Hey guys.

This have been a (bad words, not safe to hear) week.
Mainly because of 2 reasons.

1. Weee I got a job. NOT! I was waiting for the guy to call me, and tell me the time I should meet and come to sind the papers. But he didn't call.
So I went to the place to ask him, but he wasn't there. Then I got hold on the lower boss, or his right hand helper. I tolled him what I was up sad about, and the guy got angry at the boss. He called him to hear about it.
After he talked with him did he said he will get him to call me the next day, but it would be best if I came the next day so I could kick his ass myself.
*sigh* once again I went to the place and got the right guy. But he said the big boss still haven't giving green light to hire me, he went on vacation instead. I waited 3 weeks, and he still didn't look at the fucking papers. They are in need of people and I'm ready to work right away, but nooooo.....
But there is an other reason as well. There is a bitch already working there, she only works half time, and yet she is more in school then at work. And the people at the place isn't happy with her work as well.
So she founded out how to mess things for them, and that will effect my changes for getting the job there.
All sodden she desires to quite school, and that means the work place have to hire her for full time, and if they don't hire her, will they have to pay her a bill on 20,000 Dkr.
I will first hear from them Monday, after they had a meeting about it, and it was Monday I should have started there.
And not only that, the job center will stop paying me money that same Monday, because they where tolled that I would get a job from that date.
So if I don't get the job, will there be some days with no money at all.

Thank you, you (big bad word) bitch *throws a big rock after her*

2. My computer is more or less dead.
Yes, it started to shout down over this week, because there is some guy in this town where I live, try to steel my IP address, and that messed things up on my computer, plus it's getting old, but mostly because some people can't let other peoples things be.
So yeah, I have to get a new computer, witch will be soooo easy now with my new job with a good pay and.... oh wait, that's right, I can't, because of some bitch.

Right now am I using my mate's pc, but I have to look out, sinds the internet isn't the best as well here.
*sigh*

This is one fuck up week.

Well, see you guys... when I get a change to get online.

OMG OMG OMG OMG OMG OMG OMG OMG OMG OMG

Efter I was done with all my exams, with very good results, was it time to find out what to do with the education thing the job center had in mind for me.

I had a talk with the new school about the education and so, and they said I chould take it over 2 years insted of 3, because I already got the groundeducation from other educations I took in my early days.
So the plan was I should look for an "adult apprenticeship place" (ore something, don't know the name in english), so I looked around and had some meetings here and there.

Then I founded out that one of the bigste furniture stores (no not IKEA, but an other one) that is near the school, was looking for studens. I got in contakt with them, but then they already had 2 studens.
But they was in need of people with truck license (yes I got that) and they liked that I'm a female, Yay females rules
Naa... besided needing a truck driver, was they in need of a female touch with all the small things, like pillows, price cards, stickers, makes sure things looks nice and is in place.
So, sind they already had 2 studens and whould't take more in, did they come up with the idea of hire me for a permanent job untill the other studes are done, and keep a free place for me to become a studen by them till that time.

OMG!!! Thats the best deal ever.
It took some time to get there boss in on it, but it turned out just as it should.
So from 1th August will I start at my new job.
As Warehouse employee, YAY!!!! I got a job, come on everyone, dance with me.


And... yes... because of the job, will I be moving, as soon I found a place. Luckly the city I want to move to is the same place where my new job is, and where all my friends are, and where most of the things happens.
Weeeee I can't wait to get it all in place, to start a total new life more ore less.

About art... I sadly have to inform you... I got a very big art block.
Yes I still draw, but it's the colouring that I'm stuck with.
It's like I can't sit down and do those detailed colourings I use to do, it's like I only can get myself to do the basis colours and nothing more. No shades, no lighting, tones, nothing... and it's been like this now for months. I think some of you have notes that those days.

Insted am I now trying to do some real painting, both with acryl and watercolours. I'm starting very slow because I don't really know what to paint

Can only hope it all will fall in place when I get the new start.

Oooooooh boy.....
I'm already done with school??? Where the hell did the time go?

Now I'm just waiting for the days to come with the eksames... got eksames in "Danish", "Art", "English" and more "Danish"
I'm sure I do fine with my danish, I'm not the best in class, but I'm not nervos at all, so I'll do fine.

