FA+
Shop
Sometimes Dreams Make Me Cry
Posted 12 years agoand its not because they were scary or bad. Its because the friends I made in those dreams, the love I shared in them, its gone forever.
I dont mean having a dream about already being married to someone and just automaticially loving them at the start of it.
I'm taking about in the dream, you meet someone that you've never met before in that world, and when you talk to them, you slowly grow attached, just like you would in real life with a stranger that slowly becomes a friend.
They fluster you and embarrass you and you slowly grow to love them. and then bam. you wake up and they're gone.
Its just sad...
I dont mean having a dream about already being married to someone and just automaticially loving them at the start of it.
I'm taking about in the dream, you meet someone that you've never met before in that world, and when you talk to them, you slowly grow attached, just like you would in real life with a stranger that slowly becomes a friend.
They fluster you and embarrass you and you slowly grow to love them. and then bam. you wake up and they're gone.
Its just sad...
Happy birthday to me :3
Posted 12 years agowell not yet, but tomorrow I'll be 19~ I feel really old for some reason, like I'm still a kid but I'm really not anymore and sometimes I think about it and it freaks me out o: But yes, gonna be one year since I moved out, I've got no plans though xD
Also discovered I like 'wine coolers', they're delicious and dont taste like alcohol at all :D
Also discovered I like 'wine coolers', they're delicious and dont taste like alcohol at all :D
Fun facts
Posted 12 years ago1. when I feel ignored, I act like a cat and I will lay on whatever you are doing or keep nudging your hand and press under your arm until you pay attention to me.
2. Whenever something bad happens my typical response is "I dont want it D: " (that face helps show the way I say it)
3. I dont know if there is ever a time I don't talk to myself.
4. Me and my roomate share a room so I like to post the things she says in her sleep on facebook.
5. I am the biggest cock-block you'll ever meet.
6. My mother raised me on Silent Hill and creepy nursery rhymes she'd make up such as "spider crawling up your back" which is probably why I'm so morbid.
7. You have to be crazy to be my friend, its just something that happens.
8. If you order me to do something, odds are I'll do the opposite if I can just to spite you (which is why I cant hold down a job)
9. I'm a hypochondriac and afraid of fire and big planets and the dark and mirrors and dOLLS
10. I have a plush squid dangling from my rear-view mirror c:
2. Whenever something bad happens my typical response is "I dont want it D: " (that face helps show the way I say it)
3. I dont know if there is ever a time I don't talk to myself.
4. Me and my roomate share a room so I like to post the things she says in her sleep on facebook.
5. I am the biggest cock-block you'll ever meet.
6. My mother raised me on Silent Hill and creepy nursery rhymes she'd make up such as "spider crawling up your back" which is probably why I'm so morbid.
7. You have to be crazy to be my friend, its just something that happens.
8. If you order me to do something, odds are I'll do the opposite if I can just to spite you (which is why I cant hold down a job)
9. I'm a hypochondriac and afraid of fire and big planets and the dark and mirrors and dOLLS
10. I have a plush squid dangling from my rear-view mirror c:
Going to my fiances graduation today
Posted 12 years agoI'm so proud of him ^^ even after all his court stuff he still managed to get really good grades in online class, get a job, working on his liscence, and graduate! ^^ Things are falling into place so wonderfully~
I wont be here today though, so i'm sorry but the iron artist commissions i have will have to be put on hold for a while, I'll do them as soon as I return though, I promise!
I wont be here today though, so i'm sorry but the iron artist commissions i have will have to be put on hold for a while, I'll do them as soon as I return though, I promise!
This is why I shouldn't be on skype at 3AM C:
Posted 12 years agoYOU DONT HAVE A FURSONA >:C
[3:02:53 AM] Conner: I DO TOO. The white bunbun.
[3:03:09 AM] Princess Luna: LAME.
[3:03:19 AM] Conner: YOU'RE LAME.
[3:04:14 AM] Princess Luna: NO YOU.
[3:04:19 AM] Princess Luna: YOU DONT EVEN HAVE A PATTERN. YER BORING.
[3:04:21 AM] Conner: NO YOU.
[3:04:30 AM] Conner: I LIKE THE PURITY OF THE WHITE.
[3:04:39 AM] Conner: BUT MAYBE NOW I'LL RETHINK IT.
[3:04:39 AM] Princess Luna: THERE IS NOTHING PURE ABOUT YOU.
