Well it's my birthday today and im turning 21 (or maybe im turning 4 who knows? :P ). Not a clue what im gonna do today but I'm sure I can find something fun to do. My brother got me an absolutely amazing birthday cake with the Stormwind lion crest on it from World of Warcraft and I go so happy when I saw it. Anyway I hope that everyone is gonna have a good day today ^-^

I was having some issues with twitch so im over at youtube streaming now

https://gaming.youtube.com/user/dolk1/live

Hey im streaming live over at twitch.tv/dolk1

feel free to drop by and say hello ^-^

So today I began my first day at the gym. I was going to start last week but I never got my money so I could pay for it so I had to start this week instead. For the time being im gonna be going to the gym 3 times a week and later down the line when I can im gonna go everyday.

So just alittle sneak peak at how I did today.

Goal
My goal is still to lose weight but ive settled for around 25-30kg I should lose (still wanna do the 40 if I can)

Monday

Distance
Around 5km

Duration
1:00:41h

Calories
302

That is just a small little sneak peak on how I did today. I'll be updating with the full weekly results every monday.

Fitness and health tips are always very much welcome

So recently I've been doing some thinking about the whole cubfur/Caretaker dynamic thing. And I've always considered myself to first and foremost being a cub which I still agree with mostly. However thoughts and feelings about wanting to try to be a caretaker has started to enter my mind. I always wanted a caretaker for my cub side but ive been thinking that maybe I could substitute that with being a caretaker myself. So yeah ive been thinking about it and it sounds like it could possibly be alot of fun. So I think I identify as firstly a cub/littlefur and secondly as a caretaker.

Health & Exercise Journal #1

So it seems like excercise and being healthy is all the rage now so I thought I might aswell try it.
Well okay the real reason im doing it is because I have a really bad self-image which effects my selfesteem so I wanna try to lose weight.
In this first journal I will write down some basic information about my current situation and such in hopes that you kind furs on FA might give me help or advice in how to accomplish my goal.

Current Weight
My current weight is 118.6 Kg (261 lbs)

Goal
My weight goal is between 70-75kg (154-165 lbs)

Current Exercises
I have started out with some regular walking to try to ease myself into it.

Daily Results
Since I just started today there will only be one day of results
Distance 6.05Km (3 miles)

Duration 1:03:49h

Calories 405

Week Total 405

[Misc. Info[/b]
I am suffering from bad metabolism due to Hashimoto's thyroiditis ( https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Hashimoto's_thyroiditis )
due to this weight loss might be alot harder than for the average person.

I am currently considering joining a gym in hopes that it will make exercise easier for me.

Things I use
Some of the things I currently use for exercise is
* Phone & Headphones


Now for some simple questions I would like to have answered so if you know the answer please let me know.

How important is the food I eat to my chance of losing weight?

How much soda can I drink per week?

Energy drinks yes or no?

Are there any things you can think of that could be useful when exercising?


Thanks alot for reading this far into my journal I promise that they will be alot shorter in the future (hopefully)
I will post a update journal every monday.

And lastly I would like to thank  Yookey for giving me the encouragement to start exercising by reading her exercise journals.

I don't really know whats been going on with me recently. I nearly never sleep anymore. I am always bored wanting something to do. I havent felt like ive had fun once since I went to NFC. Sure I've heard of post-con blues but you'd think it would have passed. I feel so ignored all the time. I haven't talked to anyone verbaly in like a month or two who hasn't been my parents and brother or medical staff. No friends seems to talk to me anymore and I just feel so ignored. I keep reading on twitter and facebook people I consider friends having fun and it just seems like everyone seems to forget about me. No one ever seems to think of me when they wanna do something. Maybe its just my brain screwing with me but it feels really bad. Maybe its just that those people dont want anything to do with me. The only times i've left my house recently has been to go shopping or to go to the hospital. 95% of my time I spend within the four walls of my room which has become more of a prison than a sanctuary. I feel like if im going insane. Always tiered but can never sleep. Always bored with nothing to do. Anxiety making me scared that ive pushed away every person id ever considered a friend.

Oh well now im rambeling so im going to end this journal now. Anyway long story short Im a loser that nobody cares about and it'd be better if people just forgot about me.

