and i'm 23.
ew.

i slept until 1pm and made myself a hot pocket.
and it's pouring outside.

HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO ME

With the roommate moves that happened in the last week we had to set up a new Internet account and it won't be back until the 8th. Progress is still happening on the commissions I owe. So no worries there. Sorry I haven't been able to update. Phone service here is pretty shittastic, too. :c

i haven't been able to work on art for a few days
i'm busy with trying to calm myself down enough to concentrate.
i found out my grandfather has inoperable lung cancer
he lives in florida and i don't have the money to go see him.
so i'm sorry for those very few of you who did commission me.
i'm trying really hard not to have an emotional breakdown what with everything else going on right now.

i'm sorry.

if you need me email me.
i will work on your pieces still, starting tomorrow, but progress will be slow.
i'm sorry, ya'll.

Holy hot dammit balls.
That's a pretty nifty milestone~

Thank you all for being wonderful!

<3

So yesterday I didn't work at all because I had a previous engagement with a bunch of friends at the docks.
Today, I will try to get some work done but there's a lot going on here at the house, with roommates getting ready to move out and roommates getting ready to move in.

If I do end up working today I will post a stream link so that ya'll can watch.

I'll be working on a colored sketch commission as well as the YCH piece.

There's a chance I'll do sketch doodle freebies as a warm up for my hand. The poor gets cramped so easily now since I just recently got back into drawing as much as I have been.

So I'm actually really excited!
I started my first YCH (found here) auction and it was closed within a day because two wonderful people bought out the slots!

Thank you to & for buying out those slots! I'm just waiting on Emails now and then I can get started!

Also!

Commissions are still open! I only have one slot nabbed up by and I'm excited to get some more! I missed working on art, guys, and I love that I'm already starting to get some stuff on my plate. It's actually really lifting my spirits!

Here is the link to the journal about my commissions. I still have four slots open, ya'll!
http://www.furaffinity.net/journal/5855618/

Thank you and have a perfect day, you fuzzy love butts! <3

So, after a long while getting stuff together I will be opening up for a small handful of commissions! I was also let go from my second job (I still have one part-time job that gives me 15 hours a week) a few days ago, so I need another way to bring in some money. I'm going to be signing a lease to live in a wonderful house in the next couple of weeks and doing these commissions will definitely help out! I have a couple different things to offer and you will find those below. I'll only be taking five spots so don't be afraid to hop in and claim one!

Colored Sketches
$10 - For one character
$15 - For two characters
Example One
Example Two
Example Three

Inked and Colored, Simple Background
$15 - For one character
$20 - For two characters
Example One (NSFW)
Example Two
Example Three

Inked, Colored, Shaded, Semi-Simple Background
$25 - For one character
$35 - For two characters
Example One
Example Two


Spots!

1 - ~ Single Char/Inked/Color/Simple BG ~ Paid

2 -

3 -

4 -

5 -

Completed

- Colored Sketch

Terms of Service

One
I take PAYPAL. And when you send me payment put ONLY your FA name in the message area. This is a big stickler for me. My Paypal address is CandiixCoolfxButt [at] HotMail.Com.

Two
I have every right to deny your commission. Don't get mad at me if I give you a valid reason for why I can't/won't/choose to not do your commission.

Three
I ask for payment up front, but only AFTER you have given me details and we work out everything else.

Four
There are a few things I won't draw. And those are children/babies/cubs in adult situations, anything that belongs in the toilet, and diapers in adult situations. I, however, will at least TRY to draw everything else EXCEPT for those things mentioned.

Five
I will NOT respond to notes sent to me through FA. If you want to contact me for a commission or something else like a trade, EMAIL ME at FearTheVisionary [at] gmail.com. If you send me a note, it will be ignored, I'm sorry.


Thank you in advance!

1. What is your name and gender?
Allie (Jae), female though gender fluid

2. What is your partners name and gender?
Sarah and she is alllll female

3. How old are you?
22

4. How old is your partner?
18

5. Age difference?
About four years! Her bday is in May~

6. What is your sexual Orientation/Preference?
For simplicity's sake I'm a lesbian. But going deep down into it I really couldn't give less of a fuck.

