ssjtyler

Thank you.

Thank you for your love.
Thank you for your acceptance.
Thank you for being able to see me as I am.
Thank you for being able to see everything I could be.

You have helped me more than I can ever put into words and I continue to grow and find myself more every day.

I know a lot of people have already said thank you for helping me because they could see how much I needed it.

Thank you daddy for everything, for helping me find the family I needed and for reminding me that i'm not alone, that I am wanted, I am loved.

Safely arrived home.

I had such an amazing time in Canada once again, it was incredible from start to finish.

Met up with  drabbit and we got stuck in a room together which we almost escaped from that was super fun.
Got to finally go meet up with  danraccoon and  catmonkshiro in Toronto that was super awesomes as always.
Won some torches at Playdium.
Visited the Rearz store in person and got not just crinkles but an adorable onesie too.

Then Tomkat, a full on week away from the world in the middle of scenic nowhere Canada with a bunch of babies and I actually gotta join in as well it was amaaaaaaazing.

Made some very good new friends there that I really wanna go back and see another time and ABU were so incredibly generous with the number of samples they gave out it was in cutesy space, cushies, little paws and super dry kids for most of the time.

Leaving the camp was pretty sad, we left super early before anyone else was even up on monday and made our way back to ottawa for more cuddles and super delicious ice cream cake for my birthday.

Hey everyone, this is the second last day in civilization, today we are going to drive across to Toronto and try meet up with the ever awesome Dan, Shiro and meet my new chew toy Kin for the first time!

Unfortunately after Toronto will be at the camp for a week and it's very unlikely will have any kind of internet connection at all.

I am going to have an awesome time i'm sure and I love you all very very much.

I think i preferred submission http://www.furaffinity.net/view/10000000/ to submission http://www.furaffinity.net/view/20000000/ but ... it's still the 20 millionth submission.

It's great to have been a small part of this amazing journey so far.

Ello everyone.

If you are in this journal http://www.furaffinity.net/journal/7399477/ with lines could you please record them and send them to feeferscat[at]gmail.com please?

It was a long weekend, 12 hour drive down but then a super nice evening with the ever amazing and totally lovely  fudgebunny1

The next day was the event, met up with Welshie and drove up to the hotel, had a nice little shower and dropped him off at the station.

Met up with Jamjar, she's really super awesome, very adorable but both her and Loupy were panicking quite a lot it was hard to keep them both from totally freaking out and I'm afraid to say with jamjar I failed and she had to leave it was too much too soon, but i'm still super proud of her for managing to make it.

I tried being little but I think with all the trying to help people out i was already deep into caretaker and yeah i've still not seen that little pup around in years so it was mostly some colouring and a little cuddling with my plushie, neko and loupy.

I did get to try out some of the toys which was really awesomes, the trike is amazing.

The cutesy highlight was teaching  toddlergirl how to colour Kiwi's from just the five colours, none of which were kiwi colours.

The way home was kinda worse, my car stopped working 60 miles from home so it's still there and we had to get a bus the rest of the way.

So with the 80th strip of  kammypup's amazing comic done that's enough of a buffer to start Animated Tendencies, the same deal-o as Found but i'd really like to outsource more of the vocal work.


If you'd be interested in any of the roles, record yourself with your name/furry name (someway i can go, oh yes that was ... ... uh ... who was that again...) and the sentences after the character name below, if there's a big and a little role, you gotta try for both parts please so i get some continuity or the voice, if you want to do Kammy's role, you gotta do her big, little and when she's narrating
Mail the samples in mp3 or wav to Feeferscat (at) gmail (dot) com or pop it up on some site i can grab it from in any format you want.

Here's the cast list and roles and if anyone has the part yet.

** - Cast under consideration
Bold - Cast confirmed

Cast

Taara - Ctrinkle-pants Kimmy is back!!

LilJennie - That story sounds pretend like these dollies.

Kassandra - "Took" sweetie, use your big girl words.

Marco - We are running out of things he can claim for spain

Alex - That dog he brought is huge

Little Maria - Hola Papi!

Tanny - It hardly matters, you are shrinking faster than a sheet of polystyrene #6

Jen - Taara, why she crying?

Gamestreamer -It's taking a dirt nap!

Shyanne - Children under 2 years old fly free!

