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General | Posted a month agoAs of today, I will no longer be active on FA, I will be mainly active on discord and kept to myself. It was fun while it lasted.
To whomever called the Game Wardens
General | Posted a month agoI am not an animal abuser. My animals are very well cared for—fed, healthy, active, and thriving. I’ve spent years learning, building proper setups, and making sure every one of them is given the best life possible. You don’t get to twist that into something ugly because of rumors or assumptions given to you by my malicious exes.
Yes, I had to put one animal down, and it wrecked me. I spiraled hard because I care. I’m not some heartless person who shrugs that off—I broke down over it. Like I do anytime an animal of mine gets hurt, sick, etc.
And let’s be real: a lot of what I said or did during that time came from being in a bad mental place. My uncle’s actions and what happened surrounding that situation put me in a dark, self-destructive mindset. I wasn’t thinking clearly. I was angry, hurt, and unstable, and I said things I shouldn’t have. But I’ve grown since then. I’ve worked on myself and my animals never suffered because of it. I know its not an excuse, but its a catalyst.
As for the permit issue, I was told—by multiple people I’ve worked under and trusted—that certain species could be collected within limits. I followed what I believed was correct information. There was never bad intent or neglect. Just misunderstanding.
So whoever decided to send a false, anonymous tip to the warden accusing me of abuse—you crossed a line. That’s harassment, and it’s disgusting. My animals are not abused. They’re thriving.
I’ve taken accountability. I’ve owned up to my mistakes. But dragging me through the mud for something that isn’t true—again—is exhausting.
This is your final warning: stop. If this harassment and defamation continue, I will get a lawyer involved. I’m done being treated like a monster when all I’ve ever done is love and care for the animals I keep.
Yes, I had to put one animal down, and it wrecked me. I spiraled hard because I care. I’m not some heartless person who shrugs that off—I broke down over it. Like I do anytime an animal of mine gets hurt, sick, etc.
And let’s be real: a lot of what I said or did during that time came from being in a bad mental place. My uncle’s actions and what happened surrounding that situation put me in a dark, self-destructive mindset. I wasn’t thinking clearly. I was angry, hurt, and unstable, and I said things I shouldn’t have. But I’ve grown since then. I’ve worked on myself and my animals never suffered because of it. I know its not an excuse, but its a catalyst.
As for the permit issue, I was told—by multiple people I’ve worked under and trusted—that certain species could be collected within limits. I followed what I believed was correct information. There was never bad intent or neglect. Just misunderstanding.
So whoever decided to send a false, anonymous tip to the warden accusing me of abuse—you crossed a line. That’s harassment, and it’s disgusting. My animals are not abused. They’re thriving.
I’ve taken accountability. I’ve owned up to my mistakes. But dragging me through the mud for something that isn’t true—again—is exhausting.
This is your final warning: stop. If this harassment and defamation continue, I will get a lawyer involved. I’m done being treated like a monster when all I’ve ever done is love and care for the animals I keep.
Throne link - reptile upgrades
General | Posted a month agohttps://throne.com/wiltedboa/collec.....ptile-overhaul
If anyone is interested in helping me upgrade all of my animals while I pay back refunds, debt , etc
If anyone is interested in helping me upgrade all of my animals while I pay back refunds, debt , etc
All clients reached out to (I hope) & first Tshot
General | Posted a month agoI have reached out to most of my clients, if I have missed you please DM me or email me :
Willobonez[at]gmail.com
So far as majority of my clients are okay with waiting for art as they understand my situation. I will be sending out refunds and assessing who all I do 100% want to finish over the next month.
That being said , I just started HRT and took my first Testosterone shot today, feeling good and working towards being my truest self.
Thanks for the patience and care.
Willobonez[at]gmail.com
So far as majority of my clients are okay with waiting for art as they understand my situation. I will be sending out refunds and assessing who all I do 100% want to finish over the next month.
That being said , I just started HRT and took my first Testosterone shot today, feeling good and working towards being my truest self.
Thanks for the patience and care.
A Basic update
General | Posted 2 months agoI will be starting refunds at the end of next month. After I settle into my job I will be reaching out to people and getting all the details. After I get 50% through my refunds I will reevaluate and decide who all I WILL be finishing and if I rather send out partial/full refunds for atuff such as bundles.
Please be patient while I get everything organized.
Please be patient while I get everything organized.
Wanna support my animals care?
General | Posted 2 months agoI started a job, yeah, but for a bit I will still be forced to focus on debts, and I really want to redo the heating and enclosures for my animals since it is due time for that. So here is an Amazon list if anyone wants to buy a thing and help me care for my babies!
https://a.co/eq8LdtL
(Even willing to payback in a way at a later date to help move this along especially for the heating and lighting supplies)
https://a.co/eq8LdtL
(Even willing to payback in a way at a later date to help move this along especially for the heating and lighting supplies)
REFUND PLAN AND HUGE UPDATE
General | Posted 2 months agoHello everyone,
It’s about time I finally talk about all of this properly. I’ve sat with these thoughts for a while, trying to find the right words and the right time — and after taking a much-needed mental health break, I finally feel ready to approach it with a clearer head and calmer perspective. This post is going to be long, but I think it’s important that I go over everything — my current life situation, my personal and commission-related debt, the changes happening behind the scenes, and what my plans are going forward. I want to be transparent and genuine about what’s going on.
---
For a little over three years, I was completely unemployed. It was one of the hardest periods of my life, not only financially but mentally. When you spend that long struggling to stay afloat, constantly worrying about bills, obligations, and the people waiting on you, it takes a toll in ways that are hard to put into words. There were days where even creating art — something that once brought me so much joy — felt like a reminder of everything I was falling behind on.
But there’s finally some light at the end of that tunnel. As of October 10th, 2025, I officially have a job again! It’s a position I’ve worked before, one that I genuinely enjoy and feel comfortable with. It’s familiar, steady, and something I can see myself sticking with long-term. For the first time in a long while, I can finally breathe knowing I’ll have consistent income again.
This change is huge for me, not just financially but mentally. It means I can start to realistically plan instead of constantly trying to survive on uncertainty. It means I can stop overpromising what I can’t deliver and start taking practical, steady steps toward fixing what I owe and moving forward with stability.
---
I want to be completely transparent here. I have two types of debt: personal debt and commission debt.
My personal debt has been piling up over time, and because of late fees and interest, it’s become something I can’t ignore. But because of the fear of something going wrong if I ever lose my income again. My first priority will be to pay down my personal debt until it’s at a manageable point. That’s not because I’m ignoring commissions, but because clearing that weight gives me room to handle commissions responsibly without worrying about bills breathing down my neck.
Once that’s handled, I can shift full focus toward refunds and art completion.
---
Refunds will begin no later than December, depending on how quickly my personal payments are resolved. I’ll be dedicating roughly $150–$200 from each paycheck directly toward refunds. This will be a slow but steady process — consistent and manageable.
Alongside that, I’ll also be setting aside some funds for an important personal project: building a dedicated space for my reptiles and upgrading them to larger enclosures. My reptiles are a big part of my life, and they’ve helped me through some of my lowest points.
So yes, part of my income will go to them — because I believe in balancing responsibility with the things that bring me purpose.
---
Now, about commissions. Mentally, I’ve been struggling a lot, and on top of that, I’ve been dealing with physical pain that limits how long I can draw. Some days I can only manage an hour or two of work before I have to stop. It’s frustrating, especially when I want to do so much more, but it’s my reality right now. Because of that, art production will remain slow for the foreseeable future.
To handle things fairly, I’ll be refunding the following types of commissions first:
-Pieces that have not been started at all
-Pieces that are only in the sketch stage
-Pieces that have not had recent updates
-Bundles
I know the last point may raise eyebrows, since bundles involve a lot of art. My reasoning is this: I want to clear smaller, less expensive pieces first so more people get closure sooner. For bundles, I’ll be offering partial refunds instead of full ones, at least initially, so I can reduce my total owed work while still honoring part of what’s been paid for. Once I’m financially stronger and healthier, I can revisit completing or refunding those in full.
I’m not overwhelming myself with big projects, but I’m still making visible progress and honoring commitments.
---
I also want to acknowledge that the past few years have been incredibly hard on me emotionally. There were long stretches of burnout, guilt, and anxiety over everything I owed. It became a cycle — the more I worried about it, the harder it was to create or communicate, and the harder it was to fix things.
