FA+
Shop
The road to camps.
Posted 3 years agoAs things continue to get more hyperbolic on social media now is a good time to remember that being against the war and against Putin doesn't mean you have to join the rising fervor against everything Russian. The sanctions aren't hurting Putin but they are hurting your fellow furs and artists from Russia. You know, the people who are your friends and from who you were trying to get commissions just a month ago?
We need to tamp down this extremism the media and political class a whipping up right now because twice in the last century that kind of stuff ended up with innocent people in camps without trial.
Not just in Germany, in the "democratic" west.
In America.
We need to tamp down this extremism the media and political class a whipping up right now because twice in the last century that kind of stuff ended up with innocent people in camps without trial.
Not just in Germany, in the "democratic" west.
In America.
Theather of the Mind: Torment of the Bat
Posted 9 years agoI know 
stokerbramwells secret, inner pain.
The fact that he lives in the land of race car ya yas. (Open in new tab for music.)
I can see him standing there looking pained and saying the lyrics to the song as various images of "race car ya yas" are displayed behind him. Occasionally he'll glance to the side, seeming to look at the images and slowly shaking his head in disapproval.
At about 45 seconds in it would have him seeming to mouth the words "...the fuck are you doing?!?" (with the words captioned below) to a picture of a rusty, beat up old Ford escort (badly, with spray paint) painted like a Nascar. The having him saying "Stop it!!" to a baby with an Earnhardt "3" shaved into the side of it's hair. Finally having him holding up his clenched fists, looking up and torturedly seeming to scream "Noooo!!" next to some 'truk nutz'.
stokerbramwells secret, inner pain.The fact that he lives in the land of race car ya yas. (Open in new tab for music.)
I can see him standing there looking pained and saying the lyrics to the song as various images of "race car ya yas" are displayed behind him. Occasionally he'll glance to the side, seeming to look at the images and slowly shaking his head in disapproval.
At about 45 seconds in it would have him seeming to mouth the words "...the fuck are you doing?!?" (with the words captioned below) to a picture of a rusty, beat up old Ford escort (badly, with spray paint) painted like a Nascar. The having him saying "Stop it!!" to a baby with an Earnhardt "3" shaved into the side of it's hair. Finally having him holding up his clenched fists, looking up and torturedly seeming to scream "Noooo!!" next to some 'truk nutz'.
Fursuit Parade: A non suiters perspective.
Posted 9 years agoAs more cons are doing away with fursuit parades it kind of strikes me as counter-intuitive. The fandom is after all continuing its shift from art to suiting. But let's face it, fursuit parades are laden with issues.
I'm not a suiter myself. I've never had any desire to do it. But the fursuit parade is the nexus of any con. Whether suiter or not the whole con comes to a screeching halt for the parade.
The main problem though is that with the ever increasing number of suits, the parade is just too much. I can only imagine some old North Vietnamese officer clapping his hands at the misery suiters must go through being crammed A to B in the main room waiting for their turn. It's really not much better for us waiting for you either. We want to be there and see it. We made a point of finding out when and where it'd be and showing up yet I almost inevitably wish I hadn't.
Here's the timeline for those of us who watch the parade.
Start: *After standing in the ever thickening mass of humanity along the route for 20+ minutes* "Come on already. When are they gonna start this thing? *trying to see over the 17 people of me* Is that them? Oh finally.
1/2 way through: Man...they've got a ton of suits here...
3/4 of the way: *Looking through the dealers room to where they're still streaming in on the other side* How many are there?? If this goes on much longer I'm gonna have to back to my room and use the can. Can't get to the ones down here.
Rather than get rid of the event, 1 idea cons could try is splitting it up. If a suiters badge name starts with A-L, they're in the Friday Parade. If their name starts M-Z, they're in the Saturday one. If people want to whine that the main attendance isn't till Saturday then still split it up. Have the first 1/2 parade when the dealers den opens at 10, then the second half after everyone is back from lunch at 2pm.
Also, designate a parade photo area and have staffers physically block it off and make the people with pro photo gear be there to photograph it. Yeah everybody is gonna be taking the occasional snap with their smartphone but if you've got a $1,200 Nikon, you're a pro. This reduces the liability of their stuff getting broken by jostling parade viewers and it stops the dick move of pro photo people constantly shoving their way to the front then staying in that prime viewing area. That just causes other people who can't see to shove their way to the front and the parade corridor ends up getting smaller and smaller.
Some cons are switching to a "Fursuit Mingle" instead of a parade. This is a terrible idea. There's already an unofficial "mingle" after the parades though the correct word for it is "mob". Anyone who doesn't feel like playing linebacker just to get around, let alone see any suits, is just going to walk away.
Also another idea might be to have the suiters carry a piece of paper with their characters name writ large on it so those of us who aren't suit stalkers know what a suit/character is called.
I'm not a suiter myself. I've never had any desire to do it. But the fursuit parade is the nexus of any con. Whether suiter or not the whole con comes to a screeching halt for the parade.
The main problem though is that with the ever increasing number of suits, the parade is just too much. I can only imagine some old North Vietnamese officer clapping his hands at the misery suiters must go through being crammed A to B in the main room waiting for their turn. It's really not much better for us waiting for you either. We want to be there and see it. We made a point of finding out when and where it'd be and showing up yet I almost inevitably wish I hadn't.
Here's the timeline for those of us who watch the parade.
Start: *After standing in the ever thickening mass of humanity along the route for 20+ minutes* "Come on already. When are they gonna start this thing? *trying to see over the 17 people of me* Is that them? Oh finally.
1/2 way through: Man...they've got a ton of suits here...
3/4 of the way: *Looking through the dealers room to where they're still streaming in on the other side* How many are there?? If this goes on much longer I'm gonna have to back to my room and use the can. Can't get to the ones down here.
Rather than get rid of the event, 1 idea cons could try is splitting it up. If a suiters badge name starts with A-L, they're in the Friday Parade. If their name starts M-Z, they're in the Saturday one. If people want to whine that the main attendance isn't till Saturday then still split it up. Have the first 1/2 parade when the dealers den opens at 10, then the second half after everyone is back from lunch at 2pm.
Also, designate a parade photo area and have staffers physically block it off and make the people with pro photo gear be there to photograph it. Yeah everybody is gonna be taking the occasional snap with their smartphone but if you've got a $1,200 Nikon, you're a pro. This reduces the liability of their stuff getting broken by jostling parade viewers and it stops the dick move of pro photo people constantly shoving their way to the front then staying in that prime viewing area. That just causes other people who can't see to shove their way to the front and the parade corridor ends up getting smaller and smaller.
Some cons are switching to a "Fursuit Mingle" instead of a parade. This is a terrible idea. There's already an unofficial "mingle" after the parades though the correct word for it is "mob". Anyone who doesn't feel like playing linebacker just to get around, let alone see any suits, is just going to walk away.
Also another idea might be to have the suiters carry a piece of paper with their characters name writ large on it so those of us who aren't suit stalkers know what a suit/character is called.
Con Time!: Artist vs Attendee
Posted 10 years agoAs I get ready to go to TFF I can't help but think of the difference that goes into preparation.
Artist: "Omg omg, ummm, let's see. I've got the markers tote, the pencils tote, prisma tote, accessories tote, paper tote.... Honey! Where's the paper tote???"
Me: *Looks at duffel* "Hmm... Guess it'd be easier to pack tonight instead of before the flight in the morning."
Though when I woke up yesterday morning with a mucus factory on my face and scratchy throat, the same 6 words kept going through my mind.
I hit the Zicam like a Rosie Odnell hits a Baskin Robins though and luckily today I'm feeling somewhat better and hopefully beat it before it began. It'd rather NOT come down from 30,000ft to 600 without my ears popping again. Very unpleasant.
