So I'm getting an ear infection. I know a lot of people gripe about "self diagnosing," but I've had enough ear infections to know what the beginning of one feels like. lol This one is already off to a terrible start. I'm going to try to hold out for Tuesday since I'm going to a Ear, Nose, and Throat specialist anyway. Otherwise, popping general over the counter NSAIDs(Non-steroidal Antiinflammatory Drug) like Advil.

I'm sketching, but just about had a breakdown and had a small one today. I'm hating my work and feeling like I'm no longer improving. I'm resketching the same pieces over and over and afraid to show them to the commissioners because I feel like I'm going to disappoint them... Disappointing a commissioner is worse than disappointing myself because I like making people happy. Especially with my art.

I also got an email that cut deep comparing me to another artist and being told that I was "almost as good" as them but way cheaper so I'm the "better option financially speaking." .... Yeah, getting nervous and anxious and breaking down may be an overreaction but I've been dropped into a void of self loathing I'm having a terrible time escaping. I haven't eaten today and can't bring myself to as I've felt so sick since last night over this.

To whoever sent the email, I know you probably didn't mean to hurt me and this is more than just what you said. Just please try not to speak like that to any other artist. It's hurtful whether you realize it or not.

Anyway... My mom encouraged me to take a break and watch a movie, "Big Eyes." My heart was stolen by this movie and Margaret Keane's story. It's just... Artist and art appreciator alike should watch it. Heck, movie enthusiasts should watch it!


Well, have a great week, guys.

Sooo, some generous neighbors helped my mom and myself put up a sturdier fence and a stronger hot wire (sorry to anyone against these, but the cows have broken through and ignored the older wire multiple times in the last few days alone.) I'm hoping this fixed our wandering aggressive cow problem.

I'm exhausted still but I should get a reasonable amount of things done in the next few days. Sorry again, guys. I'm only human and these past few days have nearly ruined me lol

Also, I finally was set up for a tonsillectomy consultation on the 28th. So I should hopefully have a surgery date in the near future.

And a final sorta-kinda-maybe note: I think I've figured out some cool techniques in my head. That could be exhausted delirium talking to me (seriously thought up a children's horror film the other night like that's something in demand) but hopefully when rested the ideas will still be good. xD


Have a great week, guys! I'm gonna go pass out now

Sooo, the past few days, I've had to chase cows, repair barbed wire, and a hot wire. More than once each day.

We also have a sick horse we're nursing, but he doesn't look good. And we can't afford a $1000 minimum (we're sure he'll need hospitalization at least a day or two). We even called the ASPCA that cares for horses and said that since we're doing what we can it's not abuse and they can't seize the horse and even if they weren't full, it would be $450 to turn him over to them.

I apologize for the continued delays, but I'm exhausted and pass out shortly after a shower and meal pretty much.

I've gotten a little done on artwork, but nothing worth a WIP, although if you really want it, I'll get it to you as soon as I'm at my computer (posting from my phone).

I'm trying, I promise. I'm just stressed and exhausted.

I'm sorry...

Have a great weekend guys.

Please? *insert puppy eyes here*: http://www.furaffinity.net/journal/6887576/

(Also I'm running out to the pasture to help my mom. Be back in a few hours)

Hey! So I've heard lots of people wanting Slumber Party and Camping themed stuff so here's your chance for chibi fun!
These are first come first serve, BUT if you don't keep in contact and don't pay within 48 hours, the slot is freed up again.

Also, please read my ToS:
http://www.furaffinity.net/journal/6884969/


Slumber Party Slots (min:5; max:10):
1. Lapsa
2. Lapsa
3. Manonthemoon
4. Lapsa (gift for someone else)
5. Lapsa (gift for someone else)
6.
7.
8.
9.
10.


Camping Fun (min: 4; max:8)
1. Dessertranger
2. Chains
3. Manonthemoon
4.


Please fill this out for the proper slot:

Slumber Party Clothing (pics appreciated):
Character Ref:
Preferred Slumber Party Antic?(pillow fight, gossip, movie watching, etc):


Camping Clothing (pics appreciated):
Character Ref:
Preferred Camping Activity (scary stories, roasting marshmallow/weenie, etc.):


You may claim however many slots you'd like.
Please be nice, I promise there will be more opportunities in the future.
Please put all the info necessary in the comments so I can keep track and reference everything from one spot rather than a dozen or so notes.

