. Oooooo, ahhhhh. $30 for a drinking glass sounds steep anywhere else, but knowing I'm getting such top dollar quality at Universal makes it worth the price.

Finally I'd like to talk about an incident that happened proving once and for all that the only people Universal hire are teenagers and prison convicts. Just before we left the park, we noticed that the noodle shop by the front entrance was pretty much the only thing in the park doing anything Halloween related. They turned the place into a Chucky themed restaurant with spooky dishes. The one that caught our attention was the Chucky funnel cake. And here's the picture we saw: https://cache.undercovertourist.com.....unnel-cake.jpg If the shitty Google link actually worked this time, what you should be seeing is a funnel cake topped with a mountain of whipped cream, Halloween sprinkles, a special blood sauce, topped with an adorable candy knife. This was up on the menu, which kept flashing in rotation to other dishes on the menu. I fucking HATE modern day tv menus. I can barely read them because of how shitty my eyes are, but on top of that I can only look at the item for 5 seconds before flashing to something else. So to try and save some time and confusion. I asked the cashier what the Chucky funnel cake comes with. The cashier... who clearly had some sort of... let's say, brain misplacement, says, "Duuuuuuuuh I don't know! He then turns back and looks at the menu and waits until it flashes back to the funnel cake. And when it does he goes, "Uhhhhh whipped cream? and red stuff?" To which we just say, "Alright we'll take 2 of them. They also had some spooky looking cocktails with candy eyeballs and cotton candy flavored whipped cream. Also sounded good and would be a nice addition to wash down the funnel cake. We pay, and JUST as we walk away from the register. Genius Cashier says, "Oh I forgot! The spooky drink is all gone!" At this point the manager stepped in because we were basically just like, okay? So what do we do? Our choice at this point was, "Well there's an even more expensive version of that drink that I can give you, but you'd have to pay the difference." Uhhh, how about for the inconvenience, you just make us the drink and call it a wash. "Nope! Sorry I can't do that!" Okay so let me get this straight. I now have to pay more money for a drink that I did not want because of YOUR fuckup!? And the manager was basically just like, "YEP, THERE'S NOTHING I CAN DO!" Okay then no, I don't want it. Give me a refund. We're given a refund but are still waiting for our funnel cakes. To which I whisper to the roomies, "How much you wanna bet that they're NOT going to give us what we orderd." To which they replied, "If that happens I'm getting a full refund." Well gosh and golly gee, I must be psychic! Because when our order was ready they handed us 2 funnel cakes with whipped cream. No sprinkles, no sauce, no candy knife. Like bro! We spent $18 each on fancy funnel cakes and you're just gonna try to gaslight us into think that this is what we ordered!? Coming from the same jackass who wanted us to pay the difference for an upgraded drink. We then say, "Umm no, this isn't what we ordered!" To which the manager was like, oh sorry, we'll add the strawberries that go on top." To which another employee chimed in and said, "We're out of the Chucky sauce." Then the Manger said, "No, the strawberries are what we add to the Chucky funnel cake!" Because we were standing right there. To which the employee double downs and she says, "Uh, no it's not." Manager responds with a more dire tone, " No! the STRAWBERRIES (*wink wink shut the fuck up!) is what we ADD to the CHUCKY funnel cake! (*wink wink, customers in ear shot you dumb bitch!) At that point we got a full refund. Also fuck this park and all who work at it. I'd also like to remind everyone that we were at an AMUSMENT PARK. There is a mile long line behind us as we speak and these dipshits are running around with there heads cutoff. Don't get me wrong, I know inventory is limited and you can run out of ingredients fast. But be upfront and honest about it. Don't fucking gaslight people into pretending the insanely overpriced shit we ordered was actually the cheaper version we're still charging you the full amount for you fucking scam artists.

