One week until my birthday. Not sure what, if anything, I'm going to do. Probably just talk to my friends and whatnot. Either way I think I'm looking forward to the PC release of Dark Souls 2 more than I am my birthday, hah

That time of year again. I hope everyone has been enjoying their holidays, and that you all have a Merry Christmas and Happy New Year. I hope that everyone can find something they wish for over the next year and for that something to bring them hapiness

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=w-xOO4qNWUs

Hope every one is having/had a good day, and hope every one has a happy new year as well

I'm kind of tired of people making me feel like I have to apologize for the way they treat me.
Maybe I just want friends who accept me for me instead of making me feel like I have to change to make them want to be my friend.
Maybe I just want some one to put up with my shit.
Maybe I just want some one to love me too.

Wondering why it seems like every time some one says they like me and I kind of like them back that when I try to talk to them more they become too busy.
Then I find out, by chance, that they're now in a relationship with some one else

So I just got home a little bit ago, kind of tired but I had a good time, bought some stuff to bring home, and found out that I could walk around a lot more than I thought I could. I should have the pictures from my friends tomorrow and I will probably put some up then

I hope that everyone is having a good day and that you have friends or family out there that are thinking of you today

I don't really expect many people to read this, just putting it up for my friends that are on here that might.

I know the day is almost over here on the east coast but I was up real late last night and only got a few hours sleep before getting busy with the stuff for the day lol, lame excuse but there it is.

So Merry Christmas and hope everyone had/has a good day

Just thought I'd say hi and let everyone know I'm still here.
I'm still working on stuff, I just havent finished any of it yet.
I'm also trying to get a guitar, I started to learn some years back but some things happened between me and the person teaching me that caused me to stay away from it for awhile but now I want to learn again so I'm looking forward to that.
I guess I should go make some more fractals now since thats what people watch me for rather than my random journals, lol

A comic I read on a regular basis posted a rather funny strip that I thought I'd share, and it doesnt require any knowledge of backstory to get the joke http://www.lfgcomic.com/page/374

1. Be my friend?
2. Date me?
3. Love me?
4. Be there for me when I need someone the most?
5. Be my crying shoulder?
6. Tell me when I'm wrong and not be afraid to hurt my feelings?
7. Be honest with me?
8. Lift me up when I fall?
9. Sleep in the same bed as me?
10. Talk to me when I'm lonely?
11. Make me smile and tell me everything will be okay?
12. Accept me for who I am?
13. Are you being %100 honest with these questions?
14. Are you going to re-post this so I can answer?

Reposting for a friend

Some one I once knew said that Insanity could be described by doing the same thing over and over again and expecting a different result each time. By that definition I must be insane, because you would think that after all the times that I've tried to make friends and help others failed, that I would have quit by now.

But I'm still trying...


I'm not looking for sympathy or anything like that, just making an observation, so you can keep any thoughts about my 'sympathy mongering' to yourself

It was yesterday... I made a journal but I assume that since I didnt have "birthday" in the title, it got ignored and/or deleted, so if anyone wants to say something, here's your belated chance

Yep, its my birthday. My brother said "congrats, you've survived another year", but then he also said he wont miss next time either, so we'll see if I'll make it to the next one or not. >_>

Its really freakin cold... We've been without power for 3 days, in an area in southern PA, it has been really frelling cold... I barely slept the last couple days and I REALLY hope that the next storm coming up doesnt take out our power again x_x

So yea.... I know I've been a bit lazy about putting stuff up for quite a while, and I decided to make some stuff to put up, and what did I find?, that FA was down, so I couldnt put any of my stuff up.... Then I get a computer virus and have to reformat, and somehow durring the hour or so that it took me to get windows reinstalled and whatnot, my backup disk got corrupted and I lost some of the stuff on it, good times, so I guess I'm back at square one. Will try to make some new stuff to put up, tho I really liked the stuff I'd made before -_-

Yea.... so the Power Supply died on my PC, and I just got the new one today... so after about a week of not having my computer I'm back, YAY!

