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Rant - Red Shirts, Revenge, and Bad wRiting
Posted 4 years agoThere's a trend in bad writing I've noticed recently I want to rant about.
It's bad writers having red shirts, minions, mooks, whatever you want to call them, not count as people when it comes to revenge plot or consequences.
It's like they've taken the idea of named enemies and trash mobs from computer games, and applied it to the story.
Most famous is The Last of Us 2. The entire game has Ellie killing her way through hordes of people in order to get revenge, only to spare the villain because killing is wrong. All the people Ellie killed to get to that point don't count, and as far as I know there's no in universe explanation for this.
My uncle was watching some British cop show that was trying desperately to be American (British detectives don't carry guns or get into dramatic shootouts). The bad guy is walking through an abandoned office building gunning down cops with a shotgun like it's a FPS, but when it comes to named characters, he spares them or hesitates long enough for them to escape. I didn't know the details of the plot, but it's hard to claim you're not a cop killer when you're blasting them to death with no hesitation, but they don't have their name in the credits so they don't count.
It's bad writers having red shirts, minions, mooks, whatever you want to call them, not count as people when it comes to revenge plot or consequences.
It's like they've taken the idea of named enemies and trash mobs from computer games, and applied it to the story.
Most famous is The Last of Us 2. The entire game has Ellie killing her way through hordes of people in order to get revenge, only to spare the villain because killing is wrong. All the people Ellie killed to get to that point don't count, and as far as I know there's no in universe explanation for this.
My uncle was watching some British cop show that was trying desperately to be American (British detectives don't carry guns or get into dramatic shootouts). The bad guy is walking through an abandoned office building gunning down cops with a shotgun like it's a FPS, but when it comes to named characters, he spares them or hesitates long enough for them to escape. I didn't know the details of the plot, but it's hard to claim you're not a cop killer when you're blasting them to death with no hesitation, but they don't have their name in the credits so they don't count.
Paw Day 2021 Ideas?
Posted 4 years agoI was told that it's Paw Day on the 20th. That gives me plenty of time to actually make something. What are you more interested in?
-A small game.
When I say a small game, think something that would be on Atari. My concern is that a game would either take too long, or be disappointing.
-Gift art.
Drawings of someone else's OCs. I'm not sure who yet. Maybe Accelo.
-A small game.
When I say a small game, think something that would be on Atari. My concern is that a game would either take too long, or be disappointing.
-Gift art.
Drawings of someone else's OCs. I'm not sure who yet. Maybe Accelo.
Recommend old RPGs
Posted 4 years agoLong story short, I'm getting back into game development by making small, simple games. Pong, Snake, River Raid, that kind of thing.
In a game dev discord, the idea of a simple RPG came up and seemed to get people's interest. When I looked for simple dungeon crawl games torip off use as inspiration, I found all kinds of games from Wizardry to Spelunky.
If you have any suggestions for old or simple turn based RPGs I should look into, let me know.
Also, what kind of things do you like in a dungeon crawl game?
In a game dev discord, the idea of a simple RPG came up and seemed to get people's interest. When I looked for simple dungeon crawl games to
If you have any suggestions for old or simple turn based RPGs I should look into, let me know.
Also, what kind of things do you like in a dungeon crawl game?
PSN Store (PS3, PSP, Vita) Shutting Down
Posted 4 years agoThe PSN shop for the PS3, Vita, and PSP is shutting down at the start of June. Sony claims you'll still be able to download purchased games, and sync your system clock/log in to accounts to authorise downloads, etc. But you won't be able to buy anything, claim download codes, etc.
Basically, you have until June to buy Tokyo Jungle.
Good news for me is that most of the Vita exclusives I've wanted to buy are available on Steam now. Something I didn't know until recently.
A related thing is that the price of physical games has been going up, so if you can't get a physical version for a good price, this might be your last chance to get a digital version at RRP.
If you have any game recommendations, I'd like to hear them.
Basically, you have until June to buy Tokyo Jungle.
Good news for me is that most of the Vita exclusives I've wanted to buy are available on Steam now. Something I didn't know until recently.
A related thing is that the price of physical games has been going up, so if you can't get a physical version for a good price, this might be your last chance to get a digital version at RRP.
If you have any game recommendations, I'd like to hear them.
I'm Back, and I'm 35
Posted 4 years agoI'm back ...kind of.
Long story short, I've not really worked on any of my projects for a while. I'm hoping that's going to change.
I don't know what was using all my time. I think a large part of it was running tabletop RPGs. I used to run 2 a week, and played one. I have since cut back my RPGing. I also have a new chair so my bum doesn't hurt if I use the PC too much.
I'm 35 now. That's too old to feel like I'm not intergreated in the world, unsure of what to do with my life.
Part of me wants to barral forward, making comics, games, videos, and whatever else, even if it's a bad idea. Me putting projects off because I don't think the quality is good enough isn't getting me anywhere. Waiting for that bolt of inspiration, to be "in the right mood" isn't really working either, because those times are fleeting.
Long story short, I've not really worked on any of my projects for a while. I'm hoping that's going to change.
I don't know what was using all my time. I think a large part of it was running tabletop RPGs. I used to run 2 a week, and played one. I have since cut back my RPGing. I also have a new chair so my bum doesn't hurt if I use the PC too much.
I'm 35 now. That's too old to feel like I'm not intergreated in the world, unsure of what to do with my life.
Part of me wants to barral forward, making comics, games, videos, and whatever else, even if it's a bad idea. Me putting projects off because I don't think the quality is good enough isn't getting me anywhere. Waiting for that bolt of inspiration, to be "in the right mood" isn't really working either, because those times are fleeting.
Game Dev and Life Update - Time Too Fast
Posted 5 years agoWith everything going back to normal, it’s time to pick up where I left off.
First, this Vsause video Illusions of Time is a good summary of where my head has been at for the last few weeks, maybe even years.
To steal a quote I heard in a Babylon 5 review, “I’m sick of feeling like I’m rushing through life like I’m late for an appointment.”. I don’t really have any major time sinks or commitments, yet I struggle (and fail) to keep pace with people who have full time jobs, families, etc.
There’s also what I’ve heard called my “adventures arc”, a joking term for me wanting to do things like visit Japan, or buy a motorbike or kei car. These desires are kinda similar to what people going through a mid-life crisis want, but I don’t know if it’s the same.
I’ve noticed that for a lot of people, there’s a lot of wanting something, but never actually doing it despite having the means to do so. Eg. A lot of weebs talk about wanting to visit Japan, but never go through with it. They put it off and put it off until something like Covid comes along and stops their non-existent plans, giving them an excuse to complain.
The blackjack game is technically working. I say technically because it’s too fast. The whole game takes place in a single frame, and trying to slow it down has proven annoying. I don’t know if I’ll stick with it, remake it from scratch, or abandon it and work on something else. I’m leaning towards the latter option.
As before, my main focus atm is on making and finishing smaller games that can be made in a week. I’m thinking about making mods too. Maybe something for New Vegas or Fallout 4.
Enjoy some nostalgia.
First, this Vsause video Illusions of Time is a good summary of where my head has been at for the last few weeks, maybe even years.
To steal a quote I heard in a Babylon 5 review, “I’m sick of feeling like I’m rushing through life like I’m late for an appointment.”. I don’t really have any major time sinks or commitments, yet I struggle (and fail) to keep pace with people who have full time jobs, families, etc.
There’s also what I’ve heard called my “adventures arc”, a joking term for me wanting to do things like visit Japan, or buy a motorbike or kei car. These desires are kinda similar to what people going through a mid-life crisis want, but I don’t know if it’s the same.
I’ve noticed that for a lot of people, there’s a lot of wanting something, but never actually doing it despite having the means to do so. Eg. A lot of weebs talk about wanting to visit Japan, but never go through with it. They put it off and put it off until something like Covid comes along and stops their non-existent plans, giving them an excuse to complain.
The blackjack game is technically working. I say technically because it’s too fast. The whole game takes place in a single frame, and trying to slow it down has proven annoying. I don’t know if I’ll stick with it, remake it from scratch, or abandon it and work on something else. I’m leaning towards the latter option.
As before, my main focus atm is on making and finishing smaller games that can be made in a week. I’m thinking about making mods too. Maybe something for New Vegas or Fallout 4.
Enjoy some nostalgia.
Film Review - The Harry Hill Movie
Posted 5 years agoI want to say “Harry Hill needs no introduction”, but he does because some people haven’t heard of this national treasure beyond his use as a meme by RTGame.
Harry Hill is a comedian. While I’m not a fan of his comedy style most of the time, but he is responsible for Harry Hill’s TV Burp, the funniest TV program ever made. It’s hard to explain the appeal of TV Burp due to the jokes being so visual. It’s not really the kind of show you can have on in the background. Also, he’s an amateur artist who said in an interview that he has trouble painting horses, which as a shit tier artist myself, I can relate to.
So it pains me to say that the Harry Hill Movie is very hit and miss, ranging from laugh out loud funny, to the worst kind of filler.
The plot is that Harry’s hamster is sick. Given a week to live, they decide to take him to Blackpool tower. Meanwhile, Harry’s evil twin brother and his two henchmen are trying to kidnap the hamster.
As with TV Burp, it’s hard to show you a single clip to prove that the film is funny, since so many of the jokes require set up, are visual, or are generally subtle. One of the few examples I can give is when the henchmen are talking about the villains they’ve worked for. People like Scaramanga, Lex Luthor, and Tony Blair. Another highlight is the song trying to portray Blackpool as some glamorous dream destination. There’s also some easy to miss details, like when you see Stoofer when one of the characters is browsing FaceBook.