I feel better just letting this all out, but my main point here is that as someone who has lived in California 99% of my entire life. I am just so fucking sick of shitty things costing so much fucking money for no reason. Theme parks are supposed to relieve stress not CAUSE it. And Universal Studios is now almost as expensive as Disneyland. This is like a State Fair trying to pass itself off as a luxury cruise line. No additions to the Nintendo gift shop either. You'd think that since Halloween is around the corner they'd get in some special Boo plushies, or even just Luigi with a vacuum cleaner on his back. But no... that would take time and effort. All of the Halloween merch was basically just ads for their Halloween Nights. Like holy shit Universal owns the OG black n white monsters! Dracula, Frankenstein's Monster, the Mummy, the Wolfman! Like dude! These fucker pioneered Halloween! And you're not gonna do anything with it!? Figure it out!

Before I wrap this shit up, my fears were true as they ARE building a new "Fast n Furious" roller coaster right next to the Simpsons area. I doubt it will be finished this year, but if it's done before March... Can't wait for the park to be even more crowded for one of the shittest movie series of all time.

Happy September! aka "Halloween part 1." This year has just been flying by! I can't believe we're almost at best holiday already. The roomies and I have already started decorating for Fall and Halloween (even though Fall doesn't start in California until god damn November....) Still, it's nice to get excited for at least one thing and for me it's always Fall/Halloween time. I've already got some pictures started for my "Halloween Harvest" folder and I eventually want to make some more Halloween themed treats. As far as art/commission plans go, I might do some more YCHs or perhaps offer a discount on Halloween themed commissions like I use to. I guess we'll see. Any spooky character ideas for art, feel free to suggest. Also, any Halloween traditions or things that you're looking forward to, I'd also love to hear about.

I'm really hoping for a great Fall this year. Fingers crossed!

So after 4 months and only 3 sessions of this shit I can say that not only is it not helping, it's making me feel even more anxious and upset every time I go. My therapist has also cancelled or rescheduled on me multiple times and on my second visit the receptionist told me that I didn't have an appointment today. Which is bullshit, because I'm not even the one who gets to pick the day I get to go! After getting frustrated and threating for a new therapist, they then magically found my appointment and blamed their stupidity on the computer. Yeah... I'm sure it was the fucking computer's fault.

I get the same stupid questions every time. Thinking of killing yourself? Harming others? Wanna be put on meds? I finally gave in last session and said yes to the meds if it'll finally just shut her the fuck up! So I've been on antidepressants for about 3 weeks now. I guess they have been working? Because I don't feel suicidal or as sad anymore. But at the same time I also don't feel happy. I just feel empty. Like everything now is just a constant state of "meh." Should I get up on time for work? Meh. Should I work on commissions? Meh. I'd say this is even more of a problem then being sad. At least when I'm sad I'm also putting myself down for not getting any work done. Being content with just laying in bed all day is not a good thing. During today's session I tried making it as crystal clear to my therapist as I could that this is my current state on the antidepressants. Her response was, "Well, the antidepressants aren't just a quick band-aid fix to all of your problems. Nothing is going to FIX you except yourself." Ohhhh ok.... Well then why the fuck did you want me on antidepressants so bad you stupid bitch!? It almost feels like she WAS hoping it would be a quick band-aid fix until it wasn't.

She then started asking a lot of questions that my parents still ask to this day. "What are your life goals?" "What do you think would make your life better?" To which my response was, "I don't know." Which she would not allow me to give as an answer. All of my dreams have been crushed. All of my goals I never accomplished. As it stands right now, my goal in life is to never become homeless. Despite telling me that there were no wrong answers beforehand... this was the wrong answer. She then wanted me to come up with my idealistic perfect world from sunup to sundown. Lady... do you honestly think I'm just going to drop all of that shit on you just on the fly? About how my dream life would be busty, horny, anime and furry women running around that let me have sex with them whenever I want? That I want to be a muscular twink with long black hair, pointy elf ears, and random powers I can just make up? NO! The less you know about me being a weird sex pervert the better. So because I didn't have answer for her, my response was, "More money and a my own house." I'm pretty sure this is a thing most people want. Her response was basically just, "Well what would that accomplish?"

