Hello,
It's a.. Pretty weird journal if I can say, i'm pretty sure not much people will read more than 3 lines; but im reaching a point where I dont have much place to express myself, and since it's touching my drawings too, I feel like I still had to post it here..
ive,, always been an extremely anxious and paranoiac person, it's getting worse lately, i've met new people i enjoyed talking to, and now it's just turning into hell; I'm feeling ignored, im sure i'm a boring and whiny person, i actually know talking with me is not fun and probably draining, just a chore but at this point I just dont know..
I feel like anything I do is just bad and not cared for, it's not 'important' nor special, no one will cherish or be happy to see something i've made for them; and I'm talking of pretty much anything, art and rp, irl surprises or gifts too.
Ive been struggling with my art for so long, and I really can't stand it that much anymore. I dislike it to the bones, the few 'nice' pieces I have, i just spot or get told all the mistakes in them and then that's it.
I can't sell, nor merch i've made or commissions, but I'm so desperate and in need of income I still have to stay open for the maybe two peoples who will be nice enough to get something from me.. I've always been a very slow person, and for what results ? It make me feel so bad when I actually get commissions, I just feel the need to apologise for the finished product,
But I know, I met an artist one that had 'pay what you can' kind of commissions, and I think I'm just gonna do that; i'm not sure of how it'ill works, I'll probably accept any kind of com for whatever price, but I suppose it'll allow me to also take a bit of time to make them, and also theres no disappointment ? If you dont like it, dont pay, its fine, and i understand, i wouldnt either lmao
i guess i'm gonna make some kind of post for it, im even too scared to post any kind of price sheets for my commissions, its not even worth it and I dont want it to be rubbed back into my face,
sorry, I just.. really needed to express it somewhere, my other social media didn't allow me to vent that way, so sorry for probably giving a dumb journal notification, but thanks for the patience,
FA+
Shop
