Hey everyone
How are y'all..?
It's been a good minute since my last update and I'm sorry for the overall silence

I've been dealing with a lot of shitty things for pretty much this whole year and its caused my mental/physical illnesses to deteriorate even more so and faster

I don't really want to go into too much detail, but all of this is making me immensely suicidal everyday and I'm legitimately concerned for my own safety-
I have been doing long term treatment for years at this point and everything so idk what else to do
My home environment is also not healthy at all and I can't leave due to being disabled and have no other options

Too much is happening/stacking, I'm overwhelmed with everything, and I feel so trapped.. no energy for anything anymore /:

I feel really guilty talking about this and I'm sorry if this all sounds silly
I just hope this isn't forever; I want to get better so bad..
And just to clarify, I'm not asking for nor do I want pity or ass pats,
I just wanted to let everyone know that I'm alive… ish

Oh uh..
On a lighter note, tho
I've been refunding one or two people per month,
just as I planned and mentioned in one of my prior journals u_u ..
And despite all of this shit on my end,
I'm happy to say that I'm still strongly pushing to do what I said I would do
The process has been very slow, but I've been keeping up and have definitely made a larger dent on my refund list

I'm gonna push myself until everyone is refunded..

Btw,
I'm sorry, but I'm disabling comments because I can't handle anything rn /:

I hope y'all are having a good day/night, tho
Take care and be safe

hey everyone,
just wanted to make a quick update on my refunding progress (especially since I haven't said anything for a hot minute)

I sent out refunds on Jan 1st and now just sent out refunds for Feb 1st

i've been refunding the more expensive commissions first, so that when I finish those, the smallers refunds will go out faster

I've made a pretty good dent so far and am really happy about that, tbh.. ;w:
many of y'all have been immensely kind, understanding, patient, etc etc

thank y'all for everything
it helps me so much, tbh (helps to lesson my anxiety and other things

anyways...
I'm gonna disable comments,
but you can shoot me a note if you need to reach me asap
thank y'all again for being so understanding

I hope y'all are having a nice day/night ❤

hey, so i posted a journal yesterday about me starting refunds for my commission list..

I hate asking for help like this,
but I need help financially lmao..

if you wanna read the details,
you can find the journal here:

https://www.furaffinity.net/journal/8978570/
https://www.furaffinity.net/journal/8978570/
https://www.furaffinity.net/journal/8978570/

thank you... 😵

hey everyone

i've been pretty quiet/inactive here for the past few months..
I'm a bit bummed about it, but it is what it is lol

so, i've finally started sending out refunds 😵

I sent out a few refunds last month, and have done the same for this month, as well
(I'll be doing refunds like the above until I'm done)

I'm really happy to get the ball rolling, cause I want this done and then I'll be strictly following my "one commission at a time," deal from now on

I don't ever want this to happen again lmao... 😿

whew..
so, I'm really tight financially because of all of this refunding and I hate asking, but
I would really appreciate it if I could get a lil help... ofc no one is obligated to donate to me,
but it would help me immensely.. ;__:

alternatively (or both).. I wouldn't mind doing a simple full body sketchmission pin up type thingy if anyone is interested that dhdgjsjs

you can donate here: https://ko-fi.com/occecation

or see my sketchmission prices here: https://www.furaffinity.net/journal/8076859/

if y'all can't do either,
maybe a shout out would be okay? (ofc you dont have to, either lol)

anyways, any help at all would make me so happy and help me get out refunds faster (I also want to buy a few personal necessary things.. but refunds first tbh)

thank you,
I hope y'all are doing alright

also, I'm on my phone atm,
but I'll update my commission list and put a link here soon.. ;w:

gonna make this fast, sorta

i got my new computer recently,
but now my finances will be super tight for a long time probably

gonna be left with like 75$ of personal spending money per month after I buy my meds, pet supplies, etc..
so the 75$ per month will be going towards refunding my current commission list

this is going to be a slow process, but it's getting started and I'll be working on fixing my mistakes/errors on this whole issue, as well

i kept telling myself to keep trying, but I'm not getting anywhere.. 😂
it's been like this for a while now and when all of this is done,
I'm gonna be drawing for myself and slowing down a lot on commissions 😞

this journal is so messy and needed to be written sooner,
but I'm honestly not okay and this is hurting my performance/well-being /:
none of this is fair towards my commissioners, either..
need to fix all of this and take care of myself


disabling comments for this journal..

btw: refunds may push faster if I can actually sit down, draw, and y'know... not take months and actually communicate lol

we'll see how things go..

w.. would anyone be interested in a sketchmission..?
i've been drawing some lately and want to use this energy towards commission work etc


full body sketchmissions start at 50$
and full body muscle sketchmissions start at 60$

bust/thigh/waist up sketchmissions and what not are at a lower price, if you're interested at all, please let me know, we'll work out a price, etc- thank you!

if you can't get a commission,
donations would be much appreciated!

you can donate here: https://ko-fi.com/occecation

BTW, i'm gonna be writing up an update journal here real soon (about my refunds/computer situation)

any interest would make me incredibly happy, tbh... ;o:

ALSO.. if any of y'all want examples of my sketchmission quality,
you can look through my gallery or ask me in this journal!