Now I want to make something abundantly clear before I continue. I am NOT obsessed with money. Most of the time money changes people for the worst. But living in California has proven to me that you NEED to be rich in order to exist here. So my follow up response was, "Having money fixes all problems." Again, no WRONG answers according to her! Yet her response to that was, "Well is money going to fix your depression!?" I was fucking speechless. I still can't believe this cunt said this to me. From there I was DONE. Every question after that I just answered with "I don't know" because I knew it's what she didn't want to hear. She then asked how I was feeling and I just said, "anxious and I just wanna go home." To which she ended the session early. Thank fucking christ. She then asked if I wanted more sessions to which I replied, "no." She then tried asking the same shit that she has asked every single session that I have explained multiple times at this point that the answer is still NO. "Do you want to be put in group therapy?" NOOOO!!! If I can't even handle a one on one session... what makes you think I will do better in a group setting!? It's like having trouble with a math problem and then being told, well you just need MORE math problems!

At the end of the day, I'm right back where I started if not worse, because every session has me leaving in tears which I was under the impression that this was supposed to have an opposite effect, because that's what everyone has told me. And that's what pisses me off the most. Everyone just TELLS me what I should be doing, but nobody has the kind enough capacity to SHOW me what I should be doing. Which are two completely different things. For instance, I'm terrified of women and romance. I'd LOVE to have a girlfriend or at the very least someone who gives a shit about my well being... but I'm too nervous and awkward and I don't know how to get over it. What should I do? The response I always here is just, "Well you should get over it and just do it!" Like WOW WOW! That really fucking helped! I'm breaking down in tears almost every day and I don't know how to help myself! "Oh man that sucks! Tough shit! Have you tried NOT being sad!? The only person who can help you is yourself! Here's "Maslow's Hierarchy of Needs" again for the 100th time!"

There I go again. Back to being sad and upset.

Not that they were ever closed, but my log is completely clear as of now. I even managed to finish all of the secret backlogged comics I owed that will never be posted! I've also recovered from all illnesses including the dreaded C-19, so if you've been looking to have some stuff drawn I'm ready to go! In the mean time, I will be steadily working on summer beach pics and my comic I hate/love. Also most likely some more Splatoon porn because summer is a great time to draw it. Who am I kidding? It's always a good time to draw Splatoon porn! Also a reminder that I still do custom bead sprites so if you have a design in mind, send me a note!

Art Commissions: https://www.furaffinity.net/view/50766233/
Bead Commissions: https://www.furaffinity.net/view/27339322/

No pressure, but as always first come first serve. Unless you commission a comic. That's gonna take me a while. Shoot me a note with any questions you may have. The worst I will ever say is "no I don't wanna draw that." I'm not here to judge.

Well this sucks. My roommate Nicole ended up catching Covid and despite being extra careful and quarantining herself in her room... I ended up catching it too. Frankly I'm surprised I didn't catch it sooner seeing as how my immune system is dog shit and I get sick super easy all the time. Aside from sleeping for 15 hours last night and still being tired, I don't feel too horrible. Was definitely in worse shape the last time I got sick so fingers crossed that I won't be getting any worse and this passes quick. Before anyone asks, yes I am vaccinated, but I never got the booster. I should really get on that soon. Until I feel better, I guess this gives me plenty of time to get some art work done if I'm feeling up to it.

Any of you get Covid? What was it like? How long were you bedridden for?

Final reminder about the YCH auction that ends on July 1st:

#1 - https://www.furaffinity.net/view/52619508/
#2 - https://www.furaffinity.net/view/52619524/
#3 - https://www.furaffinity.net/view/52619535/

Only one bid so far for #3, but there's still time to get in on any of them. This time around if the other two don't get claimed, instead of posting them again a few weeks later and going for a round 2, I'm just going to use a character of my own choosing. So once these are gone, they're gone. No biggie.