None of the people I consider friends talk to me anymore it seems like. I try and try and try to talk to them get to do something with them but to no use. In the last 2 months the only people I have spoken to have been my family and medical staff no one else. No one else wants to speak to me it seems like. I get it im a burden to them I guess. Fine if they wanna feel like that but I would much rather they said like "hey your not my friend" and just told me instead of letting me try so hard on someone that apparently doesnt like me or even hates me. I dunno why it seems to be like this. On the bright side if I keep going like ive done the last 2 months I wont be a burden to those people anymore. I'll just keep hidden away in my room only leaving for dinner and doctors visits. Thats the story of my life it seems. Unwanted, hated and despised.

However on another bright side my meds got changed to 3 pills aday the limit of what you can take without risking an overdose that could be potentially lethal. Hurray for that and that also means if that doesnt help then I must be really fucked.

Long story short: Everyone hates me and I hate me too so awesome ^^

I don't know why I have been feeling this way but ever since after NFC I just can't seem to have fun anymore. I pretty much spend most of my days just sitting in my room playing videogames. Videogames are supposed to be a form of entertainment yet now adays I pretty much just play them to pass the time. I don't seem to get any joy out of playing them anymore it's just to waste time. I can't really do anything else than play games either. Nothing seems to be going on here where I live and all of the friends I used to have are either working all the time or they don't live nearby anymore. Even my brother pretty much works around the clock now which means I can't talk to him either. I don't really know what to do.

So I went out fishing today for the first time in years. My brother and a friend off ours usually go out fishing very often and they decided to ask if I wanted to join them today. I thought its nice and sunny weather outside so why not? we set off at around 3 in the afternoon with all the fishing equipment aswell as the boat. We got to the docks and managed to get the boat into the water with no issues whatsoever and off we went out on the waters in our boat to fish. I spent the first 2 hours just tanning while my brother and friend was fishing. After 2 hours we had gotten no fish at all so we kept on moving to different places with the boat. After yet another 2 hours we had gotten no fish again. We decided to go to a nearby beach that led to a forest so that we could get a bathroom break. While docking the boat my brother managed to get stuck with one foot on the boat and one foot on land as the boat was drifting of a bit which meant he bascially did a split. Me and Joakim (our friend) nearly died from laughter. When my brother was done and returned to the boat he managed to slip on the rocks and fell into the water between the beach and boat injuring himself pretty seriously. After checking on him and saying that we could go back to the dock and see that he hadn't broken anything he told us he wanted to continue. While pulling up the anchor Joakim managed to drop it on his foot and then managed to hit himself between the legs with it. And while all that was going on I myself managed to get a fish hook stuck in my arm. After many injuries and alot of swearing and time we managed to get out on the lake again. Time passed until it was about 9 O'clock in the evening when we finally gave up. Defeated we went back to the dock with no fish at all and everyone having been injured in one way or another.

So the moral of the story is never put three idiots in a boat and give them the idea to go out fishing or all of them may returned bruised and injured.

Despite all the things it was the most fun ive had in a while ^_^

Hey Im streaming over at Twitch.tv/dolk1 currently I am streaming Team Fortress 2 but I might change games now and then so feel free to stop by and say hi ^_^

So I was home alone for a bit today and decided that I felt like I deserved being in little mode for a bit. So I got padded, put on my onesie and got out my pacifier and my pinkie pie plushie and decided to watch cartoons. This was one of the time when I got really deep into little space. I just sat around sucking my paci and hugging my plushie while watching these cartoons. I was watching the amazing world of gumball when something weird happend. There was a scene in the episode where one of the characters called Alan (who is a talking balloon) is doing the ice-bucket challange only to find out that the bucket is just filled with a block of ice that is dropped on him which causes him to pop and Gumball and darwin keep repeating the scene over and over. And the weird thing was that in my little headspace I got scared. See when I grew up I had an irrational phobia of balloons. I always thought that they were terrifying and now that I was in little headspace and saw this scene of a balloon getting popped I got scared. My first reaction to this was to hug my Pinkie plushie and kinda hide my face behind it. And this I found very interesting. Because it showed me something that I didnt know about myself. I noticed that when I am in little mode im alot more vulnerable than I usually am otherwise. Which just kinda felt amazing due to the fact that I used to have a hard time getting into proper little mode and staying in it. I found this experience very interesting and I would love to hear what people think about it. Do you guys get similar feelings and experiences while in little mode?

