Yeppers, its just me... I haven't done a journal in so long so i thought i'd write one with some updates

even as i constantly try to fight it, my life online is dwindling.. so much work to do in the real world i rarely have time to talk to the people i care about.

Going to be getting my laptop later than sooner it would seem... because of my filming projects i have to go for a upper end laptop. Plus now that i don't work at my job any more i have payments that are falling behind..

on top of that, my mate and i aren't doing well... haven't seen him in... oh... i dunno anymore... over a month at least... the relationship won't repair itself and i have already sacrificed many things in order to keep it going.. eventually i am going to run out of steam on this one...

hmm... i just want to say to all my fur friends and family that i am still hear and that i miss you all..

 OOsarovakOO tagged me...

Im a little bored right now... Cant sleep, and the plane to Egypt leaves in... some hours... So something to do that passes time...

1. Are you single or taken?
Taken

2. Chocolate or flowers?
Both are romantic ^^

3. Will you do anything special for Valentines Day?
*sigh* unforunately my little brothers birthday is on valentines day....

4.Do you like anyone?
don't know what kind of a relationship i would be in if i didn't xP

5. Were you dating anyone last Valentines?
nope

6. What would be your dream Valentines date?
me and my mate alone for the whole day at a place where we will not be pointed out or recognised

7. Do you make a big deal about Valentines?
i can't due to my lil. brothers birthday...

8. Have you ever had a secret admirer?
gaawd yeah... both guys, girls, stalkers...

9. Would you ever write someone a love letter?
A poem.. yes yes...

10. Do you believe in Cupid?
No, because it would get eaten

11. Do your parents give you presents on Valentines?
a card from my mother maybe, but this valentines might be different

12. Do you still send out Valentines cards?
Yeah, tradition thing i guess

13. Do you like candy hearts?
"heres some candy, you look a little thin" XD

14. Is Valentines depressing?
yeah it will be.. i have to spend the day away from my mate

15. How do you feel about PDA?
not very good with acronyms, unless it is an electronic device... they always freeze

16. How is your love life?
good ^^

17. How is your sex life?
woah, easy there space cowboy

18. Have you ever been dumped on Valentines?
Nope

19. How many roses would you want?
don't want any... substitute with cuddling or hugs or something ^^

20. Will you have a boyfriend/girlfriend next Valenitnes?
*sigh* probably not... might be moving state

http://www.theanimalrescuesite.com/clickToGive/

If you could just go to this link.. I would greatly appreciate it..
The advertising costs of the link on the site goes DIRECTLY to Charity for Animals Shelters!!

Thanks.... now... start clicking!

I was working hard (ugggh... Black Friday) and then i got the biggest urge to start writing again. I was so happy to have it again, ideas began forming in my mind, scenarios playing like movie reels in my eyes. The old spark had ignited again and i just wanted to drop what i was doing and go begin to write something (most likely naughty...). I have to admit though, the bike trip home in below freezing temps kind of took it out of me... so i cannot start tonight : /

Also i am having ..er... accesibility errors with all my belongings at the moment... so i may be unable to touch a keyboard without sneeking it in 5 minute amounts... not exactly the creative enviornment that i like ...

Nevertheless, Happy Thanksgiving and praise to all, special love to my closest

wow, when i saw this i just smiled, so cute ^^


http://myspacetv.com/index.cfm?fuse.....ideoid=5198932

http://myspacetv.com/index.cfm?fuse.....deoid=16311091

Well, i have some stuff thats recent, though i'd post it...

The fragile ideas of chosen leaders
Held together by pointless fears
and the Tv shows explode the world
and all the happiness dissapears

---

Now why can't you just answer me?
When i've asked you where you've been?
But its no use... you are talking through a shot glass

---

The best parts of imagination are when i think of you
Nirvanas gates are drawing near and you are standing at the door

My friend was telling me that he liked the more depressing styles *sigh* ... so i took out a piece of paper and wrote him run right in front of him

How far will you go
Till you let them be?
will you travel to hell
so you can see?

That pain is a system
The first step to start
But people take it too far
And tear up their heart

When you feel the pain
The ice cold despair
You rip up the world
Beyond your repair

You have past the horizon
Away from it all
But no matter what
You seem to just fall

Remember that one
The pain in their head
Remember that one?
The one you found dead?

