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A Serious Journal Update
Posted 3 weeks agoA heads up to those who actually bother to read this, this journal is going to delve into some serious topics that showcase where I have been mentally as of late, and it will be a little heavy, so CW for that
In addition, to be as direct as I can, I am not asking for sympathy or advice from others, I realize that my route to self-improvement is 100% my responsibility as much as I appreciate the notion otherwise.
This is a rare instance where I have to take the mask off and be vulnerable for a second, because I've let myself bottle my own feelings for far too long and it's reaching a boiling point and I have nowhere else to turn to offload things. Apologies also if I have not been responding to people online as well, that has been a symptom of my mental state. As many of you are aware (at least to those who still keep up with my twitter account), in September of last year I lost my apartment with my boyfriend after losing my job and being unable to find new work at that point. Things are better now that I've got both a job and a place to live, but the weight of losing a place to live TWICE really starts to take a toll on a person after a while. It's gotten to the point where I feel I have genuinely developed an anxiety disorder and CPTSD from various events which I will not go into detail here that I have had to put up with all my life, and it's deeply affected my commissions and why I still haven't had the chance to be able to clear out my queue, so I deeply apologize for taking so long even now while I am trying my hardest to clear that out with my available time and energy.
It's in this onslaught of anxiety that I'm realizing that I haven't been able to talk to almost anyone about these anxieties, because for as long as I have been alive, I have been forced to internalize my own thoughts and feelings because I was repeatedly told by those around me growing up that, 'Oh, you don't have it as bad as others in the world, you're just being selfish,' which in turn has led into this incredibly self-destructive behavior of not wanting to speak about my personal issues because I have convinced myself that everyone else's issues are more important or serious than my own. And worse yet, sometimes I feel like I cannot be vulnerable to people online, because I feel like I can't tell anymore who online actually wants to engage with me the person versus the persona I live through online which adds to the weight of my anxieties
The truth is, I haven't been okay for months, and I'm tired of lying to myself that I am okay, I've been hurting ever since I lost both my apartments during COVID and last year and it's been weighing down on my conscience to the point that I've had whole nights I cannot sleep because the memories of losing everything I've been able to build up to being lost overnight keeps replaying in my mind, over and over and over again. The anxiety builds up, the fear of losing everything strikes again, and i start panicking. It has gotten to a point where I have up and broken down badly, several times because the grim reality of where I am now must shine onto me like a spotlight I cannot get rid of.. It's a cycle that's been miserable to deal with. And I'm realizing that I genuinely, desperately need to be able to let out how I feel or else I will spiral into something far worse. I want to be able to make things right with my life again and yet, I drown in nothing but uncertainties and question marks. Will I ever be able to get out of this rut? Will I ever be able to have a place for myself again? Will I ever get that stability I so long for desperately? And despite all this, I feel like I have to mask myself in front of friends, because surely, my issues aren't that bad; it could always be worse, right?
I realize I cannot fix my problems by myself forever, I genuinely need to seek professional help because my anxieties have actively been hurting my life and feeling crippled by the constant thoughts of the past, and of dying, and of the relentless uncertanties really cannot be understated how much that takes a toll on me. But until I get to that point, all I can do now is just get this off my chest to FINALLY have the burden of unbottling my feelings out ease up. Again I am not asking for anyone's sympathy, I just want to be heard and understood. But I know that throughout all this, there's still a light at the end of the tunnel; there's still that strand of optimism that carries me through this and shows me that, it's not over until it's really over. At the end of the day, I sincerely appreciate my closest friends who have been there with me from the start, and most of all my boyfriend, who I genuinely don't know where I would be now if he wasn't there for my darkest moments. Thank you for hearing me out, and I'm sorry that this journal was a bit on the heavy side, but I certainly feel more at ease now that I've been able to type this all out. Love y'all.
- Jeff
In addition, to be as direct as I can, I am not asking for sympathy or advice from others, I realize that my route to self-improvement is 100% my responsibility as much as I appreciate the notion otherwise.
This is a rare instance where I have to take the mask off and be vulnerable for a second, because I've let myself bottle my own feelings for far too long and it's reaching a boiling point and I have nowhere else to turn to offload things. Apologies also if I have not been responding to people online as well, that has been a symptom of my mental state. As many of you are aware (at least to those who still keep up with my twitter account), in September of last year I lost my apartment with my boyfriend after losing my job and being unable to find new work at that point. Things are better now that I've got both a job and a place to live, but the weight of losing a place to live TWICE really starts to take a toll on a person after a while. It's gotten to the point where I feel I have genuinely developed an anxiety disorder and CPTSD from various events which I will not go into detail here that I have had to put up with all my life, and it's deeply affected my commissions and why I still haven't had the chance to be able to clear out my queue, so I deeply apologize for taking so long even now while I am trying my hardest to clear that out with my available time and energy.