Now, I’m in a more grounded place. I’m not “fully better,” but I’m stable enough to rebuild — to make plans that stick. I’ve learned that accountability doesn’t mean rushing yourself into another breakdown; it means taking responsibility and taking care of yourself at the same time. That’s what I’m doing now.
---
From here, the plan is as so:
1. Pay off personal debt to remove financial stress and late fees.
2. Begin refund rollouts starting around December.
3. Set aside consistent refund funds ($150–$200 per paycheck).
4. Provide progress updates as I move forward — both on refunds and any art that’s still ongoing.
5. Continue improving my reptiles’ care setup, because that’s part of my quality of life too.
***
I know this has been a long time coming, and I know many of you have been waiting patiently for far too long. To everyone who has stuck by me — thank you. Your patience, understanding, and trust mean more than I can say. I’m not going to make excuses for how slow things have been, but I do want you to know that I’ve never forgotten my obligations or taken them lightly.
I will be working through all of my owed art and putting them on a list that will be made public to show my progress of refunds. If you'd like to help speed up the process please fill out the below Google forms.
https://wiltedboa.straw.page/debtpaybackplan
Thank you.
It’s about time I finally talk about all of this properly. I’ve sat with these thoughts for a while, trying to find the right words and the right time — and after taking a much-needed mental health break, I finally feel ready to approach it with a clearer head and calmer perspective. This post is going to be long, but I think it’s important that I go over everything — my current life situation, my personal and commission-related debt, the changes happening behind the scenes, and what my plans are going forward. I want to be transparent and genuine about what’s going on.
---
For a little over three years, I was completely unemployed. It was one of the hardest periods of my life, not only financially but mentally. When you spend that long struggling to stay afloat, constantly worrying about bills, obligations, and the people waiting on you, it takes a toll in ways that are hard to put into words. There were days where even creating art — something that once brought me so much joy — felt like a reminder of everything I was falling behind on.
But there’s finally some light at the end of that tunnel. As of October 10th, 2025, I officially have a job again! It’s a position I’ve worked before, one that I genuinely enjoy and feel comfortable with. It’s familiar, steady, and something I can see myself sticking with long-term. For the first time in a long while, I can finally breathe knowing I’ll have consistent income again.
This change is huge for me, not just financially but mentally. It means I can start to realistically plan instead of constantly trying to survive on uncertainty. It means I can stop overpromising what I can’t deliver and start taking practical, steady steps toward fixing what I owe and moving forward with stability.
---
I want to be completely transparent here. I have two types of debt: personal debt and commission debt.
My personal debt has been piling up over time, and because of late fees and interest, it’s become something I can’t ignore. But because of the fear of something going wrong if I ever lose my income again. My first priority will be to pay down my personal debt until it’s at a manageable point. That’s not because I’m ignoring commissions, but because clearing that weight gives me room to handle commissions responsibly without worrying about bills breathing down my neck.
Once that’s handled, I can shift full focus toward refunds and art completion.
---
Refunds will begin no later than December, depending on how quickly my personal payments are resolved. I’ll be dedicating roughly $150–$200 from each paycheck directly toward refunds. This will be a slow but steady process — consistent and manageable.
Alongside that, I’ll also be setting aside some funds for an important personal project: building a dedicated space for my reptiles and upgrading them to larger enclosures. My reptiles are a big part of my life, and they’ve helped me through some of my lowest points.
So yes, part of my income will go to them — because I believe in balancing responsibility with the things that bring me purpose.
---
Now, about commissions. Mentally, I’ve been struggling a lot, and on top of that, I’ve been dealing with physical pain that limits how long I can draw. Some days I can only manage an hour or two of work before I have to stop. It’s frustrating, especially when I want to do so much more, but it’s my reality right now. Because of that, art production will remain slow for the foreseeable future.
To handle things fairly, I’ll be refunding the following types of commissions first:
-Pieces that have not been started at all
-Pieces that are only in the sketch stage
-Pieces that have not had recent updates
-Bundles
I know the last point may raise eyebrows, since bundles involve a lot of art. My reasoning is this: I want to clear smaller, less expensive pieces first so more people get closure sooner. For bundles, I’ll be offering partial refunds instead of full ones, at least initially, so I can reduce my total owed work while still honoring part of what’s been paid for. Once I’m financially stronger and healthier, I can revisit completing or refunding those in full.
I’m not overwhelming myself with big projects, but I’m still making visible progress and honoring commitments.
---
I also want to acknowledge that the past few years have been incredibly hard on me emotionally. There were long stretches of burnout, guilt, and anxiety over everything I owed. It became a cycle — the more I worried about it, the harder it was to create or communicate, and the harder it was to fix things.
Now, I’m in a more grounded place. I’m not “fully better,” but I’m stable enough to rebuild — to make plans that stick. I’ve learned that accountability doesn’t mean rushing yourself into another breakdown; it means taking responsibility and taking care of yourself at the same time. That’s what I’m doing now.
---
From here, the plan is as so:
1. Pay off personal debt to remove financial stress and late fees.
2. Begin refund rollouts starting around December.
3. Set aside consistent refund funds ($150–$200 per paycheck).
4. Provide progress updates as I move forward — both on refunds and any art that’s still ongoing.
5. Continue improving my reptiles’ care setup, because that’s part of my quality of life too.
***
I know this has been a long time coming, and I know many of you have been waiting patiently for far too long. To everyone who has stuck by me — thank you. Your patience, understanding, and trust mean more than I can say. I’m not going to make excuses for how slow things have been, but I do want you to know that I’ve never forgotten my obligations or taken them lightly.
I will be working through all of my owed art and putting them on a list that will be made public to show my progress of refunds. If you'd like to help speed up the process please fill out the below Google forms.
https://wiltedboa.straw.page/debtpaybackplan
Thank you.
VRchat comms open!
General | Posted 2 months agoCurrently planning to refund most of my 2D art commissions, so I am taking limited slots for VRchat commissions. If interested, fill out the form below:
https://forms.gle/6FkV2chdZhRYZBzu7
****
General Info
All commissions at this stage are considered Artistic Freedom Customs.
This means I will be creating models based on your theme, moodboard, or character type, while maintaining my own artistic interpretation.
I currently do not accept complex or highly specific pre-existing OCs unless they already fit one of my bases at least 90%.
Examples:
✅ If your OC is a standard Sun model with simple changes (such as a cat tail, horns, or minor color variations), I can absolutely create that.
⚠️ If your OC features complex modifications, sculpted features, or rare bases, please contact me first to discuss feasibility.
If we proceed, understand that some details may need to be simplified or stylized.
This limitation exists because I am not currently sculpting.
I am still learning that process, and I prefer to deliver high-quality results within my current scope of ability. As I grow more comfortable with sculpting and base modifications, this policy will be updated.
---
Pricing
Base price: $60 USD (flat rate)
Includes:
-Full color edits
-Extreme base edits (within reason)
-Audio-linked markings, emissions, and particles
-Thematic designs (demonic, celestial, myth, etc.)
-Furry, humanoid, or DCA-style models
-NSFW/SPS when applicable
Extra costs apply if:
-The requested assets are pay-to-use
-You want a base I do not own
-You request SPS plugin setup
-you ask for animated eyes, torso, etc (gifs applied to texture such as hypno eyes or lava lamp effect)
If an extra fee is needed, you will only pay the exact cost of the asset — no upcharge.
Example: a $5 tail = +$5 added to your total.
That being said, feel free to look on Gumroad,Nexxy, etc to find assets (tails, jewelry, etc) you may want me to use.
---
Supported Bases
-Goldskvm Base (Sun, Moon, Eclipse — Naga option available) <note, doesnt work with alot of clothing>
-Metronome Naptime Moon / Racer Sun
-Any free-use bases (DCA, furry, humanoid, etc.)
---
Work Process
I open 4 slots per month.
Each commission is finished by the end of that month.
I provide progress updates and will fix small things (color changes, glow tweaks, etc.) anytime after completion.
---
Avatar Uploads
Unity files will not be provided to clients.
I will upload the avatar directly to your VRChat account.
You’ll need to temporarily let me log in to your account to complete the upload.
All avatars are private by default, but can be made public upon request.
