so this amazing woman sent me a new tablet mine broke i was trying to get it working with my new computer when it moved the cursor for the last time. so be prepared ill be opening up commissions to pay this lovely lady back and try and get some extra as i am struggling to get by.

went to a concert last month the opening act as audery burne. well they are awesome a local band from saginaw i will be at the concert on the 30th of this month too. please watch them subscribe and like. they are really good musicians and friends.


https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=uEP.....QKX8i8RCOcVZ8M

i am back online. i dont know how to put what i have been trough or even if i should. just know that my son and me are safe.

so i got this tablet over 5 years ago for under 50 needless to say its a bit dated i never thought it wouldn't work when i got a new computer i need to get a new on till then i feel my art will be less then id like it to be i really do not know how i will afford a new one or what kind would be best though with my preferences it has to be around the size of a sheet of paper

so a few of you know i have had a long drawn out fight i guess now war with my moms yes moms. so whats up? I have CPS on me again!!! for moving away from the BS -.- technically i am homeless well i look for a place and a job up here i am staying with friends and family. SO DRAMA. plus to top it off they are now calling me again and saying things like i am hartless soulless and a lier... needless to say i am fed up with it all. cant wait to get my own place and never post my address for them or anyone to see -.-

i need to get out of this mind set so i wanna do a few trades they may take some time before i am done with my half. but drawing for others seems to work well for me. so id love to trade please 0.0

finally got internet back after my last post.
as far as how i am doing or feeling..... i am alive, moved into a new place.... away from where that happened... i am back to work, my old car broke so i needed to get a loan for a new one. my card number got used by someone else and i ended up 500 in the hole. CPS got called on me. some folk are blaming me for what mike had done. and my mom ended up in the hospital. when it rains it pours.

today mike killed himself less the 20 feet from me with a gun. i am not ok

off to be professionally reprimanded by my stepmom/boss/landlord over missing i time sheet and losing my password. in the morning i might be homeless and jobless. and you know i might be happier without that woman in my life. but what can i do for me?

so everyone is talking about this game and it sounds like a fun idea to get out walking more often with my son. PROBLEM my phone can't do apps it is a flip phone with minimal features and like no memory. and i think you may need a camera that works on it to do that game anyways... so i am actually thinking of upgrading phones but i do not know anything about them plus i don't have alot of cash just to throw at things. so suggestions?

just as the tittle says i am looking for a girlfriend i have always considered myself bi but i have had little experiences with woman so i really don't know how to start perhaps this is the best way. please note me if you have any interest.

ANY ART for just $10

WHY? well i wanna get a good cosplay outfit before Halloween of sally. also mike wants to be Jack. my son is gonna be the dog for some reason i forgot his name o.o

it is a question i ask often.who am i? what am i? what i am to others? how am i viewed, or how do i view myself?

i know my stats
i am 30, female, bi, brunette, 5'3", 165 lb, size 12, 36C, above average IQ.
But who am i under those stats? what am i?
i art. i play games. i am a mom. but who am i? the mom was forced. my son was a rape baby. my home job and lively hood are all controlled by my step mom. who in her way thinks she is helping but in fact she is killing who i am. but then again who am i? i seem to only live to make others happy but in turn i loose who i am. i fear, i wounder, i wish. i wan't freedom to be me. but WHO AM I? i never let myself be me cause then i would be free. but in turn i could loose everything. my home my job they are owned by a force i can not control. and who controls me. should i move or would the guilt kill me? should i quit? or would the grief overwhelm me? my home she bought for me. mortgaged her home for it. my job to take care of my elderly grandma. who may not have much time left on earth. but can i keep this up to live in this cage forever? do i belong here? is this how i must be? must i fit into HER social norms? i just wish i had some clue of what is right for me.

i lack it so i would like some tips and tricks to help with it. i recently started exercising daily. i am looking into possibly a wardrobe change and maybe a new hair style. but i know self confidence is more then looks it is deeper so i'd like some advice on the matter is there anything that you do to make yourself feel worth wile? or some simple exercises that help that you might know of. i am open to all advice and ideas.

perhaps i do suck at life. i wish just one month could go uneventful. today i left for work zane and mike where asleep so i thought nothing of it i left a note for zane to watch a movie. my plan was to come back in two hours and check up. well needless to say zane woke up and didn't wish to do as he was asked. instead i found grandma and told her that he was alone hadn't eaten and cried. so here comes my mom to bitch me out, you know at 8 i was walking myself to coldsprings park without anyone there with me.

i will always FA yea i am not going anywhere. but i do have a tumbler http://vampirekat2000.tumblr.com/ i am on more now. and i have a devent art >.> but i forget often i think i have a weasel but i don't know anymore. 0.0 i can go anywhere but i am comfy here.

another birthday ending with me face down in a pillow to dry my tears. as i cry myself to sleep. happy birth day to me i sing to myself as very few people bothered to so much as say hi. then the other things where just to much. i am just so stupid for thinking anything would be better... my life just needs to suck so i need to just get over it. and not feel any more.

on the 19th is the day i lock myself up and hope it goes away my dreaded birthday. this year i turn 30. i do hope it is just a boring day and nothing bad happens. anywho i think i will treat myself to a nap. maybe make some pie.

my uncle died. i knew it was going to happen someday. he was on kidney dialysis for a wile but a few months ago it was not longer enough he asked to be taken off of dialysis to attempt to enjoy his remaining time with family. today zane got beat up at school and my have a black eye soon you can see a bruise under his eye.
another day in the life eh?

I often forget all i need to do. so ok hopefully i will have some time tomorrow to art >.> i guess i just gotta wait till other people can take care of themselfs <.< though i can't picture that happening any time soon. any who i should have some artz done this weekend ^.^ so thank you for waiting.

so what everyone of you wounderful people payed for is as fallows
$200 ER visit
$180 X-ray
and somewhere around $20 of gause, tape, and sterile pads

thank you i don't have the bill for the orthopedic doctor yet but that was a short visit with very happy results.

Thank you so much honestly you all are awesome.

zanes finger is not broke. his orthopedic doc took a look he is doing wonderful his nail should grow back in a few months but right now zane is doing good. thank you everyone.

today zanes school called at first i was afraid he had misbehaved then i found out something worse. Zane had his hand shut in a locker. Broke the finger ripped the nail mostly off. they manually removed the bulk of the nail but there was still bits of nail in side his finger he will need surgery to remove them.

Though i do not think his insurance will pay for it all. so help please i really do not know what else to do.

i haven't been doing so hot lately and it has killed my drive to do art. so i think i may try some freebees.
leave a reference i might draw you
BUT i do not know haw many i will do this is not first come first serve. i will draw what inspires me. so if you wanna drop an idea please feel free. hopefully this gets me back into doing art more often.

my brother recorded himself replacing my fan
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8Sm.....;feature=share
hopefully my computers problem was just that. as it shut down randomly i am thinking from over heating.