Artist: "Omg omg, ummm, let's see. I've got the markers tote, the pencils tote, prisma tote, accessories tote, paper tote.... Honey! Where's the paper tote???"
Me: *Looks at duffel* "Hmm... Guess it'd be easier to pack tonight instead of before the flight in the morning."
Though when I woke up yesterday morning with a mucus factory on my face and scratchy throat, the same 6 words kept going through my mind.
I hit the Zicam like a Rosie Odnell hits a Baskin Robins though and luckily today I'm feeling somewhat better and hopefully beat it before it began. It'd rather NOT come down from 30,000ft to 600 without my ears popping again. Very unpleasant.
Theater of the Mind: The 2:15 to Adulthood.
Posted 11 years agoBeing a Gen X'er I was right there in the middle of the "self esteem movement" era of raising kids and running schools. While my parents certainly weren't part of it I do remember getting "Participant" ribbons in school and such. While it's good to encourage kids, overdoing it is ultimately doing them a disservice and will end up in them learning life's lessons the hard way. 
jonas has attested to this. Below is a dramatic reenactment of that truth.
*Frame 1*
Young Jonas is ecstatic, being born along and supported (literally) by words of confidence. In this frame he on top of the words "You're fantastic!"
Narrator: "The "self esteem" movement has been around for sometime now."
*Frame 2*
In this frame Jonas has his head turned all the way up with an ear to ear smile while throwing confetti out to his sides behind the words "You're gifted!"
Narrator: "But too much unearned praise in the end becomes a disservice to the child."
*Frame 3*
In this one Jonas is sitting back as if in a recliner on the words "You're special!"
Narrator: "Not only does it spoil them, it will make their eventual trip that much harder."
*Frame 4-5*
Frames 4 & 5 are small with a narrow focus. Frame 4 is a gloved train engineers hand reaching for the whistle cord. Frame 5 is a view of a locomotives horns.
*Frame 6*
Frame 6 has Jonas looking slightly confused by a sound behind him. In very small letters getting exponentially larger is seen "yoooooouuuuuu'rrRREEEEE"
Narrator: "Because inevitably we've all got a train to catch."
*Frame 7*
We only see Jonas's back as he is turned around looking at the massive locomotive bearing down on him. It's headlights are lit up and across it's nose is written in big, block letters "REALITY". Across the entire top and bottom of the frame is extended the huge word which the horns have been blaring "NNNNNNNNNNNNNNOOOOOOOOOOOTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTT".
Narrator: "And that train, is a non-stop."
jonas has attested to this. Below is a dramatic reenactment of that truth.*Frame 1*
Young Jonas is ecstatic, being born along and supported (literally) by words of confidence. In this frame he on top of the words "You're fantastic!"
Narrator: "The "self esteem" movement has been around for sometime now."
*Frame 2*
In this frame Jonas has his head turned all the way up with an ear to ear smile while throwing confetti out to his sides behind the words "You're gifted!"
Narrator: "But too much unearned praise in the end becomes a disservice to the child."
*Frame 3*
In this one Jonas is sitting back as if in a recliner on the words "You're special!"
Narrator: "Not only does it spoil them, it will make their eventual trip that much harder."
*Frame 4-5*
Frames 4 & 5 are small with a narrow focus. Frame 4 is a gloved train engineers hand reaching for the whistle cord. Frame 5 is a view of a locomotives horns.
*Frame 6*
Frame 6 has Jonas looking slightly confused by a sound behind him. In very small letters getting exponentially larger is seen "yoooooouuuuuu'rrRREEEEE"
Narrator: "Because inevitably we've all got a train to catch."
*Frame 7*
We only see Jonas's back as he is turned around looking at the massive locomotive bearing down on him. It's headlights are lit up and across it's nose is written in big, block letters "REALITY". Across the entire top and bottom of the frame is extended the huge word which the horns have been blaring "NNNNNNNNNNNNNNOOOOOOOOOOOTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTT".
Narrator: "And that train, is a non-stop."
Theater of the Mind: Die for metal.
Posted 11 years agoGot struck with a flash of inspiration while watching Gen's stream and listening to some tunes.
Overlord Fox (
foxenawolf) is sitting in her office conferring with various minions of hers.
*Frame 1*
Darius: "I have the latest findings for you." Hands her a document folder.
OF: "Good, I'm hoping we can implement..."
Artemis walks into the room.
*Frame 2*
Artemis: "Mistress, we have a situation."
OF: "What's going on?" As Artemis attempts to grab her arm and hurry her along.
*Frame 3*
Artemis: "Monitors have captured an unknown infiltrator inside the building. He seems to be armed."
OF: "What? How did this...."
*Frame 4*
Side door they are walking towards burst open. SF is seen standing in the doorway with a crazed look.
*Frame 5*
He levels a shotgun looking device with "METAL GUN" written in AC/DC style font on the side at the terrified looking OF and attendants.
*Frame 6*
SF: "Roll n roll!!" *BLAMMMM*
*Frame 7*
A pair of black eyes squeezed shut is all that's seen.
*Frame 8*
The eyes open with a "Blink blink"
*Frame 9*
The Overload, still very alive is now slightly dripping with paint, her face painted like Gene Simmons is seen. A halo splatter of paint, the pattern extending onto the wall all around her head. Her minions at looking at her with a combination of shock and confusion as a hand "throwing up the horns" can be seen on the left side with a text bubble containing "WOOOOO!!!" above it.
*Frame 10*
SF is seen sitting next to a bum in a garbage strewn alley, clothes disheveled and looking thin but smiling as he talks to the bum.
SF: "And that's how I earned the Imperium's only open assassination contract.
This bit of insanity inspired by The Simpson's "Make-up gun" and this awesome piece of music
Also for those who don't know, the Overlord is NOT metal. Not in the slightest.
Overlord Fox (
foxenawolf) is sitting in her office conferring with various minions of hers.*Frame 1*
Darius: "I have the latest findings for you." Hands her a document folder.
OF: "Good, I'm hoping we can implement..."
Artemis walks into the room.
*Frame 2*
Artemis: "Mistress, we have a situation."
OF: "What's going on?" As Artemis attempts to grab her arm and hurry her along.
*Frame 3*
Artemis: "Monitors have captured an unknown infiltrator inside the building. He seems to be armed."
OF: "What? How did this...."
*Frame 4*
Side door they are walking towards burst open. SF is seen standing in the doorway with a crazed look.
*Frame 5*
He levels a shotgun looking device with "METAL GUN" written in AC/DC style font on the side at the terrified looking OF and attendants.
*Frame 6*
SF: "Roll n roll!!" *BLAMMMM*
*Frame 7*
A pair of black eyes squeezed shut is all that's seen.
*Frame 8*
The eyes open with a "Blink blink"
*Frame 9*
The Overload, still very alive is now slightly dripping with paint, her face painted like Gene Simmons is seen. A halo splatter of paint, the pattern extending onto the wall all around her head. Her minions at looking at her with a combination of shock and confusion as a hand "throwing up the horns" can be seen on the left side with a text bubble containing "WOOOOO!!!" above it.
*Frame 10*
SF is seen sitting next to a bum in a garbage strewn alley, clothes disheveled and looking thin but smiling as he talks to the bum.
SF: "And that's how I earned the Imperium's only open assassination contract.
This bit of insanity inspired by The Simpson's "Make-up gun" and this awesome piece of music
Also for those who don't know, the Overlord is NOT metal. Not in the slightest.
Theater of the Mind: I'll stay to the east thanks.
Posted 12 years agoIt's been a while hasn't it. Well here's a little something that came to me at work today.
