28th birthday... which means it has been 28 years so far that I haven't killed myself in my chronic depression that has quite honestly gotten bad at times.

Quite honestly its been deprived from me and I been feeling needy about it recently. Since people don't care to ask anymore in general to me, I may as put this out here that I'm gonna be looking for some doing purposes. Don't care what kind.

No help so far except from one individual and another that cant even though he's trying his best for me. Lemme put it to you guys like this. My money is getting sapped by expenses. 450 a month for rent and the bills for the place so I can live under. this paycheck is getting sapped because 80 has to go to my dog for her rabies shot, another 20-50 for her to get trimmed and filed down so she can look and feel better for herself. Food expenses and gas coupled with the fact that I can't locate a second job due to my living area. Dunkin Donuts is literally my only income right now until I can somehow get money for a car. That alone, will cost me around 5000+, not to mention that because this now infected tooth needs a root canal so it can be saved and a crown (because I don't feel like having any of my teeth pulled unless its a absolute last resort), that's another 2600 that I would need. I did get some anti-biotic from a dentist when going in for just a xray and I got declined by their insurance referral due to insufficient credit data due to not having a actual credit card. My only cards I ever got, are directly linked to my bank account as I have yet to have a need of something like that in my life. So in total, just to get my life started off once again in this new area after getting kicked out basically by my previous living arrangement, I would need at least 7-8 grand in total. Guys I really need help. This is not something I can do on my own at all. This stress, coupled with the infection that's going to start affecting me because I can't get dental at my full time job, is really going to kill me if it gets any worse than it already is, even though it has only just started its infection in my gums.

Please, I beg of anyone willing to help. My paypal address will be below to send any money that you can give and I'm still willing to do story commissions. And if you can't help, just don't tell me. I rather not deal with having to hear that when it could only make my attitude worse that for some personal reason or legit reason, someone can't help me. I just need help guys. Otherwise I'm gonna have to resort to going on a fundraising site to help me get the money I need and I don't wanna do that. I rather just ask my community that I've been involved with for over 10 years, for some help.

Paypal address: thatdragon[at]hotmail.com

*sighs* And once again I'm back to asking for help. The problem now is I need money to help start getting me ready for payments into having a dentist either do a root canal to possibly save my tooth, or have to pull it out altogether. It's now gotten rotten that it's hit the nerve. I say this with experience because this has happened before in the past and is now doing it to another tooth. I need to somehow make sure I can pay for it while at the same time able to afford food, gas and rent still. My next paycheck will not come until this coming Friday and that's too far along the road for me to wait while dealing with this pain. The Advil I just took has only dulled the pain for a hour and is now kicking back to hurting again. I am literally going to a dentist tomorrow to see if they can help me at all in dealing with this and can be able to make payments in the form of monthly bills with them. I need help in this because I don't have the funds at all. My paychecks are literally getting saved towards this being dealt with and also trying desperately in getting a car for myself while in this area I'm living in so it's not like I'm spending it on useless shit. I'm literally broke now in having to just deal with the huge bill of the impending dentist bill I'm gonna have to deal with and while also trying to get myself a car, that's almost an impossibility in getting that until the end of the year and I severely can't do that due to if that happens, my room mate will not be able to take me to work anymore and I have to resort to paying 20 bucks a ride from his mother, just to get to and from work. He has another car that has no title or insurance but his father will not let that car be used unless it is bought in full. Please guys, I need help and while this job is paying me a very decent amount every 2 weeks, it seems it's not going to be enough anymore.

Edit: And also, no. My full time job does not have dental benefits. Only medical. While that is nice, it does not solve the problem.

In specific, one you guys know that can do good furry rave style art. I ain't looking to spend well over a few hundred bucks for one but I do need another to go in junction with what I got years ago.

