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UGH!!! WISHING HE'D LEAVE ME ALONE!!
Posted 11 years ago Okay for those who didn't know icednixes is icedaryan. Who's supposed to be my mate/husband, but because of all the crap I went though last year I filed for a divorce. Changed my phone number since my last phone died and wouldn't charge anyhow and just about blocked him on here as Icedaryan and NOW he made his name Icednixes and began to watch me AGAIN. After I posted to him on Skype to leave me alone, that I just wish for the divorce to be filed so I can get on with my life. I don't want to hear or see him EVER again and yet he's watching my profile on his new name. Right now I'm stressing out back here at my parent's house, because with my new job I'm working myself into the ground. Since even if I tried to ask him for help to pay off some of the bills he got me into, he'd not help me anyhow. I TRIED to get him to help me before from January 2013 through about July 2013 to send me money to do SOME KIND or payment for my 2010 Toyota Corolla, which was my VERY FIRST CAR, which my mother put a $6,000 downpayment on. So I feel like an ass for costing her all that money just because I was stupid and married the wrong guy. Who said they would take care of me, but only just sent me about $120 for money that was ment to support 2 people, since I had a roommate at the time as well. But even with that money it would run out near the middle of the month no matter how careful we were. I have 3 credit cards, one for 3,000 second fpr 1,200 and a third for 500. So "Woopie" -.-;
I seriously wish I could erase all of last year. Cause right now it's caused me nothing but grief and it's making me wish I never spoke with this man in the first place. It's taught me to watch who I speak with even more when online and just to stick to people who live around me if I EVER wish to date someone again. But until I'm even single again I can't do shit since I'm stuck with his last name. Every day right now it feels like I have a dagger in my chest/heart and it feels like it's killing me from the inside. Even my health feels like it's been effected from all the stress. I've been getting dizzy at work even with drinking vitamin water to try and help keep me hydrated. My friend is so worried that he bought me vitamins the last time we hung out cause he does not want to see me sick and he's known me for a while. :( I hate making my friends worry about me, especially when I know they actually care. I wish this pain would end, and all my debt to be paid off as soon as possible. Cause if I keep working myself into the ground, I don't know how long my body will last.
I seriously wish I could erase all of last year. Cause right now it's caused me nothing but grief and it's making me wish I never spoke with this man in the first place. It's taught me to watch who I speak with even more when online and just to stick to people who live around me if I EVER wish to date someone again. But until I'm even single again I can't do shit since I'm stuck with his last name. Every day right now it feels like I have a dagger in my chest/heart and it feels like it's killing me from the inside. Even my health feels like it's been effected from all the stress. I've been getting dizzy at work even with drinking vitamin water to try and help keep me hydrated. My friend is so worried that he bought me vitamins the last time we hung out cause he does not want to see me sick and he's known me for a while. :( I hate making my friends worry about me, especially when I know they actually care. I wish this pain would end, and all my debt to be paid off as soon as possible. Cause if I keep working myself into the ground, I don't know how long my body will last.
So not fun
Posted 12 years ago Well last night I had trouble sleeping for some reason. Not sure if it was due to forcing myself to stay awake till 3:30 am to watch the new Tenchi. Or if it was be cause now I had some things running through my head that was making me be serious. While I was laying alone in my bed, while having the window open a little to help with keeping my nose from drying out like crazy.
So since I could not sleep, I went downstairs to the living room and began to play Borderlands 2 and I got up the the Hero's Pass area. I stopped cause the enemies kept killing me in one certain corner so instead I saved and turned off the game. Then I tried to doze off but did not have to much luck with that either, so my roommate caught me on the couch curled up in my blanket with my pillow. Did have a nice surprise happen to me. My mate called me up but since I didn't recall the number I ignored it, only to have my room mate pick it up, telling him if it anyone looking for me I'm not home. Unless it was my mate, since I knew he'd want to talk with me. Even if I had a slight headache due to lack of sleep.
I'm feeling fine now, but just relaxing with a malt drink before bed. Since drinks like this tend to make me sleepy. So now time to get back to FX and chat before I really wanna hit the hay.
So since I could not sleep, I went downstairs to the living room and began to play Borderlands 2 and I got up the the Hero's Pass area. I stopped cause the enemies kept killing me in one certain corner so instead I saved and turned off the game. Then I tried to doze off but did not have to much luck with that either, so my roommate caught me on the couch curled up in my blanket with my pillow. Did have a nice surprise happen to me. My mate called me up but since I didn't recall the number I ignored it, only to have my room mate pick it up, telling him if it anyone looking for me I'm not home. Unless it was my mate, since I knew he'd want to talk with me. Even if I had a slight headache due to lack of sleep.
I'm feeling fine now, but just relaxing with a malt drink before bed. Since drinks like this tend to make me sleepy. So now time to get back to FX and chat before I really wanna hit the hay.
Not again!!!