The cast is well done too. It’s a who’s who of British comedians. You have Harry Hill, obviously. Matt Lucas, Johny Vegas, and Julie Walters all doing well in their roles. If there was a scene with a pub, I’m sure Al Murry would’ve been there.
One strange thing is how some scenes seem unusually expensive and out of place. Most obvious is a scene where the hamster turns giant, terrorises a town while shooting nuclear rays from its eyes, before being suppressed by the army and returning to normal. It’s large in scope and budget, isn’t very funny, is out of place, and has no impact on the story. The cynic in me says it’s there either as a studio mandate, or to have something for the trailer. This is made even more confusing because the ending feels shoddy and rushed.
Unfortunately, the film is dragged down by the singing. It’s almost a musical with the amount of songs. The previously mentioned Blackpool song is fantastic, and the song about bed and breakfasts is okay I guess, but all the rest is pure, uncut, 48 carat filler. There’s a band I’ve never heard of called the Magic Numbers that cameo a few times in the film, serving no purpose other than a name drop, and most of the songs have little humour to them and don’t really advance the plot.
It pains me to say it, but it’s difficult for me to recommend The Harry Hill Movie to anyone. What's good is great, but the filler makes it difficult to sit through. A good editor could likely get this film down to about 50 minutes of pure gold, but as it is now, it’s a 90 minute mixed bag.
(If you want to see what TV Burp is like, here's part of a random episode I found on YouTube)
https://youtu.be/_knkaMT85sg
Harry Hill is a comedian. While I’m not a fan of his comedy style most of the time, but he is responsible for Harry Hill’s TV Burp, the funniest TV program ever made. It’s hard to explain the appeal of TV Burp due to the jokes being so visual. It’s not really the kind of show you can have on in the background. Also, he’s an amateur artist who said in an interview that he has trouble painting horses, which as a shit tier artist myself, I can relate to.
So it pains me to say that the Harry Hill Movie is very hit and miss, ranging from laugh out loud funny, to the worst kind of filler.
The plot is that Harry’s hamster is sick. Given a week to live, they decide to take him to Blackpool tower. Meanwhile, Harry’s evil twin brother and his two henchmen are trying to kidnap the hamster.
As with TV Burp, it’s hard to show you a single clip to prove that the film is funny, since so many of the jokes require set up, are visual, or are generally subtle. One of the few examples I can give is when the henchmen are talking about the villains they’ve worked for. People like Scaramanga, Lex Luthor, and Tony Blair. Another highlight is the song trying to portray Blackpool as some glamorous dream destination. There’s also some easy to miss details, like when you see Stoofer when one of the characters is browsing FaceBook.
The cast is well done too. It’s a who’s who of British comedians. You have Harry Hill, obviously. Matt Lucas, Johny Vegas, and Julie Walters all doing well in their roles. If there was a scene with a pub, I’m sure Al Murry would’ve been there.
One strange thing is how some scenes seem unusually expensive and out of place. Most obvious is a scene where the hamster turns giant, terrorises a town while shooting nuclear rays from its eyes, before being suppressed by the army and returning to normal. It’s large in scope and budget, isn’t very funny, is out of place, and has no impact on the story. The cynic in me says it’s there either as a studio mandate, or to have something for the trailer. This is made even more confusing because the ending feels shoddy and rushed.
Unfortunately, the film is dragged down by the singing. It’s almost a musical with the amount of songs. The previously mentioned Blackpool song is fantastic, and the song about bed and breakfasts is okay I guess, but all the rest is pure, uncut, 48 carat filler. There’s a band I’ve never heard of called the Magic Numbers that cameo a few times in the film, serving no purpose other than a name drop, and most of the songs have little humour to them and don’t really advance the plot.
It pains me to say it, but it’s difficult for me to recommend The Harry Hill Movie to anyone. What's good is great, but the filler makes it difficult to sit through. A good editor could likely get this film down to about 50 minutes of pure gold, but as it is now, it’s a 90 minute mixed bag.
(If you want to see what TV Burp is like, here's part of a random episode I found on YouTube)
https://youtu.be/_knkaMT85sg
Film Review - Cobra
Posted 5 years agoReview written in the first week of January, but the film was watched Christmas day.
When I reviewed Invasion USA, I complained that there wasn’t much Christmas in it. Little did I know that it was a bounty of Christmas compared to Cobra. So let’s get this out of the way first. There’s some decorations in a shop, a Toys R Us ad on TV that I’m sure is nostalgic to someone, and a man in a Santa outfit dives out the way during a car chase. This feels less like a Christmas film, and more a film that happened to be filmed in early December. As such, this is only a Christmas film by technicality. Maybe that’s enough, I don’t know.
Anyway, the plot.
The film opens reading off crime statistics in a way that reminds me of Tank Police. Then we get an action scene where the titular hero saves a shop from a mass shooter.
The actual plot is a string of murders in the city. The eggheads have no idea who’s doing this and why, so the reluctantly allow Cobra to help.
Meanwhile, a woman drives by what she thinks is a broken down car, when in fact it’s one of the murders in progress. Having seen the face of one of the killers. The killers are a mad cult that likes hanging out in an abandoned warehouse banging axes together. Don’t judge, everyone needs a hobby.
The rest of the film is basically a Terminator esc escort quest, only it’s a sunglasses wearing cop vs a cult instead of future man vs a robot. The woman uses a good deal of common sense and actually listens to advice from Cobra. I struggle to think to think of anyone that acts particularly stupid throughout the film.
The only part I didn’t much care for was a scene at the end where it takes a sharp turn into social commentary and fails, trying to make a point about how bad guys get arrested then immediately released, before killing the villain in over the top action movie fashion.
When I started watching this film, people were saying it’s a bad film, but I liked it unironically. It’s a decent action film. It’s well paced, the action is good, and it has the budget to do the plot justice. Whereas Invasion USA felt off, Cobra delivers the action goods.
When I reviewed Invasion USA, I complained that there wasn’t much Christmas in it. Little did I know that it was a bounty of Christmas compared to Cobra. So let’s get this out of the way first. There’s some decorations in a shop, a Toys R Us ad on TV that I’m sure is nostalgic to someone, and a man in a Santa outfit dives out the way during a car chase. This feels less like a Christmas film, and more a film that happened to be filmed in early December. As such, this is only a Christmas film by technicality. Maybe that’s enough, I don’t know.
Anyway, the plot.
The film opens reading off crime statistics in a way that reminds me of Tank Police. Then we get an action scene where the titular hero saves a shop from a mass shooter.
The actual plot is a string of murders in the city. The eggheads have no idea who’s doing this and why, so the reluctantly allow Cobra to help.
Meanwhile, a woman drives by what she thinks is a broken down car, when in fact it’s one of the murders in progress. Having seen the face of one of the killers. The killers are a mad cult that likes hanging out in an abandoned warehouse banging axes together. Don’t judge, everyone needs a hobby.
The rest of the film is basically a Terminator esc escort quest, only it’s a sunglasses wearing cop vs a cult instead of future man vs a robot. The woman uses a good deal of common sense and actually listens to advice from Cobra. I struggle to think to think of anyone that acts particularly stupid throughout the film.
The only part I didn’t much care for was a scene at the end where it takes a sharp turn into social commentary and fails, trying to make a point about how bad guys get arrested then immediately released, before killing the villain in over the top action movie fashion.
When I started watching this film, people were saying it’s a bad film, but I liked it unironically. It’s a decent action film. It’s well paced, the action is good, and it has the budget to do the plot justice. Whereas Invasion USA felt off, Cobra delivers the action goods.
Film Review - Invasion USA
Posted 5 years agoDie Hard is the best Christmas film, but recently I've gotten bored of it. It's been more than 20 years after all. Then I heard of Invasion USA; an 80s action film set during Christmas.
Invasion USA is bad movie, but fun bad, the kind of bad that would be fun to riff with friends if I had any.
The plot is bad guys want to spread terror throughout the United States because they're bad guys. To say the villains motivations are thin would be a lie, because that would imply they have a motivation.
The bad guys start by trying to kill Chuck Norris by blowing up his shack in a swamp. They fail, but do manage to kill his friend. From there, large boats arrive on a beach carrying an army of terrorists so generic it's like they're from a game. It's guys in army boots with various kinds of hats. Berets, flat caps, beanies, fishing hats. They really could be anything.
Most of the film follows a simple pattern. Bad guys have an evil plot, like blowing up a bus full of children, or blowing up a crowded shopping mall, and Chuck Norris arrives just after the attack starts to stop the bad guys.
Most of the film is well done. The action is fun, and I like some of the details like Chuck's truck gradually becoming more damaged over time, and I can overlook things like every interiour from an office building to a shopping mall being made of painted plywood. And like other action b-movies of this era, I like the sense of scale. Dozens if not hundereds of extras running through the streets firing guns in all directions, before being knocked over like skittles by an explosion, all with zero CGI or shakeycam. The film also has a little humour, like a terrorist leaving behind a bomb disguised as a bag of gifts, only to have a good samaritan try to return it to him.
The flaw of the film is in the execution overall. The baddies have no motivation, there's a sub plot with a reporter that adds nothing and goes nowhere, and there's only a few one-liners in the entire film, and only one is memorable. "Come back in here and I'll give you so many rights you'll beg for a left."
Oh, and it being Christmas happens to be incidental and only really appears in two scenes. The shopping mall scene, and the naibourhood scene.
It has it's moments, like the gunfight in the mall and the audacity of the villains plans, but it's a little slow to get started and lacks a certain something to make it more than the sum of its parts.
Invasion USA is bad movie, but fun bad, the kind of bad that would be fun to riff with friends if I had any.
