Things have been pretty hectic as of late. I have a new boyfriend, and life is great because of it. However, life has thrown me a wicked curve ball.

For those that don't know, I work in a call center doing customer service for a cell phone company. Recently we began doing care rallies and they're a lot of fun. Our most recent one was Tuesday, 04.19.2011. No, nothing bad happened with work. What did happen was much worse.

I received a call at 1230. Like a good girl I had my phone on silent mode so it didn't disturb anyone. Hell, I didn't even realize that I had a call until after I had eaten lunch and we were on our way back to Roanoke. The news gave me one helluva sucker punch and at the quick stop we had for gas I proceeded to lose lunch.

That call that came in at 1230 was from my brother. My dad had fallen off a roof and had been airlifted from Potts Creek to Roanoke Memorial Hospital. The ride back from Waynesboro was the longest it had ever been. Given how much my reaction to the situation affected me I texted my boyfriend (he lives in MD) and he offered to come down. It took me a moment to say yes, but I was glad I did.

What happened, exactly? Well, when he fell off the roof he got caught on a live wire, then fell the rest of the way to the ground. He had broken ribs, a collapsed lung, a fractured vertebrae, a possible broken jaw, and electrical burns. When I got to the hospital my brother and sister-in-law were waiting in the ER waiting room. Dad had been there two hours and had been no more updates as to what was going on. Chris, my brother, went up to a nurse to find out what was happening.

The verdict? A total of five broken ribs, the fractured vertebrae, punctured lung, three electrical burns (one on the left hand where it entered, and two blow outs on his posterior triceps), lots of trauma and swelling... no broken jaw, though they did have him in a neck brace the first day. It was hard to remain calm and collected, and I kept crying and tearing up whenever I thought about him. The majority of the Redman clan came in, too.

Day two. Most of the swelling was gone, and he had the neck brace off as the scans they did the night before showed he didn't need them. It was still hard seeing him like that. I got to introduce him to Andrew, and he approved. Hell, most of the family approved since he came down on such short notice.

Day three. Even more swelling was gone, but now the bruises were showing up. He was a bit annoyed because he wanted out so he could smoke. I was able to talk to a nurse to see if we could get him an electronic cigarette and it was approved.

Day four through five. More bruises and dad was in more pain. on day five, yesterday, they gave him an epidural for the pain, and now he can breathe easier and cough without a lot of pain. They keep telling him he needs to cough because he has the beginning signs of pneumonia.

And today? Gods, I wish I could be with him again since it's a holiday. Instead I'm stuck in the call center dealing with selfish people that have nothing better to do than to gripe and complain. Seriously, people, get a life and stop giving a damn if your "pit'cha texts on ya bidniz phoam" isn't working. There are more important things in life.

Whoa... apparently hitting enter after putting stuff in to the subject FA is like "UPDATE NOW" and posts it even if I didn't mean to... Eheh...

SO! o.0; It has been a LONG time. In case you all are wondering, I kind of forgot about this place (save for adding people I met at SheVaCon) and came back to 2000+ submissions... Finally got through them all and responded to everything.

As for art... I have a bunch of sketches I have kept in a folder at work. <.< I really should just bring them home (since some are NSFW... *cough*) and scan them.

As for school, I'm nearly finished. We're over with in June! Then I'm gonna get my certification. And then start saving up for Pittsburgh. 'noke, I love you, but the 'burgh is home.

So. I'm open for commissions. I've changed how I'm gonna do it, so it's more negotiation than anything.

For an example of the most recent commission please see the following image. :D She also got a free icon out of it.


Onto the health update. My doc never got back to me. I've gotten past the point where I care. I'm not feeling sick anymore, and getting some energy work done makes me feel far better than any meds ever could. I'm slowly weaning off of prescribed medication now, too. Wootage!

Also, I haven't really been sick anymore since deciding to make these changes. I'm also slowly changing everything I get to being organic or natural. I'm also slowly moving to cutting out corn syrup of any kind from my diet again, and drinking more water than anything.

Interesting fact: did you know that when you drink a soda or fruit juice your body actually processes it as food? And because of this people are more dehydrated nowadays than they ever were?

Weird, the things you learn.

