I went through an accident last week. Now sitting on a wheelchair. For the next... Forever...

~E

Awesome!, i got a 1000 views! Thanks ^_^ (and also a 1000 given comments :P)

To think of it.... What if i was bed ridden like him.... Unable to get up for 8 days... God that's hard.... Then after those 8 days you get out of the hospital on a wheel chair... Still amazing he played the piano after that.... Wow... Only for one request.... And it's on this profile.... Never knew the story behind it until now.... Well, i read it on his notes.... To think that he'll do all that for one drawing....

I mean, what is so special about it... No i'm not being mean to the artist or him.... It's just that..... I'm curious.... My other cousin hasn't told me anything about this....

Who knew that my boredom will take me here....

Anyway the past is past...

Benjamin is resting his bones, while my other cousin, hendrick is to wherever he is now...

(P.S: he has no Communication or whatsoever...)

~E (sometimes i ask myself.... Why do i need to put the first letter of my name?... When i'm the only one left?...)

After being outside for 10 hours...
I began to think....
That i need to go home... (my apartment).

Drink a latte...

Eat some cake....

Starbucks -_-'....

Take a shortcut in central park....

And time square...

Open the door....

Sit down....

Write....

Open the PC...

Share some photos (sometimes)...

Talk here in FA.net.....

So yeah....

Bye, and thanks for reading....

Maybe....

~E

Much work has been going on lately...
My apartment is a mess, my life is also a mess...
Huh.... Like someone "WOULD" care...
I'll be going to time square today....
Just... Gonna try to.... Rethink everything i have done...

It's hard to live... Especially being human....

What else is out there beyond those clouds...
Beyond our galaxy...
I should've been an astronaut...
Should've followed my younger dreams...

Anyway... I'm going to time square...
I need to see a crowd or somewhat...
A familiar face....
Though, that is impossible...
Especially with a person who has no such friends...

I mean, who would try?....

Huh........

Bye....

~E

Do you like Post-Rock?...
If you do comment below and
tell me your favorite post-rock
song. :)

~E

I don't usually search for deleted comments,

But when i do i go sherlock-like... -_-'

He's gone... i don't know where he'll go...

but i do know.... that he's gone...

god...

i acted like a fool at the airport today...

running and saying shit that i needed to talk to someone...

fuck...

FUCK!!!!!!!!!!!!!!....

~E

It all says on the page... what the hell are you doing enrick?!?!?!? you never told me you were fired!!...
where the fuck are you suppose to go now?... and your phone is down what the hell?...

My last and final journal on this website is this.
thank you all for watching me because of my pictures.

but don't unwatch me for this because i'm leaving..
i'll be selling all my stuff and other items and hopefully
use the money to survive...

my cousin, Edward H. will be the one to post
some pictures here and hopefully to keep this account alive...

you have been all good people to me...

and i won't forget that...

i may be a shadow here... a useless and an unwanted figment...

but underneath this black light... lies a heart of one soul...

trying to help anyone in need... through words and letters of empathy...

in this virtual world...

The person that will take this account may be different from me (though we are blood related)
but at least give him the chance to speak....

i guess that's about it...

goodbye...

you may not see me in person... but in my heart i consider you as a true friend...
there is no stranger for me, no enemies... just friends....

again....

goodbye....

~Hendrick R. ,09/05/2012, 6:05 (and counting new york time/ i'll be leaving at around 4:05 morning)

I bought a ticket back to the motherland...

I just don't know if they will approve it...

The money left in my pocket is about 400 dollars...

I sold my iphone 3gs and my suite for 300 dollars...

I guess there are no more photos...

And no more me...

When i go back to russia...

I'll sell my stuff and live on a farm...

But as for edward hamilton...

I think he'll be taking over this account forever...

This is my last journal...

Goodbye everyone...

You have been... Great people to me...

Especially you spotty_the_cheetah...

We may never see each other in the light...

But in my heart...

You're always a true friend...

And again... Goodbye...

~Hendrick R.
09/04/2012

I've been through a lot of things lately...
I just.... can't count them anymore...

