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Sorry About The Last Journal
Posted 7 years agoEveryone, I'm sorry for my negativity towards the end of the last journal I made. I have a hard time being happy for myself, so it's hard for me to be happy for someone else. I know I sounded like an asshat and I don't blame you for judging me for it.
I'm opening my fullbody commissions again, howeverm they're very limited, as I don't particularly like drawing them unless the topic is something I personally care about. I don't mind drawing for others, don't get me wrong! I'm just not as motivated as I would normally be. (I sound like a dick again, dammit... ><) I got upset because the way I draw faces now varies a LOT. What happened to the way I USED to draw them? ;-; Maybe I need to practice more or draw less... I'm not sure... I'll get along and finish everyone's art... (I'm not motivated because I feel like no one likes my art, so what's the point to finishing anything? I wish I got a couple of commissions from non-trolls and I'd feel better...)
Anyway, now it's Doberman Month! I've been waiting for this FOREVER! When I finish the commission sheet for it, it'll have officially started. I'm going to offer a sale for Doberman and Doberman-inspired, Doberman Mixes, Doberman hybrids, whatever! I'm also offering a "Draw Your OC as a Doberman" sale as well! Your character ISN'T a Doberman? No problem! I'll draw them as one with their original colors! (Plus some design traits as well, don't worry.) .
I'm at a impasse here. I don't know if I want to go to MomoCon or not. I want to see Pan-Pizza and Mercy's VA. I want to go to Night at the Georgia Aquarium. I want to squeeze the life out of a starfish in the touch tank. But, I fear if I DO go, the money I raised for it, all the time and planning I spent preparing for it will be for naught, when I should have focused on getting my fursuit... I also want to go to Megaplex (Anthrocon may never be a thing for me, because it's so far away...), so I may focus all of my energy into going THERE. I just want to meet Pan-Pizza in person just ONCE... I hope to make enough to go at least one day, but I doubt THAT will even happen.
Also, can we talk about how about awesome yesterday was? It was both Easter AND April Fool's Day! :D AC:NL was great, because I thought I was going to miss out on Blanca. XD (However, it was harder playing her mini-game this year without the internet for help. But, a few resets and scoldings from Resetti handled that!)
I'm opening my fullbody commissions again, howeverm they're very limited, as I don't particularly like drawing them unless the topic is something I personally care about. I don't mind drawing for others, don't get me wrong! I'm just not as motivated as I would normally be. (I sound like a dick again, dammit... ><) I got upset because the way I draw faces now varies a LOT. What happened to the way I USED to draw them? ;-; Maybe I need to practice more or draw less... I'm not sure... I'll get along and finish everyone's art... (I'm not motivated because I feel like no one likes my art, so what's the point to finishing anything? I wish I got a couple of commissions from non-trolls and I'd feel better...)
Anyway, now it's Doberman Month! I've been waiting for this FOREVER! When I finish the commission sheet for it, it'll have officially started. I'm going to offer a sale for Doberman and Doberman-inspired, Doberman Mixes, Doberman hybrids, whatever! I'm also offering a "Draw Your OC as a Doberman" sale as well! Your character ISN'T a Doberman? No problem! I'll draw them as one with their original colors! (Plus some design traits as well, don't worry.) .
I'm at a impasse here. I don't know if I want to go to MomoCon or not. I want to see Pan-Pizza and Mercy's VA. I want to go to Night at the Georgia Aquarium. I want to squeeze the life out of a starfish in the touch tank. But, I fear if I DO go, the money I raised for it, all the time and planning I spent preparing for it will be for naught, when I should have focused on getting my fursuit... I also want to go to Megaplex (Anthrocon may never be a thing for me, because it's so far away...), so I may focus all of my energy into going THERE. I just want to meet Pan-Pizza in person just ONCE... I hope to make enough to go at least one day, but I doubt THAT will even happen.
Also, can we talk about how about awesome yesterday was? It was both Easter AND April Fool's Day! :D AC:NL was great, because I thought I was going to miss out on Blanca. XD (However, it was harder playing her mini-game this year without the internet for help. But, a few resets and scoldings from Resetti handled that!)
Okay, Updates
Posted 7 years agoFor one, delays.
*archers aim at me*
WAIT!
LET ME EXPLAIN
As of late, you notice how my art's taking a turn for the worse?
Yeah, I went from drawing like Don Bluth to a generic Disney style to just a slightly better version of my older art.
I'm very disappointed in myself.
So, as of late, I've been practicing offline to make my art better.
I've also drawn a lot of angry vent art which I may or may not post in the future, but it explains better how I feel.
Be warned, it's going to be harsh.
In related news, I'm going to pause on the digital commisions for a while (unless you want a Mini or Headshot/Bust) because I can't do Fullbodies well right now (I'm trying, but I'm not liking the results).
I apologize to the people I owe art to, I'll get to you guys in a while, I'm just so messed up right now.
In other news, my favorite store, Toys R Us is closing and the founder died. Thanks 2018!
WHERE THE HELL AM I SUPPOSED TO SPEND MY 50 BUCKS IN TAX MONEY AT
wait i don't have it yet
In other other news, I'm going to open for traditional art.
I want to see Pan-Pizza at MomoCon and I'm gunna.
So, I need to raise some funds. I also need funds for my fursuit.
I refuse to show my face at a furcon. REFUSE. I AM A POODLE, NOT A HUMAN. I AM NOT SHOWING MY HUMAN FACE. HELL NO*
*I am not an otherkin, don't unfollow me
FOR SOME REASON
I draw better on paper than digitally, which no one seems to understand is pretty hard to do with a MOUSE.
If I had a tablet, my art would have been 20% better.
But, noooooooooooooooooooo...
You see that picture of Pierrot with the Don Bluth mouth? I DID THAT WITH A MOUSE AND ONLY A MOUSE.
BUT MY ART SEEMS TO LOOK LIKE SHIT, SO WHO CARES?
Anyway, my traditional art is slightly better and as such, I'm going to charge some muns for it.
At the same time, I'm lowering my digital prices. I can't ask what I want for it. So, I have to get what I CAN for it.
Yay, I'm eating off the value menu tonight! (Lol, I do that anyway)
In other totally good news, my mom passed the test she needed to get her job and she's going to training for two weeks!
I get to stay home and do nothing for two weeks! How fun! I love the fact she's going to make more money than me! Being a starving artist is fun! I'm so happy for her! I love her repeatedly rubbing her job and success in my face and I'm already depressed and hate myself! Thanks Mom!
Sorry for the passive aggressiveness, I'm just very annoyed with myself and my inability to have any use in this world. I can't get a job, I can't socialize for longer then two seconds, I can't make any money off commissions, I can't do anything right. BUT, LET ME PRAISE MY MOM FOR HER NEW JOB, HOORAY!
>Seriously. Don't come on here pitying me. I'm going to feel guilty for you doing so. I'm not doing reverse psychology. I just wanted to vent. But, I'll get to you guy's stuff soon. I just... I'm just so annoyed right now. I was happier when I was first writing this, but the job thing made me mad. Judge me if you want, I don't care. I hate being the only one in this family who hasn't had a job at some point in their life and can't get one. Like I don't feel like a mistake enough.
*archers aim at me*
WAIT!
LET ME EXPLAIN
As of late, you notice how my art's taking a turn for the worse?
Yeah, I went from drawing like Don Bluth to a generic Disney style to just a slightly better version of my older art.
I'm very disappointed in myself.
So, as of late, I've been practicing offline to make my art better.
I've also drawn a lot of angry vent art which I may or may not post in the future, but it explains better how I feel.
Be warned, it's going to be harsh.
In related news, I'm going to pause on the digital commisions for a while (unless you want a Mini or Headshot/Bust) because I can't do Fullbodies well right now (I'm trying, but I'm not liking the results).
I apologize to the people I owe art to, I'll get to you guys in a while, I'm just so messed up right now.
