Wolfe, whenever you get around to reading this, I just wanted to let you know that we're stuck in Mexico on that project that was only supposed to take 3 weeks, it's now a full blown arrangement. They're payin for everything. Which means even spottier Internet than the shit I got now. I'd send ya a note, but you know how that goes.

L8R

So, Wolfe and I are hanging out at the mall, and this fat bitch comes up to us while we're standing in line and shouts "excuse me!" And this was not a nice tone, like "can you tell me the time?" This was a fat whale shouting because she wanted to cut in line.

Wolfe ignored her, I looked at the fat bitch and just turned back around. She repeated herself, "excuse me!"

I was getting ready to make a snarky comment at her (not to her, at her) and Wolfe beat me to it.

"Madam, there is no excuse for you when you are that rude."

To which, the bitch replied, "Excuse me!?" Apparently, fatty is hard of hearing. "You ain't no prize yo'self."

Sometimes, I'm glad Wolfe cuts me off. Like this time, "of course not, the prize you get in your cereal box is twice my size."

"Are you calling me fat?" As if she had to ask.

"Perhaps I was unclear by using too many big words for you, or maybe I was a little too vague in my analogy. I will keep it simplier. Yes." At this point, some random cop wandered closer from somewhere, not a rent-a-cop, a real "I will shoot yo ass, *bang bang*" cop.

Well, fatty decided to keep shouting, "are you deaf? I said EXCUSE ME!"

"I can assure you that unlike your hearing, mine is working just fine. Or more specifically, it 'was' working just fine. Now all I can hear is this loud shrill noise." And I decide to help Wolfe prove his point by snapping by his ear. You know, visual aids for the metally retarded.

"You's in my way. You need ta move." I know that living this close to Detroit means that everyone thinks that they need to be badass, but when you are in a shopping mall in Troy, you are NOT badass.

"Madam, I was clearly in line before you and my transaction is nearing completion, if you will leave me alone so that I may finish..." and fatty decided to cut him off, yet again.

"You 'clearly' ran up here before me so that you could cut me off and make me wait!" I was soo tempted to make a crack about her and running in corrolation (big word for me) to earthquakes, but Wolfe continued.

"The longer we stand here arguing the..." and here comes fatty to cut off Wolfe, again. And at this point, I'm ready to shank this bitch, cop or not.

"Listen here pretty boy, you just need to get the hell outta my way." At this point, I can see that Wolfe is about to make her start crying. Or throw something at he head. Oh wait, that's my reaction to this bitch. Wolfe just stays cool and never raises his voice. It almost makes ME wanna clock his ass, damn he's good.

"Pretty boy? So, I'm pretty and deaf now, huh? So what does that make you, fat and ugly? I would say we should swap roles to be fair, but that would make me pretty and fat and just leave you deaf and ugly and that just seems mean spirited. Although you are holding up your end of this little arrangement, regardless of which role you choose to take."

And all the while, Wolfe at some point got his credit card back, grabbed his bag and receipt and started heading towards the door. Fatty decided to get the cop involved, "aren't you going to arrest him?"

The cop replied with, "what would you have me arrest him for? Speaking his mind or telling the truth? Neither of which are against the law. I suppose I could always arrest you for public disturbance."

Wolfe shouted back as we walked out the store, "I'm not sure your squad car can hold her."

Wolfe probably saved my ass from being arrested.

Wolfe, my hero.

The unsung hero.

He tries so hard to be polite to everyone and not start anything. Why do people have to push his buttons?

So Wolfe and I were hanging out at the mall and some dipshit punk teenagers who thought they were tough badasses because there were 4 of them, started talkin' shit and fuckin' with other mall patrons. The ringleader started eyeballin' Wolfe and I. Wolfe couldn't give a shit one way or the other. I was ready to bust the little fuck nuts skull clean open and play hackey sack with his brain. As I'm sure it was probably of sufficient size (or smaller).

Wolfe tells me to ignore them and keeps walkin', totally unphased by their dipshittery (yeah, that's a new word I invented). The ringleader, let's call him Captain Asshat, starts shoutin' at us.

"Hey, fagboys!"

This just goes to show the level of their intelligence, more specifically, the lack there-of. Anyway, Wolfe ignores them and keeps walking. Never once swaying, staggering, hesitating, or showing even the slightest hint of acknowledgement. At this point, I'm beggin' Wolfe to let me knock them around a bit. He just smiles and says, "you think they're worth it?"

That kinda pissed me off because I knew (and obviously, so did he) that they weren't. I'd be lucky to get in a hit on any of them. They'd all run while laughing and still talkin' shit. And even if I did manage to catch up and beat the hell out of them, it wouldn't be as satisfying. For some reason, having to chase after them, through a mall with all those witnesses only catching me beating some punk kids and not seeing the instigation part...

Yeah, it really wasn't worth it.

However, Asshat decided he wanted to show just how much of a badass he really was. So he hops up off his little seat on the planter and almost comes bounding toward us. Wolfe keeps walking. Now, I really wanna know why Asshat thought this was a good idea. But he asks Wolfe, loud and clear, which managed to get a few heads to turn, "hey, you gay!?"

