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Sometimes life really sucks!
General | Posted 15 years agoI am such a fucking idiot!
Ok, for those that don't know me and the recent events that have transpired, I have met a dragon and become very close to him, he is also aware that I have a non-furry partner I am with. The other weekend, after a evening with the dragon, my partner, him and I all went out to lunch and things appeared to go well.
This is where I made my mistake. <slaps hand> And a big fucking one I made too! Now, my partner's jealousy has come to the surface and all that's directed towards me is sarcasm and snarkyness.
I am at a loss of what to do. If I stop seeing the dragon, I fear I may hurt him and myself as collateral damage. But I am a victim of circumstance and that I am unable to move out as I am currently financially unstable. In addition, I also have my consulting company established here, as well as going to school, to which I only have a year to go till I get my degree.
This is really upsetting me and I am almost to my breaking point. All I want to do is just run away and get away from everyone.
Ok, for those that don't know me and the recent events that have transpired, I have met a dragon and become very close to him, he is also aware that I have a non-furry partner I am with. The other weekend, after a evening with the dragon, my partner, him and I all went out to lunch and things appeared to go well.
This is where I made my mistake. <slaps hand> And a big fucking one I made too! Now, my partner's jealousy has come to the surface and all that's directed towards me is sarcasm and snarkyness.
I am at a loss of what to do. If I stop seeing the dragon, I fear I may hurt him and myself as collateral damage. But I am a victim of circumstance and that I am unable to move out as I am currently financially unstable. In addition, I also have my consulting company established here, as well as going to school, to which I only have a year to go till I get my degree.
This is really upsetting me and I am almost to my breaking point. All I want to do is just run away and get away from everyone.
Notes on Opening Pandora's Box
General | Posted 15 years agoHey all!
I have officially pulled the story off the site, as I am in the process of fully rewriting and editing it. I am somewhat of a perfectionist and am getting back into character development, an aspect of fiction I really need to work on.
Will repost once I get the changes made.
I have officially pulled the story off the site, as I am in the process of fully rewriting and editing it. I am somewhat of a perfectionist and am getting back into character development, an aspect of fiction I really need to work on.
Will repost once I get the changes made.
Musings
General | Posted 15 years agoWell all, at least this year ended on a high note. After coming out as a furry (was already out of the real life closet) and being introduced by a longtime friend (you know who you are!!!), have met a furry I really like and cherish.
Not naming names, but if you are reading this, you know who you are. It's amazing the feelings I have. The first time we met, I was taken by him. The rest of the night we chatted and talked and just being around him made me feel electric.
The story, Opening Pandora's Box is dedicated to him and some of the emotions in the story are how I feel and I hope he knows that. Can't wait for the next time to be with him.
Not naming names, but if you are reading this, you know who you are. It's amazing the feelings I have. The first time we met, I was taken by him. The rest of the night we chatted and talked and just being around him made me feel electric.
The story, Opening Pandora's Box is dedicated to him and some of the emotions in the story are how I feel and I hope he knows that. Can't wait for the next time to be with him.
Further Opening Pandora's Box
General | Posted 15 years agoBad Rogal ! <slaps paw>
Well my furry friends, I jumped the gun this time and I apologize. I uploaded the first chapter of Opening Pandora's Box and it was not fully formed.
I reuploaded after adding a little more detail to it. What can I say, I'm a perfectionist. I just also uploaded Chapter 2 which I finished at about 1230 this morning. Things really heat up in this chapter.
Chapter 3 will show how far things go. It will contain graphic themes of sexual relations. You have been warned.
As always, please read and comment! Flames will be ignored. Also, if you are a artist in the DC area, I would like some images of me drawn as the two characters.
Well my furry friends, I jumped the gun this time and I apologize. I uploaded the first chapter of Opening Pandora's Box and it was not fully formed.
I reuploaded after adding a little more detail to it. What can I say, I'm a perfectionist. I just also uploaded Chapter 2 which I finished at about 1230 this morning. Things really heat up in this chapter.
Chapter 3 will show how far things go. It will contain graphic themes of sexual relations. You have been warned.
As always, please read and comment! Flames will be ignored. Also, if you are a artist in the DC area, I would like some images of me drawn as the two characters.
Opening Pandora's Box
General | Posted 15 years agoThe last few weeks have been a nightmare. This past Friday, I may have developed an allergy to shellfish, which landed me in the local ER for about 4 hours.
The following 2 days, I performed Mozart's Requiem with my local community choir and the local symphony orchestra.
I have been working so hard lately, I barely have time for myself, let alone a paw once in a while.
Only once in my lifetime, I have let my guard down completely to another person, and it was very freeing. I am trying to do it again, as I feel it is the right time to do so. From that desire, this story sprang forth. I hope someday I can actually do what in the pages that follow are how I feel.
The story is called Opening Pandora's Box. Please read the first chapter and let me know what you think.
The following 2 days, I performed Mozart's Requiem with my local community choir and the local symphony orchestra.
I have been working so hard lately, I barely have time for myself, let alone a paw once in a while.
Only once in my lifetime, I have let my guard down completely to another person, and it was very freeing. I am trying to do it again, as I feel it is the right time to do so. From that desire, this story sprang forth. I hope someday I can actually do what in the pages that follow are how I feel.
The story is called Opening Pandora's Box. Please read the first chapter and let me know what you think.
Oh what a strange magic
General | Posted 15 years agoTitle above taken from ELO's Strange Magic
Well, talk about trial by fire. A few weeks ago at my first "fur meet", I finally discovered my inner fur and am much happier about it. A long-time friend invited me and I met several of his friends, one of whom, I have become good friends. What is amazing about my new friend is the energy I feel coming off him.