[3:04:41 AM] Princess Luna: WHORE.
[3:04:43 AM] Conner: XD
[3:02:53 AM] Conner: I DO TOO. The white bunbun.
[3:03:09 AM] Princess Luna: LAME.
[3:03:19 AM] Conner: YOU'RE LAME.
[3:04:14 AM] Princess Luna: NO YOU.
[3:04:19 AM] Princess Luna: YOU DONT EVEN HAVE A PATTERN. YER BORING.
[3:04:21 AM] Conner: NO YOU.
[3:04:30 AM] Conner: I LIKE THE PURITY OF THE WHITE.
[3:04:39 AM] Conner: BUT MAYBE NOW I'LL RETHINK IT.
[3:04:39 AM] Princess Luna: THERE IS NOTHING PURE ABOUT YOU.
[3:04:41 AM] Princess Luna: WHORE.
[3:04:43 AM] Conner: XD
Creepy Nightmare
Posted 12 years agoso yeah i'm going to leave this here before I forget the dream and I apologize in advance for subjecting you all to the insanity c:
It was me, my mother, my baby brother, and a 16 year old brother that I don't have in real life. I had had a child, but a terrible accident happened and she had died... it must have been horrid because all that was found of her was her little hand....
Anyways, we were looking for a new house to live in to move on with our lives (and the place we used to live, the townsfolk were calling my mom a witch and she could barely leave the house) so we eventually found this little house on the corner of a quiet neighborhood (this was a house I used to live in in RL) and we were setting everything in. Mom went off to a business trip for a few days, leaving me and my brother alone with the baby.
At first I didn't notice anything strange was going on. But my brothers room was in the basement and often he would hide himself away down there. Sometimes I would smell strange scents like something burning or hear nightmarish noises in the middle of the night, but he always returned back up to the first floor with a smile on his face and cooked breakfast, so I just pretended that I was imagining it.
One day he approached me. "I can bring her back, you know." I tensed up, furious at such a wretched thing to say.
"You cant bring back whats dead." I said softly under my breath, walking away briskly.
The thought ran around in my head as I tried to stiffle it down with a stiff drink. Tears fell down my cheeks as I began to remember my precious blond haired angel...
I was on the couch when he approached me again.
"I'm so close."
I glared at him, becoming intensely sour at his taunting.
"Get away from me," I hissed under my breath.
"Let me show you." He held out a small box with a lever attached to the top of it. He placed it on the floor, two white orbs shooting out of an opening in it under the couch. He pumped the lever a few times and there was a strange, gurgled sound from under me. I gasped and I leaned over to look, too afraid to lift up the skirt of the couch.
"I'm able to do this with her DNA... I'm so close, they live but they die so quickly..."
I gasped as an agonized, gurgled scream rang out, and two little hands pressed out against the skirt.
"aw.. the other ones head didn't form... damn..."
I couldn't take it. He was using the DNA from my childs hand to make these small, tiny creatures, and they were in so much pain... I stood up and ran upstairs, grabbing my little brother and running to my car. I didn't have the car seat in, so I strapped him in as best I could in the front seat and took off. I was drunk but it was no matter to me, I had to get him away from there. He wasn't safe...
As I was driving, however, a black armored vehicle haulted my path. I was going to collide with him, so i had to yank the stearing wheel over, and we crashed into a ditch. My vision went black for a moment and when i t returned my hand lunged out in search for my little brother. He was not there. I look out to see a man carrying him off, and despite my disoriantation I leap out of the car and snatch him out of the mans hand, freeing my car and driving off in the other direction.
I escaped, and I didn't come back for years. Finally, through moms imploring, I decided to go to a play and meet up with her there. We were watching the stage, and onto it a thin, small girl walked on. she began to dance, perfectly, long blond hair flowing around her as she did...
I dropped my juice, my breath caught in my throat. That girl is.... "Q-Quin..." I held out a hand as if to touch my lost child, eyes wide. This isn't possible. this is a dream.
I was told to wait by a soft smile from my mother, and I couldn't do much but comply, my mind was numb. After the play was done I rushed up behind the curtain and stared at the child. She smiled warmly up at me with that sweet smile I'd missed so dearly.
