Lately I've been catching a lot of crap regarding religion and spiritual practices. This is not something I'd usually make a journal about, but considering how much I have been accused of lately by people interested in forcing their own beliefs down my throat, to the point of giving me OCD ticks I have to get rid of now.. I've got to clear the air.

No, I do not believe what you believe. No, I am not evil, nor am I doing anything evil or disgusting. Seriously, what the actual fuck.

No, I am not interested in what you personally think is 'right'. You've absolutely no right to push your rules on me as if they apply universally. They do not.

I don't care what 'authority' you cite as the basis for your improper behavior with respect to the first two bullet points. People have always thought it was such a great idea to tell other people what to think, as long as it serves their own interests, and frankly I want no part of that. It doesn't belong in any discussion with me. It does not stand up as a valid logical argument.

No more BS. That is all.

tl;dr - AnimeCat and her husband want to adopt a baby, and need a little help funding the process.

Go here for details: http://www.furaffinity.net/view/19719700/

I've noticed several artists on my watchlist becoming a bit overly snippy or being outright nasty towards their fans. This is not okay; in fact, for some of you this means that I'm going to be re-evaluating whether I want to continue to support you through commissions.

To those people on the 'net who think they have even the most minute of authority to proclaim what is or is not possible for another person: how utterly arrogant and pretentious of you. I strongly suggest that you turn off your computer now, walk upstairs, and go outside.

https://31.media.tumblr.com/tumblr_.....WMt1r21o7g.gif

Lately I've noticed a bunch of crap stirring about in the parts of the internet I frequent, and I'm not sure what to make of a lot of it. So I'm going to post my thoughts here as questions.

1) What exactly does one do with an adoptable? I bought exactly one of these, and the picture that was sent to me in return was rather low resolution and on a solid background, as if it had simply been cut out of the group of four that had been up for auction. I also didn't get the IC delivery I had hoped for. This confuses me. What exactly did I pay for?

2) Why are so many artists and watchers making a big deal out of Patreon? Personally, using it to crowd-source some type of ongoing project like a web-comic seems like a pretty great idea. However, I've also seen artists who are using it to try and get paid for things that they are doing solely for themselves, or as a way to 'double-charge' the community for their work. As an individual who writes code on commission, the latter seems rather appalling, and reminds me of certain artists who attempt to resell prints of other people's characters, which they were paid to draw already. But rather than rail at them about it, my suggestion for watchers is to simply refuse to fund them until they're willing to work on something of value for the community. They'll get the picture pretty quick.

3) What the fuck is GamerGate? Seriously, what is it? Because when I look at it, all I see is a gigantic ball of dung. There is no real discussion going on about -anything-, despite numerous claims I have seen to the contrary, and the whole 'controversy' feels sort of fabricated.. as if some people had nothing better to do with their time. I have a suggestion: Make and play whatever games you want, with whatever theme or formula you prefer. That is what I've always done and will continue to do. You may not like the same games as me. I don't care. Which leads me to...

4) The internets has apparently exploded with talk about fairness and 'equality' and race, sex, gender identity, and whatever else people with small minds like to use to judge total strangers. People keep insisting this talk is 'healthy', and ridicule anyone who doesn't agree with everything they say on the subject. Well, it isn't healthy. It's not even sane. People who have met me know that I am for the most part blind about what demographics they might fit into. Heck, I don't even remember a person's name until I've met them three or four times. So when an angry, self-proclaimed feminist comes up to me and declares that the male gender causes all the problems and shouldn't exist, and refuses to even acknowledge me as a human being, how is this NOT discrimination? Further, should I be denied job opportunities because my appearance is that of the stereotypical white male computer geek? Because apparently, some people out there think that this sort of behavior, and dare I say it, discrimination, is somehow acceptable if the people who stand to gain are 'minorities'. And those people are rather quick to label those who disagree with this rather warped view of equality as 'sexist', or 'racist', or whatever-the-fuck-else-ist. Is this really an argument about fairness and equality? Or is it merely a bunch of special interest groups chasing after special treatment? What happened to the idea of seeing WHO a person is rather than WHAT a person is?

