its not working. just not working.

the only solutions I've been able to find are things that go in and actually fix coding in the programming, and I don't understand any of that shit.

SO, I'm a bit fucked.

ShadowsLamb

go follow me c:

I will post tiddly bits now and again I think

long story short my beautiful new tablet arrived

but my computer thusfar refuses to install it properly.

tomorrow I actually have my first day off in a long while, I'll be working on fixing it then, but today I'm just kinda stuck here staring at it's flawless surface.

it's a bit bigger than aressa's tablet, but smaller than my genius one. now I gotta adjust to the size again lol.

Idk how to get this thing installed, I may have to get some help figuring it out. according to most sites I have to have all other tablet programs uninstalled and completely removed because idk th tablet gets jealous or something and is like "no I won't be a housebreaker" but I'm like "please come on we broke up a long time ago he just forgot his things"

lkjAFLKflkjsghas

so yeah uh if anyone knows how to properly install a huion 580 properly please help, because I can't even get it installed enough for me to get the settings menu, it just becomes another mouse.

for those of you who want a tablet but can't afford wacom, HERE YA GO

http://www.amazon.com/gp/product/B0.....UTF8&psc=1

this thing is $50(black is cheaper than white), and has TWICE the pressure levels of most bamboo tablets. I just bought one, along with a pack of spare nibs/pen holder thing

I'll have it by next saturday. so Ill be starting up commissions then!

she's gone

tomorrow Aressa leaves for texas to live with her new girlfriend. and with her goes the tablet.

we're still good friends don't nobody worry about that.

but this means even though I do need to do commissions to help pay bills, now that she's finally leaving, I can't, because I have no tablet. I'm shading the last commission tonight(I'm so sorry I kept forgetting) and then that's it, I can't draw anymore, other than some doodles I plan getting out of my system now.

hopefully I can get new one around christmas

I'm working today from open to close. I go in at 9(or rather, when I get picked up) and I don't leave until after 9pm.

no, I'm not actually WORKING those 12 hours. I get a 4 hour break at 1pm, but I can't come home because aressa has work then. so I'm bringing my computer and working on commissions at work during that time

I will be working on  birdofblack's pony commission, nothing else, because it's the only one rated G lol.

oop, ride on the way, just texted

this past week was hard for me at first. I had all the time in the world to work on commissions, and I'm sorry I didn't.

Aressa had gone away for the week with her new girlfriend and I was feeling down and jealous and shit.

well I joined FetLife. if you don't know what it is, it's basically like FA, only for fetishes NOT INCLUDING furries. BDSM, Gorean, weird shit with HUMANS.

I posted an ad in one of their classified groups, stating my interest but inexperience in being a submissive.

well now I have a boyfriend who is perfect.

I don't wanna sound like a dick, but I'v made more connections with him than I did with Aressa.

he was the only person to respond to my ad in detail about himself, unlike the freaking 500 messages saying stuff like "sup sexy I'm interested".
his reply was longer than my ad.

well long story short, I ain't single, and he's a hell of a cutie and he's into everything I'm into and he's not into extreme fetishes so it's a very safe long distance relationship.

I used to work at Top That pizza which is like subway but for personal sized pizzas

the boss their took me back, no need for an app or resume or nothing.

today was fan-FUCKING-TASTIC.

I WAS SO PUMPED TO WORK

THIS JOB IS A MILLION TIMES EASIER THAN MY OLD ONE.

less pay and less hours

BUT I CAN REPLACE ANYONE WHO CALLS IN AND THAT apparently has been happening a lot.

SO YEAH I GOT REHIRED TODAY AND 3 HOURS LATER I GOT CALLED IN IT WAS AWESOME.

and familiar faces still work there too, so I don't even have to really learn many names.

its awesome

but I still gotta do commissions to make up for the money I'm not making

so tomorrow after my shift I'll be working on the commissions I got.

1:  wolfpack67
>shaded, 2 char, ADULT
status: INKING

2: SeyferBlack(IMVU)
>shaded, 1 char, MATURE
status: need to finish sketching

3:  BirdofBlack
>pony, BG, GEN
status: SKETCHED

a lot has happened in the past week, that made me forget about commissions

for one thing, I got called for an interview at raising canes, a chicken place right next door to where my old job was. the interview went fantastic, and I'mm supposed to find out today if they want me for the job, which I'm pretty sure they will.

then I actually got started on cleaning the house. I may not have gotten far but the place looks way better already

my mom ordered me a bike for transport, it should be here tomorrowish.

and then my really nice neighbor suprised me by telling me she want to GIVE ME HER VAN because she got a car from the car donation list like 2 weeks after getting the van herself, and all I have to pay for is the title transfer because thats all she had to pay for.

also I admit, IMVU swallowed me for a few days.

