I don´t know how the next time will be. I´ll probably be less active than before for quite a while. I don´t know what to do, or how. Life never wa skeen on me.

So yea happy new Year to all.
I have my ups and downs. I´m not drawing as exessevely as before as most I do turns out to be sketches and random things.

if you want to see all the stuff I do and up to date, follow me on Instagram : Pencilogist
the really finished images and like any bigger project than just skethcing will be here sooner or later.

I did order a Cintiq now finally, I have to wait quite a while for it to arrive.

im very annoyed by my entire tiredness, I keep falling asleep when I draw. I can browse on my phone or watch art forever but as soon as I want to draw I fall asleep. I try hard. It is very dark most of the time of day and I feel depressive and discouraged on many levels.
I still do commissions and eventually Trades.

I look for some ACEO trades actually, but please, I want about the same quality art in return, somewhat on the same level ; ;

I know I post Journals so rarely anyways, so why not use it to feature a nice artist you should definately check out.
Not watching for very long yet, but glad I found her. The characters are really inspiring and the art is really cute <3

I think my favourite pieces of


 qutens <<

are these

my absolute favourite piece is this character design http://www.furaffinity.net/view/16709745/ to die for. I´d love to make a character with this color sheme in future.not to forget despire the characters design, I really love the drawings.

then this bab is really awesome as well http://www.furaffinity.net/view/17706932/ and the chibi-ish version is adorable.

and this anthro character sheet is fab http://www.furaffinity.net/view/16223764/ the anatomy looks so appealing and I like the thick lines along with how the fur tufts are drawn.

forgot to uptade the journal. i´m back home for a while now.
will be working with resin soon and making magnetic dressup paperdolls. such things

so i´ll be off for a little while, while I´m at  rikdik `s

Things are hard, and althrough everyhting went okay actually, It still was a nightmare. Now I have to deal just with other problems. Kidney congestion is one of the worst pains existing, I read and agree to that. But still the surgery was worse.

I´m mor eand more thinking I need a new pc, this one had it´s best times after 11+ years. I also would love a tablet with screen so digital drawing would be nicer. My intous3 also has done its job for about 10 years now.
Though, i can just afford a Pc but there would be nothing left for a tablet and also, I still try to get a fursuit for long already... sigh.
I eventually take a turn in animal psychology at home, better than doing nothing at all for such a long time, but it also costs a lot. Learning, no earning.
So..I guess I´ll better get better at drawing.

Thought I had more time. The new med needs a while to take effect, but yet nothing changed,it only got worse. I had an appointment for conversation with a chirurg last week, just in case. But in the end he said my condition is so bad we gonna do surgery in four weeks.. and then later he cut it to two weeks. Well if my condition doesn´t get even worse from now, i´ll be gone 21th and having the surgery 22th.
Damn scared.
If things go well I might go home 10 days later.
I´m not keen on living with my bowel coming out of my belly and a bag taped on me, where my poo will go. But it´s better than everything now.
I got pain,fever all the time, go to toilet countless times, various infections in my mouth and gum, inflamed knots on my skin, my joints hurt, skin under my feet hurts so much I get sick when walking. I´m weak, I´m starving.
I´m dealing with this illness for almost 5 years now, I´m through all possible meds.

I just hope everything will go well.

damnit i´ve just been there like a month ago, going through most tortouring checkups that can be done. One of those three times in one week..however that was so unnecessary, one´d been enough... well since the last med I tried didn´t do anyhting that bad things to me, I´m going back for whatever they want to do with me there.. the doctor is at the end of his knowledge. I found a new med which is released tomorrow, i want to try it! but he doesnt have any experience with it and doesnt want to give that to me (well how , its new..) i guess he just pulls himself out of the single responsibility. From our hospital i can then be lead further to another hospital with even more experience..an Uni clinic , but the leader is gone and this place is a mess now, so I wonder if its a good idea at all... its also over one hour from home, i´ll be alone mos tof the time. I hope its better than our hospital, the beds are torture already, I cannot sleep there, if i can I wake up with incredible pain. honestly, the floor is more confortable to sleep on than their beds. Also I have lost weight, even more. I cannot loose anymore but I cannot eat the rubbish at hospital either.. also if they want to do these checkups again, i can not again take laxatives and no eating for days again , I can´t lose more damn weight! I am truly frustrated... but also before getting such a heavy operation on my guts, missing an important part of the body.. i´d rather try the little rest of meds out that is over. even though feeling like a lab animal. it always takes time to see if something takes effect, and sadly I have made just acquaintance with the side effects. I can barely dare to go anywhere, I have so much pain and trouble eating.By other side effects, be it of th eillness itself or the meds, I have hurting knots on my legs and i can hardly walk at times since my ankles are swollen..which is not funny when trying to make it to toilet in time...and i get fever again and again..seeing dangerous side effects in the med I have to take against fever and pain too. In the end probably my immune system is gone completely.I haven´t seen love in weeks, because got a bit ill and its dangerous for me... and all stuff like this.. I barely feel like doing anything anymore, not even drawing. I cannot sleep any night through because i wake up almost every hour with pain and need to hurry to toilet.. and it will just not go away, never untill i found a med that helps, of the very limited available and i´m quite at the end.. the other option is a pretty live changing surgery as well in good as in the bad way..

