Returned to here with a few concerned notes but I deserve that.

Anyway I'm finally on spring break. This semester has been even more stressful than the last but I'm still pulling through.

Commission refunds are still being offered and I will note the clients very soon if they would still want their art or a refund.
Do not worry, although I am nearing the last of my budget I have not touched the money from unfinished commissions. I am very strict on my policy and have not run off with others' money for myself, ask family for financial help, or dip into my inheritance. I earn my own money and will spend that money on necessities like food and bills, if there's some disposable income...Japanese candies! :9

IN OTHER NEWS (AKA HERE COMES THE WHINY PART, DON'T READ IF YA DON'T WANT TO)
Last night was a really scary experience. There was a shooting VERY close by. My partner and I heard six rounds of gun fire and a few minutes later we were surrounded by cop patrol.
I wouldn't say the shots were fired in the apartment complex but rather the neighbourhood that's just over the fence (which we are closest to). I am still waiting to see if it appears on the news because I'm very curious to know what happened.
I've always run into the aftermath of such an event but never actually been near one when it happens.
Anyway I've already shaken that off by now and will be calming the mind today at the library or elsewhere. We've already accepted that the real world can be a cold and harsh place but also beautiful.

I want to try to pull myself together this week since I've been such an absolute mess since last summer. I have pretty much disconnected with a lot of my friends due to college stress but am trying to talk to them again. They were very understanding...and I'm still surprised how much support I am receiving despite the broken promises I have made this year. You guys are the best and I owe so much.
I know I probably sound like a broken record but hopefully I will get that motivation back very soon.

Hopefully today I can find the time to do some streaming so stay tuned for that. :3 I want to try and finally make more progress on Jeffe's commish and possibly start on brutuscroc's. I have about two weeks of college left after the break is over so it won't be long until I have allllll the time to catch up.

Thanks for your patience and understanding, guys. I don't know how you can put up with me being a whiny idiot for almost a year. I complain and complain instead of doing something productive. :<
uGH YOU GUYS ARE JUST TOO AWESOME...I DO NOT ASK FOR SYMPATHY OR ANYTHING (YOU CAN BE MAD AT ME ALL YOU WANT I UNDERSTAND) BUT HOW DO YOU HAVE SUCH PATIENCE AND KINDNESS AND DSKJFGHDFJKH.


WELP, I'm done blowing off some steam and whatnot. Remember to watch out for a possible streaming later today or this week! I will make sure to make plenty of coffeeeeeeeeeee.

Pretty much my resolution is to try and clear my mind and focus more on schoolwork. Earlier this year I've been doing fantastic on everything and suddenly went downhill. I was passing my classes during this past fall semester and now I've failed 3 out of 4 classes. Wow.

I also want to start putting even better projects into my portfolio.


Anyway my trip to Las Vegas to see some "unrelated relatives" has been, uh, great? The past week completely sucked because of emotional breakdowns and a terrible cold.
Today, however, I'm feeling better~ No more pain and no more drama (hopefully). I want to get my family some last-minutes souvenirs before I leave on Wednesday.
Honestly I'm pretty eager to get back home to finally settle down...and I mean to ACTUALLY SETTLE DOWN.

I'm going to start off this year with a positive attitude just like the last...just hoping it doesn't end like the last though. ;~;



weh.

I think I'm going to cease accepting future commissions until next year. I've been very irresponsible and will start again when I get my crap together.

May need to visit a therapist soon...I feel my mind slipping away each day and it's really scaring me. I can't even form sentences verbally without stuttering horribly.
I've always refused help throughout my life thinking I could fix my own problems, now they're becoming worse and is making my anxiety and self-esteem issues more difficult to control. I'm tired of it. I can't even focus on schoolwork or even things I enjoy without putting myself down.
I can't even keep promises anymore, it seems. Self-loathe and anxiety keep blocking my way from being productive.

I'd like to ask you what should I do...? I want to seek help but I'm too afraid.
I really, really need help and don't know where to start...

FINALS WEEK IN TWO WEEKS.
WHICH MEANS WINTER BREAK VERY, VERY SOON.
WHICH ALSO MEANS I'LL BE FINISHING UP THINGS I OWE.

This has been one of the most stressful semesters of college yet. Multiple animation classes can get really confusing, haha.

Here's a reminder! For those who are still awaiting OVERDUE COMMISSIONS, you are still eligible for refunds OR extra details to what I owe you! Do not hesitate to ask!

Thank you~

I'm uncertain if I'll be streaming tonight since I must've fugged something up while dusting the inside of my computer. The computer's performance hasn't been affected but it's the internet connection. If I can't get the adapter or whatever the problem fixed I'll go ahead and continue commissions offline.

