that sums it up sorry to anyone I've been having communication problems with

I'm not gonna sugarcoat things. Life is not easy. My mother is a near-psychopath driven insane by her sisters' neglectful bullshit like her sister marrying a god damned child predator who avoids the law. My parents have a failing marriage and allow drug addicts to use our home like a hotel & my meathead older brother is still a manchild and can barely handle raising his newborn and his relationship with the kid's abusive and manipulative mom who's an absolute slob and leaves our house like a dumpster, my brother's patience and my own is reaching it's limit if not already crossed after several of these things. One of said tweakers tried choking my younger brother out in his sleep and almost whipped my dad with a bike chain for me & my dad defending him. My grandmother just passed away from ALS. My dad IS getting help from a substance issue and my mom hopefully will get therapy sometime. But even with that, there's still so much other shit. I gave my girlfriend's sister COVID, and I know I did because I was there to help them get groceries. I've been plagued by thoughts of attempting at my life more and more after years. I witnessed two shootings in my neigborhood. My city almost fell into chaos from people freaking out over political bullshit.
As of this post, there's a few days until my grandmother's funeral. My father just needs time to finish his therapy and hopefully after this pandemic shit's over it will be easier to get him a social security card for a job that he can safely keep and make a decent earning off so we can get out this shithole. I don't want to demand pity but I just ask for understanding. If you have anything like this in your life, I just want to say your not alone. Your not abandoned. Your loved ones aren't lost or gone & they stilll have a chance. Family is something not determined by names or blood, but through trust, strength & love. I want to say that those who were there for me whether here, somewhere as menial as a Discord chat or who dared to help irl - Thank you. I don't have enough words for how much all of that meant. If I ever fall off the cliff that's the limit I've been near-pushed off, please forgive me.

Hey. I'm sorry for a lack of consistent uploading. Life at home isn't easy. I don't want to sugarcoat things so I'm just going to be straightforward: My parents have issues with substance use and mental health as well as my brothers and I - the oldest of the three of us also is having to deal with a kid coming in a few months and we don't know what to do about it since his abusive ex is claiming to take the custody when we know she just wants him for money/welfare,etc. and for the past few years we've dealt with moving house-to-house and going homeless for most of 2018-19 and most houses we've lived in have been in worse-off neighborhoods. The kind where people get shot or houses broken into. I just want to say thanks for the support that I have had and especially from several people I've had the luck to meet and enjoy time with on Discord. I'm sorry for everything. I don't know what else to say.

Sorry to be kinda dead and shit and have nothing existant besides the giant favorites list and dumb alt. I'm going to be working on posting things here, SFW or not. I've had a very difficult situation over the past few years regarding things like family drama and housing issues among most (not to sound venty, as much as a good coffee is), but I believe I can say that with this new decade comes a turning point in my life and that things are hopefully going to be a hell of a lot brighter for me, and that I can finally fucking start putting out content of some capacity like I planned to for a while but, welp, bullshit happened lel
I want to say that I hope everyone reading this has had a very happy holidays and a happy new year, and that I'm sorry for being so rude as to not saying the welcomes for all the absolutely amazing, outstanding friendly people & artists who have been so kind, generous, creative, and beautifully expressive to show their works to the world and for even being as nice for something as simple as a watch ;w;
Being who you are, and nobody else is the most beautiful you can be.