Okies. So, to start off, the job has been... a bit stressful in them wanting as much hours from me as possible it seems as I keep getting calls almost on a daily basis to go in earlier than scheduled each day. The money is a lot better though in all aspects as I'm making a pretty decent amount considering this to be a fast food job. Only downside to it, I won't be seeing any of the majority of it due to being backed up on rent because of the month period (They tell me 2 months but I just roll with it) that I couldn't pay so it will only start to become saved money when I actually start saving around... May. March and April, each paycheck -almost all of it- goes to paying for rent and bills. The slight upside is I got money again from doing taxes with HR block. Not much, but still its something when I actually get it by hopefully sometime next week or the end of this week.

Although it was stressful, I still have to urge the issue of money. I still need it guys. I'm still willing to do STORY commissions. I've gotten several talks about art and I'm sorry, I can't draw. Not unless I go to school to learn that or keep practicing and my time for that is... taken up for the most part with this job. Donate, Commission, hell I"m even still willing to do those erotic videos for money that I talked about. I just need help guys until this all gets finally settled and into place that I can be able to afford a damn car for myself to get around more easily.

That being said, Working at Dunkin' Donuts.... probably one of the slowest business' I've worked at. At least this one. Minimum wage while still full time even though I was told I would get a raise sometime to 9/hr but can't really say when that happens. I've been on my phone most times and that gives me more time to talk than being distracted with say a game or just youtube videos. So those who wish to get back in contact with me, please do so. I'm willing to chat, rp, whatever. Even get back in contact with those who wish to talk with me again. Boring at work most times and since management is very leniant on the phone wise (so long as you do your job) so it gives me ample time to catch up with furries/people and get to know better with others or just hook up again and catch up.

Been getting some help with a certain cat of mine and its been thankful that he has been. Otherwise I think I probably would've sunk by now.

Lastly, just a bit of a shout-out to some individuals that actually have been helping me.

Light the Lucario: Mostly at least trying to speak with me and chat up or rp. It's still always lovely to be with someone you known for so long.

Rytokii: Has been trying to help as well in forms of getting my ass out of the gutter of being depressed and it has helped me out. Thanks man.

Soren: TOO FREAKEN FAT AND YOU NEED MORE! ... also.... LEGEND OF ZELD IS TECHNO SAVVY. 'nuff said.

My yeeny Dahkari: Always want more from you. Mine.

The list can go on but it's late and I'm tired. Those I missed, don't be sad. I love you all for trying to be in my life and still value you all. Those who left and have gone away via deleting me, all I gotta say is this.

LATER HATERS! Not really but still, if I couldn't please you then I guess there isn't anything else I can do for you to come back at this point. I'm more than willing to talk with ya again if you want as my attitude has slightly improved since back then so hit me up if you want or not. Either way, the choice is yours. *noms a fridge and snugs into bed* Night time. I'll give another update probably in a week or so but know I'm still alive and kicking. Just trying to find ways to kill time is all while at work. Seeyas!

Most of you may not care as since in the past journals I've stated I need money and no one even bothered to respond. Well you people will be happy to know I have a job now but that still doesn't help my situation when I still don't have any money to even pay for gas now to get to work. So will you all please just help where you can, be it spreading around or actually helping me 'cause this is starting to hurt me more. And it doesn't help even more so that I lost my food stamps from RI this month and can't apply for another from NJ until next week which also means now I can barely afford any meat when all I can pay for now is barely even ramen. Help me out guys. If wanna commission a story then that's fine to, but I need the money dammit. I can't do much else about this.

Well after some searching I finally got another job to replace the hated one I had earlier. Went from being a Burger King employee to serving donuts and coffee at Dunkin' Donuts. I start Monday for training for a good 5 hours, train for 3 days and most likely this may become a full time job as the manager there seems to want to promote employees to such a thing as soon as possible. I do get benefits of health, though no dental still. (Why is it every place I work at offers no dental?) So it's still a upside to what I been getting with... most jobs I think. Only one other job I believe ever gave me benefits of something. So hopefully money will start coming in and I can get back on track with bills being paid and maybe soon a car can be purchased and maintined for my own needs but, one step at a time I suppose.

If you haven't seen his video of it, please... go check it out to save yourself monies from games that don't deserve to be bought. http://angryjoeshow.com/2015/01/top.....games-of-2014/

With that said... My own comments to them all in order of their listings on his games in number order.