I figured what the heck. Might as well try, ja?

I'm going to be offering commissions. After all, I have to pay for school and bills while still being able to eat!
Prices are as follows:

$10 for a sketch (mind you, they would be more cleaned up than the examples here)
Examples: http://rantnraven.files.wordpress.c.....s_by_rotzi.jpg
http://rantnraven.files.wordpress.c.....__by_rotzi.jpg

$25 for inking
Examples:
http://rantnraven.files.wordpress.c.....s_by_rotzi.jpg
http://rantnraven.files.wordpress.c.....l_by_rotzi.jpg

$35 for digital color
http://rantnraven.files.wordpress.c...../09/lovely.jpg
http://rantnraven.files.wordpress.c.....zi-d2xil60.png

Depending on the amount of detail and what you want it may be more. Backgrounds will start at $10 and go up, depending on the detail.
If interested, please just email me at jessrotzi[at]gmail.com or message me on facebeook with the subject line reading "Commission". My paypal account is under the gmail address.

Granted, it's not entirely just me. The shop is under my friend's name, and she a lot for sale on there....

As for me, in my down time when I'm not making costumes, drawing smut, or working I make jewelry. Earcuffs to be exact.

www.etsy.com/shop/gwillblack

Check 'em out! Purchase something if that be your fancy.

Twice so far I've had people comment on an out dated journal just going "Journal 69"

Is this happening for anyone else or is it just me?
:/ And I'm gettin' pissed off about it...

For the past year I've been going to this locally owned and operated donut/coffee shop. Toward the middle of last year my friend, and now current roomie, got a job with them. Each morning before I go into work I get myself a chai latte, or a hot cocoa, or some sort of smoothie. If I forget breakfast I get a donut, too. My favorite donut happens to be a toss up between caramel apple pie and caramel apple cheesecake -- really depends on my mood.

Honestly, I think I spend between 50-75 in there a month. Per year that would be 600-900 dollars.

Today in there to get my morning tea and donut. I did not know it at the time, but my roomie had called in sick. What I did know was that last week she had put in her notice because she got a job that pays her better. The proprietor of the shop was there working this morning. He greeted me and asked how my roomie was doing. What really threw me for a loop was that he was smiling and seriously said, "I hope she's on her death bed." There was no joking lilt or anything in his tone to suggest it was something meant to be laughed at. Even if it was, that was really uncalled for. The other worker that was there even look taken aback.

I was speechless. I just got my donut, chai, and left.

What I need an opinion on is how to bring it up to the guy. I love the place -- they make the best donuts ~ever~. And I'm in there every day I have to be at work.

Seriously, how does one approach this?

:3 There's nothing that says "weird tradition" than making a sushi fest each time there's a snow storm.

I'll be posting pictures from it a bit later, as well as the recipes for what I used in it.

And now... time to watch Paranormal Activity.

<.< I seem to do a lot of disappearing acts from here. I got back on a few days ago... and just finished clearing out the 12000+ submissions... Egads, not doing that again.

So for those of you going "Why the feck is she favoriting all of this now?" that was why.

Yup...

I'm going back to lurking now. :D

I love to make costumes. I do, I do. (Please say someone got that reference...) The only problem right now is that sewing is completely dehydrating me. <<; My hands were in a state of NOT HAPPY today. And to think that I have another costume to finish... then for the sheer hell of it I may attempt a Trainer-like costume from FFX-2. << The costumes in that game amuse me. Hell, I'd probably wear one of those dresses to work just 'cause. That and to show off my skillz.

The only think I'm not looking forward to when it comes cosplaying as a guy would be binding my chest down. ><; DDDs are not easy and it's worse than a corset when it comes to breathing. Ah, the joys of duct tape... because ace bandages are too small to do it properly...

In other news... It looks like after driving back from Richmond on Monday morning I may have to still come in to work that day. Turns out the girl that was swapping days with me didn't have that day off... Yeeeeeeeea.... Not fun. And the managers were out today. Joy. So depending on how exhausted I am upon getting back from Boston Anime I may or may not show up at work.