In other news, my favorite store, Toys R Us is closing and the founder died. Thanks 2018!
WHERE THE HELL AM I SUPPOSED TO SPEND MY 50 BUCKS IN TAX MONEY AT
wait i don't have it yet
In other other news, I'm going to open for traditional art.
I want to see Pan-Pizza at MomoCon and I'm gunna.
So, I need to raise some funds. I also need funds for my fursuit.
I refuse to show my face at a furcon. REFUSE. I AM A POODLE, NOT A HUMAN. I AM NOT SHOWING MY HUMAN FACE. HELL NO*
*I am not an otherkin, don't unfollow me
FOR SOME REASON
I draw better on paper than digitally, which no one seems to understand is pretty hard to do with a MOUSE.
If I had a tablet, my art would have been 20% better.
But, noooooooooooooooooooo...
You see that picture of Pierrot with the Don Bluth mouth? I DID THAT WITH A MOUSE AND ONLY A MOUSE.
BUT MY ART SEEMS TO LOOK LIKE SHIT, SO WHO CARES?
Anyway, my traditional art is slightly better and as such, I'm going to charge some muns for it.
At the same time, I'm lowering my digital prices. I can't ask what I want for it. So, I have to get what I CAN for it.
Yay, I'm eating off the value menu tonight! (Lol, I do that anyway)
In other totally good news, my mom passed the test she needed to get her job and she's going to training for two weeks!
I get to stay home and do nothing for two weeks! How fun! I love the fact she's going to make more money than me! Being a starving artist is fun! I'm so happy for her! I love her repeatedly rubbing her job and success in my face and I'm already depressed and hate myself! Thanks Mom!
Sorry for the passive aggressiveness, I'm just very annoyed with myself and my inability to have any use in this world. I can't get a job, I can't socialize for longer then two seconds, I can't make any money off commissions, I can't do anything right. BUT, LET ME PRAISE MY MOM FOR HER NEW JOB, HOORAY!
>Seriously. Don't come on here pitying me. I'm going to feel guilty for you doing so. I'm not doing reverse psychology. I just wanted to vent. But, I'll get to you guy's stuff soon. I just... I'm just so annoyed right now. I was happier when I was first writing this, but the job thing made me mad. Judge me if you want, I don't care. I hate being the only one in this family who hasn't had a job at some point in their life and can't get one. Like I don't feel like a mistake enough.
Raffle Winners!
Posted 8 years agoGAH!
Forgot to announce this!
Our winners for my last raffle EVER are:
pujot and 
hyenaka !
The way I'm handling this is, I want you two to give me four of your characters and I'll randomly assign a type of art to them and I'll draw them as such.
One Mini, One Headshot, One Bust, and One Fullbody!
You can note them to me or comment below! Which ever makes you more comfortable. ^-^
Thank you two for entering!
Forgot to announce this!
Our winners for my last raffle EVER are:
pujot and 
hyenaka ! The way I'm handling this is, I want you two to give me four of your characters and I'll randomly assign a type of art to them and I'll draw them as such.
One Mini, One Headshot, One Bust, and One Fullbody!
You can note them to me or comment below! Which ever makes you more comfortable. ^-^
Thank you two for entering!
URGENT POKEMON SU/MO FAVOR TO ASK
Posted 8 years agoCan someone please hold my Shiny Silvally, please?
I need to register him TODAY.
The code is expiring at 12 midnight, so if you can get on immediately and save him for me, that would be great.
If you're able to name him, something like "Graphite" or "Sylvester" something related to silvery colors will suffice.
PLEASE.
I'll come back as soon as possible to retrieve him.
If need be, I'll give you art for this.
Warning: DO NOT OFFER IF YOU PLAN TO KEEP THEM.
I don't want any thieves.
I need to register him TODAY.
The code is expiring at 12 midnight, so if you can get on immediately and save him for me, that would be great.
If you're able to name him, something like "Graphite" or "Sylvester" something related to silvery colors will suffice.
PLEASE.
I'll come back as soon as possible to retrieve him.
If need be, I'll give you art for this.
Warning: DO NOT OFFER IF YOU PLAN TO KEEP THEM.
I don't want any thieves.
REMINDER!
Posted 8 years agoI'm going to be gone for two days or more. I'll be back to respond to whoever I need to in a bit.
Secondly, my commissions are open and I have a Valentine's Day-themed sale going on! Check it out or spread the word! https://www.furaffinity.net/view/26294243/
Thirdly, my raffle is open and you have until the 12th to enter! You best hurry, y'all! https://www.furaffinity.net/journal/8615319/
Fourth, Pierrot is a good boy
Secondly, my commissions are open and I have a Valentine's Day-themed sale going on! Check it out or spread the word! https://www.furaffinity.net/view/26294243/
Thirdly, my raffle is open and you have until the 12th to enter! You best hurry, y'all! https://www.furaffinity.net/journal/8615319/
Fourth, Pierrot is a good boy
Official Raffle Entry Spot
Posted 8 years agoEveryone wasn't aware that the "Rules" journal was for entering. XD
So, I'll redoing it here.
Here's the rules to clarify: https://www.furaffinity.net/journal/8609958/
Already entered:
1. Pujot - #1
2. HyenaKa - #2
3.
4.
5.
6.
7.
8.
9.
10.
So, I'll redoing it here.
Here's the rules to clarify: https://www.furaffinity.net/journal/8609958/
Already entered:
1. Pujot - #1
2. HyenaKa - #2
3.
4.
5.
6.
7.
8.
9.
10.
Commissions List
Posted 8 years agoThis is just to keep things nice and tidy.
There's a sale going on right now: https://www.furaffinity.net/view/26294243/
Doodles:
(Singles)
1.
2.
3.
4.
5.
6.
7.
(Couples)
1.
2.
[Extra Valentine's Day slots]
3.
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7.
Minis
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There's a sale going on right now: https://www.furaffinity.net/view/26294243/
Doodles:
(Singles)
1.
2.
3.
4.
5.
6.
7.
(Couples)
1.
2.
[Extra Valentine's Day slots]
3.
4.
5.
6.
7.
Minis
1.
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5.
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EAGLES WOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOON
Posted 8 years agoToday is a good day for a furry who likes both Eagles and green.
My chosen team WON!
YES YES YEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEES
Now, I want to see the Border Bowl.
HAHAHA
SUCK IT TOM BRADY
I need to draw something hilariously gloaty for this.
Especially for the ones who bet AGAINST the Eagles... >:3 *looks at Di and Ben evilly*
Di: O_O
Ben: Nope NopeNopeNopeNopeNOPE. Anything that CLOWN does is going to be BEYOND torturous. *hops out window*
Pierrot: Aren't we two stories up?
Di: He's a cat, he'll be okay.
Ben: *distant* I am NOT okay!
Di: ... He'll be fine.
My chosen team WON!
YES YES YEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEES
Now, I want to see the Border Bowl.
HAHAHA
SUCK IT TOM BRADY
I need to draw something hilariously gloaty for this.
Especially for the ones who bet AGAINST the Eagles... >:3 *looks at Di and Ben evilly*
Di: O_O
Ben: Nope NopeNopeNopeNopeNOPE. Anything that CLOWN does is going to be BEYOND torturous. *hops out window*
Pierrot: Aren't we two stories up?
Di: He's a cat, he'll be okay.
Ben: *distant* I am NOT okay!
Di: ... He'll be fine.
Rigbybestie's Raffle Rules!
Posted 8 years agoOkay, guys. This is important. If you won't be able to commission me in the future, I urge you to join this now.
This is the last time I'm doing a raffle for free art and as such, I'm going out with a bang! (I want to specify that I don't mean that I want to die. I know speaking stuff out into the Universe usually goes badly for me.)
So, I'm being very nice. At first, I was only going to have six winners (two Doodles and four Minis), but I'm deciding to go BIGGER.
