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General | Posted 4 years agoWith the leg thing have found that reaching some lights is a pain in the ass. I am trying to get a set of smart bulbs.
Specifically: https://www.amazon.com/dp/B091GCJ4R.....KW3ZRK8HQQXD3P
A set or two those strategically around the house will be a god send.
Specifically: https://www.amazon.com/dp/B091GCJ4R.....KW3ZRK8HQQXD3P
A set or two those strategically around the house will be a god send.
Update on medical. Still could use a little help....
General | Posted 4 years ago Hello everyone.
I figured that everyone would like a update since it's just shy of a month since the surgery.
I today got the staples and stitches out. I had 20 staples total and a long set of three stitches. So once the last little bit heals then I am good. Still tender.
Thanks to 
lucidum and 
lilbluefoxie I got a basic wheelchair. It's good for the house and such. So thank you two. Ps it's also called the L&M special.
And thanks to 
werefox18 for a basic set of crutches. Will admit it's been on the back burner to use them since no place to use propperly. And well not ready.
The landlord installed a ramp. Its steep as hell, and we need some flagstones to pave a small path thru the mud/gravel.
So things body wise are doing better. I am up and about. I am using the wheelchair. Can cook some. Able to get to my computer. So much more, but still very limited.
----
Now that I updated, and the "good news" is out of the way.
This has thrown a huge wrench in my finances. Like we drained the savings to just cover some small things. We are to the point Meds are having to be chosen which is more important or able to put off. Laundry is cant be done x.x. small things like that.
I also atm can't get to a shower. So it's been bath wipes cause I even still don't have a way up the stairs. So wanna get a kiddy pool for the kitchen. And sit in it. So yeah. Help?
So I am sadly asking for any type of donation. Please. Begging at this point.
Now added a gofundme: https://gofund.me/08de9e4f 
lucidum
lilbluefoxie
werefox18Leg update.
General | Posted 4 years agoMy last journal is gonna be my default for the fore seeable future. https://www.furaffinity.net/journal/9859488/
But I am making a separate one for one reason; CBT gummies. It helps with the phantom pains, and actual pain. If anyone is willing to mail me any or the sorts I would love it so much. I can't reliably get them locally or afford atm. The few I got where from when my mom visited. Note me or pass this around please.
Thank you..
But I am making a separate one for one reason; CBT gummies. It helps with the phantom pains, and actual pain. If anyone is willing to mail me any or the sorts I would love it so much. I can't reliably get them locally or afford atm. The few I got where from when my mom visited. Note me or pass this around please.
Thank you..
I am home, BUT
General | Posted 4 years agoMinus a left leg. But I am home, and such. I face a huge, HUGE, uphill fona dial battle. I have no insurance, and such so they sent me home with nothing but a few cheap wraps.
I may not get a prostatic.
I get next to zero therapy or rehab.
I have no crutches or wheelchair of any kind.
I am in a 2 story standard duplex and have no room or possibility to move. So help. Help please. Anything.
Go GoFundMe: https://gofund.me/08de9e4f
I may not get a prostatic.
I get next to zero therapy or rehab.
I have no crutches or wheelchair of any kind.
I am in a 2 story standard duplex and have no room or possibility to move. So help. Help please. Anything.
Go GoFundMe: https://gofund.me/08de9e4f
CLEAR GOALS
1. a wheelchair for outside of the house. Something to leave in the car or use outside house. [Really want a decent electric, but that's a huge wamt]
2. A set of forearm/resting crutches to use to around house. These are a long term goal.
3. A shower seat so I can clean myself properly.
4. Handrails. Support/lifting rails for places around the house to make it easier to reach commodes. Shower, and so forth.
5. Devices to make it easier to get in bed, and other places.
6. I don't think I was given choice for a prosthetic leg. This is less a clear but more a hope and desire.
7. Cash. It helps with meds or surprises. Anything helps at this point.
WARNING THIS CAN BE GRAPHIC
BLOOD/GORE/SURGERY
Some have questioning if this happened. Here is a imgur to prove this is real:
Leg issues https://imgur.com/a/k2HQjRh Hospital and Leg update.