The plot is bad guys want to spread terror throughout the United States because they're bad guys. To say the villains motivations are thin would be a lie, because that would imply they have a motivation.
The bad guys start by trying to kill Chuck Norris by blowing up his shack in a swamp. They fail, but do manage to kill his friend. From there, large boats arrive on a beach carrying an army of terrorists so generic it's like they're from a game. It's guys in army boots with various kinds of hats. Berets, flat caps, beanies, fishing hats. They really could be anything.
Most of the film follows a simple pattern. Bad guys have an evil plot, like blowing up a bus full of children, or blowing up a crowded shopping mall, and Chuck Norris arrives just after the attack starts to stop the bad guys.
Most of the film is well done. The action is fun, and I like some of the details like Chuck's truck gradually becoming more damaged over time, and I can overlook things like every interiour from an office building to a shopping mall being made of painted plywood. And like other action b-movies of this era, I like the sense of scale. Dozens if not hundereds of extras running through the streets firing guns in all directions, before being knocked over like skittles by an explosion, all with zero CGI or shakeycam. The film also has a little humour, like a terrorist leaving behind a bomb disguised as a bag of gifts, only to have a good samaritan try to return it to him.
The flaw of the film is in the execution overall. The baddies have no motivation, there's a sub plot with a reporter that adds nothing and goes nowhere, and there's only a few one-liners in the entire film, and only one is memorable. "Come back in here and I'll give you so many rights you'll beg for a left."
Oh, and it being Christmas happens to be incidental and only really appears in two scenes. The shopping mall scene, and the naibourhood scene.
It has it's moments, like the gunfight in the mall and the audacity of the villains plans, but it's a little slow to get started and lacks a certain something to make it more than the sum of its parts.
Christmas music/films/games/videos for your playlist
Posted 5 years ago-Music-
Merry Christmas Everybody - Slade
Arguably the best Christmas song when it comes to capturing the feeling of the holiday. All without the usual slay bells cliche. It’s not unusual to hear this on TV adverts or playing in shops here in blighty, but I rarely hear it in art streams or other people’s playlist. I want that fixed.
https://youtu.be/i4BTYiy0Qi4
Little Drummer Boy
One of those songs you’ve likely heard but never sought out. It’s been covered by many people, none of which you’ve heard of. (There aren’t many fans of the music of ...the Norwegian University of Science and Technology, or "Boney M." for example) It’s most recognisable for the “Pa rum pum pum pum” lyric that repeats throughout.
https://youtu.be/3sKmHiGOv70
Christmas Time in Dun Morogh - Pure Pwnage
A World of Warcraft themed Christmas song from 2007. Even though I never played the game, the song has a lot of nostalgia for me.
https://youtu.be/0jmdBA9nK0c
-Films-
Various Action Movies That Aren’t Die Hard
Everybody knows that Die Hard is the best Christmas movie ever made. I could’ve sworn that 15-20 years ago you’d be considered a bit of a weirdo for saying that. I don’t know if it’s the Mandela Effect or what. These days I’m a little bit sick of it, seeing it once a year. But there are other action movies set during Christmas that I’ve either never seen, or haven’t seen in years. These include-
Die Hard 2
Batman Returns
Invasion USA
Cobra
Those last two I plan to watch this year. I’d wait and give you a proper review, but Christmas will likely be over by then.
The Ref
Introduced to me by Tierafoxglove The Ref is a very relatable Christmas comedy, and it’s really good. Dennis Leary plays a petty thief who, after a robbery goes bad, has to lay low with a family he’s taken hostage. The family is a dysfunctional mess, and Leary (posing as the marriage counselor) has to act as the titular referee for their increasingly petty and deranged arguments. It’s a great film, well worth seeing if you can find it.
-Games-
Die Hard Trilogy (PS1)
I’ve never played Nakatomi Plaza, and the NES Die Hard game isn’t very good (though it was ambitious for it’s day). But Die Hard Trilogy on PS1 holds up, or at least holds up as well as you can expect for an early PS1 game. Lot’s of nostalgia for this one.
Toy Commander Christmas (Dreamcast)
I remember playing Toy Commander at the local Blockbuster, and it made me want a Dreamcast, turning me into “that guy” that laments the death of the Dreamcast. The official Dreamcast magazine had a demo disc that featured a special Christmas level of Toy Commander (not in the full game) where you have to help a tiny jetpack wearing Santa retrieve presents.
-Internet Video-
LGR Christmas
Does Lazy Game Reviews need any introduction? Their series of Christmas videos is good.
https://youtube.com/playlist?list=P.....E2E211BDA217EF
If the full playlist is to much, Prezzie Hunt and Nutcracker are two great episodes.
AVGN Christmas
Was thinking about not including this one since the Christmas episodes aren’t his best, but James Rofle clearly puts a lot of effort into his Christmas episodes. Whether it’s an advent calendar like series going through viewer requests, or his take on a Christmas Carol (complete with old ScrewAttack staff before the split), they’re something that spring to mind when thinking about internet YouTube.
That’s all I have. Please add any you like in the comments. And Merry Christmas. ^_^
Merry Christmas Everybody - Slade
Arguably the best Christmas song when it comes to capturing the feeling of the holiday. All without the usual slay bells cliche. It’s not unusual to hear this on TV adverts or playing in shops here in blighty, but I rarely hear it in art streams or other people’s playlist. I want that fixed.
https://youtu.be/i4BTYiy0Qi4
Little Drummer Boy
One of those songs you’ve likely heard but never sought out. It’s been covered by many people, none of which you’ve heard of. (There aren’t many fans of the music of ...the Norwegian University of Science and Technology, or "Boney M." for example) It’s most recognisable for the “Pa rum pum pum pum” lyric that repeats throughout.
https://youtu.be/3sKmHiGOv70
Christmas Time in Dun Morogh - Pure Pwnage
A World of Warcraft themed Christmas song from 2007. Even though I never played the game, the song has a lot of nostalgia for me.
https://youtu.be/0jmdBA9nK0c
-Films-
Various Action Movies That Aren’t Die Hard
Everybody knows that Die Hard is the best Christmas movie ever made. I could’ve sworn that 15-20 years ago you’d be considered a bit of a weirdo for saying that. I don’t know if it’s the Mandela Effect or what. These days I’m a little bit sick of it, seeing it once a year. But there are other action movies set during Christmas that I’ve either never seen, or haven’t seen in years. These include-
Die Hard 2
Batman Returns
Invasion USA
Cobra
Those last two I plan to watch this year. I’d wait and give you a proper review, but Christmas will likely be over by then.
The Ref
Introduced to me by Tierafoxglove The Ref is a very relatable Christmas comedy, and it’s really good. Dennis Leary plays a petty thief who, after a robbery goes bad, has to lay low with a family he’s taken hostage. The family is a dysfunctional mess, and Leary (posing as the marriage counselor) has to act as the titular referee for their increasingly petty and deranged arguments. It’s a great film, well worth seeing if you can find it.
-Games-
Die Hard Trilogy (PS1)
I’ve never played Nakatomi Plaza, and the NES Die Hard game isn’t very good (though it was ambitious for it’s day). But Die Hard Trilogy on PS1 holds up, or at least holds up as well as you can expect for an early PS1 game. Lot’s of nostalgia for this one.
Toy Commander Christmas (Dreamcast)
I remember playing Toy Commander at the local Blockbuster, and it made me want a Dreamcast, turning me into “that guy” that laments the death of the Dreamcast. The official Dreamcast magazine had a demo disc that featured a special Christmas level of Toy Commander (not in the full game) where you have to help a tiny jetpack wearing Santa retrieve presents.
-Internet Video-
LGR Christmas
Does Lazy Game Reviews need any introduction? Their series of Christmas videos is good.
https://youtube.com/playlist?list=P.....E2E211BDA217EF
If the full playlist is to much, Prezzie Hunt and Nutcracker are two great episodes.
AVGN Christmas
Was thinking about not including this one since the Christmas episodes aren’t his best, but James Rofle clearly puts a lot of effort into his Christmas episodes. Whether it’s an advent calendar like series going through viewer requests, or his take on a Christmas Carol (complete with old ScrewAttack staff before the split), they’re something that spring to mind when thinking about internet YouTube.
That’s all I have. Please add any you like in the comments. And Merry Christmas. ^_^
Will the porn purge come to DA/FA?
Posted 5 years agoMany moons ago, Tumblr died when they banned porn from the site.
A few days ago, PornHub deleted 6-10 million videos. Basically anything that wasn't from a "verified" account.
Today, I heard that Clips4Sale got rid of various fetishes.
I've heard various theories as to why this is happening. The two most believable to me are
-An ad-pocolypse style moral panic
-Visa and Mastercard are throwing their weight around again.
Question is, will Fur Affinity, Deviant Art, or other sites follow suit?
Edit- GumRoad might not be supporting PayPal after January 1st.
A few days ago, PornHub deleted 6-10 million videos. Basically anything that wasn't from a "verified" account.
Today, I heard that Clips4Sale got rid of various fetishes.
I've heard various theories as to why this is happening. The two most believable to me are
-An ad-pocolypse style moral panic
-Visa and Mastercard are throwing their weight around again.
Question is, will Fur Affinity, Deviant Art, or other sites follow suit?
Edit- GumRoad might not be supporting PayPal after January 1st.
Film Review - The Ninth Gate
Posted 5 years agoNot from the DVD motherload I posted about previously, but shown on TV. Convenient for me since I was wanting to see this for a while.