I'm sorry for this idk what else to do

I hate asking for donations, but I need help
the link below has all the info:

https://www.furaffinity.net/journal/8846757/
https://www.furaffinity.net/journal/8846757/
https://www.furaffinity.net/journal/8846757/

my ko-fi for donations is: https://ko-fi.com/occecation

also,
I currently have a ych/obo up and the minimum money offer is 65$

https://www.furaffinity.net/view/28671645/

thank you for reading

hey everyone,
my buddy is in need of commissions/money!

what he has to other atm:

- https://www.furaffinity.net/view/27990666/ - undies ych

- https://twitter.com/sabertoofs/stat.....037683714?s=19 - fursuit tails!

his stuff is A+👌
so it would be awesome if y'all could maybe take a peek at his stuff.. :3c

I'm sorry for this idk what else to do

I hate asking for donations, but I need help
the link below has all the info:

https://www.furaffinity.net/journal/8846757/
https://www.furaffinity.net/journal/8846757/
https://www.furaffinity.net/journal/8846757/

also,
I currently have a ych/obo up and the minimum money offer is 80$

https://www.furaffinity.net/view/28494730/

thank you for reading

I'm sorry for this idk what else to do

I hate asking for donations, but I need help
the link below has all the info:

https://www.furaffinity.net/journal/8846757/
https://www.furaffinity.net/journal/8846757/
https://www.furaffinity.net/journal/8846757/

posting a reminder because i'm honestly desperate rn LOL
please bear with me T__T;;

the link below contains all the info and etc

https://www.furaffinity.net/journal/8846757/
https://www.furaffinity.net/journal/8846757/
https://www.furaffinity.net/journal/8846757/

hey everyone..
so, things have been really hectic on my end lately

gonna try to make this as short as possible, but my home was struck by lightning last week, which broke a lot of important things,
including my laptop (not only that, but me and my mum ended up getting into a mild car accident later in the same day.. i already deal with chronic pain body issues, but the accident hurt my neck really badly u_u so i need to get that checked out.. )

after the whole lightning ordeal,
my laptop would start up really slow, freeze often (like full freeze up to the point that i need to force shutdown my laptop), some important drawing files got corrupted, being rly slow, can't update laptop anymore, etc

i'm already trying to save money to refund people on my commission list, but now on top of all of this,
i'm having to deal with my laptop issues (i've also been meaning to start saving for a new computer, tho.. i just hope my laptop can be fixed into a semi workable state until i'm able to afford a new one)

like i hate to ask for this,
and i normally don't ever,
but i could really use help if possible ;_:
my ko-fi: https://ko-fi.com/occecation

idk how much help i will get from my mum and her husband, but i'd like to not put all of this mess on them sgfsdljg
i feel so guilty even thinking about it.. even though i'm sure they would have no issues helping orz

my plan is to try to fix my current laptop into a semi workable state and then try to continue saving for both refunds and a decent desktop (probably refurbished/pre-owned desktop computer, that is decent so i don't have to worry about getting a new computer too soon, and it won't kill me as badly, financially, etc)

i'm sorry if this doesn't make great sense,
i'm honestly super overwhelmed with everything that has been happening lately.. trying to get my slate clean and then all of this happens LOL... sobs
i hope this is all understandable (asking for help, i mean)

i'm a sad boy rn lol
and i hope things get better asap skdgdskjgd

ty for reading, tho
i hope y'all are doing okay and staying safe~

edit: commissions will be put on hold for now.. my laptop is getting fixed by geeksquad atm, or doing the best they can
(apparently i'll get my laptop back this coming friday, but we'll see..)