In art... well... not sure about that... so fare am I tolded I'm the best in class, but I have no idea what artist I should talk about and show and tell how the person maded his/hers art... that kind of historie did't get my interrest, I rader make it then read about it

And english... I'm soooooo pissed at my english teacher...
I took english to learn some more and to get better on the english I already can. But!... We hardly talk english at all. Let me give you an eksamble:
The teacher finds clips on youtube, let us watch it, and the we talk about the clip... in DANISH!!! How much english do you learn from that?!?!? GRRRRRRR!!!!! And the class in from 18 pm till 21:30 pm, so it's heavy to sit there on your big fat ass and learn nothing.
The last couple of days was I staying away... I learn more english by chatting with my friends over Msn and skype, then I do in class.
So I will enter the english eksame with the english I learned from home insted.

So wish me luck.

But thats not the only thing I need luck for.
Soon... The Dansih Pokemon TCG Championships 2010 is finding place.
The 29 - 30 May will be the day, and who ever wins will be going to Hawaii to play at the World Championships.

But I'm not thinking big thoughts about myself. I have't had a change to play alot this year, so I have no idea what people are playing with ore gotten eney new cards.
So I'll play for fun and hope the best

Hmmm..... what more...?

Ah yes.
Sinds I'm done with school soon and still is jobless, does it looks like the Job Center want me to take an education.
I'm fine with with the idea of taking an education, but then it looks like I have to move out of my apartment and into a collage, because of the money.
And thats where the problem is... sinds I got pets.
2 cats, 3 turtles, 1 lobster, and 3 aquariums (4 with the tank with the turtles)
Luckly my older stepbrother have offer to take the big tank with fish till I got my own place again.
And I'm not giving up on my cats!!! The job center said I should sinds they are "holding" me back, but they are my kids and I'm throwing them away
There are some collages that allows pets, but it will be hard to get in, because there rules say that I have to apply 12 months before to get a place by them

This is me right now

Oh well... besided those things am I doing fine... except that I now also have an artblock
I think this year is't my year.

The only good think I got to comfort me with is that I got my friends and boyfriend on my side.
Thanks to you guys am I'm not near as depressed ore sad over those things.
It's been a while sinds I was depressed... I hardly remember when I last was.
Thanks guys for keeping me up, and being there for me, I been needing that for a looooong time

Should I make a webcomic?

I had the idea of making one for like 3 years now, and now I got the change.
A webcomic with Ashley and her friends, and maybe your charater aswell, sepaints on the story.
But really, I had the idea for 3 years and have't really worked on it, only getting ideas for it, I'm still jobless right now so I chould work on it, but if I get a job again whould that keep me away from working on the comic ore what?

What do you think, and whould a comic with Ashley & CO be interresting?
Please tell me.

Yeah, I'm doing better now, not sad eney more ore worryed, my grandfather's funeral was today and it whent well, it was nothing big, efter his will was there no song ore priest ore eney other fanzy stuff, family and friends came to say goodbye to him, we where all standing there in the room with the coffin where my grandfather was in drinking beer ore soda and had a nice talk and cheers him on the trip.
That was how he wanted it.

So, now thats over all what is left is now for me to get a job efter I lost my old job, oh well, one step at the time.

Today the 9/30 was maybe not my best day...

Frist, it was my last day at the Kindergarden/Efter-day-care-canter as Educator assistant, so from tomorrow am I jobless, and I don't really have eney ideas what to do, so fare can I only go to the job center and talk with them, and maybe see if there was a way for me to get back in school so I can get something ouf of my life, oh well.

Second, efter I got home from work around 21:30pm, about 45 minutes efter did my mom call me... My grandfather just died.
So, mom, stepdad, me, grandmother and my uncle meet up to say goodbye/good night to him.
I chould't recognize my own grandfather at all when I sow him... he have changed so much over the 2 weeks... it was really sad and scary to see, and it really hurt when I sow my grandmother pet him on his cheek before we left, I chould't stop crying, it's now 2:40am and just by telling about it and remember how I sow her with him like that makes me cry again.
Well, we all knew it was his time, so it did't really come as a big chok, but still, it's never fun to lose a close family member.

Thats all for now.

Hey every one, I'm back from EF and it was a great trip!!!
I really enjoyed it and had fun and meet old and new friends.
I so can't wait till next year..... I want to meet people again.