So the past month I had COMPLETELY FORGOTTEN about the commissions since college has started again and yes I do have the time to work on them this semester even though I'm full-time student. :3
Also I MIGHT accept a few coloured pencil "doodle" commishes about $10 each and I'll put up examples when I whip some up.
Thanks for your patience!

ANYWAY HOW WAS YOU GUY'S SUMMER? Are you going back to school like me, job hunting/working, lounging, or other stuff? It's been a while since I've tried to socialize on the web.


Welp! I'll post the usual submission for streaming if I do get the connection problem fixed~

Today I'm busy getting a majority of my mail brought in and set up BUT I'm not stressed out anymore and I will schedule a livestream for belated commissions around 7:00 PM Central (that's about 6 hrs 30 minutes from now).

I have two new snakes and a reptile rack system I need to pick up from my house and set up~ I'm SO EXCITED! I guess the reason why I was so stressed is because I got too impatient (also I accidentally purchased something extra that made me about $35 in debt but that's fixed now). Aaaa I can't wait~ I am just so happy guys. <3

Thanks for being patient with me (once again haha I am so terrible). I do not plan on accepting commissions again until December but there's a chance I may accept a couple in case of monetary emergencies (mainly gas) so watch out for the journal entries. ^^

I'm going to accept a few more commissions to start next week~
Please refer to the price chart for pricing!
https://www.furaffinity.net/view/10928660/

I'm going to accept another 10 SLOTS.
If you are interested please note me with your paypal address, choice of commission, references and description of how you want your commission to be!

1.  salmy FULL COLOURED SKETCH
2.  forward HALF SKETCH x2
3.  sykezthehusky FULL COLOURED SKETCH
4. Jeffe (via Facebook) FULL COLOURED SKETCH
5.  seashadow FULL SKETCH
6.  decoykun COMIC
7.
8.
9.
10.

These will go for my weekend travel to Arlington, TX! <3
Thanks you guys~

That last journal mentioning how I won't be able to do large commissions until after Wednesday...
Well...
I lied, lol.

I'm almost done with the current list~ 3 out of 4 sketched out and ready for feedback and approval.
http://spam-arts.tumblr.com/post/56.....ut-of-4-of-the

I'm on a rollllllllllllll


So, commissions will reopen by the end of the week or sometime next week (or tomorrow if I can get all these done by today!). <3
You guys are amazing. :3
Thanks for supporting me, omg~ <3333

Just updating you guys about my mother having to depart to China on Wednesday for some family business. My sister and I will not be going but I'm spending some time with my mom until she leaves. She'll only be gone for about a month.
So! The larger commissions will resume after my mother departs but I do plan on getting all the sketches out of the way until then! :3

Also fortunately I start back to school on the 19th next month. I'm pretty excited to go back to school~

Welp, thanks you guys for being super awesome! <3

I am almost done with the last few commissions on the list and would like to go ahead and accept more to start working on this week!
Please refer to this chart here: http://www.furaffinity.net/full/10928660/

NOTE IF YOU ARE INTERESTED! PLEASE INCLUDE YOUR PAYPAL ADDRESS, THE CHOICE OF COMMISSION YOU WANT, A REFERENCE, AND DESCRIPTION OF HOW YOU WANT YOUR COMMISSION TO BE. I WILL SEND YOU AN INVOICE AFTER I'VE RECEIVED YOUR REQUEST!

There are 10 slots available!

1.  Kaze-Breeze-Katakage COLOURED SKETCH
2.  esperthekitteh FULLBODY/COLOUR
3.  thatonedeer FIGHTER/PERSPECTIVE
4.  atlasrysios FLAT/FULL BODY
5.  brutuscroc FLAT/FULL BODY
6.
7.
8.
9.
10.

Welp seems like nobody's interested in the pinup commishies so I've decided to open two slots for whatever you want~
Please refer to my price chart for prices!
http://d.facdn.net/art/spamcat/1372.....pricechart.png

Please send a note if you are interested! Thanks! <3

SLOTS

1.  seawolf-cadet
2.  michichael

I'm going to open ONE slot for a full body, pinup/undies/something sexy theme for $50 if anyone's interested!
I'm breaking out my comfort zone a little and doing a little artistic nudity.
Here's a sketch example: http://25.media.tumblr.com/913c7aca.....1u8o1_1280.png

Please send a note with ref and I will send you my paypal address~
Thankies! <3

THANKS EVERYONE. <3333

I'm opening five slots for commissions!
The types I'm offering are:

Sketch (full-body): $15 USD +5 add character

Coloured sketch(full body): $20 +15 add character

Inks: Bust: $15; Half-body $20; Full: $25

Flat coloured: Bust: $20; Half: $25; Full $30

Fully coloured: Bust: $30; Half: $40; Full: $50

Character ref: Includes Frontal and Hind views plus three expressions. Flat coloured: $95; Shaded: $125

Experimental: $25-60 (NOTE ME FOR MORE INFO; EXAMPLES: http://www.furaffinity.net/view/10597044/ , http://www.furaffinity.net/view/8434676/ , http://www.furaffinity.net/view/8560062/ . STYLE WILL DIFFER.)