5) Is it just me, or have people steadily gotten more callous and often downright cruel towards each other in general? It's like all anyone really cares about is how much money they can get and how much stuff they can buy. . to the point where I have actually witnessed a person simply not bother to brake to avoid a car accident, and judging by the fact they immediately started taking pictures, they did so because they were gunning for an insurance payout. And this example is by far not the only instance I could list, though it is one of the most obvious..

6) Meow? :P

I'm looking for a concept artist who has reasonable rates and is good at drawing clothing designs.

The purpose for this is I am working on building one of my characters in Second Life, and my contact who does rigged mesh clothing needs references of the design before we can go any further towards getting it created.

If anyone knows a good artist, please let me know in comments.

Thanks,
--Tzolkat

So apparently if your window size is not the same as your monitor size (in my case 1920x1080), you'll get fewer images in the recent favorites list (8 in my case). But if you click-hold, as if selecting text, and drag over and down the bottom row of the favorites widget, you can make the larger preview at the top display images which don't display in the list. X3

So the page is loading them, but the div is not expanding vertically to allow them to be visible on the page.

... I HATE FAT BUNNEHS ZOMG!!!!1

There. I've participated. :P

... Weird. How long's that SFW link been up there? Anyway....

VMware Workstation 7.. which at least for my hardware is now VMware Doesn't-Workstation... The Student license of that thing when I got it was around $100. I don't remember exactly how much, just that it was pricey. That included no upgrades. In fact, they released a new version months after my purchase, but didn't include me in the group of people who could upgrade to at least get their money's worth, so my copy was almost immediately rendered obsolete and required manually hacking VMs made in Workstation 8 to get them to work, even though the only thing keeping them from working was the version number.

Now, after upgrading my hardware, Workstation doesn't work at all. It'll run on my computer, but as far as running a guest operating system, which is its primary function, it is completely useless. I get this weird error when the VM boots, right after getting the menu in Linux asking if I want to run/install/etc.. "The CPU has been disabled by the Guest operating system ..." Looking into this error, it usually occurs when someone is trying to hack Mac OS to run in VMware, or if Speedstep is enabled on the guest. I went as far as to even disable Speedstep in the BIOS of my machine. None of this helped. It appears to get this same error no matter what Guest OS I'm trying to run! Even Ubuntu, which is specifically mentioned in the list of supported operating systems.

Where it gets really and truly infuriating is that the error hasn't been widely documented for anything BUT Mac OSX hacks. And those forums and a somewhat limited knowledge base are all the support that is offered... wait for it... without paying $49.99 PER INCIDENT. That's right, they want half the software's value just for one session with tech support, either via email or phone, something they should probably be supplying free of charge for the obscene amount of money they charge for this thing..

Needless to say, after all the times I've gotten burned by VMware on just this one program alone, I'm through with them. I nuked Workstation from my computer and went through with a fine toothed comb just to make sure it was completely gone. May this journal stand as a warning to anyone thinking of purchasing a VMware product. . you most likely WON'T get your money's worth.

**Edit**: As if I needed any more reasons not to deal with VMware anymore, I installed VirtualBox and it is working perfectly. I find it a bit disturbing though that software which is free (GPLv2) works fine while proprietary licensed software consistently fails..

That's right fuzzies, yet another part of your childhood, ruined. :P

http://www.cracked.com/quick-fixes/.....ildrens-movie/

That is all.

I've never been good at this wordy thing.. writing stories yes.. getting people to see my point, apparently not.

It is not, nor has it ever been, about a forking game. Getting into a game has a lot more to do with protecting myself against a particular type of social atmosphere. Half the time I don't even really want to play. Want to know why I'm forking grumpy in game over just about anything? I probably didn't want to play, or thought I was in the mood but wasn't. Maybe I don't feel like my play style fits, and would really rather bail out, but stick it out anyway for whatever reason. Maybe I just wanted to hear a friendly voice, and a game is the only way I could get that...

And so the real problem here is that I've come to a point where I feel I must protect myself from people I once called friends, and feel obligated to game with them just to fit in. Or just flat out to hear a group of familiar voices... and then I feel I have to watch my back constantly else I be talked about behind it, due to aforementioned social atmosphere...

Have I indulged in said social atmosphere? Yes.. but that doesn't make it any less wrong.