It's something magical that awakens the deep rooted pure animal inside me. On one hand, it scares the hell out of me. For many years, I have sought to control those feelings. Contained in that "jar" was not only my sexual urges but my anger as well. Once my anger got out, it scared me and sometimes those around me. On the other hand, it positively amazing. Not in a drug induced type of thing, but just the rush of energy that comes with it.
My question to you is:
Has there ever been a time in your life that you were just blown away by someone?
Well, talk about trial by fire. A few weeks ago at my first "fur meet", I finally discovered my inner fur and am much happier about it. A long-time friend invited me and I met several of his friends, one of whom, I have become good friends. What is amazing about my new friend is the energy I feel coming off him.
It's something magical that awakens the deep rooted pure animal inside me. On one hand, it scares the hell out of me. For many years, I have sought to control those feelings. Contained in that "jar" was not only my sexual urges but my anger as well. Once my anger got out, it scared me and sometimes those around me. On the other hand, it positively amazing. Not in a drug induced type of thing, but just the rush of energy that comes with it.
My question to you is:
Has there ever been a time in your life that you were just blown away by someone?
Story of a Fur
General | Posted 15 years agoThe journey started many years ago, back when I was a...well, to be honest, I wasn't really sure. All in the real world knew me as Jason. In my dreams, that was another story. In the pages, I was a dragon, well two to be exact. (For those that are interested in Tenebrous, I hate to disappoint, but the manuscript no longer exists. I lost 1/4 of it when I moved to where I am now, and I killed the remaining portions shortly thereafter due to both interpersonal issues and my lack of focus on the story itself.)
Darkstar- About as tall as I am in real life. Darkstar was a dark blue anthro-dragon. His scales were iridescent with hints of black, depending on the light. Wearing a loose-fitting robe, Darkstar and his partner Ecopolis, ruled over Tenebrous, an alternate dimension they were pulled into after receiving their amulets.
Rogal- (The first half of my name) Rogal was the elder of the dragon-kind in Tenebrous. Rogal was wise beyond his years and advised Ecopolis and Darkstar on dealing with the battle of good and evil. Rogal was a gold colored dragon whose scales shined brilliant in the sunlight, almost blinding anyone who had the unfortunate chance of looking at him directly. Of course, being wise, usually means being alone in contemplation for long periods intertwined with brief visits. (I really empathized with this character more for a long while.)
Vorah- For those who are unfortunate to see me shift into anger, meet Vorah. Vorah I imagined is a crimson red anthro-dragon. He has a horrendous temper, and once set off, takes a major event to calm down. When meeting Vorah, it's best to walk away.
Corin- One of my alter-egos, is the form of a muscular white tiger. I used to collect tiger plushies when I was younger. Always loved the tiger. Considering the fact I grew up with cats, I'm not really surprised. Corin is described as my playful and angry nature.
Ursus One of the more recent additions to the sanitarium inside my head. Ursus evolved out of my recent health issues and interpersonal issues within my family. Ursus being a bear, is prone to ferocious outbursts when provoked. So far, those outbursts have been few and limited to just inside my family circle.
At the major height of my health issues, I had the great awakening. It was one dark evening in Mid-September when I had a near-death experience. On my way home from my new job, I blacked out behind the wheel of my car and woke up just in time to be hit head-on my another car turning left. I sustained several injuries (non-severe) and spent almost a full day in the hospital.
That incident left a lasting impression on me and provoked a major change, almost a combining of my alter egos. This combination, slowly with time, became Ursus, with Rogal being in the forefront, fighting the tide. This has given rise to the name you know now as Rogal Ursus.
If we meet in either the fandom, or in Real life, either one will do.
Darkstar- About as tall as I am in real life. Darkstar was a dark blue anthro-dragon. His scales were iridescent with hints of black, depending on the light. Wearing a loose-fitting robe, Darkstar and his partner Ecopolis, ruled over Tenebrous, an alternate dimension they were pulled into after receiving their amulets.
Rogal- (The first half of my name) Rogal was the elder of the dragon-kind in Tenebrous. Rogal was wise beyond his years and advised Ecopolis and Darkstar on dealing with the battle of good and evil. Rogal was a gold colored dragon whose scales shined brilliant in the sunlight, almost blinding anyone who had the unfortunate chance of looking at him directly. Of course, being wise, usually means being alone in contemplation for long periods intertwined with brief visits. (I really empathized with this character more for a long while.)
Vorah- For those who are unfortunate to see me shift into anger, meet Vorah. Vorah I imagined is a crimson red anthro-dragon. He has a horrendous temper, and once set off, takes a major event to calm down. When meeting Vorah, it's best to walk away.
Corin- One of my alter-egos, is the form of a muscular white tiger. I used to collect tiger plushies when I was younger. Always loved the tiger. Considering the fact I grew up with cats, I'm not really surprised. Corin is described as my playful and angry nature.
Ursus One of the more recent additions to the sanitarium inside my head. Ursus evolved out of my recent health issues and interpersonal issues within my family. Ursus being a bear, is prone to ferocious outbursts when provoked. So far, those outbursts have been few and limited to just inside my family circle.
At the major height of my health issues, I had the great awakening. It was one dark evening in Mid-September when I had a near-death experience. On my way home from my new job, I blacked out behind the wheel of my car and woke up just in time to be hit head-on my another car turning left. I sustained several injuries (non-severe) and spent almost a full day in the hospital.
That incident left a lasting impression on me and provoked a major change, almost a combining of my alter egos. This combination, slowly with time, became Ursus, with Rogal being in the forefront, fighting the tide. This has given rise to the name you know now as Rogal Ursus.
If we meet in either the fandom, or in Real life, either one will do.
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