Before I finish, I have to ask again, why did he think that asking that was a good idea? Or was he hoping to start something? Anyway, "hey, you gay!?"

And without missing a beat, Wolfe looked at him up and down real quick and replied just as loud as he did, "nope, but even if I was you'd be one of the safest mutha-fuckers here!" And kept right on walking.

I was in so much shock at his reply that I followed in step and didn't start to laugh until we were a few paces away. I guess it was a shock for Asshat too because it took him a minute before he shouted "fuck you!"

The best part was the old lady that shouted "Jeffery!" Looks like Asshat's mom caught him being naughty. I turned around to catch mom yelling at little Jeffy, and Wolfe just kept right on walking. I think this was the second funniest thing I have ever heard come from Wolfe.

Copy pasta stolen from  wolfemasters because we already talked about it on the phone and I completely agree with him. You fuckers need to grow up and stop your bitchin' already.

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Subject: When you say "that's so gay," do you realize what you say?
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Yes, as a matter of fact I do.

I am sure you have all seen that commercial on television that says exactly what my subject title says. So here goes a rant about how I feel about it.

<rant> I am not saying, "that's homosexual." I am using the term gay in the same way that many other words in the English language have adapted a new meaning. The word gay means:

1. Having or showing a merry, lively mood: gay spirits; gay music.
2. Bright or showy: gay colors; gay ornaments.
3. Given to or abounding in social or other pleasures: a gay social season.
4. Licentious; dissipated; wanton: The baron is a gay old rogue with an eye for the ladies.
5. Homosexual.
6. Of, indicating, or supporting homosexual interests or issues: a gay organization.
–noun
7. A homosexual person, esp. a male.
–adverb
8. In a gay manner.

The original meaning of the word meant happy. Plain and simple. So you gay people, should I be just as pissed that you have turned the word into a derogatory meaning? Hell no. That is part of the English language. To change and adapt words to new meanings.

Fag by definition means:

1. To tire or weary by labor; exhaust (often fol. by out): The long climb fagged us out.
2. British. to require (a younger public-school pupil) to do menial chores.
3. Nautical. to fray or unlay the end of (a rope).
–verb (used without object)
4. Chiefly British. to work until wearied; work hard: to fag away at French.
5. British Informal. to do menial chores for an older public-school pupil.
–noun
6. Slang. a cigarette.
7. A fag end, as of cloth.
8. A rough or defective spot in a woven fabric; blemish; flaw.
9. Chiefly British. drudgery; toil.
10. British Informal. a younger pupil in a British public school required to perform certain menial tasks for, and submit to the hazing of, an older pupil.
11. A drudge.

Fag means cigarette, did you get that? Do you get pissed off when someone says "that's retarded?" No. Why? Because it is not calling something "a mentally handicapped person." The statement is the same as saying "that's stupid." It is part of the English language to have multiple definitions for a word or statement.

So, to answer the question of that stupid commercial on television...

When you say "that's so gay," do you realize what you say?

Yeah, I know exactly what I'm saying. And that commercial is gay, stupid, retarded, and mis-informational to everyone. Why don't you educate everyone instead of trying to tell them they are stupid for using slang. Because that is exactly what the statement "that's gay," is. If you are going to piss and moan because someone says "that's gay," then you need to start yelling at every person out there that uses the term "nigga." Every person that says "cracka, cracker, gook, beaner, brownie, raghead..." Hell, any of these words: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/List_of_ethnic_slurs

Go ahead and check that link, this journal can wait while you read every slur there. When you get done, come back here and finish reading.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Yeah, there were more there than you thought.

Nigga and nigger are two completely different words, but if you are going to get pissed because I said "that's gay," than don't get pissy with me because you said "what's up mah nigga?" Because that is just as offensive. If you want to bitch and whine that "that's gay" is derogatory, than you need to start complaining about everything else that can be considered just ass offensive.

More than 50% of the English language was CREATED from slang.

Are you going to yell at every teenager out there that wears their pants hanging off their ass? No? Why not? The original meaning behind that "fashion trend" was to signify that a prison inmate was someone's bitch.

Not every black person out there is your "brother."
Just because someone lives in or near Detroit, does not make them "ghetto" nor do they live in the "ghetto."
Not everyone who wears black is "emo."
Not all New Yorkers are pricks.
Not all gamers are nerds/geeks.
Not all college graduates are smart.
Not all Asians are terrorists of Alcaida.
Not everyone on the Internet cares if you are leaving and never coming back (it's the Internet, you're coming back).
(Believe me, I could keep going)

And the best one of all...

You ready for it?

NOT EVERY FURRY IS A BUTT FUCKING HORN BALL LOOKING TO SCREW ANYTHING WITH A TAIL!

Grow the fuck up and stop telling me that "that's gay" is such a wrong, horrible and derogatory statement! </rant>

I need to stop now, I get a headache every time I see those stupid commercials and I need to go to bed.

There is absolutely no reason that anyone should be here.

I don't know you and I sure as hell don't want to know you.

So piss off.