I can hear me now. 4 am, calling the TL phone going, "Hi! This is Jessi Redman. Just calling to let you know that it's 4 am-ish, I'm still driving back from Richmond and I'm this many hrs from Daleville. i'm not going to show up at work today. I honestly did try to get the day off." ...Maybe I can get her to call me on my off day to see what we can do...

Ugh.. I need s'eep. Lots of it.

I promise this isn't as emo-ish as it sounds. It's just some thoughts that need to get out.

As my year of chaos gradually comes to a close, I realize now that I was right on the money when I dubbed my 23rd year that. For those that are wondering what it is by me dubbing this my year of chaos, the number 23 is supposedly the number for the Eris, Goddess of Chaos. So many things in my life have changed. Acquaintances came and went and I learned who my friends really were. I attended my first Pride fest. My family learned I was gay. Job changes. Me finally getting out of Covington (hopefully for good)... Skies above, I could go on, but these were the most prominent.

I must admit, I'm going to miss Covington. For the longest time I considered it home, and a small part of me still considers it that. However, as things changed I realized how ill-suited I was for this town. After all, how does a gay, somewhat vegetarian artist fit in a small, southern town?

Hopefully by this time next year or the summer after my roomies and I will be heading out to Seattle. Those that know me are probably surprised seeing as I've been saying how much I loathe the west coast. Granted, I Have yet to be all over the west coast - I've only been to southern California. Maybe Seattle will change my view of things.

Another thing I think about is maybe the reason I want to set out of Covington so badly is because I'm running. I wasn't exactly thrilled when my family found out I was gay (it was an accident on my cousin's behalf). They sometimes seem to be walking on eggshells around me, or at other times flat out saying that I don't know what I want, I haven't given men a chance. So maybe I am running from the problem instead of trying to fix it. In any case, I know at least my roommates are accepting and don't care what religion, sexuality, etc I am, and for that I'm thankful.

As the year draws to a close I hope those of you that set goals were able to reach them. For those that didn't, at least you tried, ja? May your Gods/Goddesses smile upon you in the coming year.

It's been a while, ja?

<<; Not having decent net is kind of keeping me away.

On the bright side of things, the inner lynx in me is starting to wake back up after a long, long hiatus. An ex of mine kind of sent her into hibernation and she never got back out. However, thanks to a co-worker of mine Kiara is finally feeling much better and not quite so dirty any more.

In other news, I work at a local cell phone company as a customer care rep.

@_@ People, I have realized, are stupid. "Why is mah phone off?!" Most of the time, it's because they didn't pay their bill (and they wonder why the hell their phone is off).

I really, REALLY am dreading Christmas. Black Friday was horrid.

How's everyone doing, though?
<< Psst, if you want me to view your submissions, just send me a note or leave a comment. I sorta of saw that 7500+ that I had, gave a nervous laugh, and deleted them all.

...okay, so it's reeeeeeally been a while since I last signed in here on FA. *glances up at the 3000+ updates* Eh eh..

So.. um... how goes it?

Not too much has changed, either. The party I had in January went as planned despite more than half of the people not showing up...

I've been applying to all sorts of jobs lately - I reeeeeally wanna get the hell out of Dodge... or rather, Covington. I need some place.. different. And some place to work that's not Walmart. I swear, demons run the place and are sucking our souls out. There've been more days that I'm walking to the back to clock out thinking how funny it would be if I were to just randomly stab something of mine with a pen [normally it's my eye or hand]. More than likely I'm gonna see a therapist or find a friend I can confide in. Though I do have a lot of friends, there are few I would tell everything to. Thus far, there are only three I can do that with - Ruth, Rissa, and Streea.

...for the record, I loathe lunar eclipses, blood moons, and full moons. Bad things always seem to happen during those times to me.

In other, happier news I'm starting to be a bit more out going. Funny, three years ago you couldn't catch me dead in a club. Now I practically have to beg to go to one [havin' a POS mommy van is teh suck]. Dancing is far more fun when people are actually doing it instead of pretending to [in order to understand what I'm talking about go out to a redneckish club (like the Clover Club out in WV) then go to a gay club (like the Park out in Roanoke) - the differences between the two is astounding]. Granted... people at the Park are nearly doing sex on the floor instead of dancing.. but in my mind dancing can be pseudo-sex.