The Ninth Gate was sold to me as one of the real Cthulhu films. While it might not have the monsters or the names, I was told follows similar themes and concepts and does them well. I kind of agree with that. It does the job, and is worth your time, but not worth seeking out specifically.
-Plot-
The film opens with an old man killing himself. Lovely. The rest follows Johny Depp, an unscrupulous book dealer who is hired by a rich, eccentric collector of satanic literature. He hires Depp to confirm his copy of a particular book is genuine. The book is said to contain the ritual to summon the devil.
This quest takes Depp across America and Europe. Along the way he’s followed by strange people and weird occurrences.
It’s all fairly subtle stuff, and well edited. The film never drags, even though most of the run time is just people sitting around talking about books. I wasn’t surprised to learn that this was based on a book, because the film isn’t very visual.
But this also reduces the re-watchability of it I think. It’s essentially a mystery story, so once you know the plot, there’s not really much reason to go back to it. Still, as a one time watch, it’s entertaining enough.
-Other stuff-
There’s no real bad effects to speak of. Maybe you can spot some blue screen here and there if you’re looking, but nothing really stands out. Even at the end when things get crazy, it’s all fairly low key. There’s no giant CGI monsters or jump scares or anything like that.
The film also has enough budget to do the story justice. Locations seem real, not sets, and if they were I never really noticed. Things are spelled out enough for me to follow the plot without boring exposition dumps or vague confusion. Characters generally act in a logical manner, with reasonable motives and minimal stupidity.
I know I’m sounding very nuts and bolts, but that’s the thing. It’s all well put together, while being low key and subtle without being boring. This isn’t the kind of “fun” film where the hero fights cgi monsters. If anything, Depp’s character is useless in combat.
-Overall-
I liked The Ninth Gate. It’s not a film I could watch repeatedly because so much of it is just people sitting around talking about books, trying to solve a mystery that is all tied up by the end.
Is it the quintessential Lovecraft film? I wouldn’t say so, but I can understand why people would say that. It’s arguably the best so far overall. It doesn’t fall to pieces like The Devil Rides Out, and is generally competent throughout while capturing the general theme and atmosphere.
Worth your time, but maybe not worth the effort of seeking out.
The Ninth Gate was sold to me as one of the real Cthulhu films. While it might not have the monsters or the names, I was told follows similar themes and concepts and does them well. I kind of agree with that. It does the job, and is worth your time, but not worth seeking out specifically.
-Plot-
The film opens with an old man killing himself. Lovely. The rest follows Johny Depp, an unscrupulous book dealer who is hired by a rich, eccentric collector of satanic literature. He hires Depp to confirm his copy of a particular book is genuine. The book is said to contain the ritual to summon the devil.
This quest takes Depp across America and Europe. Along the way he’s followed by strange people and weird occurrences.
It’s all fairly subtle stuff, and well edited. The film never drags, even though most of the run time is just people sitting around talking about books. I wasn’t surprised to learn that this was based on a book, because the film isn’t very visual.
But this also reduces the re-watchability of it I think. It’s essentially a mystery story, so once you know the plot, there’s not really much reason to go back to it. Still, as a one time watch, it’s entertaining enough.
-Other stuff-
There’s no real bad effects to speak of. Maybe you can spot some blue screen here and there if you’re looking, but nothing really stands out. Even at the end when things get crazy, it’s all fairly low key. There’s no giant CGI monsters or jump scares or anything like that.
The film also has enough budget to do the story justice. Locations seem real, not sets, and if they were I never really noticed. Things are spelled out enough for me to follow the plot without boring exposition dumps or vague confusion. Characters generally act in a logical manner, with reasonable motives and minimal stupidity.
I know I’m sounding very nuts and bolts, but that’s the thing. It’s all well put together, while being low key and subtle without being boring. This isn’t the kind of “fun” film where the hero fights cgi monsters. If anything, Depp’s character is useless in combat.
-Overall-
I liked The Ninth Gate. It’s not a film I could watch repeatedly because so much of it is just people sitting around talking about books, trying to solve a mystery that is all tied up by the end.
Is it the quintessential Lovecraft film? I wouldn’t say so, but I can understand why people would say that. It’s arguably the best so far overall. It doesn’t fall to pieces like The Devil Rides Out, and is generally competent throughout while capturing the general theme and atmosphere.
Worth your time, but maybe not worth the effort of seeking out.
DVD Mother-load
Posted 5 years agoGood news for those who read my film/TV reviews. All one of you. My family was recently gifted a whole DVD collection.
An old woman we have no connection too died. I don't know how she died, or even what her name was. All I know is she was basically house bound in her later years, spending her time watching DVDs. She amassed a large collection that no one else wanted, so we ended up with it.
For those who care, the connection goes like this. In reverse order.
Me < my dad < dad's friend < friend's coworker < coworker's aunt.
It was coworker's aunt that passed.
The collection was a large mix of stuff. From Die Hard, to Downton Abbey. It's too much for even my hoarder parents to keep, so we took what was interesting and passed the rest onto neighbours, who will likely do the same.
I won't go into everything, but I these are the highlights-
A Man of All Seasons
Casablanca
Clash of the Titans and Sinbad 1-3
Die Hard 2-5 (I own Die Hard 1 already)
Indiana Jones 1-4
MacGyver (the original series and TV movies)
National Treasure 1 and 2
Ten Commandments
Warehouse 13 1-5 (Yes, I've been told about the stockings episode. I've not seen that episode yet.)
Who Framed Roger Rabbit
Some films I didn't pick up due to limited space include-
Executive Decision
The Graduate
Night at the Museum 1-5
The Taking of Pellem 123
If you think I should grab those, let me know asap and I might be able to grab them before the collection is passed on to people I don't know.
Oh, and this collection came the same day (or the day after) I ordered Invasion USA and a Stallone collection (mainly for Cobra). So I see lots of film reviews next year.
Related, I'm considering doing video reviews, basically read aloud versions of the text reviews, if anyone is interested.
An old woman we have no connection too died. I don't know how she died, or even what her name was. All I know is she was basically house bound in her later years, spending her time watching DVDs. She amassed a large collection that no one else wanted, so we ended up with it.
For those who care, the connection goes like this. In reverse order.
Me < my dad < dad's friend < friend's coworker < coworker's aunt.
It was coworker's aunt that passed.
The collection was a large mix of stuff. From Die Hard, to Downton Abbey. It's too much for even my hoarder parents to keep, so we took what was interesting and passed the rest onto neighbours, who will likely do the same.
I won't go into everything, but I these are the highlights-
A Man of All Seasons
Casablanca
Clash of the Titans and Sinbad 1-3
Die Hard 2-5 (I own Die Hard 1 already)
Indiana Jones 1-4
MacGyver (the original series and TV movies)
National Treasure 1 and 2
Ten Commandments
Warehouse 13 1-5 (Yes, I've been told about the stockings episode. I've not seen that episode yet.)
Who Framed Roger Rabbit
Some films I didn't pick up due to limited space include-
Executive Decision
The Graduate
Night at the Museum 1-5
The Taking of Pellem 123
If you think I should grab those, let me know asap and I might be able to grab them before the collection is passed on to people I don't know.
Oh, and this collection came the same day (or the day after) I ordered Invasion USA and a Stallone collection (mainly for Cobra). So I see lots of film reviews next year.
Related, I'm considering doing video reviews, basically read aloud versions of the text reviews, if anyone is interested.
Game Dev - Strip Blackjack (artists welcome)
Posted 5 years agoTL:DR - I want opinions on a strip poker esc blackjack game. If you want to draw characters for the game, let me know.
I mentioned a few game ideas I had for a quick game dev project. I think the bike game will be the one I'll go for. I'm torn between having a punching focus, or a shooting focus. Ideally, I'd do both, but for now I'm leaning towards punching.
I asked an artist about the ladder game, and they agreed to draw sprites for the game. Unfortunately, the project immediately got a bad case of feature creep, with larger, more colourful sprites, more animations, and features like stealing shoes from enemies. I'm still fine with making the game, but the scope has increased beyond the small game I had in mind.
Which brings me the topic of this journal. Today I had the idea for a strip blackjack game. Why blackjack? I'm not a fan of poker. Art for the cards is freely available online, leaving just the pin ups. Anyone who wants to contribute art would be welcome to.
AI for each character would be easy. Just set a number for each character to stick at.
There would be two modes of play. Lives, where you have a certain number of losses before you get a game over, and "real" mode, where you can strip in real life and tell the game when you're done, or you can just lie for infinite lives.
In order to add a more "videogamey" element to the game (and reduce random chance), at the start you can pick a gadget that allows you to cheat in certain ways. Ideas I have include-
-A card counter that tells you what cards are left in the deck.
-A mind reader that tells you what number they stick at.
-Auto peek that shows the first card they drew.
-Manual peek that shows all their cards, but over use it and you'll get caught.
-Pair of scissors for one free clothes removal.
-And of course, no gadget.
Features I'd like to add if I have time.
-Character dialogue.
-More assertive characters will allow you to regain lives in exchange for a dare of some sort.
-Shy characters will plead for do-overs when they're losing.
-Outfit picker with multiple outfits per character.
-Quick play mode where you choose a character to play against, or a campaign mode where you play multiple characters in a row.
-Fetish picker to tailor content to the player.
-Multiple characters in a single game.
-Different backgrounds and locations.
Let me know what you think, and if you have any interest in contributing.
I mentioned a few game ideas I had for a quick game dev project. I think the bike game will be the one I'll go for. I'm torn between having a punching focus, or a shooting focus. Ideally, I'd do both, but for now I'm leaning towards punching.
