I'll be an old man in a wheelchair with a Texas sized beef. Crow and his gang can go straight to Hell. Do not pass go. Do not collect $200!

My mother just passed away and I think it's really done a number on me psychologically. Have not slept even though I am tired and was up all night. I'm just kinda numb. I don't have many friends because I will be the first to tell you I'm not a very likable person. I guess I just have to tough this out.

Okay, I guess I can explain a little bit better the things that set up one of the most bitter feuds I have ever had with a human being.

Years ago I was involved in an online project. I had friends in this project or at least I thought I did. Things went south quickly when I became a victim of a sociopath. But that's a story for another time. I eventually found myself exiled from the community and project after a bitter falling out with some of the staff.

But at first I just tried to roll with it.

Not the end of the world I thought. I made an attempt to attend a livestream ran by these individuals. Things went to Hell quickly when the head artist found out I was in the chat and said some unpleasant things about me over a hot mic by accident. It became clear that I was no longer welcome even REMOTELY near this community.

So I just logged out pretty much never to return. But I did try logging into the game connected to this community one last time.

I could not.

Apparently this individual wasn't content with just trash talking me in front of the community. He had to go rage-delete my account too. Even though in time I received an email informing me the account was restored after a few days passed I'd pretty much declared war on the son of a bitch at that point. I hate him, he hates me. And that's how it's gotta be I guess. And I wish him the absolute worst.

I really need to get around to getting some treatment I think. I just kind of sit around hating everything and waiting for the world to be destroyed perhaps as some kind of mercy. And I so badly want the last five years of my life back. :( And I hope somewhere... Somewhere down the line the people that helped do this to me get theirs. I hope they get theirs in a big way.

This one goes out to my friends out west!
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-uW_U8Kgw2g

Most forms of internet allow you to 'wish somebody into the cornfield' if you get annoyed which means you can just make them vanish. So I won't waste the valuable time I have left arguing and posturing. Somebody gets under my skin and it's just as easy as John DeLancie snapping his fingers.

PS: Doesn't mean I am sick or dying or shit like that. I mean I am getting close to 40 now and life is just too short to joust against inflated egos.

Well, it was a rather subdued birthday. I didn't really feel like celebrating much and I have no real friends close by on the same schedule as me. Met my brother, mother and sister and we had a bit of a nice time at a Mexican place.

This is gonna be a rough one. By my own admission I am not a very likable person so most of the day will be spent alone and reflecting.

Finally warming up here and I got some good news for a change!

I finally made it. Guess I am officially Old™. No more smokin', no more drinkin'. And oddly I don't miss either of those. Later I am gonna buy a cake and have it all to myself. :3

Happy 2016. I made it! After being forced from my previous residence last March due to a renovation I am settled just fine here. Great neighbors, good terms with the landlord and life is much better in general.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=nCQGQ5qBQTA

As a group me and several others meet and help out to do charity work around the city. Well, unfortunately on Saturday we ended up helping somebody who turned out to be the LEAST deserving of any charity whatsoever.


Yeah, it was bad. Like reallllly bad. Don't read on if you are sensitive or in a sad mood.




























We were raking leaves and cleaning gutters at three selected properties. When we reached the second property the group had split up because we were out of yard waste bags. We moved to the third house to start raking piles while two in our group stayed behind on the second house to wait for the additional bags to be delivered. Then they could finish up filling bags and rejoin us. Well when they showed up at the third house they were not happy.

In the back of the second house was something I am glad I didn't see. As they were finishing they cleared away some brush and uncovered a fenced in dog house. The dog house was unfortunately long abandoned... But not vacant.

There is absolutely no excuse for doing that to an animal. None. So pictures were taken and passed on the the volunteer company. And from there they'll go to the city.

That dog waited for somebody that never came. It makes my blood boil thinking about how terrible and lonely that must have been. The sheer despair the animal endured as it wasted away. At least now hopefully the owner of that house will never be able to hurt an animal like that again. I'm not normally a guy who gets upset about things but that was fucking brutal. Holy shit.

Just lost like every friend I ever had. How was your day? :D

I feel fucking numb, man.

Birthday had to come around the same time I'm having a falling out with pretty much everyone I know who isn't a relative. As a result of pride I am just kind of spending my birthday alone and kind of numb. I don't drink anymore and I don't smoke now either so it's especially unpleasant. I'm just kinda sitting in my computer chair staring at the walls. My entire social life was pretty much talking to these guys and that's fuck all now.

I found out that my downstairs neighbor and long time drinking buddy has passed on. Me, Art and another neighbor sort of had a 'Fellowship of the Misfits' thing going on. The neighbor moved away and now Art is gone. I knew he was obviously very, very sick but I didn't know how bad. Thinking of leaving some flowers by his door in a shrine of sorts. :(

I was coming home from the blood bank and when I pulled into my lot a driver in an SUV came in a few minutes later.