*Frame 1*
SF is standing in a typical city park setting. In the distance a person is seen waving to him.
Person: "Hey Shadow!"
*Frame 2*
The person has closed the distance and it turns out to be
xianjaguar.
XJ: *smiling* "You should come over! We're...."
SF: "Oh hell no! That's the west corner of the park."
*Frame 3*
XJ: *disappointed* "So?"
*SF is pulling open the left side of his trench coat with his left hand and reaching in with his right.
*Frame 4*
SF is now holding a Taurus Judge at arms length to the side. 1/3 of his arm happens to be in the gapping maw of
tugrik who has an "Uh oh" look.
SF: "Do you see this?? I'm too damn close already."
*Frame 5*
SF: *glaring at Tugrik* "Keep moving blue boy. This snacks too high in lead for your health."
*Frame 6*
White block letters on a black background spell out "ARMED FOXES DON'T GET NOMMED" followed by the 'More You Know' star.
*Frame 1*
SF is standing in a typical city park setting. In the distance a person is seen waving to him.
Person: "Hey Shadow!"
*Frame 2*
The person has closed the distance and it turns out to be
xianjaguar.XJ: *smiling* "You should come over! We're...."
SF: "Oh hell no! That's the west corner of the park."
*Frame 3*
XJ: *disappointed* "So?"
*SF is pulling open the left side of his trench coat with his left hand and reaching in with his right.
*Frame 4*
SF is now holding a Taurus Judge at arms length to the side. 1/3 of his arm happens to be in the gapping maw of
tugrik who has an "Uh oh" look.SF: "Do you see this?? I'm too damn close already."
*Frame 5*
SF: *glaring at Tugrik* "Keep moving blue boy. This snacks too high in lead for your health."
*Frame 6*
White block letters on a black background spell out "ARMED FOXES DON'T GET NOMMED" followed by the 'More You Know' star.
Theater of the Mind: My kingdom for a breeze!
Posted 13 years agoThis is the second of 2 comics starring Sid from Lizard Beth's comic Broken Plot Device.
*Frame 1*
Sid and another pirate are leaning on the railing of their ship looking distressed.
Pirate 1: "Captain, we've stuck in these Doldrums for half a fortnight now! Should this continue much longer the crews humor will be ill indeed."
Sid: "Well what do you want me to do about it? Flap my arms and fill the sails with the breeze?"
A faint and small "Dun da da dun dun da..." is seen in the background.
Pirate 2: (off frame) "What is that sound?"
*Frame 2*
The "Dun da da dun dun da dun da da dun dun..." is seen larger and more clearly in the background now.
Pirate 1: "I'm not saying..... What is that sound?"
Sid: "What? Oh no. No no NO NO....."
Pirate 3: (also off screen but from the other side of the frame from Pirate 2) "It sounds like the Zeppelin of Led."
(*hint hint* <- clicky)
*Frame 3*
Sid is just barely seen but his voice is huge as he is starting at the bow of his ship looking down at a Viking longboat in front of his ship.
Sid: "NOOOOOOO!!"
*Frame 4*
The perspective is now looking down into the longboat as the Viking from last post looks up at him.
Viking: "Avast, puffy shirt! It would seem that Loki has stolen yer wind."
*Frame 5*
Perspective is no in line with the Viking as he rubs his chin with a smart alec smile in his face.
Viking: "Yeeesss. That would be quite a problem...."
*Frame 6*
View is the same now as in frame 3. A "SHHHUNK!" sound effect is seen as the longboat has now sprouted its oars sideways.
Viking: "....for a NOOB!"
*Frame 7 *
The longboat is now rowing away.
Sid: "Grrrr, I'm not a noob! Bring about the cannons!!"
Pirate 1: "We can't. There's no wind."
Sid: "Dang it!"
Pirate 2: (towards longboat) Are you guys hiring?
"On we sweep, with threshing oar......" is seen above the longboat.
*Frame 8*
Sid is seen talking in his sleep on a couch. Liz and Maxine are standing behind it.
Sid: (mumbling) "....urgh...not noob....dumb viking....."
Liz: "Waaat?"
Maxine: "It's this way whenever he has mead. He sees vikings in his dreams."
*Frame 1*
Sid and another pirate are leaning on the railing of their ship looking distressed.
Pirate 1: "Captain, we've stuck in these Doldrums for half a fortnight now! Should this continue much longer the crews humor will be ill indeed."
Sid: "Well what do you want me to do about it? Flap my arms and fill the sails with the breeze?"
A faint and small "Dun da da dun dun da..." is seen in the background.
Pirate 2: (off frame) "What is that sound?"
*Frame 2*
The "Dun da da dun dun da dun da da dun dun..." is seen larger and more clearly in the background now.
Pirate 1: "I'm not saying..... What is that sound?"
Sid: "What? Oh no. No no NO NO....."
Pirate 3: (also off screen but from the other side of the frame from Pirate 2) "It sounds like the Zeppelin of Led."
(*hint hint* <- clicky)
*Frame 3*
Sid is just barely seen but his voice is huge as he is starting at the bow of his ship looking down at a Viking longboat in front of his ship.
Sid: "NOOOOOOO!!"
*Frame 4*
The perspective is now looking down into the longboat as the Viking from last post looks up at him.
Viking: "Avast, puffy shirt! It would seem that Loki has stolen yer wind."
*Frame 5*
Perspective is no in line with the Viking as he rubs his chin with a smart alec smile in his face.
Viking: "Yeeesss. That would be quite a problem...."
*Frame 6*
View is the same now as in frame 3. A "SHHHUNK!" sound effect is seen as the longboat has now sprouted its oars sideways.
Viking: "....for a NOOB!"
*Frame 7 *
The longboat is now rowing away.
Sid: "Grrrr, I'm not a noob! Bring about the cannons!!"
Pirate 1: "We can't. There's no wind."
Sid: "Dang it!"
Pirate 2: (towards longboat) Are you guys hiring?
"On we sweep, with threshing oar......" is seen above the longboat.
*Frame 8*
Sid is seen talking in his sleep on a couch. Liz and Maxine are standing behind it.
Sid: (mumbling) "....urgh...not noob....dumb viking....."
Liz: "Waaat?"
Maxine: "It's this way whenever he has mead. He sees vikings in his dreams."
Theater of the Mind: Kickin it old school.
Posted 13 years ago*blows the dust of FA journal*
This one came to me a while back and I've just not had the time to type it out. It's a actually a 2 parter starring the character Sid from Lizard Beth's (not sure if she has an FA) comic Broken Plot Device. You see Sid imagines himself a pirate of sorts. Here we find him in a pirates world (unlike in Liz's comic) when something odd happens...
*Frame 1*
Sid is dressed 'piratey' and crossing swords with another man.
Sid: "You've put up quite a spirited defense Governor but now is the time for parlay."
Governor: "If you think you bested me then you're sorely mistake Senor Sid. For I just started to...."
*Frame 2*
All the sudden the Governor can no longer be seen and in the background is a giant bold word saying "AXED!". There is a trail of blood hanging in the air from where his head used to be sloping suddenly to the left a bit then down. The handle of the short-handled, single blade axe can be seen sticking up from below the frame. Sid is still in his sword fighting stance but looks horrified with his mouth agape.
*Frame 3*
Sid is still looking shocked as a fat, bearded and horn helmeted Viking walks past (going right to left), grabbing his axe as he goes without looking at Sid or his victim.
Sid: "Oh my God!"
*Frame 4*
The Viking now goes from left to right with his axe on his back, a bag of loot over his left shoulder and an unconscious woman in 1800's garb over his right. There is now smoke now billowing from the left hand of the frame.
Viking: "Rape and pillage aren't just turns of phrase......noob."