---
Refund Policy
Refunds are only available until the first preview is sent.
After the first preview, no refunds will be issued unless I cancel the project.
If a refund is approved, please allow 2–4 weeks to process due to personal and financial reasons.
---
Usage & Credit
You may not resell, trade, or reupload the avatar or assets.
You may showcase your avatar anywhere (VRChat, YouTube, TikTok, etc.) with proper credit:
> “Avatar edits by WiltedBoa, base by [username here].”
All assets remain under their original creators’ licenses.
---
Final Notes
I reserve the right to decline any project.
Harassment or rushing will result in cancellation without refund.
By commissioning me, you agree to these terms in full.
https://forms.gle/6FkV2chdZhRYZBzu7
****
General Info
All commissions at this stage are considered Artistic Freedom Customs.
This means I will be creating models based on your theme, moodboard, or character type, while maintaining my own artistic interpretation.
I currently do not accept complex or highly specific pre-existing OCs unless they already fit one of my bases at least 90%.
Examples:
✅ If your OC is a standard Sun model with simple changes (such as a cat tail, horns, or minor color variations), I can absolutely create that.
⚠️ If your OC features complex modifications, sculpted features, or rare bases, please contact me first to discuss feasibility.
If we proceed, understand that some details may need to be simplified or stylized.
This limitation exists because I am not currently sculpting.
I am still learning that process, and I prefer to deliver high-quality results within my current scope of ability. As I grow more comfortable with sculpting and base modifications, this policy will be updated.
---
Pricing
Base price: $60 USD (flat rate)
Includes:
-Full color edits
-Extreme base edits (within reason)
-Audio-linked markings, emissions, and particles
-Thematic designs (demonic, celestial, myth, etc.)
-Furry, humanoid, or DCA-style models
-NSFW/SPS when applicable
Extra costs apply if:
-The requested assets are pay-to-use
-You want a base I do not own
-You request SPS plugin setup
-you ask for animated eyes, torso, etc (gifs applied to texture such as hypno eyes or lava lamp effect)
If an extra fee is needed, you will only pay the exact cost of the asset — no upcharge.
Example: a $5 tail = +$5 added to your total.
That being said, feel free to look on Gumroad,Nexxy, etc to find assets (tails, jewelry, etc) you may want me to use.
---
Supported Bases
-Goldskvm Base (Sun, Moon, Eclipse — Naga option available) <note, doesnt work with alot of clothing>
-Metronome Naptime Moon / Racer Sun
-Any free-use bases (DCA, furry, humanoid, etc.)
---
Work Process
I open 4 slots per month.
Each commission is finished by the end of that month.
I provide progress updates and will fix small things (color changes, glow tweaks, etc.) anytime after completion.
---
Avatar Uploads
Unity files will not be provided to clients.
I will upload the avatar directly to your VRChat account.
You’ll need to temporarily let me log in to your account to complete the upload.
All avatars are private by default, but can be made public upon request.
---
Refund Policy
Refunds are only available until the first preview is sent.
After the first preview, no refunds will be issued unless I cancel the project.
If a refund is approved, please allow 2–4 weeks to process due to personal and financial reasons.
---
Usage & Credit
You may not resell, trade, or reupload the avatar or assets.
You may showcase your avatar anywhere (VRChat, YouTube, TikTok, etc.) with proper credit:
> “Avatar edits by WiltedBoa, base by [username here].”
All assets remain under their original creators’ licenses.
---
Final Notes
I reserve the right to decline any project.
Harassment or rushing will result in cancellation without refund.
By commissioning me, you agree to these terms in full.
Clients please read !
General | Posted 2 months agoHello, so I want to make sure I get everyone for the refund and finishing queue, so if I owe you, please send me a message on Discord!
Wiltedboa_
Or send me an email:
Willobonez[at]gmail.com
I will be working on the list of who I will be refunding and who I will not be refunding over the next week or so. Once done, I will post it. I am currently on a mental health break, but I have gotten a bit of progress on a few comms, which I will send this month to the clients.
Wiltedboa_
Or send me an email:
Willobonez[at]gmail.com
I will be working on the list of who I will be refunding and who I will not be refunding over the next week or so. Once done, I will post it. I am currently on a mental health break, but I have gotten a bit of progress on a few comms, which I will send this month to the clients.
Major Update - necessary read
General | Posted 2 months agoAfter much thought, I have made the decision to step away from the furry community—this includes commissions. While I will be keeping my OCs, I will no longer be active in this fandom.
From here on, my focus will shift almost entirely to the FNAF community and my own original worlds and stories. About 90% of my time and energy will be going toward that. I will also be learning and creating for VRChat, starting with retextures and eventually building full models. In the past week, I’ve discovered that this process makes me feel something I haven’t felt in a long time—it makes me feel the joy of creating again.
The truth is, art no longer brings me the happiness it once did. Years of online conflicts, offline struggles, and the constant weight of judgment and expectations have drained me. On top of that, I’ve had to live with severe pain flare-ups—especially in my wrist—that often make drawing physically impossible. Coupled with mental health struggles, art stopped being an outlet and instead became something that harmed me.
For over three years, art was my only source of income. To survive, I had to lower my prices far beneath the value of my work. This created an overwhelming backlog I couldn’t realistically keep up with. On top of this, I’ve been juggling loans to stay afloat. Right now, I need $1,000 to pay off my debts before I can even begin issuing refunds.
That being said, I will be canceling and refunding the majority of clients. Most bundle orders will not be refunded, but I will be making a full, organized list of who will receive refunds and who will still receive art. This list will be posted later this month. Refunds will take time. I have been unemployed for over three years and currently live on less than $150 a month. My goal is to complete all refunds within 4–6 months, starting once my debt is paid.
To help speed this process up, I will be creating adopts, as well as offering VRChat retextures/edits on base models. This will be my way of generating some income to move things along more quickly.
I know this decision will disappoint some people, but it is the healthiest choice I can make for myself. Since 2021, I have been constantly watched, harassed, and judged—first for mistakes I made as a child, later for mistakes I made when I was at my lowest. No matter how much I have tried to grow and move forward, that weight has never lifted. I cannot keep sacrificing my health and happiness to please others or keep up appearances in a community that has only drained me.
I need to focus on moving forward—on healthier communities, healthier work, and healthier ways of living.
The full refund/client plan will be shared this month. Thank you for your patience and understanding.
Patreon will be active with the monthly art offers until I can fully leave the fandom.
Support me if you want, It would help a tonne.
https://ko-fi.com/wiltedboa
https://cash.app/$ScarletMoonExo
https://venmo.com/code?user_id=3483255076554699904&created=1759412691
https://www.paypal.me/WillOBonezzUT
From here on, my focus will shift almost entirely to the FNAF community and my own original worlds and stories. About 90% of my time and energy will be going toward that. I will also be learning and creating for VRChat, starting with retextures and eventually building full models. In the past week, I’ve discovered that this process makes me feel something I haven’t felt in a long time—it makes me feel the joy of creating again.
The truth is, art no longer brings me the happiness it once did. Years of online conflicts, offline struggles, and the constant weight of judgment and expectations have drained me. On top of that, I’ve had to live with severe pain flare-ups—especially in my wrist—that often make drawing physically impossible. Coupled with mental health struggles, art stopped being an outlet and instead became something that harmed me.
For over three years, art was my only source of income. To survive, I had to lower my prices far beneath the value of my work. This created an overwhelming backlog I couldn’t realistically keep up with. On top of this, I’ve been juggling loans to stay afloat. Right now, I need $1,000 to pay off my debts before I can even begin issuing refunds.
That being said, I will be canceling and refunding the majority of clients. Most bundle orders will not be refunded, but I will be making a full, organized list of who will receive refunds and who will still receive art. This list will be posted later this month. Refunds will take time. I have been unemployed for over three years and currently live on less than $150 a month. My goal is to complete all refunds within 4–6 months, starting once my debt is paid.
To help speed this process up, I will be creating adopts, as well as offering VRChat retextures/edits on base models. This will be my way of generating some income to move things along more quickly.
I know this decision will disappoint some people, but it is the healthiest choice I can make for myself. Since 2021, I have been constantly watched, harassed, and judged—first for mistakes I made as a child, later for mistakes I made when I was at my lowest. No matter how much I have tried to grow and move forward, that weight has never lifted. I cannot keep sacrificing my health and happiness to please others or keep up appearances in a community that has only drained me.