Alright... I'm actually just rambling a lot. It helps me sleep at night. *nodnod* And seeing as how it's 23:15 here in Covington and I have to wake up at 06:00.. yea. Sleep is a must.

This is teh Rotzi, over and out. Take care, all.

The 18th will mark my 23rd winter in this life. I've a feeling that it will go far better than my last annual did. After all, nothing could be worse than having the two people who claimed to have you in their hearts forget their promise to you about it. No, I'm not nearly as bitter about it anymore but their is still some pain. Time will be the one to heal that.

This year things will be changing. I'm going to get out of this backwater town and find a place to mark as my own. It may be in Roanoke, it may be in another state. Despite that I know where home will always be. I've tried to find another place I can lovingly call home but the li'l house in Virginia will always be it. No other place sounds right - at least yet.

I know I've kept saying things along these lines, though this year will most definitely be different. After all, 23 is chaotic enough and seems like a good year to change.

Here's to chaos and the new beginnings I hope it brings.

Work has stolen my soul I guess. At least that's the excuse I'm gonna be givin'. Still looking for a real job. In the mean times I'm stuck at the Mall-wart cashierin'.

I've been workin' on projects. *nodnod* The one I've been doin' on and off is the 100 poems project. I'm nearly 50% complete finished with the poems part, and I've 4/100 pictures finished.

As for my other side projects [sapphire realm and the zodiac priestesses]... I haven't really done much. Sure, I've fleshed out my notes some more, but not much. @@; Egads, doin' background stories on non-traditional harpies and nagas is a bit harder than I expected.... same thing with the elves and dwarves.

Maybe I should hit up the hot cocoa and spike it with vodka and kahlua. Nothin' beats brainstorming like booze induced dreamin'... and Project A-ko playin' in the background. <3

Alrighty, so I've been gone a looooooong time. Egads. SHAME ON YOU, ROTZI!

Well, to let everyone know what I've been up to...

20 pounds have been lost since finishing college. Huzzah! Now for more mundane stuffs.... I decided to get a job at the local wal-mart while I look for a decent one. Fun times. As much as things change, they always seem to stay the same there, just with new faces.

I've also been doing some sketches for my stories [mainly Sapphire Realm]. I thank those of you that went over my notes and gave me pointers.

Sapphire Realm sketches completed:
Harpies
Mutant Harpies
Ejo
World Map
Demonkind
Khas
Khalistyar
Tcharryas

In addition... I've been tweaking the designs for my Zodiac Priestesses.

All thirteen signs [Ophichus being the one that is normally left out] have been completed, as well as the few knights that are still alive. Things have also been changed so that the knight that was Litus's lover is now her brother. ...and, no, the previous story is not applying to them in any way, shape, or form - other than the fact that brother dearest is normally projecting himself somewhere instead of actually being there physically.

In real-life news [omigawd! Life outside of the internets!!] I finally got a chance to meet a friend of mine that I've been yapping with for quite some time online. Yay for chance meetings and the need to have a new tablet because the other one finally croaked. It shall go to the big waste pile in the sky.

There is a new book in my life, too - The All Soul's Faire, written by a local author. o.o Tis spiffeh so far. Now if only odd things like this really did happen in the Covington/Clifton Forge area....

Time now for s'eep. Rotzi ish playin' SLAVE for ebil mal-wart come the morrow.

...joy.

I'm almost finished with school! Yes! My demo reel is due THIS coming Tuesday. @@; So much has happened these past three years since I've been up here in the 'burgh. Five boyfriends and one girlfriend, one job [only thing that's been real stable, actually, four places I lived at [I refuse to call 'em home - that's in Covington, Virginia]... So many friends have come and gone and I'm getting my chance to leave soon.

However... as much as I hate the city, I am going to miss Pittsburgh. There's a lot more to it that just downtown - and I got a refresher course in that two days ago. There's so much I want to see before I leave but I may not end up getting to. I'm gonna try my damnedest to see it though. You only live each life as who you are once. Sure, the soul goes on and lives forever as it enters a new life but who's to say you'll find the people you've met in this life [psst, this is my OWN belief; please, keep your opinions to yourself]? Certain people will always find each other throughout time but some people come together just by chance.