Yep, the time has come, again I'm off to EF http://www.eurofurence.org/EF15/
And will frist be back monday 31/8, I have been and still is a bit stressed over it, and really anoyed, because I'm going to have a pannel in the art show, but the last couple of days (weeks)have I been in artblock, ore mostly colorblock, so all the draws I wante to put in the art show did't get done.... *hits myself*
Oh well, then I have to use the back up plan, witch I'm not that happy with.... normal pencel draws of animals.

So, I will be driving tuesday morning with 3 of my friends, 730 km on the highway... thats about 8-9 hours.
And it's only like 2½ week ago I started to talk with  zooboy18 and tolded him about EF, and he wante to join us, and he now does, 1 week efter did he pay a ticket from another that chould't make it efterall, how luckly can you be?
Me and my friends already meet  zooboy18 sinds I founded out he is in Denmark on a school (where I wish I chould go) so we had a meeting to get to know each other before the trip and to talk about how to travle.

I think it's what I have for now because I'm getting stressed again, I still have things to do before leaving tomorrow.
So, take care and see you all at EF ore next week when I'm back, bye.

Hey People.

I won't be online the next 2-3 days, I'm off to POKÉMON NATIONAL CHAMPIONSHIPS in Denmark.
Wish me luck, because if I win, then I'm off to USA >w<
So see you all later and take care.

What the fuck is worng with my neighbors?!?!

Here I am minding my own bussings and living my life and doing my job and taking care of my pets, I have done nothing to my neighbors ore said eney thing to them sinds they all seem nice, BUT!
Last monday efter work when I got home from work was I taking my cats out for an evening walk, they are indoor cats, so they only get out when I'm with them.
On the little walk in the garden we are sharring did I meet one of the ladys that also lives here, she like my cats and I never had a problem with her, she is the one I talk most to, but all sudden did she say to me that if I don't remove the tiny bell from the cats collar soon then will she call the animal cops on me for animalcruelty.

I was thinking WTF?!
That is one thing you can't accuse me for, and I won't be accuse for it!
I love my cats, every single of my pets, from cats, turtles, fish, snails and shrimps, I love them all and they are comming in frist place over eney thing.

She thinks the tiny bells on the collar is making the cats deaf ore giving them ear pain and say it's cruelty.
Sinds I got both cats did they have a little bell in the collar, you hardly hear them at all, you mostly hear them if they are fighting.
Even now when I look at the cats, they does't seem to bother about the bell ore the collar at all, they are not even trying to get them off by them self.

Then some days efter when the cats where out in their leash while I was cleaning chould I hear the same lady was outside talking to some of the other neighbors about my cats, they was talking about I should try having a collar on myself with a bell on to see how it is
Just one thing....... I already wear a collar with a bell on, they just have't notes yet XD

But really... whould you call it animalcruelty if a cat got a little bell on the collar, but the cat does't seem to care about it?
What do you think?


EDIT!!!
And now I'm even more pissed!
I just got home and whent out with the trash, then I see 2 girls at the age of 12 years, running and throwing stones efter the wild cats we have here, I got so piss at the girls and took them in act and asked them what they whould think if I started to throw stones efter them?! the girl that was staying listning to me did't know what to say and just left her shoulders, I sow one of the girls ran into the building on the other side where I was so I know there live there, I said that I had 2 cats myself and if I ever founded out that they was one of the cats they was throwing stones efter whould I go the there parents, sinds I now know where they live.
So fare did the standing girl "understand" what I was saying and said sorry and whould't do it again.

THAT IS ANIMALCRUELTY IF YOU ASK ME!!!! FUCKING KIDS!!!

Time for a new journal.... but not a good one.
Why not a good one? Let me tell you why...
When people ask me how I'm doing and all that, am I always saying it's going well and so, but it's a lie.

Those people that knows me, always say they see me as that happy smiling girl I am... well, sorry... I'm not that happy girl you think I am, you see.... I'm dealing with depressions and have for years, but I had it coveret behind a mask, my familiy frist founded out about it last year where I had a really big break down infront of my onkel and ant, they kinder started it, I was so upset that I was unable to drive ore walk, next day did my mom and stepdad hear about it, I tryed to go to work but the break down came back faster then lightning, and I was off to see the doctor.
He gave me pills and sendt me off to a psykolog ore something.
Even when I took the pills and whent to the psykolog, did nothing help, I did't feel like it had eney effekt ore maded me "happy"... I keept trying the the psykolog but stoped with the pills, soon efter did I also stop seeing the psykolog.

