Forgot to add that i'm also planning to get a Pet.
Feel free to help me in this decision, tho i'm mostly narrowed down already in this regard.
Considered it for a very long time but always end up argueing against getting a Pet since i wasn't sure if i would be able to take proper care of it with all the mental struggles and Stuff going on.

But now with my mental Health improving and having Backup, i can finally make my Steps toward it.
First of all i would need to get properly prepared, taking a lot of stuff into consideration like finances, Vets and Shops nearby, Equipment, is my home big enough etc.

Then also what type of Pet, i grew up mostly with Cats, but wouldn't wanna wish for a Cat myself.
I tend overall towards a mammal or reptile, nothing aquatic or crawling x_x
Rabbits probably not (my relationship with them is kinda fucked since i grew up rural and if you know, you know)

The obvious Choice would be Rats, but they don't live that long sadly :(
I was always a Dog Person, here i would very likely need the most advice from shelters, vets, dog schools.
Not really a fan of small Dogs or how we call them in Germany "Fußhupen"
There are some really nice smaller Dogs, there are some really ugly smaller Dogs, but overall they're not really appealing to me.
Tormentbreeds are obviously a big NO (like Pugs etc.) unless it's literally a rescue and no one get's some value out of breeding or selling them, at least giving them someone to take care of them for the rest of their life. (Tho this might sadly not work financially for me regarding Vet costs and Stuff)

If anyone can recommend certain breeds, feel free to let me know
As i mentioned i'm from germany, so take into consideration that not everything you recommend might be available here :P

Here's some Info and stuff:
1. I got a rather small and compact place (there are no potential hazards, it's just very limited)
So a Type of House Dog would make most sense with a rather chill and relaxed Spirit
The guy who lived here before me also had a Dog (Retriever)
2. There is plenty of room to take Walks in my Area, it's mostly quiet here, but in order to get to Dog Schools, Vets, Shops etc. i would have to drive or take public transport
So some advice regarding transportation/Drives would be welcome
3. I never had allergies regarding Dogs, but i would overall like a Dog that doesn't hair excessively and wouldn't require a lot of Furcare
4. We have a mixxed Climate here around the year, but it tends to get hotter and not colder over the last Decade.
5. What's some stuff i should definetily take care of first before getting a Dog?
6. What's some stuff i should definetily beware of (at home but also outside) that can be dangerous for me or my Dog?
7. All the medical Stuff i'll be talking trough with a vet before getting a Dog
8. I'm obviously planning to draw a lot, what's some good time patterns to keep up with so the Dog will not feel neglected, but gives me still enough time to focus and do my Art?
9. What's some red flags i should be aware of when it comes to Dog Behaviour? (Injuries, Sickness, Mental Distress etc.)
10. Anything i should take in consideration when coming back from Walks? (Like checking for ticks and stuff like that)
11. Some stuff i should avoid bringing my Dog close to? (In terms of risks of parasites that can be dangerous for the Dog or even myself)

Type of Dogs i personally favor the most (The Order in which they're listed here doesn't matter)
Remember, i'm not an experienced Dog owner, so take that into consideration! But i'm willing to invest as much time is needed to train them
- Rottweilers
- Dobermann
- Retrievers
- Shepherds
- Border Collies
- Bernese
- Ainus and Shiba
- Dalmatians
- Samojede/Samojedskaja's
- Akbash
- Boxers
- Ca de Bestiar
- That Irish ones which names i forgot (lmao)
- Laika (Yup the Breed is called just like the Dog they send to space)

There is probably many more that are very similar to the ones listed, so feel free to tell me about them :)

I'm super happy and motivated right now
Finally caught up with one of my closest Friends after not having spoken much for almost a Year
That was legit the biggest Boost for my Mood and against my Depression that i needed all this time.

