'Sup.


Y'all like my gallery?

















(spoiler alert: all past art is safe and sound in the scraps section)

Trust me, this is the sort of group project anyone would like!


My buddy  decadencewolf is hosting a super steamy, super sexy YCH. The artist will be  Zourik


Check it out!


https://www.furaffinity.net/view/26867672/
https://www.furaffinity.net/view/26867672/
https://www.furaffinity.net/view/26867672/
https://www.furaffinity.net/view/26867672/

I'm breaking up with my fiance.
I'm leaving the furry fandom.
I'm rediscovering religion.
I'm renouncing my homosexuality.
I'm going to prove the world is flat.
I'm in love with avocado toast.
I'm actually a 14 year old asian kid.
I'm pursuing my dream of being an exotic dancer.
I'm never using Twitter ever again.
I'm a YouTube sensation.



I'M A GIRL

...... this $10 bill on the table. It better still be there when I come back!

....and you're inclined to believe them right away without hearing my side of the story... you go right ahead and believe them.

I'm way too old and tired to even care anymore. I also don't have to explain or prove myself to anyone.

Yup yup. That's a thing I'm going to, yup.

And trying to rectify the situation is an exercise in complete and utter futility.






But I guess that's life.

And I have to just accept it.

And I have to move on.

Check it out!


https://www.furaffinity.net/view/26493358/
https://www.furaffinity.net/view/26493358/
https://www.furaffinity.net/view/26493358/
https://www.furaffinity.net/view/26493358/

I could practically hear the massive waves of disappointment with each picture I uploaded.

I could practically hear the massive waves of disappointment with each picture I uploaded.

Best pizza topping.






Amirite guys? Yeah? Yeah? :D

Fite me.

So over the last few months, I'd gotten to talking with a bunch of delightful folks and we'd decided to get art together.


A promise is a promise, and I never back down from those.




Awesome peeps I promised I'd get art with:

ALL PROMISES FULFILLED




I probably forgot someone, which is par for the course for me. Send me a reminder if you're out there!

Not gonna lie, this journal is probably more a personal reminder to me. Once I go past two or three people to remember, my memory turns to shit.













After the promised art is done... well... not sure were I'll be going from there.


I can tell you this, though - 2018 will probably be my slowest art year (compared to previous years). Sorry to disappoint.

Yeah. That.

Please party responsibly and be safe!

I'm not really the religious sort....


BUT


I can understand the significance that this holiday and this time of the year holds for a lot of you... a time for self reflection, peace, spirituality, coming together, etc.... and yes, even that religious thing.

And so I say HAPPY HOLIDAYS to you wonderful lot, be it Christmas, Hanukkah, Kwanzaa, or Festivus for the rest of us.





Be safe and merry and, most importantly, be most excellent to each other.

That's it.

All uploaded.

Everything current.

All caught up.

Done.

Finally done.



No more submission spam from me, flooding your inboxes or feeds or whatever.


Again, I want to apologize to everyone that unwatched me because of this flood.... even though they'll never see this.


For those curious, the final tally:

2009: 2 submissions
2014: 260 submissions
2015: 297 submissions
2016: 143 submissions
2017: 137 submissions










Now if you'll excuse me, I'm going to go crawl under a rock and DIE (but only until the new year).


Have a wonderful and safe New Years.

*dies*

So to put things into perspective....

As far as art goes, 2014 and 2015 were insane... INSANE years for me. I was commissioning artists fucking left and right with no indication of ever slowing down.


I am going to say it right now so there's absolutely no confusion or misunderstanding:





IT WAS AN ADDICTION







There you go. All out in the open.

I'm not naive. I knew it was an addiction. Probably most of you knew this as well. I was riding that train until the last stop. Only I didn't get to that last stop. The bridge was out. And the train fell right into the ravine.

In mid 2016, I started feeling a financial strain. My bank account had depleted and I had begun tapping into my savings. And I kept commissioning art. I even broke the cardinal rule of never using my credit card to make a purchase.

Finally I stopped. But not because I realized what I was doing... oh no. Not at all. I stopped because the money was gone. All of it.