The motionless body
Gunshot to the head
But the last time they talked
There were already dead

They failed to hold it
Keep back all the pain
so they took their lives
Let it wash down the drain

So listen to us
When we talk of pain
If we tear up the world
Then you are to blame

*sighs deeply* didn't like that much... i haven't truly "felt" these lines as i was writing them....

There are more, the stuff that come from my heart, but i'm gonna leave them private... they are for my special mate ^^

---

Edit

---

Well, maybe not all of them are private...These are for you, my love

True feelings of love
That I cannot deny
I felt them with you
When we were shy

I’ll hold you close
and will never part
but you’ll always be close
when you’re in my heart

The love that you give
And the art that you show
Makes my mind race
And my heart to grow

---

Each rose you lay down
Every kind word you speak
Fills my soul with the fire
earns a kiss on your cheek

The distance may lengthen
But I cannot deny
For I love you so much
That the hard times fly by

As you go through your classes
And sit in on your bed
Just know where you lie…
In my heart… and my head

I recently bought i Simpletech (piniferera designed) 500 GB hard drive. As soon as i connected it the thing broke, it wouldn't communicate with my computer... so i go and return it and bring a new one home, thank god it worked and was working quite well, until last night when it just decided to stop communicating.
Now it sits at my feet, making a buzzing noise and being nothing more than an expensive paperweight...

GAH

I am going to freestyle poetry, just to let my thoughts free....

There ain't no bullet wound
but i can tell you are dead
there ain't no mark or bruise
but i know that you've bled

we don't need x rays
or medicine to start
because nothing can cure
a broken heart

you sit there on the floor
forever lost the feeling
staring at the door
your memories are reeling

of the special times you had
of the love that you both shared
but now that they are gone
you wish you hadn't dared

i gaze at you, so down, lifeless
you cry your tears, painfull, shapeless
the moments are gone, drifted away
your love is gone, but here you stay

this is for anyone who has lost someone that they held dear

I am thankful i have someone to love

Life of Brian??? Whos seen it?? Alright heres a REDONE song of always look on the bright side of life!! (sing this to the song :P)

I don't know if you submit things like this ... Sing it with the song!! Enjoy

Okay this is just for a laugh... it also sounds like an advertisement for FA haha... THEME SONG


Chear up everyone! You know what they say!

Soomethings in life are bad, they can really make you mad! Other things just make you swear and curse, when your chewing on lifes gristle... doon't grumble... give a whistle! and this'll help things turn out for the BEEESSST!!!
______________ alright enjoy some

Now when the real world lets you down
You cannot stump and frown
For all you know there's another world out there

When life doesn’t seem to help
don’t sit down and yelp
Cos you always have the other life… in FA

Oooh, always stick with your furry side *whistle*
Use it to escape your regular life *whistle*

The real world can be bad, but furries are not mad
So stick with us and find yourself today
you don’t need to be hurtin’
To be an animal-that’s certain
And you can find us all on… FA

Oooh, Always look to your furry side *whistle*
It helps you make your boring life right *whistle*

Slippin in depression? Then make a small confession
tell yourself that your life is all good
so don’t sit down and mourn, look at some furry pr0n
and have yourself some fun on .. FA

ooooh
Always stick with your furry side *whistle*
Use it to escape your regular life *whistle*

Oooh, Always look to your furry side *whistle*
It helps you make your boring life right *whistle*

These are some lines that i have heard and made myself


"you are the smell in the rain, you are the blood in my vein" - by Brand New

"come now, come,take me to bed, i love you so much that it hurts my head, i don't mind you under my skin, i let the bad parts in the bad parts in" Brand New

"take for me this one last step
The leap that we won't ever forget
leave Chaotic Worlds behind
and find a place thats yours and mine" - Slukaa

"I'd count the days that you are gone...
but you are always in my heart

You'd think i'd spend the time alone...
but you are always in my heart

My love for you always grows...
Because you are always in my heart" -Slukaa

And lastly... my favorite.. from Brand New

"I love you so much, do me a favor baby don't reply, cuz i can dish it out, but i can't take it"

Well ,maybe not, but i have some interesting facts about the mind

A study was done on what the brain does while a person is sleeping, they discovered that it was repeated alot of actions in had performed in the day.

Also, memory is the craziest thing. The mind is constantly taking memories, extracting them, and then storing them somewhere else. It is possible for the memory to change multiple times when it is being moved.