*Frame 5*
Sid is now looking angry and shouting at the Viking who is now off frame right.
Sid: "I'm not a noob!"
Viking: "Kids these days. Gonna give sea raiding a good name."
Theme continued in next post!
This one came to me a while back and I've just not had the time to type it out. It's a actually a 2 parter starring the character Sid from Lizard Beth's (not sure if she has an FA) comic Broken Plot Device. You see Sid imagines himself a pirate of sorts. Here we find him in a pirates world (unlike in Liz's comic) when something odd happens...
*Frame 1*
Sid is dressed 'piratey' and crossing swords with another man.
Sid: "You've put up quite a spirited defense Governor but now is the time for parlay."
Governor: "If you think you bested me then you're sorely mistake Senor Sid. For I just started to...."
*Frame 2*
All the sudden the Governor can no longer be seen and in the background is a giant bold word saying "AXED!". There is a trail of blood hanging in the air from where his head used to be sloping suddenly to the left a bit then down. The handle of the short-handled, single blade axe can be seen sticking up from below the frame. Sid is still in his sword fighting stance but looks horrified with his mouth agape.
*Frame 3*
Sid is still looking shocked as a fat, bearded and horn helmeted Viking walks past (going right to left), grabbing his axe as he goes without looking at Sid or his victim.
Sid: "Oh my God!"
*Frame 4*
The Viking now goes from left to right with his axe on his back, a bag of loot over his left shoulder and an unconscious woman in 1800's garb over his right. There is now smoke now billowing from the left hand of the frame.
Viking: "Rape and pillage aren't just turns of phrase......noob."
*Frame 5*
Sid is now looking angry and shouting at the Viking who is now off frame right.
Sid: "I'm not a noob!"
Viking: "Kids these days. Gonna give sea raiding a good name."
Theme continued in next post!
Theater of the Mind: Something's in the Air
Posted 14 years agoMany people love the arrival of Spring. I'm not one of them....
*Frame 1*
xianjaguar is dressed in a policeman's uniform and sitting at a desk marked "Spring Patrol". SF comes up to the desk. His eyes are red and irritated, his nose runny, his throat irritated and he's occasional hacking.
XJ: Can I help you?
SF: Yaa seezon rabed be in tha doze.
*Frame 2*
XJ: Excuse me?
SF: *shouting* ARR BOO DEVV?? YAA STUBBID SEEZON RABED BE IN THA BAM DOZE!!!
*Frame 3*
XJ: Sir, there's no reason to use that language....I think.
SF start hacking his guts out.
*Bonus frame*
SF and XJ are standing in the witness section of a lineup room. In the perps section are labeled: 1-a tree, 2-some grass, 3-some flowers and 4-some mold.
SF: Olive deb! Ib waz olive deb!
XJ: So you're *snerk* saying it was a gag rabe?
*Frame 1*
xianjaguar is dressed in a policeman's uniform and sitting at a desk marked "Spring Patrol". SF comes up to the desk. His eyes are red and irritated, his nose runny, his throat irritated and he's occasional hacking.XJ: Can I help you?
SF: Yaa seezon rabed be in tha doze.
*Frame 2*
XJ: Excuse me?
SF: *shouting* ARR BOO DEVV?? YAA STUBBID SEEZON RABED BE IN THA BAM DOZE!!!
*Frame 3*
XJ: Sir, there's no reason to use that language....I think.
SF start hacking his guts out.
*Bonus frame*
SF and XJ are standing in the witness section of a lineup room. In the perps section are labeled: 1-a tree, 2-some grass, 3-some flowers and 4-some mold.
SF: Olive deb! Ib waz olive deb!
XJ: So you're *snerk* saying it was a gag rabe?
Meme Time: Jonas's FA Tropes.
Posted 14 years agoSF can't draw yet he finds various memes interesting. So I'll just have to complete this one by jonas by drawing with words.
Original Meme: http://www.furaffinity.net/full/5611148/
Blank Form: http://www.furaffinity.net/view/5611145/
*Left Frame*
Trope Name: Madden Into Misanthropy
SF is standing in a fast food lobby wearing a business shirt with pocket protector and tie while holding a sub-machine gun up in one hand as 2 terrified fast food workers have their hands up.
SF: "Rick could you get it for me please? I feel more comfortable now calling you Rick after...all we've been through together."
(Scene stolen from one of the greatest movies ever made. )
*Right Frame*
Trope Name: Vision Quest
SF is dirty, his clothes are severely worn and he's wearing a hikers backpack. He has a tired, irritated expression as he's being addressed by another guy.
OG: "Dude, you've been gone almost a month and a half. Did you speak with the spirit of your ancestors?"
SF: "Yes, yes I did."
OG: "What did it say?"
SF: "Get me another beer Billy and stop blockin the TV, I'm trying to watch the game."
jonas by drawing with words.Original Meme: http://www.furaffinity.net/full/5611148/
Blank Form: http://www.furaffinity.net/view/5611145/
*Left Frame*
Trope Name: Madden Into Misanthropy
SF is standing in a fast food lobby wearing a business shirt with pocket protector and tie while holding a sub-machine gun up in one hand as 2 terrified fast food workers have their hands up.
SF: "Rick could you get it for me please? I feel more comfortable now calling you Rick after...all we've been through together."
(Scene stolen from one of the greatest movies ever made. )
*Right Frame*
Trope Name: Vision Quest
SF is dirty, his clothes are severely worn and he's wearing a hikers backpack. He has a tired, irritated expression as he's being addressed by another guy.
OG: "Dude, you've been gone almost a month and a half. Did you speak with the spirit of your ancestors?"
SF: "Yes, yes I did."
OG: "What did it say?"
SF: "Get me another beer Billy and stop blockin the TV, I'm trying to watch the game."
Theater of the Mind: Equestria now controls Madrid.
Posted 14 years agoThis came to me today at work. It seems the forces of ponydom can not be stopped.
The setting is a black and white world ala old footage from the 30s.
*Frame 1*
A reporter is seen talking to Fluttershy who is wearing an old style green army helmet. Other ponies are seen walking in the background. She and they are all in color.
Reporter: You have 4 columns advancing on the city but it is heavily defended. Do you think your forces will be enough?
Fluttershy: Teehee! We have a fifth column inside the city.
*Frame 2*
Scene switches to SF watching a newsreel of the reporters interview being displayed on a wall. He is wearing a military officers uniform and sitting in an office with maps and other strategic planning tools laying arouind. He has a dismissive expression on his face.
SF: Bah! What nonsense. There are no ponies inside the city.....unless.....
*Frame 3*
He now has a look of realization and horror.
SF: .....NO!
*Frame 4*
SF runs to a window and throws it open the shutters. He looks out into a street where 1 of a large double set of doors in a wall has been opened by
Calbeck. 
flinters is seen pushing the other open. The street is filled with ponies that have come in through the doors.
*Frame 5*
SF: (quietly in shock) What have you done? (shouting) What have you done?!?
*Frame 6*
Roy is seen as from above with his back turned.
Roy: Friendship.....
He turns around and it is seen that his front is in color and his eyes are wide open with dialated pupils.
Roy: .....is magic.
*Frame 7*
SF is seen from in the office looking out the window. He begins to talk while looking out but turns suddenly to rush back to his desk.
SF: Noooo. I must warn the...
*Frame 8*
SF: ...HURRRRKKK!
As soon as SF turned around and tried to move he got gored in the midsection by Twilight Sparkle's horn.
*Frame 9*
SF falls backwards into a chair clutching his midsection.
foxyfennec is seen fully in color and standing next to Twilight Sparkle with a wide eyed, hypnotized look on her face.
Foxyfennec: It will all be pastel soon.
