I've been running it through my head for a while now and I've made a decision.

I'm leaving the fandom. Permanently this time.

I'm just not really "into" it anymore. I know I've been doing art and stuff, and I've only really talked to one person about it, but yeah, it's
just too much to keep up with when your heart's not in it.

This isn't supposed to be a sad thing, and I don't want it to be. I love you guys to death, and I'm not going to stop being anyone's friend. The only thing that's changing is that I won't be a furry anymore. I'm still the same person, just a few inches taller and my name's Damon instead of Ton >u<

Like I said, I don't want this to be a sad thing. And please, PLEASE don't try and guilt me into staying. If you're my friends like I think you are, you'll be supportive of my decision and stick through it with me.

I love you guys, and you know where to find me.

 kinkynekokitty is an old friend of mine irl and her and her boyfriend are my new roommates(just btw)

GO WATCH HER AWESOME ART AND BE FRIENDLY TO HER WITH HUGS AND ALL THAT STUFF ^u^

So, lately a few things have happened:

1: I moved into a house with my friend and her boyfriend. They're both furs as well, so that's neat.

2: Decided to work on my weight a bit. I gained 25 pounds over the last few months because of all the stress I've had, and I'm determined to lose it

3: Still unsure about the dating situation. I thought I was ready to get back into it, but events lately have shown otherwise

4: I have a job driving a truck for a thrift store that's like Goodwill. It's a really cool job, we help people with developmental disabilities have jobs in the community as well as give them homes

Well, that's about it....just in case you wanted to know

Happy Paw Day >u<

And let the squishing commence

Fighting depression......I don't know what it is, if I'm just too much of a pushover or if I just judge myself too hard on things, but I've been kinda feeling like I get walked on a lot and taken for granted. Like people just expect me to be there and only call out when they need something. It isn't everyone, it might be nobody and I'm just overthinking it, but it's definitely something that's been kind of nagging me, and I've just kind of ignored it, but for some reason it's bothering me today......I'll probably delete this, because it's just kind of a vent and I don't want people to take it too personally.....It's just kinda depressing when you give and give and don't get much back. Which I guess I don't really expect much back, but it still kind of feels nice to know that it isn't just me who thinks about others, right? Agian, I don't want anyone to take it personally, I'm not trying to hurt anyone's feelings, I just needed to get these thoughts out and I'm not really sure who I can talk to about it, save a few people, but.....yeah

Note me those numbers, I got a new phone and I need my contacts back >u<

I love you guys

There's a huge ugly ad under the banner now!


I DUN LIEK IT!!! T~T

New questions list ^~^ and I was tagged

So... Comment and... You know

1. Tell you a drink you remind me off
2. Tell you a comment (This is better >u<)
3. Tell you a holiday you remind me off (they all won't be holidays)
4. Tell you what video game character you remind me of (get ready for some nerdage)
5. Tell you what story or movie character you remind me of (gonna be movies)
6. Give you a food item I think you'd like (because food)
7. Tell you a quick joke (they will not be funny, prepare to cringe)
8. Tell you which of my OCs you remind me of (......)
9. Tell you a YouTuber you remind me of (I only watch one, so....)
10. You know... repost as is, but change anything in ( ) to your desire. ^u^

Ever hear an album that brings tears to your eyes?

I just got one and it's so awesome TuT

Just thought you guys should know hehe

Going to the dentist today.....it's not as scary when you know your teeth are definitely going to be messed with, takes away the anxiety factor, but it still sucks, because they're gonna mess around with my teeth T~T

I'm pretty sure I have a cavity, my wisdom teeth are trying to grow in, and there's probably more.....guuuuh

I've been binge watching all of the classic Tom Baker episodes of Doctor Who on Netflix. I can see now why he's a lot of fan's favorite doctor, he's awesome. ^~^ I just wish netflix had more of his episodes, I don't think it even finishes the Key to Time story arc, which makes me sad...




Welp, I'm off to torrent 112 episodes of Doctor Who, be back in a bit.