10. Wasn't worth it to begin with when I first saw it. Plus the fact it was made by the same developers who made 2013's abomination of a game for that entire year, was just asking to be doomed from the start.

9. After Risen 2, I had hoped to see something make the game worth it more than that. Guess not.

8. Yeeeah... move license games. What do you expect?

7. Why does that even exist when it does nothing for the original games plot or lore from the ps3?

6. Didn't know they made a sequel to that, but now that I saw the video, Kinda glad I never knew about.

5.Cash Grab. What else can it be?

4.A broken, poor excuse of a game for a cash grab.

3.On rail Shooter.... yeah I ain't touching those.

2. How this developer even makes any money now.... he's just laughable at this point and not worth the time.

1. Ooooookay... I posted a video on youtube about them and now... I have to say I'm actually happy about this. Their game... Their abomination... is the worst fucking game I have ever seen besides RtH:R. Quite frankly, they need to just fucking stop before they bury themself in a pile of shit but hey, with their show possibly still going on, that may not be the case. Far as I'm aware of, They can just burn in hell and if I have end up hell as well due to their thinking, well... I'll be waiting for them then cause its nice and cozy in hell for me. For them.... probably not so much.

I'm fucking done with life and not even getting a rp from even my so called 'friends' is not doing anything to help with that so if you wanna do anything with me, let me know.

Another... what? 7? 10 contacts? I had to delete off of skype simply because I got deleted once again. It's at this point, why do I even fucking try anymore, even though I haven't really in the first place. Honestly I'm just waiting for everyone to just up and fucking leave me now since it seems I am just a fucking tool to be used and thrown away, just like I thought I always was.

To me honestly.... its what a horror game should've been maybe... a couple years ago honestly. To me I just don't see its appeal as much as others since all it's only about is jump scares. Yeah it gets the jump on you when you don't pay attention well enough, but really it's kinda like Dead Space to me. Once you seen the jump scares, it's hard to get scared again. Maybe a little jumpy, but that's it. It's not a bad game at all. It's at least better than some of the horror games we been getting on actual consoles or the like. Just... I wish a little more scares or the like was put into it to make it more memorable is all.

I finally got the pants needed for the job so I will be starting my new job on Monday from hence forth. The internet has been getting a little wonky and possibly the reason why my streaming has been somewhat down as of late. Trying to resolve that issue but probably won't be able to do much. My money is still a bit in the red but with the money coming in, that should go away in time. I will be getting a new cellphone and a car with the money I'll be getting so I can drive myself and have my own things to do without asking for the car. Other than that, if anybody wants to talk. Let me know. Just don't expect me to talk during work from now on as this job is more strict about its protocols than my last one so I have to be careful on that part.

Yep. Have the 3ds style of it so if anyone wants to add me and play, lemme know in the comments below with your friend code.

My friend code is: 4398-8743-0192

WEll ever since moving out and away from the three furs I was living under because one couldn't handle stress with living with roomates (which by the way is only gonna add stress because of making sure of other priorities besides your own) and went and turned in a 60 day notice without notifying me but had to get someone else to tell me, basically has landed me where I am now. A fur that  marxeen had found has put me up at his place for the time being and I don't know how long I will be staying under his roof. So for now, lets get the basics out of the way.

1. I'm now living in Tuckahoe/Woodbine NJ.
2. With barely any jobs I can apply at around this place and with no car, I'm strictly limited on trying to get a job in order to afford buying a car. (I'll get to helping me out in a little bit)
3. While still being out and on my own is kinda nice, I'm now starting to regret not taking up my mom or dads offer to just going back home, even though it would be kinda cramped and I would be limited on getting online. Though as the days progress, at the very least,  marxeen has made it somewhat tolerable to living here and kinda fun.
4. I know the cat has told me one before and I want to re-iterate something to all of FA because I said it before. DON'T ASSUME I'M MATED! Unless you either see it on my FA page or I tell you myself, IT AIN'T TRUE. I'm still focused on getting my life in order with getting a job so I can make money and pay bills. So trying to focus on one hellish life style that I don't know if my emotions or my mind in general can stand taking it already, having to deal with a mate as well would probably stretch very thin on my mental sanity, even if he does make sleeping with him kinda nice to have someone near me like that. Hence why I still haven't told him yet whether I'm in love with him or not because quite frankly, in my mind, I'm all over the place and trying to relieve as much stress as I can with my own things and RPing is enough for me right now as I'm trying to focus on getting a job. SO QUIT WITH THE RUMOR SPREADING YA FUCKERS!