*Frame 10*
SF looks down at his midsection with a look of anger and pain on his face. As he pulls his hands back instead of blood his gut is covered in a spreading color scheme. His finger that were on the 'wound' seem to be changing into little hooves.
*Frame 11*
SF's right hand is seen removing his pistol from a holster on his side.
SF: Never.....
SF is now seen growling and holding the pistol to his head.
SF: .....A BRONY!!!!
*Frame 12*
A large "BLAMMM!" sound effect is seen with Twilight Sparkle and Foxyfennec looking to where SF is off frame.
Frame 13*
Same view except that TS has turned around and is starting to exit the room.
TS: Come. We have 'friends' to make.
The setting is a black and white world ala old footage from the 30s.
*Frame 1*
A reporter is seen talking to Fluttershy who is wearing an old style green army helmet. Other ponies are seen walking in the background. She and they are all in color.
Reporter: You have 4 columns advancing on the city but it is heavily defended. Do you think your forces will be enough?
Fluttershy: Teehee! We have a fifth column inside the city.
*Frame 2*
Scene switches to SF watching a newsreel of the reporters interview being displayed on a wall. He is wearing a military officers uniform and sitting in an office with maps and other strategic planning tools laying arouind. He has a dismissive expression on his face.
SF: Bah! What nonsense. There are no ponies inside the city.....unless.....
*Frame 3*
He now has a look of realization and horror.
SF: .....NO!
*Frame 4*
SF runs to a window and throws it open the shutters. He looks out into a street where 1 of a large double set of doors in a wall has been opened by
Calbeck. 
flinters is seen pushing the other open. The street is filled with ponies that have come in through the doors.*Frame 5*
SF: (quietly in shock) What have you done? (shouting) What have you done?!?
*Frame 6*
Roy is seen as from above with his back turned.
Roy: Friendship.....
He turns around and it is seen that his front is in color and his eyes are wide open with dialated pupils.
Roy: .....is magic.
*Frame 7*
SF is seen from in the office looking out the window. He begins to talk while looking out but turns suddenly to rush back to his desk.
SF: Noooo. I must warn the...
*Frame 8*
SF: ...HURRRRKKK!
As soon as SF turned around and tried to move he got gored in the midsection by Twilight Sparkle's horn.
*Frame 9*
SF falls backwards into a chair clutching his midsection.
foxyfennec is seen fully in color and standing next to Twilight Sparkle with a wide eyed, hypnotized look on her face.Foxyfennec: It will all be pastel soon.
*Frame 10*
SF looks down at his midsection with a look of anger and pain on his face. As he pulls his hands back instead of blood his gut is covered in a spreading color scheme. His finger that were on the 'wound' seem to be changing into little hooves.
*Frame 11*
SF's right hand is seen removing his pistol from a holster on his side.
SF: Never.....
SF is now seen growling and holding the pistol to his head.
SF: .....A BRONY!!!!
*Frame 12*
A large "BLAMMM!" sound effect is seen with Twilight Sparkle and Foxyfennec looking to where SF is off frame.
Frame 13*
Same view except that TS has turned around and is starting to exit the room.
TS: Come. We have 'friends' to make.
Theater of the Mind: He won't feel a thing.
Posted 14 years agoWhile in a discussion recently I made an unfortunately too common grammatical error. But instead of realizing that and trying to avoid it in the future, what if it became a selling point?
*Panel 1*
*SF is dressed up like an old carnival barker complete with stripped jacket, straw hat and cane. He's standing next to a sandwich board that can barely be seen.*
SF: Well my good folks have you ever found yourself in a tongue twister? Want to say something but just can't grasp the proper verbiage? Well suffer no longer! I've got a genuine, patented system guaranteed to get you out of any multiplication problem you find your mouth in!
*Panel 2*
*SF is pointing to the now visible sandwich board with his cane.*
SF: It's Dr. Fox's 'Invent-A-Suffix' system! Now you can instantly pluralize any word! Using the 'Invent-A-Suffix' system you just slap an "es" at the end and whammo! It's pural! Easy as pie folks, now who'll be the first to purchase this wonder of modern grammar??
*Panel 3*
*
genesisw and her husband Uriel are seen dressed like characters out of "The Grapes of Wrath". Uriel is loading shells into an open double barrel shotgun.*
Gen: Aww Pa, do ya gotta put him down?
Uriel: It's for his own good Ma.
*Panel 1*
*SF is dressed up like an old carnival barker complete with stripped jacket, straw hat and cane. He's standing next to a sandwich board that can barely be seen.*
SF: Well my good folks have you ever found yourself in a tongue twister? Want to say something but just can't grasp the proper verbiage? Well suffer no longer! I've got a genuine, patented system guaranteed to get you out of any multiplication problem you find your mouth in!
*Panel 2*
*SF is pointing to the now visible sandwich board with his cane.*
SF: It's Dr. Fox's 'Invent-A-Suffix' system! Now you can instantly pluralize any word! Using the 'Invent-A-Suffix' system you just slap an "es" at the end and whammo! It's pural! Easy as pie folks, now who'll be the first to purchase this wonder of modern grammar??
*Panel 3*
*
genesisw and her husband Uriel are seen dressed like characters out of "The Grapes of Wrath". Uriel is loading shells into an open double barrel shotgun.*Gen: Aww Pa, do ya gotta put him down?
Uriel: It's for his own good Ma.
Theater of the Mind: A world without...
Posted 15 years agoThese are 2 short comics laid out in a 3 panel vertical format. They can be furry or non-furry.
Comic 1:
Title: (in small letters) And now, picture...
(next line, a large font that gets larger and wider as it gets closer to the bottom) A world without cheese.....
*frame 1*
Strewn everywhere are bodies, all with self inflicted gunshot wounds to the head. A small group of survivors are seen next to some buildings. Their leader speaks:
Leader: "Such is the fate of a world built on suffering. But now we, the vegans, will build a new world! A world free from cruelty. A world where all species..."
*frame 2*
A man bursts out a door of one of the buildings. Everyone is looking at him.
Man: *panicked* "They weren't lying! There really is no cheese!!"
*frame 3*
All the vegans now all lay dead of suicide as well.
Comic 2
(This comic is only 2 frames.)
Title: (in small letters) And now, picture...
(next line, the larger font) A world without bacon.....
*frame 1*
(It's blank.)
*frame 2*
The artist is looking at the audience with a look of anger and disgust.
Artist: I refuse to draw such an abomination.
Comic 1:
Title: (in small letters) And now, picture...
(next line, a large font that gets larger and wider as it gets closer to the bottom) A world without cheese.....
*frame 1*
Strewn everywhere are bodies, all with self inflicted gunshot wounds to the head. A small group of survivors are seen next to some buildings. Their leader speaks:
Leader: "Such is the fate of a world built on suffering. But now we, the vegans, will build a new world! A world free from cruelty. A world where all species..."
*frame 2*
A man bursts out a door of one of the buildings. Everyone is looking at him.
Man: *panicked* "They weren't lying! There really is no cheese!!"
*frame 3*
All the vegans now all lay dead of suicide as well.
Comic 2
(This comic is only 2 frames.)
Title: (in small letters) And now, picture...
(next line, the larger font) A world without bacon.....
*frame 1*
(It's blank.)
*frame 2*
The artist is looking at the audience with a look of anger and disgust.
Artist: I refuse to draw such an abomination.
Theater of the Mind: Pretty Princess
Posted 15 years agoIt would seem that the grocery store is my muse because for some unbeknownst reason I thought up the following while there. It stars a pained 
rabbi-tom who unknowing becomes a kind of muse himself.
*Panel 1*
A female reporter is sitting across from a older, bitter-faced woman in a pantsuit sitting at a business desk.