Wanderingshepherd - Babies come out speaking like THAT!

spooky-ooky - Ahh! This FOY cream is amazing

Emeraldsnow -I know! I feel fabulous

littleredloli - No worries puppy

Lauren Rivers - Yay! Throw these old stripes away!

Peek-a-boo girl - Peek-A...

Copycat - OMG! I can't believe i'm meeting you!!

Alma - Nope! One. And then bed.

Cheesy - Oh wow! I think you did big sis!

Moogie - The famous Kammy Ridge, we finally meet!

Butters - I could carry you if you were little!

Babystar - Oy! Oy You! Girl! You Girl!


---

**Kammy (Big) - Yeah that's not creepy at all...
**Kammy (Little) - You know dinosuar, you don't have to call me "princess" right?
**Narrator - Because Mommy, I mean mom won't let me walk home from school on my own, she got me a dragon escort to bring me home everyday.

Aricub as Kammy

shippofoxkawaiiuke as Peneolope

miku_kojitsu as Babydwagon

Motheaten as Dr Reva

Lie2u5x as Ponce

Babychris as himself

miku as Unseen explorer

Fiona as Herself

Aricub as Jan

Mister Drifter as himself

animorph11 as Yourrisingstorm

Demewter as Tiffany

Skylarfox as Viceroy

Skylarfox as Julius

W..what?

People are asking me to draw stuff?

For actual drawings, ehhh... I'm kinda crap still http://www.furaffinity.net/scraps/runt/ anything just in ink is what i've done personally and it's not great, it'll continue to get better but for now, it sucks.

If you need something inked and coloured i'm much better at that and do indeed take those, I should probably charge for those but ... I dunno, it feels like I am just using someone elses work.

Also, I gotta thank everyone that I do work with, yesterday was actually busy, I ... I have never been busy before with two comics to colour, a bunch of pictures to ink and colour it was a very strange almost proud feeling.

A moment of ... hey ... I'm actually doing this.

Hey everyone, can you maybe give the super awesome  Benihime_Shido some assistance with her https://www.patreon.com/princeshido she's amazing and I wanna do more colouring for her!

Always good to update these once in a while.

... dunno if i'm actually happy with the results honestly, I guess they are accurate but maybe I was hoping for different ones.

== Results from http://bdsmtest.org/ ==
94% Daddy/Mommy
85% Vanilla
85% Girl/Boy
83% Ageplayer
83% Pet
71% Owner
56% Non-monogamist
54% Submissive
52% Switch
47% Brat Tamer
47% Primal (Prey)
44% Master/Mistress
43% Brat
41% Dominant
39% Degrader
37% Experimentalist
29% Primal (Hunter)
28% Voyeur
27% Slave
26% Exhibitionist
20% Degradee
16% Rigger
14% Sadist
11% Rope Bunny
6% Masochist
See my results online at http://bdsmtest.org/result.php?id=1188731

You aren't really alone.

There's love and cuddles just waiting for you here.

I wish from the bottom of my heart I could reach out of the screen and give you all the love that you need because you really truly deserve to feel that right now.

One of my favourite christmas songs is one of the saddest, https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=jxxTHzERTsk have yourself a merry little christmas.

I think it's the lines, "Through the years; We all will be together" until the arrival of the internet this was fantasy but now we can make it real, even if you are alone, you aren't really, you don't have to be.

Reach out to someone on twitter, on facebook, on instant messages, on skype, on tumblr, on instagram, on snapchat, on fur affinity; reach out and let someone know they aren't alone either.

Let your heart be light.

Spread that love, that warmth, that connection to everyone you talk to and most importantly;

Have yourself a merry little christmas now.

Just had my first injection of my new hormone treatement, i've been on pills for about 4 years and the injections are generally better for me.

But  drifterkitty told me the truth, it's not hormone treatment at all, it's puppy treatment! In a few weeks i'll start to have soft fuzzy puppy fur allllll over and a sensitive little spot just at my tailbone where my new tail will start to sprout from.

I'm kinda scared , it's a lot to take in that people have secretly been planning to turn me into a puppy, but i'm also super excited.

I really like it a lot, it's a really great game and honestly it doesn't surprise me so many people associate with it, find a connection to it at some level.

There's a reason it's top of Metacritc http://www.metacritic.com/browse/ga.....s/pc/metascore games list just now.