*rubs his head and drinks some coo-lade* Ah, much better. Now while it seems my livestream on twitch is having some minor problems staying connected when I try to livestream, I believe its mostly because of the internet provider that I'm currently stuck with and because the distance in which my computer is away from the wireless modem so I have to maybe get it fixed or move out before it does.

Make no mistake, I do like spending time with someone and I rather it be someone I know more like  marxeen than the one I'm living with. As I said, he makes living here at least tolerable and I do thank him for that.

Last but not least, the commissions for stories. I'm gonna do a redo on the journal for commissioning me a story because one, I feel it can get better results and two, because I need something to fucking do besides just playing games and watching youtube or anime. Now keep in mind, I'm doing one story as a freebie and even if I get just even one person asking, its a good enough start. But if more than one asks for it, then I'll do a RDG for the lucky fur/scalie/bug who wants it.

All in all, I'd have to say ever since rooming in with the other two furs in RI kinda did screw me over because one acted like a child at the end, I will admit it was fun while it lasted. Dunno if those two will want to keep talking with me as I've yet to hear from them ever since the move, but who knows.

Well I need to get some stories out as having no job for now is really hurting me at the moment and I need to eat so what I intend to do is this: My past stories are a bit old and I'm a bit rusty. I plan on doing a story for everyone but here's the catch, I plan on putting One fur into the story as a sort of test style for me. What I will do is this: if only one fur wants to join, he/she will get the sole benefit of being in the story. If more than one does so, I will do a random number generator and respond to each comment what you want your number to be. I ain't well known and I know this probably won't go well, but bear in mind that the type of stories I will be doing is between muscle, pregnancy and weight gain to something about inflation, romantic and sexual scenes for stories. I will do my best for anyone wanting one and hope this pans out well. I just gotta make some money is all until I can find a job after the move I did from RI. And don't worry, a update on my life will come a little later. For now, I need to focus on making money so its stories for now.

At least to my perspective. No i won't post that freaken thing on my front page because it's actually worth it more to ask and talk to me, rather than just look at someones page and go 'hm maybe he'd like to rp something real quick'. I find that dumb really but it's what everyone else does so I ain't harping on them. Anyways, point of the matter, it just vanished with me. Not one person actually has the idea to ask that, if they wanted to, see if I wanted to rp. What's the worst I can say? If it's a no, then you can say you tried and maybe come back later and ask again if I'm willing to then. It ain't the end of the world.

I've been so bored these days because I can't go anywhere or do anything that I just sit in my room playing Smite, which I'm almost to League capability now thanks to all the damn gameplay I've been doing. More than I can say for LoL but, that's a different game. As for the stuff going on, a new car was gotten for now so while I'm in the hole for paying off my half for the car, really ABSOLUTELY nothing has happened that I consider new. People still rarely talk to me, even the close ones who consider me as a friend or other titles. I can get to work easier with the new car but that ain't new, that was just something that needed to happen no matter what. I've done little to nothing about my weight because not a damn single person cares enough to help me gain more so as I said stated before, I've kinda given up on it but I guess some small hope resides in me that someone may actually want to, but I doubt that. I've gone into heat I guess because lately with how much I've been around the three furries in this apartment and seeing more art online, I've been getting more... active I guess in my private need that since I won't ask those 3 for help, am pretty much screwed to getting anything of the like to help ebb this off.

Bottom line, I play Smite too damn much, I've still got a slight hope for gaining weight but since no one cares to help with that, I won't even bother asking and I'm in heat I guess but with little to no rp now I just tend to myself in my room by myself. Ain't my life grand?