So I finally went to see Zootopia yesterday. I had been putting it off for a while even though I really wanted to see it. I'm gonna keep this post really short as I'm scared I'll end up spoiling the movie otherwise and I know how annoying that can be as I tried to avoid all spoilers before I watched the movie (which was impossible). Anyway all im gonna say about the movie at this time is that it is 100% my new favorite movie. I really thought that it would have been over hyped but that was not the case. Anyway it's absolutely my new favorite movie and Im gonna watch it many more times when it comes out on dvd or such ^_^

I don't know what's wrong with me lately. The last few weeks I have been feeling so tiered all the time. It doesn't matter how much sleep I get I still feel tiered. For example I can go to sleep at 19:00 and sleep until 12:00 and I'm still at the point where I can barely keep awake. And the few times that I feel like I am somewhat awake it only lasts as long as I have something to do. Basically as long as I can distract myself I feel somewhat awake. But as soon as I start to get bored again I start to fall asleep. It's really weird and I don't know what to do about it. I also seem to have lost alot of my energy for doing things. I can sit down and want to play games and then maybe play and have fun for like 15 min and then I'll get bored again and I'll get back to being sleepy. I dunno why I got this way or how to fix it.

So today seems to be one of "those" days again. One of the days where I can't seem to be happy no matter how hard I try. Alot of things just seems to annoy me. So last night I didn't manage to fall asleep until 7.30 this morning. At 12:00 I was woken up by my brother who comes in and says "you better wake up its 2 o'clock" which made me jump out of bed only to discover it was acutally only 12. This was a minor annoyance so I sat and checked my twitter and facebook. And the only things I see are stupid game invites and such on facebook. So I thought i'd log onto my cub twitter because usually I see alot of happy things on there and that was kinda what I needed at the moment. Wrong again the first thing I see is one of the cub accounts im following having posted a crap ton of tweets about american politics and how horrible people are for agreeing with X or Y person (and no it wasn't Trump they were talking about). So as it's the 1st of the month I had to send in paper to the work center and social welfare to get my money for this month. And my printer wasn't working...So grumpily I had to walk downstairs and use my mothers computer to print out the papers I needed. My mother then proceeded to tell me in the exact order I had to put the papers before stapeling them together which just made me even more grumpier than I already was. So with all of that done I set off to the social welfare office to turn in my paper work. I get there and there are two people before my turn (which usually is just a minor inconvinience but now felt like a huge annoyance)

So one of the people before me gets their turn and she walks up to the desk and starts talking. She is talking really loudly so I can hear what she is saying even though im on the other side of the room. And what she says just makes me really mad. So she starts by asking why she isn't getting 15.000 SEK a month anymore and the lady working there answers that its because she has an income of 19.000 SEK a month aswell as Child support and housing allowance. And she proceeds to respond that it isn't fair that she is only getting 5000 SEK in social welfare now because of it. And my first thought is "Not Fair??" how is that not fair if she also has an income of 19.000 a month? And she is getting 5000 from social welfare aswell. I get barely 3000 a month and I have to pay rent aswell as my phone bill and survive on what remains. Is that fair? NO. So I was really close to telling her that. But I managed to keep silent.

And after a long time she leaves very angry at the fact that she isn't getting more money than most other social welfare people now.

And just before its my turn a girl my age walks into the office and cuts to the front of the queu and says she has to talk to someone that works there. And the lady working there asks for ID so that they can confirm who she says she is before seeing if the person she needed to talk to is there.

And her response is "I don't have ID with me because I don't need to show any identification" At this point im starting to wonder if Im going insane or if the world has just gone crazy.

After that I finally get to the desk and turn in my paperwork. It all is in order and I hurry back to the car to get home as fast as possible. And now that im back home and writing this journal I really just feel like going back to bed because I have this feeling that this day will probably only get worse.