I need to focus on moving forward—on healthier communities, healthier work, and healthier ways of living.
The full refund/client plan will be shared this month. Thank you for your patience and understanding.
Patreon will be active with the monthly art offers until I can fully leave the fandom.
Support me if you want, It would help a tonne.
https://ko-fi.com/wiltedboa
https://cash.app/$ScarletMoonExo
https://venmo.com/code?user_id=3483255076554699904&created=1759412691
https://www.paypal.me/WillOBonezzUT
Really need financial support- still jobless.
General | Posted 2 months agoI hate to make a post like this again, but I have done well over 15 interviews the last month and add half and every single one has been a dead end. I am tired, I am in debt, and I have no form of stable income at this time due to not being able to take on commissions because the actions of my exes. I really need help.
I need to make around $750 or more to pay off mu debt but the goal is well over $1k to be able to put together emergency savings as well.
https://ko-fi.com/wiltedboa
So please, I really need the help, I can send screenshots of all my debts if asked just. Anything helps, I am currently overdrawn by $60..
I need to make around $750 or more to pay off mu debt but the goal is well over $1k to be able to put together emergency savings as well.
https://ko-fi.com/wiltedboa
So please, I really need the help, I can send screenshots of all my debts if asked just. Anything helps, I am currently overdrawn by $60..
PC broken , commissions delayed
General | Posted 3 months agoMy commissions are paused until my PC is fixed, the mother board is completely ruined. So need to order a new one.
https://a.co/4wsbQIz
That being said. I don’t have income so if anyone would like to order it I will be forever grateful.
* I can draw on phone if it comes to it, although that makes my hand hurt alot faster and longer so I rather not.
https://a.co/4wsbQIz
That being said. I don’t have income so if anyone would like to order it I will be forever grateful.
* I can draw on phone if it comes to it, although that makes my hand hurt alot faster and longer so I rather not.
A statement
General | Posted 3 months agoThis will be the last time I speak on this situation. For the past four years, I’ve tried to heal, rebuild, and simply be allowed the space to exist and grow. Instead, I’ve been pulled into unnecessary drama, targeted, and painted in ways that don’t reflect who I am or what I stand for. I am deeply hurt, but I need to be transparent for the sake of closure.
The only reason past drama with one of my exes resurfaced was because the breakup had already been mentioned by other moderators. I didn’t bring it up to start anything — I did it to ensure the full picture was understood. I even brought up my own mistakes to stay transparent. At no point did I ever send people after anyone, and I’ve never tried to run, hide, or dodge accountability. All I wanted was space.
....
A person I’ll call Rock saw certain links being sent in a mod chat, and without being present in the VC, they assumed I was going after my exes. Rock then went to my exes for answers, and also questioned me. In my panic, I assumed my exes were spreading things in Rock’s Discord and became defensive — while still trying to stay as calm as possible.
On their end, my exes also assumed the worst. They believed I was spreading things out of malice, which was not true, and so they got defensive too. From there, things escalated. They began digging up old mistakes and framing them in the worst possible light, and I panicked and handled things poorly. The truth is: both sides acted out of fear, assumptions, and past pain. None of us were blameless.
Unfortunately, words I said years ago — during manic episodes and very dark periods of my life — have been twisted against me. That doesn’t excuse what I said, but it also doesn’t define who I am now. At the time, I was dealing with extreme derealization, dissociation, and brain fog so severe that I lost entire weeks and even a full month from memory. I wasn’t fully present, and I made mistakes I now regret.
And I understand that that is not an excuse for behavior, and I am not using it that way but more so to give the full picture of situational things.
....
Today, things are different. I am in treatment: Cymbalta 120mg, Trazodone 100mg, and regular therapy. I’ve been actively working on myself for over five months. This situation has been a painful setback because it reopened old wounds, but I’m still moving forward. The brain fog has largely receded, though I still have bad days.
Yes, I euthanized a snake. It was not done carelessly. The animal came to me with a pre-existing spinal injury and other health issues. I treated him for months, but his condition worsened. On the advice of a veterinary professional, I made the hard but humane choice to put him down. This happened shortly after my uncle — who I lived with — was convicted of pedophilia. At that time, I was hardly sleeping, spiraling, and saying self-destructive things I never truly meant.
I need to make this clear: I never got “turned on” by it, nor did I ever say anything to suggest that. What I said was tied to “bloodlust,” not sexual euphoria. Even then, it was self-destructive venting, not truth. In reality, I’ve always cared deeply for my animals. I cry when I have to euthanize an injured wild snake hit by a car. I regret those words deeply, but they don’t reflect who I am or how I treat my animals.
I am so reliant on my animals I cannot get rid of specific ones, they are the only reason I am as stable as I am. I got into snakes when being abused by my stepdad these animals are like my children, I will not sell them so long as I can care for them.
.....
First of all, I didn’t start doing anything serious until after the breakup. Before that, sure, maybe a joke here or there, a playful tease, but that was it. Nothing serious, nothing malicious. And I wasn’t the only one doing it either. It was little stuff, like, “lol I think [name] is really into [thing] hmm?” Nothing more.
Secondly, I didn’t replace anyone. That was never the goal. Just because I hooked up or something happened doesn’t mean I tossed people aside. That group flirts playfully, and things escalated naturally. Honestly, we’re all just figuring it out. The mind is strange — I’ve poured my heart into these people, and they’ve poured theirs into me. They are all I have now.
I broke up because my head wasn’t good for my Exes anymore. Everything I did was being taken the wrong way (and still is). Everything I said was misunderstood, and the ways I showed love were dismissed. It felt like I wasn’t being seen for who I actually am, like I’d been forgotten and only the worst parts of me were being focused on.
I show love not in traditional sense, and everyone has their own ways of doing so. Support and gifts are mine, I don't say "I love you" often due to ahyness but also personal preference.. doesnt mean I don't love my at the time partner(s). Just now how I show love.
One of them made it worse. Even before the poly, there was an air of control and pressure. Things had to be edited, changed, or done their way — Serp redesigns, Hulya, even mod decisions. I didn’t want those changes, but I felt cornered into them.
At one point I was criticized for taking time to make sure a member of the server was okay before continuing to issue them a ban.
This isn’t fully about all of my exes either. I tie it all together as a group experience, which makes interacting uncomfortable, but ultimately I don’t hate them. I just needed space from everyone.
I admit I messed up too. I got called out, and I carried that shame. Each little thing piled up until it weighed on me constantly. Then the “dream walking” and “pact” stuff started, and honestly? I never once saw a single sign of it being real. My brain couldn’t believe in it, but it kept being pushed until it just drove me further away. I was already drifting as far back as right after my short month long job at Sea Dog.
The breaking point was when I asked for one OC in full and for a chapter rewrite — then I got yelled at and guilt-tripped. That was it. I snapped. I spiraled. And I needed space. So I blocked, not forever, but to stop making things worse.
I’ve apologized before, multiple times, but here it is again: I’m sorry. I know I hurt people, just as I was hurt. None of us are spotless. We’re all covered in dirt, but I know my mistakes and I have actively been working on myself.
But this, this has made that so hard as it has made me feel hopeless.
Dragging out a breakup over gift money is low. Without a contract, everything they ever sent — games, passes, gift money, money for loans, etc. — is just that: a gift. No legal grounds. What’s happening now is twisting that, weaponizing it to get a way. And to do that when my biggest insecurity is being ostracized — after I’ve already been blackmailed before — that’s cruel. My stepmom, who works in law and knows local judges and lawyers, has confirmed this.
Anytime I said I would pay back was during times they would complain about working alot to help me, I would say to stop sending money and not.to worry and that I will eventually pay them back. Regardless, they always threw those down.
They have asked to be paid for labour time of helping with my commission backlog, no agreement was ever made for them to be paid for such, othet than with a collab YCH but I deceided to fully do that myself. They offered to help.
As for me getting Commissions.
Mind you, I did win bingo for $900 at the end of last year. I used that to splurge, and many commissions I’ve been getting came from then. Everything else was monthly subs, reptile income, or small amounts under $150 when I was stable. I’ve also paid off 90% of my debt until demands from my exes started.