Before I even had a chance to watch the latest Nintendo Direct, Twitter lost it's fucking shit over a screenshot of Super Mario turning into an anthropomorphic elephant man from the up and coming "Super Mario Bros. Wonder" (which looks like they just combined Rayman Legends with Donkey Kong Tropical Freeze). We don't know much about this power up yet. Only that the internet doesn't like it, and it already has over 10 Rule34 results. Like, Jesus Christ people... how are you STILL surprised by this? You know like at least 50 furry artists watch these fucking Nintendo Directs with their tablet in hand, waiting with baited breath to be the first to draw porn of anything they can find, right? It happens 100% of every Nintendo Direct. Be it a new Pokemon, or a Splatoon character with a big fat ass. Yet people are still surprised by this. WHY!?

So yes, I totally understand why they made Mario an elephant. Because if they made him a tiger, or a wolf, or even a cool looking bird, we would have most likely seen an avalanche of confirmed Mario furry porn. Among the furry community, elephants are a pretty uncommon fursona choice. I've seen a couple of them, but they're practically non-existent. So yes, I feel as though Elephant Mario was a decision based on this in mind. I could be wrong, and they just wanted to try something radically different. But I'm still not sure why this powerup in particular is getting so much bitter hatred. It's JUST a powerup ya'll, Mario isn't canonically becoming an elephant man for the rest of his days. Ya'll should be directing that same hatred to the stupid Rabbid crossovers instead. Now that shit deserves actual criticism....

In lighter news, they made Peach a SHORTSTACK!: https://assets-prd.ignimgs.com/2023.....7358849139.jpg Just look at how fucking cute she is! I need a figure of this! Drop the elephant shit and get to work on pornifying that instead!

Was scheduled to go in on Wednesday at 3:30pm where I normally get off work at 4pm. Took off work a little early to get there. Waited 45 minutes, despite having an appointment, to have my therapist tell me that she cannot see me today because they had a "mental incident." Whatever the hell that means. She didn't elaborate and I didn't press her with follow up questions. Also, another client I guess has been waiting here for an hour and they close at 4pm. Kinda weird that my appointment was at 3:30pm, 30 minutes before they close for what I assumed was a full hour session. But whatever, I said that's okay. She followed up with the same stupid questions she asked me many times in different ways of saying it:

"Are you feeling suicidal?"
"Are you having feelings of harming yourself?"
"Are you having feelings of hurting other people?"

No.

After that she said she can't see me again until a month from now. I said, "okay...." She followed with, "But don't worry, I'll give you a call tomorrow and we can have a phone therapy session. I'll also call you throughout the week until our next appointment. Does 10am work for you?" I say, sure. She escorts me out. Cut to tomorrow. Set my alarm for 9am so I can wake up and have a cup of coffee and hopefully not sound tired over the phone. She never called. It is now the end of Sunday. She never called....

So yeah. Already off to a great start I'd say. I was kind of under the impression that the entire point of therapy was that the person you're talking with is supposed to, ya know... CARE? But I guess I was wrong and that everyone else was right that therapy was the right decision. Yep. I suuuuure am glad that I keep doing things that other people tell me I should do to feel better. :)

So after an extensive combing of my gallery, twice, I have purged it of all potential non-compliance submissions. Which brings the grand total to...

3.... I deleted 3 submissions.

Truth be told, I'm not too worried about the rule changes, especially after the collar stretching, backpedalling update journals. My only characters I'm worried about are Ruby: https://www.furaffinity.net/view/44381650/ since she's short and doesn't have any tits. Not that I draw her all that often though. But the main one I'm super worried about is Squibby: https://www.furaffinity.net/view/43104864/ I always make sure to draw her with massive ass n tits... but she's still a Splatoon inkling. Despite being an adult, I'm sure there's plenty of "Minor Whiners" out there to deal the underaged card. I draw a LOT of Splatoon stuff, so I really hope it's not also on the chopping block. And no, I haven't attempted the trouble ticket thing they said to do. One, because I don't have the time to ask for permission if all of baby's artwork gets to stay up on the fridge. And two, my previous experience with help tickets on this site is exactly the same as dealing with medical professionals in California; they don't give a shit. Every help ticket and/or DM I have ever sent has gone unanswered and ignored. So not doing that.

