https://curiouscat.me/purpley_cat

Ask junk. If you want. Please?

Looks like AngelMori and I are going to be at FWA this year! :D

AngelMori helps a friend of his run her dealers booth and she had two events to do so she's sending us to run the booth at Furry Weekend Atlanta. We will be selling handmade leather goods, mostly kinky stuff. (Floggers, and collars, and whips, oh my!)

Any one else going to be there?

I know, I know. I haven't been posting anything lately. I want to draw, I really do. It's just that between school, work, and trying to have a social life (so I don't slip into a pit of depression), I'm finding that I have no energy at the end of the day for creating. I do find however, on the few occasions I've managed to do some simple sketching, that my style is... well, malleable, I guess would be the word. It's nice sometimes. Like when I want to draw my favorite cartoon character. But it kinda sucks the rest of the time. Trying to consistently draw one of my own characters with my own style is completely impossible, when I can't seem to FIND my own style. It's frustrating to say the least.


Did anyone else have trouble finding their own, individual style at first? Is there any hope for me? Tips to help me figure it out faster? Or is this one of those things that "just take time?" -sigh-

So I finally got my tablet up and running. I'm using ArtRage Studio right now, but I'm open to suggestions for good (affordable) programs for drawing. ArtRage came as a free download with my Intuos. It took a LOT of getting used to but I think I'm starting to get the hang of it. I did the Wheatley drawing that I recently posted with it, as opposed to doing a sketch on my iPad then doing lineart and coloring on the Intuos. Now it feels pretty natural to work with the tablet, and I enjoy having access to the more advanced programs and tools.

Anywho. I'd better get off here and get ready for work if I don't want to be late I have a long night ahead of me and a scolding for tardiness is the last thing I need.

Signing off.

-Cat-

This iPad. Hnnnngh.

It's positively addicting. I can't stop myself from doodling.

On one hand it's great. It encourages me to keep drawing. Even when it doesn't turn out right. I keep trying. When I see something that sparks an inspiration I don't just try to put it out of my head anymore. Instead I pick up my iPad and start drawing. I don't get as frustrated when it doesn't come out exactly right, I'm just glad it got recorded. I want to see what I can do with all the tools I now have at my disposal.

On the other hand I find myself drawing when I should really be doing other things. Like homework. Or eating. Or sleeping.

It's exhausting.

I was right. I had my hunches about what Boots was doing for my b-day and I was right. ^.^ He's getting me set up to digital art, but going WAY above and beyond as usual.

The long term goal is to buy me an iPad and the Wacom Intuos Creative Stylus 2. It will be an awesome creative tool for me: it's portable (I'm super busy and not always at home when the creative mood strikes), versatile, and there are several apps that will connect it to a computer and basically turn it into a Cintiq. I'll be able to use it for quick sketches on the go as well as more involved work at home with my computer and whatever creative software I decide on. It will come in handy for my photography and I might actually start learning more about photo-editing. And it will also provide the dual purpose of giving me a tablet I can use during my final two semesters of college. I'll be able to take notes, do homework, all sorts of awesome stuff.

However, this IS a long term goal. We aren't exactly rich, and we're looking around to try and find a good iPad at a price that won't completely blow his budget.

So in the meantime he plans to get me something to fiddle with and try my hand at. He wants to take me to the store sometime this week and get me a regular drawing tablet. He doesn't want me to have to wait a month, two, however long it takes to find the iPad we want. We'll probably get the Intuos Pen, or Pen and Touch.

I tried to talk him out of it, cause I'm fine to wait. But he's more stubborn than I am, which is saying something. So the argument went something like this:

"I can wait, and I don't wanna spend money on something I might just get frustrated with and give up on."

"Well, [mutual friend] said he would give you lessons and help you figure it all out. Besides, I wanna try it too."

"But you don't need to buy both for me, it's too much money."

"It is not. Besides. I didn't get you anything big for Christmas. And I have a good job. I can afford it."

So long story short, Boots is the best boy-thing in the world and I love him sooooooooooooo much.

So I'll start of with the bad news, so maybe I can end this journal on a good note.

Bad news: My wisdom teeth have finally decided to stir. I can hardly open my mouth to eat without it hurting so badly I start feeling sick to my stomach. I'm fairly certain the only option is to go get them removed. Unfortunately I have no insurance, my school clinic doesn't offer dental services, and the local health department only offers them if you're 21 years old or younger, and I'm a full time student/part time cashier and I don't have the kind of money I'd need to pay for the operation out of pocket. I don't wanna ask my family or Boots for money for this, as they've all already helped me so much I'll never be able to repay them. So I've been popping ibuprofen like candy and I'm sitting here, dreading work, and trying to do homework one-handed while I hold an ice pack to the side of my face in hopes of numbing a little bit of the pain. So far it's not helping. At all.

Good news: My birthday is ten days away! Yaaaaay! My roommate, Boots and I are all having a little party this weekend to celebrate, since we all have birthdays this month. I think Boots probably has something awesome planned for me, since he's been plotting for over a week now. (He's not good at hiding the plotting part, but pretty good at keeping actual specific details from me, so I have no real clue as to what he's doing.) I need to figure out something awesome for him.

More good news: By the end of this month I will be officially ONE YEAR away from graduating from college. Only 8 courses (6 animal science, and 2 stem electives) stand between me and a bachelor's degree in animal science. I'm SUPER excited, but also sorta terrified. But... OMG 8 MORE CLASSES AND I'M DONE WITH SCHOOL. AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!

I was supposed to be cleaning my room this afternoon, but all I've managed to do is fall asleep watching netflix and lay around feeling... well... blech. I couldn't figure out why. I've been in a bad mood all day too, stressed out, easy to irritate.

I got pissed off in lab cause I tried to ask a question about the ECG lab we were doing and the TA didn't listen to what I was saying and answered a completely different question than I was asking. Normally I would just brush it off, since I'm sure the answer she gave me was to a question she was getting a lot from other people. But today it got me so tense and frustrated I ended up smoking a cigarette on the way home- something I usually don't do.

And I was just sitting here, thinking that there must be something wrong with me, and that I'm completely crazy and then it hit me.

I visited my hometown the other night and when I left I forgot my watch. My dad said he would mail it, but for the moment I'm without it. Now you might think I'm crazy. Why would my lack of a watch mess with my stress and depression? Well aside from my strange need to constantly know what time it is, my watch fulfills a very important role. It has a little alarm on it that goes off every night and reminds me to shove a birth control pill down my throat. A little pill that has the tiny, beautiful side effect of toning down my anxiety and boosting my mood so I don't get as easily depressed. Checked my pack and lo and behold, I missed my pill last night. No wonder.

*sighs and pops last night's and tonight's pill* Here's to hoping for a better tomorrow, and faster mail.

So yeah. I'm here. I'm alive, though you might not be able to tell from the looks of my page. I've been doing a little sketching and for the first time in years it didn't come out looking like shite. So, maybe it'll get posted later. It's just a quick portrait I did of my fursona, which is kinda still in the works (partly cause I'm crap at coloring, so I don't know how to figure out what her fur looks like). I still have no idea what her name is. But I know she's a cat. That's progress right?

But anyway. This is me. My name is Caitlin, but most of my friends call me Cat (for a good reason apparently). I'm 22 years old, goin' on 23 in April. I'm an animal science student in college. I'm still figuring myself out, and enjoying it every step of the way. If you'd like to know more about me, feel free to shoot me a note and we'll talk. Hoping to make new friends and get to know more people.

See you around. :)

-Cat-