Thanks, guys! Have a great night/day and week!

I'm one day behind (migraine since Sunday afternoon with varying intensity), but tomorrow is clear for work and my butt pillow came in.

Okay, this isn't a real "here's your sign" story, but it has similar logic to those lol

Neighbors have been checking on us pretty much every day since the bull incident. A particular couple down the road has been stopping by especially and offering support.

The husband is sarcastic and funny and enjoys picking on my sister (she's gullible lol). The young son (age 5) is a hoot and prefers to hug my butt off thigh for whatever reason lol. The wife is sweet but... The things she says sometimes.


Me: *mentions I'm going to have to have my tonsils taken out*
Her: Oh, you really shouldn't have waited so late.
Me: ... What do you mean? Is it that big of a difference between 18 and 21?
Her: No, but you should have had them taken out around age 8 or so.
Me: But that would've been up to my parents.
Her: Yeah, but if you needed it done you could have asked.
(Everyone including her husband stares at her)

I have no idea what was going on in her head but nothing she said was with a menacing tone. She really thought it was helpful advice or something xD

I'm like... I need them out. They're constantly swollen (without pain except when I swallow too big of a bite or something) and hindering my eating and drinking occasionally. So, whether it's harder on me because of my age or not, it's gotta happen.

But yeah, we have a neighbor with a curious way of thinking. lol

(P.S. Her son's name is Cash, what do you guys think of a name like that? Nothing too mean please.)

Hello All! I saw someone suffer some terrible issues recently in a dispute with a commissioner so this is just a formality to protect myself and my commissioners.

-At this time, I only accept PayPal payments in USD through Goods and Services (please check the "no address needed" box if the item does not need shipping AND leave the notes blank)
-I have the right to refuse service to anyone for any viable reason (rudeness/disrespect included)
- Refunds are ONLY available BEFORE the image is flat colored
- Only 50% of the refund is available if the linework is complete (you have to have approved a sketch before I even get to this stage)
-I do have ill family I live with in addition to my own health problems. Commissions may take time (not 6 months or anything but 6 weeks is a possibility at times, just talk to me, I'll try to get it to you as soon as I can)
-You may enquire about your commission status at any time, but unless I'm online at that moment, expect hours to a day for me to respond.
-Technical difficulties are a very real possibility. This is something that will halt production until I receive a new part or item as it's impossible for me to work without necessary tools. This is not something I can work around until the item is replaced or fixed, please be mindful of that.
-With adopts, do not alter the original piece I give you. Do not instantly sell it for more without additional artwork. Do not claim to have made the design.
-Under no circumstances is someone other than the commissioner of a piece to repost said piece without written permission.
-Under no circumstances is someone to claim my artwork or characters as theirs.
-Under no circumstances is someone to trace, copy, or distribute my artwork.
-Please be respectful to my watchers, friends, and myself. Repeat disrespect will lead to being blocked.


Thank you for your time.

If you have any questions about my ToS, please note me or ask in comments below.

Okay, I'm awaiting info from a couple of peeps on edits and such. I'm dedicating as much as I can stand (to sit that is) to the final set of comms.

I have a special cushion coming in that should help me with my currently sore behind (dog freaked, knocked me out of chair a few days ago) and my sciatica. It's expected to come in Monday or perhaps Tuesday. So I would say the absolute latest should be Wednesday or Thursday on the commissions.

This does not include my 5+ page comic commissoner or art slave peep (although art slave will get several pieces if we keep a good pace on approving stages). I'm sorry, I primarily mean individual commissions.

You MAY note me if you're interested in claiming a commission spot (closing after 8 peeps commission me and will reopen once their stuff is done) but I won't start on a sketch or accept payment from new commissioners until these current pieces are done.


Thanks guys! Have a great week!

I have a little bit of leather coming in. So I want to attempt making a collar or some other accessories for a fur suit.

IF you and your suit are very small framed, then feel free to request an attempt at a leather harness. The shape is up to me.