I asked an artist about the ladder game, and they agreed to draw sprites for the game. Unfortunately, the project immediately got a bad case of feature creep, with larger, more colourful sprites, more animations, and features like stealing shoes from enemies. I'm still fine with making the game, but the scope has increased beyond the small game I had in mind.
Which brings me the topic of this journal. Today I had the idea for a strip blackjack game. Why blackjack? I'm not a fan of poker. Art for the cards is freely available online, leaving just the pin ups. Anyone who wants to contribute art would be welcome to.
AI for each character would be easy. Just set a number for each character to stick at.
There would be two modes of play. Lives, where you have a certain number of losses before you get a game over, and "real" mode, where you can strip in real life and tell the game when you're done, or you can just lie for infinite lives.
In order to add a more "videogamey" element to the game (and reduce random chance), at the start you can pick a gadget that allows you to cheat in certain ways. Ideas I have include-
-A card counter that tells you what cards are left in the deck.
-A mind reader that tells you what number they stick at.
-Auto peek that shows the first card they drew.
-Manual peek that shows all their cards, but over use it and you'll get caught.
-Pair of scissors for one free clothes removal.
-And of course, no gadget.
Features I'd like to add if I have time.
-Character dialogue.
-More assertive characters will allow you to regain lives in exchange for a dare of some sort.
-Shy characters will plead for do-overs when they're losing.
-Outfit picker with multiple outfits per character.
-Quick play mode where you choose a character to play against, or a campaign mode where you play multiple characters in a row.
-Fetish picker to tailor content to the player.
-Multiple characters in a single game.
-Different backgrounds and locations.
Let me know what you think, and if you have any interest in contributing.
Game Dev - November Quick Game Ideas/Vote
Posted 5 years agoThis month, I want to make a small game in 24 hours. Nothing complex, and I don't expect anyone to actually play it, but I thought I'd pitch my ideas here, see what people actually want. Most of these are clones of simple games, with primitive graphics and sound.
1- Car/Bike Combat Game - A simple, virtuical scrolling shooter, but you play as a car or bike instead of a space ship. The car or bike would have guns, and you'd dodge obsticals, collect items, and kill enemies. Based on games like River Raid and Spy Hunter.
2- Ladder Game - One of those old style platform games where you couldn't jump, like Chuckie Egg or Booty. Ideally I would add a fast forward button to reduce waiting, but even without that, it shouldn't be difficult to make. I'm considering making this a fanservice. You'd be in your underwear trying to collect clothes without being grabbed.
3- Platformer - A pitfall clone where you move from left to right, avoiding obstetrical, collecting treasure, and saving damsels. No need to spend weeks working on refined platforming physics. It would be loosely based on old adventure themed commissions I got.
https://www.deviantart.com/toughset.....abre-270954771
https://www.furaffinity.net/view/18554215/
https://www.furaffinity.net/view/20210705/
4- Stealth Game - In keeping with my tendency to be inspired by bad media, on a discord server someone showed off a porn game that was barely functional. The bad guys moves from right to left in the background, and you had to move between safe zones to avoid capture. The creator is getting $240 a month on Patreon for it. I think I could make a functionally similar game in 24 hours. I'd likely have the plot be similar to the ladder game in that you're trying to escape somewhere without being spotted.
Thoughts, ideas, and suggestions all welcome.
1- Car/Bike Combat Game - A simple, virtuical scrolling shooter, but you play as a car or bike instead of a space ship. The car or bike would have guns, and you'd dodge obsticals, collect items, and kill enemies. Based on games like River Raid and Spy Hunter.
2- Ladder Game - One of those old style platform games where you couldn't jump, like Chuckie Egg or Booty. Ideally I would add a fast forward button to reduce waiting, but even without that, it shouldn't be difficult to make. I'm considering making this a fanservice. You'd be in your underwear trying to collect clothes without being grabbed.
3- Platformer - A pitfall clone where you move from left to right, avoiding obstetrical, collecting treasure, and saving damsels. No need to spend weeks working on refined platforming physics. It would be loosely based on old adventure themed commissions I got.
https://www.deviantart.com/toughset.....abre-270954771
https://www.furaffinity.net/view/18554215/
https://www.furaffinity.net/view/20210705/
4- Stealth Game - In keeping with my tendency to be inspired by bad media, on a discord server someone showed off a porn game that was barely functional. The bad guys moves from right to left in the background, and you had to move between safe zones to avoid capture. The creator is getting $240 a month on Patreon for it. I think I could make a functionally similar game in 24 hours. I'd likely have the plot be similar to the ladder game in that you're trying to escape somewhere without being spotted.
Thoughts, ideas, and suggestions all welcome.
Anime Review - Ghost in the Shell 2045 (The first 2 eps)
Posted 5 years agoGhost in the Shell, a classic cyberpunk manga and anime. I'd heard nothing but bad things about the new series, Ghost in the Shell 2045, but I was craving some cyberpunk so I gave it a shot. Computer animation doesn't bother me, and I've seen shows that espouse different political opinions from mine. Plus, any left-right divide could be hand waved as the left-right of the 80s and 90s, not the modern sense of Trump vs SJW.
I was wrong. The two episodes were not only bad, but hard to watch, with modern politics forced into it so much that everything around it breaks.
How bad is it? Well, at the end of the first action scene, one of the terrorists screams "Death to the one percent!".
See, the shows premise is that in 2044, the debt record was wiped, causing all kinds of social strife and leading to wars. Now the 1% has built a wall with poor people on the outside and rich people on the inside.
At least one of the terrorists is revealed to be a college football star who's drowning in student debt, after the debt record was wiped, he turned to terrorism to let off his excess testosterone. The characters literally say this. It makes no sense. It makes negative sense. If you're up to your eyeballs in debt, and the debt record is wiped, wouldn't that mean you're a football star with no debt?
In the next episode, the tank gunner can't penetrate the characters plot armour, and this is blamed on him playing too many video games.
This writing even effects the action and plot too. As mentioned, the main characters have plot armour so thick that other characters comment on it. One character is hit by a hellfire missile and presumed dead, but no one except the diversity character buys it. One of them even comments that if it were the diversity character, he'd be dead, but since the guy hit was a main character he'll be fine.
Most problems aren't solved with skill or ingenuity, but by leaning on plot armour as hard as possible. Like the previously mentioned tank fight where the hero doesn't get hit because the gunner is a bad shot.
I don't know if I'll keep watching the show. If I do, I might do a second review of the series as a whole.
I was wrong. The two episodes were not only bad, but hard to watch, with modern politics forced into it so much that everything around it breaks.
How bad is it? Well, at the end of the first action scene, one of the terrorists screams "Death to the one percent!".
See, the shows premise is that in 2044, the debt record was wiped, causing all kinds of social strife and leading to wars. Now the 1% has built a wall with poor people on the outside and rich people on the inside.
At least one of the terrorists is revealed to be a college football star who's drowning in student debt, after the debt record was wiped, he turned to terrorism to let off his excess testosterone. The characters literally say this. It makes no sense. It makes negative sense. If you're up to your eyeballs in debt, and the debt record is wiped, wouldn't that mean you're a football star with no debt?
In the next episode, the tank gunner can't penetrate the characters plot armour, and this is blamed on him playing too many video games.
This writing even effects the action and plot too. As mentioned, the main characters have plot armour so thick that other characters comment on it. One character is hit by a hellfire missile and presumed dead, but no one except the diversity character buys it. One of them even comments that if it were the diversity character, he'd be dead, but since the guy hit was a main character he'll be fine.
Most problems aren't solved with skill or ingenuity, but by leaning on plot armour as hard as possible. Like the previously mentioned tank fight where the hero doesn't get hit because the gunner is a bad shot.
I don't know if I'll keep watching the show. If I do, I might do a second review of the series as a whole.
Game Dev - Re-Themeing the Krystal Game?
Posted 5 years agoPeople who watch me might have seen my mini-mech model. That was for a 48 hour mech game I planned to make over the course of a month. That made me realise how few hours I work on a game over a week/month, so I'm going to try and fix that going forward.
I'm not sure if I'll try streaming more often. I'm not "popufur", so I doubt people are interested in watching someone else write code, draw sprites, or struggle with 3D modelling. What do you guys think?
I've ran into a small issue with my monsters in the Krystal game. They have tentacle arms that wiggle while idle or walking. It looked really bad with canned animation. I animated them as separate objects that animate at a random speed and it looks much better, but it's not causing complications with other animations like grabs and stumbles. I'm not sure how to go about fixing this. Going back to canned animations, or animating the arms separately.
Then there's the house itself. It's going to end up looking like a sub-par Hotline Miami. However, I've only just started. I'm putting serious thought into re-themeing the game. Making it a space station, or an office building, something with a bit more verity in terms of floors and furniture. I'm not sure though.
I'm not sure if I'll try streaming more often. I'm not "popufur", so I doubt people are interested in watching someone else write code, draw sprites, or struggle with 3D modelling. What do you guys think?
I've ran into a small issue with my monsters in the Krystal game. They have tentacle arms that wiggle while idle or walking. It looked really bad with canned animation. I animated them as separate objects that animate at a random speed and it looks much better, but it's not causing complications with other animations like grabs and stumbles. I'm not sure how to go about fixing this. Going back to canned animations, or animating the arms separately.
Then there's the house itself. It's going to end up looking like a sub-par Hotline Miami. However, I've only just started. I'm putting serious thought into re-themeing the game. Making it a space station, or an office building, something with a bit more verity in terms of floors and furniture. I'm not sure though.
Film Review - Darkman
Posted 5 years agoI’m not trying to be contrarian, it just happens that many films that have the “classic” label stuck to them don’t really do it for me, while I find many “bad” films unironically entertaining.