Anyway that was my little days adventure in what id describe as the insanity of other people. And all I can think now is no wonder that alot of people feel like they have lost their hope in humanity.

Oh well I hope everyone has a great weekend. Im just going to spend it sleeping and playing videogames hopefully (so what I do everyday basically)

So I finally decided to get around to making something off my 2nd twitter account. It had been standing empty and un-used for a little while so I thought why not make it into my Cubfur/littlefur account. Some people may think its unneccesary to have 2 twitter accounts but my main account I use alot for things like promoting videos, announcing when im livestreaming or even just following and talking to people (like people I used to do podcasting with) and alot of these people do not know about my cubfur/littlefur side and most of them are people I feel dont need to know about it.

So yeah if your a cubfur/littlefur and wanna follow me on twitter to talk about cub stuff or other things

My 2nd twitter is https://twitter.com/LilSwedeBrony

and if you wanna follow my main account to see the random stuff I do its https://twitter.com/Dolk95

So yeah just a minor little update on what ive been doing. Also a fair warning my main twitter can sometimes be a bit vent-ish or sad while I will try to not post anything like that on my cubfur/littlefur twitter.

(Just to clarify Soc is what we in sweden call Health and Welfare)

Everything just seems to go to hell for me right now. I've been on the phone with Soc today trying to figure out why I didn't get my full amount of money this month. So today I finally got to talk to someone after trying to reach them for 3 days. According to them I should have gotten a decision about my money in paper form. I never got that. They tell me that I can appeal the decision and argue my case as to why I deserve my money. So for people to understand this better I'm gonna explain exactly what I have been told by Soc. So when I was on the phone with them I was told that I had not followed the guidlines that had been set for me by Soc. One of the things was that I had not been in contact with my handler at the work center. The thing is I talked to him and the agreement was that I was gonna meet him twice a month. HE was supposed to call me with times that would work for him. I never heard a word from him for almost 6 or 7 weeks. When I decided I had enough and called him he had no memory of having to call me with any times. Another of the thing was that I was supposed to attend a workshop thing every monday. The first 3 times I attended it was canceled due to not enough people turning up. The 4th time I arrived I was told it had been changed to tuesdays and that now all the participants in the work center would go to the workshop. That would mean over 40-50+ people. I talked to them and explained that I suffer from mild social anxiety and social phobia. It was then arranged that I didn't need to attend that workshop because it would not make me feel good. And then Soc accuses me of not going to it though I was supposed to. The third thing was that my handler at Soc was given the rights to talk to my therapist so that they could come to an agreement. They came to the agreement that I was supposed to only attend the work center twice a month. Now my handler at Soc is on sick leave and no one can reach her. The people I had to talk to instead of my handler has no idea about anything concerning my current situation. So now they are refusing me money and they no nothing about my situation.

To make everything better I was starting to run out of my anti-depressant medication. So I called up my doctor only to find out that he had quit his job. I was never informed about this and I wasn't even assigned a new doctor. So I had to call them and request to get a new doctor which they are currently work at. And after that I hadn't heard anything from my therapist in almost a month so I had to call her to get a new time to meet her even though. Again SHE was supposed to send me a letter with a time to meet her.

And ofcourse after all this I was the victim of credit card fraud and lost 120usd.

And all of this has led to up now. I am now sitting here almost broke. With no means to pay my phone bill or pay for food and other stuff. I had to pay rent with the majority of the money I still had. My parents are having a hard financial time so they can just barely support me for this month unless I get the remaining money that Soc owes me.

I honestly don't know what to do now. I feel like im going crazy.

I have a meeting with my work center handler tomorrow to try and sort all of this out. Although I am not very hopefull that anything will get sorted out.

Just everything seems to go to hell for me now.