Otherwise: collars, bracelets/anklets, and perhaps a simple strap muzzle or horse halter

You can request a color but I can't guarantee that I get my hands on that color leather dye/stain.

So to start with, answer this:

Fursuit height:
Fursuit frame (narrow, wide, petite, however you'd describe it):
Item You Want:
Item Color:
Fursuit pic (optional):

I'll be picking and choosing later. Only 1-2 projects will be chosen. Sorry.

I love flowing along with certain themes. :) I'd like to see what sorts of things you guys would like to see.

Some YCH's may pop up, if not, then there may be specials with the theme.

So... Gimme your favorite themes! owo

Soooo, I have some basic leather stuff, I'll be buying more and family has promised that once my birthday/Christmas come along I'll get Visa or MasterCard prepaid gift cards if they don't understand the items I'm wanting for leather working.

I'll make at least one version of most items myself both as an example of proof that I can make that particular item and to figure out any difficult parts.

Things I have made before (no visual examples at this time, but I'll make some before these are available):

Collars (human and custom dog and cat)
Leashes
Bracelets (both band and braided style)
Belts
Bullwhip (I imagine I'll be able to make floggers and crops)
Leather Plaques
Saddle bags and other small saddle accessories


Things I HAVE NOT made but want to someday:
Boots
Saddles
Fursuit accessories (harnesses, muzzles, etc.)
And bedroom accessories


Any thoughts? Anything anyone would consider purchasing?

I'm not a pansy! I swear! This video just attracts ninjas cutting onions or something...

*tries not to cry, cries a lot*: https://youtu.be/wlFiMoCbVMQ

Just... wow. The video makes me kind of happy to be an organ donor, although I know nothing mystical would happen.

Animals and elderly people get to me in movies a bit because I do think (please don't let them die). BUT that being said, I have only teared up at a movie and that was the opening of "UP."

So.... Be honest... Does the video make you tear up?

Someone shot my mom's bull. Not joking. They blew his face off.

We keep to ourselves. We're always polite. We don't hurt anyone.

They came onto the property and just shot him. Why? He was very docile and the police and farmer's agree that he was shot while getting a drink.

Unfortunately, the police can't do anything legally. It was a shot gun so nothing definitive can be pulled out to prove that we didn't shoot him.

This bull bred their cows. This was part of their livelihood. Not to mention my mom was really attached to him.

I'm so sick. I'm super depressed. Why do we have a target on our back?

My sister is bullied. My step brother was jumped a few months back (we had video proof and the courts dropped the case before there was even a trial). Someone tried to run me down when I was on a walk. Now this...

I'm just... I don't know why life is worth living some days... This is one of them...

I'll be fine. Just be aware that I may not respond to messages and such quickly.

Be safe, guys.

So... I went to sit down, and there was a flash of thunder which sent my great pyrenees mix headed for my computer chair, which is fine when I'm already in the chair. But it was knocked just enough that it slid the rest of the way and I hit the ground. Hard. on my butt.

I'm in excruciating pain and going to call it a night. I thought I'd pound everything out and be finished by friday, but nope.

So things will be pushed back a few days as I don't see me being able to sit for long periods of time right now or for the next couple of days. So things will get done, just a little more slowly.

Goodnight all. Be safe. Protect your butt.

Cookies from Subway (the restaurant) are seriously the best I've ever gotten from a fast food place.

How did Jared avoid these delicious bishes? They rock! Especially the peanut butter ones! I'm not even a big fan of peanut butter cookies, but Subway adding the peanuts and peanut butter chips. O.M.G. The chocolate chip is second and the white macadamia nut ones are third.

I seriously went in just for cookies yesterday (had already had lunch and needed a cookie fix, don't judge me) and the chick looked at me like I was mental. xD

Anyone else have favorite fast food sweets that are way better than anything that should be served by fast food places?

Also, my favorite sub from there:

wheat bread
meatballs and pepperoni with mozzarella and onion and bell peppers added BEFORE toasting
then spinach, a bit of jalapenos and Parmesan to top it off!

^ if it sounds good, try it. It's amaze-sauce.

Have a great week guys!

This is just a heads up and things are subject to change between now and then.