I'm not quite sure that has me thinking this. Things have just felt... off for some time for me. I'm expecting something big to happen that will impact my life for a long time to come, and I'm not just talking about graduation.


*shrug* Then again, these could just be the ramblings of a sleep deprived college student getting ready to set up for portfolio presentation. Who's to say, ja?

1. What is your best friend's Mom's name?
Ruth << It's my gramma.

2. What body part do you hate?
My breasts - far too annoyin' for their own good. Tch, and why the hell to people keep sayin' that they want my breast size? BIGGER AIN'T ALWAYS BETTER!!!

3. Who was the hottest teacher you ever had?
Hmm. I've considered some of my teachers cute, not hot, so I'd have t' say one of my high school history teachers. *shifty*

4. What was the last gift you received, and who was it from?
Huh.. << I'm just gonna say lunch from my bf on Tuesday.

5. What body part do you wash first?
Arms.

6.Do you have any piercings and how many?
Right ear. All others became infected and closed up.

8. Is your driveway steep?
Kinda-sorta.

9. What's your favorite flavored condom?
Never used any flavored ones that I can remember.

10. Have you ever been tied up?
*shifty* *coughcoughcough!*

11. What was the worst thing you ever got grounded for?
Telling my dad I was bi. Not the worst in my opinion, but to him it was the end of the world.

13. Have you ever had two dates in one night?
Lunch date with a friend and then a date date with the boyfriend.

14. How many times have you been cursed at?
...I was supposed t' keep a record of this? o.o

15. Which shoe do you put on first?
Left or right - depends on which one I grab first.

16. How old are you?
22

17. Have you ever been to a gay bar?
Yup.

18. Friends with Benefits?
Once upon a time in a land five hours southeast of Pittsburgh...

19. Is there one thing all of your love interests have had in common?
No one had fair hair.

22. Who is the last person you usually think about before you fall asleep?
Depends on my thoughts at the time.

23. Have you ever had a song written about you?
o_o; Nope.

24. If you had to choose to not ever wash your bed sheets again or not wash your bath towel ever again which would you choose?
O.o;;; Not... washing... one or the other!? AHHHHH!!!!
Uh.. hmm... bed sheets then? Those would be cheaper t' buy in the long run.

25. Have you ever found anything in your parents' bedroom that was questionable?
Nope. If there is anything questionable they keep it well away from prying eyes.

26. What was your childhood nickname?
Just Jessi, or Brat.

27. When is the last time you played the air guitar?
In elementary school.

28. Have you ever peeked in the opposite sexes locker room?
Not that I recall.

29. What's the weirdest thing you have done while driving?
Sing loudly and off-key to Belinda Carlisle in order to stay awake after going to see PotCII.

30. Have you ever bitten your toenails?
When I was a kid

31. How do you normally eat your Oreo cookie?
Shove 'em into my mouth and munch away.

33. Name something you do when you're alone that you wouldn't do in front of others?
Adjust the girls when the bra shifts.

36. How many drinks does it take before you get drunk?
Let's just say that I'm a cheap date when it comes to that sort of thing.

37. Why are you doing this survey?
I found it amusing.

39. Do you scrunch or fold your toilet paper?
Fold... why the hell's this relevant?

41. Do you have any strange phobias?
Dogs... and crowds.

42. Have you ever stuck a foreign object up your nose?
Not to my knowledge.

43. What is the stupidest thing you've ever done at a bar?
Trying to get drunk so I wouldn't notice the crowd. << I noticed it even more after that and started to freak out.

45. Have you ever called your love interest by another girl/guys name?
Nope! ^^

46. Have you ever gotten caught sleeping while on a date?
Nope.

47. Have you ever played twister?
Heh. Ja. Yay for freakin' people out with my flexibility!

49. Have you ever found your date's/lover's brother or sister to be hotter then your date?
...I don't think any of them have had bro's/sis's that I've met before.

50. How many Bryce's do you know?
None.

Also known as OMFG what the hell am I gonna do?! AHH!