General | Posted 4 years agoHello everyone. This is a less then drugged ramble sorry. Those last ones were as I being taken away to put under. Or just waking up. Atm its more ot less been same for almost 3 days now.
I no longer have my left leg below the Knee. So yeah. Its official. I am a one legged Kitsune. Though I have a idea.....
But back to the current biggest issue is that I still have no insurance and sofirth.
Also let's see you say no now Disability!
I no longer have my left leg below the Knee. So yeah. Its official. I am a one legged Kitsune. Though I have a idea.....
But back to the current biggest issue is that I still have no insurance and sofirth.
Also let's see you say no now Disability!
Help
General | Posted 4 years agoI guess the search for a fake leg begins..... also the help to pay this bill and much more.
All but the knee
General | Posted 4 years agoI just lost all leg on my left side too soon for me to tell.
Hospital Day 5 part 2
General | Posted 4 years agoWell. The doctors are all starting to talk about taking my leg below the knee.
Guys. I am so scared.
Guys. I am so scared.
Hospital Day 5
General | Posted 4 years agoIt's taking all the will power to not up and explode in pain. My calf and shin muscles are all but locked and that is just killing me. I had to walk to bathroom with a walker. That took all the energy out of me. Most nurses and doctors have been pretty good. Beyond the UNBEARABLE pain. I am feeling better.
I have MRSA again and half a foot less then yesterday.
General | Posted 4 years agoWhich means I am in Medical Isolation. And all I want is to be hugged.
I feel so alone and beaten. I want my friend's, my mate. My family.
I feel so alone and beaten. I want my friend's, my mate. My family.
Yup. I am losing a foot.
General | Posted 4 years agoNothing much else to say.
At least the pain will finally stop.
At least the pain will finally stop.
Live from the hospital:
General | Posted 4 years agoIt's a kitsune who's most likely gonna lose a foot on no insurance or payment methods at all.
I had a small diabetic ulcer on bottom of foot. Last friday I got my second vaccine. From then till yesterday I was feeling shitty and pretty much stuck in bed. Yesterday. I unwrapped my foot and large sloughs of my foot where oozing off. It was confirmed the infection was in most my foot bones.
If you pray. Please do so. If your willing to help with coming up financial hit. That helps. Anything. Please.
I had a small diabetic ulcer on bottom of foot. Last friday I got my second vaccine. From then till yesterday I was feeling shitty and pretty much stuck in bed. Yesterday. I unwrapped my foot and large sloughs of my foot where oozing off. It was confirmed the infection was in most my foot bones.
If you pray. Please do so. If your willing to help with coming up financial hit. That helps. Anything. Please.
Glasses are bad. Help?
General | Posted 4 years agoHey guys. My glasses are officially unabled to be ignored.... I am having constant fuzzy vision and headaches. I don't know if I am getting a stimulus or not. I don't know if I can even wait that long. Help?
Munchietheredfox[at]gmail.com is my PayPal
Munchietheredfox[at]gmail.com is my PayPal
*throws confetti* yay. Another Birthday
General | Posted 5 years agoYay. I survived 36 years. No expectation this year.
Need my Medicine. Help? [Reached]
General | Posted 5 years agoThis is my Bloodpressure meds that I can't stop taking. My doctor says if I don't get it I may have another stroke.
So any help is appreciated. I just needs a little help. $50 should do it.
Paypal: munchietheredfox@gmail.com
Reached that goal. Anyone willing to help it puts some food on the plate. Thank you all.
Getting harder ...
General | Posted 5 years agoFeeling more alone day to day. I try talking to people. And I feel some never talk back. And that kills me.
I really could use someone besides the two or three that are always there. Ever since my stroke it's been hard to keep my spirits up.
I really could use someone besides the two or three that are always there. Ever since my stroke it's been hard to keep my spirits up.
I had a stroke.