Here are the themes I have in mind:

SFW OR NSFW Summer Love Pieces:
This is for watchers that don't care for the adult stuff as well as those that want a passionate summer themed piece.

Strippers/Exotic Dancers:
Yep, awesome and sexy theme costumes a NSFW and SFW (if the costume covers everything lol) version of each picture for free. I'll play with lighting and such (colored lighting and such I mean) unless asked not to.

Bondage/Fetish Gear:
I'll have a list of bondage and Fetish gear and two slots available per item. Any gender except for items clearly meant for a specific type of genitalia (c*** cage for instance).

Chibis in Space!:
This won't be limited to chibis since I just want to practice space backgrounds. Chibis will be the cheapest, but various other options such as regular anthro and ferals will be accepted.

And....

Icon Commissions Will Open for the first time!
Say wut? Yeah, I want to give 'em a shot. And since they may not be super fantastic, they'll be really cheap but only a small batch will be allowed. So if this interests you, keep your eyes peeled Friday.

You know and may have known for a long time (like me) that you're over your ex, but that they've damaged you to the point of having panicky knee jerk reactions in your current relationship.

It's kind of depressing, but not the worst thing ever.

I've realized that when friends and especially my mate give really short answers, my brain doesn't instantly think "Oh, they're busy." Instead of goes into panic mode and I start thinking I've done or said something wrong and now they're mad. So... I've been conditioned by my ex.

There's other things but roughly the same thing. My ex's behaviors have conditioned me to react to totally not negative reactions like they are and I panic and beg for forgiveness when I've done nothing wrong.

I may be 100% over my ex (meaning I don't want to be with him ever, ever, ever, ever x1000 again) but the damage of the unhealthy relationship is there. I'm going to have to figure out how to work through it somehow.

Sorry guys. I'm not looking for sympathy, I just had a semi-profound moment. lol

Have a great weekend!

Okay, I'm working on 3 types of new commissions in a new chibi style I'm going to affectionately call "Sweet Tooth." They'll be pastel/pastel goth style chibis regardless of whether "sweets" are involved (though that's the main idea.

I'd like to take a few of these to do tonight then I'll get back to the rest of my commissions.

Here are the basic themes/types:

Sweet Tooth Dessert Surprise:
This is basically a (usually feral) chibi of your character "hiding" in a dessert. IE: in a hot chocolate/cappuccino bath with foam/whipped cream "bubbles", a "scoop" of your character in an ice cream dish with ice cream toppings (hot fudge, whipped cream, sprinkles etc), popping out of a cupcake, etc.

Sweet Tooth Duds:
Chibi in food clothing or food inspired clothing. This will pretty much be a wing it, just link me a picture of the dessert and whether it inspires the clothing or IS the clothing.

Sweet Tooth Chibis:
Cavity inducing sweet looking chibis. Posed innocently and cutely (though I'm not against a hidden dark side such as a blood splatter version of the pic lol)

Sweet Tooth Pinups (not chibis):
Regular Pinups but with a different lining style (not plain black lines) and a possible Land of Sweets theme like a candy nurse (spoon full of sugar makes the medicine go down), candy striper (or stripper >.>), ice cream scooper (<.< or y'know, stripper), and of course a sexy twist on cute and innocent themes (pigtails, stuffed animals, etc. etc. etc.)


Any other cute things work for me as well. I just need cute in my life tonight.


I'm taking 2 max of each of the above for now, but only the first 4 to claim something get a guaranteed 24 hour turn around.

Please feel free to Claim a slot then reply to your own comment with the form filled out (I know some type slow:

Commission Type:
Character Name:
Character Gender & Body Type (male- femboy, female- chubby, etc):
Character Ref(s):
Theme:
Props, Accessories, or Dessert References:

Thanks guys!

Okay, I'm fascinated by double peened critters like sharks and some snakes. So you can offer up your shark or snake for this. I'm partial to cobras and constrictors, so you have a better chance there if it's one of those. Sharks can be any. I'd also like to try fairly extreme size difference, so feel free to apply for that too (like 8-9 foot character with a 4-5 foot character; either gender combo).