It when fine, I was't having eney attacks that had big harm on me, untill I was at my onkel and ant again, they asked in on me and how I was doing, just by that did they hit the big break down bottom again, and they got mad at me because I got sad and they had to use a whould night talking with me, AGAIN! But they did't really talk with me, they more talked down on me making me feeling more worthless, stubit, moron, shit, a nothing.
My onkel keept yelling at me I had't tryed life and got nowhere and had no friends, I did't live life (for him living life is drinking, party, beeing bullys on bikes, sex here and there) you call that a life?! what if I don't want that kind of life? I'm maybe not always happy with my life as it is now, but I do the things I like...
Of course did I not say that to him, because I have always been afried of my onkel, but I did let him know that I was scared of him when he just said: you have nothing to be scared off, thats bullshit! He does't know how I feel.
When they finaly let me go so I chould get home was I still effekted by it that I chould't drive, I had to stop in the midlet of the highway in the midlet of the night to screem and beat up my own car... I lost control over my anger.
When I finaly got home (6am) chould't I walk, I was hanging over my car like ½ hour before crowling in and fallt on the floor in my apartment and stayed there for I don't know how long before I had energy to go to bed, where I the next morning called my mom and said I did't fell well, and right away did she know it was my onkel. She got so angry that she forbiten me to go there again and should stay away, she even sendt them letters telling them a thing ore two telling them to stay away from me.
Sinds that have't I be there and been doing fine again... untill now...

Why am I telling all this? maybe it was time to get more of it off my heart and to let people know who I really am and what I'm dealing with, I did had an small depress attack ones where I let my anoyed/anger/sadness over a person here on FA, I frist notes the day efter what I had replyed to the person, I have talked to the person saying I'm very sorry and that I did't ment it, this person have already forgived me, but I will say sorry one more time. Sorry.

But thats not all, right now while making this journal am I really sad aswell.....
My grandfarther is at his line.... my mom is sure of he won't hold long, and I sow him today... and I got worryed and nervos, he looks words then a frist maded poop that got stept on, he hardly chould talk to me.
So it kinder messed up my mind, I guess it whould happen to every body efter seeing a family member you care for lieing there all helpless.

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I better try to get some new things up before I get more sad.
Well, the Eurofurence is taking cared of and hotel aswell, now I just have to make something for the art show.
And  Mercifur will be joining us this year, so we will get to meet, Weee....
I think thats all that is good for now, besinde my birthday here the 18th... where I turnd 25. omg. I'm getting old and I still has't a life (I guess my onkel whould say that)
Oh well, shut up onkel, I have been to out in the world (Hawaii and Florida/miami, and other countrys) have you?! hell no he has't.
Eney way, this is getting to long and trunding over in bad again, I better stop.
But now you know a bit about me, and I hope I did't scare you away.

The time has come, time too Eurofurence 15 Registration, also knows as EF.
What the hell is EF?
well Eurofurence is the biggest annual European furry convention, an international gathering of people who share an extraordinary appreciaton for anthropomorphic animal characters.
Read more if you when on the http://www.eurofurence.org/EF15/

And I have founded out that this year will I not be able to go too Pokémon World Championships in Orlando USA, as some maybe knows then I had to move too a new place and that costed the money that I had in mind for the trip, + job change ( pay change) Buuuu.....

Thats all for now ppl, so talk to you later.

Okay, I'm now trying to make my frist journal here and see what happens.

I have notes that many is on SL / Second Life, and Buttbagde asked me if I did't join too, okay I try it.

Yay I'm on SL, and what to do? I don't have eney... whats called? L$ money, so there is't much for me to go efter.

So..... I'll think I will say I draw your avatar (if your on SL yourself) for L$.
But only if you really want one, it's not like I'm drawing it and color it and post it here right away, so you just can take a copy ore something before I can get eneything.
I'm going to show a preview/stample so you can tell me if you think it's okay before I color it.

Well.... what do you think?