7. How long have you two been together?
For a little over 6 months!

8. What do you like about your partner?
She's never afraid to tell the truth. If something is bothering her she will come right out with it. She isn't afraid to call me out on my shit (which I know I have a lot of) and that just makes it so much easier to have the honesty thing between us. She is also my exact opposite in every perfect way.

9. Will you be spending this valentines day together?
Hopefully! We both probably work, since we both work at the same restaurant, but we will find some time to spend together for sure!

10. What's your ideal, romantic date?
Swimming during the day in one of the many water falls in the mountains, laying out on the rocks under the stars while sharing a toke, then going home to share a bottle of wine while taking a nice relaxing bubble bath.

11. What is the nicest thing your partner has done for you?
Sarah does everything for me. There's no 'one nicest thing' that she's done because everything she does is just too utterly perfect. She's stayed by my side through my bullshit, she goes out of her way to make sure I'm happy, she cares about me more than anyone.

12. What is the most romantic moment you two shared?
Recently it was when we took a candle lit bath together and drank red wine with strawberries while listening to soft music.

13. Personal question time: Have you two gone "all the way?"
Ooohhh yeah.

14. If so, when was your first time?
At a party at my friend's house over the summer. Her and I had already established that we liked each other very much and the night before the party we had shared our first kiss. She ended up showing up at the party and we were inseparable all night. My buddy (who was throwing the party) saw this and offered us a spare bed room for the night~ hueuheuheueheuheueh

15. Have you taken a bath/shower together at all?
I rarely shower alone now haha

16. Do you live together?
No, but I'm at her house ALLLLLL the god damn time.

17. Do you find your partner attractive?
Omfg. Can we just talk about how absolutely sexy/stunning/gorgeous/beautiful she is?

18. Any turn-ons?
The way she looks at me when I tease her.

19. Do you see marriage in your future?
Yes yes yes yes

20. What about kids?
HHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHA. no.

21. Do you like valentines day?
Eh. It's just another commercialized holiday.

22. What is your favorite thing to do with your partner?
Smoke a bowl and cuddle on the couch while watching Desperate Housewives or American Horror Story.

23. What is your guys' song?
We actually don't have one, haha

24. And lastly, any final thoughts on your relationship?
Sarah has seriously made me a better person and she continues to do so. We are vastly different but the way that we fit together is perfect and I never plan on letting something like that go.

huh.

guess i missed that.

WELL THANKS, GUYS!

<3

I guess I just wanted to make this post in order to remember the amazing little ratties that I've had over my life. Granted, I haven't owned rats for that long (my first pair was in 2009), but every single rat that I've owned has found a way into my heart. So... here's a little memorial post for the ones I've lost, I guess. I figured it'd be nice since I recently lost the two brothers within a week and a half of each other.

Jaquolin and Sullivan (The Sisters)
Indie and Coo (The estranged sisters)
Quinn (The bald little girl)
Sable (The Powerpuff Mother)
Razzdle Dazzle and Roozle Poozle (The Fabulous Brothers)

Sable's daughters (Blossom, Bubbles and Buttercup) were re-homed and so I don't know their status, but I'm sure that they're happy whether they're with new mom's and dad's or over the rainbow bridge cuddling up to their mom.

<3

I will always remember the ones I've lost and the lessons that having those wonderful souls taught me.
They're going to make me a better mom for my newer boys:
Raditaz (a six month old PEW) and Gollum (age unknown since he was adopted, but probably almost 2 years old Hairless).

I love these boys and I will do everything in my power to make their lives amazing. <3

so yup.
woke up at 2am with a horrendous pain.
went to er.

have a kidney infection.

YAAAAAAAAAAAAY.

:I

Until I get a new computer.
I'm tired of not wanting to post my paper doodles because I hate posting pictures of well... pictures.
I just wanna fuckin' draw and show it off without having to dig through looseleaf or find a fucking sketch book.
I've also just been lazy on hunting down a good sketch book.

dkjfhskdjhfjksd

I miss this site.
I'm just never hear anymore.

WAAAAAH.

