As it says there.
I've spent all week animating this, and I managed to actually get all the animation done within the week.
Aside from sound effect or two, all that's needed is the voice work! X3
The final animation will be a little over two minutes long, so I hope ya'll enjoy it when it's done~

I decided to give my Youtube channel some attention,
so I half assed a video just now to post my latest song~

Give it a like or comment, and maybe subscribe if you haven't already~

Still not sure what I'm doing with that.

Might just double them up instead of going 5s.

Like. Man I just have massively horrid anxiety and it's literally driving me crazy and I'm overthinking shit when I don't need to.

I still need something to live off of tho.

Again, if you're cool and don't mind sending donations, that's cool too.
https://ko-fi.com/Tanookicatoon

I'm also starting up weekend streams again,
since, well
My mental health seems to be picking up.

As I mentioned. Anxiety. Horrid habits picked up from PTS.

I'm starting to recognize when I'm having problems and I'm taking care of them as I should.
Of course I live alone, and when you have mental issues like this, you're mind tends to just lie to you and it's pretty hard doing it on my own.
But, as I said,
Recognizing the issues, triggers and such,
I've been getting grasp at reality again.
Like, I'm seeing things that have normally sent me over the edge, like zero to ONE HUNDRED in a second,
and then having no reaction to them.

And honestly, that feels good.

But I still have occasional anxiety attacks. Yadda yadda.
I'm running circles around myself,

anyway.

Things are feeling better. But I still need help.
I still don't feel comfortable taking money for commissions before anything is done.
So like,
If peeps who care (and want cheap sketches) can check out my streams, that would be pretty cool.

I'd just love for things to finally start getting easier.
And like, I can get all the mental health in the world, but it aint gonna do anything about me still having to pay for rent and utilities.

man, I honestly fucking hate money.

As most have been hearing, likely from a lot of others,
but shit aint been nice to anyone.

I've mentioned I'm no longer accepting shinies, because they go towards Paypal, which takes a bunch of money from ya'll, and then me.

I've moved to Stripe to have the money matters easier on me and commissioners,
but like

I just can't live off the prices I have.

I've been looking at prices of other artists, and from what I'm seeing,
I really need to be multiplying everything by 5.

I already know I have issues with majorly overdoing the quality that I was supposed to be offering for my current 10, 20 & 30 dollar commissions.
The quality I've been doing is basically what I've been offering for the monochrome sketch tier.

I need to just overhaul everything.

I know I hardly do enough commissions, and I know how people already feel about me being incredibly selective with my commissions.

I'm just trying.

As always, I do appreciate donations if you're cool with just being happy trying to keep me afloat in the mean time.
https://ko-fi.com/tanookicatoon

Don't use Shinies please.

I need to deactivate that.

If you want to send any donations please send them through my Ko-fi here.
https://ko-fi.com/tanookicatoon

Shinies only go towards paypal.
Paypal takes a fee from you when you donate,
and they take another fee from me when I deposit the money in my bank.
Paypal has raised their fees.
5 dollars becomes 4 dollars.
It's bullshit.
Please don't use Shinies.

Also
Rent is getting to be too much.
I'm having a major hard time paying it off
i'm too fucking slow with commissions
stress is fucking me up too much
the stuff I do draw is just safe shit I do because it's already there in my head.
It's fucking difficult to come up with new shit even if you write a whole fucking detailed description for me.
It literally hurts to think now.
I'm going fucking mental from the stress and I'm literally just begging for money to help relieve the stress.
I need a new apartment with cheaper rent.
I'm being fucking screwed left and right, i'm so fucking tired.

I'm pretty much repeating myself,

but I just gotta say it.

Thank you all for being mature individuals about my characters.

I'm asexual.

I'm 30 years old now.

I've done so much damn discovering of myself over the years
And like
I don't know why it took me so damn long to admit it to myself, but
I never liked vore sexually.

Never.

It's exciting. That's the whole reason I love it.

But sexually?
It was never the reason.

I loved the attention it got me.
I loved the interaction between two characters.
It was never the vore.
Again. I loved the attention it got me, so I just did what people wanted.