Posted 12 years ago Okay I went a little past the time that I was supposed to sleep which is my usual 11pm, and I ended up staying awake till 4 am ish. Due to trying to kill a boss in Final Fantasy the one that has Lightning when she first shows up. Well he's pretty tough and is making me angry cause as soon as I think I have him he casts DOOM on me and then even though he's at HALF HEALTH I still can't get him down to where he's almost dead. I DID ALMOST have him to the point of where he was at HALF health and to where I could use Lightning's Odin Elidon, but noooooo my controller had to hit the underside of the coffee table and ACTIVATE Odin accidently!!! >.<
That got me so pissed cause I was waiting for when the guy was stunned or rather staggered so that it would do more damage to him. But as soon as I began to yawn like crazy, when I went to lay down in my bed once I hit the sheets after laying down for a while my body decided to go NOPE I'M AWAKE NOW!!! So I've been up from 4am till 12:28 pm now. Working on an upgraded drawing of Panthra, so as soon as she's done I shall post it.
That got me so pissed cause I was waiting for when the guy was stunned or rather staggered so that it would do more damage to him. But as soon as I began to yawn like crazy, when I went to lay down in my bed once I hit the sheets after laying down for a while my body decided to go NOPE I'M AWAKE NOW!!! So I've been up from 4am till 12:28 pm now. Working on an upgraded drawing of Panthra, so as soon as she's done I shall post it.
My day
Posted 12 years ago So far my day has been alright. Again I seem to be having a weird sleeping schedule, I didn't sleep until about 5 or 6 am. Then when I finally did sleep, I ended up sleeping till 7 pm, and thus which is reason why I'm still up and it's now 3:51 AM currently where I am. Which is probably going to worry my husband, when or if he reads this. Since before I moved I normally did go to sleep at around 1 Am even though it was mostly cause I didn't want to rest at the exact time my mother always told me to sleep. Especially when I knew that I wouldn't have to work usually until about 12 PM the next day anyhow. Which would of allowed me some extra sleep in time.
I do miss my family, both my mother and my father. Especially my father, I got his letter a few day's ago, telling me about how much he misses me and how he misses the way we both went out to eat or went out shopping. Just thinking about him right now is enough to bring me close to crying. Both him and me were really close or tight as it were. He taught me a lot while I lived with him while I grew up. Like how to use any of the weapons he owned and how to handle them so that I did not end up hurting myself if I wanted to use them with him. Like for instance, he owned some daggers and throwing stars. When I was about 5 or 10 we used to go into the backyard with a large pink foam board prop it up against the fence, then he'd teach me how to throw them properly. While making sure I was safe and that no one got hurt when they were tossed. I even learned how to use a blow gun. You load it with a dart then just blow through the other end. It's quite fun to do actually, I managed to accidentally cause a few of the darts to go through the top's of each other which got some of them stuck together. Until he managed to get them apart.
I'm praying to get a call back soon from one of the many places that I put in for a job. So that I can save up money to go visit my dad around the warmer months. Just so that I can give my dad a head's up and let him know that I'll be up in the area for a visit, to let him know that I wish to go out for a few good days and go fishing with him. Which means I'll have to hit up a Walmart in PA and get my fishing license once again. Which I can't wait to do, I didn't get to go fishing with my dad much when I was working with Well's Fargo. Plus there were not that many good day's to go fishing due to so many storms that we got.
About the artwork that I've posted, I hope those who are watching me right now, and those who might watch me later on down the line. I hope that you might come to enjoy my work's and if you'd like please comment. But if you don't have something nice to say, please don't say it. But if it's advice you wish to give I'll happily listen/read it and who know's maybe down the line I might do an updated drawing of the picture you commented about.
Have a good day/evening/night, wherever you are. :)
I do miss my family, both my mother and my father. Especially my father, I got his letter a few day's ago, telling me about how much he misses me and how he misses the way we both went out to eat or went out shopping. Just thinking about him right now is enough to bring me close to crying. Both him and me were really close or tight as it were. He taught me a lot while I lived with him while I grew up. Like how to use any of the weapons he owned and how to handle them so that I did not end up hurting myself if I wanted to use them with him. Like for instance, he owned some daggers and throwing stars. When I was about 5 or 10 we used to go into the backyard with a large pink foam board prop it up against the fence, then he'd teach me how to throw them properly. While making sure I was safe and that no one got hurt when they were tossed. I even learned how to use a blow gun. You load it with a dart then just blow through the other end. It's quite fun to do actually, I managed to accidentally cause a few of the darts to go through the top's of each other which got some of them stuck together. Until he managed to get them apart.
I'm praying to get a call back soon from one of the many places that I put in for a job. So that I can save up money to go visit my dad around the warmer months. Just so that I can give my dad a head's up and let him know that I'll be up in the area for a visit, to let him know that I wish to go out for a few good days and go fishing with him. Which means I'll have to hit up a Walmart in PA and get my fishing license once again. Which I can't wait to do, I didn't get to go fishing with my dad much when I was working with Well's Fargo. Plus there were not that many good day's to go fishing due to so many storms that we got.
About the artwork that I've posted, I hope those who are watching me right now, and those who might watch me later on down the line. I hope that you might come to enjoy my work's and if you'd like please comment. But if you don't have something nice to say, please don't say it. But if it's advice you wish to give I'll happily listen/read it and who know's maybe down the line I might do an updated drawing of the picture you commented about.
Have a good day/evening/night, wherever you are. :)