-flop-

So last night I took my coworker and her friend out for my coworker's 21st.
We ended up at this place called Red Square.
Well we pay the $3 cover to get in, get our hand stamps and go in and try to find a place to chill.
Place was packed, so we turn around to dip and just come back later since we have our nifty hand stamps!
Well, right before we even get out the door a bouncer stops us and asks where we were going.

Hannah: "No room to party."

Bouncer: "Well then follow me. I'm taking you to the Blue Room."

So we follow bouncer guy back to the Blue Room.
Blue Room is awesome.
It ain't a VIP room, though, so don't get me wrong there.

He goes up to the bartender (a super cute girly) and says something to her then comes back over to us an wishes that we have a good time and peaces out for his Bouncer-y duties.

So, the three of us go get drinks, I ask bartender how much and she says the best thing I heard all night last night:

"Olly's got you girls."

WE ENDED UP ON A BOUNCER'S TAB.
WE RACKED UP AT LEAST $300 ON THIS GUYS TAB.
FOR NOTHING.

LIKE.
WHAT.

I can't even.

Lululululululuu

a simple kiss would ever get me so worked up again.
i got to dances for the gay community and stupid shit happens when i just diddle around with girls, get their number and then end up ignoring them >.>

but last night, jessica was there.
and she kissed me.
and I melted.
haven't melted like that in so long.

omg.

just. the feels. so many of them.
so many amazing feels.

i really like this girl.
so much.
ksjdfhskjdf

SO I HAVE COME INTO POSSESSION OF A BRAND NEW SUPER SLIM PS3.
Omg. The super slim model is so sexy.
I just wanna. SKJDHSKJDHSK.

-drool-

Anyways!

Add me on PSN!

I have Borderlands 2 and Assassin's Creed 3!
MULTIPLAYYYERRRRRRR.

My PSN name is StarFruitAttack

<3

Soooooooooo my promotion went through today! I am now a Third Key Assistant Manager at FYE! I've been working so hard for this and all of it finally paid off! I'm so fucking excited. In frying the bar tomorrow night to fucking celebrate. Any of you Vermont furs are welcome to come along!

Now if I could only get my winter coat back from the dirty cunt who stole it! :D

Pokemon Black 2.
Special Edition Strategy Guide.

So. Much. Happy pee.

Fuuuuuuck.

I love how it's set two years after the events of Black/White.
I love how you can see characters from Black/White in their new positions.

Omfg.

JKSDHKSJDHKSJD

I already defeated the first gym last night. I've been grinding since then.

ALSO. THEY FINALLY ADDED ANOTHER POISON GYM.
FUCK. YES.

-explodes-

<3

So my old one got hacked, so I made StarFruitAttack

ADD ME! :D

Fuck yes.

I love living in VT, where every freaking town has their own farmer's market on different days of the week.
I just moved to Winooski, and their farmer's market is just a minute walk from my apartment. It's a lot smaller than the Burlington market (which takes up the ENTIRE park and one of the side streets on Saturdays) but it has AMAZING stuff.

I just grabbed three local yukon gold potatos, a honeydew, a cantaloupe, a thing of strawberries, a loaf of roasted potato bread and a jar of strawberry jam.

All of it is organic.

...and fucking delicious.

JKSDHKLJSDHLJKSDHLKSJD

I love Vermont.

;.;

Stolen from

A - Age: Twenty

B - Bed size: Leather couch

C - Chore you hate: I love cleaning >.>

D - Dog's name: Rocko

E - Essential start your day item: Taking my morning bowel movement. (Shut up, everyone does it.)

F - Favorite color: Blue, orange and purple.

G - Gold or Silver: Silver

H - Height: 5'4.5"

I - Ireland or Italy: Erin go Braugh!

J - Job title: Sales Associate at FYE

K - Kid(s): Someday. Though for right now I have 8 ratties who are my babies :3

L - Living arrangements: Apartment/Duplex thingy with Dingo and Jess

M - Mom's name: Beth

N - Nicknames: Allie, Jae, Jae-Jae, JB, Coolf, Coolfbutt, Coolfpup, Bitch, Hobag, StarFruit, SF

O - Overnight hospital stay other than birth: When I got pretty busted up in a soccer game. Ended up with cracked ribs, nerve damaged arm and a major concussion.