Hah! ... I see none. I see people pointing their fingers and screaming drama because they don't feel like answering the hard questions, actually communicating with the people they call friends. Or maybe people don't remember what life was like before the attitude was adopted that 'this is the internet, we can treat people however we want with no consequences'.

Do you honestly think I'm going to trust a word any of my so-called friends say after I catch them in a blatant lie, and then refuse to talk to me logically when I call them out on it? Forgive me, but I'm not -that- stupid.

Now, back to drama... drama would be causing a huge interpersonal nightmare which affects people outside of a group. Confronting your friends for lying and sneaking around behind your back is not drama, no matter how annoying certain individuals might find it.

Believe me, if I wanted to cause drama, I could do -way- better than telling people who are supposed to be friends how I feel I have been treated, consistently, over a long period of time. Respectable people would have realized this was something to be concerned about and took the matter into account, seriously and logically, rather than just attacking and making idle accusations, or ignoring altogether.

So basically, this is me, telling you to stop with this counterproductive behavior and face the situation that you had a hand in building.

Got this one from ZenFetcher...

---

ALL | ABOUT | ME
____________________________________________________________________________

- Name: Alex
- Single or taken: Single, Not Looking.
- Sex: Male (sort of)
- Birthday: N/A
- Hair color: Varies.
- Eye color: Blue.
- Height: About 5ft 4in
- Are you straight/bisexual/gay?: Bi, I suppose.
____________________________________________________________________________

S P E C I F I C S
____________________________________________________________________________

- What kind of shampoo do you use?: Some kinda fancy Tea Tree stuff I get at a salon.
- What are you listening to right now?: Computer fans.
- Who is the last person that called you?: My friends Aleyn, Zen, Mandy, and Chaos.
- How many buddies are online right now?: About 20? I lost count.
____________________________________________________________________________

F A V O R I T E S
____________________________________________________________________________

- Animal: Clouded Leopard.
- Color: Blue, Silver, Black.
- Drink: IBC Root Beer, or SoBe Power.
- Element: Storm, or Darkness
- Food: My tastes vary from day to day.
- Game: Portal 1 and 2.
- Movie: How to Train Your Dragon.
- Song: Varies from day to day.
- Subjects in school: Physics.
- T.V.: Warehouse 13.
____________________________________________________________________________

H A V E | Y O U | E V E R
____________________________________________________________________________

- Given anyone a bath?: A dog.
- Smoked?: Once.
- Bungee jumped?: No.
- Made yourself throw up?: No.
- Skinny dipped?: No.
- Ever been in love?: It's possible.
- Made yourself cry to get out of trouble?: No.
- Pictured your crush naked?: Not completely, 'cause that would be tasteless. :P
- Actually seen your crush naked?: Does topless count? :P
- Cried when someone died?: Yes.
- Lied: A few times.
- Fallen for your best friend?: It could happen.
- Used someone?: No.
____________________________________________________________________________

C U R R E N T
____________________________________________________________________________

- Clothes: T-shirt and Shorts.
- Desktop picture: Minimal, looks like leather.
- CD in player: Not listening to any music.
- DVD in player: Not watching any movies.

____________________________________________________________________________

L A S T | P E R S O N
____________________________________________________________________________

- You touched: A cat.
- Hugged: A cat.
- You kissed: A cat.
- You IMed: Chaos.
- Talk to online: Chaos, Aleyn, Cadmus, and Zen.
- You sexed it up with: Wouldn't you like to know.. :P
___________________________________________________________________________

A R E | Y O U
___________________________________________________________________________

- Understanding?: Mostly.
- Open-minded?: Yes.
- Arrogant?: Possibly.
- Insecure?: Yes.
- Random?: Sometimes.
- Hungry?: Not at the moment.
- Smart?: Yes.
- Moody?: Probably.
- Organized?: In my own way.
- Shy?: Yes.
- Difficult?: Probably.
- Bored easily?: Sometimes.
- Entertained easily?: Sometimes.
- Obsessed?: Sometimes.
- Lazy?: No.
- Angry?: Sometimes.
- Happy?: Mostly.
- Hyper?: Sometimes.
- Trusting?: Only if I know you well.
___________________________________________________________________________

R A N D O M
___________________________________________________________________________

- In the morning I: Groan, doze a little longer, turn light on to wake up, check email, get caffiene.. frequently in that order.
- I dream about: Visiting other worlds.
- What do you notice first in the sex you're into: Body shape.
___________________________________________________________________________