Darkman is one such film. Hailed as a classic, but I found it too silly to take seriously, too serious to work as a comedy. Amazing practical stunts and effects placed alongside bad effects that pulled me out of it.
-Plot-
The plot is that a scientist (Liam Neeson) working on an artificial skin unwittingly comes into possession of a memo that proves a crime. The criminals break into his lab, kill his assistant, and blow up the lab leaving him horribly burned and presumed dead. Once he’s recovered, he goes out for revenge.
His main ability is he can make realistic masks from people he has a photograph of, but once the fake skin is exposed to light, it melts 99 minutes later. There is mention of him having super strength and immunity to pain, but that rarely comes up, if ever.
Where the story gets bizarre is that all the characters treat him as a freak unfit for society. I understand him wanting to hide his burns from his girlfriend, but him being cast out and called a monster makes no sense to me.
-Problems-
As mentioned, there are some great effects. The burn makeup is great, and there’s a spectacular sequence at the end of the film where there’s a helicopter flying between tall buildings with a man hanging from a rope. It looks like they really did it too, but then it’s intercut with shots of Liam Neeson in front of a bad rear projection.
The tone is completely buggered as well. The film is quite dark and gritty, and at the same time tries to be a slapstick comedy. You can have dark films with comedy, just look at Robocop or Army of Darkness, but here it’s out of place. Imagine the scene in Robocop where Murphy is getting killed, but the lead bad guy is hopping around on a pogostick complete with cartoon sound effects. During the helicopter scene, they fly low to try and slam him into traffic, and we cut to a loony toons like shot of him running across the top of the cars.
-Overall-
That’s not to say it’s completely awful. I can see why it got a cult following. That said, I didn’t care for it.
Darkman is one such film. Hailed as a classic, but I found it too silly to take seriously, too serious to work as a comedy. Amazing practical stunts and effects placed alongside bad effects that pulled me out of it.
-Plot-
The plot is that a scientist (Liam Neeson) working on an artificial skin unwittingly comes into possession of a memo that proves a crime. The criminals break into his lab, kill his assistant, and blow up the lab leaving him horribly burned and presumed dead. Once he’s recovered, he goes out for revenge.
His main ability is he can make realistic masks from people he has a photograph of, but once the fake skin is exposed to light, it melts 99 minutes later. There is mention of him having super strength and immunity to pain, but that rarely comes up, if ever.
Where the story gets bizarre is that all the characters treat him as a freak unfit for society. I understand him wanting to hide his burns from his girlfriend, but him being cast out and called a monster makes no sense to me.
-Problems-
As mentioned, there are some great effects. The burn makeup is great, and there’s a spectacular sequence at the end of the film where there’s a helicopter flying between tall buildings with a man hanging from a rope. It looks like they really did it too, but then it’s intercut with shots of Liam Neeson in front of a bad rear projection.
The tone is completely buggered as well. The film is quite dark and gritty, and at the same time tries to be a slapstick comedy. You can have dark films with comedy, just look at Robocop or Army of Darkness, but here it’s out of place. Imagine the scene in Robocop where Murphy is getting killed, but the lead bad guy is hopping around on a pogostick complete with cartoon sound effects. During the helicopter scene, they fly low to try and slam him into traffic, and we cut to a loony toons like shot of him running across the top of the cars.
-Overall-
That’s not to say it’s completely awful. I can see why it got a cult following. That said, I didn’t care for it.
Time Issues
Posted 5 years agoLong story short, I've apparently fallen off the wagon when it comes to management. There's a few obligations I seem to have ignored as a result. You likely know what I'm talking about if you're one of the people effected by this.
I think the main sources are an iffy sleep schedule, and my DnD games. I'm a player in one game, running two others.
I think the main sources are an iffy sleep schedule, and my DnD games. I'm a player in one game, running two others.
Film Review - Lady Battle Cop
Posted 5 years agoHave you ever wondered if Robocop would be better if, instead of Peter Weller in the starring role, it was a sexy Japanese woman? Me neither, but someone in Japan apparently did, because they made Lady Battle Cop.
I first heard of this film after seeing .gifs passed around Twitter and Discord showing off the costume. It’s like a cross between Robocop and a Power Ranger, and even includes high heels and what could be described as cyber stockings. It’s great, and the main reason to watch the film.
However, the rest of the film is merely okay, so you can get most of the value from it with an image search and watching some .gifs. It’s available free on YouTube so watch the entire film if time doesn’t matter to you.
-The Plot-
A criminal cartel called the cartel is taking over neo-tokyo. A man builds a cyborg cop to take back the city, all he needs is a doner body. The lab is attacked by the cartel and the man and his fiancee are mortally wounded. The woman demands her fiance use her as a doner. He does so, reluctantly, before dying of his own injuries. She then goes out for revenge both against the hit squad that blew up the lab, and the cartel leader that ordered the hit. I noticed she’s not technically a cop.
Oh, and ED-209 is now a bodybuilder with telekinetic powers.
As you might have noticed, the film is not a 1 to 1 remake of Robocop. It takes the core concept of someone being killed and turned into a cyborg policeman and does it’s own thing. The film lacks the grit and the satire of Robocop, which is fine. It also lacks the budget, but rarely come across as cheap.
-The Problem-
While individual elements are fine, the films biggest problem is it’s structure. If you have any serious interest in film, you’ve likely heard of the Hollywood formula/the monomyth/the hero's journey/the three act structure. It’s a common way for stories to be laid out. While it might be an interesting thought experiment to try and imagine a film that doesn’t follow the formula, once you don’t have it you realise why so many films use that template.
Lady Battle Cop kind of follows the formula, but it moves things around. The end result is a film that can feel weird and disjointed, sometimes it feels like a scene is missing or has been moved to a different part of the film.
It’s hard to do an apples to apples comparison, but I’ll explain it like this. Imagine if in James Bond: Goldeneye, Sean Bean is killed off a third of the way into the film, and Ourumov doesn’t do anything the entire film apart from sitting in his office making phone calls. Or if in Indiana Jones: The Last Crusade, after the young Indie scene, we get a 10-15 minute scene showing the nazi lady going through college.
-Result-
As said, Lady Battle Cop is okay, or above average. The costume is good and some of the action is fun. The bizarre structure does lead to some surprises. At one point I was starting to doubt the woman from the start was going to be Lady Battle Cop because there’s such a long time between her supposed death and her showing up.
I feel bad being so negative here. It’s memorable, and rarely got boring, but there’s not enough substance for me to recommend it unless you want 80 minutes of a woman walking around in sexy robocop cosplay fighting a telepathic body builder, and let’s be honest, who doesn’t want that?
At very least, I think it’s worth a google image search, or finding some .gifs of the action scenes.
I first heard of this film after seeing .gifs passed around Twitter and Discord showing off the costume. It’s like a cross between Robocop and a Power Ranger, and even includes high heels and what could be described as cyber stockings. It’s great, and the main reason to watch the film.
However, the rest of the film is merely okay, so you can get most of the value from it with an image search and watching some .gifs. It’s available free on YouTube so watch the entire film if time doesn’t matter to you.
-The Plot-
A criminal cartel called the cartel is taking over neo-tokyo. A man builds a cyborg cop to take back the city, all he needs is a doner body. The lab is attacked by the cartel and the man and his fiancee are mortally wounded. The woman demands her fiance use her as a doner. He does so, reluctantly, before dying of his own injuries. She then goes out for revenge both against the hit squad that blew up the lab, and the cartel leader that ordered the hit. I noticed she’s not technically a cop.
Oh, and ED-209 is now a bodybuilder with telekinetic powers.
As you might have noticed, the film is not a 1 to 1 remake of Robocop. It takes the core concept of someone being killed and turned into a cyborg policeman and does it’s own thing. The film lacks the grit and the satire of Robocop, which is fine. It also lacks the budget, but rarely come across as cheap.
-The Problem-
While individual elements are fine, the films biggest problem is it’s structure. If you have any serious interest in film, you’ve likely heard of the Hollywood formula/the monomyth/the hero's journey/the three act structure. It’s a common way for stories to be laid out. While it might be an interesting thought experiment to try and imagine a film that doesn’t follow the formula, once you don’t have it you realise why so many films use that template.
Lady Battle Cop kind of follows the formula, but it moves things around. The end result is a film that can feel weird and disjointed, sometimes it feels like a scene is missing or has been moved to a different part of the film.
It’s hard to do an apples to apples comparison, but I’ll explain it like this. Imagine if in James Bond: Goldeneye, Sean Bean is killed off a third of the way into the film, and Ourumov doesn’t do anything the entire film apart from sitting in his office making phone calls. Or if in Indiana Jones: The Last Crusade, after the young Indie scene, we get a 10-15 minute scene showing the nazi lady going through college.
-Result-
As said, Lady Battle Cop is okay, or above average. The costume is good and some of the action is fun. The bizarre structure does lead to some surprises. At one point I was starting to doubt the woman from the start was going to be Lady Battle Cop because there’s such a long time between her supposed death and her showing up.
I feel bad being so negative here. It’s memorable, and rarely got boring, but there’s not enough substance for me to recommend it unless you want 80 minutes of a woman walking around in sexy robocop cosplay fighting a telepathic body builder, and let’s be honest, who doesn’t want that?
At very least, I think it’s worth a google image search, or finding some .gifs of the action scenes.
Films, games, books. How hard is it to be successful?
Posted 5 years agoToday, I want to talk about making films, games, and books.
For a long time I’ve wondered why so many films and tv shows are, to put it bluntly, bad. Either they cost an outrageous amount of money for no obvious reason, or they are so poorly thought out and half arsed that I wonder why the people got the job to begin with.