Also, the brain only remembers certain pieces of an event that had occured in the past. The rest?.. well, the brain just guesses, thats right, it GUESSES. Have you ever had an argument with someone over a past event and you are both entirely sure its happened the way you remember it? Theres an example, the mind guesses and just makes something up, so your memory might not be as accurate as you think

Did you know that there is a blind spot in your eye? In facct, its right in the middle of your eye. It is the part where the optic nerve connects to the back of your eye. There are no recepters in that area, but why aren't you noticing a black hole in your vision? Because, once again, the mind just guesses, well not fully, but to an extent. It takes the surrounding information and uses it to guess what to fill that black hole in with.

Well, i have many more crazy things on the brain haha, talk to me about perspective reality and we could dive into that for a while.

Its amazing though, the human mind is more complicated than we could ever imagine

G'day!
It has been a full month since i have registered with FA and gotten into this fandom fully and i couldn't be any more happier with how its going :)
I feel lucky to have met some of the greatest people out there and i just can't thank you enough for giving me the chance to talk with you

Cheers, hope to chat with you in the not-too-distant future

I am getting surgery to have my tonsils taken out on the 6th. First time surgery, in and out job, but its gonna suck afterwards.

alright i guess i'll just lay it out

Went to mall with 2 girls (don't usually do that so its kinda weird) and they were chattin bout something bad the whole time... i was very confused
Later we went to a movie which was also fun, but after that things got weird. One of the girls joined me back in my truck cos she smokes and needed that ciggarette lighter in my car.
She then talked to me for an hour and told me that she recently got pregnant! WITH TWINS ! she continued to tell me how she went and got an abortion and all the anti abortion protesters yelled at her. Then the "father" decided to move to california, leaving her behind.

After that, she said that i was a real nice guy- then said that she needed a nice guy in her life.... that was awkward, i wish i could have just said.. "i'm gay, sorry"

All in all it was an awkward evening

i seem to be in the mood so i am gonna make one up

All those who are brave
and fight for us all
continue to live
while weaker ones fall

they travel the country
and battle the hard
while others will stay
view the world in a shard

i dedicate this poem
to those who fight
who turn to to the battle
and don't cower in fright

_____change in style, but it all is the same__________
For all those who find that they can be free
without hiding or masking their identity
i dedicate this and give it to you
for you are as brave as your mind is true
don't beg for forgiveness or start to suffer
cos you'll always have us, as we have eachother



.... lame.... yay for freestyle thinking

total time taken... 3 minutes..

last week..my engine light went on... took it to mechanics and they fixed it

tonight... my engine light went on... 6 days after they "fixed" the engine


Now i gotta take it back...

DAmmit

tried to put some color in this sketch and i am using photoshop, however it will either take a Really long time to get it decent or it will just ruin it

Is there anything else out there? besides coloring it in with pencils?

Aii...

decided after i got back from work that i needed to try and learn to draw. My ideas and images are trying to get to my paper, but my hands aren't experience enough. Quite frustrating because i know people that are just good and without much work. I wish i was the same

Its nearly 3 am and i should just stop trying tonight.... *sigh**slides into bed*

I guess i still have tomorrow, no lessons, no job

Rattling on right now, the ideas are trying to get out of my head. Have you ever experienced that? It just irritates you, like nagging younglings. it drives me crazy



saw hostel 2 yesterday. Is it strange that i was not disgusted in any way by that movie? Everybody in the cinema was freaking out (all guys especially when she cut off guys genitals) but it just didn't affect me...

i plan to put more of my stuff on soon


warm nights in rivers lay
can't keep our feelings at bay
to seek what we hold dear
true happiness, no pain, no tear

Winged lovers in the sky
the love is never passing by
the animals gather in to stop
and revere the feelings of the night

yet thou art true to fly by?
and leave those lovers in the sky
from heartbreak you get them to stop
and leave each alone with lost feelings of the night

yes i must pounce on you love giver
swiftly heartache you deliver
scales cease to touch in the night
the mingling fur parts from site

all animals born to feel these things
are yours to grasp and make it sting
fly by love giver leave our site
and let us share this night tonight

Grew up in australia, if you want animals of all sorts i suggest you head on down to the good ol AUS.

I grew up around reptiles and often spent whole days with them, i then was forced to move to Colorado and found that my climate of aus was great and the coldness of CO sucks. Cannot live under 70 degree heat without at least 3 layers on.

i love photoshop and wish i had more time to do it, my drawing skills are beyond the point of showing any skill at all so i am forced to create different things




any info just talk to me ;)