Realistically, I can only draw for about two weeks of each month before chronic pain stops me. My backlog was made worse by unavoidable events: a venomous snake bite last September, moving houses, and a physically demanding job that left me in pain for weeks even after quitting. Add mental health struggles to that, and the delays were inevitable. My TOS has always been upfront about long waits.
So, yes, I could walk away and not pay a cent — and nothing would come of it. You know it, I know it. But because I care, I gave in. The threats, the talk of “gathering evidence,” the pressure — none of it is worth my peace of mind. So I’ve agreed to what I can do:
I will pay $1,000 within six months, even without any stable income.
I will finish my backlog within four months, after taking a short break to recover. (This will start once ny PC is fixed)
The remaining $1.4k will go toward refunds.
I will stay in treatment, continue therapy, and keep working on myself.
But this is the end. The curtain is closing. This is the final chapter of this mess. I will never get to enjoy the art, the community, or the show I loved, because people chose to be petty over a breakup, over not getting their way.
So I’ll say it plainly: I’m done. This is 2021 all over again, and you all are Sneik. Having moles and people watching my activity in VCs, having people spy on me — that’s stalking, that’s making sure every move can be twisted against me.
Back in 2021, i had accusations against me for Zoophilia, I was a stupid kid who would lie about alot of shit to get attention. That back fired on me but I never grew out of it nor got help for that behavior, and it has backfired again.
This is the last I will ever say on the matter. Both I and my exes were wrong in different ways, and the only path forward is to let go, move on, and continue healing.
The only reason past drama with one of my exes resurfaced was because the breakup had already been mentioned by other moderators. I didn’t bring it up to start anything — I did it to ensure the full picture was understood. I even brought up my own mistakes to stay transparent. At no point did I ever send people after anyone, and I’ve never tried to run, hide, or dodge accountability. All I wanted was space.
....
A person I’ll call Rock saw certain links being sent in a mod chat, and without being present in the VC, they assumed I was going after my exes. Rock then went to my exes for answers, and also questioned me. In my panic, I assumed my exes were spreading things in Rock’s Discord and became defensive — while still trying to stay as calm as possible.
On their end, my exes also assumed the worst. They believed I was spreading things out of malice, which was not true, and so they got defensive too. From there, things escalated. They began digging up old mistakes and framing them in the worst possible light, and I panicked and handled things poorly. The truth is: both sides acted out of fear, assumptions, and past pain. None of us were blameless.
Unfortunately, words I said years ago — during manic episodes and very dark periods of my life — have been twisted against me. That doesn’t excuse what I said, but it also doesn’t define who I am now. At the time, I was dealing with extreme derealization, dissociation, and brain fog so severe that I lost entire weeks and even a full month from memory. I wasn’t fully present, and I made mistakes I now regret.
And I understand that that is not an excuse for behavior, and I am not using it that way but more so to give the full picture of situational things.
....
Today, things are different. I am in treatment: Cymbalta 120mg, Trazodone 100mg, and regular therapy. I’ve been actively working on myself for over five months. This situation has been a painful setback because it reopened old wounds, but I’m still moving forward. The brain fog has largely receded, though I still have bad days.
Yes, I euthanized a snake. It was not done carelessly. The animal came to me with a pre-existing spinal injury and other health issues. I treated him for months, but his condition worsened. On the advice of a veterinary professional, I made the hard but humane choice to put him down. This happened shortly after my uncle — who I lived with — was convicted of pedophilia. At that time, I was hardly sleeping, spiraling, and saying self-destructive things I never truly meant.
I need to make this clear: I never got “turned on” by it, nor did I ever say anything to suggest that. What I said was tied to “bloodlust,” not sexual euphoria. Even then, it was self-destructive venting, not truth. In reality, I’ve always cared deeply for my animals. I cry when I have to euthanize an injured wild snake hit by a car. I regret those words deeply, but they don’t reflect who I am or how I treat my animals.
I am so reliant on my animals I cannot get rid of specific ones, they are the only reason I am as stable as I am. I got into snakes when being abused by my stepdad these animals are like my children, I will not sell them so long as I can care for them.
.....
First of all, I didn’t start doing anything serious until after the breakup. Before that, sure, maybe a joke here or there, a playful tease, but that was it. Nothing serious, nothing malicious. And I wasn’t the only one doing it either. It was little stuff, like, “lol I think [name] is really into [thing] hmm?” Nothing more.
Secondly, I didn’t replace anyone. That was never the goal. Just because I hooked up or something happened doesn’t mean I tossed people aside. That group flirts playfully, and things escalated naturally. Honestly, we’re all just figuring it out. The mind is strange — I’ve poured my heart into these people, and they’ve poured theirs into me. They are all I have now.
I broke up because my head wasn’t good for my Exes anymore. Everything I did was being taken the wrong way (and still is). Everything I said was misunderstood, and the ways I showed love were dismissed. It felt like I wasn’t being seen for who I actually am, like I’d been forgotten and only the worst parts of me were being focused on.
I show love not in traditional sense, and everyone has their own ways of doing so. Support and gifts are mine, I don't say "I love you" often due to ahyness but also personal preference.. doesnt mean I don't love my at the time partner(s). Just now how I show love.
One of them made it worse. Even before the poly, there was an air of control and pressure. Things had to be edited, changed, or done their way — Serp redesigns, Hulya, even mod decisions. I didn’t want those changes, but I felt cornered into them.
At one point I was criticized for taking time to make sure a member of the server was okay before continuing to issue them a ban.
This isn’t fully about all of my exes either. I tie it all together as a group experience, which makes interacting uncomfortable, but ultimately I don’t hate them. I just needed space from everyone.
I admit I messed up too. I got called out, and I carried that shame. Each little thing piled up until it weighed on me constantly. Then the “dream walking” and “pact” stuff started, and honestly? I never once saw a single sign of it being real. My brain couldn’t believe in it, but it kept being pushed until it just drove me further away. I was already drifting as far back as right after my short month long job at Sea Dog.
The breaking point was when I asked for one OC in full and for a chapter rewrite — then I got yelled at and guilt-tripped. That was it. I snapped. I spiraled. And I needed space. So I blocked, not forever, but to stop making things worse.
I’ve apologized before, multiple times, but here it is again: I’m sorry. I know I hurt people, just as I was hurt. None of us are spotless. We’re all covered in dirt, but I know my mistakes and I have actively been working on myself.
But this, this has made that so hard as it has made me feel hopeless.
Dragging out a breakup over gift money is low. Without a contract, everything they ever sent — games, passes, gift money, money for loans, etc. — is just that: a gift. No legal grounds. What’s happening now is twisting that, weaponizing it to get a way. And to do that when my biggest insecurity is being ostracized — after I’ve already been blackmailed before — that’s cruel. My stepmom, who works in law and knows local judges and lawyers, has confirmed this.
Anytime I said I would pay back was during times they would complain about working alot to help me, I would say to stop sending money and not.to worry and that I will eventually pay them back. Regardless, they always threw those down.
They have asked to be paid for labour time of helping with my commission backlog, no agreement was ever made for them to be paid for such, othet than with a collab YCH but I deceided to fully do that myself. They offered to help.
As for me getting Commissions.
Mind you, I did win bingo for $900 at the end of last year. I used that to splurge, and many commissions I’ve been getting came from then. Everything else was monthly subs, reptile income, or small amounts under $150 when I was stable. I’ve also paid off 90% of my debt until demands from my exes started.
Realistically, I can only draw for about two weeks of each month before chronic pain stops me. My backlog was made worse by unavoidable events: a venomous snake bite last September, moving houses, and a physically demanding job that left me in pain for weeks even after quitting. Add mental health struggles to that, and the delays were inevitable. My TOS has always been upfront about long waits.
So, yes, I could walk away and not pay a cent — and nothing would come of it. You know it, I know it. But because I care, I gave in. The threats, the talk of “gathering evidence,” the pressure — none of it is worth my peace of mind. So I’ve agreed to what I can do:
I will pay $1,000 within six months, even without any stable income.
I will finish my backlog within four months, after taking a short break to recover. (This will start once ny PC is fixed)
The remaining $1.4k will go toward refunds.
I will stay in treatment, continue therapy, and keep working on myself.
But this is the end. The curtain is closing. This is the final chapter of this mess. I will never get to enjoy the art, the community, or the show I loved, because people chose to be petty over a breakup, over not getting their way.