Payment will be sent to SPAM_cat[at]live[dot]com!
Please send a note if you are interested!
If there's anything not listed that you are looking for it can be negotiated.
PLEASE NO CHARACTER DESIGNING COMMISSIONS! MUST ALREADY HAVE A REFERENCE, SORRY! D:
Welp I think that's about it for now~

SLOTS:
1.  forgottend Full-body; full coloured
2.  dodgethewolf RESERVED UNTIL JULY 4TH
3.  socksthesneaky COLOURED SKETCH
4.  catwaffles COLOURED SKETCH
5.

MERCI! <3

FINALLY.
I'm bored and wanted to update my journal. Too much caffeinated soap, hehehe.

How's your summer/winter so far? Mine's been dull yet productive although no luck for a job yet, well, maybe for the local Kroger but so far nope. 3:

Welp anyway...here's my year's summary so far.

I'm glad to have finally settle down and finish things up, you know?
From January until last month I've been paying rent for an apartment I never really stayed in during the semester and they're fining me for the damages my roommate did as well as stuff like not vacuuming my room's floor. =_=
Well throughout the first half of the semester I've been staying at a friend's house helping them go to places and such because they're poor and have no way of paying for their car back (I still help them to this day, too, but I don't stay with them anymore). I was also slowly recovering from depression after my ex broke up with me last year.
Since early March I've met someone and started staying at his place most of the time since the second day we've met. The main reason why I took so long for those commissions is because of those reasons as well as my sister claimed my laptop and I had no way to bring my desktop with me (it's HUGE).
I'm still pretty frustrated about myself for not terminating the lease early so I could have saved about $1200+. Oh well.

The past is in the past, right now I'm living with my wonderful boyfriend in an awesome apartment. I feel safe and stable now and able to actually do the things I am suppose to do~ I am happy and motivated, I'm finishing up old things and moving on. My grades this semester were great, too.
I want to try and accomplish more throughout the remaining of the year and I know I can do it~

Thanks for supporting me, friends~

I really don't need much but I need some extra money for gas. So I'm going to open up two slots for coloured sketches!
Please send me a note if you are interested. My paypal is SPAM_cat[AT]live[DOT]com
They are for $20!

1.  ajwolf COMPLETED!
2.  dodgethewolf COMPLETED!

Thank you!

I keep telling myself I only have SIX COMMISSIONS LEFT that would take me at least two hours each but one of the main thing keeping me from doing them is anxiety and forgetfulness...
Bluh, sorry guys for the waiting (again). At least I have two more in progress as of now.
There's another thing keeping me from doing commissions as well. The processor of my computer is pooping out so I'll have to get a new one real soon, that's what has been causing the crazy amount of crashes during streaming, gaming, drawing, and watching videos.
After I've finished these next two commissions I'll accept maybe two slots for sketches and/or chibis if anyone's interested. Simple stuff. The money's going towards a new processor. v.v

Ahh I should sleep now before I end up crashing myself, haha.

I'm back home from A-Kon!
Had fun even though this had got to be the worst A-kon I've attended. XD;
Didn't meet any new people but that's okay. At least I've gotten to meet friends whom I haven't seen in years! ;u; Omg I thought I'd never see them agaaaaiiinn...
Also my everything is sore, hahaha.

I'll also be back to commissions! Will be streaming tomorrow.
Sorry for the extra wait. Also the ones who have waited so long still have the option for a refund if needed! Other than that the commissions will be worked on immediately after I wake up tomorrow.
I appreciate everyone who has been EXTREMELY patient with me. <3

Here's an example of what they'll look like!
http://www.furaffinity.net/view/10709087/
http://www.furaffinity.net/view/10709145/
http://www.furaffinity.net/view/10709178/

I'm going to accept 5 of these commissions before I head over to Dallas, TX this weekend~
Please note me if interested!
EDIT: I'm only taking three slots now! I haven't realized I was going to be a bit busy today but at least I'll have enough for a tank of gas which is good for me! You guys are awesome. :3

EDIT2: randayena bought two slots (decided to accept an extra one)! I'm currently CLOSED and will resume once I've returned from Texas!

They will be full-bodied commissions! Coloured will be $20!

I will stream these tomorrow! Thanks so much. <3

Yes I know I was going to wait until I've finished my current queue but the money's for gas and hotel rent! I'll resume on the list after I return~

1.  thefiddlecat COMPLETE!
2.  caltsar COMPLETE!
3. & 4.  randayena

I'M FINALLY ON SUMMER BREAK!
Also my boyfriend is being deployed out of state for over a week tomorrow so I'll be streaming starting tomorrow night around 6-9pm Central.