Also, what are jelly babies? Huge jelly beans?

1. What animal/creature you remind me of.
2. Tell you what color I think fits you.
3. Tell you how I feel about you.
4. Insult you.
5. Tell you my favorite OC of yours.
6. Tell you what season you remind me of.
7. Tell you what food you smell like in my head.
8. Think of a random nickname for you.
9. Tell you what element you remind me of.
10. Ask you to put this in your journal without using the words 'tag' or 'dare'.

I hope it's going well for you guys ^~^

Mine's just ending hehe I went to church this morning, which was awesome, and I finally got up the nerve to ask someone one the prayer team to pray for me, and he did and he actually got a lot of words from God for me. I won't go into what they were, but they did make me cry out of happiness. If you know me well enough, you know that me crying is a big deal >u<

Then I went straight to my parents house and got to hang out with my family, which was surprisingly fun ^~^

Anyways, now I'm home in bed, probably going to play on my computer and chat with you guys, if you want to ^~^

I streamed all day >u< sooooo much art, and I got to hang out with my friends!

So much fun! Might do it tomorrow since more people are off work and school tomorrow hehe ^~^

Okay, so I set up a stream on Picarto.tv, because my friend  Kyle.Foxson uses it ^~^

So, go follow me on there, and I'll start doing streams so you can see me do art! >u<

https://www.picarto.tv/live/channel.....h=TonTehMouseh

Sorry for the super depressing art......I just needed to vent......I was working on it for a couple days when I got sad, and I decided to post it last night cuz I got depressed and finished it.....as weird as that sounds......I took it off of here though, I don't wanna look at it anymore......

And I don't want you guys to worry about me, I'll be okay........I'm just struggling lately with believing that people ACTUALLY care, and it's not anybodies fault but mine, I'm just getting too stressed out and it's making me too self conscious....I do love all of you guys and I'm not going anywhere, and I pray you guys don't go anywhere either.....It's just been a weird couple of weeks is all.....

So, on a lighter note, should I start doing streams? Do you think anyone would come to them?

Go ahead, I've got some free time! >u< Ask Ton some questions, and I'll draw the answers! Cuz a lot of people do that nowadays >u<

Kinda feeling like I've been.....annoying some people lately.....

I don't mean to.......I think I get really clingy sometimes with my friends, and that usually ends up pushing people away, I know, but..........I can't help it, I get lonely.....

I don't have a lot of friends irl that I can talk to very much, especially about certain things, and so I just end up bugging people on here and other places......plus I'm still kinda hurting from events lately, so I guess that's another reason I've been feeling clingy......

Idk, I don't wanna go on and on about this

I'm sorry if I've been a bother to anyone lately. Idk if I actually have, I just feel like I have, and I really don't want to. Don't even know if the people I've been talking to lately will even read this......ugh

http://www.furaffinity.net/journal/3929015/

My friend  lilwolf is doing commissions, and they're pretty cheap considering his art!

GO COMMISSION HIM NAO, HE DESERVES NICE THINGS!!!!!

1. What would you do if right now the love of your life walked in and asked you to marry him/her?
First I'd be weirded out, because I'm pretty sure I locked my front door......but I'd probably say yes >u<


2. Do you trust your friends?
Yeah........most of them


3. Would you move to another state or country to be with the one you love?
I'd probably do that just because honestly >u<


4. Do you believe that everything happens for a reason?
Of course


5. Name two things you would NOT tolerate in a relationship?
Lies, cheating, the main bad stuff.......


6. Which one of your friends do you think would make the best doctor?
None of you have permission to operate on me.....or anyone else >u<


7. Are you afraid of falling in love?
Not really, it happens really easy for me, I'm a lovey dovey person...........which isn't always good


8. Is there someone who pops into your mind at random times?
Not really, I randomly think about some of my friends though when I'm lonely


10. Would you stop talking to your friends because you hooked up with a new person?
No, that'd be terrible!


11. When was the last time you flew in a plane?
Never have T~T


12. What did the last text message you sent say?
Yeah, tomorrow hopefully


13. What features do you find most attractive in your preferred sex?
I like tall people >u< they make me feel safe.......


