Trying to get into art
Posted 3 months agoYep, I decided to give drawing a try. Unfortunately, since I can't prove that my stuff isn't AI (I'm sure taking a picture of the whole damn notebook wouldn't convince the ever-ridiculous FA mods otherwise now), I won't be able to upload any of it here. That's also not to say anything of their policy of you (supposedly) have to credit the artist, so… I guess I'm stealing my art from myself? I don't know. Anyway, I'm thinking of making a telegram channel to post on, at least until SoFurry has moved over to their new servers. Let me know what you think, given that this journal isn't deleted by some power-hungry idiots.
More information here.
https://www.furaffinity.net/journal/11172924
More information here.
https://www.furaffinity.net/journal/11172924
Is my art mine or Fur Affinity's, as well as a grievance.
Posted 3 months agoHere's my ranting and grievance with FA's bullshit lately:
I've had, on two occasions now, art wrongly removed by the FA staff for reasons that don't go beyond their sorry-ass bullshit. I don't give them permission to use it or make ANY decisions based on what I do with what is rightfully mine. If anyone has any suggestions as to where I should take this to next, let me know. As for right now, I'm moving to Furry Network. My userpage is at the following link, so feel free to join that site and follow me there. I'll still stay on FA, but mostly as a watcher, as I want to be able to do what I want with what I have of my characters. If a YCH that I paid for with my own money isn't mine and a character that I created based on a 3D print I got on vacation ALSO isn't mine in Fur Affinity's eyes, then, the way I see it, Fur Affinity's staff is completely incompetent at what they do. Looking through their terms of services, when you put art on their [FA's] site, they're saying you're giving them the rights to do what the hell THEY want to do with it, assuming my understanding is correct. I just can't be a part of that clusterfuck anymore.
Furry Network: https://furrynetwork.com/b47_l1nk/
SoFurry: https://b47-l1nk.sofurry.com/
I've had, on two occasions now, art wrongly removed by the FA staff for reasons that don't go beyond their sorry-ass bullshit. I don't give them permission to use it or make ANY decisions based on what I do with what is rightfully mine. If anyone has any suggestions as to where I should take this to next, let me know. As for right now, I'm moving to Furry Network. My userpage is at the following link, so feel free to join that site and follow me there. I'll still stay on FA, but mostly as a watcher, as I want to be able to do what I want with what I have of my characters. If a YCH that I paid for with my own money isn't mine and a character that I created based on a 3D print I got on vacation ALSO isn't mine in Fur Affinity's eyes, then, the way I see it, Fur Affinity's staff is completely incompetent at what they do. Looking through their terms of services, when you put art on their [FA's] site, they're saying you're giving them the rights to do what the hell THEY want to do with it, assuming my understanding is correct. I just can't be a part of that clusterfuck anymore.
Furry Network: https://furrynetwork.com/b47_l1nk/
SoFurry: https://b47-l1nk.sofurry.com/
Not sure what to do
Posted 4 months agoOkay, so this is going to be a bit scatterbrained (as if most of what I do isn't), but here it is: I'm not sure how to get my writing out there.
Let me start by giving some rundown of how I came to feel comfortable calling myself a writer.
Back in eighth grade, we had to do a creative writing project in English class. Naturally, I wasn't interested, as the school I went to was SERIOUSLY holding me back, coupled with the fact that, where I am… intellectually stimulating isn't what might come to one's mind. That's rural Alabama for ya, I guess. Anyway, so we had to do a creative writing project, and at the time, my mind was solely on computers and technology, mostly the older and weirder stuff that I could get my hands on, mostly thanks to my uncle, who was living in New York State at the time, so I decided to grin and bear it. While the project was a multi-day affair, class-wise, it gave me the chance to play around with some new office suites for Windows (I hadn't really delved into the Wonderful World of Linux just yet, so Free and Open Source was still just Crappy Knockoff to me… damn, have I learned!). Not being able to use Google Docs on my computer (at the time, I swapped between a Gateway Solo 3450 and iBook G4 Laptop, this was 2013), I screwed around with a version of OpenOffice.org and Microsoft Office 2000 (both on Windows 98 SE) and played around with AppleWorks, an old version of iWork (which I quickly stopped using), and Microsoft Office X for Mac. I know none of those are FOSS, but I was still learning and looking around. Anyway, I used the different suites to come up with a short draft, mostly to play around with them, before settling on Microsoft Office on the iBook, mostly because the iBook was the only thing I had with a battery that WORKED and Office X for Mac was both familiar enough that I was able to navigate through it, but also new enough to me that I could keep exploring. What I ended up doing was, in usual me fashion, going overboard. Needless to say, I had pictures to go along with it as I read to the class (and to some observers from the Board of Education… they're probably still wondering about me, but I digress) and felt completely IN my element.