What does every person tell you, don't spoil the game, don't look it up how it plays out.

Not because we don't want you to know but we want you to go on the same journey, the same amazing adventure that leaves such a deep emotional resonance with everyone that plays it.

There's so much meta to the game, so much that speaks to you as the player, from the very start of what name to use to the final revelation of what that name actually means to the characters in the game.

Undertale - The Roleplaying game where you don't have to destroy anyone.

You can also be a monster, you can play the game just like any other, kill everyone in your path, but this is where i love the game, doing so is not a good thing, you lose so much of the heart of the game if you do; you even permanently change the game so people are more wary of you on future playthroughs.

Undertale is only going to be around a few months I suspect, but it's going to leave such an impression on those that walked out of the ruins, that it will have a lasting legacy not just in the amazing art that people create, the stories they share, the small community that is around it; but it will make us look at the way we play computer games.

Why fight?

Why become a monster?

Why not have a good time with making new friends?

It's  loupylupine birthday today, he's going to be very verrrrrrrrrrry thickly padded and put in the cutest dressy dress I can find, so why not go with them a very happy birthday :)

I cannot not worry about you.

There is a little you shaped hole in my heart and I am always going to worry for you when you are in trouble, when you are hurt, when you aren’t around.

You make being here matter to me, you make my experience better, happier, more complete.

So I am sorry, but I will always worry about you.

It is what friends do.

I would really rather not go back to delivering pizza to make ends meet, but that is the way it is going to go, my hours at work have been cut back and I am proper struggling to make ends meet.

It has been like this for a bit, I have told some people but not many, I am applying for any other job that does full time and even hopefully have an interview next week for one, just waiting for the company to get back to me.

Work has been "dry" here the mini oil depression has meant major layoffs and lots of people chasing the same job.

I need help. I am struggling so much and don't know where else to turn.

I can't deny, I am good.

I have many people make me blush and then feel slightly awkward when they say I'm special; I can make them feel good, help them feel safe.

I'm a good caretaker for sure.

I'm finding my little toddler steps as a good little, it's not something that comes at all easily to me.

I see others in this scene and when they want to be little it's like a switch, just *click* and they are deep into that little happy space.

I know others that struggle a little, having to be coaxed down into little space, held and cuddled and told it's okay, you are allowed to feel this way, it's good to be little.

That's the level i'm still at, I need other people to help me with it, trying it by myself usually just results in finding all the dark places i've hidden from and shutting down into sobbing tears.

So I am getting to be a little some, i just need more help still. I'm better at it than i used to be and will continue to find more of my little side as I explore more.

But puppy.

I don't even know how to explore that at all, I think like little I'd need someone here with me to try.

 loupylupine tried once and it wasn't a great experience, he was a pretty good handler but i just didn't get any puppyspace at all.

I'm so unsure about it, it's a very hard place for me to even talk about, that longing wanting to be controlled somehow clashes completely with my rather naturally dominant nature.

I've not met many people that i feel safe enough to give control to, i don't even know how to start finding that.

So when people tell me i'm a good puppy.

I nod and smile and say thanks but I know it's not true, not yet anyway but maybe it will be someday.

I'll keep working on it, finding and exploring with friends, family and loved ones to find what i need.

I want to keep trying to find out how to be more than just good, how to feel more than that.

And find my way to being a good puppy.

I would very much just like hugs please?

I've been feeling increasingly alone and left out of things and some hugs would be awesome.

Thanks.

From  toddlergirl who took it from  zee-zee

How long have you been on FurAffinity?
At least 10 years, exact time is unknown - it says Registered since: December 10th, 2005 11:25
But my first picture was uploaded march 30th 2005 and i'm pretty sure i was around a little beofre that.

What does your username mean?
Smaller, weaker, facing obvious disadvantages.
I liked the dopey rather dumb character from Animaniacs a lot.

Describe yourself in three words.
well-intentioned, warmhearted, short-tempered

I often mess up, i'm just a person at the end of the day, i really try my hardest but often that's sub-par and I wish i could improve myself but it's slow.
My biggest issue is anger, i've got a a lot of problems with it which i try to keep people away from because it's a part of myself i've never really found a way to deal with and people don't usually stick around to help out with it when they've experienced it.

Are you left or right handed?
Right, but I used to be left when i was very little.