It's in this onslaught of anxiety that I'm realizing that I haven't been able to talk to almost anyone about these anxieties, because for as long as I have been alive, I have been forced to internalize my own thoughts and feelings because I was repeatedly told by those around me growing up that, 'Oh, you don't have it as bad as others in the world, you're just being selfish,' which in turn has led into this incredibly self-destructive behavior of not wanting to speak about my personal issues because I have convinced myself that everyone else's issues are more important or serious than my own. And worse yet, sometimes I feel like I cannot be vulnerable to people online, because I feel like I can't tell anymore who online actually wants to engage with me the person versus the persona I live through online which adds to the weight of my anxieties
The truth is, I haven't been okay for months, and I'm tired of lying to myself that I am okay, I've been hurting ever since I lost both my apartments during COVID and last year and it's been weighing down on my conscience to the point that I've had whole nights I cannot sleep because the memories of losing everything I've been able to build up to being lost overnight keeps replaying in my mind, over and over and over again. The anxiety builds up, the fear of losing everything strikes again, and i start panicking. It has gotten to a point where I have up and broken down badly, several times because the grim reality of where I am now must shine onto me like a spotlight I cannot get rid of.. It's a cycle that's been miserable to deal with. And I'm realizing that I genuinely, desperately need to be able to let out how I feel or else I will spiral into something far worse. I want to be able to make things right with my life again and yet, I drown in nothing but uncertainties and question marks. Will I ever be able to get out of this rut? Will I ever be able to have a place for myself again? Will I ever get that stability I so long for desperately? And despite all this, I feel like I have to mask myself in front of friends, because surely, my issues aren't that bad; it could always be worse, right?
I realize I cannot fix my problems by myself forever, I genuinely need to seek professional help because my anxieties have actively been hurting my life and feeling crippled by the constant thoughts of the past, and of dying, and of the relentless uncertanties really cannot be understated how much that takes a toll on me. But until I get to that point, all I can do now is just get this off my chest to FINALLY have the burden of unbottling my feelings out ease up. Again I am not asking for anyone's sympathy, I just want to be heard and understood. But I know that throughout all this, there's still a light at the end of the tunnel; there's still that strand of optimism that carries me through this and shows me that, it's not over until it's really over. At the end of the day, I sincerely appreciate my closest friends who have been there with me from the start, and most of all my boyfriend, who I genuinely don't know where I would be now if he wasn't there for my darkest moments. Thank you for hearing me out, and I'm sorry that this journal was a bit on the heavy side, but I certainly feel more at ease now that I've been able to type this all out. Love y'all.
- Jeff
BUSTIN OUT THE NEW SKETCHBOOK
Posted 4 months agoWell the time has inevitably come where I have finished my last sketchbook and ngl this one in particular is kinda bittersweet to see it be finally used up. I had a lot of fond memories drawing in this sketchbook whether it be for both TFFs I've been to or some of my proudest pieces I've made in it. I'm very happy to have progressed with art as much as I have and want to continue making more stuff I love and that others will also 💙
2025 yearly duck ramblings
Posted 8 months agoit's been a rollercoaster of a year for sure, and even if 2024 kinda ended off on a somewhat bitter note, I continue to be optimistic that the next year will bring better things
there's been a lot I've been struggling with as of late, be it my housing situation, or me feeling like I just don't fit in with certain friend groups, and it's really tough to push through all the negative thoughts but I'm determined to come out on top
throughout all the trials and tribulations this year, one thing's for certain: I'm glad that I have my art and above all else, my bf, who no matter what, we've been able to stick with each other and have each other's backs throughout everything and I couldn't be happier with both to keep giving me a reason to keep pushing
I've also been reflecting where I stand on my social presence, I understand I have this page and my socials and I do post kink art and that's something that has its audience but I feel I have to reiterate that, ultimately, there's more to ME as a person than just what makes me horny or the art I draw, and going into 2025 I want to stress that even if my stuff won't ever be popular or appealing to everyone, the stuff I draw makes me happy, and just getting to do art and constantly refining it is something that brings me joy and I couldn't ask for anything else, and I sincerely appreciate those who have stuck around for my stuff regardless of subject matter
that being said hopefully 2025 brings a ton more art to the table and more wacky duck and lore shenanigans, may your 2025 be a fun and eventful one, quack!