That was when the spark was ignited.
Over the next few years, I kept writing, mostly keeping myself focused in a fictional world that was… twentyish… years behind what reality was (it was 2013, my headspace was when Windows 95 came out and the DOS prompt was still a familiar sight). I went in and out of a few fandoms, writing my own fanfics, even tried to be a part of the brony fandom after a friend managed to get me to watch a few episodes of My Little Pony, as well as started on a script for a Steven Universe episode that I wanted to send to Rebecca Sugar, but that never panned out. To me, writing quickly became everything. I couldn't move from my parents' house (and still can't), so writing and Minecraft was how I kept myself from going crazy. The internet was my home, fiction was how I made it what I wanted. Vampires, beastmen/furries, anime, the list goes on. I was your standard shut-in nerd, plus a few extra languages in the back, for years, slowly getting blocked by more and more mental fog.
Eventually going through two jobs (first was a two-month stint at a piece of shit's graphics shop, where everyone made me realize just how worthless I am because I'm autistic and a genius, yet expected me to do better than everyone there, second was McDonald's, where the experience was a few notches up, but the raise to minimum wage wasn't enough to justify the headache) and landing on my third job, thanks to a family friend (a couple, actually), my now-current manager saw me as a person who'd been through hell. First, I was in the back doing assembly for a few weeks, then just a regular stock person on the floor. One day, she tells me that she wants me to be the main sales person on the floor. I didn't know it at the time, but she wanted to help me gain some confidence. She knew I was amazing with technology, but could stand to grow in my interpersonal skills. Her plan was to give me the mobile POS and have me be the sales leader on the floor. I was, naturally, skeptical, but after a few times of checking people out and explaining to them the options that we had on the shelf, it became clear to me: I was just telling people facts and, occasionally, having a quick chat about life or solutions to problems. Early on in this position, my father came to get something from our store, and my manager explained what my position was to him. He said that I couldn't do that kind of thing, to which she printed out a comments page where, evidently, several people had listed me by name with nothing but positive things to say, both proving him wrong and reaffirming her hypothesis about my lack of confidence. I never disappoint, or so I'm told (lately I'm becoming less skeptical about that), in that position.
How does that relate to my writing? I came out to my manager when I was going to publish my first ebook, and again for my second, which she saw as real accomplishments.
I've been working on my writing, my characters, my sonas, but nothing seems to be going right anymore. After losing my third (and last) grandfather to a years-long battle with ALS on the day after Thanksgiving 2024, everything just stopped. I couldn't write, I couldn't focus, I couldn't sit down to my piano and play music, hell, I couldn't even do anything on a computer.
His death really shook me off-balance.
My boyfriend, after talking about Grandeddy to him a few times, wanted to come down for the memorial next week, so I bought the train tickets to and from me, giving a week due to my wanting to spend some time with him and also not being good at planning trips (to be completely honest). He fits into this story by being the first person I came out to, non-anonymously, about being interested in gaining and fats, as well as showed him some of my self-indulgent fatfur and WG stories (mostly just me imagining stuff and typing it onto an external SSD). He also liked my writing (both regular and kinky, bedroom-only shit) and suggested I do commissions on the side. This was well-before Grandeddy passed. I wasn't sure about it because, by this point, my mind was just fuzzy, leaving me to simply go through the motions every day.