General | Posted 5 years agoLast Friday, June 27th, I woke up to my right arm and leg being unable to move. I tried to make it down the stairs and had to call to mate for assistance. I didnt have any face slump, speech impairment, or any other sign. So we decided to see if it was pinched or blocked nerve. 24 hours later and it feeling worse I decided to goto the er. We got in, and did the normal bs. MRI later and admitted. One nurse who works the neuro ward where I first landed admitted I probably should be released as all signs point to it already being clear. From there I was a guest of the hospital for 24 hours with no one talking to me. On Monday they released me with nearly $500 worth of meds I can't afford. So yayyyy....
I am home and I can mostly use my arm again, but my leg is still stiff. I feel ok, and ever hug thing. I felt it was time to let everyone know....
If you find the kindness to help or pass this along I am grateful. PayPal: munchietheredfox[at]gmail.com anything will help.
I am home and I can mostly use my arm again, but my leg is still stiff. I feel ok, and ever hug thing. I felt it was time to let everyone know....
If you find the kindness to help or pass this along I am grateful. PayPal: munchietheredfox[at]gmail.com anything will help.
Lose in my family and my extended quietness
General | Posted 5 years ago I know just under two Months ago I posted a bad journal about my depression. There was a second personal part to it I kept from most except my closest, and dearest friends. About 2 days earlier I got a message from my Mom that my father had cancer.
So that really had been effecting me from Christmas till I posted that journal. At christmas me and my mate went to see him. He was extremely sick at the time. So we left early via request to have him goto er. [He didn't.] After the new year he went several times for fluid in the lungs. After the 4th visit it was tested and came back positive for cancer cells.
So in the following weeks he went to the nessicary doctors, and such. It was found he has, and confirmed: Stomach, lung, liver, throat, colon, and POSSIBLY brain and bone. The brain and bone weren't tested for but action speak loudly. Bone because his spine had crumbled to the point where it was being called. "Broken"...
But he was told at the time everything would be a delaying action. The family started making their peace. And he went in for Chemo about 2 weeks after the initial diagnosis. Part of that is tbe house is on quarantine. I being a carrier of MRSA in a dormant form wanted to get to see him. So I did a quick 3 day run to see him. It was as pleasent as one would ask for.
So he goes in for his chemo. It kicked his ass. And this is where we think he realizes he jsnt going to survive this. He was due to have it weekly on fridays. He had his first. Missed the second due to low blood and got it a week later. The following week according to my mom and family he just was so defeated and white.
On Feburary 27th I got the call at 3:30pm my time I got a call from my sister. I never get calls from her. So I knew before I picked up that he was gone. I answered and got the word. Less then 3 hours later i was on the road to Knoxville
I got in super early on Friday and my mom I got our talking done. He went quick and that's what I am going to leave it at.
Please as a request to me, him, and my family: Do Not put anything along the lines of: Praying for him, you, or the sort. Its not what he wanted and not what I need or want.
*takes in a long deep breath and let's out a long hard sigh*
The hard parts[/]
The living will suffer most, and your family will hurt you the worse.
Remember that. It will explain alit when you lose one close to you
The day after he passed we began the long search for the important stuff. Insurance, paperwork, and so forth. We began to find alot of discrepancy in many things. Too many. My mom, sister, and I have a life insurance plan; he didn't. Some Bill's are being paid three times; some not at all. Bill's that were line: "what the actual fuck." Like nearly $50,000 in debt worth of Bill's.
Now this is just Friday. My sister lives in town, and I live 13 hours away. I have two older brothers in Flordia. We for word the middle brother was coming in Sunday. We all agreed that he would be best for the VA, bank, and so forth. So Saturday was for my mom. Gave her sometime alone to grieve, but sister and some other factors took that away.
Sunday happens, and brother gets in. He gets to work, and I am tasked with cooking, and general chores. So my sister comes over with her kids and he is all but insulting my sister. She's always been an joke to everyone cause not so smart.... but he is taking time to hurt her. I finish cooking and find out he is on a keytone diet and refuses to eat.
Monday rolls in and this is the day that..... shit hits the fan. Him and my mom goto the bank. I wake up that day with a massive migraine. So until almost 2 I am stuck in bed. But I get up and push thru to try and do the few chores asked to do. A few friends will tell you around 4 I was wondering where they where. Suddenly they pull in and I go to see if they need help.....