🦆🦆🦆🦆🦆🦆🦆
there's been a lot I've been struggling with as of late, be it my housing situation, or me feeling like I just don't fit in with certain friend groups, and it's really tough to push through all the negative thoughts but I'm determined to come out on top
throughout all the trials and tribulations this year, one thing's for certain: I'm glad that I have my art and above all else, my bf, who no matter what, we've been able to stick with each other and have each other's backs throughout everything and I couldn't be happier with both to keep giving me a reason to keep pushing
I've also been reflecting where I stand on my social presence, I understand I have this page and my socials and I do post kink art and that's something that has its audience but I feel I have to reiterate that, ultimately, there's more to ME as a person than just what makes me horny or the art I draw, and going into 2025 I want to stress that even if my stuff won't ever be popular or appealing to everyone, the stuff I draw makes me happy, and just getting to do art and constantly refining it is something that brings me joy and I couldn't ask for anything else, and I sincerely appreciate those who have stuck around for my stuff regardless of subject matter
that being said hopefully 2025 brings a ton more art to the table and more wacky duck and lore shenanigans, may your 2025 be a fun and eventful one, quack!
🦆🦆🦆🦆🦆🦆🦆
DUCKLIKE IRL UPDATE
Posted a year agoI'm going to be an uncle ðŸ˜ðŸ’™ðŸ˜ðŸ’™ðŸ˜ðŸ’™
DUCKULAR UPDATE
Posted a year agoit ain't that important but I swear I will eventually throw my backlog of art content here lmao
Duck Ramblings about the End of the Year
Posted 2 years agoThe time of me trying this out is currently 4:45am, i've just woken up and have been thinking a LOT about how the past 5 years have panned out.
To say it's been a rollercoaster is REALLY underselling it, because for what it's worth there have been so many highs and lows and bumps in this ride I call my life over these years it's been insane...
And yet despite this rocky ride, despite everything that seems to stand as an obstacle to me moving forward in life, I've come to truly appreciate and respect the furry fandom. This community, the people I've met, the memories I've made with them... I can confidently say without a doubt this community is one of the best things that has ever happened to my life, and I legitimately couldn't be more grateful to have the people I do in my life. This community is the reason I have someone I am with the man I truly love; this community is the reason I've never been more content with my art; and absolutely this community is the reason I've never been more comfortable with my sexuality and just discovering who I am as a person. It's been one heck of a ride sure, but in the eyes of just another person online like me, I'd say the journey has been worth it...
As I peer forward and look into the next couple years of this ride, I tend to think about something my friend talks about a lot... Where are we going to be in these next couple years? What should I be doing and where should I be at? The truth is that my path in life still feels undefined, there's so many variables, even as I inevitably careen into those scary 30s, that to me it's hard to know exactly where I'm going to end up. But one thing's for certain, this community has certainly helped me solidify my passions with my art and what I put out for everyone and myself. It's thanks to the furry community that I've never felt better about the stuff I make; and it's been a genuine passion to be able to just sit and make things, whether it be for myself or those I'm close with.
There's still quite a lot I struggle with, even 5 years on. My ADHD tends to get the better of me, I tend to incessantly worry about how I'm perceived by others, I overthink about my first impressions to people, I'm concerned often times I might be too much to deal with online. But even despite all these things that plague my lil duck brain, I know that I'm always improving, always gettng better with each day and each month and each year. And despite my struggles, I've never been happier to be able to just get to meet people who that I genuinely love to talk to, finding pure joy and catharsis in sharing the same things we love and getting to bond over it. Sure, I may not be the greatest conversationalist out there, but man am I just happy to have been able to get to know those closest to me; and heck, even to those I have just met.
All this squabbling and rambling in this journal, but is there really a point to this whole journal? Maybe? Maybe not. But just thinking about where life takes me is something I can't help but ponder over; and ultimately, I won't know what this rollercoaster has in store for me. But at the very least, what I do know is that I'm genuinely thankful to have found this space where I can be the best me that I can be.
Thank you to every single one of you who have impacted my life being in this community, I wouldn't be where I'm at now if it wasn't for getting to meet ya and interacting with ya.