"So now you know." my mother walked up behind me, smiling softly. "Youre brother had the best intentions, but he was going about it wrong. He scared you away. I'm sorry for that." She was holding onto her own little baby that I had stolen away from her and I felt guilty. "I know its not Quin, but she's very close, she has all of Quin's memories... ever her spirit if you'll believe me. Please, accept her, and be happy."
I looked down at the small child who held her arms up to me. "mommy...?" I smiled and picked her up, noticing a long scar around the top of her scalp that matched mine. It had not been there on my real daughter...
I spun around to face my mother, eyes wide. She nodded. "You are a smart girl, I knew you'd notice that she has something in common with you.... You are the second of yourself."
So I'd been re-made too.....
It was me, my mother, my baby brother, and a 16 year old brother that I don't have in real life. I had had a child, but a terrible accident happened and she had died... it must have been horrid because all that was found of her was her little hand....
Anyways, we were looking for a new house to live in to move on with our lives (and the place we used to live, the townsfolk were calling my mom a witch and she could barely leave the house) so we eventually found this little house on the corner of a quiet neighborhood (this was a house I used to live in in RL) and we were setting everything in. Mom went off to a business trip for a few days, leaving me and my brother alone with the baby.
At first I didn't notice anything strange was going on. But my brothers room was in the basement and often he would hide himself away down there. Sometimes I would smell strange scents like something burning or hear nightmarish noises in the middle of the night, but he always returned back up to the first floor with a smile on his face and cooked breakfast, so I just pretended that I was imagining it.
One day he approached me. "I can bring her back, you know." I tensed up, furious at such a wretched thing to say.
"You cant bring back whats dead." I said softly under my breath, walking away briskly.
The thought ran around in my head as I tried to stiffle it down with a stiff drink. Tears fell down my cheeks as I began to remember my precious blond haired angel...
I was on the couch when he approached me again.
"I'm so close."
I glared at him, becoming intensely sour at his taunting.
"Get away from me," I hissed under my breath.
"Let me show you." He held out a small box with a lever attached to the top of it. He placed it on the floor, two white orbs shooting out of an opening in it under the couch. He pumped the lever a few times and there was a strange, gurgled sound from under me. I gasped and I leaned over to look, too afraid to lift up the skirt of the couch.
"I'm able to do this with her DNA... I'm so close, they live but they die so quickly..."
I gasped as an agonized, gurgled scream rang out, and two little hands pressed out against the skirt.
"aw.. the other ones head didn't form... damn..."
I couldn't take it. He was using the DNA from my childs hand to make these small, tiny creatures, and they were in so much pain... I stood up and ran upstairs, grabbing my little brother and running to my car. I didn't have the car seat in, so I strapped him in as best I could in the front seat and took off. I was drunk but it was no matter to me, I had to get him away from there. He wasn't safe...
As I was driving, however, a black armored vehicle haulted my path. I was going to collide with him, so i had to yank the stearing wheel over, and we crashed into a ditch. My vision went black for a moment and when i t returned my hand lunged out in search for my little brother. He was not there. I look out to see a man carrying him off, and despite my disoriantation I leap out of the car and snatch him out of the mans hand, freeing my car and driving off in the other direction.
I escaped, and I didn't come back for years. Finally, through moms imploring, I decided to go to a play and meet up with her there. We were watching the stage, and onto it a thin, small girl walked on. she began to dance, perfectly, long blond hair flowing around her as she did...
I dropped my juice, my breath caught in my throat. That girl is.... "Q-Quin..." I held out a hand as if to touch my lost child, eyes wide. This isn't possible. this is a dream.
I was told to wait by a soft smile from my mother, and I couldn't do much but comply, my mind was numb. After the play was done I rushed up behind the curtain and stared at the child. She smiled warmly up at me with that sweet smile I'd missed so dearly.
"So now you know." my mother walked up behind me, smiling softly. "Youre brother had the best intentions, but he was going about it wrong. He scared you away. I'm sorry for that." She was holding onto her own little baby that I had stolen away from her and I felt guilty. "I know its not Quin, but she's very close, she has all of Quin's memories... ever her spirit if you'll believe me. Please, accept her, and be happy."
I looked down at the small child who held her arms up to me. "mommy...?" I smiled and picked her up, noticing a long scar around the top of her scalp that matched mine. It had not been there on my real daughter...
I spun around to face my mother, eyes wide. She nodded. "You are a smart girl, I knew you'd notice that she has something in common with you.... You are the second of yourself."
So I'd been re-made too.....
125 journals skipped