.....

I loathe the fact on how I took it this far in life. Starting to consider if moving back to oklahoma is a better option.

After what I just went through, I'm gonna be back in my depressive demeanor online throughout the coming days now. It seems no matter what, I end up fucking up something in the end. I wrecked and totaled a roomates car and now because of this I will no longer have any money to do anything once again. So I've pretty much given up on a few things. My happiness for starters, my will to keep going in hopes I find a compatible mate, my dream of being fatter and just the simple fact I can't make anyone else happy. So I think once I get the roomates new car, I'm gonna give up completely on life and just quit trying to live for myself and just be someone elses bitch in life. Even if that means I get abused, at least it'll mean the others happiness.

Update: I've just added on my FA page when I gave up. I know no one cares about me and I'm worth shit, but figured ya'll wanted a update.

There we go peeps. All said and done so take a look and speak your mind if you want. Can't do much else other than that so I'm pretty much done and going to relax today and the next 3 days. THREE DAY OFF FROM WORK WOOOOOOOOOOOOOO! *wobbles to the fridge and noms food* Oh and I'll be bore as well so bug me if you want.

It keeps appearing that I'm getting deleted on skype for either the usual reason I know of or just deleted in silence. If I'm not fucking worth the effort anymore, just tell me. At least then you can actually tell me so whether I should try anymore or just leave you be, I will know, because I really am starting to become a ghost again now with no friends at all.

So In summation now, I'm just gonna go through my skype list now and ask you all if you even wanna keep me on your list cause now I just get the feeling ya'll just don't fucking care about me.

Like Ive told myself before in the past, its my fault only for doing the shit I have done. I don't ask for help because while yes I do act childish, everyone expects me to Man up and take on the shit thats given to me on my own as well. When you get to be like how i have grown up, anyone Else in a regular environment would just see me as stupid and whiny. Honestly they would be right but really when being told whats suppose to be done in a new environment, I tend to take things literal. No its not anyone elses fault but my own that Ive gotten this far and this bad in my... Stupidity. The three in this apartment are being apologized publicly because yes I am a dipshit for letting this get too far. Dont blame them. Just blame me for the shit I have stirred up and if you want to, fucking criticize me in public for all I care. Its honestly what I get and deserve since this was done.

So without stalling any longer, to the 3 in my apartment, I apologize for acting like I am which is... Well a utter jackass and piece of shit for lieing.

Lets talk about Metal Gear solid for a second. In its PlayStation years, the game was the next big thing to create its own sub-genre. It's story, if you could follow it depending on your age when you played it, was unique at the time and not many had been seen like it when it tried to place itself in a sort of 'real' world deal with us. It described its good side and bad side of characters good and evil. It's control scheme was perfect so you could have total control over Snake, making you feel as if you are him and able to do the things he can do. Even though it can be a FPS in a third person or first person view, it's way of handling combat was mixed up for variety purposes and gave a sense of challenge. Even with bosses as big as Vulcan Raven with his gatling gun with unlimited ammo made you have to use other weapons in order to take him down was unique. And with a final boss fight of Metal Gear and the one controlling him, tested your skills and yet at the same time, made you feel as if you're outclassed.

By far, Metal Gear Solid was perfect in its way of telling its story and its characters while delivering a new game play that was solid and its combat system, while done before, gave a unique approach to it at its time.

....

MORE THAN I CAN SAY FOR TWIN SNAKES!!!!

*flops on ground hard*

Oh my god people. I can't stand by when this needs to be all said and done. And when even critic reviews give this damn game a 9? A 9!?!?!?!?!?!!!?!?!??