W H O
___________________________________________________________________________

- Makes you laugh the most: Zen, Chaos, and Mandy.
- Makes you smile: My friends.
- Gives you a funny feeling when you see him/her: You don't want to know.. it's not a good funny. My friends know who I'm talking about.. :P
___________________________________________________________________________

D O | Y O U | E V E R
___________________________________________________________________________

- Sit on the internet all night waiting for that someone special to IM you?: A couple of times.
- Wish you were a member of the opposite sex?: It might be interesting.
- Wish you were younger?: Only if I get a diffeent childhood.
- Cry because someone said something to you?: A couple of times.
___________________________________________________________________________

N U M B E R
___________________________________________________________________________

- Of times I have had my heart broken?: Maybe two.
- Of Cd's I own: About 130.
- Of scars on my body: I don't know.
- Of bones I've broken: One.

...apparently it isn't safe to do so with a few artists.

A few ground rules, for any artists who aren't courteous enough to be following these anyway....

1. My characters are © me. I reserve all rights to these characters. Drawing the character for me does not grant the artist any special rights or licenses to the characters.

2. Any special licenses or permissions granted by me are based on good faith. Misuse of images or other content featuring my characters, such as deliberate use of a character in or alongside content which would be considered abusive, demeaning, or illegal in the United States of America will not be tolerated.

3. Commercial use of my characters in any form is strictly prohibited. Any individual caught using images or other content featuring any of my characters for commercial gain without consulting me first will be reported to the appropriate authorities for IP infringement.

I decided to go, so I will be there this year...

In other news... I am convinced that my eldest cat has magical powers, as somehow she manages to get into my room, as well as leave it, without opening the door or otherwise making a sound. O_o

I think they're hiding. . I can only find one or two artists whose style is similar to what I have in my head for the pic I want done of my fursona.. and they are almost NEVER open for commissions.. and on the off chance they are (which is rarely), it's either exclusively for or at a major convention, or they put up an auction (which I have no chance of affording)..

There has to be some lesser known artists out there with a similar style... but how the hell am I supposed to find them? What I'm looking for is an artist who knows how to draw fur/fluff well, so that it flows with the image. You can see a similar effect in TaniDaReal's work, though oddly most of her work is slightly too toony for this (thankfully, since otherwise her style is too unique to find anything comparable to, and I'll probably never be able to get anything from her besides a generic print)... There are other artists who have this particular fur effect mastered, but I have apparently lost their names.

So, the kind of style I'm looking for, in general terms, is something not so whimsically toony.. more serious but still not feral/realistic.. and with a flowing type of fur and hair effect.. what would you call that..? Like, a very detailed comic book style... graphic novel style? O_o

Anyway, that's what I'm looking for.. if you see a fledgling artist out there who meets the criteria really well, or are an artist and are confident you could mimic such a style for fun, let me know! Please!

Sitting here reflecting on how some friends have talked about other friends when said other friends weren't around.. And hoping this is not going to happen to me. The way things are going I'm kind of afraid it will..

No-one feels really approachable, anymore. Sort of feels like I'm not really in the 'group', just kept around for laughs or pity or something. I dunno. I just know I'm about at the edge of my tolerance.

I'm tentatively looking for an artist who's good at doing artwork of Second Life characters. I'd like to commission an image or two of Alex and I'm not sure who might do a good job, as Alex has a complex design.

Any suggestions? Pass me a link to their gallery/portfolio if you don't mind. n.n

From  ZenFetcher 's journal.

You clicky boxes and then you post it and then I clicky your boxes.

WOULD YOU....
[_] Lock me in your room and take advantage of me?
[_] lick my cheek?
[_] miss me if we went out then broke up?
[_] dance with me?
[_] let me make you breakfast?
[_] tap me on the a**?
[_] help me with homework?
[_] tickle me to death?
[_] let me tickle you?
[_] stick up for me if i was being put down?
[_] caress my body?
[_] play strip poker with me?
[_] say yes if i asked you out?
[_] let me wear your pants? (panties? :O )
[_] get wasted with me?
[_] instant message me?
[_] greet me in public?
[_] hang out with me?
[_] bring me around your friends?