Let's be real... what this really boils down to is what ALL online activity boils down to: "HOW POPULAR YOU ARE!" I am not a Popufur. (Are we still saying Popufur or did we move onto something else?) I've been on this site for over 14 years and I still haven't even broken 1K Watchers. I'd say that's pretty pathetic. Therefore I'm not that high of flight risk and hopefully don't have obsessive fans/haters that are jealous of my mediocrity of constantly drawing my stupid albino elf man sticking his penis in cartoon characters. On the off chance that my gallery does get targeted... well... they can take what they will, I suppose, and then I just won't upload it again. They said they weren't going to straight up ban anyone for it, so only time will tell.

But until they do ban me I don't think I'll ever stop uploading to FA because... well, in all honesty, FA is the ONLY site I make commission money from. Twitter, Instagram, Facebook, Pillowfort, Kofi, Patreon, SubStar, Itaku, all these garbage shit websites you all wanted me to use SO bad are just awful... and I don't get them. FA has at least maintained a small form of consistency right up until they """""fixed...""""" the upload size and locked higher resolutions behind a paywall. I pray that more stupid decisions will not follow, but we shall see.

https://www.furaffinity.net/journal/10552819

So I don't know if FA is just trying to kill itself the way Tumblr did, but ya'll are making the dumbest decisions right now. I am so sick of using the term "prevent minors from being exploited." It's a fucking DRAWING. It's NOT real. It doesn't exist! It doesn't think, or feel, or get hurt! It's segments of lines and color that has tricked our brains into thinking it represents something that's alive, but it's not! Stop thinking things that aren't real have human rights! If it's straight up cub or loli shit, like wearing a diaper... I get it. Don't upload that shit here. But there is WAY too many vague examples that could get us in trouble.

There's not too many policy changes I've been stressing on up to this point... but this one really hits home. Half of my damn catalog could be considered """underaged""" purely based on look or CANON. Midna, Splatoon, Animal Crossing, Sailor Moon, let us not forget the Disney Princess debacle.... Am I going to need to purge my gallery of all of these submissions because some asshole might be like, "Um actually... Raven from Teen Titans is canonically 14... so um, yeah, no, you need to take that down even though you clearly drew her with massive titties and a taller frame, fuck you!"

What about flat chested characters? What about characters that just so happen to be short? Sorry to all women who aren't tall and don't have big tits. You should have known better and got taller and also grew your tits bigger you fucking freak. Go back to grade scholl until you grow up. I suppose all shortstacks are now on the chopping block. What about the polar opposite against the "1000 year old loli demon" debate? Such as the gems from Steven Universe who are born as full grown women? If you're gonna ban canonically underaged characters you should also ban all the gems too, seeing as how they don't age and are canonically newborns through the entire series. Am I thinking about this too hard? Oh it doesn't matter if they LOOK like adults it only matters if they look like kids. Okay. Stop pretending drawings are real!

At the end of the day you're not actually trying to "prevent minors from being exploited." You're just trying to make your image look better for advertisers because everyone is fucking terrified of being labeled a pedophile. It's a death sentence at this point. "Oh you have an OC that's short and flat!? CHILD PORN!!" It's fucking disgusting that that's the first thing someone's brain will go to. What the fuck does that even say about you? I have literally seen 30 year old cosplayers get death threats on Twitter for being short. Despite being 30, they are short and so are children, therefore this woman is a child. Stop trying to look sexy, child woman. This shit needs to STOP....

I can only hope that this is the usual FA shit where they're just pretending to care, but actually don't give a fuck and are just throwing this out there for brownie points. But if this becomes something equivalent to a YouTube or Twitter purge... then I guess it really is finally time to move onto greener pastures if they even exist. Thank you for making this your priority, FA. Any word on GIVING US FUCKING MP4 OR WEBM UPLOADING YET!?!

STOP! PRETENDING! DRAWINGS! ARE! REAL!!!