Good… time. How are you? Oh right, I can’t respond. Such is the way of the tree. In the meantime, let’s chat about why a giant broccoli is better than you.

*spacey music here*
Trees have been around longer than you. We are smarter, stronger, faster, tougher. Meanwhile if you get bonked too hard, you have a problem. If we trees get bonked, we play dead, until the person goes away, then we let karma and natural selection deal with them. Meanwhile you wander around and yell at them. If we trees have an issue, we have a staring contest.

So all think considered, you suck, we don’t, deal with it.



Oh yes, we are also polite and humble. You, lesser intelligent entity, you.