Eheh. I'm not like that at the moment. I may be like that tomorrow. In the queue of things to get finished before class tomorrow:

-Painting six new images [will show up later on here. Promise.]
-Tweaking models a bit
-Re-rendering the tweaked models
-Putting everything on a DVD and doin' some minor editing [and hoping that/praying that/selling of soul if demo isn't 90 seconds long]

Wee...

*poof* May I not burn myself out this time around. Granted, this point last quarter I was so exhausted that I couldn't think straight. Then again, that could have been because I was walkin' five miles to and from my bus stop on Saturdays and sometimes Mondays.

Because, if you do, go forth and check out http://www.furaffinity.net/user/naughtyotsel She's my best friend and a really spiffy pr0n artist.

o.o Go look at her stuffs. Teh Rotzi commands it... or just really suggests it.

I'm gonna be an aunt! <3 Weeee!
Yes, folks, my older brother and his girlfriend are gonna have a baby. Then after that I'm gonna have a new sister. No, my mum isn't preggers. Bro and gf are gettin' married. Weeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee!

And, more spiffeh news [though I don't see it being nearly as good....]...
The Kill Pit [as in the new Spike TV show that they're filming down here] is doing something RIGHT ON MY STREET! Woot!

Okies, so it's not exactly on my street, but it's close enough. ;p They're doin' somethin' along 54th, or just off it. I'm not 100% on that. Heehee

Yes folks, the wondrous Rotzi has FAILED a class. YAY!
/fake enthusiasm

And, like my prediction on DA, I went home, wished I were drunk and passed out after cryin' my eyes out. ...and I didn't come to until 5:20 this afternoon. Note, I went to bed around 11:45.

I'm just glad I have today and tomorrow off. @@ I need time t' model/animate some more. Then pack up. I went ahead and told the roomies I'm movin' out and, as suspected, they've been trying to talk me out of it cause things are supposed t' get better, so says them. Personally I think that things will get better when I get out.

Yes! Teh friendly neighborhood lynxeh ish movin' t' Oakland, PA... as soon as I get the confirmation from the guy rentin' the place out. After so much drama here I just can't take it anymore. I don't want to start hating the gf and bf, but that's where staying here is leading me. Moving out would be beneficial to both their health and mine.

..so... any one here livin' out in the Oakland, PA area?

And the Kiriban was missed. Oh the horror! My page and art are so unluffed. /fake_sadness

=======
...okies, so I got the area mixed up a bit. Tis a bit south east of Oakland in Greenfield. I think its the place with the reptile breeder, I'm not sure. @@; I replied to about six posts so it's hard t' figure out.

Hand I've gotta admit this, I hate it when people are right. What I'm yappin' about will just be known t' who is involved, and that's that.

In other news methinks that pre-portfolio is gonna be the death of me. ;p What people find strange is that people normally say that about the production team. That's the class I'm least worried about because I trust my team mates.

What I need t' do for Pre-Portfolio:
> Have at least 6-8 BGs paints [and tryin' to aim for as close to photo real as I can get... tch. I know that's not gonna happen, but I can hope]
> Model, texture, animate, and digitally composite 3-5 pieces
- side note on this, I'm gonna aim t' have part of this as my seven weeks worth o' work for Advanced modeling and animation topics, so I'm killin' two birds [er.. maybe 3-5 birds, dependin' on what you're lookin' at] with one stone

What I need to finish for Production Team
> The BGs [8/10 complete]
> Character sheet for Emo-Goth Boi [Yes, that is what I dubbed him]
> Animate EGB
> Ink cells
> Help with painting said cells

The poetry project I'm doin' is still comin' along, though a bit slowly considerin' what I have ahead o' me. Three images are completed, a few are sketched, and I have no clue how many poems are in it.

I've also started writing a novella entitled Memories involving Litus [Zodiac Angel Capricornus http://www.furaffinity.net/view/58061/ ] and her girlfriend, Tiffany [well, that's her human alias]. I'm in need of people t' help me beta it. Leave a comment if you're interested.

Creative burn out on the horizon, maybe? *shrug* Who knows. Memories is just something to keep me from goin' insane. *shifty* And Sae and Raven's story is just for fun, though that has yet to be even started... Just outlined and summarized for future reference.

Now duty calls. Oh the joys of tutorin' math stuffs. ;p And I'm not bein' sarcastic or anything