Anyway, to finish it all off, here I am. I don't know what to do, because the only stories I've been able to clearly think of were my two Gwenn stories, but she's just my fat unicorn. I don't know if I should try to go back to what I had proofed before Grandeddy passed, or if I should just drop that completely, start over from scratch, and do my best to write things that people would be proud to keep in the bottom of their sock drawers. Right now, it's just a feeling of emptiness and nothingness, writing is. I'm not sure if I'm looking for recognition or if I'm dealing with something more substantial. The fog had set in long before I even started thinking about Grandeddy's mortality, so I don't think that's related, but I could be wrong.
Put simply, I just don't know what to do right now.
Let me start by giving some rundown of how I came to feel comfortable calling myself a writer.
Back in eighth grade, we had to do a creative writing project in English class. Naturally, I wasn't interested, as the school I went to was SERIOUSLY holding me back, coupled with the fact that, where I am… intellectually stimulating isn't what might come to one's mind. That's rural Alabama for ya, I guess. Anyway, so we had to do a creative writing project, and at the time, my mind was solely on computers and technology, mostly the older and weirder stuff that I could get my hands on, mostly thanks to my uncle, who was living in New York State at the time, so I decided to grin and bear it. While the project was a multi-day affair, class-wise, it gave me the chance to play around with some new office suites for Windows (I hadn't really delved into the Wonderful World of Linux just yet, so Free and Open Source was still just Crappy Knockoff to me… damn, have I learned!). Not being able to use Google Docs on my computer (at the time, I swapped between a Gateway Solo 3450 and iBook G4 Laptop, this was 2013), I screwed around with a version of OpenOffice.org and Microsoft Office 2000 (both on Windows 98 SE) and played around with AppleWorks, an old version of iWork (which I quickly stopped using), and Microsoft Office X for Mac. I know none of those are FOSS, but I was still learning and looking around. Anyway, I used the different suites to come up with a short draft, mostly to play around with them, before settling on Microsoft Office on the iBook, mostly because the iBook was the only thing I had with a battery that WORKED and Office X for Mac was both familiar enough that I was able to navigate through it, but also new enough to me that I could keep exploring. What I ended up doing was, in usual me fashion, going overboard. Needless to say, I had pictures to go along with it as I read to the class (and to some observers from the Board of Education… they're probably still wondering about me, but I digress) and felt completely IN my element.
That was when the spark was ignited.
Over the next few years, I kept writing, mostly keeping myself focused in a fictional world that was… twentyish… years behind what reality was (it was 2013, my headspace was when Windows 95 came out and the DOS prompt was still a familiar sight). I went in and out of a few fandoms, writing my own fanfics, even tried to be a part of the brony fandom after a friend managed to get me to watch a few episodes of My Little Pony, as well as started on a script for a Steven Universe episode that I wanted to send to Rebecca Sugar, but that never panned out. To me, writing quickly became everything. I couldn't move from my parents' house (and still can't), so writing and Minecraft was how I kept myself from going crazy. The internet was my home, fiction was how I made it what I wanted. Vampires, beastmen/furries, anime, the list goes on. I was your standard shut-in nerd, plus a few extra languages in the back, for years, slowly getting blocked by more and more mental fog.
Eventually going through two jobs (first was a two-month stint at a piece of shit's graphics shop, where everyone made me realize just how worthless I am because I'm autistic and a genius, yet expected me to do better than everyone there, second was McDonald's, where the experience was a few notches up, but the raise to minimum wage wasn't enough to justify the headache) and landing on my third job, thanks to a family friend (a couple, actually), my now-current manager saw me as a person who'd been through hell. First, I was in the back doing assembly for a few weeks, then just a regular stock person on the floor. One day, she tells me that she wants me to be the main sales person on the floor. I didn't know it at the time, but she wanted to help me gain some confidence. She knew I was amazing with technology, but could stand to grow in my interpersonal skills. Her plan was to give me the mobile POS and have me be the sales leader on the floor. I was, naturally, skeptical, but after a few times of checking people out and explaining to them the options that we had on the shelf, it became clear to me: I was just telling people facts and, occasionally, having a quick chat about life or solutions to problems. Early on in this position, my father came to get something from our store, and my manager explained what my position was to him. He said that I couldn't do that kind of thing, to which she printed out a comments page where, evidently, several people had listed me by name with nothing but positive things to say, both proving him wrong and reaffirming her hypothesis about my lack of confidence. I never disappoint, or so I'm told (lately I'm becoming less skeptical about that), in that position.