Now, I'm offering 3 Doodles! BAM! 3 Headshots! BOOM! 3 Busts! WHOA! And, 3 Minis! OH SHHHHHIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIII
So, I feel like more people get a chance to win!
Here's the rules:
1. One piece of art per winner. If you're picked twice, the dice will be re-rolled, if you get my drift. It's not right for someone to get two while someone else gets none.
2. No need to make advertising journals. This is a raffle for my watchers who are watching me BEFORE this journal was posted. Any new watchers are exempt from this. I know who came after, don't try and trick me, new watchers... >.>
3. Just comment with anything and so I know you read all of these rules and for the password, comment with a your favorite weird combination of food (mine would be a good ol' grilled cheese and grape jelly sandwich, mm-MM!). (If you don't have a favorite, just make one up, I don't care. XD)
4. After you comment, I will assign a number.
5. This will last for a week. You have until this day (February 5th) until the seventh day of this "week" (February 12th) to enter. If you enter on the eighth day (February 13th), you'll be disqualified.
6. The eighth day will be the random generation day. If you win, I want you to note me with your ref sheet. Please make sure to check my Commission page for what I can and can't draw, so I don't turn you down. If you're unsure of what I can draw, feel free to ask! But, I may say no. Feel free to ask me to draw from a list of characters, which may make it easier for me. You have a week to respond. If you don't, I'll re-roll again.
7. Go!
This is the last time I'm doing a raffle for free art and as such, I'm going out with a bang! (I want to specify that I don't mean that I want to die. I know speaking stuff out into the Universe usually goes badly for me.)
So, I'm being very nice. At first, I was only going to have six winners (two Doodles and four Minis), but I'm deciding to go BIGGER.
Now, I'm offering 3 Doodles! BAM! 3 Headshots! BOOM! 3 Busts! WHOA! And, 3 Minis! OH SHHHHHIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIII
So, I feel like more people get a chance to win!
Here's the rules:
1. One piece of art per winner. If you're picked twice, the dice will be re-rolled, if you get my drift. It's not right for someone to get two while someone else gets none.
2. No need to make advertising journals. This is a raffle for my watchers who are watching me BEFORE this journal was posted. Any new watchers are exempt from this. I know who came after, don't try and trick me, new watchers... >.>
3. Just comment with anything and so I know you read all of these rules and for the password, comment with a your favorite weird combination of food (mine would be a good ol' grilled cheese and grape jelly sandwich, mm-MM!). (If you don't have a favorite, just make one up, I don't care. XD)
4. After you comment, I will assign a number.
5. This will last for a week. You have until this day (February 5th) until the seventh day of this "week" (February 12th) to enter. If you enter on the eighth day (February 13th), you'll be disqualified.
6. The eighth day will be the random generation day. If you win, I want you to note me with your ref sheet. Please make sure to check my Commission page for what I can and can't draw, so I don't turn you down. If you're unsure of what I can draw, feel free to ask! But, I may say no. Feel free to ask me to draw from a list of characters, which may make it easier for me. You have a week to respond. If you don't, I'll re-roll again.
7. Go!
Happy Year of the Dog!
Posted 8 years agoYeah, I ddin't know it was year of the dog! I've been WAITING for this! 90% of the cast of When The Fur Flies are dogs! You know what THAT means?
DOG ART ALL YEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAR
Secondly, celebrating the Year of the Dog: Pierrot has an account now! I'm glad I waited! :D https://www.furaffinity.net/user/pierrotthepoodle/
I'll post stuff on there and update the profile more when I'm not feeling sick.
I'm also running low on time, so I have no time for that now. XD
I'm considering making one for Belle in the future, but I need to make sure she's going to work out fine.
Going on NINE MONTHS, BABY!
Thirdly, next journal will be the rules for the raffle. I'm not feeling good right now, having just dealt with... that thing... and I'm not ready to start yet. I wasn't able to finish anything these last few days because of... that thing... and I'm very upset. I also didn't get to upload anything for the last day (I could get online) of last year. I NEED MY WI-FI BACK
(I kinda also didn't care because I don't care about New Year's, but that stupid peer pressure about it being one of the most overblown holidays made me feel guilty. It's just the year turning over, calm your tits)
Instead, we should be celebrating it's Year of the Dog. That is MORE important.
I'mma post the old stuff now, but yeah...
I'm annoyed I didn't make that dealine...
I also didn't finish the New Year's pic. But, since I have a theme now...
Oh no, I got stuff I gotta finish from 2016... That means it's been THREE YEARS since I got it completed. WHO THE HECK TAKES THREE YEARS TO COMPLETE A PICTURE?!
DOG ART ALL YEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAR
Secondly, celebrating the Year of the Dog: Pierrot has an account now! I'm glad I waited! :D https://www.furaffinity.net/user/pierrotthepoodle/
I'll post stuff on there and update the profile more when I'm not feeling sick.
I'm also running low on time, so I have no time for that now. XD
I'm considering making one for Belle in the future, but I need to make sure she's going to work out fine.
Going on NINE MONTHS, BABY!
Thirdly, next journal will be the rules for the raffle. I'm not feeling good right now, having just dealt with... that thing... and I'm not ready to start yet. I wasn't able to finish anything these last few days because of... that thing... and I'm very upset. I also didn't get to upload anything for the last day (I could get online) of last year. I NEED MY WI-FI BACK
(I kinda also didn't care because I don't care about New Year's, but that stupid peer pressure about it being one of the most overblown holidays made me feel guilty. It's just the year turning over, calm your tits)
Instead, we should be celebrating it's Year of the Dog. That is MORE important.
I'mma post the old stuff now, but yeah...
I'm annoyed I didn't make that dealine...
I also didn't finish the New Year's pic. But, since I have a theme now...
Oh no, I got stuff I gotta finish from 2016... That means it's been THREE YEARS since I got it completed. WHO THE HECK TAKES THREE YEARS TO COMPLETE A PICTURE?!
Happy New Year, Everyone!
Posted 8 years agoI have a ton of news!
I hit the 100 watcher mark BEFORE 2018, so I'm awesome! Someone owes me some money at home...
In other news, I'm going to set up the raffle next year, as I need to time to prepare. Now this time, I WANT MORE THAN TWO PEOPLE ENTERING OR IT'S CANCELLED, GOT IT?
I have to finish other work first, so I'll be busy over these two days.
I should set it up around January 3-5th. I'm not sure as of now. It depends on the circumstances.
Next, I just found out that MomoCon is going to have NOT ONLY MERCY'S VOICE ACTOR, BUT FUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUU-REAKING PAN-FREAKING-PIZZA THERE, TOO!!! OH MY GOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO
So, you know I'm going to be there.
See ya, losers!
...
*sticks thumb out*
(You guys aren't losers, I'm joking.)
I wanna go as Alucard, but my face is so... ugly.
And, I don't want anyone to see my face. At all.
So, I want to step it up a notch: Alucard. As a cat. Not just any cat! BEN!
He'll be... BENUCARD!
...
welp getting sued for that one definitely
(okay i did that on purpose)
ALUCAT!
yeah
Seriously though, it's such a great idea!
I don't have to show my face and I'll look cute, while being both original and unoriginal at the same time! :D
...I need a fursuit head, though.
*looks up orange tabby heads I can fool around with*
Okay, that was a bust.
...
*looks up fursuit makers* *looks in wallet; moth flies out* shoot
*decides to make my own* *making heads is hard; money was wasted*
...
MY UGLY FACE IT IS! :D
(Seriously, who can I find who can make a semi-complicated head, with LED eyes, and a tail, and paws, WITHIN FIVE MONTHS?!)
(WHO I ASK, WHO?!)
But, yeah...
I'm going to be gone for a bit.
I'll be back after the New Year, as I'm unable to go to my source of internet for a while.
So, hopefully the 2nd or 3rd.