What was your first submission?
http://www.furaffinity.net/view/3420/ - March 30th 2005, I don't even recognise the person in that picture now. That's of my first fursuit, an old english sheep dog, mascot style suit the head was stolen at a london furs meet

What is your favourite type of art to create?
I like drawing more than writing, it takes a lot less time to see the result and the mistakes are generally more noticable where as writing it can be a tense or grammar error and i'll just never see it.

If you could instantly master a different art style, what would it be?
Any, seriously, i'd like a art style rather than ... whatever the heck it is i'm doing right now. I guess sloppy and poor quality is technically an art style.

What was your first favourite?
Very early on  Kanada picture http://www.furaffinity.net/view/15800/

What type of art do you tend to favourite the most?
Stuff that inspires me, stuff that has friends of mine in it, stuff that's just really cute, stuff i've helped on in some way, stuff i wish i could be a part of.

Who is your all-time favourite FA artist?
For what?
Different artists do different things.
But if I just gotta pick one, I'm gonna pick  toddlergirl
Because I can, because she's amazing, she does drawing, writing, music, crotchet, mud drawing, i can't think of a person that's experimented in more forms than her.

If you could meet anyone on FurAffinity in person, who would it be?
I've been really lucky that i've met a large number of people on FA but there's a lot more i'd still like to meet. I guess  kitsuno would be pretty up there.

How has a fellow FAer impacted your life?
 ssjtyler and  peggles727 has helped more than I can ever put into words

What are your preferred tools to create art?
Painttool Sai for drawing, notepad for writing

What is the most inspirational place for you to create art?
For writing, just in bed is best.
Drawing i've only ever really drawn at my desk.

What is your favourite FurAffinity memory?
Probably submission 10 million http://www.furaffinity.net/view/10000000
Submission 20 million is probably going to be this year sometime...

I'm working on http://www.furaffinity.net/journal/6903475/ slowly, so keep an eye out for a picture of you randomly appearing soon but most of my work just now is going into .. well that's the first problem, the comic doesn't really have a name.

Daemon-Genius is the current work in progress because it was two words I mushed together quickly.

I'm pretty excited about it, I know it'll probably not come to much but it's something I am doing, something I can feel really good about, something more than just me, an ongoing story I can share with people.

My initial plan is to get a backlog of 8 issues and then post weekly, so hopefully peoples aren't waiting too long for the next instalment as I should have 2 months worth of comics ready.

If you want to see what it's all about in advance you can hit up my Patreon and get previews of everything that's happening at https://www.patreon.com/Feefers

So that's all that's happening, if you have any questions, i guess it's TMI tuesday so fire away.

Really you should read  ursa-mina journal at http://www.furaffinity.net/journal/6953993/ it is much better.

Nekosune and my journey started on Thursday, leaving Aberdeen and driving to Coventry, http://bit.ly/1WeMiX8
We stated the Thursday night at the totally adorable Aimee's flat and watched some Kung Fu Hustle whilst nomnoming on pizza but we were still hungry so a quick trip to tesco and some cheap chicken and cheese later and we were enjoying the finest very quickly made Hunter's Chicken i could manage, it was good.

In the morning we gave Aimee some more cuddles and hung around for a bits before going to pick up Gem from the train station, then driving out and picking up Ursie from her flat.

My car is pretty tiny wee, http://bit.ly/1JSFN7o, the boot was already full so poor Ursie and Gem had to wiggle around in the back playing tetris with bags.
We then had ages, (like two and a bit hours) until Zee-Zee got home so we decided to do something and the thing we decided to do was go to the Stratford Butterfly farm, a place with no evil butterflies and just lots of happy sort of little makingness and it was amazing, the place is beautiful there's so many butterflies inside, there's some scary arachnids and some awesome lizards, we had a reallllllllly long slow wonder around and filled up the SD cards of our phones quite heavily.

We wondered around the riverfront of Stratford and decided on scones, jam and cream for high-tea, it was really amazing with fresh scones that just melted in our mouths.
Ursie then treated us to ice cream, i was kinda expecting tiny teeny ice cream but it was giant and delicious.

Then started the drive up to Belper, it was short but Gem still fell asleep during it of course.
We arrived at Zee-Zee place ahead of time, he lives in a haunted hotel (the ghost makes a buzzing sound, but only during the day and only when people across the street want to get in to the building there.)