How does that relate to my writing? I came out to my manager when I was going to publish my first ebook, and again for my second, which she saw as real accomplishments.
I've been working on my writing, my characters, my sonas, but nothing seems to be going right anymore. After losing my third (and last) grandfather to a years-long battle with ALS on the day after Thanksgiving 2024, everything just stopped. I couldn't write, I couldn't focus, I couldn't sit down to my piano and play music, hell, I couldn't even do anything on a computer.
His death really shook me off-balance.
My boyfriend, after talking about Grandeddy to him a few times, wanted to come down for the memorial next week, so I bought the train tickets to and from me, giving a week due to my wanting to spend some time with him and also not being good at planning trips (to be completely honest). He fits into this story by being the first person I came out to, non-anonymously, about being interested in gaining and fats, as well as showed him some of my self-indulgent fatfur and WG stories (mostly just me imagining stuff and typing it onto an external SSD). He also liked my writing (both regular and kinky, bedroom-only shit) and suggested I do commissions on the side. This was well-before Grandeddy passed. I wasn't sure about it because, by this point, my mind was just fuzzy, leaving me to simply go through the motions every day.
Anyway, to finish it all off, here I am. I don't know what to do, because the only stories I've been able to clearly think of were my two Gwenn stories, but she's just my fat unicorn. I don't know if I should try to go back to what I had proofed before Grandeddy passed, or if I should just drop that completely, start over from scratch, and do my best to write things that people would be proud to keep in the bottom of their sock drawers. Right now, it's just a feeling of emptiness and nothingness, writing is. I'm not sure if I'm looking for recognition or if I'm dealing with something more substantial. The fog had set in long before I even started thinking about Grandeddy's mortality, so I don't think that's related, but I could be wrong.
Put simply, I just don't know what to do right now.
New Story
Posted 4 months agoIn the next few days, I'm going to be working on uploading another story, though the quality might be a bit lacking. Granted, half of the reason for it was that I simply wanted a reason to play around with Windows 95 and Microsoft Works 4. It's going to be a fat/WG themed work featuring my other adopt, Gwenn, which I hope to have some art (other than just the picture from the adopt) to upload of her soon. Fingers crossed that everything goes well!
To the Retro Tech Enthusiasts Out There
Posted 11 months agoI just wanted to post this to all of the retro tech enthusiasts out there (myself being one of them) and let you guys know of some of the projects that are going on. First is PCem and 86Box. Originally, I preferred PCem, but quickly fell in love with 86Box while I was using a laptop with linux as my main PC. Long story short, I originally swapped over because PCem wasn't working correctly for some reason, but 86Box became my favorite of the two when I played around in the UI and saw that it was more configurable (even emulating a dial up modem, now, so BIG PLUS!!). The only downside to that is that neither project (that I'm aware of) emulates anything newer than a Pentium II (or equivalent) processor, though I'm led to understand that's simply because of the amount of power it would take to get acceptable emulation performance. Still, I take what I can get. Anyway, WinWorldPC, The Internet Archive (obviously), and 7-Zip (if you're running Windows) are going to be your best friends for getting software. If you're on Linux, I know there are a number of different configurations for archiver utilities, so you would probably just be fine to use the one that came with your preferred distro. Now, as for storage, we all know the price of SSDs has come down MASSIVELY in recent years, and I've been playing around with Walmart-grade crap (that's not why I turned on tipping, that's for a completely different reason). Now, since my main computer is a laptop (connected to a docking station if I'm at my desk), I'm essentially forced to use USB-compatible storage. The onn SSD things from Walmart (while only about 500 GB each) are very good from my usage, and they are USB-C native, so they're lightening fast. The only thing I reccomend is picking up a separate cable, because the ones with the drives can be kind of hit or miss. Any cable that has a Type C connector on one end should work, just make sure it's a reliable one so no data gets lost or corrupted. Below, I'll have a list of the websites and sources that I find helpful, as well as links to the projects. As for storage, though, I would reccomend getting two SSDs, rather than just a single, larger one. The reasoning behind this is you can have Retro Software completely independent from your Retro Drives. As with anything like this, I would also say to make a spreadsheet with all of the values of your configuration, if you think you'll be changing, deleting, and just experimenting with them.