I'll see you guys around and I hope you all have a wonderful holiday! ^-^
I'M GETTING ABSOLUTELY SMASHED!
...off sparkling grape juice.
I hit the 100 watcher mark BEFORE 2018, so I'm awesome! Someone owes me some money at home...
In other news, I'm going to set up the raffle next year, as I need to time to prepare. Now this time, I WANT MORE THAN TWO PEOPLE ENTERING OR IT'S CANCELLED, GOT IT?
I have to finish other work first, so I'll be busy over these two days.
I should set it up around January 3-5th. I'm not sure as of now. It depends on the circumstances.
Next, I just found out that MomoCon is going to have NOT ONLY MERCY'S VOICE ACTOR, BUT FUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUU-REAKING PAN-FREAKING-PIZZA THERE, TOO!!! OH MY GOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO
So, you know I'm going to be there.
See ya, losers!
...
*sticks thumb out*
(You guys aren't losers, I'm joking.)
I wanna go as Alucard, but my face is so... ugly.
And, I don't want anyone to see my face. At all.
So, I want to step it up a notch: Alucard. As a cat. Not just any cat! BEN!
He'll be... BENUCARD!
...
welp getting sued for that one definitely
(okay i did that on purpose)
ALUCAT!
yeah
Seriously though, it's such a great idea!
I don't have to show my face and I'll look cute, while being both original and unoriginal at the same time! :D
...I need a fursuit head, though.
*looks up orange tabby heads I can fool around with*
Okay, that was a bust.
...
*looks up fursuit makers* *looks in wallet; moth flies out* shoot
*decides to make my own* *making heads is hard; money was wasted*
...
MY UGLY FACE IT IS! :D
(Seriously, who can I find who can make a semi-complicated head, with LED eyes, and a tail, and paws, WITHIN FIVE MONTHS?!)
(WHO I ASK, WHO?!)
But, yeah...
I'm going to be gone for a bit.
I'll be back after the New Year, as I'm unable to go to my source of internet for a while.
So, hopefully the 2nd or 3rd.
I'll see you guys around and I hope you all have a wonderful holiday! ^-^
I'M GETTING ABSOLUTELY SMASHED!
...off sparkling grape juice.
Happy Winter Solstice Everyone!
Posted 8 years agoI overstayed my welcome at the Kroc and I can see by the look on my mom's face and the angry security guard, it's time to go.
I just wanted to say, in the case of me not returning on Saturday, that I hope you all have a wonderful Christmas/Hanukkah/Boxing Day/Kwanzaa, whatever you celebrate!
Also, I meant to have a cute pic for today and Christmas on time, but I got caught up with Belle and such. So, they'll be finished AFTER Christmas.
I hope I don't get stabbed on the way home! :-D
(Seriously)
In other news, I'm tapped out for today and figure out how to respond to folks, so I'll get back to you guys when I'm not tired... sorry...
Happy Holidays!
I just wanted to say, in the case of me not returning on Saturday, that I hope you all have a wonderful Christmas/Hanukkah/Boxing Day/Kwanzaa, whatever you celebrate!
Also, I meant to have a cute pic for today and Christmas on time, but I got caught up with Belle and such. So, they'll be finished AFTER Christmas.
I hope I don't get stabbed on the way home! :-D
(Seriously)
In other news, I'm tapped out for today and figure out how to respond to folks, so I'll get back to you guys when I'm not tired... sorry...
Happy Holidays!
OH GOSH GUYS
Posted 8 years agoFor one, why are people following me? Why are you voluntarily looking at my trash?
Seriously, though!
Thank you all for your patronage and it's gotten me a lot farther than I would have without you. Thank you all.
I'm finishing more work more frequently, my mood has improved, my art has improved, I feel so much better now...
I have people who want to see my work and see me go farther.
I have a reason to keep going and continue making my work better.
I can explore new ideas, worlds, the possibilities are endless!
So, once again, I'm offering a watcher raffle once I hit 100 watchers.
I'm almost there and I'm so proud...
This is amazeballs holy crap.
(I'll do the full announcement for that next year, when I assume I'll finally hit that.)
(I also promise not to take 500 years like the last one. Sorry CrazyGameGuy)
Thank you for your time! ^-^
(I'll be off now, I have to search for Puff the Poodle! *dons safari hat*)
Seriously, though!
Thank you all for your patronage and it's gotten me a lot farther than I would have without you. Thank you all.
I'm finishing more work more frequently, my mood has improved, my art has improved, I feel so much better now...
I have people who want to see my work and see me go farther.
I have a reason to keep going and continue making my work better.
I can explore new ideas, worlds, the possibilities are endless!
So, once again, I'm offering a watcher raffle once I hit 100 watchers.
I'm almost there and I'm so proud...
This is amazeballs holy crap.
(I'll do the full announcement for that next year, when I assume I'll finally hit that.)
(I also promise not to take 500 years like the last one. Sorry CrazyGameGuy)
Thank you for your time! ^-^
(I'll be off now, I have to search for Puff the Poodle! *dons safari hat*)
THIS IS SERIOUS BUSINESS, FOLKS
Posted 8 years agoOkay, you see my new avatar?
Good.
I need that Poodle in it.
That Poodle is exclusive to Dollar Trees all over the Continental US.
I need that Poodle BADLY.
We only went to 2 of the 6 Dollar Trees here and couldn't find them. :(
I assume they're probably sold out EVERYWHERE here.
(Other people and item shortages get on my nerves SO BADLY... No one likes Poodles this much NORMALLY!)
(Sorry, I'm really salty about this.)
If you have one, please, please, please...
I NEED THEM.
Now, I'm short on cash, so you'll have to boot the S&H. (Unless there's some way to ship for free, that I don't know about.)
In return, I'm offering, not 1, not 2, but 3 drawings in return.
I am DISTRAUGHT. I thought I would just get over them, but I can't.
Please help me get this precious pink child.
Thank you all for your time.
Good.
I need that Poodle in it.
That Poodle is exclusive to Dollar Trees all over the Continental US.
I need that Poodle BADLY.
We only went to 2 of the 6 Dollar Trees here and couldn't find them. :(
I assume they're probably sold out EVERYWHERE here.
(Other people and item shortages get on my nerves SO BADLY... No one likes Poodles this much NORMALLY!)
(Sorry, I'm really salty about this.)
If you have one, please, please, please...
I NEED THEM.
Now, I'm short on cash, so you'll have to boot the S&H. (Unless there's some way to ship for free, that I don't know about.)
In return, I'm offering, not 1, not 2, but 3 drawings in return.
I am DISTRAUGHT. I thought I would just get over them, but I can't.
Please help me get this precious pink child.
Thank you all for your time.
Alright Guys, Show's Over
Posted 8 years agoNet neutrality is over and because I can't afford the internet, this is it, man.
(Now I'm going to have Fight For The Future e-mailing forever for nothing. ><)
Had a lot of stuff planned (as you could see from the WIP thing) but that's over now.
I'll try to come on, but if I can't enter the site until this crap is over, this may be the last couple of months you see me.
Thanks a lot, fucking Comcast, FCC, Republicans, and everyone else involved in this fiasco.
You can all bite me.
Love you guys on here. Gonna miss ya.
(Now I'm going to have Fight For The Future e-mailing forever for nothing. ><)
Had a lot of stuff planned (as you could see from the WIP thing) but that's over now.
I'll try to come on, but if I can't enter the site until this crap is over, this may be the last couple of months you see me.
Thanks a lot, fucking Comcast, FCC, Republicans, and everyone else involved in this fiasco.
You can all bite me.
Love you guys on here. Gonna miss ya.
Happy Turkey Day, Everyone!
Posted 8 years agoI... uh... kinda regret wasting time on that doodle... no one liked it.
(NOT GUILT-TRIPPING ANYONE, JUST SAYING!)