Lots o' love, and here's to one heck of a 2024,
Static <3
To say it's been a rollercoaster is REALLY underselling it, because for what it's worth there have been so many highs and lows and bumps in this ride I call my life over these years it's been insane...
And yet despite this rocky ride, despite everything that seems to stand as an obstacle to me moving forward in life, I've come to truly appreciate and respect the furry fandom. This community, the people I've met, the memories I've made with them... I can confidently say without a doubt this community is one of the best things that has ever happened to my life, and I legitimately couldn't be more grateful to have the people I do in my life. This community is the reason I have someone I am with the man I truly love; this community is the reason I've never been more content with my art; and absolutely this community is the reason I've never been more comfortable with my sexuality and just discovering who I am as a person. It's been one heck of a ride sure, but in the eyes of just another person online like me, I'd say the journey has been worth it...
As I peer forward and look into the next couple years of this ride, I tend to think about something my friend talks about a lot... Where are we going to be in these next couple years? What should I be doing and where should I be at? The truth is that my path in life still feels undefined, there's so many variables, even as I inevitably careen into those scary 30s, that to me it's hard to know exactly where I'm going to end up. But one thing's for certain, this community has certainly helped me solidify my passions with my art and what I put out for everyone and myself. It's thanks to the furry community that I've never felt better about the stuff I make; and it's been a genuine passion to be able to just sit and make things, whether it be for myself or those I'm close with.
There's still quite a lot I struggle with, even 5 years on. My ADHD tends to get the better of me, I tend to incessantly worry about how I'm perceived by others, I overthink about my first impressions to people, I'm concerned often times I might be too much to deal with online. But even despite all these things that plague my lil duck brain, I know that I'm always improving, always gettng better with each day and each month and each year. And despite my struggles, I've never been happier to be able to just get to meet people who that I genuinely love to talk to, finding pure joy and catharsis in sharing the same things we love and getting to bond over it. Sure, I may not be the greatest conversationalist out there, but man am I just happy to have been able to get to know those closest to me; and heck, even to those I have just met.
All this squabbling and rambling in this journal, but is there really a point to this whole journal? Maybe? Maybe not. But just thinking about where life takes me is something I can't help but ponder over; and ultimately, I won't know what this rollercoaster has in store for me. But at the very least, what I do know is that I'm genuinely thankful to have found this space where I can be the best me that I can be.
Thank you to every single one of you who have impacted my life being in this community, I wouldn't be where I'm at now if it wasn't for getting to meet ya and interacting with ya.
Lots o' love, and here's to one heck of a 2024,
Static <3
DODOVEMBER UPDATE THINGY
Posted 2 years agogood lord I got a lot of requests around for people wanting to be dodofied, but the queue is still up if newcomers still want in on optimal bird action :3 just drop a ref below and I will see what I can do (you must already be a bird is the only requirement)
(again disclaimer that I may not get to everyone's character because of time and energy)
(again disclaimer that I may not get to everyone's character because of time and energy)
DODOVEMBER FOR YOU BIRDS
Posted 2 years agocalling all birdsonas if you wanna be turned into a dodo for this blessed month drop a ref below and I'll see if I can make room for some new dodo themed doodles :3
just as a heads up I probably won't get to every character I see so if you don't show pls don't get personally offended I do have a busy irl and can only make as much time as I can realistically afford
just as a heads up I probably won't get to every character I see so if you don't show pls don't get personally offended I do have a busy irl and can only make as much time as I can realistically afford
DUCK ANNOUNCEMENT
Posted 2 years agoit's official girlies
this ducky is going to TFF 2024 eeeeee I'm so excited y'all have no idea, this is my first ever furcon I will be attending :333
this ducky is going to TFF 2024 eeeeee I'm so excited y'all have no idea, this is my first ever furcon I will be attending :333
Twitter Shenaniganry
Posted 2 years agoaight lemme hear it from y'all, where do you all stand on the absolute state of twitter rn? been hearing a lot about the inevitable death of the site but I'm still sorta skeptical that'll actually be the case, but what do y'all think?
FA rules shit
Posted 2 years agolmao is it still hip and trendy rn to roast that new FA policy that is extremely vague, hypocritical, and doesn't actually solve anything in the long run
Commissions Open!
Posted 2 years agohi I'm opening for comms once more! I've got 4 slots open this time!
taking payments via PayPal or Venmo atm
$25 for sketch, $45 for ink and color, $7 per additional character (3 max), simple BGs only
please DM me at spicystatic1 or via discord (staticj3ff#0937) if you're interested!
taking payments via PayPal or Venmo atm
$25 for sketch, $45 for ink and color, $7 per additional character (3 max), simple BGs only
please DM me at spicystatic1 or via discord (staticj3ff#0937) if you're interested!