Then we have books. I hear stories of authors trying for years, decades even trying to get a manuscript published with no success. Yet most books are either boring or lack substance.
I’ll give one concrete example. I’ve heard Eragon was written by a 15 year old, ripped off stuff from other fantasy books, and is widely disliked, but it was successful enough to get a film, game, a series of sequels, and has a fanbase to this day.
I could go on, but you get the idea.
Now, the obvious answer is that publishing/production companies are corrupt, and that’s certainly part of it, but I sometimes wonder how difficult creating these things really is.
I’ve said in the past that I’ve considered making my own film, but I always think of other things I’d rather spend the money on. I’m not a writer, but I sometimes wonder if I could write a story that is at least on par with most of the crap out there.
But then that arrogance makes me suspect it’s not that easy. If it was, there would be a glut of great media now.
For a long time I’ve wondered why so many films and tv shows are, to put it bluntly, bad. Either they cost an outrageous amount of money for no obvious reason, or they are so poorly thought out and half arsed that I wonder why the people got the job to begin with.
Then we have books. I hear stories of authors trying for years, decades even trying to get a manuscript published with no success. Yet most books are either boring or lack substance.
I’ll give one concrete example. I’ve heard Eragon was written by a 15 year old, ripped off stuff from other fantasy books, and is widely disliked, but it was successful enough to get a film, game, a series of sequels, and has a fanbase to this day.
I could go on, but you get the idea.
Now, the obvious answer is that publishing/production companies are corrupt, and that’s certainly part of it, but I sometimes wonder how difficult creating these things really is.
I’ve said in the past that I’ve considered making my own film, but I always think of other things I’d rather spend the money on. I’m not a writer, but I sometimes wonder if I could write a story that is at least on par with most of the crap out there.
But then that arrogance makes me suspect it’s not that easy. If it was, there would be a glut of great media now.
“Stickbugged” - The new Rick Rolled
Posted 5 years agoToday, I want to rant a little about memes.
Back in the day, there was a meme called Rick Rolling. Most probably know it, but the gist was instead of linking to a site or video, you’d like to “Never going to give you up”. Recently, the meme “stickbugged” seems to have replaced it.
But I’m not here to rant about cyclical memes. What interests me about stickbugged is watching it evolve in real time. I’ve seen various attempts to make a rickroll replacement. Such as cutting to a video of dancing battle droids from Star Wars with the caption “You got Roger Rogered”, cutting to a Toyota Corolla advert with “You got corolla’d”, I even remember some friends of a friend discussing plans to make the Thomas the Tank Engine intro a bait and switch meme. Obviously non of those gained any traction, but “stickbugged” seemed to have stuck, at least now.
To me, a meme has to be organic, but if stickbugged is as cynical as the previously attempts I doubt it will last more than a month or 2.
The problem with bait and switch memes is they're hard to use effectively. Either the person has to be asking for something they shouldn’t, or be incredibly lazy. Posting a cat video with a cat in the thumbnail in a funny animal videos thread isn’t really a joke. It’s like those fake game announcements where they say “Bethesda announced Fallout 5! ...April fools!” even though it’s August. Nothing about that statement is unreasonable, so there’s nothing stupid about “falling for it”.
Back in the day, there was a meme called Rick Rolling. Most probably know it, but the gist was instead of linking to a site or video, you’d like to “Never going to give you up”. Recently, the meme “stickbugged” seems to have replaced it.
But I’m not here to rant about cyclical memes. What interests me about stickbugged is watching it evolve in real time. I’ve seen various attempts to make a rickroll replacement. Such as cutting to a video of dancing battle droids from Star Wars with the caption “You got Roger Rogered”, cutting to a Toyota Corolla advert with “You got corolla’d”, I even remember some friends of a friend discussing plans to make the Thomas the Tank Engine intro a bait and switch meme. Obviously non of those gained any traction, but “stickbugged” seemed to have stuck, at least now.
To me, a meme has to be organic, but if stickbugged is as cynical as the previously attempts I doubt it will last more than a month or 2.
The problem with bait and switch memes is they're hard to use effectively. Either the person has to be asking for something they shouldn’t, or be incredibly lazy. Posting a cat video with a cat in the thumbnail in a funny animal videos thread isn’t really a joke. It’s like those fake game announcements where they say “Bethesda announced Fallout 5! ...April fools!” even though it’s August. Nothing about that statement is unreasonable, so there’s nothing stupid about “falling for it”.
I'm on the keto diet. It's going well.
Posted 5 years agoAround the beginning of June, I started a new diet. A low carb diet known as Keto. Yes, the one that’s the butt of jokes online, but it’s working for me in a way no other diet or fitness program has. I lost a stone in a month, and I want to share my thoughts on it.
-How I ended up on this diet-
My weight has been getting out of control in recent years. I used to describe my build as somewhere between “hells angel” and “neckbeard”. I couldn’t really say that any more.
A while ago, much of my immediate family were diagnosed as diabetic. I was cleared, and since then have been trying to avoid the same fate.
Various diets and fitness programs didn’t work, with one exception of couch to 5k, but that didn’t help with the weight problem.
A couple of months ago, I came to a realisation that healthy people’s relation to food wasn’t the same as a dieters relation to food. Eg. Healthy people aren’t going to weekly support groups, dealing with guilt, or filling in condescending spreadsheets with big red Xs on when they eat anything that isn’t a salad. Add in the failures of low fat diets and rising obesity rates, and it’s clear traditional low fat dieting isn’t working.
I won’t bore you with the specifics, but it’ll suffice to say that I fell down a YouTube rabbit hole and eventually decided to try a low carb diet. I knew there were health risks and complications that could arise, but I tried it for 2 weeks and sure enough, I not only lost weight, I did so in a way that meant I could occasionally enjoy food like a normal person.
-How does it work-
I’m no dietologist or whatever, so this is just a summary of how I understand it. Since there are potential health problems with this, be sure to look into it yourself before trying it. Especially if you’re diabetic, on medication, or have heart problems.
In bare bones layman's terms, the body has two kinds of fuel. Sugars, and fat. Sugar is short term fuel, fat is long term fuel. The goal of low carb is to cut that sugars out to the point that the body starts using fat. This is called Ketosis, and where the recent version of diet gets its name.
Eating sugars knocks you out of ketosis until the sugar runs out again. This is why you can “cheat” on this diet with little consequence. Obviously if you cheat all the time it’s not a diet any more, but you can have a pizza, an ice cream, or a can of pop, and not completely ruin your diet.
When you’re in ketosis, the effect is noticeable. Symptoms like the distinctive bad breath aren’t fun when they happen, but in hindsight it makes me realise the diet is working. It also acts as somewhat of an appetite suppressant, since I wasn’t eating as much or craving snacks as much as before.
-The diet itself-
What separates keto and low carb diets from other “low sugar” diets is that sugars aren’t just in sweats, but in grains such as wheat, rice, and corn, while not caring much about the amount of fat.
There are lots of types of low carb diet. Over 30s might remember the Atkins diet from the late 90s or so. While the diets differ in method and strict-ness, the general idea remains the same as outlined about. Get your body into ketosis and keep it there as long as possible until desired weight is achieved.
I chose Keto, the most strict version, expecting to fail, but knowing that if I failed by a little bit, I’d still be well in range of the more lenient diets like Atkins.
The diet is kinda bland to be honest. No pasta, no bread, and no sweets. In my case every meal is bacon and egg, or sausages and eggs. That’s basically it. Fizzy water, blackcurrant, milk, and no sugar pops are my drinks of choice and likely where I go over the strict keto limit. I don't drink booze or anything like that so such things were not a concern for me.
-I don’t get the joke-
The diet is working for me, so far. What I don’t get is why it’s such a big joke. My parents take it seriously, though they are worried the diet might not be good for my health, and family congratulate me on losing weight, but on the wider internet the diet seems to be something of a joke, and I don’t know why. Even know-your-meme basically shrugs.
So yeah, don’t know if there’s any interest in this, but I thought I’d talk about it.
-How I ended up on this diet-
My weight has been getting out of control in recent years. I used to describe my build as somewhere between “hells angel” and “neckbeard”. I couldn’t really say that any more.
A while ago, much of my immediate family were diagnosed as diabetic. I was cleared, and since then have been trying to avoid the same fate.
Various diets and fitness programs didn’t work, with one exception of couch to 5k, but that didn’t help with the weight problem.
A couple of months ago, I came to a realisation that healthy people’s relation to food wasn’t the same as a dieters relation to food. Eg. Healthy people aren’t going to weekly support groups, dealing with guilt, or filling in condescending spreadsheets with big red Xs on when they eat anything that isn’t a salad. Add in the failures of low fat diets and rising obesity rates, and it’s clear traditional low fat dieting isn’t working.
I won’t bore you with the specifics, but it’ll suffice to say that I fell down a YouTube rabbit hole and eventually decided to try a low carb diet. I knew there were health risks and complications that could arise, but I tried it for 2 weeks and sure enough, I not only lost weight, I did so in a way that meant I could occasionally enjoy food like a normal person.
-How does it work-
I’m no dietologist or whatever, so this is just a summary of how I understand it. Since there are potential health problems with this, be sure to look into it yourself before trying it. Especially if you’re diabetic, on medication, or have heart problems.
In bare bones layman's terms, the body has two kinds of fuel. Sugars, and fat. Sugar is short term fuel, fat is long term fuel. The goal of low carb is to cut that sugars out to the point that the body starts using fat. This is called Ketosis, and where the recent version of diet gets its name.