I was fired today.... don't know why...
my friend at my old job betrayed me...
went to my office and took some of my belongings...

and now... i'm in an apartment somewhere here in New York...

all i have now is this suit and this old laptop of mine...

Plus a passport and some keys that i don't know what kind of
door it will open....

I feel a little homeless...

and the remaining money in my account today is only
1,524 dollars.... that's it...

damn it....

now i feel so lonely....

~Hendrick R.

I remembered the time where
We sat in our chairs and looked 
Outside the window.

I held my hand out in front of you
And then you held my hand without
Any hesitation.

We watched as the rain poured
Down at the edge of the window
Pane.

The white faint light bleeding through
The glass.

The rays sparkled at your eyes
As i glanced too look at you.

Then you began to tell me how
Much you loved me ever-since you saw
Me.

Then i told you a poem on how
We set sailed to the atlantic
And how we survived in a 
Paper boat without a bottom.

I resembled myself, in the end, as a 
Paper plane.

Creating white vapor lines
As i flied through the crease of time.

Then you faded away beside me
And i began to say...

Come back...

Come back!!!...

I woke up in cold sweat
And realized that it was all nothing,
But a dream...

But i sought to myself 
To never let it happen to us...

I hugged you tightly while you slept
Beside me in the old cabin..

Kissed your cheek, and wiped my
Tears

And i whispered to your ear..

"i will never let you go" 

Ok so Edward H. Did a great job for maintaining this
Account and i thank him for that.

As for me, i need to say sorry to someone...
Sad to say i can't see him in person because
I'm kinda shy about my identity but do trust
Me i'am never a betrayer a stalker or some dude with a mental problem or something.. I'm a real person..
With a heart, mind and soul..

And another thing..
For those going to the army,
Always ready your weapons
You may never know who might
Come.

But i hope all of you stay safe and please do enjoy your lives..
Don't be depressed by someone or yourself.

~Hendrick R.

As i said I'am not permanent here, and i mean me, Edward, am not permanent here..
I'm just keeping track for my cousin :)

and after one month you'll all get to speak to hendrick again ;)

It all says in the title
(and yes hendrick told me to do this.. Don't know why.. But i got to follow the man's rules :/ )

You could all find it in the profile info.
At the user page of this account

Please leave any comments here (if you want, it depends)

my cousin hendrick gave me this account.
so i guess i'm new to you guys

well i guess that is all.. hope i can speak to some of you someday

-Edward hamilton

Because of my busy schedule and new job I canno't keep up on this account

For all the watchers and especially good people which i have spoken too...
All i can do now is bid a farewell...
It's been nice talking to you all, you are all really good people...

but i have to pass on..
I don't always stay permanent in this account... so again...

goodbye...

I hope you like my cousin...
he is very good in English (hehe) unlike me...

so again.....

Goodbye.....

-Hendrick Regal


(PS: By the way, before i give this account, i have something to say about my cousin first..
he is good in english (obviously) and he is from NY, I visited him after my meeting with my father's bosses and he is also a photographer :) so i expect some of his photography will be good any way that is all. )

I don't know why but i'm tired to live anymore... first my lady... second my brother...
and now... my cousin in the past... Damn it!!!... why can't i be next?!?!?......














I'm just so Fucking tired of watching every single of my loved one's die.......
Even if i'm different to their DNA...
I still care for them........
Because they treated me the same way........

Well I'm going to the big apple hope i pass the meeting between my father's bosses wish me luck ;)

May the lord pave a path for your walk to heaven... if there is one...
and for the ones who are mourning to their passing..

Da budet putʹ k schastʹyu dlya vas ...

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=cD_FJ2ISyR0

http://www.furaffinity.net/view/7623483

Check it out if you may

Hopefully i can go by the title...

Anyway maybe this week i'll try to upload one of my digital paintings.
I'm going to upload only one.. And please.. Just for reason.
I dont know how to draw so, judge mildly..
Thanks..

Like autumn leaves
His sense fell from him
An empty glass of himself
Shattered somewhere within
His thoughts like a hundred moths
Trapped in a lampshade
Somewhere within
Their wings banging and burning
On through endless nights
Forever awake he lies shaking and starving
Praying for someone to turn of the light...