I decided i really wanted to be little, or at least try so the moment we got in I got changed into some crinkles and my dashie sleeper, this was pretty nice as it was good to relax after the drive, we ate lots of candy, some pizza was ordered in and there was lots of cuddling, it was really nice, i was pretty exhausted and crawled into the spare bedroom and collapsed asleep.

Saturday, wasn't a great day for me, i woke up with a pounding headache and feeling just terrible all over, i wanted to go off to the caves with everyone else but my body didn't, maybe couldn't even it just wanted to sleep some more.
Having everyone leave kinda did a lot of bad things for me, i started as i often do to retreat inwards, get very insular and overthinking lots, after an 2 hour nap i woke up, needed to get some more water and just changed out of dashie.
In my head, i'd failed already at being little. I should have gone off and had fun with the others.
I slept another 3 hours and woke up feeling still kinda not great, physically and mentally now as everyone came back about half an hour later and i was all in caretaker headspace.

I had lots of fun looking after peoples still, don't think for a moment i didn't really enjoy this trip, i was just dealing emotionally with a lot of things already.
I felt mostly like i'd let down and disappointed my mommy and daddy, so i kept trying to find ways to join in with being little, kept looking for ways to help myself, but i just retreated further away, getting Neko dressed up in my dressy dress so i couldn't locking myself out of that option, sabotaging myself from the conduits i use to get little in the first place.

I still had a super amazing time getting Gem all little, rocking her to sleep for a bit on my lap, cuddling up with Ursie and Zee-Zee.

By bed time i was feeling pretty terrible with myself and when i got to bed i had a bit of a little breakdown. I was supposed to be a puppy and i was being very bad at it, i hadn't joined in anything little at all.

Sunday was betterer, i felt a little more up despite it being the last day, we had decided to go to the Robin Hood festival, i kinda thought it might be a bad idea as it would be horribly busy and should have said more but didn't, the not being little yesterday meant i really wanted to try harder, the drive there was long and there was lots of traffic it took a long time to get to the carpark and it was too expensive, thankfully we found a place just nearby that we could park for free!

We walked up and the festival was super crowded, we found gem, zee-zee and friendly and after walking a bit around found it was just too busy for doing much of anything so we slunk off to a pub which was quiet and really nice, had some super interesting conversations.

Then it was time for heading home, gave zee-zee and friendly lots of hugs and we started to drive back to Coventry, we got talking lots in the car which was really super nice as well, lots of stuff can't talk about but got me kinda excited.

We dropped Gem off at the non-electric electric train museum and waited around a little to make sure she wasn't abducted before dropping Ursie of at her place.

Then it was back to Aimee again for more cuddles.

During the night I really had a proper breakdown, i was on the phone to mommy and daddy for a few hours just crying lots and feeling proper bad about how things had gone.

How i could have done better.

Most of monday was spent travelling back up to Aberdeen, i felt proper bad a few times and we didn't get home until about 1030 when i was feeling really sleepy exhausted.

Back in my own bed, i cried a whole bunch more to mommy and daddy.

But please believe me, I had an amazingly great time, i really enjoyed meeting up with people and it's something i need to do more. Something i want to do more of.

I wish it wasn't so far away from everything, 8 hours of driving didn't help things at all, just leaving me feeling worn and spent.

But it was worth it.

Wanna be a cutey pokemon like

Bulbasaur, Charmeleon or even Zigzagoon

Then you should go enter at http://www.furaffinity.net/journal/6904259/

So I ran out of peoples that completed my previous journal, i'll do the few that didn't complete it correctly as well anyway.

So ... anyone else got some requests?

Rules and Entry Information
- You must be a watcher of my account before I pick a winner
- You must reply to this journal before 11:59pm GMT, 20th August.
- MOST IMPORTANT Include a description or a link to a picture so i know what you want done!
- Whining is totally not allowed. Like ever.

Hey you should all go read the always awesome  kammypup she's looking for a caregiver to fill in a larger role.
You can read all about it at http://www.furaffinity.net/journal/6893513/

 justdoug was one of the most kind hearted and friendly people I ever met on Furrymuck in all my time there.

He will continue to have a lasting and positive impact in the fandom and will be sorely missed.