This has been the reason I've been leaning more towards SFW artwork these days, and having a hard time accepting certain commissions from people.
Even if you find my artwork "kinky" or whatever. I don't.
I've ALWAYS drawn "vore" even before it was even called vore.

So
That's what I'm continuing to do.

Please remember, the whole thing about "Fetish" is that it's just meant to be an "obssession" towards something the general public isn't usually into.
But lately, with the advent of a new generation of furries not truly understanding things, and spreading what they think, like it's the word of God,
I just don't agree with how they have gone around and began to tell everyone they like what they like because Google gave them an answer that has nothing to do with vore.

VORE is NOT short for Vorarephilia.
Vore was chosen to describe "devouring stories" because it was the suffix to Carnivore/Herbivore.
Vorarephilia was a term that was created by psychiatrists that couldn't make a lick of sense of the 2001 cannibal murderer Armin Meiwes and his victim.
This was something my mother thought I was into because she did the exact same shit thinking Google was giving her the right answer.

I've literally lived my entire life with people thinking I was into cannibal murder because some douchebag killed someone,
and because this cemented the word Vorarephilia into google,
now any stupid kid who look up "what is vore" into Google is going to think
"Oh it's a sexual fetish, I'm into this because it gets my dick hard, everyone is into it for this as well",

So now this same bullshit is being repeated by the younger generation as well,

And tbh. I think it's about time I took fucking control of my life and just said NO, fuck you, I like vore because I fucking like it, and I'm going to just draw what I damn well please.

Yeah, I already hear people crying "hypocrite this, hypocrite that"

Again. I'm tired of letting people tell me I like what I like because of what THEY think.
I'm tired of people twisting things I've said before to weaponize for whatever reason against me.
I'm tired of people just straight up lying about me.

I've already apologized time after time for the shit I did.
I'm sorry.
I can't take back what I've done,
and I am very much still seeing and reaping what I've sewn.


So
TL;DR
Thank you all for being mature about the things I've been creating and posting lately.
I really appreciate it.

If you really enjoy what I'm making, I highly suggest(/e-beg, pfft) you to send in a donation here and there so I can keep making what I make,
and can comfortably just and do what I do.
The money goes to food, bills, meds, etc. All the things that just keep me sane and in the right mind to, well, do what I do.

Again. Thank you.

all of the scenes I've completed so far,
plus 2 new ones I added just last night

Just an update on the music video I'm working on for myself.
Using it as an excuse for practicing techniques I'll likely be using in commissioned animations in the future.

Basically
I'm having trouble focusing.
Anxiety is fucking me up.

I've already got people talking shit about it,
but I need my meds.
The non over the counter ones.

1. I just don't make the kind of money to have insurance; typical American healthcare, that kinda thing.

2. If I did get healthcare based medicine, they'd have me on so much shit, I'd be risking my health more than anything.
Actual medicine scares me. The kind of things that happened to me while on antidepressants...never again.

3. Smoking covers literally everything.
My ptsd, anxiety, joint pain, migraines, barometric pressure sensitivity, pain EVERYWHERE
all gone.

I don't like asking the same people for money.
I'm just looking for help to keep my wits in place so I can keep drawing and animating.

as I said.
I've tried, but I'm basically unhirable.
I'm doing the best with what I can with what I got,
and what I got is the skills to draw an animate,
but it's difficult when I can't keep my head on straight.

A loop I've been working on for a couple days now.

Please. Like, subscribe. Whatever.
I'm gonna be trying to animate more often,
So you'll probably see more of this from now on.
I've already got something planned, based on something someone had planned a while back, so it's good that I'm getting the hang of things now.

Just more little previews I'm unable to post here simply because of the format. lol

Title sequence


Base dance animation


I had a hell of a fun time getting that dance to work the way I wanted it to.

It was originally going to just be keyframes,
but I went nuts this morning and busted out some tweens in 4 hours, and got this entire dance running on 2s now. lol
As stated in the video description,
I don't plan on just having the dance alone,
there's going to be other little scenes, and I'll be using the dance to build up bigger scenes in the same fashion I did with the previous preview~

It's hard to preview animations here.