P - Pet Peeve(s): People who think they know what they're talking about when they obviously don't. People who talk way too loud. Other people using my laptop. People touching my phone without asking. People who are far too judgmental.

Q - Quote from a movie: "I see now that the circumstances of one's birth are irrelevant. It is what you do with the gift of life that determines who you are." ~ Mewtwo

R - Righty or Lefty: Righty

S - Siblings: Two half brothers, one half sister and one step sister.

T - Time you wake up: Between 6 and 7 most days.

U - Underwear: ...What underwear?

V - Vegetables you dislike: Spinach.

W - Water or land: Water.

X - X-rated or PG: Both. Depends on the quality, though.

Y - Yesterday's best moment: When I wasn't in as much pain as I was the night before.

Z - Zoo favorite: Kangaroos or Otters. Oh, also Giraffes. :|

I'm not in any way a 'religion hater' or 'God hater'. I am simply a spiritual Agnostic who doesn't know what to believe in other than herself, the Earth and her bounty. But something has been annoying me recently.

I've seen/heard a few people I know and don't know talking about how they thank God for giving them a second chance at life. I have had to seriously ponder just what they mean... I've watched these particular people make huge steps and turn around their life into something that is more fitting for them and will surely be the pathway to what will end up being a better life for them, but the fact that they give the thanks to God or whatever celestial being may be watching over us all... it irks me.

I've always been told to believe in myself, and some of the people who tell me this are those very same people who are chalking off their current success to some all powerful being who may or may not even exist. Why can't these particular people take a step back from what I have taken to calling a 'celestial delusion' and give /themselves/ the credit they deserve? Whether or not there is a God or multiple gods, why can't they take their own advice and believe in themselves rather than looking to the sky and asking for help from/thanking some questioned being for their success? YOU are the ones who took those steps to become better, YOU are the ones who decided to finally turn your life around.

Believe in yourselves for once... Please, just take your own advice.

Stolen from coz why not?


001. Name → Allison
002. Nickname(s) → Jae, Allie, bitch, whore, faggot, Allister (oh god middle school)
003. Status → Single, stupidly waiting.
004. Zodiac sign → Scorpio
005. Male or female → Female
006. Elementary → Crofton Elementary, Davidsonville Elementary, Crofton Elementary (I moved a lot)
007. Middle School → Benjamin Tasker Middle School, Crofton Middle School (again with the moving)
008. High School → Arundle High School, Northeast High School (and again... more moving...)
009. Smart → With certain things
010. Hair color → Auburn, if I sit out in the sun long enough I turn into a ginger, though.
011. Long or short → Longish, need to cut it
012. Loud or Quiet → Depends on who I'm talking to/around
013. Sweats or Jeans → Jeans, sweats on my lazy I-feel-like-being-a-jock-again days
014. Phone or Camera → Phone
015. Health freak → To a point. Hard to escape that part of me really. :I
016. Drink or Smoke? → Yeeeeeup.
017. Do you have a crush on someone? → -Shrug-
018. Eating or Drinking → Heh. Both. Maybe too much.
019. Piercings → One, in my lip, left side. Wish I had more, though.
020. Tattoos → I need some. I have sooooo many planned, including an Arbok chest piece and a pirate sleeve.

HAVE YOU EVER BEEN IN...?
019. An Airplane → Yes.
020. A Car Accident → Very, VERY minor.
021. A Fist Fight → Yes.

FIRSTS:
022. First Piercing → My ears, mum and dad took me to get them done when I was fucking TWO MONTHS OLD.
023. First Best Friend → Uhm... Is it bad that I can't remember because of moving around so much? Though I'd have to say Sarah, Frank an Alley were all my besties once I settled around the PG County area.
025. First Award → First place in a beauty I was in when I was one year old
026. First Crush → Probably fourth grade.
027. First pet → Taz, a little beagle mix.
028. First Big Vacation → Uhm... Disney World? Maybe?