I noticed he had a big bag on his car. Looked like groceries. Had this man forgotten his bag on his car? Shit happens.

I try and wave to him to get his attention. He gets out of his SUV, picks up the bag and THROWS IT IN OUR DUMPSTER.

It wasn't just a happy accident. This dude placed his trash on top of his ride and drove down a busy street in rush hour traffic. No tiedowns, bungee cords. Nothing. Just gravity and prayers!

I admit I went to the dumpster to lift up the bag with a mop handle. It was completely clear so I could see all the contents. Just a bunch of food garbage. Nothing identifying or I would have tried to get Einstein's address.

I always wanted the moon and now I can have the next best thing!

http://ssd.jpl.nasa.gov/sbdb.cgi?sstr=2014%20HQ124&orb=1

Flies by on June 8th, which is my birthday!

Now all I have to do is figure out how to lasso it...

The anticipated Cameleopardis shower was complete and utter fail.

I had been waiting two weeks for this thing.

I'm hearing a few grumblings already in comment sections. This should get interesting in a few hours when a lot of cold, mosquito bite riddled people vent.

And my computer chair broke in a hilariously violent fashion due to shoddy design. Broken in such a way that it can not be even jerry rigged.

A two hundred dollar chair lasted three years and broke like a Sumo Wrestler had been bouncing on it.

I weigh all of 165 so I am trying to figure out how my body was putting that much stress on the joists!

I was sorting out some checks where I work and there was this ancient savings bond in with the work. It had been burned pretty badly but it was still holding together. The bond was made out to one Elizabeth Bartlett in the year 1953. I was like 'Oh no, she died in a fire! The angry ghost of Elizabeth Bartlett is coming for my soul!

Everybody had a laugh.

So a month later and I was dumping the older processed checks in the trash. We have millions of them to throw away into shred bins as they are headed for their destiny with a document shredder truck. I emptied a random tray into the open bin and... A savings bond flew out and landed on my foot.

It was badly burned. And made out to one Elizabeth Bartlett...


She's gonna come out of my bathroom mirror, isn't she?

So I just had seven grand worth of work done. Thankfully my post insurance contribution was six hundred.

I went in to get one tooth out and that turned into all four wisdom teeth. I hurt now and I am stuck with eating mashed potatoes and soup for four days and nothing with rice or 'little bits' for a week.

After I stop at the store for said soup and mashed potatoes I will take a couple more of my Happy Pills and take in a movie.

Today was going to be a good day...

I was preparing to purchase treats for a co-worker's going away party for today. I rounded a corner and saw a smiling lady with free samples. Not ever expecting these samples to be anything BUT free I bit into one. I immediately got a weird but familiar sensation in my mouth.

That horrible gritty substance you just KNOW used to be up until then a large part of your tooth.

I ran to the bathroom in the store after feeling the awful, rough, jagged gap where that piece had been and looked in the mirror. Oh yeah it was bad. Oh yeah, it was nightmarishly bad.

The tooth had been bad for a long, long time. I had been planning on tending to it in June. It didn't wait. And on Friday afternoon too. I had to HURRY.

I found a dentist who would take pity on me first try. Then I had to find her office before she left for the evening. Easier said than done. But I finally managed to find her office and after some fidgeting she saw to inspecting the damages.

The tooth needs lots of love. A root canal. But that's not the scary part. The scary part is I am very ill and didn't even know it due to a 'silent killer' infection ravaging me. I guess this explains why I have been so tired lately.

So they gave me some penicillin which should clear this up by Monday when I get drillinated.

I bought a new tablet and decided I needed a case for the thing. Fingerprints are bad. Water is worse.

One big problem quickly cropped up.

The tablet is a Nexus 7. It's a wonderful little gizmo. That's not the issue. The issue is 'Apple Happened'.

So how does Apple dick with you when you don't even own an Apple product? Well, they took a play from the old Nintendo Playbook: Strong arm the holy fuck out of retailers to only stock your accessories.

If you have purchased a tablet or phone you may have been there. Rows and rows of Apple accessories and absolutely nothing but. Apple may be unable to completely stop retailers from selling competitor's devices but they sure make your life a living Hell if you want to buy accessories for them.

So having a family emergency and just figured doing what everybody else does and sharing it with strangers.

I may take the day off of work tomorrow but Nothing Fun At All™ about it. I am preparing to be called a lot of bad words.

PM me if you are curious and wish to know. I am still so 20th century in the respect that private issues should be discussed in discrete terms.

Well, shit.

I just found out I am smack dab in the middle of the 'Red Zone' for this thing.

http://www.weather.com/

*Mwah!* Goodnight everybody!

But seriously this is kind of freaking me out. I have no emergency plans here.

Yaaaaaaaaaaay! It's minor but I finally get to have some issues fixed.

Still got my short story to finish but that depends on how comfortable I am sitting.