The problem is that is was supposed to be the follow-up to a picture of Pierrot hugging a turkey/falling in love with said turkey (PLATONICALLY) and he "pardoned" said turkey from being eaten.
...Di didn't listen.
...jerk.
I should have made the first one, now it's a jumbled mess. Whoops
It was 5 AM, so I wasn't functioning to full capacity.
Anyway, I'm going to be absent from this account for a while. The Kroc is closed on Thursday and Black Friday, so I'll be back on Saturday!
We're not going to have a traditional Thanksgiving this year, honestly because it's too expensive and none of us can get together like normal.
My family is in shambles. It's a cesspool of madness
Oh yeah, this was about me wishing you all a Happy Thanksgiving!
HAPPY THA-- *240 Character Limit*
(NOT GUILT-TRIPPING ANYONE, JUST SAYING!)
The problem is that is was supposed to be the follow-up to a picture of Pierrot hugging a turkey/falling in love with said turkey (PLATONICALLY) and he "pardoned" said turkey from being eaten.
...Di didn't listen.
...jerk.
I should have made the first one, now it's a jumbled mess. Whoops
It was 5 AM, so I wasn't functioning to full capacity.
Anyway, I'm going to be absent from this account for a while. The Kroc is closed on Thursday and Black Friday, so I'll be back on Saturday!
We're not going to have a traditional Thanksgiving this year, honestly because it's too expensive and none of us can get together like normal.
My family is in shambles. It's a cesspool of madness
Oh yeah, this was about me wishing you all a Happy Thanksgiving!
HAPPY THA-- *240 Character Limit*
This Has Been A Fun Year For Me
Posted 8 years agoOkay, now that I'm feeling better, I'm starting more work.
I just got word that our storage unit is now "scheduled for auction" because my slacker aunt didn't pay for it for TWO MONTHS.
And, before you ask, she makes WELL over enough to pay for it. And, before you say the other thing, she co-owns. So, we're not trying to mooch off of her or anything. It was her turn to pay and look at what she did.
I'm so annoyed that I trusted my mom over this. My stuffies and surplus DVDs, books, toys, and clothes are in there.
We have to depend on my OTHER aunt, who I strongly dislike, for money, who's a huge Illuminati nut, who believes something "big" is going to happen today to Monday, so she doesn't want to leave the house all day. She really gets on my nerves with her nonsense...
I don't want to lose my babies or my stuff over this.
I have NO ONE to go to.
I can't even raise enough money from commissions in enough time!
They're all doomed, to go to some creep's house, who'll do who-knows-WHAT with them.
(Before it's said, no, EVERYONE in the world isn't a creep, but my luck would be that's where they're going.)
I'm so frustrated and upset right now...
I just want to SCREAM.
I want to break in there and get everyone out, but my luck, I'd get arrested for that, while no one else would.
I just can't win...
I'll never trust anyone with my family like that again. Never freaking again.
If we somehow pay that unit off, I'm barging RIGHT IN THERE and taking everyone out.
I don't care if I don't have the room for them. This is RIDICULOUS.
What makes me more mad is that my mom thinks it's okay to tease me about not putting anyone in there.
I had a feeling this wasn't going to work out for long.
I wanted to get them back, as I KNEW my aunt wouldn't pay.
Now I got two useless aunts who won't pay. What the f*ck am I supposed to do?
"You don't want to put anyone in there XD"
THAT'S BECAUSE NONE OF Y'ALL CAN PAY AND CAN'T KEEP YOUR WORD
I'm going to be miserable until this situation is sorted out.
I'll drag my other aunt out of her apartment, if I need to.
I absolutely REFUSE to let this happen.
REFUSE
(Before you call the cops, she has a gun and would shoot me, if I attempted to do this, also she's heavy as heck. I wouldn't ACTUALLY do it. But, BOY DO I WANT TO RIGHT NOW)
I just got word that our storage unit is now "scheduled for auction" because my slacker aunt didn't pay for it for TWO MONTHS.
And, before you ask, she makes WELL over enough to pay for it. And, before you say the other thing, she co-owns. So, we're not trying to mooch off of her or anything. It was her turn to pay and look at what she did.
I'm so annoyed that I trusted my mom over this. My stuffies and surplus DVDs, books, toys, and clothes are in there.
We have to depend on my OTHER aunt, who I strongly dislike, for money, who's a huge Illuminati nut, who believes something "big" is going to happen today to Monday, so she doesn't want to leave the house all day. She really gets on my nerves with her nonsense...
I don't want to lose my babies or my stuff over this.
I have NO ONE to go to.
I can't even raise enough money from commissions in enough time!
They're all doomed, to go to some creep's house, who'll do who-knows-WHAT with them.
(Before it's said, no, EVERYONE in the world isn't a creep, but my luck would be that's where they're going.)
I'm so frustrated and upset right now...
I just want to SCREAM.
I want to break in there and get everyone out, but my luck, I'd get arrested for that, while no one else would.
I just can't win...
I'll never trust anyone with my family like that again. Never freaking again.
If we somehow pay that unit off, I'm barging RIGHT IN THERE and taking everyone out.
I don't care if I don't have the room for them. This is RIDICULOUS.
What makes me more mad is that my mom thinks it's okay to tease me about not putting anyone in there.
I had a feeling this wasn't going to work out for long.
I wanted to get them back, as I KNEW my aunt wouldn't pay.
Now I got two useless aunts who won't pay. What the f*ck am I supposed to do?
"You don't want to put anyone in there XD"
THAT'S BECAUSE NONE OF Y'ALL CAN PAY AND CAN'T KEEP YOUR WORD
I'm going to be miserable until this situation is sorted out.
I'll drag my other aunt out of her apartment, if I need to.
I absolutely REFUSE to let this happen.
REFUSE
(Before you call the cops, she has a gun and would shoot me, if I attempted to do this, also she's heavy as heck. I wouldn't ACTUALLY do it. But, BOY DO I WANT TO RIGHT NOW)
Sigh... Delays again...
Posted 8 years agoThis month has been one kick in the lady-balls to another.
Earlier with the... you know.
Later with my depression kicking in.
Again with one of my requests. THE BACKGROUND WAS WHITE. I DON'T KNOW HOW THIS HAPPENED. ><
The picture is ultimately ruined. I Magic Tooled everything, but there's white dots EVERYWHERE
Now, I have to do more work to cover it up. I'm so freaking angry.
I don't know where to get started on the other one. I suck at posing sometimes.
And, now with me possibly having incoming arthritis or carpal tunnel. THE MONTH I WANTED TO DRAW MORE
I also don't have any cost-effective/time-saving coloring techniques.
My hand cramps writing this journal.
But, I'm not going to let that stop me.
I'm going to have to slow down a bit.
Again, I apologize for all of the delays and excuses and explaining.
I've been nothing but a jerkass this whole month.
I understand if you're upset with me.
I hate myself for this. But, I'm not going to let myself get down again.
I suck. I know suck. But, I'm going to be better. I'll power through this.
I'm not letting anything stop me! I REFUSE! NOT A CRAMPING WRIST. NOT DEPRESSION. NOT HAVING NO INTERNET.
NOTHING IS GOING TO STOP ME
All I'm trying to do is get better and get to the top! And, I will one day!
...
Sorry, I just saw Pan-Pizza's Motivation video and I got hyped at the end.
I'm very serious though.
I may take more frequent breaks, just to not get anything serious, but I definitely finish everyone's stuff.
I won't say soon, because that sets up expectations I can't hit anymore.
Btw, Di and Teal's birthday art will be finished hopefully by the 31st.
I couldn't do ANYTHING on the 22nd, as I had SERIOUS wrist cramps that day and I was worried that I might eff up my arm more if I finished it. I also assumed that I may had to go to the hospital, had it gotten worse.
I also was trying to finish owed work, but...
I believe it because of me spam-saving things at the Kroc Center. (I sometimes don't come back for days and I need any possible references I could use.)