Eating sugars knocks you out of ketosis until the sugar runs out again. This is why you can “cheat” on this diet with little consequence. Obviously if you cheat all the time it’s not a diet any more, but you can have a pizza, an ice cream, or a can of pop, and not completely ruin your diet.
When you’re in ketosis, the effect is noticeable. Symptoms like the distinctive bad breath aren’t fun when they happen, but in hindsight it makes me realise the diet is working. It also acts as somewhat of an appetite suppressant, since I wasn’t eating as much or craving snacks as much as before.
-The diet itself-
What separates keto and low carb diets from other “low sugar” diets is that sugars aren’t just in sweats, but in grains such as wheat, rice, and corn, while not caring much about the amount of fat.
There are lots of types of low carb diet. Over 30s might remember the Atkins diet from the late 90s or so. While the diets differ in method and strict-ness, the general idea remains the same as outlined about. Get your body into ketosis and keep it there as long as possible until desired weight is achieved.
I chose Keto, the most strict version, expecting to fail, but knowing that if I failed by a little bit, I’d still be well in range of the more lenient diets like Atkins.
The diet is kinda bland to be honest. No pasta, no bread, and no sweets. In my case every meal is bacon and egg, or sausages and eggs. That’s basically it. Fizzy water, blackcurrant, milk, and no sugar pops are my drinks of choice and likely where I go over the strict keto limit. I don't drink booze or anything like that so such things were not a concern for me.
-I don’t get the joke-
The diet is working for me, so far. What I don’t get is why it’s such a big joke. My parents take it seriously, though they are worried the diet might not be good for my health, and family congratulate me on losing weight, but on the wider internet the diet seems to be something of a joke, and I don’t know why. Even know-your-meme basically shrugs.
So yeah, don’t know if there’s any interest in this, but I thought I’d talk about it.
Rant - Shipping/Romance Plots Are The Worst
Posted 5 years agoI was watching the Netflix series Dark, which looked like a Tales From The Loop knock off, which was something I wanted. Just something to have on the TV while I eat breakfast.
This show about anomalies, mystery, and time travel spent the first 10 minutes going over who is fucking who, and kids arguing over a missing hoodie. I skimmed through the episode, and aside from one kid going missing, there was nothing really to advance the plot. It was all personal drama.
I hate this.
It’s a trend I’ve noticed over the last 6 years or so. Take genre fiction, be it sci-fi, action, adventure, super heroes, or even a specific licence like GhostBusters or She-Ra, minimise or completely remove the reason people are watching the thing and focus on love triangles and petty relationship drama.
Imagine going to watch an action movie, and the plot synopsis is “Darren is fucking his brothers wife while they go through a messy divorce, but tensions are further raised when he admit he wouldn’t quit his job to raise the kids-” Do you care? Does anybody care? I’m here for kung fu, stunts, explosions, and gun fights, not what someone is doing with their penis.
This is something I blame on social justice in general and Tumbr specifically. Toxic fanbases who don’t care about the thing they’re watching. All that matters is how popular the show is, and the relationship status and sexual orientation of the cast. That’s it. Everything else is largely irrelevant. How else do you explain the big finale of a popular “action adventure sci-fi” show for children being a gay kiss?
The obvious solution to this would be to make shows that cater to the Tumblr shipping crowd exclusively. Drop the pretense of being a genre show or a kids show and just have a romance drama, but the “how popular it is” part is important to Tumblr. In the case of She-Ra, the first season got 3000+ reviews, the second barely managed 300+, and by the final season barely 150. That’s a fairly steep fall off. Contrast this to DareDevil which had 8000 reviews, then 7000-ish for the rest of the seasons.
Part of me wants to say that this is done to appease the small but rabid Tumblr audience. Those guys will harass people to the point of suicide after all. Another part of me thinks this is to get good reviews from the press who will throw praise at anything that appeases their demands for “diversity”. All possible and fairly probable, but I have another theory. It’s cheap and easy.
Filling 10 hours of screen time with effects and action scenes is time consuming and expensive. Relationship drama? That’s just people talking. No need to worry about effects, or waiting for the right weather to film a scene. If it’s animated, no need to spend money on fluid or complex animation. It can also be padded out almost indefinitely. Just have them argue, reconcile, argue, reconcile, over and over and over.
One final point I want to make. Even as a kid, I didn’t like it when shows like MASK or Transformers focused on the annoying kid characters. I’m there to watch Matt Tracker and Optimus Prime, not annoying kids. Same with the token romance plots that almost every film had to have by law. Films like Dredd, John Wick, and The Raid prove that you don’t need that stuff to make a good film, but the last 6 years they've gone backwards. Instead of a token romance subplot, they are now relationship dramas with a token action C-plot they include out of obligation (assuming they include it at all).
This show about anomalies, mystery, and time travel spent the first 10 minutes going over who is fucking who, and kids arguing over a missing hoodie. I skimmed through the episode, and aside from one kid going missing, there was nothing really to advance the plot. It was all personal drama.
I hate this.
It’s a trend I’ve noticed over the last 6 years or so. Take genre fiction, be it sci-fi, action, adventure, super heroes, or even a specific licence like GhostBusters or She-Ra, minimise or completely remove the reason people are watching the thing and focus on love triangles and petty relationship drama.
Imagine going to watch an action movie, and the plot synopsis is “Darren is fucking his brothers wife while they go through a messy divorce, but tensions are further raised when he admit he wouldn’t quit his job to raise the kids-” Do you care? Does anybody care? I’m here for kung fu, stunts, explosions, and gun fights, not what someone is doing with their penis.
This is something I blame on social justice in general and Tumbr specifically. Toxic fanbases who don’t care about the thing they’re watching. All that matters is how popular the show is, and the relationship status and sexual orientation of the cast. That’s it. Everything else is largely irrelevant. How else do you explain the big finale of a popular “action adventure sci-fi” show for children being a gay kiss?
The obvious solution to this would be to make shows that cater to the Tumblr shipping crowd exclusively. Drop the pretense of being a genre show or a kids show and just have a romance drama, but the “how popular it is” part is important to Tumblr. In the case of She-Ra, the first season got 3000+ reviews, the second barely managed 300+, and by the final season barely 150. That’s a fairly steep fall off. Contrast this to DareDevil which had 8000 reviews, then 7000-ish for the rest of the seasons.
Part of me wants to say that this is done to appease the small but rabid Tumblr audience. Those guys will harass people to the point of suicide after all. Another part of me thinks this is to get good reviews from the press who will throw praise at anything that appeases their demands for “diversity”. All possible and fairly probable, but I have another theory. It’s cheap and easy.
Filling 10 hours of screen time with effects and action scenes is time consuming and expensive. Relationship drama? That’s just people talking. No need to worry about effects, or waiting for the right weather to film a scene. If it’s animated, no need to spend money on fluid or complex animation. It can also be padded out almost indefinitely. Just have them argue, reconcile, argue, reconcile, over and over and over.
One final point I want to make. Even as a kid, I didn’t like it when shows like MASK or Transformers focused on the annoying kid characters. I’m there to watch Matt Tracker and Optimus Prime, not annoying kids. Same with the token romance plots that almost every film had to have by law. Films like Dredd, John Wick, and The Raid prove that you don’t need that stuff to make a good film, but the last 6 years they've gone backwards. Instead of a token romance subplot, they are now relationship dramas with a token action C-plot they include out of obligation (assuming they include it at all).
Drama - Don’t like Goodbye Volcano High? Banned!
Posted 5 years agoToday’s humourous bit of drama comes from Discord. I was banned from a discord server because ...I talked shit about Goodbye Volcano High.
For those unaware, Goodbye Volcano High is a “game” that was announced during the PS5 announcement stream. The trailer shows what seems to be a Night in the Woods if it was a Netflix series.
You can see the trailer here
At time of writing the trailer has 11,000+ dislikes and 2800+ comments mostly making fun of the game.
And why wouldn’t they? The “dinosaurs” look more like dolphins, with the main character even having angel wings. No gameplay is shown, and by the looks of things the plot seems to be typical teen angst of the “school sucks also I’m gay” verity that Tumblr thinks is deep and meaningful (see Life is Strange).
Don’t point this out to the fanboys though. Like I said, I got banned for saying the game looks cringy. Not much to really add to that.
Something I’ve complained about with the “Games as Art” crowd is their stance that not liking their games makes you a bad person. In this case, wanting a game to actually have gameplay is “detrimental to the games industry”. What?
Edit- It gets better, or worse depending on your sense of humour. According to people on the internet, the lead writer for Goodbye Volcano High is the same person who wrote the infamous Kotaku article with underage, uncensored Harry Potter porn in it.
For those unaware, Goodbye Volcano High is a “game” that was announced during the PS5 announcement stream. The trailer shows what seems to be a Night in the Woods if it was a Netflix series.
You can see the trailer here
At time of writing the trailer has 11,000+ dislikes and 2800+ comments mostly making fun of the game.
And why wouldn’t they? The “dinosaurs” look more like dolphins, with the main character even having angel wings. No gameplay is shown, and by the looks of things the plot seems to be typical teen angst of the “school sucks also I’m gay” verity that Tumblr thinks is deep and meaningful (see Life is Strange).
Don’t point this out to the fanboys though. Like I said, I got banned for saying the game looks cringy. Not much to really add to that.
Something I’ve complained about with the “Games as Art” crowd is their stance that not liking their games makes you a bad person. In this case, wanting a game to actually have gameplay is “detrimental to the games industry”. What?
Edit- It gets better, or worse depending on your sense of humour. According to people on the internet, the lead writer for Goodbye Volcano High is the same person who wrote the infamous Kotaku article with underage, uncensored Harry Potter porn in it.