The moment my brother walks in it turns nearly into a fist fight... but it was a full on yelling match. *sighs* the simplest way to put it is this:
She is fucked, and you and your sister are not helping or caring. She cant do anything because of the debt, and you two are only making it worse. Also I am right because I "have jesus" and "you have no idea how to parent."
That. That last part is a trigger for me. Everyone told him afterwards that was the worst thing to even say. Those who know me know why. So after spending 3 hours in basement in tears I go lock myself in room. It's just was easier to avoid him while we both in same house.
So Tuesday comes and I again avoid him like the plague. Had. a bad pain day and was out of action most of it. He and mom went to a steak place that was originally ment for the family to go an celebrate my dads birthday that it was his 69th. But with his attitude me and my sister refused to go. So I went and got a burger. When I got back got the death stare from him again. After he went to bed I apologized to my mom. Apparently he apologized to her for what he said to me. But not to me. X.x
But once he left early Wednesday I got full report......
She is going to lose it all.
The family house. Gone.
Her truck. Gone.
The travel trailer. Gone.
So much more. I couldn't even make a full list. It's that long.
The debt came out to he closer to $100,000. She has been retired on disability for nearly 10 years now. And him was 27ish. He also got some va benefits. But it works out to where she gets $5k a month. But the total accumulation and payment of the debt requires $8k a month. No matter what. She loses it all.
So for the foreseeable future I am not gonna be around much. And making many trips to Knoxville to help
I love you all. And sorry I been so quiet. But uts been hard... and only getting harder.
I will try and be more active, but nothing van be promised...In a bad place. Could use some kind words or anything....
General | Posted 6 years agoTitle is pretty self explanatory. Been in a bad place mentally as of late. I can only count maybe 4 people who honestly I feel care or try.... and even then. .
I feel like nothing I say anywhere is well read. Twitter is a damned joke. Almost never see anything responded to on there. I know I rarely on here. Sorry managment has let me down. And health hasn't been best for me to stay up to date on here. Another year where I am most likely gonna miss all cons. And that bugs me most due to missing my friends. And art. Ha. Never seem to get that anymore. Can't afford it, or when I do.... still waiting nearly 5 years later on the only one that mattered most....
And j miss my friends most.... and right now.... I could use them most. Badly. Please.
I feel like nothing I say anywhere is well read. Twitter is a damned joke. Almost never see anything responded to on there. I know I rarely on here. Sorry managment has let me down. And health hasn't been best for me to stay up to date on here. Another year where I am most likely gonna miss all cons. And that bugs me most due to missing my friends. And art. Ha. Never seem to get that anymore. Can't afford it, or when I do.... still waiting nearly 5 years later on the only one that mattered most....
And j miss my friends most.... and right now.... I could use them most. Badly. Please.
A year ends and a new decade begins. Let's look back.....
General | Posted 6 years ago So I turned 35 this year. And that is actually a huge milestone for me. Considering I started this century by being told I wouldn't make it to 25. So every year to me is a personal goal.
There are many things I wanna look back on. But sometimes it's hard. My older friends will remember my horrid migraines. Days at a time laying in bed unable to move for any reason. But luckily I only have small headaches now and the occasional migraine for a day.. two max now.
I also this decade started to have this foot pain that plagues me to this day. I can tell you the day it actually became a problem. July 12th 2012. Yup. It's a stand out date to me cause it has plagued me for so long.
I also got to meet one of the most important people in my life. 
nickada we met in 2011, met each other in 2012, and I moved in with her in 2013. we became mates in August 21st of 2013. It was rough here and there but we are each others person. All I have to say about her is what she knows, and that's what matters.
And I also met the one person who I would literal do anything for 
bluekitsune we meet on Secondlife in 2009. He was just there one day in my spaceship. We both had the SAME avatar, and just like. Kitsune? And ever since then we have been nearly inseparable. We met up in 2011 for a road trip from Utah to Tennessee to Ohio. Then I rode back worh him to Utah in 2012. We been to so many cons together. This fellow kitsune and I have been thru some rough times together, but we I dont think anything will get between us. Might have some tiffs, but we always say sorry the next day. Unless involves WORMs.