I knew this was going to happen after a while.
I never give myself a break. I go immediately home and sort things. No rest for the weary, I see.
I brought this on myself and I have to fix it myself.
Earlier with the... you know.
Later with my depression kicking in.
Again with one of my requests. THE BACKGROUND WAS WHITE. I DON'T KNOW HOW THIS HAPPENED. ><
The picture is ultimately ruined. I Magic Tooled everything, but there's white dots EVERYWHERE
Now, I have to do more work to cover it up. I'm so freaking angry.
I don't know where to get started on the other one. I suck at posing sometimes.
And, now with me possibly having incoming arthritis or carpal tunnel. THE MONTH I WANTED TO DRAW MORE
I also don't have any cost-effective/time-saving coloring techniques.
My hand cramps writing this journal.
But, I'm not going to let that stop me.
I'm going to have to slow down a bit.
Again, I apologize for all of the delays and excuses and explaining.
I've been nothing but a jerkass this whole month.
I understand if you're upset with me.
I hate myself for this. But, I'm not going to let myself get down again.
I suck. I know suck. But, I'm going to be better. I'll power through this.
I'm not letting anything stop me! I REFUSE! NOT A CRAMPING WRIST. NOT DEPRESSION. NOT HAVING NO INTERNET.
NOTHING IS GOING TO STOP ME
All I'm trying to do is get better and get to the top! And, I will one day!
...
Sorry, I just saw Pan-Pizza's Motivation video and I got hyped at the end.
I'm very serious though.
I may take more frequent breaks, just to not get anything serious, but I definitely finish everyone's stuff.
I won't say soon, because that sets up expectations I can't hit anymore.
Btw, Di and Teal's birthday art will be finished hopefully by the 31st.
I couldn't do ANYTHING on the 22nd, as I had SERIOUS wrist cramps that day and I was worried that I might eff up my arm more if I finished it. I also assumed that I may had to go to the hospital, had it gotten worse.
I also was trying to finish owed work, but...
I believe it because of me spam-saving things at the Kroc Center. (I sometimes don't come back for days and I need any possible references I could use.)
I knew this was going to happen after a while.
I never give myself a break. I go immediately home and sort things. No rest for the weary, I see.
I brought this on myself and I have to fix it myself.
Hey Hey, It'll Be Someone's Birthday!
Posted 8 years ago...okay, not mine. I already had mine.
*slides box over* ...though late birthday presents would be nice...
jkjkjkjkjkdon'thatemeplease
The twins are turning 31 on the 23th! :D
Yes, I made a journal over two fictional characters.
Don't judge me
They're turning 31 in October, so you know what this means, right?
HALLOWEEN THEMED PARTY!
I was thinking something with... GHOSTS
Teal: YES!
Di: NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!
Me: YEEES! *puts on Halloween birthday outfit*
Di: Warum ich?
(Teal loves ghosts, while Di's afraid of them. Have fun with that. >:3)
(No, wait, I'm not begging for art! I'm just saying. XD)
(I need to figure out how I'm going to draw and color that in within one day whoops)
*slides box over* ...though late birthday presents would be nice...
jkjkjkjkjkdon'thatemeplease
The twins are turning 31 on the 23th! :D
Yes, I made a journal over two fictional characters.
Don't judge me
They're turning 31 in October, so you know what this means, right?
HALLOWEEN THEMED PARTY!
I was thinking something with... GHOSTS
Teal: YES!
Di: NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!
Me: YEEES! *puts on Halloween birthday outfit*
Di: Warum ich?
(Teal loves ghosts, while Di's afraid of them. Have fun with that. >:3)
(No, wait, I'm not begging for art! I'm just saying. XD)
(I need to figure out how I'm going to draw and color that in within one day whoops)
Hey, uh, Serious Talk
Posted 8 years ago(Warning: This is very upsetting at parts. Don't read it if it'll ruin your mood. I hate being an arse and ruining people's happiness.)
I don't like bringing up my personal feelings often, because I feel like I'm being an attention whore, but I have to say this for clarity.
I've gotten so depressed I'm having a hard time finishing work and the stuff that's been going on in my household lately isn't helping.
I need my Wi-Fi to work and without it, I feel like an empty shell. I sit in my room for long periods of time or stand around, pacing back and forth, talking about various things, as I'm so distracted and physically drained from doing any form of long physical work (i.e. finishing work, chores, etc.)
I'm not trying to sound like a spoiled child, but I need my internet. It kept me working. I'm very annoyed and disappointed that my only family member with constant internet uses it to spoil her mind with silly conspiracy theories and other nonsense.
I've taken WAY too long to finish people's commissions, requests, and gift art. It takes me a day (appro. anywhere from 3-8 hours) at the most to draw and color them in (I've done it before, so I know) and I've spent DAYS without finishing anything. I believe this is due to the fact I'm up at a time at which I can't work (daytime) and I feel drained doing work at this time, because there's too many distractions (my mother constantly pestering over something trivial, can distract me for HOURS). I work very efficiently in the graveyard hours of the morning, especially when I'm exhausted. Being up at this time is problematic and I'm not sure why outside of the reason I stated above. I know my mom doesn't mean any harm, but I keep telling her not to bother me and she does it anyway and it's very frustrating. I can't work in my room, as I have no space for it. I have no choice but the be downstairs around her in the daytime, so I can go to the Kroc Center, which I despise doing, to use the internet for a FRACTION of the time I normally need online. The internet is my life, basically. I need it for everything, basically and without it, I just can't function. I have no one I can go to for this, before it's suggested. I have no insurance right now and can't go to a doctor/dentist/anyone. I'm waiting for it to come back, but it looks unlikely. I might need medicine to balance out my mood and energy, but this isn't normal.
In other news, I fear my health, for multiple reasons and I'm trying to push myself to work, but I can't work. It's a constant push and pull with myself. I want to finish people's work just in case. I'm trying to get help, but my other half of the family can't seem to cooperate with me and I assume the worse. I try not to think about it, because the pain and headaches I receive from it keep reminding me. I'm not sure of some of the pain is from my depression or what. I know where the headaches are from, though. It often keeps me up at night, where I can't sleep, and that's not helping with my mood in the morning. Then, I have to deal with "YOU WANT TO BE UPSET ALL OF THE TIME" comments. I hate being upset. I want to be happy. But, I can't. I don't know anymore.
It's to the point where I want to give up on art and just lay in my bed all of the time. But, I know I can't, because there's always something I want to draw and I can't disappoint myself and my watchers. I wish I understood my own emotions better, so I could handle them.
I also wish I wasn't such a perfectionist. People get by just fine with sketchy artwork and everyone loves it. I feel the need to have my art be as flawless as possible and because I think that way, I take a lot longer than I should finishing it. I mean, my personal art. For some reason, I draw art for other people BETTER than my own art. I think this also why I'm disappointed in myself at times. I don't know. I'm just very miserable at times and I wish I could be like my younger self again. Having fun drawing stuff for people and they like it and I feel accomplished.
I'm sorry for being so depressing. You can just disregard this whole journal. I just wanted to vent.
I'll push myself to finish stuff, because you guys will like it anyway. I shouldn't care anymore.
In the end, it doesn't matter. My art will be liked when it's first posted, then be old news later anyway.
I guess I'm that way so I'LL like it later?
(Note: I am not thinking of or planning suicide. Don't worry. I know there's more to life than I see right now and I need to wait for it. I've never been to a con, had a dog, eaten schnitzel, etc. etc. It's just I've very physically drained and sad lately. I might just be in a rut. Hopefully, when I get my dog later, I'll feel better. ...oh wait, that'll be in 2018. sh*t)
(Again, this is just a vent. I'm sorry for being a pest. I'm not so happy-go-lucky all of the time... You can ignore this.)