I hope that finally gives my mind some rest and let me focus more again without microfixing everything in my Painting
Feel free to join in after about 30 Minutes, gonna grab some Food and then keep drawing live on
https://picarto.tv/PawstaTheRat

I know that i've spend a lot of time already and going quite slow, wasting too much time on details no one will probably see
But i really wanna nail that down as good as i can, not just for everyone else, but mostly for myself.
My Medications, as much as they help me with drawing sadly also have a side-effect pushing my hyperfixation, really need to learn to manage them better and take breaks

I probably won't be uploading anything else for the rest of the Year, since the only Stuff left besides for that drawing are private Commissions and coloring requests
Then there is also a lot of IRL Stuff during the Holidays including my Trip and Birthday soon, so i won't have time to draw for at least 4+ Days from 20-24th December
As for the next Year / January:

- IRL Stuff around Mid January regarding Therapy and Stuff (this i have less control over, so it can kinda fuck up my Plans, take that in consideration)
- A Friend of mine wants me to help him with Concept Art for his Worldbuilding (will be uploaded later once it's done and take a lot of time to do) - (or February) -
- Bitfang gets a free Commission in my painting Style for helping and teaching me so much
- With my Medication i've experienced that i'm able to actually learn better and keep focus way longer, so a lot of time in the entire year of 2026 i'll invest in learning.
Less yanky drawings and plain sketching, less sticking to references.

Instead for 2026 i will focus on:
- more concept Drawings
- better Anatomy
- new Character Designs
- Fursona Reworks
- getting into 3D Modeling Programs
- Animations
- Collaborations

I'm trying to get my painting style more consistent and also faster, so it will be available to commission someday aswell
For anyone who wants to have super detailed Commissions later
Speaking of Commissions:
I won't be able to take any Commissions for 2025
If you want one, i can put you on a waiting List, but expect to wait at least till January
While i'm still trying to get my Painting Styles more consistent and faster, any painting commission will just cost as much as a normal Commission would
Finishing them will just take more time, but the Details will be super worth it and it's a good practice for me :3

Sry went offline for quite some time, i'm having issues recently with my internet connection and for some reason it shows me my time isn't configurated correctly.
But it is

Hey, is there any program that acts like a cube
For example you draw an angle and then adjust the angle to the cube, kinda "connect it" to the cube
and then you can move the cube around to see it from different angles
and kinda draw the missing information on another angle next till you have the whole 3D body

Hey hey,
had an idea earlier in Stream that might sound fun

How about some sort of "Draw along Stream"
Not just for new Artists, but also for anyone who is interested in picking up a pen.
All you need is a drawing Program and you own tools of choice (mouse keyboard, pen and phone, drawing pad etc.)

The idea behind it would be to do some sort of training stream
In which you can either decide to bring your own uncolored base/sketch or i can provide something to train on
And then going step by step together with you to make some basic concepts understandable

Best would be to bring your own bases/sketches, otherwise like i said i would provide different ones so 2-3 people (or more depending on interest)
have the same sort of base, while other groups have another base to work on, so people can uniquely learn to adapt and test what they learned, without just 100% copying the shading for the same base.
And even if it wouldn't work out, you have tried and that would stick with you for a while whenever you try again :)

I will try to explain everything in my own words, since i'm also mostly self taught by trial and error (and with a little help of other artists like bitfang)
And if you're neurodiverse you might be able to relate A LOT to me when i say that you cannot simply sit down and read or watch a video, you need someone by your side going trough it or giving you feedback as you do!

Everyone can learn to draw
just like everyone can learn to write

Give it a try, let me know what you think!
And if you like to join (hardest would be timezones, but i can make multiple streams on different times if there is enough people interested!)

Tried 30mg one more time today as a control to my last 30mg Dose
Everything was dope for the most part, BUT i ended up streaming today for more then 8 fuckin Hours without break x_x

So yeah, same side effect with me not stopping, but at least i didn't got stuck like last time on the same thing.
Actually, i've made great progress today on the Drawing ^-^
Still, that's not healthy, so i'll stick with the 20mg + 10mg as estimated

I'm a bit on Edge since i also haven't drink or eat anything during Stream which is also not a good thing at all o_o

Hey hey, so Firefox Updated yesterday and changed the Baar to be like a Fat Blue one which is super annoying to me.
I've installed https://github.com/black7375/Firefox-UI-Fix
now which works perfectly, BESIDES for the writing being Black on Grey unless the tab is active, then it's white writing on Grey.