If anyone would like to schedule an appointment for streaming, note me!
I'm also going to reopen commissions once EVERY SINGLE ONE from the current commission list has been completed.

I wonder if I should do Iron Artist so I wouldn't make people wait so long like I've done the past year. :<


And for the people who've been waiting, you guys can have the option of a simple background and/or style change/experimental. I'll post a sample of the style I've been practicing on. You are also eligible for a refund for making you guys wait so long~ :3

See you guys tomorrow!

I'm FINALLY getting back to long-awaited commissions. Unfortunately silly me was being all sloppy and disorganized again and forgot what kind of commissions I've accepted. I'm thinking of being generous and making everything full-bodied/more detailed (upon request).
Yes, if you would like a refund I am able to do so~

I want to accept more commissions for experimentation and to save up for a music sampler or keyboard w/synthesizer I've got my eye on (I'm trying my hands on music-making)! :3

Anyway I'm currently in the process of sending out notes about their commissions, I'm not going to get everybody tonight but I'll try to solve and organize everything out by the end of the week.

ALSO FIRST FREAKING DAY WITHOUT TERRIBLE DIZZINESS AND MIGRAINES. ;u;
To let you know, I've gotten two vaccine shots Monday and have been on my butt since Tuesday, BUT NOT TONIGHT!

---

And now for something COMPLETELY different and horrifying, last night a shooting happened at my apartment complex. Fortunately my friends and roommate have not been hurt and I've been out with my boyfriend at the Kroger down the street. I've seen the emergency vehicles speed down the road wondering something big must've happened. When we left and were heading over to the apartments there were so many cops and other emergency vehicles inside the complex and blocking off the side where my apartment is (and that's where I started mentally freaking out).
Here's the news about the shooting: http://www.ksla.com/story/21777885/.....n-lsu-s-campus

The guy who's been arrested tried to sell me drugs and stolen goods once. Him and a few other guys try to sell drugs and stolen goods on campus.
Fortunately my lease will be terminated in May and I'm most likely going to move in to a more secure apartment near the air force base here. v.v

/end

Blagagarargahgahrahghadfksaljdfkasdf sorry for the unexpected disappearance for a while. I haven't been to a computer in over two weeks. v.v
I've been helping out a friend and his mother go to places and other things since their car engine blew out last month (I had to drive 50 miles to get them). 3:

Hopefully I'll be able to get back to my apartment soon so I can do more computer work instead of having to do homework through my phone (IT SUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUCKS).
Anyway, I'm off for now. This was my short time using a computer that isn't mine. aldkfj;ad
be back whenever ; ;

First off: Thanks for notifying me about the thief~ I hope they will stop tracing others' artwork and make profit out of them. Blargh thieves...I have a special hate for those kinds. 3:

Second: Thanks for helping me cope from my anxiety attack at a club party in Texas last weekend. Aaaa, I basically just started thinking too much and scared myself PLUS I've never been to one of those clubs before where you have to have an ID to get in and stuff. It was a little intimidating. :<

Third: Uhhh...OH YEAH! I seriously am still freaking HONOURED to have...fans. Even with all the mess I do and people have to put up with. ^^;
Like how forgetful and lazy I can be. And since there's a reptile show in Pasadena, TX this weekend I'm trying to finish up all my homeworks due next week so I can make it there and hopefully work on at least one commission next week, eueuueueueeuuueeeuu...

And one more thing: I may attend Furry Fiesta next month. I hear it's a small con but everybody's a friend afterwards, and I love making new friends. <3

That's it for now! You seriously don't know how grateful I am how patient and sweet you guys are, aaa...I just need to put myself back together and get things done ASAP.
HNNNGH.

So I'm planning to attend A-kon in Dallas, TX this year~
The meetup idea MAY still happen but I think it'd be a lot better to be at a convention and meet anyone who's attending! ^^
I'm glad some people are interested in the meetup, though!

Anyway~ yesterday I went on an unexpected visit at my grandma's so I wasn't able to get anything done in the past couple of days, grr. But now I'm back at my apartment and will sleep for the night. Hopefully I can get a few done before the week ends. Apologies for being slow but at least I'm pulling through. :>

I've always loved meeting new people and I'm wondering if I could arrange a small meet-up in Dallas, TX since a lot of people live near there. ^^
I don't know when and all, so I'd like to see who all are interested and able to meet up and have some fun!
I don't care how many attend, it could be just one person or twenty (or more!)~
We could hang out at the Galleria (or anywhere that's a good place to hang out). :D

Let's discuss if we can do this! ^^