PCem
https://pcem-emulator.co.uk/
86Box
https://86box.net/
WinWorld
https://winworldpc.com/home
7-Zip
https://www.7-zip.org/
The Retro Web
https://theretroweb.com/
The Internet Archive
https://archive.org/
Walmart 500GB SSD (not an affiliate link)
https://www.walmart.com/ip/onn-500G.....ive/1267632139
PCem
https://pcem-emulator.co.uk/
86Box
https://86box.net/
WinWorld
https://winworldpc.com/home
7-Zip
https://www.7-zip.org/
The Retro Web
https://theretroweb.com/
The Internet Archive
https://archive.org/
Walmart 500GB SSD (not an affiliate link)
https://www.walmart.com/ip/onn-500G.....ive/1267632139
Wolfiewiccan's blacklist
Posted 12 months agoAs asinine as this is, I honestly can't believe that I'm having to do this, so I'll only say it once. Wolfiewiccan's blacklist is inaccurate. I originally wanted to get a couple of his YCH offerings before realizing he is a scammer and a liar. I have the screenshots proving this. He said he had a medical issue (a trait I have seen scammers use before) and when I confronted him about it, he immediately decided to demonize me. Now, quite frankly, my usual artists and friends know that I'm only skeptical, not… whatever dick he thinks I am to be, but, as far as I'm concerned, that's his problem. If anyone wants screenshots, I will be more than happy to provide, as I have nothing to hide. I'm trying to make it as an author, much like he says he's making it as an artist. Understandably, I don't know him outside of the computer, nor do I have anyone that I trust enough to vouch for his claims. With that being said, I rest my case.
Third book getting finished
Posted 2 years agoOkay, so I've finished with the rough draft of my third book, so the next stage is to proof it… with my track record, I don't fully trust myself here, but it is ready for that stage. I'm making extra-sure that it's done right this time, so I'll let a few of my family and friends look at it and, after a week or so, I'll open the text again and make any edits I can find that need to be made as well. I skipped over that one with «Hidden in Plain Sight», and it shows. Live and learn, I guess, but I do have some ideas for what I want to do with the next book, and something that I only did with this one. On the plus side, I got me a PowerBook 5300c (that I messed the lid up on), so (and I'll probably only do this for shits and giggles) I can write some of my works that take place in the 90s on period-correct hardware!
Really, though, there's just a few old computers I'd keep in my collection now, as compared to the expansive array I wanted (and couldn't feasibly get) when I was younger… one of which, for instance, was a Macintosh II (or something from the series), which (as most of the desktops were) would serve the purpose of me having a computer I could keep at my grandparents' house when I was still in school, so I'd only have to worry about carrying a cell phone over there and hooking it into that funky setup to get online with.
Times have changed, but it's still fun to think of how crazy I was for thinking it would be realistically practical- stay true to your roots, I can't stress that enough.
Anyway, I've got one project that's coming to Fur Affinity, I'll probably proof it so I don't come off as as much of a hack, and it's about a goat that's loosely based off of me and, hopefully, will help with some of the outsiders, weirdos, and rebels… those of us that march to the beat of our own drummer, that there's a good journey and satisfying ending out there for you too.
You just have to search for it and embrace it tightly.
Really, though, there's just a few old computers I'd keep in my collection now, as compared to the expansive array I wanted (and couldn't feasibly get) when I was younger… one of which, for instance, was a Macintosh II (or something from the series), which (as most of the desktops were) would serve the purpose of me having a computer I could keep at my grandparents' house when I was still in school, so I'd only have to worry about carrying a cell phone over there and hooking it into that funky setup to get online with.
Times have changed, but it's still fun to think of how crazy I was for thinking it would be realistically practical- stay true to your roots, I can't stress that enough.