Reporter: You've risen from humble beginnings to head 2 very successful companies even though they both deal with such a controversial subject matter. But what was it that inspired you to go into these industries?
Woman: It all started on my 9th birthday....
*Panel 2*
A very hung over horse is out checking his mail in the morning. On the way back to the door he takes a knee and holds his head in his heads.
RT: Ohh god. Why did I drink so much last night??
*Panel 3*
Suddenly a little girl is standing right behind him pointing at him and yelling as RT grimaces in pain from the volume of her voice.
Little Girl: MOMMY LOOK!! A PONY!!
*Panel 4*
The little girl has climbed onto his back and his holding herself up by his mane while continuing to shout.
LG: GIMMIE A RIDE PONY! I'M A PRETTY PRINCESS RIDING A PONY!!! LOOK MOMMY I'M...
RT: Get the *@#% off of me you little *#$@!^$#!!!
*Panel 5*
*panel goes the full page length from left to right* A close up of the gaping mouthed horrified little girl's face is seen.
*Panel 6*
The reporter is sitting back looking shocked as the woman says:
Woman: And that's when I knew what my life's work would be.
Behind the woman on the wall are seen 2 posters for "Pretty Princess Glue" and "Pretty Princess brand Dog Food".
rabbi-tom who unknowing becomes a kind of muse himself.*Panel 1*
A female reporter is sitting across from a older, bitter-faced woman in a pantsuit sitting at a business desk.
Reporter: You've risen from humble beginnings to head 2 very successful companies even though they both deal with such a controversial subject matter. But what was it that inspired you to go into these industries?
Woman: It all started on my 9th birthday....
*Panel 2*
A very hung over horse is out checking his mail in the morning. On the way back to the door he takes a knee and holds his head in his heads.
RT: Ohh god. Why did I drink so much last night??
*Panel 3*
Suddenly a little girl is standing right behind him pointing at him and yelling as RT grimaces in pain from the volume of her voice.
Little Girl: MOMMY LOOK!! A PONY!!
*Panel 4*
The little girl has climbed onto his back and his holding herself up by his mane while continuing to shout.
LG: GIMMIE A RIDE PONY! I'M A PRETTY PRINCESS RIDING A PONY!!! LOOK MOMMY I'M...
RT: Get the *@#% off of me you little *#$@!^$#!!!
*Panel 5*
*panel goes the full page length from left to right* A close up of the gaping mouthed horrified little girl's face is seen.
*Panel 6*
The reporter is sitting back looking shocked as the woman says:
Woman: And that's when I knew what my life's work would be.
Behind the woman on the wall are seen 2 posters for "Pretty Princess Glue" and "Pretty Princess brand Dog Food".
Theater of the Mind: High Frequency
Posted 15 years agoThis is comic about differing perspectives is laid out in a 4 panel windowpane view. It could be equally at home in color or black and white. It stars 
hollyann, xianjaguar and myself.
*Frame 1*
Xian is seen looking out a window with her elbows on the sill and head held in her fists in a pouting position with face in a POed expression.
In a thought bubble:
XJ: gumble...grump... Stupid cold. Stupid mountains. Stupid west.
*Frame 2*
A single snowflake falls from above as she now speaks out loud.
XJ: Oh great, now it's going to snow.
From outside frame right.
Voices: SNOW!?!
*Frame 3*
*XJ is pushed to the side as SF and HA have their hands and open mouthed derp faces pressed to the window looking at what are now 3 snowflakes.
SF and HA: *Gaaaasp!*
*Frame 4*
Now facing each other with balled fist held up in faced filled with glee:
HA and SF: EEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!!!!!!!
XJ is off to the side, head tilled, hair frazzled, teeth exposed, 1 eye clenched shut and claws on twisted hands exposed from pain.
hollyann, xianjaguar and myself.*Frame 1*
Xian is seen looking out a window with her elbows on the sill and head held in her fists in a pouting position with face in a POed expression.
In a thought bubble:
XJ: gumble...grump... Stupid cold. Stupid mountains. Stupid west.
*Frame 2*
A single snowflake falls from above as she now speaks out loud.
XJ: Oh great, now it's going to snow.
From outside frame right.
Voices: SNOW!?!
*Frame 3*
*XJ is pushed to the side as SF and HA have their hands and open mouthed derp faces pressed to the window looking at what are now 3 snowflakes.
SF and HA: *Gaaaasp!*
*Frame 4*
Now facing each other with balled fist held up in faced filled with glee:
HA and SF: EEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!!!!!!!
XJ is off to the side, head tilled, hair frazzled, teeth exposed, 1 eye clenched shut and claws on twisted hands exposed from pain.
Theater of the Mind: Colorful
Posted 15 years agoThis is something inspired by my recent trip to Rainfurrest. It's already common knowledge that a particular demographic is disproportionally represented in furry but this last weekend that fact was on full display. This is laid out in the traditional 3 panel style. It is based on an actual event that occurred there.
*Panel 1*
SF is seen looking at and speaking to the viewer in a newscaster style framing.
SF: Well this con already appears to be much better run than previous fur cons I've attended. In a few hours they'll be....
*Panel 2*
The camera refocuses on a blue and orange (the official colors of RF fur-suiting it would seem) husky wearing leather prancing merrily through from right to left. Rainbows streak from its fingers, tail and hair.
Husky: Oh so pretty! I feel pretty and witty and gaaaaay!
*Panel 3*
The husky has passed and the rainbows fade in the direction of travel. SF looks that way with a confused look on his face.
SF: .....the fuck?!?
*Panel 1*
SF is seen looking at and speaking to the viewer in a newscaster style framing.
SF: Well this con already appears to be much better run than previous fur cons I've attended. In a few hours they'll be....
*Panel 2*
The camera refocuses on a blue and orange (the official colors of RF fur-suiting it would seem) husky wearing leather prancing merrily through from right to left. Rainbows streak from its fingers, tail and hair.
Husky: Oh so pretty! I feel pretty and witty and gaaaaay!
*Panel 3*
The husky has passed and the rainbows fade in the direction of travel. SF looks that way with a confused look on his face.
SF: .....the fuck?!?
Theater of the Mind: Molestfreshment
Posted 15 years agoHere's the latest creation to come to my mind. For some reason it was in 
furseiseki's style so it stars his character Taski. I don't know why but this came to me while shopping for dinner after work. I guess Albertsons is my muse. This is in the vertical style of Taski's multi-panel comics.
*Frame 1*
Taski is outside and the sun can be seen in the distance. He's hot and wiping his forehead while facing to the left.
*Frame 2*
Suddenly from the right a corporate spokesman in the Spumco style pops into frame startling Taski.
Announcer: Hey there young person! It's pretty hot out today isn't it.
Taski: *gack!*
*Frame 3*
Taski is now looking at the spokesman.
SM: I bet you could go for some cool refreshment right about now.
Taksi: *shakes his head in agreement*
*Frame 4*
Spokesman is now reaching behind his back.
SM: Then have I got something for you! It's one of America's favorite soft drinks.
*Taski is smiling broadly and his eyes are wide with anticipation.
*Frame 5*
Spokesman still has his hand behind his back and is leaning slightly towards Taski.
SM: It's green. It's carbonated. It's as refreshing as a mountain stream...
*Taski is now bouncing up and down with excitement.*
*Frame 6*
Perspective has changed to Taski's/Is looking up at the spokesman.
Young man have a.....
*Frame 7*
Perspective is back to a side view of spokesman and Taski.