(Please don't be harsh either. I'm not good at articulating my feelings and I probably sound like an ass in this. )
I don't like bringing up my personal feelings often, because I feel like I'm being an attention whore, but I have to say this for clarity.
I've gotten so depressed I'm having a hard time finishing work and the stuff that's been going on in my household lately isn't helping.
I need my Wi-Fi to work and without it, I feel like an empty shell. I sit in my room for long periods of time or stand around, pacing back and forth, talking about various things, as I'm so distracted and physically drained from doing any form of long physical work (i.e. finishing work, chores, etc.)
I'm not trying to sound like a spoiled child, but I need my internet. It kept me working. I'm very annoyed and disappointed that my only family member with constant internet uses it to spoil her mind with silly conspiracy theories and other nonsense.
I've taken WAY too long to finish people's commissions, requests, and gift art. It takes me a day (appro. anywhere from 3-8 hours) at the most to draw and color them in (I've done it before, so I know) and I've spent DAYS without finishing anything. I believe this is due to the fact I'm up at a time at which I can't work (daytime) and I feel drained doing work at this time, because there's too many distractions (my mother constantly pestering over something trivial, can distract me for HOURS). I work very efficiently in the graveyard hours of the morning, especially when I'm exhausted. Being up at this time is problematic and I'm not sure why outside of the reason I stated above. I know my mom doesn't mean any harm, but I keep telling her not to bother me and she does it anyway and it's very frustrating. I can't work in my room, as I have no space for it. I have no choice but the be downstairs around her in the daytime, so I can go to the Kroc Center, which I despise doing, to use the internet for a FRACTION of the time I normally need online. The internet is my life, basically. I need it for everything, basically and without it, I just can't function. I have no one I can go to for this, before it's suggested. I have no insurance right now and can't go to a doctor/dentist/anyone. I'm waiting for it to come back, but it looks unlikely. I might need medicine to balance out my mood and energy, but this isn't normal.
In other news, I fear my health, for multiple reasons and I'm trying to push myself to work, but I can't work. It's a constant push and pull with myself. I want to finish people's work just in case. I'm trying to get help, but my other half of the family can't seem to cooperate with me and I assume the worse. I try not to think about it, because the pain and headaches I receive from it keep reminding me. I'm not sure of some of the pain is from my depression or what. I know where the headaches are from, though. It often keeps me up at night, where I can't sleep, and that's not helping with my mood in the morning. Then, I have to deal with "YOU WANT TO BE UPSET ALL OF THE TIME" comments. I hate being upset. I want to be happy. But, I can't. I don't know anymore.
It's to the point where I want to give up on art and just lay in my bed all of the time. But, I know I can't, because there's always something I want to draw and I can't disappoint myself and my watchers. I wish I understood my own emotions better, so I could handle them.
I also wish I wasn't such a perfectionist. People get by just fine with sketchy artwork and everyone loves it. I feel the need to have my art be as flawless as possible and because I think that way, I take a lot longer than I should finishing it. I mean, my personal art. For some reason, I draw art for other people BETTER than my own art. I think this also why I'm disappointed in myself at times. I don't know. I'm just very miserable at times and I wish I could be like my younger self again. Having fun drawing stuff for people and they like it and I feel accomplished.
I'm sorry for being so depressing. You can just disregard this whole journal. I just wanted to vent.
I'll push myself to finish stuff, because you guys will like it anyway. I shouldn't care anymore.
In the end, it doesn't matter. My art will be liked when it's first posted, then be old news later anyway.
I guess I'm that way so I'LL like it later?
(Note: I am not thinking of or planning suicide. Don't worry. I know there's more to life than I see right now and I need to wait for it. I've never been to a con, had a dog, eaten schnitzel, etc. etc. It's just I've very physically drained and sad lately. I might just be in a rut. Hopefully, when I get my dog later, I'll feel better. ...oh wait, that'll be in 2018. sh*t)
(Again, this is just a vent. I'm sorry for being a pest. I'm not so happy-go-lucky all of the time... You can ignore this.)
(Please don't be harsh either. I'm not good at articulating my feelings and I probably sound like an ass in this. )
So, I saw OK K.O., Let's Be Heroes
Posted 8 years ago...
I LOVE THIS SHOW
It's so freaking cute and has some clever jokes in it!
I don't get the people who said it's "very juvenile and for six-year-old babies" and such, it's not like Teen Titans Go!. XD
I love K.O., Lord Boxman, and Enid's Parent's the most. I haven't seen much of it, but the Captain Planet and Enid's Parents episodes got me into the show. (I also love the joke about them still being Wereanimals after that one episode and Puppy!K.O. putting on a humansuit. THAT is hilarious.)
I need to draw Puppy!K.O....
I LOVE THIS SHOW
It's so freaking cute and has some clever jokes in it!
I don't get the people who said it's "very juvenile and for six-year-old babies" and such, it's not like Teen Titans Go!. XD
I love K.O., Lord Boxman, and Enid's Parent's the most. I haven't seen much of it, but the Captain Planet and Enid's Parents episodes got me into the show. (I also love the joke about them still being Wereanimals after that one episode and Puppy!K.O. putting on a humansuit. THAT is hilarious.)
I need to draw Puppy!K.O....
Update w/ Slight Delays
Posted 8 years agoOkay, so here's what's going on now! :D ... D:
Because of... reasons... you know... --> .
I wasn't feeling good last week and couldn't finish a THING.
It was like this time, it was ESPECIALLY WORSE just because I wanted to finish work! D:<
I'm going to try and finish everyone's requests by Monday, Tuesday or Wednesday. I don't want to give myself a definite date, as it stresses me out.
But, since I owe you guys BIG TIME, I'll try my best!
In other news, I'm dropping all of my personal art for something else.
IT'S CARTOON NETWORK'S 25TH BIRTHDAY AND NO ONE F*CKING TOLD ME
When I found out, I downloaded the bumpers and I'm obsessed with the one with the... like trap-ish sounding song in the background.
I. LOVE. THAT. YIFFING. SONG. *puts coin in swear jar*
So, I'll be making colored sketches of all my childhood favorites! ^-^
...and Dexter.
No WIPs, no BS from me. I'm drawing them and finishing them on time, then I'mma dump them when they're finished later.
Afterwards, HALLOWEEN STUFF! :D
But, for now, a pic I wish I post on October 1st and didn't have the time for... :(
Well, it's vaguely Halloween-related, even though I drew it on Halloween Eve (September).
...
How do I end this?
...
*tap dances off-stage*
Because of... reasons... you know... --> .
I wasn't feeling good last week and couldn't finish a THING.
It was like this time, it was ESPECIALLY WORSE just because I wanted to finish work! D:<
I'm going to try and finish everyone's requests by Monday, Tuesday or Wednesday. I don't want to give myself a definite date, as it stresses me out.
But, since I owe you guys BIG TIME, I'll try my best!
In other news, I'm dropping all of my personal art for something else.
IT'S CARTOON NETWORK'S 25TH BIRTHDAY AND NO ONE F*CKING TOLD ME
When I found out, I downloaded the bumpers and I'm obsessed with the one with the... like trap-ish sounding song in the background.
I. LOVE. THAT. YIFFING. SONG. *puts coin in swear jar*
So, I'll be making colored sketches of all my childhood favorites! ^-^
...and Dexter.
No WIPs, no BS from me. I'm drawing them and finishing them on time, then I'mma dump them when they're finished later.
Afterwards, HALLOWEEN STUFF! :D
But, for now, a pic I wish I post on October 1st and didn't have the time for... :(
Well, it's vaguely Halloween-related, even though I drew it on Halloween Eve (September).
...
How do I end this?
...
*tap dances off-stage*
Alright, Slight Changes
Posted 8 years agoI couldn't get the Fluffy art finished, as it's not my current interest at the moment anymore.
I hate having Asperger's... It gets in my way SO MANY F*CKING TIMES
Why people want to pretend to have it, I'll never understand. ><
So, I'm going to finish and upload art I WANT to upload.