So I’ll say it plainly: I’m done. This is 2021 all over again, and you all are Sneik. Having moles and people watching my activity in VCs, having people spy on me — that’s stalking, that’s making sure every move can be twisted against me.
Back in 2021, i had accusations against me for Zoophilia, I was a stupid kid who would lie about alot of shit to get attention. That back fired on me but I never grew out of it nor got help for that behavior, and it has backfired again.
This is the last I will ever say on the matter. Both I and my exes were wrong in different ways, and the only path forward is to let go, move on, and continue healing.
Goodbye, or a see you later.
General | Posted 3 months agoThis is a goodbye, or maybe just a see you later. I am done. For the past four years or more, I have tried my hardest to just be allowed to exist and grow. I have not been allowed that luxury, unfortunately.
For years, things have happened to me on such a regular basis that healing has felt impossible. Every time I thought I was making progress, something came along to drag me right back down—job losses, financial emergencies, health struggles, or drama I never wanted to be part of.
No, none of that excuses my mistakes. I fucked up, and I am sorry. I have said and done things out of pain, out of self-destruction, and I regret them deeply. I’ve admitted that, I’ve owned that, I’ve worked to be better—but somehow, it has never been enough.
People don’t see the work I’ve put into changing. They don’t see the effort that goes into every commission, even when I’m battling chronic health issues, PTSD, depression, and insomnia. They don’t see how art is my only source of income, and how I’ve tried to keep up with my backlog even when my body and mind were falling apart.
They don’t see that the only loans I’ve ever taken out were small ones—emergency vet bills, sudden refunds, keeping my head above water after losing work. They don’t see how much it has cost me to keep going at all.
They don’t see the nights I lose sleep over commissions, over community issues, over the fear that no matter what I do, people will only ever see me as who I was, not who I am now. They don’t see how much I care. That I cry over animals suffering. That I have built Scarlet Moon Exotics on a foundation of responsibility and respect for life. That I have given my time, my energy, my heart to educate, to create, to build spaces where people could feel safe and seen.
And yet, the very community I poured myself into—the Discord server I grew, nurtured, and worked so hard to protect—became a place I no longer felt safe. That hurt more than I can ever put into words. Leaving it behind was one of the hardest things I have ever done. But I had to. Because I couldn’t keep pretending that I was okay in a space where I constantly felt like a target instead of a person. It is in good hands now, and I trust the people running it, but walking away from something I built with my whole heart nearly broke me.
Do you think I enjoy living like this? Constantly on edge, constantly wondering if today will be the day people let me move on—or if it’s just another day of whispers, of twisting my words, of painting me as a monster I am not? I am not a monster. I am human. I am flawed, I am broken, but I am trying. And I always have been.
I am tired. Tired of being a scapegoat, your villain, your excuse. Tired of having every word twisted and every effort dismissed. Tired of begging for the space to heal when all I want is to move forward.
If you want to hate me, then hate me. But don’t drag down everything I love with you. Don’t try to ruin Scarlet Moon Exotics. Don’t destroy my art, my projects, my friendships. Don’t take away the last pieces of light I’ve fought to protect through everything.
Because this is it. I can’t keep reliving the same cycle. I can’t keep carrying the weight of the past when I have done everything I can to leave it behind. I don’t want to fight anymore. I don’t want to explain anymore. I don’t want to keep being punished for a version of myself I no longer am.
So go ahead. Believe what you want. Twist it however you need to. But know this: I am not giving up. Even if I have to rebuild from nothing again, I will keep going. I will keep healing. I will keep creating. I will keep building Scarlet Moon Exotics, I will keep making art, I will keep fighting to be someone I can be proud of. Even if I have to do it alone.
At the end of the day, I am human. And no one can take that away from me.
And for you, the ones I know who are watching me. I will not be complying and losing that I love again because you have taken everything against me for your own gain. Do what you will.
For years, things have happened to me on such a regular basis that healing has felt impossible. Every time I thought I was making progress, something came along to drag me right back down—job losses, financial emergencies, health struggles, or drama I never wanted to be part of.
No, none of that excuses my mistakes. I fucked up, and I am sorry. I have said and done things out of pain, out of self-destruction, and I regret them deeply. I’ve admitted that, I’ve owned that, I’ve worked to be better—but somehow, it has never been enough.
People don’t see the work I’ve put into changing. They don’t see the effort that goes into every commission, even when I’m battling chronic health issues, PTSD, depression, and insomnia. They don’t see how art is my only source of income, and how I’ve tried to keep up with my backlog even when my body and mind were falling apart.
They don’t see that the only loans I’ve ever taken out were small ones—emergency vet bills, sudden refunds, keeping my head above water after losing work. They don’t see how much it has cost me to keep going at all.
They don’t see the nights I lose sleep over commissions, over community issues, over the fear that no matter what I do, people will only ever see me as who I was, not who I am now. They don’t see how much I care. That I cry over animals suffering. That I have built Scarlet Moon Exotics on a foundation of responsibility and respect for life. That I have given my time, my energy, my heart to educate, to create, to build spaces where people could feel safe and seen.
And yet, the very community I poured myself into—the Discord server I grew, nurtured, and worked so hard to protect—became a place I no longer felt safe. That hurt more than I can ever put into words. Leaving it behind was one of the hardest things I have ever done. But I had to. Because I couldn’t keep pretending that I was okay in a space where I constantly felt like a target instead of a person. It is in good hands now, and I trust the people running it, but walking away from something I built with my whole heart nearly broke me.
Do you think I enjoy living like this? Constantly on edge, constantly wondering if today will be the day people let me move on—or if it’s just another day of whispers, of twisting my words, of painting me as a monster I am not? I am not a monster. I am human. I am flawed, I am broken, but I am trying. And I always have been.
I am tired. Tired of being a scapegoat, your villain, your excuse. Tired of having every word twisted and every effort dismissed. Tired of begging for the space to heal when all I want is to move forward.
If you want to hate me, then hate me. But don’t drag down everything I love with you. Don’t try to ruin Scarlet Moon Exotics. Don’t destroy my art, my projects, my friendships. Don’t take away the last pieces of light I’ve fought to protect through everything.
Because this is it. I can’t keep reliving the same cycle. I can’t keep carrying the weight of the past when I have done everything I can to leave it behind. I don’t want to fight anymore. I don’t want to explain anymore. I don’t want to keep being punished for a version of myself I no longer am.
So go ahead. Believe what you want. Twist it however you need to. But know this: I am not giving up. Even if I have to rebuild from nothing again, I will keep going. I will keep healing. I will keep creating. I will keep building Scarlet Moon Exotics, I will keep making art, I will keep fighting to be someone I can be proud of. Even if I have to do it alone.
At the end of the day, I am human. And no one can take that away from me.
And for you, the ones I know who are watching me. I will not be complying and losing that I love again because you have taken everything against me for your own gain. Do what you will.
Hiatus, only active on patreon going forward.
General | Posted 3 months agoDue to personal reasons, I have stepped away from the community and social media. If you need to reach me, I will only be active on Patreon for the foreseeable future. All of my NSFW art will be behind a paywall, and my normal art will be posted publicly.
https://www.patreon.com/Wiltedboa?u.....rshare_creator
https://www.patreon.com/Wiltedboa?u.....rshare_creator
Taking offers on all my OCs
General | Posted 3 months agohttps://toyhou.se/WiltedBoa/characters/folder:all
Just comment an offer and on who. Some I will not let go of for cheap if at all but I will entertain.
Just comment an offer and on who. Some I will not let go of for cheap if at all but I will entertain.
.....
General | Posted 3 months agoHate me all you want, I don't care anymore. I am tired. I have no ill intent towards any of you, I haven’t even said shit about you guys unless to people who wanted to know. But what, I am the liar? The bad guy? The deranged person? I have had severe mental issues for years, but what, that doesn't justify shit? I know! That is why I am trying to fix myself for you all! But no, that doesn't fucking matter. Shit you all said on VC is untraceable and you are using that to your advantage. I AM SO FUCKING TIRED. Just leave me the fuck alone and stop ruining my community and friendships. I would never try to do that to you ever. I do still care, but seeing this kind of shit hurts. I am done, I will be backing off from everything if this continues.