SM:....Caffeine Free Diet Mountain Dew! *holds forth a 20oz bottle*
*Taski face is now a horrified/angry jawdrop.*
*Frame 8*
Taski is gone and a bunch of police are standing around/photographing the face down body of the spokesman. He is mostly covered by a sheet though a particularly shaped bulge toward the back indicates that the pop bottle has been shoved 1/2 way up the spokesman's rear.
furseiseki's style so it stars his character Taski. I don't know why but this came to me while shopping for dinner after work. I guess Albertsons is my muse. This is in the vertical style of Taski's multi-panel comics.*Frame 1*
Taski is outside and the sun can be seen in the distance. He's hot and wiping his forehead while facing to the left.
*Frame 2*
Suddenly from the right a corporate spokesman in the Spumco style pops into frame startling Taski.
Announcer: Hey there young person! It's pretty hot out today isn't it.
Taski: *gack!*
*Frame 3*
Taski is now looking at the spokesman.
SM: I bet you could go for some cool refreshment right about now.
Taksi: *shakes his head in agreement*
*Frame 4*
Spokesman is now reaching behind his back.
SM: Then have I got something for you! It's one of America's favorite soft drinks.
*Taski is smiling broadly and his eyes are wide with anticipation.
*Frame 5*
Spokesman still has his hand behind his back and is leaning slightly towards Taski.
SM: It's green. It's carbonated. It's as refreshing as a mountain stream...
*Taski is now bouncing up and down with excitement.*
*Frame 6*
Perspective has changed to Taski's/Is looking up at the spokesman.
Young man have a.....
*Frame 7*
Perspective is back to a side view of spokesman and Taski.
SM:....Caffeine Free Diet Mountain Dew! *holds forth a 20oz bottle*
*Taski face is now a horrified/angry jawdrop.*
*Frame 8*
Taski is gone and a bunch of police are standing around/photographing the face down body of the spokesman. He is mostly covered by a sheet though a particularly shaped bulge toward the back indicates that the pop bottle has been shoved 1/2 way up the spokesman's rear.
Theater of the Mind: You Bastard!
Posted 15 years agoToday we have what could either be a comic or a short flash animation starring stokerbramwell
Stoker awakes in a haze with spots in front of his eyes.
Stoker: Ugggghhh....what happened...
He looks down to see a pair of pants on him that come up to the middle of his waist.
Stoker: *now fully awake* Oh haha guys you know I'm just going to take them....what the...
No zipper, buttons or other means of loosening them can be seen.
Stoker: What....how do.....where's the.... *notices a shape in the shadows near him* *now in a panicky voice* How do I take these off?!?
*SF steps forward barely out of the shadows. He's wearing a dark hooded robe with the hood up*
SF: *grinning menacingly* Oh I'm afraid that...hehe...they don't...hehehe...come off....hehehehehehe!
Stoker staggers backward...
Stoker: No. No!
*Stoker is seen in full Darth Vader pose with SF laughing in the background.*
Stoker: NNNOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!
stokerbramwellStoker awakes in a haze with spots in front of his eyes.
Stoker: Ugggghhh....what happened...
He looks down to see a pair of pants on him that come up to the middle of his waist.
Stoker: *now fully awake* Oh haha guys you know I'm just going to take them....what the...
No zipper, buttons or other means of loosening them can be seen.
Stoker: What....how do.....where's the.... *notices a shape in the shadows near him* *now in a panicky voice* How do I take these off?!?
*SF steps forward barely out of the shadows. He's wearing a dark hooded robe with the hood up*
SF: *grinning menacingly* Oh I'm afraid that...hehe...they don't...hehehe...come off....hehehehehehe!
Stoker staggers backward...
Stoker: No. No!
*Stoker is seen in full Darth Vader pose with SF laughing in the background.*
Stoker: NNNOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!
Theater of the Mind: True Natures
Posted 15 years agoThis was something that for some reason came to me while shopping for dinner after work. It stars hollyann and 
kalikafutago
A house in the woods is seen. The narration is via text.
"Hollyann and Kalika's husbands are gone. No friends are around and the neighbors live far away."
The view zooms into a window where Hollyann and Kalika are looking at the camera grinning deviously.
"The time has come. They can finally cut loose. Let their inhibitions down...and just go completely..."
They look at each other still grinning.
"...CANADIAN!"
"Koo-loo-koo-koo Koo-koo-koo-koo" is heard while the scene suddenly changes to Hollyann and Kalika sitting on a couch surrounded by Canadacana with them looking like Bob and Doug MacKenzine.
K: How's it goin eh?
HA: Boy did you see that Herb Zerbrowski did?
K: Oh that guy needs to take off eh! I've seen more brains in a moose now.
HA: A yup. Hey pass me annuder Molson eh.
hollyann and 
kalikafutago A house in the woods is seen. The narration is via text.
"Hollyann and Kalika's husbands are gone. No friends are around and the neighbors live far away."
The view zooms into a window where Hollyann and Kalika are looking at the camera grinning deviously.
"The time has come. They can finally cut loose. Let their inhibitions down...and just go completely..."
They look at each other still grinning.
"...CANADIAN!"
"Koo-loo-koo-koo Koo-koo-koo-koo" is heard while the scene suddenly changes to Hollyann and Kalika sitting on a couch surrounded by Canadacana with them looking like Bob and Doug MacKenzine.
K: How's it goin eh?
HA: Boy did you see that Herb Zerbrowski did?
K: Oh that guy needs to take off eh! I've seen more brains in a moose now.
HA: A yup. Hey pass me annuder Molson eh.
Theater of the Mind: Ezra Twist
Posted 15 years agoIf you're someone who watches the Funday Pawpet Show then you know who the Seal of Disapproval is. If you don't, it's a character used by Yappy when he feels that the show is in danger of venturing outside of its PG rating. The seal speaks in a single word: "Ork!" The seal will sometimes take down the characters mics and monologue. A few weeks ago things got real wild and the seal actually cut the stream and rebooted the show.
For some reason the following popped into my mind at work today. It's a play off a scene from Oliver Twist only with Pawpet characters. The image is 1 page divided into 3 frames.
First frame is a large frame in which "Ezra Twist" is seen from behind looking up at a giant John Bull style character. The character is so large that only his legs, stomach and crossed arms can be seen with a small bit of his low-topper seen above. Ezra is holding up something which can't be seen from this perspective.
In a frame-in-frame in the lower left corner with a perspective looking down at Ezra it is seen that he's holding up the 'Web PG' censorship panda and is asking "Please Sir, may I have Web 14?"
The bottom of the page is 2 frames side by side. It's the head of the John Bull character but with the face of the Seal of Disapproval. In the left frame his face is slightly twisted in a mix of surprise and disgust with him saying "Ork?" In the right frame he is enraged with flames for pupils and sharp teeth shouting "ORRRRKK?!?"
For some reason the following popped into my mind at work today. It's a play off a scene from Oliver Twist only with Pawpet characters. The image is 1 page divided into 3 frames.
First frame is a large frame in which "Ezra Twist" is seen from behind looking up at a giant John Bull style character. The character is so large that only his legs, stomach and crossed arms can be seen with a small bit of his low-topper seen above. Ezra is holding up something which can't be seen from this perspective.
In a frame-in-frame in the lower left corner with a perspective looking down at Ezra it is seen that he's holding up the 'Web PG' censorship panda and is asking "Please Sir, may I have Web 14?"
The bottom of the page is 2 frames side by side. It's the head of the John Bull character but with the face of the Seal of Disapproval. In the left frame his face is slightly twisted in a mix of surprise and disgust with him saying "Ork?" In the right frame he is enraged with flames for pupils and sharp teeth shouting "ORRRRKK?!?"
Theater of the Mind: Snapshots
Posted 15 years agoThe Snapshots series is basically single image ideas or things that wouldn't work as comics. Not full comics but little ideas that come into my mind from time to time. These were inspired by songs I heard on the radio.