[edit]I always submit my journals at bad times, so reposting again lmao[/edit]
---
lmao,
some/most of y'all know I'm refunding my current commission list,
but idk if asking for donations is.. acceptable (not sure how to word it rip)

I'm just gonna lay my ko-fi link down below and see how things go....

https://ko-fi.com/occecation

I feel selfish, tho
because if anyone donates,
I'm not gonna give art in return /:
...
unless someone donates an extremely, pretty penny, I'll consider it.. rip

I don't want to add more shit to my list if I can help it.. and I rly hope that's understandable

anyways..
I hope y'all are having a good day/night
thanks for reading

lmao,
some/most of y'all know I'm refunding my current commission list,
but idk if asking for donations is.. acceptable (not sure how to word it rip)

I'm just gonna lay my ko-fi link down below and see how things go....

https://ko-fi.com/occecation

I feel selfish, tho
because if anyone donates,
I'm not gonna give art in return /:
...
unless someone donates an extremely, pretty penny, I'll consider it.. rip

I don't want to add more shit to my list if I can help it.. and I rly hope that's understandable

anyways..
I hope y'all are having a good day/night
thanks for reading

hey everyone,

I just wanted to let y'all know that I'm gonna start refunding a majority of my current commission list (it'll take some time because my only income aside from art, is me getting ssi/money help from the govt. - once a month and it's not a lot of money, either)

why?
because i've been declining in terms of my mental and physical health for the past few months now
I can hardly get to my laptop lately /:

I feel so bad about this, but I'm having a lot of trouble updating my commissiners regularly and just being too slow when it comes to drawing

it's unfair to my commissioners to have to wait so long and what not

I'm burnt out and I want a clean slate

I'm not refunding /everyone/, but a good chunk
after my list is cleared,
I wanna do one commission at a time and do collabs commissions with my friend from now on

I hope this is all understandable
and I'm sorry again

I need to take care of myself x__x;;

I hope y'all are alright, tho
thank you for reading~

hey, I wanted to warm up before working on bigger commissions (I've started on a few already, but I'd like to warm up regardless)

those who donate via kofi: https://ko-fi.com/occecation
will get a sketched out headshot with no flats

please comment below with your character info and the donation price if you donated

(you have to donate at least 5$.. i might be willing to add flats if you donate more than 5$)

thanks!

examples:
1. https://i.imgur.com/x6AoKs5.png (proper example)
2. https://www.furaffinity.net/view/27632760/ (ignore the text.. i'm only showing this sketch for an example)

the quality will be something like this, but cleaner

hey, I wanted to warm up before working on bigger commissions (I've started on a few already, but I'd like to warm up regardless)

those who donate via kofi: https://ko-fi.com/occecation
will get a sketched out headshot with no flats

please comment below with your character and donation price if you donated and I'll sketch out a quick headshot for you..

(you have to donate at least 5$.. i might be willing to add flats if you donate more than 5$)

thanks!

example:
https://www.furaffinity.net/view/27632760/ (ignore the text.. i'm only showing this sketch for an example)

the quality will be something like this, but cleaner

hey everyone,
i finally got my commission list all organized.. sorta LOL

https://pastebin.com/B2g8PXUb

it's not a fancy trello thing or anything like that, but this is what i can do for now (rly low on spoons lately lmao)
my next goal is to get said list set on trello (hopefully within the near future)

anyways, please take a look at my list..
let me know if you're not on there!
i'll add you to the list, etc... :o3

ALSO...
one last thing,
i am probably gonna refund a few folks..
i realize that my list is currently a lil too big for my liking.. (which is making me nervous/paranoid for many reasons)
and on top of that,
i've been having a hard time updating my commissioners and that's not fair for them (even with my chronic health issues)
so i want to fix this @_@

thanks for reading, btw
i hope y'all have a good night/day~

just making a fast journal as a reminder to myself

i finally sat down and took the time to go thru all of my notes and what not and cleaned up my commission list..
it's still messy, but it's organized to some degree.... (i hope LOL)

anyways, i'm a lil nervous about posting this publicly,
mainly because my list looks so huge, but a lot of it is minor commissions and editing stuff (multi slot ych's, headshots, etc)

whew.. took me like 2 hours to do this and hopefully i got everyone down

this list is not on a trello or anything like that, yet,
but at least it's something orz

i'll post the commission list later today when it's a more decent time,
since it's like... nearly 4 am for me o{-<

ngl.. tho
i'm thinking about refunding some of the smaller pieces.. but we'll see how this all rolls out
i'm motivated to get this list smaller

hey, I wanted to warm up before working on bigger commissions (I've started on a few already, but I'd like to warm up regardless)

those who donate via kofi: https://ko-fi.com/occecation
will get a sketched out headshot with no flats

please comment below with your character and donation price if you donated and I'll sketch out a quick headshot for you..