14. Fill in the blank. I like _______ .
Scrubs.....>u<


15. What is a goal you would like to accomplish in the near future?
Make an actually successful band >u<


16. If you were to wake up from being in a coma for an extensive time who would you call?
My mom


17. How many kids do you want to have?
3 is my limit >u<


18. Would you make a good parent?
I hope so, everyone tells me I'm very paternal


19. Where was/were your ID picture(s) taken?
The last actual picture I used was taken at a science museum in the art portion.......in a chair I wasn't meant to sit in >u<


20. What is your middle name?
Keith...........I don't like my middle name >u<


21. Honestly, what's on your mind right now?
.........I wrote something, but erased it......so that


23. Shoe size?
10


24. What are you wearing right now?
Gray skinny jeans and my red flannel


25. Righty or Lefty?
Righty


26. Can you make a dollar in change right now?
Yes, many dollars..........I should clean my dresser off >u<


26. Best place to eat?
Any chinese restaurant


27. Favorite pair of jeans you own?
My black skinny jeans


28. Favorite animal?
I've got a lot


29. Favorite juice?
I like apple juice


30. Have you had the chicken pox?
yeah


31. Have you had a sore throat?
Oh yes


33. Who knows you the best?
I'd say God


34. Do you get along with your family?
My mom's side, yes. My stepdad's side, mostly.


35. Do you wear contact lenses or glasses?
I wear glasses when I read and play on my laptop for long periods of time because my eyes get strained easily


36. Ever been in a fight with your pet?
Yeah, my dog likes to jump on me in the mornings when I let him sleep in my room >u<

37. Been to Mexico?
Nope


38. Did you buy something today?
Coffee and a small breakfast sandwich


39. Did you get sick today?
Nope


40. Did you miss someone today?
Kinda


41. Did you get in a fight with someone today?
It's pretty hard to get in an argument with me, I'm too passive and submissive >u< most of the time anyways, I do have buttons that people generally don't push.....


42. When is the last time you had a massage?
...........like a year ago?


43. Last person to lay in your bed?
Me


44. Last person to see you cry?
...........my ex


45. Who made you cry?
................my ex


46. What was the last TV show you watched?
............if you know me well enough, you can probably guess >u<


47. What are your plans for the weekend?
Work and sleep


48. Who do you think will repost this?
EVERYONE >u<


49. Name of the person you got this from.
 xverdewolfx

http://youtu.be/jQr5hW5GxMw


Yeah, this is pretty much how I feel about it


Plus: NIGHTWING IS BEST EVAR

I got a 5 foot long pillow last night




I'm going to cuddle this thing so hard




You don't even know, if I curl up it's bigger than me, and I love it

I hate causing people pain. I can't deal with it. I tried so hard throughout my relationship to keep both her and I from having to feel it, so much so that I made myself believe everything was fine when it wasn't. And I was so afraid of the pain that I couldn't stop it. I just kept hiding my feelings until I was forced to face them, and by then it just made the pain so much worse in the end. I sowed the breeze and reaped the whirlwind, I guess...the worst part is that she keeps blaming herself and heaping all of it on her, when it was my own insecurities and all around fear that brought it all down. I hate it. I hate the fact that I can't tell people how I feel, I hate that all of my emotions are just bottled up from years of abuse, and I don't know how to free them without them exploding. The only solace I can find in this storm are my friends and Jesus Christ. If there ever was any reason for me to be a Christian, it's because of times like this. I feel Him in every comforting word, and He's the only reason I'm able to cope. And thank you guys for helping me through this, I really love you all

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-e7XSG69_dc

You remember Steve from Blues Clues?! Yeah?!



THIS IS STEVE! AND STEVE IS AWESOME!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!NEW FAVORITE SONG!!!!!!!!!!!!