Okay, first off its characters. Some are kept the same like Solid and Liquid Snake and the Colonel. Others are so STUPIDLY replaced from its original it's a wonder WHY? Dr. Naomi Hunter was replaced with a voice actor who doesn't give a damn. Plain and simple. Plus her voice sounds off when trying to sound like her. Mei Ling. THE WORST THING YOU COULD'VE DONE WAS GIVE HER A PLAIN ENGLISH ACTRESS! And yet... they did. Her voice sounds SO FAR OFF and SO DUMBED DOWN that it made me cringe -CRINGE- when I first heard her spoke up. I thought it was a joke at first but when I kept using the Save feature that she's there for, I realized it was a reality. They changed her voice to be so bland and forgettable that it's a wonder why they did. Ninja/Grey Fox. While I did like his voice still while in that suit from outside the codec, its a WHOOOOOOLE different story when he contacts you by codec. He sounds plain, unoriginal and not giving a damn... sound.. FUCKING.. FAMILIAR!!? *grabs Naomi and then shoves her aside to hear glass break* Master. While his voice sounds kinda the same, maybe even done by the same voice actor, I could still tell that there was a slight change in his voice. But still, JUST LIKE NAOMI, HIS DIALOGUE HE GIVES MAKES HIM SOUND LIKE HE DON'T GIVE A DAMN! *flails about and lays on the floor still* You see where I'm going with this? It seems that most characters voices that had been replaced from the original, makes up the faults for itself. And even Solid Snake can't fix that alone.

*sighs* And thus we come to... *shudders* its cut-scenes. The original had cut-scenes as well and it was flowed through its game at a good pace. Some parts felt a little shoved in the face style, but it was never all the time... MORE THAN I CAN SAY ABOUT TWIN SNAKES!! It's cut-scenes... OH MY GOD ITS CUT-SCENES!! Half of them ARE NOT NEEDED! For examples; when I crawled over the grating when I was in the air duct trying to find the Darpa Chief, I turn left and BAM! A unneeded cut-scene of a guy TAKING A PISS, SAYING HE HATES ALASKA AND GIVING THE BODY TYPE FOR MERYL! Is that reaaaaally vitally important to know about Nintendo/Metal Gear makers? Cause in the original, You didn't have to see that! You could just easily crawl across the grating and get the ammo that's on the other side and go back WITHOUT having to watch that. And even then I think in the original it doesn't even go into a cut-scene. It just lets you look so you'd have only yourself to blame if you wanted to watch the guy take a piss and say those things. Still don't believe me? Lets try another. After you had 'saved' the President of Armstech Kenneth Baker (Which by the way if Ocelot had 'broken' his arm, then why does it look like there's no arm at all?) and you do all the stuff to get back to the first floor and get Meryl's codec number, your introduced to what I like to call 'The alarm chamber for gas' where you have to bypass the security and get to the other side. Two ways you can do this. You can either use the thermal goggles or the cigarettes. Now unfortunately due to the game's downloaded material from Vimm (Which by the way is a great place to get and play old games from the past), the game on my end was fucking up with its programming for the Thermal and Night vision goggles and would show either just a black screen for the Night vision or a Blue screen for the Thermal. The other way though is that you can use the cigarettes as I said so I was fine with this. I fucked up on the first try going through because I calculated wrong on how far separated I was from the second to the last beam and thus, tripped the alarm. *sighs* In the original it just went through its trap section in-game wise and trapped you with no way out. The twin snakes version? A FUCKING UNNEEDED CUT-SCENE! For new comers to the game, THAT'S JUST A WASTE OF TIME! And to the old schoolers who know how it works, SAME DEAL! You don't need a damn cut-scene to show that you fucked up when its clearly obvious that if you did, the result would be the same. Only in Twin Snakes, they make you feel your mistake. They make sure you knoooow your mistake... IN THE ORIGINAL IF YOU FUCKED UP YOU GET TRAPPED WITH DEADLY GAS AND SLOWLY DIE! NO CUT-SCENE NEEDED! Hell, even Meryl if you pick up the codec call before going in, specifically tells you what would happen should you trip the alarms. So the cut-scene, IS! NOT! NEEDED!