So late last night I got a confirmation email from paypal telling me that a purchase I had made had been successful. This struck me as quiet odd as I had not bought anything with paypal and wasn't planning on doing so as my financial status was quiet bad. I thought this was some kind of a mistake at first and that it was a fake email. So I logged into paypal to make sure. And when I checked my account there was a order for a 120 usd iphone bought on Ebay from someone in the US. I ofcourse immidiently called up my bank and asked them to cancel my card. Luckily the main office for my bank is open 24/7 so canceling my card was no problem at all. I was told to go down to my local bank in the morning to file a report about credit card fraud. As I am writing this I have not yet been to the bank to see if they can refund me the money that was stolen I have however filed a police report as the person who used my paypal account left his full name and adress so that the Iphone he bought with my money could be sent home to his place. The thing that shocked me quiet badly was that this was someone in the US that had used my account and I can't for the life of me understand how he got my information. Usually credit card fraud is possible after having used your credit card in a rigged card reader. But I have never in my life been in the US and certainly not in the last few days. I just came back from NFC. So that got me thinking that maybe my information was stolen during the con. Ofcourse I can't be sure of this it can be someone that just got lucky or that my computer had a virus on it. I can't know for sure.

The thing I wanted to say with this journal is that I beg everyone that use paypal regularly (especially artists on this site) Be very careful about how you go about using it. I thought I was safe because I kept getting messages from paypal telling me that due to "new" security measures they were going to close down my account if I didn't update my information. This was a legit email from paypal so I thought I was 100% safe. But this just goes to show that no one is ever fully safe while handling money and transactions on what is pretty much a 3rd party site.

In conclusion. Please please please be careful while using paypal and if you suspect the slightest weird thing about the site or anything be extra cautious. I really don't wanna see this happen to anyone else.

What did I ever honestly do to deserve this? The way I am treated by all the people that I used to call "Friends" people I have known for years turn their backs on me. And the only time I ever get to talk to them they want me to take my life. People I used to look up to that now spend their time cyber bullying me to see if they can push me over the edge. They keep trying and trying and I am scared that soon they will succeed. Soon I won't have the will to keep on anymore. I can't stand it anymore. Am I honestly such a horrible person that I deserve to be pushed to suicide? I always tried to change and be a better person. But as soon as I take one step forward someone has to come along and push me two steps back. I had finally started to feel okay about myself. I had started to enjoy life. For the first time in 10+ years I actually wanted to live. But ofcourse I wasn't allowed that. As soon as I felt like that my bestfriend turns his back to me and treats me like crap. And someone I had started to consider as my 2nd best friend starts treating me like shit. Why? I just wanna know why. Why do certain people feel that they have to push me to see if they can get me to try and kill myself. And when I confront these people they act like they are the victims. They tell me I made their lives living hell by being friends with them. Am I some kind of a monster or what? I just can't stand it anymore. My medication doesn't do anything for it either. I am scared that I am going to do something hastily. But I guess who cares right? Apparently no one. I honestly just can't keep on soon. I am living in my personal hell and I can never escape it. No matter what I do I was meant to suffer I guess. I was never meant to be happy. I was meant to die.

So I always used to hear about this thing called "con drop" It's apparently when after a con you feel really sad and down that it's over. I always used to think that it was just some silly thing some people experienced. I mean after all I had been to Comi-Con,Dreamhack and Närcon and never experienced anything of the kind. Quiet the opposite usually I was happy when cons were over so that I could just sit down and relax and play video games again. But this time it's different. I am actually feeling con drop for the first time ever and it just feels so weird. It just kinda feels empty. I wasn't expecting it to hit me this hard or even at all especially because of some of the stress I had been under during NFC. But now that it's over I just feel so sad and bored. I can't sit down and play games without feeling bored. I guess it's an sign that I was actually having alot of fun at the con.

Oh well It'll probably go away in a bit and I'll be back to being boring old me again playing games all day xD

So here I am back at home again from NFC. Sadly I had to leave 2 days early due to some health related issues that I won't go into because this journal is to talk about the fun I had. As some might know this was my first furry convention ever and to be honest I was really nervous when I first left for the con and there were several times when I really just wanted to turn back and go home and hide. However I am glad that I decided to attend even if it was just for two days. There were some fun panels and other things going on. And it was kinda amazing getting to see actual fursuits IRL for the first time ever.

There are a few events I attended that stuck out for me as extra fun. The cubfur meet n greet was alot of fun even though I spent alot of it hiding in a corner because I was shy. The thing I didn't expect was that even though I was really shy people still came up and talked to me and were just absolutely nice and friendly.