That way I don't get burnt out easily.
I sit around wasting time, trying to get myself in the mood to draw and it's not working.
So, I finished something I made just recently before the older art because of how interests shifted.
Then again, it's better SOMETHING get finished, than nothing at all.
By the way, I'm going to work on the requests soon, don't worry! I work impulsively and I'll get to them!
I hate how I can't focus like neurotypical people.
I hate having Asperger's... It gets in my way SO MANY F*CKING TIMES
Why people want to pretend to have it, I'll never understand. ><
So, I'm going to finish and upload art I WANT to upload.
That way I don't get burnt out easily.
I sit around wasting time, trying to get myself in the mood to draw and it's not working.
So, I finished something I made just recently before the older art because of how interests shifted.
Then again, it's better SOMETHING get finished, than nothing at all.
By the way, I'm going to work on the requests soon, don't worry! I work impulsively and I'll get to them!
I hate how I can't focus like neurotypical people.
I'm Actually Finishing Work? PROGRESS
Posted 8 years agoYes, that was a Hellsing Ultimate Abridged reference.
I'm working on things now three to four at a time, to cut through the tremendous queue I have currently.
Sadly, I keep having good ideas, so it adds to the pile... *sighs*
I'm going to finish the Fluffy stuff tonight/tomorrow and upload it asap in the future.
I'm glad I learned to let go and just finish things. I keep wanting to have everything be absolutely perfect first before I even start.
So, everything piles up. I'm glad I can just relax and do things now. I had fun finishing stuff.
In other news, I'm finally feeling more confident in my art style.
I'm very sorry to the request giveaway winners for taking so VERY LONG to get back to them.
I didn't want to say what my issue was. I didn't feel like my old art was "good enough" to give someone. So, I waited and waited and waited until I improved. I didn't want to seem like I forgot or was ignoring you.
I'm sorry for being a douchebag.
falconwolf & 
crazygameguy, comment below with what you want! (Unless you'd rather note me.)
Please within reason, of course. (I'm not trying to be mean or anything, I'm just not able to draw everything...)
If either of you don't comment, because you didn't see this journal by Thursday, I'll note you.
I'm working on things now three to four at a time, to cut through the tremendous queue I have currently.
Sadly, I keep having good ideas, so it adds to the pile... *sighs*
I'm going to finish the Fluffy stuff tonight/tomorrow and upload it asap in the future.
I'm glad I learned to let go and just finish things. I keep wanting to have everything be absolutely perfect first before I even start.
So, everything piles up. I'm glad I can just relax and do things now. I had fun finishing stuff.
In other news, I'm finally feeling more confident in my art style.
I'm very sorry to the request giveaway winners for taking so VERY LONG to get back to them.
I didn't want to say what my issue was. I didn't feel like my old art was "good enough" to give someone. So, I waited and waited and waited until I improved. I didn't want to seem like I forgot or was ignoring you.
I'm sorry for being a douchebag.
falconwolf & 
crazygameguy, comment below with what you want! (Unless you'd rather note me.) Please within reason, of course. (I'm not trying to be mean or anything, I'm just not able to draw everything...)
If either of you don't comment, because you didn't see this journal by Thursday, I'll note you.
What I'm Doing Lately
Posted 8 years agoSo, I know I've been a bit quiet.
This is because I have like 5 different projects going on at once. I am not joking.
Because I have a WONDERFUL mixture of Asperger's, ADHD, and Depression, I have a hard time getting work finished, because of my short attention span and how working makes me drained very fast. I'm trying my best to finish stuff on time, but I'm not doing too well.
Anyway, I already spoiled that I working on stuff with Fluffy from Bunnicula and something new with Di and Ben.
I'm doing something else new, I got enamored with an old childhood show of mine again, so new stuff with that and I'm going to do something ELSE new somewhere else. ;)
So, you can see my plate is full.
I'm trying to work on it all, but my child-like attention span is stopping me. I also hate doing lots of hard work at once, but when it's finished, I love looking at my job well done.
I hope you all will have patience with me and I thank all 81 of you for your patronage. (I mean "watchage".)
In other news, I seem to be getting better at art with all of the practicing I've been doing! I'm feeling much more confident in my art, so I'm finally happy with it for once! (However, I'm probably still going to get lackluster response from the community, so that's another issue I'll have to shrug off later.)
By the way, Pierrot's now 5 months old! :D I just need to last two more months with him and I'll surpass Sonja's record! So far, I love the little dork. He makes me happy when I see him. :) It feels so good having a fursona that fits.
To address two other issues, I'm retiring Sorbet's old design and going to change a few things. I assume that's why no one liked her. XD
Sonja is not being retired. She's just no longer my fursona. She has a whole AU dedicated to her that I can't just erase now. Also, I don't HATE her, unlike another fursona of mine (*coughrigcough*), so if anything, I'm just going to use her in the series, but I'm not mad at her or anything!
I'm too sentimental over all of my characters to get rid of her completely.
My question to you guys, do you like where I'm going with my art lately? Or should I do an updated version of my old style? Like, I mix Don Bluth/Disney aspects into my character's heads/faces and body shapes and I'm trying to be more... "anatomically correct" lately and less cartoony. Is it a good change you guys like, or should I do the older stuff again? (I just really love the fact I can draw open mouths now, like nothing, like I've always wanted to do when I younger... Younger Me would be so proud of me right now... (And, disappointed I'm now such a shy, depressing, annoying idiot. No, wait, that was younger me. *rimshot*))
No pressure and I'm not going to snap at you all for answering. I just want to know your opinions. :)
This is because I have like 5 different projects going on at once. I am not joking.
Because I have a WONDERFUL mixture of Asperger's, ADHD, and Depression, I have a hard time getting work finished, because of my short attention span and how working makes me drained very fast. I'm trying my best to finish stuff on time, but I'm not doing too well.
Anyway, I already spoiled that I working on stuff with Fluffy from Bunnicula and something new with Di and Ben.
I'm doing something else new, I got enamored with an old childhood show of mine again, so new stuff with that and I'm going to do something ELSE new somewhere else. ;)
So, you can see my plate is full.
I'm trying to work on it all, but my child-like attention span is stopping me. I also hate doing lots of hard work at once, but when it's finished, I love looking at my job well done.
I hope you all will have patience with me and I thank all 81 of you for your patronage. (I mean "watchage".)
In other news, I seem to be getting better at art with all of the practicing I've been doing! I'm feeling much more confident in my art, so I'm finally happy with it for once! (However, I'm probably still going to get lackluster response from the community, so that's another issue I'll have to shrug off later.)
By the way, Pierrot's now 5 months old! :D I just need to last two more months with him and I'll surpass Sonja's record! So far, I love the little dork. He makes me happy when I see him. :) It feels so good having a fursona that fits.
To address two other issues, I'm retiring Sorbet's old design and going to change a few things. I assume that's why no one liked her. XD
Sonja is not being retired. She's just no longer my fursona. She has a whole AU dedicated to her that I can't just erase now. Also, I don't HATE her, unlike another fursona of mine (*coughrigcough*), so if anything, I'm just going to use her in the series, but I'm not mad at her or anything!
I'm too sentimental over all of my characters to get rid of her completely.
My question to you guys, do you like where I'm going with my art lately? Or should I do an updated version of my old style? Like, I mix Don Bluth/Disney aspects into my character's heads/faces and body shapes and I'm trying to be more... "anatomically correct" lately and less cartoony. Is it a good change you guys like, or should I do the older stuff again? (I just really love the fact I can draw open mouths now, like nothing, like I've always wanted to do when I younger... Younger Me would be so proud of me right now... (And, disappointed I'm now such a shy, depressing, annoying idiot. No, wait, that was younger me. *rimshot*))
No pressure and I'm not going to snap at you all for answering. I just want to know your opinions. :)