(you have to donate at least 5$.. i might be willing to add flats if you donate more than 5$)

thanks!

example:
https://www.furaffinity.net/view/27632760/ (ignore the text.. i'm only showing this sketch for an example)

the quality will be something like this, but cleaner

hey, I wanted to warm up before working on bigger commissions (I've started on a few already, but I'd like to warm up regardless)

those who donate via kofi: https://ko-fi.com/occecation
will get a sketched out headshot with no flats

please comment below with your character and donation price if you donated and I'll sketch out a quick headshot for you..

(you have to donate at least 5$.. i might be willing to add flats if you donate more than 5$)

thanks!

example:
https://www.furaffinity.net/view/27632760/ (ignore the text.. i'm only showing this sketch for an example)

the quality will be something like this, but cleaner

hey everyone!
how are y'all?
good I hope uwu

so,
i was thinking

one day I want my furaona(s) to be popular enough to the point of someone commissioning me to draw my own furaona's LOL

that sounds so selfish, tbh
but that would make me so happy omg

it's a goal tbh 👌
(I also want people to commission me to draw my sona's with their oc's lol)

anyways, this journal is pretty pointless,
but I wanted to put this thought down somewhere 🤔

on a random side note.. i have a ych open with one slot available
maybe consider taking a look?

thank you! (NSFW):
https://www.furaffinity.net/view/27924368/
https://www.furaffinity.net/view/27924368/
https://www.furaffinity.net/view/27924368/

thanks for reading, btw!

I hope y'all have a good say/night :o3

hey everyone
i just wanted to remind y'all that i'm open for custom sketchmissions,
not just ych's/auctions

my current list of commissions has shrunken a bit recently,
so I'd like to take a few new slots or so ;w:

if you're interested at all,
you can find the sketchmission prices/info/examples below:

https://www.furaffinity.net/journal/8076859/
https://www.furaffinity.net/journal/8076859/
https://www.furaffinity.net/journal/8076859/

thank you!
i hope everyone has a good day/night~

hey everyone!

i just recently turned 26, omgosh.. (June 21st)

I would have posted on my actual bday date, but I got busy for obvious reasons 😭😂

yeah, tho.. another year older and it seems like each furture bday is approaching faster and faster aaa

.. and I hope this isn't weird/rude to ask, but maybe considering buying me a ko-fi ? 😣

that would make me so happy, tbh orz

anyways, I hope y'all are alright
thanks for reading! 💗

hey everyone,
how're y'all?

so, i really hate to make a journal like this, but
i've had a very few stressful days that honestly left me feeling suicidal and other gross things.. ):>

i'm gonna try to make this short,
but my cat got out of our home yesterday through the front door (idk how the door got open in the first place, but it happened)
and as soon as everyone in the house noticed this,
we all went out and combed through a huge chunk of the neighborhood looking for him
and we talked to a lot of people, too
asking if they had seen him and to contact us if they did

well, we found him today, thanks to a couple of people who i traded contact info with yesterday

turns out my cat was at a neighbors backyard, two houses down from me

i contacted the person who lived at said house and got my cat back

unfortunately,
he was exceptionally dinged up..
he was bit on his left shoulder (probably by a stray cat)
and he had scratches all over him,
but thankfully this most recent friday, we got him his rabies shots and other essential shots done
regardless of this, tho, i managed to get him into a vet today asap and he was given an antibiotic shot and some pain meds to take home
(i had bathed him prior to taking him to the vet, since he is a sphynx cat, was dirty, and i wanted to clean his cuts..)


SO..
now we're all back home and he's resting
i'm pretty sure they sedated him a bit to calm him down,
because he's super pooped out for sure u__u;;

i need a few days to wind down because i just felt so ruined throughout most of this whole ordeal,
thinking that we may never see him again and i'm just so happy that he's back with us..
thanks to the caring community that we live in,
we found him right away and i just feel extremely thankful, grateful, etc


aside from this,
my birthday is coming up fast (june 21st)
so i'm also gonna be a bit busy around that time, too


i feel so bad about this regardless, tho
i know people are waiting for me to complete commissions and i'm probably going to try to work on some things even though i want to take a moment to breathe
i hope this is all understandable and once i return,
i plan on working my butt off because aside from all of this,
my mental health has been relatively okay-ish recently (i want to take advantage of this while i'm having a manic episode, essentially LMAO...)


i said i was gonna try to make this short,
but oh well lmfao

the mini hiatus could last up to a week to a week and a half
it might be cut short, we'll see

thank you for reading,
i hope y'all are doing okay <3

and also,
if this journal is all jumbly and a mess,
please bear with me njsdngfdsl