this is nothing to call life anymore.

so i returned early because this place was just a mess where you´re pretty much left alone. even the doctor didnt like working there coughcough told to get my stuff and leave quickly ,its just a disaster. I could tell i want to go after getting my plan for the week.
well i feel better home anyways , and i can keep with my own eating time , since i need much time and have to eat several times a day in small portions in case i dont wanna lose the bit weight again i gained back over past months. i can´t even do that there. and they planned to make several check ups not even necessary, even my doctor kinda laughed at. just stressing me out, leaving me to myself. not helpful, rather opposite, since i got worse just in these few days.
My meds are playing hard on me again.. i´m always tired, i even fall asleep while sitting. I´m really dizzy, i´m in lack of Vit D and Iron, which both need to be given really careful as too much causes serious issues. a few vitamins the body just throws out again but others like A and D , if you get too much you can die. (thats what happens when you eat an ice bear, there´s so much vitA that its absolutely toxic for human body, people eating them will die)
my liver is inflamed again too so.. well I´m just feeling pretty shitty.

Because of my illness and shit we applied for rehab clinic, they didn´t have any free spots , so it took some months, now i got a writing sent that there is one reserved for me , starting at 13th February. oh how great i´m missing some stuff around that time. I ´m not sure how long I would be there...
I don´t even wanna go actually. it might be 3 weeks, and no internet. And I go mad anyways when I´m not at home.
they don´t even have internet, what a shitty place is that? what am I supposed to do 3 weeks long? Sit in my room and now and then talk to the therapeuts that can´t help me anyways since it´s incurable?... well... wtf. Just if I dont go insuracne might make me pay it and that´s something barely payable. I cant tell how much I just don´t wanna go, its far, I can see noone, I can talk noone, I can´t do anyhting because I´m too ill to really take part in any activities they do there

I saw this in  enjoipandas page and i had to do it too.



HOW MUCH FURRY ARE YOU

additionaly have to say i had my first Fursona with 4 yrs it was.. a fox D: before that age i didnt draw and mostly thought i was a tiger, but cant remember.

reading through this i found it a little bit pointless , because it only works for well cat and dog guys, but there are so many other furries arent there?
but its still fun to answer questions :D

[x] you meow/bark to get attention
[x] you find pets toys amusing (i collect toys .. and have pets. not enough pets though but hundreds of plush pals : D)
[] you get hyper by the smell of catnip (EEW not even my CAT likes that sh..)
[x] you growl/hiss when someone gets too close to your food (just sometimes i guess)
[] you growl/hiss when someone you dislike is too close to you ( depends.. but thats just so impolite i rather underpressure.)
[] you purr/shake your leg when someone shows you affection (this is so pointless, cats would purr but dogs only shake their leg on special areas sctratched)
[] if someone tosses a ball, you chase it and bring it back (no i´m not bringing back the ball. i´m not a ball bringer at all)
Total: 3

[x] you love to be scratched behind the ear
[x] you love fish/meat (only meat)
[x] you like to stick your head out through the window of a moving car.
[x] you like when people pet your head (depends on how they do D< )
[x] people can make you stop doing stuff by hitting you on the nose with a newspaper (um who wouldnt stop with anything then? if you are hit in the face)
[x] you think feathers are fun to play with
Total: 6

[x] you sleep a lot during daytime (if it counts i ´m nocturnal and sleep till midday?)
[x] you enjoy scaring birds
[x] you lick peoples faces to show you like them (um i just do that with one person lol just because..you dont jus tlick other peoples faces D: )
[x] you bite people if they annoy you ( i used to do that a long time xD )
[x] you tend to steal food from your friends/family's plate when you have eaten all of yours (i do that i wanna try everyhting but i barely ever eat up my own)
[x] milk or water is your favorite drink (i drink lots of milk and cocoa is one of my very faves, i drink water all the time but mixed with juice. i´d say that counts?)
Total: 6