BUT IM WORKING ON COMMISSIONS NOW.

a lot has happened in the past week, that made me forget about commissions

for one thing, I got called for an interview at raising canes, a chicken place right next door to where my old job was. the interview went fantastic, and I'mm supposed to find out today if they want me for the job, which I'm pretty sure they will.

then I actually got started on cleaning the house. I may not have gotten far but the place looks way better already

my mom ordered me a bike for transport, it should be here tomorrowish.

and then my really nice neighbor suprised me by telling me she want to GIVE ME HER VAN because she got a car from the car donation list like 2 weeks after getting the van herself, and all I have to pay for is the title transfer because thats all she had to pay for.

also I admit, IMVU swallowed me for a few days.

BUT IM WORKING ON COMMISSIONS NOW.

because I realized that ending it after only 2 days would mean I would have a shit ton of art to do at once.

so yeah I'm gonna put that off, see if the bid goes higher, and work on the other two commissions I have.

finally managed to get my unemployment claim through...but it's gonna take a month before I even start seeing money, if I even qualify, which is shitty.

ugh, well, time to get to work

I've been attempting to file for unemployment literally all day.
ugh this website is shitty.

I'm gonna have to bite through my phone anxiety and actually contact the employment agency or whatever

fucking bites man

commissions will be worked on as soon as I finish this. if I ever fucking do, stupid ass government websites AUG.

PLEASE READ MY PRICE SHEET BEFORE SENDING NOTES

===> http://www.furaffinity.net/view/11625373/ <===

SLOTS:

1:  wolfpack67

2: SeyferBlack (some guy on IMVU wow)

3:

WILL DRAW ANYTHING AND EVERYTHING NO MATTER WHAT, AS LONG AS YOU PAY THE FULL PRICE.

ANY DISCOUNTS I'VE GIVEN IN THE PAST ARE NO LONGER BEING USED I'M SORRY.

because I got fired today.

I don't want to go into details about it, I'd really rather not, but to make a long story short, when I finally made a mental change to stop letting things bother me at work, corporate people show up and my manager, who becomes the devil when they are around, fired me for a shitty reason, and because corporate was there, I can't even try to go above her and fight it, because they don't care. the whole business is fucking corrupted. my supervisor tried to talk her out of it but she didn't care.

do not ask me for more, I do NOT want to talk about it.

but here's the deal. I got october rent and bills taken care of. I have a month before I have to pay for this shit again. I just renewed my lease like 3 months ago for a full year, I can't back our of my contract or I'm going to go into debt. I need to make about $700 a month in order to survive. of course that is if I plan on paying for everything myself, Aressa will help of course, but she barely makes half as much as I did.

so while I search for another job, I will be doing commissions to help out.

PRICES ARE GOING UP. because this is an emergency, and I have to live off it for a while.

DONATIONS WILL GLADLY BE ACCEPTED. I'm not in florida anymore, if I get evicted I'm homeless. so any penny you can spare will help me survive.

I will be working on getting the tablet functioning. my old one is dead but I know I had finally figured out how to get Aressa's tablet working on my computer. once I get it functioning I will work on a sample image to be an ad.

so keep an eye out. I will be working on this today, and will open soon after.

I just kinda stopped coming here cuz of reasons, being
> my tablet died
> couldn't get aressa's tablet to work
>DID get it to work, but no pressure
>fixed pressure, but too overworked to want to draw
>no drawing=no uploading= no point?


so uh
er
I'm still working that lame job, still no car, still no promotion, still same bullshit

also I joined an Impressive Title server, namely Royal Skies.

there's not much else to say, but hi.

I am NOT getting promoted.
at least not to food service manager at another store that I don't want to go to

instead, I'm being promoted to basically a "shift lead" position at the store I'm already at, still being trained as a manager. this way when a new store opens in the future, towards the end of this year, I'll already know what I'm doing, and starting in a new store, I can make sure everything is organized how I want/am used to right from the start without confusing employees with a sudden change to what they've gotten used to.

which means even if I still rush to get a car, I don't have to drive it right away. I can buy it and just keep it parked while I shop for insurance.

and I still get a higher pay, just not as high as an actual food service manager would. let's say FSM gets paid like idk $13.50 an hour, I'm at $9 an hour now, so maybe I'll be $10.75 an hour, idk. I'll find out when my pay increases in the next two weeks. the district manager guy is on vacation so we can't do anything official yet.

but this is EXTREMELY good news. Since I had decided that I'm in no rush to get the promotion, as long as I'm steady on, this is the absolute best alternative. I get the training and experience I need without being pressured on time, I still get a higher pay, I still get close to what I've been wanting, and I'm still at my favorite store.

nothing could be better right now.

I START MANAGEMENT TRAINING TODAY.

I AM NOT PREPARED FOR THIS

http://25.media.tumblr.com/b7cc4916.....u1vyo1_250.gif

LEO BE MY GUIDE SHOW ME HOW TO BE A LEADER FNSDGSADF


//I really really like turtles mmkay//

cuz I could be promoted in the next week. O_O;

cuz some idiot at another store decided to no call no show and lost their management position.