Anyway,
I've been getting back into animation with Flash8 here and there.
This is pretty much the only way you can watch a preview of this because

1) It's probably not going to play here on FA.

2) Definitely not because I don't remember how to make a preloader. LOL

3) That ending scene will literally make your computer lag like crazy if you actually tried to play it out of Flash. 😂

Anyway, This is still just what I got so far, because there are things I want to do in this animation that require more technical effects and super organization and such,
ESPECIALLY since I'm going to (and already have) replaced the music file with the proper and slower music file.

So it's going to be a little easier to animate,
and it's going to allow me to animate some slightly more nuanced things and such.

Just not right now tho. It's been a while since I got back to this...

ANYWAYYYyyy.
Enjoy what I got. LOL

So like,
I know not a lot of people donate,
but like, literally,
to the one person who donated, like 25 bucks,
bruh, that's grocery money for half the month boiiii~
I'm an ex-navy cook, I know how to do a lot with very little. LOL

In other thanks,
Just,

man

Again, I have to apologize first, because of how I've acted in the past, and things I've said

because it honestly feels so nice having come back to FA in the last year and a half.

We all know that back in 2017-2018, Tumblr blew up and the worst of the worst took over Twitter, and turned it into one of the most toxic environments I've ever been in.

And that sort of environment really fucks with you.

Twitter is just extremely immature, and has this crazy notion that everyone is out to get you, and that anything anyone does has some ulterior motive that is geared towards something that makes you wrong to exists.

I've introduced characters and concepts that were meant to empower trauma I still have haunting me from my past,
and people took that, and tried to label me as a pedophile simply because the character is the age I was when went through said trauma.

Again. I basically take back a lot of the things I've said in the past about FA,
merely because, coming back
I'm starting to just notice that the general population of FA is simply more mature that Twitter.

Twitter is nothing by 18-20 year olds who just got out of highschool who think they're going to make the world a better place by attacking everything they want to deem as problematic content,
and as someone who is literally 10 years older than the people causing said problems,
I honestly have no idea how I let myself get into the exact same mindset.

Mental stress, "peer" pressure. It's a scary thing.
People you think are friends become enemies.
Enemies you apologize to become friends.

It's been fucking wild.

Anyway.

I don't know, I just woke up in a really fucking good mood.

Just a reminder
I am still indeed living alone and jobless,

I'm very close to getting my second vaccine, which should make it a lot safer for me to go out,
but until them I'm still immunocompromised and should not be going outside.

It's still very difficult to raise funds on my own,

I'm only asking, if you really enjoy my work and wish for me to continue having the ability to post,
Donations are just really nice here and there.

I hear most feel some anxiety from donating small change.
I guarantee you, 90% of the time I use it to buy my next set of groceries.

I'm grateful of any donations!
Thank you! 🙏🏽

I've actually visited a few people's profiles who I know have some shit against me,
and have seen them making journals taking jabs at me for things I used to do,
mind you, this is only a few months back, as in they said something about it in October and I just now noticed it.

I've already stated it before.

I haven't done jack shit having to do with making callouts.
I quit that shit two years ago, first to focus on school, then later just to completely scrub my head for mental health.

I'm done with that shit.
No more call outs, no more reports. I haven't touched that shit in years.

My stance very quickly became, "If no one gives a shit about what I think, then why the fuck am I still working on this? Why should I actually give a shit about adults literally playing pretend?

And tbh, I don't give a shit anymore.

Leave me the fuck alone and stop making shit up about me.

I've made my stance clear on what I think and have already shown that I'll reflect that in my art.
Sorry if it doesn't reflect any of the bullshit you've come up about me
Sorry if you have to resort to saying "they just come up with shit to try to stay relevant"

This is literally furry. The majority of the fandom lives off of perverting Disney, and the next hottest fur-bait in the media.

Who the fuck doesn't work on shit that's relevant?