DO YOU...
[_] think im cute?
[_] think im hot?
[_] want to kiss me?
[_] want to cuddle with me?
[_] want to hook up with me?

ARE WE...
[_] acquaintances?
[_] friends?
[_] in a relationship?
[_] gonna have kids?

AM I...
[_] smart?
[_] cute?
[_] funny?
[_] cool?
[_] lovable?
[_] adorable?
[_] compassionate?
[_] annoying?
[_] great to be with?
[_] attractive?
[_] mean?
[_] odd?


HAVE YOU EVER...
[_] thought about me?
[_] thought there might be an "us"?
[_] thought about hookin' up with me?
[_] found yourself wanting a kiss from me?
[_] wished i were there?
[_] grabbed me?
[_] had a crush on me?
[_] idolized me?
[_] wanted my number?
[_] had a dream about me?
[_] been distracted by me?

ARE YOU...
[_] happy you know me?
[_] mad at me?
[_] thinkin' bout me?
[_] going to repost this in your journal so that i will return the favor

Starting now, I'm not going to play any games except sandbox type games. I don't like what it's doing to me, and I don't like what it's doing to the group of friends I've known since I was 15.

You might get an occasional round of L4D out of me... but that's it.

Lol, got this from  ZenFetcher ....

---

Appearance:
[x] = You have blue/green eyes.
[x] = You blush a lot.
[x] = You giggle.
[x] = You're quiet.
[x] = You say random silly things.
[ ] = You have a baby face.
[x] = You wear a more down to earth style of clothing.
[x] = You don't wear halter tops or anything to showy.
[ ] = Your under 5 feet 6 inches tall.
TOTAL SO FAR: 7

Innocence:
[x] = You're a virgin.
[x] = Just thinking of sexual things makes you blush.
[x] = Your idea of a date is really romantic.
[x] = You sleep with a stuffed animal.
[x] = You like to cuddle.
[x] = You've never played the Nervous game.
[x] = You don't even know what the nervous game is.

TOTAL SO FAR: 14

Colors:
[ ] = You like the color pink/light blue.
[ ] = You tend to wear bright/girly colors.

TOTAL SO FAR: 14

Personality:
[x] = You can be ignorant/oblivious.
[x] = You'd consider yourself shy.
[x] = You like happy upbeat music.
[ ] = You like "Cutesy" music.

TOTAL SO FAR: 17

What YOU think is cute:
[x] = You like small animals
[ ] = You like babies a lot.
[x] = Small/mini versions of things make you go

TOTAL: 19

Multiply how many you got by 4
Repost as: "I'm ____% Cute"
19 x 4 = 76

I'm 76% cute? :P Well, assuming appearance is talking about IRL, at least.
If we're talking about my fursona... he's 84% cute.

My classes suck, as usual, though this time they suck like high school. . bleh. I got a bunch of tune-ups done on my car, and now the new brakes are borked. Now they say I need a damned master cylinder or whatnot... holy fuck.. I would've been better off not replacing them...

*sigh* If I have to drive to MFM with bad brakes I'm gonna be pissed.

Meme thing.. got the idea from  ZenFetcher ..

----
Natural Hair Color:
[x] Brown - $100
[ ] Blonde - $50
[ ] Black - $15
[ ] Bald - $5
[ ] Other-$75

$100

Eye Color:
[ ] Brown - $1
[ ] Green - $75
[x] Blue $50
[ ] Hazel $100
[ ] Other - $15

$150

Height:
[ ] Over 7' - $200
[ ] 6'8" to 7' - $175
[x] 6'0" to 6'7" - $150
[ ] 5'5" to 5'11" - $75
[ ]4'9" to 5'4" - $45
[ ] Under 4'9 - $45

$300

Age:
[ ] 31 to 40 - $100
[ ] 26 to 30 - $75
[x] 21 to 25 - $50
[ ] 19 to 20 - $25
[ ] 0 to 18 - $100

$350

Birth Order:
[ ] Twins or more than twins - $300
[ ] First Born - $300
[ ] Only Child - $250
[ ] second born - $150
[ ] Middle child-$100
[x] Last Born - $100
[ ] third born - $100
[ ] fourth born - $100
[ ] fifth born - $100