Anyway, I've got one project that's coming to Fur Affinity, I'll probably proof it so I don't come off as as much of a hack, and it's about a goat that's loosely based off of me and, hopefully, will help with some of the outsiders, weirdos, and rebels… those of us that march to the beat of our own drummer, that there's a good journey and satisfying ending out there for you too.
You just have to search for it and embrace it tightly.
Book Sale
Posted 2 years agoFrom September 1 to September 9, I'm going to be running an event on both of my books (An Exercise in Frustration! and Hidden in Plain Sight) where they will be free. On September 10, they'll go back to their respective prices of $4.99 US and $5.99 US. Unfortunately, as I'm still trying to become established as an author, I don't know any "good" avenues to do this yet, but I'm hoping that, not only will this help me get an audience, but also help some people as they go into the 2023-24 school year know that they don't have to be ashamed of feeling crazy.
To those people, know that I've got some pretty crazy stuff that I was ashamed of writing when I was younger. I may release some of it over here in time. Word to the wise, I'm more about quality and effort rather than what someone or something is connected to, but they'll be there.
Anyway, that being said, enjoy the day and try to moldy mushroom log if you live somewhere humid that's experiencing a heatwave like we are right now!
An Exercise in Frustration!
https://www.kobo.com/us/en/ebook/an.....in-frustration
Hidden in Plain Sight
https://www.kobo.com/us/en/ebook/hi.....plain-sight-62
To those people, know that I've got some pretty crazy stuff that I was ashamed of writing when I was younger. I may release some of it over here in time. Word to the wise, I'm more about quality and effort rather than what someone or something is connected to, but they'll be there.
Anyway, that being said, enjoy the day and try to moldy mushroom log if you live somewhere humid that's experiencing a heatwave like we are right now!
An Exercise in Frustration!
https://www.kobo.com/us/en/ebook/an.....in-frustration
Hidden in Plain Sight
https://www.kobo.com/us/en/ebook/hi.....plain-sight-62
New Author
Posted 2 years agoI'm a new author with two books out, and I'm trying to be a little more active with people. I don't have a specific genre I write, other than stuff to make you think. Whether or not I do good at that, I'm not sure. The website listed on my profile page is my personal website (or blog, if you wanna be technical about it). I try to keep that updated with stuff as I come up with it, but sometimes, life has a tendency to get in the way, so I don't keep it as updated as I'd like to. Really, that's for everything, from the link to what I publish on Kobo to the stories I'll end up posting here, though the stories posted here on Fur Affinity, I'm not considering it canon to the books I have for sale, so think of the stuff here as a kind of "What If x?" or maybe development for other characters, storyverses, anything of that nature; the characters, they're canon. Personally, I'd like to not be stuck with ideas that don't seem to be going anywhere, but I guess that's just part of the creative process: come up with something bad that goes nowhere and has no inherent purpose, you get fifty things coming from it. Rinse and repeat until you have something you can go with.
Anyway, I don't know how many people will end up coming to this page, but I'm hoping this journal helps get the word out. At the moment, I'm on medical leave, so my only source of income right now is my books, which don't seem to be attracting any attention at all.
Website
https://booksbyadamhanby.blogspot.com/
Books for sale
https://www.kobo.com/us/en/search?q.....r=adam%20hanby
Anyway, I don't know how many people will end up coming to this page, but I'm hoping this journal helps get the word out. At the moment, I'm on medical leave, so my only source of income right now is my books, which don't seem to be attracting any attention at all.
Website
https://booksbyadamhanby.blogspot.com/
Books for sale
https://www.kobo.com/us/en/search?q.....r=adam%20hanby
Story and (possibly) Art Commissions
Posted 3 years agoMy friend, Williamflowerew https://www.furaffinity.net/user/williamflowerew/, needs a little extra income. He writes stories (fats, I believe), and I'm making this in hopes of getting him a little bit of help. He charges 12€ or $12 for 2,000 words (his words, not mine), and he could really use the help. I've read his work, and it's definitely good quality, he does both SFW and NSFW. I'm not 100% sure what all he does, but you could ask, I'm sure. I also believe he does art as well, so you might even consider asking him about that, too!
FA+