Anyway

I quit. I quit a long fucking time ago.
Shit even longer than that, I straight up went to a lot of people and just had to apologize for what I did.
I did it privately. No fucking screen shots.
And in fact, most of the people I was actually able to get in touch with mostly agreed that they just felt like I was doing what I thought was right at the time and they ended up getting caught in it, shit, they even accepted the apologies and unblocked me everywhere.

As for the people who I can't get in contact with, these are the people who continue to keep making up rumors and bullshit based on half-baked versions of the truth.
Most of them will just straight up lie and tell you that I somehow fabricated evidence that got people banned.

How in the fuck am I supposed to do that?
FA literally requires you to link posts to them. That is the only evidence you can provide.
FA has NEVER taken screen shots as evidence, so whoever the fuck is telling people this is straight up full of shit,
and the people who somehow believe them even bigger fools,
just

bruh.

This is shit that I put behind me as far back as 2018.

At the end of 2019 I had to drop out of school, so I announced that I would be needing to go full time to support myself because not having a job for a year from school excluded me from being able to get accepted into the unemployment program in my state.
In response to this, people decided to make a call out about me saying that I leak people's Patreon content.

Enter fucking 2020
The entire year was a fucking nightmare.
But again. To focus on mental health I did my best to focus on myself and people who cared about me.

2021.
I can't even catch a break.

Halfway through 2020, I was able to get back in touch with someone who had previously had a major falling out with me.
I had thought they changed. So when they started telling me that they had to get away from their mother,
I told them that, while I basically had nothing and due to the fact that I have basically been living off of charity,
but my door was open to them.

Well, come January, and they arrive around the 15th, and do nothing but disrespect me and insult me the entire time.
They left garbage all over the place, and the ensuing mess attracted roaches, that I am still exterminating to this day.

When they decided to leave me high and dry without so much as helping me pay rent or the bills,
I felt the need to open up about this,
so It started with friends,
and then slowly as I started to clean my apartment, I started seeing trash from this person in places that upset me to a point of breaking down and having to straight up record the mess that was left.

The person's response was to show that they had taken pictures of the fucking nightmare they built up in my apartment, and then proceeded to tell people that this is what my place looked like when they arrived, and that's why they left.

NO, they left, because they told me they were going to help out with bills and rent,
and when they spent all of their stimulus check on McDonald's and furniture, they fucking called a friend to send them bags so they could leave up to Michigan.

This shit has literally gotten to the point where people have literally come into my own fucking HOME to do this shit to me.

It's literally gotten THAT personal.

Not only have people tried to fuck with my own lively hood without a fucking care in the world,
they've straight up come into my fucking HOME to try and ruin my life.



Leave me the fuck alone already.



I'm basically off my meds and needed to vent.
I'm sorry.
But FA doesn't ever get the news about what's going on in my life the way Twitter just lets me dump my feelings.


I'm tired ya'll.

I'm really fucking tired.

Please use my Discord to discuss commissions.

Yes I suppose some people do become passing acquaintances
but seeking friendship is never on my mind.

Please make primary use of my Discord for discussing commissions.

oh wait

you can't really do that here

but I don't have over 2k comfirmations that everyone saw my art

I just dumped loada sketches as well as other stuff couple days ago

check it out~

Also workin on a comic,
Still kinda just introducing things
but hey,
I'm workin on it~

Just the usual.

Lost of little posts, and the total faves this week went through the roof.

Enough to let me know nearly everyone has faved my work,

not everything is a hit, but in total, there's enough to let me know, my work is being seen by ya'll

but... please

so I can continue. A little support?

Donations, commissions

I'm slowly cutting down the old commissions while trying to balance new work

Yes, same thing every day.

But please, anything helps
https://ko-fi.com/tanookicatoon

just testing stuff

If anything

check out my channel
cuz like
definitely been trying to branch out for years. pfft

So
I got things working again

I'm not ranking the quality of my life at the moment
because talking about it seems to bring bad luck

but it's going pretty {nope} right now
I managed to draw for a second on the tablet

and I also got Photoshop installed, as well as my old Wacom hooked up as a back up.