$450

Drink?
[x] No - $400
[ ] Only Holidays - $250
[ ] Sometimes - $215
[ ] YES - $200
[ ] Only weekends - $350
[ ] Every other day - $50
[ ] Once a day - $15
[ ] I live from the bottle -$Bankrupt$

$850

Vision?
[ ] perfect vision -$300
[ ] need or have glasses/contacts but don't wear them - $200
[ ] No correction $100
[x] Glasses - $50
[ ] contacts - $25
[ ] Surgical correction - $1

$900

Car(s) Color:
[ ] Pink - $2,000
[ ] Maroon - $800
[ ] Gold - $700
[ ] Gray - $600
[ ] Blue - $900
[x] Obsdian - $800
[ ] White - $475
[ ] Red - $400
[ ] Green- $350
[ ] Silver $300
[ ] Purple- $250
[ ] Metallic - $200
[ ] Yellow - $100
[ ] Primer - $75
[ ] Tan- $20
[ ] Rusted - $15
[ ] No Car - $0
[ ] Other - $ 50

$1700

Shoe Size:
[ ] 13+ - $300
[ ]12.5 to 13 - $250
[X] 11 to 12 - $700
[ ] 7 to 10 - $500
[ ] Under 7- $550

$2400

Favorite Color(s):
[X] Black - $450
[X] Green-$750
[ ] Red - $600
[ ] Yellow -$475
[ ] Brown - $50
[X] Purple - $225
[ ] White - $400
[X] Aqua - $350
[ ] Orange - $300
[X] Blue - $300
[ ] Pink - $100

$4475

Did you use a calculator to add it all up?
[ ] Yes - $0
[X]no- $1000
[ ] on some - $550




Total: $5475

REPOST WITH TITLE:
"I cost $____ a night"

Boredom + Kitteh = Meme XP

[01] Do you have the guts to answer these questions and re-post as The Controversial Survey?
Yus, obviously. I wouldn't be doing it otherwise.

[02] Would you do meth if it was legalized?
Oh hell no. O_o

[03] Abortion: for or against it?
For. But with limitations to prevent its abuse.

[04] Do you think a country would fail with a female president?
No. And given the state of the country now, maybe we should try it sometime.

[05] Do you believe in the death penalty?
No, but I believe in poetic justice for those who don't regret what they did. ;)

[06] Do you wish marijuana would be legalized already?
Yes. Criminalizing it is expensive and just silly. Legalize and tax it.

[07] Are you for or against premarital sex?
Go ahead and screw all you want. Just don't go around spreading diseases or end up on welfare with 8 children, mmkay?

[08] Do you believe in God?
Yes. No. Yes and No. Neither yes nor no. But to which version of the Creator do you refer?

[09] Do you think same sex marriage should be legalized?
What is the government doing endorsing a religious ceremony, anyway? I'd say, that if they'r going to endorse one, they should endorse them all. Otherwise it violates the separation of church and state.

[10] Do you think it's wrong that so many Hispanics are illegally moving to the USA?
I wouldn't know without asking them why they're doing it. The answer to this question is not so black and white as it seems.

[11] A twelve year old girl has a baby, should she keep it?
The family of the girl should take care of and raise the baby.

[12] Should the alcohol age be lowered to eighteen?
Yes. The stats that they based raising the drinking age on did not change. They just shifted to an older age group. So obviously, raising it didn't help anything.

[13] Should the war in Iraq be called off?
If it's still going on, then yes. Also, get Blackwater out of there. They aren't helping.

[14] Assisted suicide is illegal: do you agree?
Given certain conditions, no. A person should be able to end their life if they're already expected to die, and wish for any reason to die sooner, provided they are of sound mind and have a logical motivation for doing so.

[15] Do you believe in spanking your children?
No. I believe in guidance, not classical conditioning.

[16] Would you burn an American flag for a million dollars?
Yes. It's just a flag. And you can do a lot of good with a million dollars.

[17] Who do you think would have made a better president?
Some person who actually has a clue what the average American's life is like.

[18] Are you afraid others will judge you from reading some of your answers?
If they're going to judge me for my opinion, which is just my opinion and mine alone, then I didn't want to associate with them anyway.

I have absolutely nothing thoughtful to say....

That is all.