I cannot handle another round of losing everything again all because I have been through shit and was self-destructive until I started to get the fucking help I have been needing for so long. I am trying so hard to heal and move on and be a better person, but how can I when all that happens is people thinking I deserve to seep in the actions of my past? How can I move on when all I know is the person I was and not the person I am? It is so hard to heal when you are not given the chance. I have tried so many times, but for what? To have everything I have ever said or done be misshapen, twisted, convoluted, and so much more to make me look like someone with no feelings or remorse? I do care. I still care. I cry over seeing snakes killed, I cry over seeing rats hurt, I refuse to hurt a damn animal. Yet I did, and I beat myself up about it and made it look like I enjoyed it just to make myself look horrible. I said shit, but I never fucking meant any of it. I was self-destructive, but I became aware and I am trying to move the fuck on, but I can't when no one seems to understand a word I cry.
You think I enjoy living like this? Constantly on edge, constantly feeling like no matter what I do, it will never be enough? I wake up every day wondering if today is the day people will finally just let me be, or if it’s another day of whispers, another day of twisting my words, another day of painting me as a monster I am not. I am not a monster. I am human, I am broken, and I am trying. But trying doesn’t seem to matter to anyone when all you want to see is my downfall.
Do you not understand how much it kills me to lose people I once called friends? To lose communities I built with my own hands and heart? You think I don’t notice when people back away, when people leave, when people pretend like I never mattered in the first place? I notice. Every single time. And it cuts deeper than I can ever put into words.
I am not asking for pity. I am not asking for forgiveness. All I am asking for is the chance to prove I am not the same person I once was. The chance to breathe without being suffocated by the past. I have made mistakes—I own that. I have said things I should have never said—I own that too. But don’t dare tell me I am incapable of change when I have clawed my way through hell just to find the strength to try.
If you want to hate me, then hate me. But don’t drag down everything I love with you. Don’t destroy the few things I have left just to spite me. Because one day, when the dust settles, maybe you will finally see that all I ever wanted was to heal, to grow, and to finally, finally stop being treated like the ghost of who I used to be.
Maybe this is the last time I’ll ever speak on this. Maybe it won’t matter, maybe it’ll just get twisted again like everything else I say. But I have to put it down, because if I don’t, it’ll eat me alive.
I am tired of being your scapegoat, your punching bag, your villain. I am tired of watching everything I build get ripped apart because people can’t let go of the image they created of me. That’s not who I am anymore. That’s not who I want to be anymore. I have worked too hard, fought too hard, to stay trapped in a cycle that does nothing but break me.
I am still here because I care. I care about my community. I care about the people who stood by me when I had nothing. I care about the animals I protect and the friendships I try to hold onto. If I didn’t care, I would have walked away long ago. But I stayed, I fought for a chance to be better, and all I’ve gotten in return is silence, rumors, and knives in my back.
I don’t want to fight anymore. I don’t want to beg for understanding anymore. I don’t want to keep reliving a past I am already punishing myself for. I just want peace. I just want to keep moving forward, no matter how slow, no matter how hard.
So go ahead. Call me what you want. Believe whatever makes it easier for you to hate me. But know this: I am not stopping. I am not giving up. I will keep healing, I will keep building, I will keep moving forward—even if I have to do it alone. Because at the end of the day, I know who I am now. And no one can take that away from me.
I cannot handle another round of losing everything again all because I have been through shit and was self-destructive until I started to get the fucking help I have been needing for so long. I am trying so hard to heal and move on and be a better person, but how can I when all that happens is people thinking I deserve to seep in the actions of my past? How can I move on when all I know is the person I was and not the person I am? It is so hard to heal when you are not given the chance. I have tried so many times, but for what? To have everything I have ever said or done be misshapen, twisted, convoluted, and so much more to make me look like someone with no feelings or remorse? I do care. I still care. I cry over seeing snakes killed, I cry over seeing rats hurt, I refuse to hurt a damn animal. Yet I did, and I beat myself up about it and made it look like I enjoyed it just to make myself look horrible. I said shit, but I never fucking meant any of it. I was self-destructive, but I became aware and I am trying to move the fuck on, but I can't when no one seems to understand a word I cry.
You think I enjoy living like this? Constantly on edge, constantly feeling like no matter what I do, it will never be enough? I wake up every day wondering if today is the day people will finally just let me be, or if it’s another day of whispers, another day of twisting my words, another day of painting me as a monster I am not. I am not a monster. I am human, I am broken, and I am trying. But trying doesn’t seem to matter to anyone when all you want to see is my downfall.
Do you not understand how much it kills me to lose people I once called friends? To lose communities I built with my own hands and heart? You think I don’t notice when people back away, when people leave, when people pretend like I never mattered in the first place? I notice. Every single time. And it cuts deeper than I can ever put into words.
I am not asking for pity. I am not asking for forgiveness. All I am asking for is the chance to prove I am not the same person I once was. The chance to breathe without being suffocated by the past. I have made mistakes—I own that. I have said things I should have never said—I own that too. But don’t dare tell me I am incapable of change when I have clawed my way through hell just to find the strength to try.
If you want to hate me, then hate me. But don’t drag down everything I love with you. Don’t destroy the few things I have left just to spite me. Because one day, when the dust settles, maybe you will finally see that all I ever wanted was to heal, to grow, and to finally, finally stop being treated like the ghost of who I used to be.
Maybe this is the last time I’ll ever speak on this. Maybe it won’t matter, maybe it’ll just get twisted again like everything else I say. But I have to put it down, because if I don’t, it’ll eat me alive.
I am tired of being your scapegoat, your punching bag, your villain. I am tired of watching everything I build get ripped apart because people can’t let go of the image they created of me. That’s not who I am anymore. That’s not who I want to be anymore. I have worked too hard, fought too hard, to stay trapped in a cycle that does nothing but break me.
I am still here because I care. I care about my community. I care about the people who stood by me when I had nothing. I care about the animals I protect and the friendships I try to hold onto. If I didn’t care, I would have walked away long ago. But I stayed, I fought for a chance to be better, and all I’ve gotten in return is silence, rumors, and knives in my back.
I don’t want to fight anymore. I don’t want to beg for understanding anymore. I don’t want to keep reliving a past I am already punishing myself for. I just want peace. I just want to keep moving forward, no matter how slow, no matter how hard.
So go ahead. Call me what you want. Believe whatever makes it easier for you to hate me. But know this: I am not stopping. I am not giving up. I will keep healing, I will keep building, I will keep moving forward—even if I have to do it alone. Because at the end of the day, I know who I am now. And no one can take that away from me.
Patreon! Help me stay on my feet.
General | Posted 3 months agoAnd we are live! I have finally set up a way that you all can support me and get stuff in return. Plenty of tiers to pick all with various rewards. Every single option includes monthly artwork for you AND a raffle for a free custom adopt monthly.
https://patreon.com/Wiltedboa?utm_medium=unknown&utm_source=join_link&utm_campaign=creatorshare_fan&utm_content=copyLink
rewards will be changed if it becomes too many on it but I do not expect many supporters.
https://patreon.com/Wiltedboa?utm_medium=unknown&utm_source=join_link&utm_campaign=creatorshare_fan&utm_content=copyLink
rewards will be changed if it becomes too many on it but I do not expect many supporters.
Bit slow
General | Posted 4 months agoHello everyone so this is just a post saying that I qill be taking some time away, I will still be working on comms jsut not prioritizing them for a couple of weeks, if I said ill get your to you soon even just a wip I still will just othwr peojects will be slower.
I just broke up with all my partners and it was not a easy thing to do , but it was the best for my mental health. I will focus on my self for a bit and work on comms.
I have some interviews soon so hopefully one takes.
Thank you for understanding.
I just broke up with all my partners and it was not a easy thing to do , but it was the best for my mental health. I will focus on my self for a bit and work on comms.
I have some interviews soon so hopefully one takes.
Thank you for understanding.
I am getting annoyed..
General | Posted 4 months agospent a whole day on a logo, only for the person to hate it and not tell me they found someone else. :). And I did it before they paid because they are trustworthy in the reptile industry. I think I will stop doing reptile logos despite enjoying them so much..
Goodbye, maybe? (Read please)
General | Posted 4 months agoHey guys, unfortunately this is a more seriously toned post.