I also met lilbluefoxie met her for a minute at AC 2014 in the hallway. Then in August she noted me. Got to meet her in 2015 when my trip to ac took a huge detour by damned accident to NYC. I wish we had nore then a few hours. And after that I been doing my best to make her happy and feel loved thru the thick of it. Proud of you pudge. Remember your ass will make the best bongos, and I will always try to suck our your soul. *winks*
Then around mid 2017 I meet lucidum here on via a few notes, and a bit of telegram. but it didnt pick up to Christmas that year about the time I lost my horrible job. The only one I managed in this decade. X.x. but since then me and her have been insperable and helped each other thru the dark times. You my favorite boobieburd. <3
vampiredraculina I been friend for ever and finally got to meet. That has been so wonderful. We need to get more pokemon and arbys!
lexiegreywinds I was happy to meet you. Too bad it was for 20 minutes and 15 of that was in line waiting for a shitty undercooked sandwich.
sh0tty 
kuraianubis and possibly so many more I have yet to meet, but been so glad that have been in my world, life, and more. I need to meet you all some day <3
flyingfire I am sorry what happened between us. I miss you. And if you ever can find it in your heart to forgive me..... I would be happy to hear from you again.
shyunicom83 we left on less then good terms. I did love you at some point. I look in on you from time to time to see if your ok. I doubt you will ever see this, but I really do wish you the best.
Now that I have the people out of the way. Let's count the large things to have happened.
Moved: 2 times. That may seem odd. But I have moved 35 times!
Phones: 5. I try so hard to keep my technology for the long haul. But I am the phone killer.
Computers: 5. Same as above. Built my game rig and it's been going strong since 2018.
Conventions: 21. With AC the most. Tff close behind. And mff being on my ban list.
Cars: 5. 1 I killed in a pond, 1 drove into the ground, 1 having to be pretty much abandon, 1 being a lemon, and one I am driving into the ground.
Loses in family: 2 that I can say matter. My Grandmother in 2018 super early on. Andy mates mom during this summer.
Jobs: 1. And that was a shitshow. Hey if You are reading this tell mommy to stop being your girlfriend. And you know who you are.
Roadtrips: shit.... too many. Mostly from home to Knoxville. A few for cons. A number for moving or helping bluekitsune
Fursuits: 2. Both where partials only. The head made by 
crystumes the first died due glasses falling off and destroying the muzzle. The second incarnation is retired mostly due to a worn out jaw.
Key points of this last few years.
I made amends with my father. We when I left home back in 2004 were on pretty much hit with car if we saw one another. But during the last 10 years I was able to slowly make a connection. I was officially allowed back into the house in early 2014 for my gma's 80th birthday. And well since then it got better. Now we are talking without problems. Mean we will never call each other on the phone and talk just to talk. But we can have a dinner. Watch tv, and such. This to me is one of the most important things to happen.
I nearly died due to a massive blood infection that continues to effect me. I am not able to br as active as I used to be. I can't do the cold like I did. that saddens me most.
I kind of pulled back from the fandom in a sense of that the new generation of furs. And the drama kind makes me less active here, and some other places. I will never quit the fandom. This is my life and I will always be a proud fur.
As for anything else. Well there isn't much. I am a survivor. I am getting by.
Love you all. Thank you for going on this journey with me. And I hope these coming years are kind to all of you. I dont know when I will be on again. But if you ever need me. I am on telegram almost 24/7. I enjoy making friends. Specially those who wa t to be here for the long run. <3 
nickada
bluekitsune
vampiredraculina
lexiegreywinds
sh0tty
kuraianubis
flyingfire
shyunicom83
crystumesToday. Is my birthday.
General | Posted 6 years agoYup. I am officially 35 now. Still putting up with the world.