Rent is late like usual.
Always due on the first.

I still need to feed myself and pay bills... and have no income.

Just saying, I'm scared to take money from people unless I have something to present,
and with the way things tend to go, I'm just like...
EUGH

It's scary and causes me tons of anxiety.

So please bear with me.

Donations are always cool if you wanna do that.
Ko-fi.com/tanookicatoon

SO

I tried to make it clear in my last journal.

I'm basically living off of charity for the last year.

I haven't been able to get a job.

I can hardly afford food.

Typical mental health stuff.
I'm pretty sure I'm bipolar, and I've been having crippling mood swings
caused by basically everything I've gone through over the past 5 years...

and of course, I don't have money to treat it as often as I'd like to.

ON TOP OF THIS

My fancy tablet that I bought for school and art has basically shit the bed.
It wont stop having problem after problem, and the day before yesterday it decided to just Blue screen on me.
And it wont stop.
I can't draw for less than 5 minutes before it has to restart.

SO
I gave up and installed Photoshop on my old laptop from the Navy
and busted out the old tablet.

WELL IT WORKS

But it's not listening to pressure at all.
It says it's working but...eugh

I just want shit to work
I don't have a job, I don't have money for food.
When I do have money, it usually IMMEDIATELY goes to bills.
So I've been living off of spaghetti and bologna sandwiches since today last year.
I've had the power shut off on me more times than I need it to
and just

i'm tired ya'll
i don't know what to do anymore

I've tried.
I tried opening for commissions
and when I do, no one comes

It never fails, no one comes until I'm closed, or indisposed.

I just can't any more.
I've even updated my commission info and explained several times on Twitter what is going on.
And it's like people don't even listen.

I'm tired of being tired all the time.
I'm tired of being scared all the time.

The people who have helped,
I end up feeling like i'm just sucking them dry, and like
Thank you so much for keeping a roof over my head for the last year

but like... please

bear with me...

rent has been late every damn month just...

i see people out there faving my work

people tell me "I want to support you" but of course "but I want something in return"

and I'm just like... bruh
i'm sorry
I just can't give it to you
i can't any more
I'm out of strength

So the brain worms are fucking me up too much
and I am basically compromised to point where I just can't draw new shit.
It's like an art block but worse. Like I feel like I just forgot how to draw.

But I can still ink and color like a mother fucker.

SO

New Commission Type

Collab Comms

Basically, if you have any sketches or whatever I'll complete it for you.
WITH PERMISSION, I will even go over other artist's sketches.

$10 inks
$20 flats
$30 cell shading
$40 soft shading and detailing

👉QUICK EXTRAS♥~
+5$ per character in no color/no shade.
+10$ per character in color/in shade.

I'm just trying to get work any way I can,
So please, if you have anything, don't be afraid to ask~

I see ya'll favin all that art.
That's a lotta faves. 👀💦

I'm happy you fellas like my art an all,
but please
i beg ya
help me out.
There's nearly 3k of ya'll here
bruh, if I got a dollar from everyone, that would be hella awesome.

I'd be able to pay my rent, bills and eat.

which means

art
art
art and more art.

I would love to be able to keep a roof over my head.

anxiety aint helpin either.

I got Ko-Fi here
https://ko-fi.com/tanookicatoon

I also have shinies set up as well.
they both go to the same place.

just really really trying to get by.

I basically got like 2 really nice people keeping me alive through charity.

If you are cool,
I do take donations at my Ko-Fi
https://ko-fi.com/tanookicatoon

Also please, heck out my streams.
I know it's not consistent
but from 1pm to 8pm I offer $10 sketches.

I'm also now offering $30 head/mawshots:
Kuhntee
Patchy

Please send me a note or contact me on Discord to schedule a one-on-one, whenever you got time~

--

A reminder.
I'm basically unhirable. I'm not finding any jobs where I live.
So art is all I got.

I'm stuck inside 24/7.
I've got nothing to do but have emotional breakdowns and do art.

Thank you~