From Windows Side i am using a contrast profile, most of my windows are black with white writing.
Any idea how i could change the writing in the inactive tabs to also be portraited in white?

Thanks!

Uuuuhhhhhh
Yesterday i took 20 mg then 10mg after about 8 hours
Kinda groved out the evening but i didn't really draw more

Today i took my first 30mg Medikinet and what can i say...
I was not productive... not at all...
Well depends on how you see Productivity...
I did Chat A LOT and was very happy and motivated in that regard

But for Fox Sake x_x
I did not get anywhere drawing
Even worse, i worked on the same Part for like 4+ Hours trying to "fix" it and get it perfect,
just to never achieve that at all.

I feel like the 30mg made me overfocusing rather then helping me

Hey hey
Update post regarding Art:

Don't worry i've haven't posted in like 2 weeks now
As you noticed i'm trying new meds and i'm also busy with some IRL Stuff in case you worried
I'm actually mentally very positive this weeks, just super busy for the most part with therapy and all that

I plan to do another Livestream soon once i can find the time for it,
meanwhile i'm working on a private commission and a coloring commission first
But i think i'll be going live somewhere around friday or on the Weekend

So feel free to follow Pawsta on Picarto if you haven't!
I plan to do Art Streams more frequently in the future :)

Just felt after a conversation with a Friend to state the obvious (duh!)
Trans people are awesome and you shouldn't ask yourself if you "deserve" to exist
Neither do you have to take shit from someone asking you if you do, whoever asks something like this should first ask it to themselfs

I want YOU to know that you're loved and don't ever let anyone tell you otherwise
And as much shit is going on in the world right now, you're not alone.
A lot of anti-trans shit appears bigger then it is, very much on social media where algorithms (especially controlled by certain individuals/groups)
favor dispute and hatred, aswell as political violence and inhumanity.

And as much as this hatred and violence against you grew bigger over the last decade,
so did the support for you, even if often overlooked or downplayed.
Not many people might state it, especially when i think about my parents generation and so on
who try to stay out of the conversation and very often say the wrong things and have a hard time to understand.
But even a lot of them are catching up once the surface have been scratched away.
And even they see you've been targeted, so they can push the blame on you and distract from themselfs.

Medially it's more spoken about people who have been assaulted etc.
then people who prevented them and who make sure communities stay safe

Neither do i want to downplay the issues you're facing every day, also locally in your neighbourhoods. In your States, in your Country.
That's not my intention here, that happens and you know that first Hand
But that's not how the entire world see's you. That's a bunch of imbeciles who try to scapegoat you, while trying to make sure to not be hold accountable for their perverted Worldview.
Oh but they will be fuckin hold accountable and YOU must stay alive and keep fighting so as many of these morons get what they fucking deserve.
Aswell as their enablers and the Social Media Moguls who are pushing Hatred globally

We fight for you
We fight with you
And we love you

TRANS FUCKING RIGHTS 🏳️‍⚧️

Another RL Post also for myself to reflect on it, feel free to skip

Day 4 with 20 mg : Very confident that it helps me with drawing and getting shit done, wears off after like 6 Hours
Day 5 with 20 mg: I was kinda ecstatic, too much energy, immidiately went Livestreaming Art. Felt really good, a bit too good
I think that was in combination with music and Coffee (Coffee usually dont have any effect on me)
Day 6 with 20 mg: Same as Day 4, overall pretty chill day but i was able to focus very well, get stuff done and draw. Neat!

Tomorrow I'll be trying 30 mg according to the sheet my Therapist gave me.
Depending on that i will check on how to proceed, if it feels like too much -> i plan to try 20 mg first as before and 10 mg after 6 hours.
I don't think i would need to go up to 40 mg and also Day 5 seems to be the summary of other influences aswell

Right now with 20 mg i still feel a weight on me that stops me from starting with things,
but to an extend i can handle to get me going after a while.
If 30 mg works better in that regard, it would be awesome :3

And yup my Therapist gave me permission to change the dosing, but only increasing by 10 mg every 4th day

Another Update regarding my Meds.
I can clearly say that it helps me with Drawing, it's a bit like tuning down some of the choices in my brain and going more towards those, that make the most sense.