The 2nd event that I just absolutely loved was the cubfur scribble event hosted by  toddlergirl It was the first time I have ever just drawn for fun in several years (and drawing with crayons is alot harder than I remember xD). I also just have to say that the event was just made extra special because the thing you did was draw a picture and then they put it up on the wall and you got a sticker aswell. All of that just kinda made me feel super little. I don't think I have ever felt that little before. I was also super nervous at first about turning in the picture I drew because I was kinda scared that it would be really bad. But Gemma and Paul are just absolutely amazingly nice people. I hope that if Gemma comes back to NFC next year that this event will happen again.

Also for the people curious about the stickers I got 3. One for good manners another one for good behaviour and the third one I got was for helping clean up when the event was done :P

Sadly I left before the cub room party. I was really looking forward to talking to Gemma and the others alot more.

So the convention had it's ups and downs it wasn't all bad but there was moments when not everything was good either. For example during the first day I suffered a panic attack when the rest of people was away watching Zootopia.

Finally I just wanna thank the people I met at the con that was just really amazing and friendly.The people that really stood out for me was.
 Toddlergirl /  BabyStar
 Yookey
 ReXam-1
 cute_fox_cat
 Luring

and several others. So Thanks for the lovely time and I hope that I'll get to come back next year and have fun again ^_^

Stolen from  NazzNikoNanuke

How (bad are you) interesting is your life meme.


If you have 00-10 ... write [I'm a goody-goody]
If you have 11-20 ... write [I'm still a goody-goody]
If you have 21-30 ... write [I'm average]
If you have 31-40 ... write [I'm a bad kid]
If you have 41-50 ... write [I'm a very bad influence]
If you have 51-60 ... write [I'm a horrible person]
If you have 61-70 ... write [I should be in jail]
If you have 71-80 ... write [I should be dead]
If you have 81-90 ... write [I got a ticket to Hell]


HAVE YOU...

[x ] smoked
[x] consumed alcohol
[] slept in the same bed with someone of the opposite sex
[x] slept in the same bed with someone of the same sex
[x] kissed someone of the same sex
[] had sex
[x] had someone in your room other than family
[x] watched porn
[x] bought porn
[ ] tried drugs

TOTAL SO FAR: 7

[x] taken painkillers
[x ] taken someone else's prescription medicine
[] lied to your parents (A lot still do to this day)
[x ] lied to a friend, even for their own benefit
[x] Snuck out of the house
[x] done something illegal (spray painting)
[x] felt hurt
[x] hurt someone (Yupp unintentionally and intentionally)
[x] wished someone to die (all my years of school)
[ ] seen someone die

TOTAL SO FAR: 15

[x] missed curfew
[] stayed out all night
[x] eaten a carton of ice cream by yourself
[x] been to a therapist (still going to one)
[x] received a ticket
[ ] been to rehab
[ ] dyed your hair
[ ] been in an accident
[x] been to a club
[x] been to a bar

TOTAL SO FAR: 21

[ ] been to a wild party
[ ] been to a Mardi Gras parade (Don't live in the us)
[x] drank more than three alcoholic beverages in a night (every time I go out drinking)
[ ] had a spring break in Florida (once again don't live in the US)
[ ] sniffed anything
[] wore black nail polish
[x] wore arm bands (Yes I own several different ones)
[x] wore t-shirts with band names <3 <3
[x] listened to rap (Everything from N.W.A to Eminem if I like it I listen to it)
[ ] owned a 50 Cent CD, even if it wasn't purchased by you

TOTAL SO FAR: 25

[x] dressed gothic, for any reason
[] dressed girly, for any reason
[x] dressed punk, for any reason
[x] dressed grunge, for any reason
[x] stole something (when I was really young)
[x] been too drunk to remember anything (yupp but only once)
[ ] blacked out
[ ] fainted
[ ] had a crush on a neighbour
[ ] had sex with a neighbour