And I know what some of you people are going to say. 'But it's just a cut-scene so you can easily skip it over if you don't wanna see it or already know what happens'. Sure that's fine and all, but oooooh wait. If a new comer into the series were to do that, they would start complaining that they missed a cut-scene and wanted to go back since it could be vital to the stories plot. So for new comers, most likely you're gonna sit and wait for the cut-scene to go through when it could very well be a waste of fucking time. But how would you know? Being a newcomer, you don't know what's going to happen so you assume everything that happens in the game, is of vital importance. To Old schoolers, it's just a chore to have to skip some of the unneeded cut-scenes and even then, sometimes we're taken aback by the extra cut-scene that wasn't in the original so we get intrigued ourselves to what it could be. And most of the time, THEY'RE JUST A WASTE OF TIME!

And now we come to what I think is about as bad as you can get... it's controls... *sighs* Now to be frank, the controls are not 'as bad' as I thought they would be.The movement controls you can pick between the analog or the direction pad. They work fine. The left and right triggers hold the inventory and the weapons you collected and that's fine as well. Now they could've done a little better with this, even in the original it does the same thing as well, to have both the action button and OK button as one so it could help a little more with the game flow. That's a minor nitpick as it still feels fluent though to gamers.... But for old school gamers who played the original... it is a fucking INSULT!!! To take away one of the controls for BOTH, that's right, BOTH instant access buttons and just TOSS THEM OUT THE FUCKING WINDOW! I know what your going to say and yes, I agree with it. The buttons on the GameCube controllers have one less than the PlayStation controllers and they have to accommodate for it. But when you could have improved it slightly, SLIGHTLY, THEN YOU FUCKING TAKE THAT ROUTE! The Z button acts as the first person view when held and the X button is the action command..... you see my problem here? With no quick access button to what you previously held, you make the gameplay a bit more tedious in looking for the items or weapons that you want and have to select them. That's not fun half the time. Because in bringing up either menus, it pauses the game, thus making it not flow as well. It becomes a 'chore' in having to pause the game, select the weapon you want and/or select the item that you want as well before continuing. In the original, if you needed such things that you just held, you press the L1 or R1 buttons and you have quick and easy access, making the game play flow more smoothly. In the GC version? YOU DON'T HAVE THAT! What they could've done, was at the very least, make it so the Y button was the first person view when held, the X button to where you needed to crouch and the Z button to have AT LEAST the quick access button for the weapons. Thus giving the OK/Shoot/Action button A, a bit more reliability. While some of you may argue that might be putting too much stress on the controller function button, I say this. When it came to the playstation's era, THEY WERE ALREADY DOING THAT IN SOME GAMES! Soooo in your defense to the GC version, WHY CAN'T THEY DO THE SAME THING FOR THE GC VERSION? While Yes you still wouldn't have a quick access button for the Items side, but that would still be less of a hassle than say, getting both out like that.

Now just for some quick bits, yes I thought the facial features to say, Snake, felt as if they shouldn't have been added for the most part because in some instances, it made him look disfigured and unappealing. Some extra bits of say, Vulcan Ravens defeat in the tank with the grenade thrown up its main nozzle or Snake nodding to you when Psycho Mantis told you to lay your controller on the ground, was actually done well and kinda funny for Solid Snakes part. Others like Revolver Ocelots hand getting chopped off and having him look at it BEFORE it started to spew out blood or his LOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOONG winded introduction of him twirling his gun so many goddamn times was NOT NEEDED. Plus also, Snake acted WAAAAAAAAAY out of character when Kenneth Baker told Snake he forgot Meryl's codec number and he pulled his gun -HIS GUN- out and pointed it at the guy or how he grabbed Otacon and held him up -IN THE AIR MIND YOU-, as if trying to choke the information out of him. In the original Playstation version, NONE OF THAT SHIT HAPPENS. Yeah okay, Snake did grab Otacon but he didn't lift him up IN THE AIR. He just grabbed him and pulled him forward to make sure the point got across. That was it.

The music and everything seems to have been kept the same as I didn't notice it much and as for its new added things in the game, all I can say is... why? The hanging off the ledge was not needed in almost all the game I played so it seemed kinda pointless and while the added hiding in lockers did help a little, most times it was also not needed because in predicting some of the guards patterns, I could easily sneak by them without having to hide in a damn locker. Plus while having the Tranquilizer gun in the game is a fun idea, it makes the game WAAAAAAAY too easy to bypass it through once you get it. So really, I call that gun in this game a sort of 'cheat' gun if you will.