It’s become increasingly clear to me that people are still failing to comprehend my existence—or at the very least, the information I provide.
I've had too many clients (especially from the furry fandom) who seem to completely lack basic reading comprehension. Bios, posts, pinned messages—they're all there for a reason. They’re not filler. They're meant to help you, the client, understand exactly what you're agreeing to before payment is sent.
I get it. Everyone has a different definition of “professional.” But I’m tired of the assumption that every artist is working under the same conditions, speed, or systems. Life doesn’t work that way—and neither do I.
I am not responsible for disappointment or “misunderstandings” when the information is laid out across all my platforms: my bio, my journals, my queue, my Ko-Fi page, and more. I post updates publicly because if I don’t, I get accused of ghosting or worse. I’m damned if I do, damned if I don’t.
I don’t have the time or mental bandwidth to message every client weekly with updates. I tried. I made a Discord server—barely anyone joined. I tried Telegram—I hated it. I tried Trello—and got yelled at for managing my own damn queue.
So tell me—what more am I supposed to do?
Should I force every single client to fill out a Google form and quiz them on my TOS just to prove they actually read it?
Because until I get out of the debt I’m drowning in, I have to keep accepting commissions. I have to survive. And since I can’t seem to land a job no matter how hard I try, this is all I have.
But no matter how hard I work, no matter how much I lower my prices, no matter how many pieces I finish—it never feels like enough. I’ve done 8 artworks for $200. That’s not sustainable. That doesn’t even cover what I owe, let alone my bills or food or medication.
In just the past three months, I’ve had five clients demand refunds over issues clearly outlined in my TOS. Refunds I had to give, not because they were deserved, but because I couldn’t deal with the harassment or threats.
Yes—threats.
Let me make this clear:
Saying “I want my art ASAP or else” is blackmail.
It’s coercion.
It’s emotional manipulation.
It’s abuse.
And I’ve had three separate people do this to me in just four months.
I’m fucking tired.
So here’s the reality:
I’m dealing with fallout from last year that I couldn’t control.
I owe over 40 clients more than 100 pieces of art.
My wrist is injured and I physically can’t draw 24/7.
I’m still trying to find a stable job.
And I’m barely holding it together outside of art.
Going forward:
I’ll be updating my TOS with stricter rules.
You’ll need to send me a password from my TOS page when commissioning me.
I will not cater to demands, blackmail, or manipulation.
And maybe… once this backlog is cleared, I’ll finally leave this fandom behind.
I’m tired of being treated like I’m disposable.
I’m tired of being pushed to the edge by people who refuse to read.
Take care.
And if you’re a fellow artist: protect yourself. You deserve better too.
*******
🧾 Full TOS:
🔗 https://wiltedboa.straw.page/
It’s become increasingly clear to me that people are still failing to comprehend my existence—or at the very least, the information I provide.
I've had too many clients (especially from the furry fandom) who seem to completely lack basic reading comprehension. Bios, posts, pinned messages—they're all there for a reason. They’re not filler. They're meant to help you, the client, understand exactly what you're agreeing to before payment is sent.
I get it. Everyone has a different definition of “professional.” But I’m tired of the assumption that every artist is working under the same conditions, speed, or systems. Life doesn’t work that way—and neither do I.
I am not responsible for disappointment or “misunderstandings” when the information is laid out across all my platforms: my bio, my journals, my queue, my Ko-Fi page, and more. I post updates publicly because if I don’t, I get accused of ghosting or worse. I’m damned if I do, damned if I don’t.
I don’t have the time or mental bandwidth to message every client weekly with updates. I tried. I made a Discord server—barely anyone joined. I tried Telegram—I hated it. I tried Trello—and got yelled at for managing my own damn queue.
So tell me—what more am I supposed to do?
Should I force every single client to fill out a Google form and quiz them on my TOS just to prove they actually read it?
Because until I get out of the debt I’m drowning in, I have to keep accepting commissions. I have to survive. And since I can’t seem to land a job no matter how hard I try, this is all I have.
But no matter how hard I work, no matter how much I lower my prices, no matter how many pieces I finish—it never feels like enough. I’ve done 8 artworks for $200. That’s not sustainable. That doesn’t even cover what I owe, let alone my bills or food or medication.
In just the past three months, I’ve had five clients demand refunds over issues clearly outlined in my TOS. Refunds I had to give, not because they were deserved, but because I couldn’t deal with the harassment or threats.
Yes—threats.
Let me make this clear:
Saying “I want my art ASAP or else” is blackmail.
It’s coercion.
It’s emotional manipulation.
It’s abuse.
And I’ve had three separate people do this to me in just four months.
I’m fucking tired.
So here’s the reality:
I’m dealing with fallout from last year that I couldn’t control.
I owe over 40 clients more than 100 pieces of art.
My wrist is injured and I physically can’t draw 24/7.
I’m still trying to find a stable job.
And I’m barely holding it together outside of art.
Going forward:
I’ll be updating my TOS with stricter rules.
You’ll need to send me a password from my TOS page when commissioning me.
I will not cater to demands, blackmail, or manipulation.
And maybe… once this backlog is cleared, I’ll finally leave this fandom behind.
I’m tired of being treated like I’m disposable.
I’m tired of being pushed to the edge by people who refuse to read.
Take care.
And if you’re a fellow artist: protect yourself. You deserve better too.
*******
🧾 Full TOS:
🔗 https://wiltedboa.straw.page/
once again read my fucking TOS.
General | Posted 4 months agoI do not exactly understand what more I have to do, It is clear as day in my: bio, notes, journals, kofi, and so many other places that I am NOT a fast artist that I WILL not get a sketch to you by next monday or some shit. I have an extreme backlog due to extremely unfortunate events occurring last year, I am just getting started on commissions from 6 months ago. I know, Im slow, and I am sorry for that. I know I owe a lot of art, and I am sorry. but I am trying my absolute damndest to catch up and finish them all.
so please, read my TOS. This is what is all my posts and my bio:
📌 PLEASE READ BEFORE COMMISSIONING!
By commissioning me, you agree to my TOS. I work in planned batches and updates may take time due to health, animal care, and other obligations.
As of June 21, 2025, all commissions are delayed; I am sketching all orders before finishing any.
My refund policy is “No Refund Unless Absolutely Necessary.” Do not commission me if you need fast turnaround or dislike stylized anatomy. NSFW clients must be 18+.
Complaints about delays or new slot openings will result in blacklisting.
🧾 Full TOS:
🔗 https://wiltedboa.straw.page/
Thank you for your patience and support! 💜
as of now,
the status in this journal still applies:
https://www.furaffinity.net/journal/11174920
so please, read my TOS. This is what is all my posts and my bio:
📌 PLEASE READ BEFORE COMMISSIONING!
By commissioning me, you agree to my TOS. I work in planned batches and updates may take time due to health, animal care, and other obligations.
As of June 21, 2025, all commissions are delayed; I am sketching all orders before finishing any.
My refund policy is “No Refund Unless Absolutely Necessary.” Do not commission me if you need fast turnaround or dislike stylized anatomy. NSFW clients must be 18+.
Complaints about delays or new slot openings will result in blacklisting.
🧾 Full TOS:
🔗 https://wiltedboa.straw.page/
Thank you for your patience and support! 💜
as of now,
the status in this journal still applies:
https://www.furaffinity.net/journal/11174920
One $10 icon available - need to cover overdraft
General | Posted 4 months agoIll take one slot of a $10 icon, I overdrafted.
Need $400 asap huge discount offer !
General | Posted 4 months ago$400
For;
3 ref sheets *normally $150 each*
4 icons
4 fullbodies
2 digital badges
Done before end of October.
Or $200 for:
3 ref sheets
2 icons
2 fullbodies
1 digital badge
For;
3 ref sheets *normally $150 each*
4 icons
4 fullbodies
2 digital badges
Done before end of October.
Or $200 for:
3 ref sheets
2 icons
2 fullbodies
1 digital badge
Please help.
General | Posted 4 months agoHey. I need to help with the electricity bill starting this next month.. if I cannot make about $200 soon they may force me to sell my pets despite how attached I am and that they legit are what I am going to be using soon in some educational venues. I do not want to lose my pets, please.
I will do *anything* for $200+
Even stuff I normally would decline.
I will do *anything* for $200+
Even stuff I normally would decline.