Quack
Posted 2 years agoyeah I said it, whatcha gonna do about it bub? 🤨
Mastodon Stuff
Posted 2 years agohttps://blimps.xyz/@staticj3ff
I got a mastodon account that I've been testing out, thanks to the lovely
Ceralor for helping me get a basic understanding of this place, in the event twitter goes through its own internet chernobyl I got a backup place for art lol
I got a mastodon account that I've been testing out, thanks to the lovely
Ceralor for helping me get a basic understanding of this place, in the event twitter goes through its own internet chernobyl I got a backup place for art lolOkay real journal time
Posted 3 years agofigured I should actually try to engage with y'all who do watch me, how's it going? anything ya wanna see from me down the line? idk lol ask me anything (within reason)
Hello
Posted 3 years agoif you read this you're gay got em
telegram shill hours
Posted 4 years agoso I've been using telegram more to talk to ppl, if ever you wanna hmu or anything, my telegram username is staticj3ff, I try to be open to convos with new folk
please don't just send me a "hi" DM, I won't answer those, part of my deal with talking to people is to actually have something to work with conversationally, please do try to keep that in mind and actually have something to talk about lol
p.s. hablo español para ustedes que prefieren hablar español (soy salvadoreño), pero como soy uno de esos americanos feos mi español no es lo mejor, asà que perdoname jaja, me prefiero hablar inglés donde puedo
please don't just send me a "hi" DM, I won't answer those, part of my deal with talking to people is to actually have something to work with conversationally, please do try to keep that in mind and actually have something to talk about lol
p.s. hablo español para ustedes que prefieren hablar español (soy salvadoreño), pero como soy uno de esos americanos feos mi español no es lo mejor, asà que perdoname jaja, me prefiero hablar inglés donde puedo
lmao first journal
Posted 4 years agoit is I the one and only STATIC
figured I'd make a brief journal introducing myself a little, the name's static or jeff, idk call me either lol. been doing art for a while now, I typically do exclusively traditional namely because I'm too lazy to bother with digital, and either way I have far more enjoyment making trad art than with my digital endeavors
I've been actively trying to use FA a lot more to post my artwork, and I appreciate the watches I've gotten already, it means a lot that people like my art
just be aware my content will probably be all over the place, I got my art for my specific audiences, but round's the name of the game, and also character design stuff when I don't focus on round
my notes and DMs are typically open, feel free to talk tho I may be busy at times so apologies if I don't respond right away, lol I've gotten a lot better at actually being able to talk to people, doing comms and being around the community has definitely helped in that regard
I am also open for commissions, my preferred method of contact is discord, tho I do also use telegram as well (mostly only as a backup for when I cannot use discord), please don't hesitate to ask for comm prices because I need to update my comm sheet anyway. trades I'm very iffy on, I will typically only accept them from people I know and/or trust, no requests at all, I will not respond to any request (unless of course you are a homie and/or boyfriend who has free VIP art pass)
thanks again for the support y'all, I'm very excited to show off some of the art that I make here on this platform 💙
much love, static
figured I'd make a brief journal introducing myself a little, the name's static or jeff, idk call me either lol. been doing art for a while now, I typically do exclusively traditional namely because I'm too lazy to bother with digital, and either way I have far more enjoyment making trad art than with my digital endeavors
I've been actively trying to use FA a lot more to post my artwork, and I appreciate the watches I've gotten already, it means a lot that people like my art
just be aware my content will probably be all over the place, I got my art for my specific audiences, but round's the name of the game, and also character design stuff when I don't focus on round
my notes and DMs are typically open, feel free to talk tho I may be busy at times so apologies if I don't respond right away, lol I've gotten a lot better at actually being able to talk to people, doing comms and being around the community has definitely helped in that regard
I am also open for commissions, my preferred method of contact is discord, tho I do also use telegram as well (mostly only as a backup for when I cannot use discord), please don't hesitate to ask for comm prices because I need to update my comm sheet anyway. trades I'm very iffy on, I will typically only accept them from people I know and/or trust, no requests at all, I will not respond to any request (unless of course you are a homie and/or boyfriend who has free VIP art pass)
thanks again for the support y'all, I'm very excited to show off some of the art that I make here on this platform 💙
much love, static