[x] you own a collar and you enjoy wearing it (Yes Fff)
[x] you own a leash and enjoy wearing it (i own one but dont wear it.. i never tried but i always liked leashes kinda i always playd the dog in all games as a kid : D)
[x] you own animal ears/tail/paws, have a hat with ears, or a fursuit
[x] you enjoy long walks in the park (if its not boring yes )
[x] you meow/bark when you see something you want (sometimes )
Total: 5

[x] you call your hands and feet "paws" (sometimes)
[x] you tilt your head when you do not understand what someone is talking about
[] you run to the door when someone mentions a walk
[x] you really enjoy cuddling
[x] you stretch your body and whimper a bit every morning when you wake up
[x] you can wake up and go back to sleep right away after looking around
Total: 5

[x] you have your favorite spot besides your bed where you like to sleep
[x] you meow or bark very often
[x] you hide when you get scared (i want to but theres no where to hide else than my blanket D: )
[] you run to the door to see who it is every time someone comes in to the house
[] you like to chase flying insects and try to catch them with your bare hands
[] you tend to chew on stuff a lot (not sure always needa chew something when thinkin ,but usually food)
[] you like to do tricks to get a treat
Total: 3

[x] you own a wearable item/tag with your name on it
[x] you refer to yourself as an animal (sometimes do xD)
[x] your username has something to do with animals
[x] your e-mail has something to do with animals
[x] if you get a bleeding wound, you lick it to make it feel better
[x] you look for edible stuff often
Total: 6

[x] you often find yourself looking through the window for a long time (but most of time busy with loking into pc for a long time lol)
[] you like to say hi to strangers
[] you like to be petted when you have done something good
[x] people think you act like a pet (some i guess but i´m not that extreme at all)
[x] you growl/hiss at stuff you do not like
[] you like to eat grass
[x] if you get wet, you shake to get rid of the water
Total: 4

Final total: 38
Take your score and multiply it by 2 = 76%

lol

Hey yall those few who know i recently got an xbox i am playing skyrim like in nonstop. lol ive just waited too long i could play this. not beeing able to have it on pc is a pity tho. all those mooods... D:
well this is distracting and i dont get much art done but i still do something now and then

i just ordered 300 pairs of earring hooks so eh.

im still working on experiment characters, i just upload those to DA so well if you want to catch up you find all new Neraskryto stuff in the comic gallery http://neraskryto.deviantart.com/gallery/ just look at the folders for the exp refs.

still saving up money hm.. have to draw some gifts for mothers and fathers day .-. and i dont knwo what else to tell. i´m ok but not feeling that great the illness not beeing keen with me lately. And im frustrated i stuck here while i´d like to see the world, while my dad was in Dubai for a week without that i even knew about it

I am trying something new and i hope this helps me a whole lot.
As a few of you might know i have some handicaps, even though not visable, the chronic illness is a hard thing to handle,and there is no cure for it yet, unlike others, it didnt get any better in the past few years since it started.
well that is not the point, its that i am currently, not able to work, i´m thrown off my way, and i´m not that social irl as i´d like, or used to be. I always dreamed of a fursuit, but never knew people to sare this hobby in my near. Now that I do, i heavily try to save up, to have this possibility, but its moving on slow as you can imagine with that income i have... also even if i had this money, i still have to gather up for just one big con, to get to know some more people, travel somewhere alone..
i try to earn a bit with commissions, but its not going well ,i´m not that well known on here i guess. I wanted to open my etsy shop with buttons but then my printer broke i mean what the heck? things like this keep happening and i dont want to believe in back luck,really.

in truth is i believe this could help me with my life. In things as through this fun and icognito appearance, i may gain back things i once lost like self confidence and fun.. this could even help this illness to get calmer, and me to get stronger. This one little dream would mean so much to me, i hope it can get fullfilled not just in many years,but soon.

to fullfill this dream i need to gather up about 2500€ if i include one convention. People who donate certain amounts will get gifts of art in return, like buttons or pictures for bigger amounts.

For donates at 15€+ i will send donaters 2 buttons as thanks, just in case there are very many people ,this one will be as long as storage reaches.
For donates of 25€+ people will get a digital chibi "gifted" Or an ACEO card send to home
For donates of 60€+ people get a character of choice traditionally drawn and send to home, or a digital file if they prefer so.
For things that go beyond 120€ i will have to gather somehting really special, that includes the things previously listed and more!

If you want to donate, leave me a note on here with the donation amount, the art /characters you want to get done and your adress if it gets send home. Then i will send you a note with my (moms) paypal adress.
Ronja Körner