I'm bot excided and kinda....not excited. that store in question is much smaller than what I'm used to, and it's really dirty and the workers are kinda slobs but at the same time their sales are like 78165923865 times what we're making

$1 slice wednesdays, we have to make 29 pizzas for that.

they make 100+

but the kitchen is incredibly tiny.

and they have a gross oil fryer instead of the no-oil fryer we have, so I'll end up coming home smelling like mcdonalds. that shit don't get out of your clothes.

uuuugh but the pay is like $13 an hourrrrr

but I don't have a car yet

but I've been wanting this promotion and been fighting for it forever

but this store is shit


UUUUUGH

also birthday was awesome, I sat around and did nothing and had a nice red lobster dinner last night UoU late bday thing at my request and it was nummy~ thank you all for your birthday wishes. <3

last night we had a tornado warning/sighting.

right now we're under another tornado warning, the wind is slowly picking up

this week is my birthday, and I asked for off, but in order for me to have the wednesday off-the busiest day of the week- I have to work a fucking double on tuesday- the OTHER busiest day of the week.

I told my boss she could just give me the weekend off, I wouldn't complain, and it would be easier for both of us, but she did this instead.

now instead of going to the animal sanctuary to feed rescued lemurs gummy snacks, I'll be in bed recovering from a forced double and lack of sleep. cuz I don't even have the day before off from work. I'm going to have a total of 7 hours between clocking out and clocking in on tuesday.

BULLSHIT.

also, I only have sunday off on the weekend. I can't go to club Majestic on a fucking sunday night.

UGH.

birthweek SUCKS this year. it's gonna be just like an other week, nothing special about it, except presents from aressa and her mom. (but her mom doesn't know me as well as she thinks so her presents are usually ugh like make up.)

MAYBE a nice dinner if I'm lucky and can even feel my legs, or if my bad ankle isn't screaming at me.



some good news though, apparently I'm still under mom's insurance and can remain there till I'm 26? now all I need is a new card so I can actually take advantage of that. would have been nice to know when I first fucked up my ankle or when I fucked up my shoulder. yeaaah woulda been nice to know.



oh also oklahoma is humid as SHIT.

if only my webcam worked...
she's crying and laughing at everything and ranting about everything.

she can't handle life right now it's so funny.

I really hope she doesn't drown in the pasta I made her.

#designated drunken-sitter

for whatever reason, the SAI version I have, that Aressa copied from her computer and gave directly to me, ended up becoming a trial version through transfer(wtf) and tha "Trial" ended. I can still draw just fine, but I can't save ANYTHING.

thank god I wasn't drawing something too important, I could just screenshot it and save through mspaint, but GODDAMN

so I'm on the hunt for a proper SAI download link. got a few to try out right now, hopefully one will work without blowing up my laptop

I'm in the process of working my butt off to get a car. yes, money from commissions helps, but I just can't focus on drawing when I'm tired and stressed from work. I only get 2 days off a week now, someone quit after finding another job, so my hours are picking up. I need to look for a car every day online, I can't get the promotion I need unless I have one, which is retarded, because if I had the promotion, I technically wouldn't need a car till after summer when our new stores open up.

I need the job to pay for the car, but I need the car to get the job.
I hate life circles like that.

but yeah, I just can't right now. I barely draw at all anymore because I'm working so hard, then I get home and just want to relax. and on those days off I'm doing chores and laundry and food shopping, so I don't have time.

no one has paid me for their sketches. no one waiting has paid me either. so in that sense I owe no one anything. that's really the only reason I'm even able to cancel, otherwise I'd be forcing myself to spit out half assed work in order to get it off my chest.

I'm sure you guys are thinking "haha nice one Ichi April fools!" but no

this isn't a prank, I'm really making this decision. I had been thinking about it for a while and had mentioned earlier I might cancel. well now I am.

unfortunately, I have a real life now, and responsibilities and bills and such that I need to take care of. I don't have time for drawing furry porn etc.

not to mention I'm like...growing out of it? IDK I don't get the same joy I used to from drawing animal dicks and such. its just a hassle now.


I'm focusing on my future for real for the first time. I know what I wanna do with my life and I know how I'm going to get it. it's just a matter of priorities.

Will I still do art? of course. just not the commissions I've taken it's too hard for me to just go back to them before I moved in with Aressa, drawing non-stop every day was easy, I had a shitty job and it was my only source of income. but now my life is in order. I have no debt and I have a promotion with my name on it, an increased paycheck, and only a year or so afterwards I can get the house of my dreams, and over time I can slowly start my mini-ranch and live the life I wanted.

I have my priorities in order. I don't need to draw for money anymore.

but I do still get the urges to draw. and when I do, I will probably do a stream for donation or something, or not, I might just start doing simple free requests, or YCHs like Aressa is doing(she has more free time than me).

I think it's just going to be easier if I make the decisions for a while.

I've always sacrificed what I wanted and given to everyone else. for once I can see what I want and it's in my reach, so I'm going to focus on me.

I hope no one is mad at me for this. but let me put it this way.

if your dream was right in front of you, what would you pick? drawing porn for money, or that dream?


I doubt anyone would pick drawing porn in my situation.


(I only say drawing porn as a general term, I know not all of my commissions are porn, don't get all huffy)

Saving up to buy a car, so my baby is holding an auction to help pay for it! It's kinda vore related, just so you know.

http://www.furaffinity.net/view/10260074/