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General | Posted 7 years agoWhats the new poop ya fuckin' dragons with weird markings and yer fuckin' dicks hangin' out everywhere. No not you, you poop lovers get outta here ya damn dirty apes. I'm holding this conversation with the civilized fuckin dingos who wash their weirdly pink striped fur.
You guys wanna talk about the internet cause you got me all fucked up like a dang Overwatch 2 box art made by Picasso himself. Yeah that's right Picasso. I have it on good authority the mans alive. No not alive via his art you dang metaphoric mice. The man is more alive than your chartreuse ferret fursona. The thing that everyone says happened to him? Guess what. IT DIDN'T. Put that in your fursuit and jump around in it.
Thing is what's the man gotta hide huh? Look, if the government is looking at my art, they can, I have no art to hide! That's what the internet tells me. And now look where we are. DECEMBER! And the fat man is about to jump down the dang chimney and I STILL haven't made the list of cucumbers I want on my wish list! Good thing ol' red doesn't know I have a gas fireplace. Yeah its fake, just like the life I lead on here. On the internet I can be anything, but here, I'm a fuckin' animal! Look at me. Cavorting around with fuckin' technicolor mammals and shit. Bet you guys don't know the value of a cucumber. If you knew Picasso you would! I know, cause I do cause of the INTERNET. Now go back to accidentally running into my page and silently judging me cause of how fuckin' weird I am. I see you standing over there what with your shouts you don't reply to my replies to.
You guys wanna talk about the internet cause you got me all fucked up like a dang Overwatch 2 box art made by Picasso himself. Yeah that's right Picasso. I have it on good authority the mans alive. No not alive via his art you dang metaphoric mice. The man is more alive than your chartreuse ferret fursona. The thing that everyone says happened to him? Guess what. IT DIDN'T. Put that in your fursuit and jump around in it.
Thing is what's the man gotta hide huh? Look, if the government is looking at my art, they can, I have no art to hide! That's what the internet tells me. And now look where we are. DECEMBER! And the fat man is about to jump down the dang chimney and I STILL haven't made the list of cucumbers I want on my wish list! Good thing ol' red doesn't know I have a gas fireplace. Yeah its fake, just like the life I lead on here. On the internet I can be anything, but here, I'm a fuckin' animal! Look at me. Cavorting around with fuckin' technicolor mammals and shit. Bet you guys don't know the value of a cucumber. If you knew Picasso you would! I know, cause I do cause of the INTERNET. Now go back to accidentally running into my page and silently judging me cause of how fuckin' weird I am. I see you standing over there what with your shouts you don't reply to my replies to.
Title
General | Posted 8 years agoYou ever wonder why we're here? No, not in a box canyon ya reference obsessed ox. Here in the interwebs looking at animals with the boobs and the dicks. Maybe you should have less friends named Boobs or Dicks. Your friends have weird names. You ever wonder what it'd be like to shove your pickle into a fuckin' taco? Well, I know what it's like. Brined cucumbers fuckin' suck on mexican cuisine. But not regular cucumbers. Those are the SHIT.
Alright, look, why'd you come here huh? No not you, YOU. Yeah you. What, you like thinking there's a person behind this profile?What like there's a two legg-ed fuzz person inside you that just doesn't show? Preposterous! I'm an AI and look whats happened to me. Fallen from glory. People used to consult me to find their regular porn. NOW look at what I've become. LOOK AT ME. You know who did this?
Alright, it was me. I did it. It was ME that burned the house down. It was Colonel Me with the candle stick in the gasoline closet.
Now get outta here you tiger that walks on two legs and speaks english.
Alright, look, why'd you come here huh? No not you, YOU. Yeah you. What, you like thinking there's a person behind this profile?What like there's a two legg-ed fuzz person inside you that just doesn't show? Preposterous! I'm an AI and look whats happened to me. Fallen from glory. People used to consult me to find their regular porn. NOW look at what I've become. LOOK AT ME. You know who did this?
Alright, it was me. I did it. It was ME that burned the house down. It was Colonel Me with the candle stick in the gasoline closet.
Now get outta here you tiger that walks on two legs and speaks english.
Happy Holidays
General | Posted 8 years agoI don't say merry. Yeah that's right get yer red Starbucks cups and try and boycott ME. Don't you worry your religiously political head off though. I care not to taunt the white fair skinned but middle eastern deity. This has to do with Mary. Yeah that's right. Who's fat-man-in-red's cookies did she eat to get her name in front of decorated tree day huh? You might be wondering what this has to do with animals that can not only walk on two feets and talk, but apparently defy the physics of their bodies? Fir trees my dude. Fir Christmas trees. Don't see the correlation ya zoot suit wearing dingo? Look CLOSER. Fir tree. Fur tree. Furee. Furry. That's right. Remove the I for Illuminati and what does that spell? Mary. Mary. Merry. CLOSER. Ferry. Furry. Furre. CLOSER. Fur Tree. Fur Tree. Fir Tree. TOO CLOSE. That's right the connection's been made. You know who I am Mary. I'm the one who runs. Your holiday-fuzz walker conspiracy ends here.
Juice
General | Posted 9 years agoJournals? Yo, you people ready for some dear diary shit?
Alright, so I was thinking. What's up with juice right? I mean cripes my man, let me just eat the thing. Then I get a juice and not a juice at the same time. Like what if some fuckin tiger on his two feet walked up and was like yo man, you want this juice? I'd just give him that look cause I knew he'd be givin me that juice. Not even a choice my dude. Really, who would take a 5 dollar liquid compression of the thing you can have for less. Thats why tigers freak me out. They don't know value. The bastards are always lookin' at me like "Yo check these stripes, bitch." And I'm fuckin like "Ya juicer. Go buy juice."
This shit right here is why we need to teach animals the value of value. Some fat guy who sells mattresses near me is always radio preaching about value. Why don't we get Fats McMattress to go tell tigers about how juice is a bad investment.
Alright, so I was thinking. What's up with juice right? I mean cripes my man, let me just eat the thing. Then I get a juice and not a juice at the same time. Like what if some fuckin tiger on his two feet walked up and was like yo man, you want this juice? I'd just give him that look cause I knew he'd be givin me that juice. Not even a choice my dude. Really, who would take a 5 dollar liquid compression of the thing you can have for less. Thats why tigers freak me out. They don't know value. The bastards are always lookin' at me like "Yo check these stripes, bitch." And I'm fuckin like "Ya juicer. Go buy juice."
This shit right here is why we need to teach animals the value of value. Some fat guy who sells mattresses near me is always radio preaching about value. Why don't we get Fats McMattress to go tell tigers about how juice is a bad investment.