TOTAL SO FAR: 30

[x] had a crush on a friend
[x] been to a concert
[] dry-humped someone
[ ] been called a slut
[x] called someone a slut (many many times)
[x] installed speakers in a car (yupp my brothers car)
[ ] broken a mirror
[x] showered at someone of the opposites sex's house
[x] brushed your teeth with someone else's toothbrush
[x] brushed your hair with someone else's hairbrush

TOTAL SO FAR: 37

[ ] considered Ludicrous your favourite rapper (Nah not my favorite rapper)
[x] seen an R-rated movie
[x] cruised the mall
[x] skipped school (way to many times to count)
[ ] had surgery
[] had an injury
[ ] gone to court
[ ] walked out of a restaurant without paying/tipping
[x] caught something on fire (School books during summer break)
[x] lied about your age

TOTAL SO FAR: 42

[ ] owned/rented an apartment/house
[x] broke the law in the police's presence (yes but only small things like littering and jay walking)
[ ] made out with someone who had a GF/BF
[] got in trouble with the police (not yet)
[x] talked to a stranger
[x] hugged a stranger
[ ] kissed a stranger
[] rode in the car with a stranger
[x] been harassed
[x] been verbally harassed

TOTAL SO FAR: 47

[x] met face-to-face with someone you met online (met my best friend online)
[x] stayed online for 5+ hours straight (everyday)
[x] talked on the phone for more than 4 hours straight (with my BF at the time when I was hospitalized)
[x] watched TV for 5 hours straight
[x] been to a fair
[x] been called a bad influence
[ ] drank and drove
[x] prank-called someone (me and some friends used to prank a help-line)
[x] laid on a couch with someone of the opposite sex
[x] cheated on a test (alot of times)

BIG TOTAL: 56

Title: If you have 51-60 ... write [I'm a horrible person] : Apparently I'm a horrible person xD

Ive been wondering for a while how do you go about fixing a broken sleep schedual? Recently I have pretty much turned the day upside down. So for example I go to sleep at noon and sleep until like 22.00 and then im awake until noon and then I do it all over again. I've been trying to fix this because it messes with my head alot. Ive tried the usual stuff like staying awake and going to bed at a normal time in the evening but it just doesn't seem to work. No matter how awake I think I am I just collapse around noon and have to sleep. So any tips on how to fix this? Any tips are greatly appreciated ^.^

1. What is your fursona's name?
Teralak but he prefers to be called Tera

2. How old is your fursona?
Around 4 years old

3. What is your fursona?
He is a little fox

4. How much time have you had your fursona?
I've had the idea of him for a long time but the first piece of art of him I got about 3 months ago

5. Is your fursona inspired by something?
He is inspired alot from myself from when I was younger

6. How much art do you have of your fursona?
Some but not alot

7. You made your fursona or you buy it?
I came up with the idea of my fursona but the first piece of art I got as a free sketch

8. Why do you consider your fursona special?
I don't really consider him special. He is just a regular fursona

9. Does your fursona act too much as you or are they different from you?
He acts like me when I was younger

10. What kind of hair your does your fursona have?
Orange hair

11. Put some drawings of your fursona you like the most
http://www.furaffinity.net/view/18456412/ by  kittybird

http://www.furaffinity.net/view/18127705/ by  toddlergirl

http://www.furaffinity.net/view/19126753/ by  Yookey


12. What music represents your fursona?
Im not really sure actually

13. If your fursona were insane what music would represent them?
Haha not sure about that either

14. Do you wish your fursona were real?
That could probably be pretty awesome ^^

15. Do you have any games of your sona?
Nope

16. What would you do if you met your fursona in real life?
Play and have fun with him ^.^

It's a very sad day today. I went and logged in to my babyfur twitter account and the first thing I saw was a message saying that the site ABDLPixel has been shut down. Now this makes me very sad because that website was the first AB/DL community that I found. I met so many nice people on there that I don't think I'll ever get to talk to again. I remember so many fun times chatting with people that I came to call my friends. They were some really nice people that encouraged me to accept my ab/dl side. They helped me accept myself for who I am. It makes me sad to think that I might never talk to any of those people ever again.

Little Mick, Big Bro Marcos, Ruffle and everyone else I will miss you alot. Hopefully one day the site might come back and I can talk to you all again. Until then I hope you all are okay wherever you are