The first involves genesisw and her husband. I have to listen to country everyday at work or else I'd never listen to this music. During the chorus of "Cowboy Casanova" by Carrie Underwood the following lyrics are heard:
The image is set inside a country/western bar with the perspective set behind Genesis. She's wearing a white cowboy hat at looking at a corner. There stands a jukebox with Uriel leaning against it in the classic "leaning cowboy" pose with his hat obscuring his eyes.
The next stars
animecat and her husband 
akelavincent
This could be either a series of images or a music video set to "Paparazzi" by Lady GaGa. Instead of Akela being a famous star or anything it would just be him living his normal life while Anime is all stalkerific on him. The ending? That's up to the viewer.
The first involves
genesisw and her husband. I have to listen to country everyday at work or else I'd never listen to this music. During the chorus of "Cowboy Casanova" by Carrie Underwood the following lyrics are heard:He's a, a good time, cowboy Casanova
Leaning up against the record machine
He looks like a cool drink of water
But he's candy-coated misery
He's the devil in disguise, a snake with blue eyes
And he only comes out at nightThe image is set inside a country/western bar with the perspective set behind Genesis. She's wearing a white cowboy hat at looking at a corner. There stands a jukebox with Uriel leaning against it in the classic "leaning cowboy" pose with his hat obscuring his eyes.
The next stars
animecat and her husband 
akelavincentThis could be either a series of images or a music video set to "Paparazzi" by Lady GaGa. Instead of Akela being a famous star or anything it would just be him living his normal life while Anime is all stalkerific on him. The ending? That's up to the viewer.
Theater of the Mind: Biological Warfare
Posted 15 years agoThis is a 3 frame that's inspired in part by those old Tampax commercials. It concerns Mother Nature and her little red monthly gift. Any fem-fur could be the subject of this one.
This comic has 2 small upper frames and one large lower one.
Frame 1: A glittering trail is seen flying through the sky with the caption "What's this? Why it's Mother Nature."
Frame 2: Zooms in to see a green dressed fairy carrying a red basket. "And she's got her monthly gift!"
Frame 3:
Caption above main image: "This time...."
Caption below main image: "...the b***h doesn't get through!"
In the main image the fem-fur subject is seen only in her head peering out of a sandbagged bunker. She's wearing a camo-netted steel helmet and holding a double barrel shotgun. The bunker is surrounded by razor wire, landmines and even 2 chained guard dogs. Additional are a radar dish on top, dual autoguns, multi-launch missile box and a bear trap.
This comic has 2 small upper frames and one large lower one.
Frame 1: A glittering trail is seen flying through the sky with the caption "What's this? Why it's Mother Nature."
Frame 2: Zooms in to see a green dressed fairy carrying a red basket. "And she's got her monthly gift!"
Frame 3:
Caption above main image: "This time...."
Caption below main image: "...the b***h doesn't get through!"
In the main image the fem-fur subject is seen only in her head peering out of a sandbagged bunker. She's wearing a camo-netted steel helmet and holding a double barrel shotgun. The bunker is surrounded by razor wire, landmines and even 2 chained guard dogs. Additional are a radar dish on top, dual autoguns, multi-launch missile box and a bear trap.
Theater of the Mind: Reverse physics.
Posted 15 years agoThis idea came from a conversation I had with 
Spunky a while back.
Differences between my irl self and Spunky's irl self couldn't be more pronounced. I'm 5' 11" and 245lbs. Spunky would be stretching it at 4' 8" and maybe 100lbs soaking wet. Thing is for some reason basic laws of physics seem to be reversed for us.
When Spunky walks around she does so in a loud, noticeable manner. I for some reason have the inadvertent gift of silent transit. Thus the following comic.
The interior of an office is seen. Row after row of cubic work spaces spread into the distance. A glass entrance door is seen at the far wall. A woman is seated at her desk in the foreground typing.
*1/2 half of the comic - Frames are horizontal format going all the way across the page.*
*Frame 1*
In the distance a series of words barely readable due to size is seen. The words "Thud thud thud thud" increase in size as they go from left to right.
*Frame 2*
The words are now more visible and 1/2 way to the foreground but this time increase in size from right to left.
*Frame 3*
The words are again going left to right and are above the row immediately behind the foreground. The tops of a pair of wolf ears can barely be seen mid frame. The woman typing without looking away from her screen says "Hi Jen." A response of "Hi Staci!" is seen.
*Second 1/2*
*Frame 1*
The same women is typing at her workstation. An outline of SF can be seen by the doorway in the distance.
*Frame 2*
The situation is the same except that now SF is nowhere to be seen.
*Frame 3*
*SF is now standing right behind the woman.*
SF: "Excuse me..."
Woman: *startled* "Aaaahhhhh!"
Spunky a while back.Differences between my irl self and Spunky's irl self couldn't be more pronounced. I'm 5' 11" and 245lbs. Spunky would be stretching it at 4' 8" and maybe 100lbs soaking wet. Thing is for some reason basic laws of physics seem to be reversed for us.
When Spunky walks around she does so in a loud, noticeable manner. I for some reason have the inadvertent gift of silent transit. Thus the following comic.
The interior of an office is seen. Row after row of cubic work spaces spread into the distance. A glass entrance door is seen at the far wall. A woman is seated at her desk in the foreground typing.
*1/2 half of the comic - Frames are horizontal format going all the way across the page.*
*Frame 1*
In the distance a series of words barely readable due to size is seen. The words "Thud thud thud thud" increase in size as they go from left to right.
*Frame 2*
The words are now more visible and 1/2 way to the foreground but this time increase in size from right to left.
*Frame 3*
The words are again going left to right and are above the row immediately behind the foreground. The tops of a pair of wolf ears can barely be seen mid frame. The woman typing without looking away from her screen says "Hi Jen." A response of "Hi Staci!" is seen.
*Second 1/2*
*Frame 1*
The same women is typing at her workstation. An outline of SF can be seen by the doorway in the distance.
*Frame 2*
The situation is the same except that now SF is nowhere to be seen.
*Frame 3*
*SF is now standing right behind the woman.*
SF: "Excuse me..."
Woman: *startled* "Aaaahhhhh!"
Theater of the Mind: Fastest border collie in all Meh-he-co!
Posted 15 years agoThis is something I've had rolling around in my head for quite a while. It's 4 panel comic starring my character and 
sirod inspired by those Looney Tunes of old.
*Panel 1*
SF is asking a question of Sirod who is seen with a "Hu?" expression with her head tilted slightly to the side. Both characters can only be seen from the waist up.
SF: "So what is your heritage?"
*Panel 2*
Sirod is now seen smiling and wearing a big yellow sombrero with white shirt and red bandanna ala Speedy Gonzales.
SF: "Ohhhh, I see."
*Panel 3*
SF only is seen walking away in the opposite direction.
SF: "She's Mexi...."
*Panel 4*
*leaning into the panel* Sirod: "YEAH HA!!"
An inverted mushroom cloud is seen where SF was with a pair of shocked, claw extended feet at the top of the frame.
sirod inspired by those Looney Tunes of old.*Panel 1*
SF is asking a question of Sirod who is seen with a "Hu?" expression with her head tilted slightly to the side. Both characters can only be seen from the waist up.
SF: "So what is your heritage?"
*Panel 2*
Sirod is now seen smiling and wearing a big yellow sombrero with white shirt and red bandanna ala Speedy Gonzales.
SF: "Ohhhh, I see."
*Panel 3*
SF only is seen walking away in the opposite direction.
SF: "She's Mexi...."
*Panel 4*
*leaning into the panel* Sirod: "YEAH HA!!"
An inverted mushroom cloud is seen where SF was with a pair of shocked, claw extended feet at the top of the frame.