By this point, we were rolling into early 2017. I finally stopped to think about what I was doing. I looked through my finances and what I was earning from my job and decided that needed to be done:

1) I needed rebuild my savings first before anything else. I started taking a significant (but not crippling) amount from each paycheck and putting it back into my depleted savings account. I made a promise NEVER to touch this account except for ACTUAL EMERGENCIES.
2) Focus on paying my debts, rent, bills, food, etc without having my bank account reaching single digits (and possibly dip into the negatives). That occurred way too much while I was commissioning art like it was going out of style.
3) AFTER all that was settled, any extra money I had was fun money. Eating out, buying games, saving for trips and cons, and even buying ART.... yes art. I enjoy art still.

I became much more methodical about it all. It also made me a much more stingy bastard. Artists that I would have easily thrown $200 at in the past, now I had to think twice about. I was (finally) thinking about the future. Sadly, it also meant that a lot of artists that I would commission frequently, I could no longer buy from.

Once upon a time, I felt compelled to give artists as much of my money as possible to support them, because they needed it. Nowadays, however, I've come to realization that these artists are doing perfectly fine without my support. There's so many other people are supporting them. This makes me happy..... and relieved. I can actually focus on my own well being for a change.

It's never a good idea to go out of your way to help someone if it's going to impact you in a negative way. Great. You helped someone pay their rent for the month. But now your rent is due and you're lacking money (because you gave it away).


Yeah. That's the kind of person I was.



Anyway, thanks for reading (or not). I just mostly typed up this long ramble as a means of self-therapy.





Whatever. I dunno. Back to the smut.








The lesson here: Learn from my mistakes... DON'T DO THE STUPID SHIT I DID

With my motivation to upload the rest of my art currently flushed down the toilet......

AND with this upload SNAFU that this website is currently experiencing.....


Should I just upload the rest of my art (everything from 2016 and 2017) onto Dropbox and call it a day? Or would guys prefer to see it here?

And that marks all the art I commissioned through 2015.





Meanwhile.... I just found out my fiance has been suspended from FA for a week... so right now I'm pretty fucking livid. It's the same shit from August all over again.



Am I going to wipe out my gallery? I don't know. But don't fucking tempt me.




Am I going to continue uploading the remaining art I have? I dunno. Maybe. Maybe not. I'll revisit this question when I'm more.... level headed. One thing's for sure... I might not be keeping my promise to get everything uploaded before 2018.










Ciao.

#SorryNotSorry


It'll all be over soon, folks. I promise. Entire backlog will be uploaded before 2018 hits.






And to those that unwatched me because my spamming got so unbearable.... I'm really really sorry......... not that you'd see this journal anyway.

But I'm still sorry!

My friend  Destova is in a bit of a financial bind. A medical condition caused him to be bedridden and miss an entire week from work. He set up a GoFundMe and is seeking donations.

Yeah, yeah, I know. You see dozens on journals like these each day. But I still want to reach out to those of you who can spare a little and help him out. $1, $2, $10. Doesn't matter. Every little bit helps.


Here is his journal:
https://www.furaffinity.net/journal/8524211/
https://www.furaffinity.net/journal/8524211/
https://www.furaffinity.net/journal/8524211/

Here is his GoFundMe page:
https://www.gofundme.com/help-after-medical-issues
https://www.gofundme.com/help-after-medical-issues
https://www.gofundme.com/help-after-medical-issues



Thank you. For taking the time to read this. And for donating if you do.

Going to see if I can refrain from commissioning artists until the New Year. Money's tight this month (again) so hopefully that'll help keep me motivated.





Art that's already been paid for and that I'm (very very very VERY VERY VERY VERY VERY VERY VERY VERY VERY PATIENTLY) waiting for doesn't count.







Anyway, enjoy the art spam. Kicking into overdrive to maintain my promise (to myself) to be fully caught up by the end of the year.

Another day of spamming. 301 submissions total so far. I think about one third done. Damn, if I stay motivated, I might actually get all this done by the end of the year.







Hopefully............


























HOORAY FOR MOOD SWINGS.

Well, now I'm all caught up with uploading all the art I got in 2014... I think.


There might be a few stragglers that I missed. I'll upload them as I find them




But for now, this is 2014.






And there's going to be a lot more from 2015....

And 2016...........


And.... 2017................ >_>



And probably 2018 if I don't get caught up before the end of the year.






ANYWAY. Spam's over. For now.