LASTS:
029. Last Person You Talked To → Skittle
030. Last Person You Texted → K2
031. Last Person You Watched A Movie With → K2, Netflix, yo.
032. Last Food You Ate → Coco Pebbles rice crispy treat thingy
033. Last Movie You Watched → Whatever was on Netflix.
034. Last Song You listened To → Whatever is on in Starbucks right now.
035. Last Thing You Bought → ...Lol. What's money?
036. Last Person You Hugged → K2? I think. I don't even know.

FAVES:
037. Food → Starfruit, Strawberries comes in a VERY close second with those being much more common and all.
038. Drinks → Fruity tea and Dr. Pepper.
039. Clothing → Slightly baggy jeans and t-shirts.
040. Book → Far too many to pick a favorite. But my recent favorite was Death Troopers.
041. Music → Anything with a beat.
042. Flower → Tulips. They're a guilty love of mine.
043. Colors → Between blue, orange and purple.
044. Movies → Terribad horror movies.
045. Shoes → My ratty ass, knock-off converse xD
046. Subjects → Science

IN THE PAST YEAR I...
047. [x] Kissed In The Snow
048. [ ] Celebrated Halloween
049. [x] Had Your Heart Broken
050. [ ] Went Over The Minutes On Your Cell Phone
051. [ ] Someone Questioned Your Sexual Orientation
052. [ ] Came Outta The Closet
053. [ ] Gotten Pregnant
054. [ ] Had An Abortion
055. [x] Done Something You've Regretted
056. [x] Broke A Promise
057. [x] Kept A Secret
058. [x] Pretended To Be Happy
059. [x] Met Someone Who Changed Your Life
060. [ ] Pretended To Be Sick
061. [ ] Left The Country
062. [x] Tried Something you normally wouldn't like, and liked it
063. [x] Cried Over The Silliest Thing
064. [x] Ran A Mile
065. [ ] Went To The Beach
066. [ ] Stayed Single

CURRENTLY:
067. Eating → Nothing
068. Drinking → Water
069. Getting Ready To → Take Skittle to work
070. Listening To → Music in Starbucks and longing to get behind the counter and make the damn coffee.
071. Plans For Tomorrow/Today → Work and write
072. Waiting For → ...A whole hell of a lot.

YOUR FUTURE:
073. Want Kids? → Definitely. But only once I really know I'm ready.
074. Want To Get Married? → Yeah, but all of that is kinda retarded right now.
075. Careers in mind → Vet tech, Soccer coach, free-lance writer

WHICH IS BETTER ON A BOY/GIRL?
076. Lips Or Eyes → Eyes
077. Shorter Or Taller? → Doesn't really matter. But shorter is a plus~
078. Romantic Or Spontaneous → I love romance but someone who is willing to pick up her shit and get in a car and just... go somewhere is amazing, too.
079. Nice Stomach Or Nice Arms → Stomach. Although... I don't mean a six-pack or anything. I mean. Anything that I think is nice. Be it a six-pack or be a little extra to love. Basically, I just love tummies <3
080. Sensitive Or Loud → Both is perfect
081. Hookup Or Relationship → Neither right now.
082. Troublemaker Or Hesitant → Someone who can get into trouble without being caught because they're smart about it? ._.

HAVE YOU EVER:
083. Lost Glasses/Contacts → I lose glasses ALL the time. Hence I don't have any right now >.>
084. Ran Away From Home → Yup.
085. Held A Weapon, For Self Defense → Mmmmmhm.
086. Killed Somebody → Lolno.
087. Broken Someone's Heart → I guess? I dunno.
088. Been Arrested → Doesn't being tossed in a holding cell for a few hours count?

DO YOU BELIEVE IN:
090. Yourself → Right now? Not at all.
091. Miracles → Depends on what happens, really.
092. Love At First Sight → ...Yeah...
093. Heaven → Nope. But I do believe in an after-life.
094. Santa Claus → Nope.
095. Sex On The First Date → Depends on some things.
096. Kiss On The First Date → Yup.

ANSWER TRUTHFULLY:
097. Is There One Person You Wanna Be With, Right Now? → Oh fuck yeah.
098. Are You Seriously Happy With Where You Are, In Life? → Not at all.
099. Do You Believe In God → I believe in a high power, but not 'God'.
100. Post As 100 Truths And Tag sum people → Not taggin' anyone. :I