Please keep these things in mind:
There are other freebies ahead of you and beyond that, paid commissions come first.
I haven't really drawn snakes or sharks much, so everything about them is fairly new and experimental
Do. Not. Bug. About. Your. Piece. These are freebies. I'd like to get your character correct, but pose, and everything else is up to me (though you can suggest a theme or background) including time frame, so please be patient. I have people waiting months for their freebies.
Please be respectful and at least say "thank you" when you receive your piece. It's kind of heartbreaking to work hard on something, show it to the character owner, and just get "okay" in response to its completion (of worse, no response at all)


Okay, so the quick form:

Applying for (snake/shark/size difference):
Character ref (s):
Would you like one of my characters to be in the piece with yours?:
If yes to the above, preferred gender of my character?:
Any requests? (Not guaranteed, but will be considered):

Thanks guys!

Lord have mercy... *fans self* XXL is waaaay hotter than the original. Phew!

It inspired me though. So as soon as my paid queue is clean, expect Magic Mike "cosplay" YCH's and stripper/exotic dancer specials lol

If the Magic Mike YCH'S spoil anything, it will be outfits and bits of the ending dance skits (which you can probably see online already anyhow). So no worries.

Also, I just want to clarify that I'm not one of the ladies interested in the movie just for Channing Tatum. In fact... my minor daddy issues show through a bit *coughs* >.>

xD Anyway... So they'll probably open this weekend sometime. And a special surprise July 4th... probably... I'll have to test a few things first. x3

Have a great week, guys!

Wednesday, July 1st:
Finish Pinups
Comic Sketch stage approval
Full Approval on Khzhak's breeding pics (maybe some lining)
Lining Chain's (abbreviating name, sorry) reaction pic and child ref

Thursday, July 2nd:
Complete Khzhak's breeding pics (if approval is granted)
Sketch Khzhak's reaction and child pieces
Complete Lapsa's last pic

Friday:
Sketch/line Otterman89's pieces
Complete reaction and child ref pieces


I know I may not get everything done on the days listed, but it's something to shoot for and hopefully my paid commission queue will be clear before the week is up.

First off, I'd like to apologize for the things I was supposed to get out yesterday, between my mom having small seizure episodes and my air mattress ripping, I've been losing my mind the last 24 hours.

I should get all those things I promised yesterday done today so...


Are there any alternatives to an air mattress I'm not thinking of??

The floor is seriously cold so a blanket pallet is out (not to mention the back issues it would cause). There's no room for an actual bed or couch futon. This has to be something that can be put away at a moment's notice. I'm racking my brain, but no luck. =\

Thanks guys, have a great week!

I won't bother you guys with a bunch of details but basically I have occasional severe anxiety and something that I guess is kind of like PTSD. I have anxiety attacks related to these PTSD-like episodes that leave me drained and emotionally fragile for a short amount of time. That's what I mean when I say I need to emotionally reset. I just have to protect myself until I'm emotionally stable again. These episodes are typically fairly rare this point in my life so I shouldn't have another one for awhile.

Thank you for your patience. Work should pick up from tonight onwards.

Have a great week all.

Stuff happens... I know... I just need a few hours to myself later today...

I'll get the couple of breeding sketches and one pinup I owe out there, but otherwise... I'm crawling in my happy place to press reset on my demotions.

No, I don't want to talk about it, not even with friends right now. I'm just... Not myself right now, at all. I'll be fine. I just need a small chunk of time.

Thank you for your patience.


Here's a rough not very specific progress of (paid for commissions, not gifts or trades) things:

Chubby Pinups: all but one fully sketched, 2 partially lined

Breeding packages: dates and breeding pics of 2 commissioners almost fully sketched, 1 set very loosely sketched

Lapsa: 1 piece left

Hey guys! I've read "Girlfriends" by Milk Morinaga half a dozen times at least and love the sweet but realistic feeling love story. So I'd like any and all suggestions! It's a bonus if you know where I can read at least a sample for free. I'm not against buying manga *has a ridiculously large collection already* so don't be afraid of suggesting something I'll eventually have to buy to read. :)

I'm not looking for hentai, or at least hentai where the sex takes up most of the book. I actually like the plot. lol

Some general sweet love stories works too. And feel free to destroy my feels. lol


Anyways, thanks in advance and have a great week!!