Thank you all my friends thank you all for being in my life. <3
And all I really would like is maybe some art. *smiles* but stull always accepts anything anyone wants to share.
Need to also clarify. I am tired. So if sounds bad is because brain screwed if up.
Thank you all my friends thank you all for being in my life. <3
And all I really would like is maybe some art. *smiles* but stull always accepts anything anyone wants to share.
Need to also clarify. I am tired. So if sounds bad is because brain screwed if up.
Dog needs help. She needs surgery
General | Posted 6 years agoShe miss guessed a jump the other day and has been limping since. Took her to the vet since not eatting, threw up some, and barely able to walk.
She is going to need a possible $1,000 usd surgery.
I made her a GoFundMe with pics of the documentation the vet gave me about what she needs.
https://www.gofundme.com/f/surgery-....._co_campmgmt_m
If you can't help. Please spread the word. This is to help keep her life as best she can.
She is going to need a possible $1,000 usd surgery.
I made her a GoFundMe with pics of the documentation the vet gave me about what she needs.
https://www.gofundme.com/f/surgery-....._co_campmgmt_m
If you can't help. Please spread the word. This is to help keep her life as best she can.
Homeworld.... 3!!!
General | Posted 6 years agoOmg *squees* one of my favorite game series is getting an officL 3rd.
Now come on half-life. You two are the same age. You can pull off the big number 3....
Now come on half-life. You two are the same age. You can pull off the big number 3....
Attention Homeworld fans! I NEED THIS...
General | Posted 6 years ago *Insert spongebob's I need it gif*
Today browsing reddit and found something I, well, need in my life:
https://brickformation.com/individual/751771
Omg. I am a HUGE of the Homeworld game collection for around 2 decades now. And this is one of those.... *let's out a long sigh* never gonna see it.
I would give near anything I have for one. Quiet dreams.What has become of the fandom?
General | Posted 6 years ago Today. For no reason other then because they could.... I was told I should be thrown in a fire-pit and have acid poured on me. By another fur whom I don't even know.
This is why I don't pertake in much of the furry world these days. I have my friends. I have those I down right love. But the random asshole furs these days are really making it worse.
I live on telegram almost excllusviely. So to be in the middle of a group and told fuck off and die really..... gets to me. I just. I just want my friends, and I miss the old furry fandom where it was about love. NOT sex. Not all the drama you can muster, or create? I mean for fuck sake I decided that I don't even want to goto a con because no one there I Can connect to, and well..... Why go when you feel more threatened then having fun.
I'm getting more and more depressed each day. I've pulled back into myself. I hurt more often then not. I just want to do my models and you know..... be wanted by someone. I know only 3 or 4 people who honestly make a effort with me. the rest of the time..... *curls up* I feel utterly ignored or dismissed.
what caused the fandom to decide that bashing others, how much sex you can have, or how fast you can get a suit makes you more important. Years ago you could be anything you wanted, and you know what happen: Thats amazing! Be you! Now..... Oh another fox? So how wide is your asshole? Look she's a vixen: How big are your tits?
When did we allow hate to the norm? We have enough of that in the real world. *looks down a bit teary* I want everyone to love each other, and get along. We live anoymously behind our screens and keyboards. We goto cons, and its the furs we are.... Not who we really are that everyone knows. If your a dick in Real life.... Leave it at the bloody door.
I feel closer to stepping away from the furry world, and keeping in touch with my friends, and those I do care about. I mean. What would you do if you saw the thing you lvoe most turn in to cyse pool of hate, anger, and hate. And I can say I seen the best of what this fandom can offer. I've been around for over 20 years. I've seen love and caring. I've seen people throw money at people who are starving. Homeless, in need. but now its "Help I need a fursuit" "Look at my $5,000 ych.... Your going to buy it." "Oh you don't know what that is? Then you don't desreve my time." "Burn in a pit of fire"..............
Bring back the love. Bring back the support your friend. bring back the everyone is equal.
don't let the old guard be phased out and watch what they grew up burn away.........
love you. I don't know when I'll honestly be back..... I may quietly lurk. I don't know right now.
I also really could use my friends...... 