Sketching different poses today felt way better, i might still have a similar amount of errors i'll do on concept,
but it takes less time for me to correctly fix stuff without taking multiple breaks to "reset" my eyes.
I want to see how it will develop further, i might actually start picking up to try animating again or finally
rework some of my stuff to be painting Style like i did with Chopper.

The overall anxiety has also tuned down a bit, making it easier for me to actually start things and not overthink too much how much time it would take and bla bla

Catching up with the last Game on my List now
Feel free to join in
https://picarto.tv/PawstaTheRat

Hey, Pawsta here.
I was literally just watching Zootopia 2 yesterday in the Theatre and today i got multiple Videos on Youtube recommended to me
(i was checking the Old Trailers to see what all they've changed in the Movie)
This Videos were Phone recordings from different scenes of the Movie, just a few days after the movie was played in the theatres.
ON FUCKING YOUTUBE, most of them uploaded by Furries (you can tell by their Profiles)

This really fucking pisses me off.
I do not care if you do piracy, usually that stuff isn't as public as on youtube and you actually have to find things first.
But that was literally just massive spoiler material uploaded by a bunch of fucktwats who just only think of themselfs and no one fucking else.
Have some fucking dignity, you spoiled little shits

/rant over

Zootopia 2 was really amazing, was watching it today in 3D
Can highly recommend watching it in 3D, it's definetily worth it.

I will not elaborate further on the Movie, go watch it for yourself.
It's so good, love the Fur Details

Little heads up:
I will not take commissions between 20-26th December (Birthday, Holidays, you get it)
All the other Days this Months i'm open for Commissions

Found this Digimon Animation and just had to share it
I really love the Style used in these, make sure to leave a nice Comment and Subscribe to him if you like it
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=nnMXC0nmTF4

Got my ADHD Diagnosis finally today.
Therapist said to start with a 10 mg dosis and then try to increase it by 10 mg after 3 Days to see if it fits me.
Up to 40 mg, afterwards i should reconsider talking with him again first


For people who are also diagnosed with ADHD, how should i handle this best?
Let's say in case that i see that it helps me with about 20 mg, should i go and try 30 mg to see if it helps me even more
or should i stop increasing/testing the dose the moment i feel an effect?

Also what if i forget to take them / take a break from them, should i then start with 10 mg again or should i go instantly back to the level i was before?

Hey everyone, feel free to suggest any Final Fantasy Characters you would like to see.
Felt like drawing something from Final Fantasy next, any Game

The Game was fantastic and the New Game + lets me keep finished Sidequests and Stuff, so going to 100% the Game.
Feel free to join in :3
https://picarto.tv/PawstaTheRat

Nanaki has a NSFW Mod so don't wonder xD

Feel free to join and Chat :3
https://picarto.tv/PawstaTheRat

Come and join me
https://picarto.tv/PawstaTheRat

# Might go randomly afk once since i wait for a Call

Feel free to join in
https://picarto.tv/PawstaTheRat

Will be unavailable for Commissions until November 25th, gotta catch up with some private Stuff first.
But you can reserve a Commission if you want and i'll start with it right away once i'm back

This is not just an massive Attack to your personal Data, it's a very fast step towards fascism and they try to box it trough within the matter of hours!
This is actively attacking your worker rights, privacy, personal Data etc. // THIS ALSO includes your sensitive Data like your Sexuality, Religion, Political Beliefs etc.

The whole Article can be found here:
https://noyb.eu/en/eu-commission-ab.....rinciples-gdpr

I haven't heard about this until literally today and this shit is on the way as i write this Journal.
We really need to step up developing tools that actively poisons AI, especially in regards of personal Data like Photo's, Voices etc.