I just want to curl up somewhere and forget everything and never have to deal with anything ever again, no matter what I do to try and be happy it backfires, its just not worth it, I'm going to go fucking crazy at this point. Its just not worth it anymore, all I want out of my life is to find some one and be happy, so why does it have to be so fucking hard...... I just dont fucking care anymore

Well, I guess what I want to say is I'm sorry, to everyone who's probly been expecting me to have alot more fractals coming more often. My life has been a huge spiral of events lately which only now seems to be settling, hopefully for the best, and I hope to be putting more fractals up again soon (still having computer problems too, which means I'll be making them on my main computer instead of my work computer >_<)

Even tho I'm sure only one person might fill this out, I figured I'd put it up here for them anyway >_>

1. Your Name:
2. Age:
3. Single or Taken:
4. Favourite Film:
5. Favourite Song or Album:
6. Favourite Band/Artist:
7. Dirty or Clean:
8. Tattoos and/or Piercings:
9. Do we know each other outside of FA?:
10. What's your philosophy on life?:
11. Is the bottle half-full or half-empty?:
12. Would you keep a secret from me if you thought it was in my best interest?:
13. What is your favourite memory of us?:
14. What is your favourite guilty pleasure?:
15. Tell me one odd/interesting fact about you:
16. You can have three wishes (for yourself, so forget all the 'world peace etc' malarkey) - what are they?:
17. Can we get together and make a cake?:
18. Which country is your spiritual home?:
19. What is your big weakness?:
20. Do you think I'm a good person?:
21. What was your best/favourite subject at school?:
22. Describe your accent:
23. If you could change anything about me, would you?:
24. What do you wear to sleep?:
25. Trousers or skirts?:
26. Cigarettes or alcohol?:
27. If I only had one day to live, what would we do together? (If you have no idea, just say something crazy, it'll entertain me!):
28. Will you repost this so I can fill it out for you? :

Taken from  Booyakasha011 so I could get my latest "poor me" journal off the top

[x] You know how to make a pot of coffee.
[ ] You keep track of dates using a calendar.
[ ] You own a credit card.
[x] You know how to change the oil in a car.
[x] You've done your own laundry.
[x] You can vote in an election.
[x] You can cook for yourself.
[ ] You think politics are interesting.
TOTAL SO FAR: 5

[ ] You show up for school late a lot.
[ ] You always carry a pen/pencil in your bag/purse/pocket.
[x] You've never gotten a detention.
[ ] You have forgotten your own birthday.
[x] You like to take walks by yourself.
[x] You know what credibility means, without looking it up.
[x] You drink caffeine at least once a week.
TOTAL SO FAR: 9

[x] You know how to do the dishes.
[x] You can count to 10 in another language.
[ ] When you say you're going to do something you usually do it.
[x] You can mow the lawn.
[x] You study even when you don't have to.
[x] You have hand-washed a car before.
TOTAL SO FAR: 14

[x] You can spell experience, without looking it up.
[ ] The people at Starbucks know you by name.
[x] Your favorite kind of food is take out.
[x] You can go to the store without getting something you don't need.
[x] You understand political jokes the first time they are said.
[x] You can type pretty quick.
TOTAL SO FAR: 19

[ ] Your only friends are from your place of employment.
[ ] You have been to a Tupperware party.
[x] You have realized that practically no one will take you seriously unless you are over the age of 25 and have a job.
[ ] You have more bills than you can pay.
[x] You have been to the beach.
[x] You use the internet every day.
[x] You have been outside of your own country 3 or more times.
[ ] You make your bed in the morning.
Total: 23

Go figure, I'm 22, but this says I'm 23, one year closer to death, GO ME!

Some times I wonder if its worth living, no, I dont want to kill myself or anything like that, I just want to go to sleep and not have to wake up

(Just venting some shit again, heh)

Depending on if my DVD drive decides to start working again or not, I might have to go back to doing fractals on my main computer, which means not being able to do anything for hours at a time while waiting for renders again, yay

Why is it that no matter what I do somehow I'm doing something wrong, or I'm wrong for not doing something that has nothing to do with whats going on

Why is it that even when I'm trying to do something nice I'm wrong for something, even if its not related...

I fucking hate it