So really... what all did I like about the game of Twin Snakes? Well.... just the fact they tried to update the game and give it better graphics is about... all I can say for it. Other than that, there's really not much appeal to it for me when I have the Original Discs of the Metal Gear Solid game on hand in my room to play at anytime.

Honestly it's a game that while its good to play to get yourself started into the series to know whats going on, a bad choice to pick when you could easily play it on the PS3 and buy the game itself from EBay or just go to Vimm and help yourself to it as well. All in all, the reviews I seen of this game are just... wrong. Metacritics has given it a 8.9, IGN gave it a 9 and I think Gamespot also gave it a 9. To let this slip by me is... downright insulting to everyone. My opinion on this game compared to the original, is a 3. It's control scheme is bad, half of the cutscenes are not needed, it's voice acting is downright pitiful and even some of the boss fights in my opinion get a coat of 'easy paint' over it and it's improved graphics doesn't give it much of a plus when that's all it does right it seems. Plus its two features it takes from Metal Gear Solid 2: Sons of Liberty are not needed. It's just a bad game compared to the Playstation original as I give it a 9.

The license renewal thing has been mailed off so I'm just waiting on it now plus the food stamps apparently I got done as well without my ID needed but wanted. So in summation, I'm waiting on my drivers license to get done and come in the mail for me, I'm waiting for a piece of mail stating I'm approved to start using food stamps and now I'm stuck in the apartment alone with barely anything to do and just beating myself up both physically and mentally on the fact it's come to this point in my life I had to do such a thing with myself to get food stamps since I can't count on my paycheks anymore to pay for it all. I just feel so damn useless by this point, it's a wonder how I've stayed with these furs I'm with. I'm just waiting for them to tell me that I'm getting kicked out and need to leave ASAP honestly since they really don't help me in anyway and honestly 2 of them I think could care less about me it feels like.

And already got a slight interview on a job in the area that I'm typing this journal out right now. Never thought I'd go back into one of my most hated places on this earth; Starbucks. And if your wondering, it's because one bad experience ruined it for me really. I just don't trust them now. Anyway, on a different subject, yes I still am as bad as I was before because the constant stress still adding on my mind in the facts that anything can go wrong between now and the time I finally get moved in for real to the apartment I'm to be sharing with 3 others, has me still skeptical on how this all plans out in the process. Everybody keeps telling me it will work out and be alright, but honestly I'm still going to do it whether its said or not because its my thing. So if you want to blame anyone, blame me for inheriting this from my family of nutjobs. As for the other issue I have, I do plan on making a visit to a close friend sometime soon but because this move has drained more money than I thought it would, I'm having to get some things prioritized in order to accomodate the fact that money is still going to be my problem. I just hope I get this all done and over with so I can stop myself before I crash and burn hard.

In either case, yes I am not moved up to Rhode Island and what little friends I have, if anyone is in the near vicinity and wants to come see me, go for it. Otherwise, I just hope I can make maybe more friends soon and possibly some money coming to me in the process.

And yes to answer a question, it might seem already that I got a job in a city next to mine and since everything here is pretty close, I can hopefully work with that.

Least to me anyway. Seems its mostly been my fault that everyone has gone away from me in terms of roleplaying now and even f-list has gone away from me. At this point... I think my only means of help now is just stories and the pictures I usually find. The few that do wish to rp, I end up screwing over and rarely do anything and now it seems I'm even starting to get thrown in the null and void of being online. Not only do rarely I hear from even just my friends, but now even the close friends like my wing brother and furry father have pretty much gone silent and left me alone. At this point I'm starting to see I'm gonna be become a ghost again. A picture will come of it because of this happening but hey, what can I say. I'm the stupid dragon that made this happen so I'm gonna have to live with it now and start knowing I'm gonna fall into being alone again with barely anyone to talk to.